


Freedom Fighters League of the Exiled

by xxdeathwishxx212



Series: Freedom Series [2]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F, F/M, M/M, Revolution, Superpowers, ereri
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-31
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:27:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 112
Words: 211,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23409025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xxdeathwishxx212/pseuds/xxdeathwishxx212
Summary: This story is the sequel to Freedom Scouts School for Powered Individuals. Since the end of that story, it’s been three years and society as a whole has changed. Heavy restrictions for people with powers have been put in place as well as laws that make it possible for people to openly discriminate against them.There is a war going on between people with powers and the government. Some powered individuals are actively fighting back and others are just trying to keep their heads down. The people fighting back have been labeled “the exiled.” They need to keep their heads down and stay under the radar or risk being caught or worse killed. The Exiled often make “costumes.” Costumes being mostly normal clothes that have been designed to fit their powers in a way that they choose.The school was closed down before any of the insane laws were put into place. Pixis could tell where this was leading gave students the option of returning to society or going with him and the teachers underground.See last chapter of Freedom Scouts for full Summary (the word count cut me off)
Relationships: Krista Lenz | Historia Reiss/Ymir, Levi/Eren Yeager, Marco Bott & Jean Kirstein, Mikasa Ackerman/Annie Leonhart, Reiner Braun/Bertolt Hoover
Series: Freedom Series [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1683856
Comments: 7
Kudos: 101





	1. Change

I never realized just how much could change in such a short time. How long has it been now? Two- no, three years. I can remember it so vividly despite it feeling all like it was a dream. We were all still at the school so oblivious to the world around us. Not a worry in the world, everything was happy and peaceful. It all feels like a lifetime ago now. Little did we know that our lives would change this drastically. That war was on the horizon.

It all started with one greedy little businessman. Then the lawsuit that changed everything. Why couldn’t he have just been honest about it? He wanted to fire a woman because she made a formal complaint about sexual harassment from him. Rather than just admit that he was wrong for firing her he made the argument that he didn’t feel safe because of her power. Her power just happened to be a form of pyrokinesis.

Everyone could tell it was a bullshit excuse used to cover his own ass. Everyone except the judges apparently. The lawsuit made its way through every court until it reached the supreme court. The shock around the world when he won the case caused riots. By this point, everything had started changing in our everyday lives. I remember being kicked out of the cafe I had been going to for years just for wearing my school ID. It was a key indicator that I had powers and they made it known that I wasn’t welcome.

More and more cases started popping up using the same bullshit excuse. That’s when Pixis brought it all to our attention two years ago. When he gave us all the choice. I remember sitting there in the gym with nothing but fear as he spoke.

“As of tomorrow, I am shutting down this school. I am sorry everyone but it is hard to ignore the increasing hostility towards people with powers. I will pay for everyone's trips back home and see to it that you all get there safe. However, I don’t think any of this is going to blow over soon. No, I suspect that it’s going to get worse. So I am giving you the option to come with me. I have a place set up where we can go until all this dies down. Most of the teachers have agreed to come as well. After tomorrow if you are still here I am taking it that you are coming with me. The choice is yours come with me or go home. That is all.”

I remember talking it over with the rest of the class. Most people were planning on going with Pixis since none of us really had homes to go back to anyway. It seems that our class was the only ones who thought so since when the next day came it was only our class and three other kids. They were younger than us. Pixis didn’t ask any questions he just nodded and had us follow him. We all waited in the gym until night time before leaving.

He was right when he said things would get worse. I think the other kids must regret not going with him. A few months after going underground a bunch of new laws were put in place. Powered individuals, or as they called us now, “the cursed” are required to wear badges around their necks with their names and powers on them. Each badge was issued by the government with a different color. Red meaning the user had weak powers and weren’t much of a threat, Green meaning medium-strength powers and to be cautious, and Dark Blue meaning strong powers and to stay far away from them.

After that system was put in place more and more places started banning “the cursed” from their businesses. Some businesses would have signed in their windows saying who was banned. One place would say “No blue and green cursed” whereas another would just say “no cursed” in general. Oh and don’t even get me started about any government buildings. If a blue badge was even caught walking in front of it they could be detained if not shot on sight.

None of us have badges since we went underground before they made the law. Which means we have to be extra careful. Anyone caught with powers who doesn’t have a badge will be arrested… if you're lucky. Some people are shot on the spot if they are suspected to have strong powers, or if they are expected to resist.

A little over a year ago all of us started getting restless, and we weren’t the only ones. We wanted change and we were tired of hiding. We wanted to fight. More and more people started coming forward. Most people were detained and sent to correctional camps where they would be “fixed” mostly just brainwashed into believing their powers to be evil and to never use them.

We, on the other hand, decided to be smarter about it. We had outfits made that hide our identities. Masks and clothes we only wore when we were out making a stand. The government could no longer ignore us or any others like us.

They started calling us the Exiled claiming that we have exiled ourselves from society on purpose in order to break the rules. Which they aren’t wrong since that's exactly what we are doing. However, the only rules we are breaking are the ones they put in to discriminate against us.

“Hey, you okay?” I heard a familiar voice ask as he placed a hand on my shoulder.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I cleared my throat bringing myself back to reality. I realized I was staring through the cracks of the boarded-up window. How long was I sitting here? The sun was already going down. “Are you done training already?” I asked turning my head to look up at him.

“Eren,” Levi’s voice held concern as he took a seat next to me. Damn, it didn’t matter what I told him he’s probably been watching my thoughts this whole time.

“Sorry, I’m okay really. Sometimes it’s just hard to stop myself from thinking what would have happened if that damn court case ended differently, or better yet if it never happened at all,” I couldn’t help but let out a depressed little sigh.

“Well, we will never know now, will we? We lost that day sure, but we still have a chance to win. If we stop fighting then we lose. If we back down and give in to all the shit they are doing then we will never get to win. They may have won the battle but we will win the war,” Levi said before standing up and reaching his hand out for me to take.

I took his hand and got up off my ass and looked around the building for a minute. It’s been empty for over a decade and now it’s full of life. It’s not the cleanest place, but it’s home. After all those thoughts from the past, I can’t help but feel a little nostalgic. I miss that grassy field we always used to lay in. You remember that field right Levi?

“Of course,” he hummed “the place where you first kissed me, how could I ever forget.”

“One day I want to go back there and marry you right there on that field,” I smiled and Levi gave my hand a tight squeeze.

“I’ll fight like hell to make that dream a reality,” he said and I saw his eyes glance to Erwin who had just finished watching two other people spar.

He looked back at me and smiled, “so how about you and me spar a little, get some practice in for the night.”

“Well, I’ve got nothing better to do.” I laughed and Levi waved Erwin over to spot us.

We walked over to the circle spray-painted on the floor and Erwin stood just outside the circle and gave us a nod. “Alright, you know the rules. Don’t hold back too much, but don’t destroy the building and lastly the first one out of the circle loses. Okay, three… two… one...Spar!”


	2. Sparring

Instantly I felt my body move to the edge of the ring. He almost managed to push me out but I caught myself increasing the gravity on myself keeping me in place. I gave him a smirk knowing this move would be useless and he would counteract due to reading my thoughts. I caused a gravity field just outside the ring flipping the gravity so that it pulls objects towards it. Levi had already jumped out of the way and moved in closer to me giving me a little smirk.

Just as planned. I saw the smirk drop off his face when he realized he walked right into my trap. There was a reason there was a circle spray-painted on the ceiling too and that was because this wasn’t the first time I‘ve done this move.

I flipped the gravity on us causing us both to start floating to the ceiling. I got my feet on the ceiling and fixed it so I stayed in place. He used his power and tried to get himself stabilized. He managed to get his footing on the ground giving me a glare for pulling such a cheap trick.

I looked around and smiled, “It looks like we’ve got an audience.”

Levi looked at me and I knew I was going to be screwed. “Good, they can see you lose,” he said before I felt a horrible sadness take over for a moment making me drop my guard causing the gravity everywhere to go back to normal. Everywhere aside from the one, I placed on myself since that's where I tried to keep all my focus.

Empath overload. He’s trying to overload my senses with emotions. Guess we are both using some cheap tricks huh babe? I asked mentally seeing him smirk a little. “Too bad you’re holding back,” I said before taking a deep breath and flipping the gravity once again causing everything around me to start floating up to the ceiling where I was still secured in place with a different gravitational force.

I have to end this fast. I can’t keep this up for much longer. I could already feel my wrists start to ache. While he was distracted still trying to get his footing I used another gravity field outside the circle. I thought I had him but he moved himself out of the way with his telekinesis. Shit. He was close to me so I did another gravity field causing him to come towards me. I was about to flip it the second he got close enough for it to shoot him out of the ring but my timer was up.

“Fuck!” Was all I had time to say as I felt my wrists scream in agony. The second my feet came off the ceiling I knew it was over. I came face to face with the ground only to stop seconds before impact.

“Babe, you okay?” Levi asked, lowering himself down next to where he had me suspended in the air. He looked really concerned. Damn, I did it again I made him worry about me.

“Yeah, I just overdid it,” I sighed, “Sorry, I should have given up sooner.”

“No, I’m sorry I should have made sure you had your braces before taking you in the ring. Besides, I know you never give up and that's what I love about you,” he said letting me down on my feet. He gave me his hand and we walked out of the ring together.

“It’s a draw,” Erwin shook his head, “again.”

“Well, it’s nice to keep the score 4 to 4,” Levi shrugged.

“I could have sworn it was 5 to 4,” I said teasingly.

“You wish.”

We walked over towards the rooms. Well, the closest thing we had to rooms. Petra was kind enough to use her powers to make small areas with walls for privacy. With curtains and rags and doors. Each section had a mattress and some personal belongings as well as a few different pairs of clothes. A few rooms were a little bigger than the others. All the teachers had one of these bigger rooms with two mattresses in them in case a student needed some comfort they could go to them no questions asked. The other rooms that were a medium size were rooms like mine and Levi’s where there were two people sharing one room.

We went into our room and Levi had me sit on the mattress while he grabbed my wraps and braces. He gently wrapped my arms before putting my braces over the top. “Better?”

“Much,” I gave him a smile and he helped me up.

“Alright, let’s go see mom,” he said and I nodded.

Levi had told Ms. Magnolia that we were planning on going with Erwin. The next day she showed up at the school with a small suitcase packed. She insisted on coming with us saying, “if my babies are going then so am I.” We knew there would be no arguing with her.

When we told Pixis he got a kick out of the whole thing and said he didn’t mind her coming with us. When she got to know the rest of the kids Levi warned me what would happen but I didn’t believe him until I saw it with my own eyes. Long story short she’s pretty much adopted every single one of us and everyone calls her mom now.

We made it to her room and bumped into one of the other students who had left with us. She was the youngest. “Thanks, Mom.”

“No problem Mina anytime you need to talk I’m here,” Mom said before Mina left.

We gave a little knock at the door and her face brightened up seeing us walk in.

“Aw there’s my boys,” she said, gesturing for us to sit. “I heard you two were sparing again how’d it go?”

“Well,” Levi rubbed the back of his neck.

“We tied,” I shrugged.

“Oh I see,” she laughed, “still staying evenly matched I see.

“More like Eren didn’t have his braces on and Levi took pity on him,” Jean said from the doorway.

“Ugh Levi,” she sighed, “I’ve told you to watch out for him, and Eren you know better,” she said and I felt the lecture of a lifetime coming.

I turned around to glare at Jean. When he spoke up again. “Don’t worry they didn’t push him too hard, they stopped the second his wrists started hurting,” he lied. Damn, it takes some balls to lie to mom.

“I’m sure they did,” Mom said unconvinced.

“Do you mind if I steal Eren for a minute?” he asked and I both felt grateful and pissed off at him. Grateful that he’s saving me from the lecture pissed off that he’s the one who threw us under the bus to start with. Good luck Levi she’s going to chew you out. I thought before standing up and leaving the room with Jean Marco was standing in the hallway next to him. I could hear Mom lecturing Levi from a few rooms down.

“So Orbit, wanna spot me and Marco in a sparring match? We asked Erwin, but he’s talking with Hanji at the moment.”

“What’s with the code name?” I asked if we hardly ever use them unless we are out on missions.

“I’m just trying to get used to calling you something other than dickface that’s all,” he shrugged.

I rolled my eyes, “I walked right into that one,” I mumbled before looking back up at him, “sure, but get Levi out of there first,” I said looking back towards mom’s room.

“Fine but you owe me one.”

“As if, you’re the reason he’s getting lectured in the first place.”

“Fine Marco could you get him?” he asked and Marco nodded.

“Seriously though, are your arms doing okay?” he asked, looking at them,” yeah I’m okay, power backlash is just a bitch. I miss the days where I used to just get tired.

“Well, they aren’t meant to be used this way, they are meant to save us from life or death situations, so overuse is something very new to us.” He let out a sigh, “I didn’t rat you out to mom cause I want you to get yelled at… well maybe a little, but because I want you to be more careful. The stronger the power the stronger the backlash, remember that,” he said just as Marco and Levi came out to join us.

“Thanks for getting me out of there,” he said to both me and Marco. “As for you,” he said walking up to Jean and smacking him upside the head, “You’re a dick.”

Jean just rubbed the back of his head glaring at Levi, “I wouldn’t have to be if you guys actually took this seriously,” he mumbled before walking towards the ring.

Levi and I stood outside the ring before remembering to take a few steps back. “I don’t think I need to go over the rules,” I said before looking at Jean, “You specifically, try and keep your power in the ring, please. I don’t need to get hit with a fireball again.”

“That was one time,” Jean rolled his eyes.

“Twelve,” Levi said deadpan.

“Same thing,” Jean mumbled before shaking his head, “can we just start already.”

“Alright,” I said before looking at Levi and nodding.

“Three… two… one… Spar!” Levi said and instantly we saw both fire and ice spring up in the circle. One second I was freezing and the next I was burning. They need to take it down a notch.

I found myself squinting to see anything as the ring filled up with steam. “Dammit Jean we can’t see anything,” I yelled and a moment later someone flew out of the ring. We turned around to see who just got knocked out.

“Sorry baby,” Marco yelled running out of the ring. Jean was lying flat on his back a few feet away from the ring.

“It’s all good,” he said, giving a weak thumbs up.

“I couldn’t see him and I used my ice and then I heard a thud,” Marco said panicked as he knelt down next to Jean.

“He’ll be fine, he's got a thick skull,” I shrugged before looking to Levi. “What’s the score?”

“Marco 7 Jean 5,” Levi said writing it down on a notepad.

“Good job babe you kicked my ass,” Jean said as Marco helped him up.

“I didn’t mean to hit you that hard, maybe we should see Hanji,” Marco suggested but Jean just blew it off.

“Nah I’ll be okay you just knocked the wind out of me,” he laughed.

I just nudged Levi, “maybe we should check with Pixis and Shadis see if they have any missions planned,” I mumbled.

“Getting restless I see.”

“I feel like I could be doing more. Sitting around here makes me feel like all I’m doing is wasting time. I want to do everything in my power to fight back.”

“I know, believe me I know,” Levi let out a sigh, “I just want all of this to end, but I know the only way that will happen is if we fight for it. So if you are up for a mission then so am I.”

I nodded and we made our way over to Pixis and Shadis. Hopefully, they have something for us. Anything, small, big, it doesn’t matter I’ll take it.


	3. Mission Planning

We walked up to Pixis and Shadis right as they finished talking to Erwin. “I’ll get a team together,” I heard Erwin say as he was walking away and instantly my ears perked up.

“A team? Are you planning on going on a mission?” I asked quickly before realizing I was interrupting. “Sorry,” I mumbled.

“It’s okay. Actually, you two would be perfect,” Erwin said, locking eyes with us. “It’s a small mission, but we need to be fast. We were planning on going tomorrow night. I figure we just need a small group for this one, but we should ask a few more people to join since the three of us might be a little too small. Well, that is if you want in?” Erwin asked.

I looked at Levi who gave me a nod, “Always.”

“Alright, let’s go to my room so I can fill you in and we’ll decide how many people we will need and who should come.” We followed him to his room and sat down on the spare mattress as he sat on his own.

“Alright, so what’s the mission?” Levi asked.

“Auruo got in touch with another group of exiles. Some of theirs have been captured and they are planning to move them to the correctional camps tomorrow night. We were planning on intercepting and freeing them.”

“Do we know how many guards?” I asked wondering how prepared we should be.

“Not exactly. The only details we know are that the ones captured were two red badges and a green. I’m not expecting too many guards for this, however, we don’t have enough information about it to be sure.”

“What do you mean?” Levi asked.

“Well, we don’t know if those three are the only ones they are planning on moving. So depending on that information we could be looking at 5 guards or 50,” Erwin sighed.

“So what's the plan?” I asked.

Erwin just shrugged. “We get a strong team together and hope for the best?” he suggested.

“What,” I said looking at him like he was a complete idiot. “What more should I expect from the man that got caught three separate times,” I mumbled with an exasperated sigh.

“He also escaped three separate times,” Levi whispered back to me.

“Well if you have a better idea then I’m all ears,” Erwin shrugged.

“Alright, then listen up,” I said leaning forward. “I think we should start with a small team with enough people to handle a few extra guards. However, if we are looking at more guards than we can fight rather than just wishing for the best I think we should have a backup team on standby. With your power, it will be easy to call in reinforcements.” I explained and Erwin looked at me rather impressed.

“Well, I’ll be damned, I should tell Pixis to run battle strategies by you more often. Maybe then I’ll stop getting caught,” he laughed.

“So who are you thinking about for the teams?” Levi asked, looking at me.

“Hmmm,” I paused taking a moment to think about it, “well starting with team A. We need someone who can survey the situation and give us intel without tipping off the guards that somethings going on. So probably Armin. He can then relay the information easily and let us know if we need the backup squad.

“Perfect,” Erwin said, writing Armin’s name down.

“I think us four could make it alone for team A. As for team B. I think we should have Hanji in case any of us or the other exiled get injured.”

“Done,” Erwin said, writing her name down.

“Jean and Marco should be there too.”

“Okay explain why?” Erwin asked.

“Well if there are too many the Jean can help us level the field by creating steam and making it harder for them to see. Marco could help incapacitate the guards by freezing them in place. With them together we could even have Marco cause a leak and have the floor filled with water so that Jean could send an electrical charge through it. Nothing too bad just enough to knock them unconscious.”

“Hmmm, I like it,” Erwin said writing their names down.

“I think we should have enough manpower with that. It’s best to keep the teams as small as possible, less of a likelihood that anyone will get caught.”

“I’m officially making you mission leader. I’ll go grab Pixis and Shadis and have them meet you at your room in 10 minutes. It was your idea you get everyone else together and we will fill them all in on the plan.” He said and we all stood up and headed out of his room. He went back to Pixis as Levi and I tracked down everyone else.

I felt Levi’s hand bump against mine and I smiled before lacing our fingers together. He gave my hand a light squeeze as we walked over to where Jean and Marco’s room is. I knocked on the wall and waited a moment for an answer. When there was none I moved the curtain to see if they were even in there. I opened it to see them making out. God, I couldn’t even tell them to get a room because technically they did.

“Hey Marco and dickwad,” I said letting them know I was there.

“Fuck off Jaeger we’re busy,” Jean said before leaning back in to kiss Marco.

I just gave him a shrug as I turned and headed to leave. “Fine, guess you don’t want to be a part of the mission.”

“Wait mission?” Jean practically jumped up to grab my arm so I wouldn’t leave.

“No it’s fine I’ll find someone else,” I said with a shrug giving Levi a smile as I turned my back to Jean.

“No hey come on Eren,” he said trying to play nice now.

“I thought you were busy,” I asked.

“Our schedule just freed up,” he said looking frantically between Marco and me. Marco was just trying not to laugh as I harassed his boyfriend.

“Well if you insist,” I shrugged, “meet me in our room in 10 minutes while I gather the others,” I said before turning to leave.

“He’s such an asshole sometimes,” I heard him mumbled under his breath.

“On second thought maybe we can do this without you. Marco, you’re still welcome though.”

“Wait shit, no, babe help me out,” he turned to Marco desperately.

“But I thought you were busy,” Marco said, giving him a teasing smile.

“Don’t you start,” he groaned.

“If you play nice then you can come,” I said before turning to leave.

“I will.”

“No, he won’t. He’s cursing you out in his head,” Levi whispered to me as we walked away.

I know, I don’t need a mind reader to tell me that. I thought as I looked around for Armin.

I knocked on the wall outside of his room. When there was no answer I moved the curtain and poked my head in. Nope, not here. I turned to walk away only to hear Armin laughing. I looked at Levi who was smiling. I just shook my head and turned back around walking into Armin’s room.

“I could have sworn he would have been in here,” I said with a flat tone playing along.

I felt a pair of hands on my shoulder as Armin appeared right before my eyes, “Gottcha!” he said happily.

“You’re right you really scared me good,” I said putting a hand over my chest and taking a deep breath trying to fake it.

“You’re a horrible actor,” Armin rolled his eyes before plopping down on his bed. “So what did you need?”

He’s going to be the hardest to convince. How am I going to word this? I thought of Levi giving him a glance. He just gave me a shrug back. Very helpful, I rolled my eyes.

“Well, we want you to come on a mission with us,” I said just straight out.

“What,” Armin said, shooting up to his feet, “I don’t know about this guys, you know how I get under pressure. It's hard for me to use my powers and I might mess up or I might ruin the whole mission. What if I get us all captured. What if-,”

“I’m going to stop you there,” I said placing a hand on his shoulder. “I trust you with my life Armin, I know you can do this. Besides this mission will be easy, I’ll explain everything once I get everyone together okay?” I said and I could tell that Armin was still a little worried about it all.

“You don’t have to worry, you won’t be involved in any fighting or anything like that,” Levi said reading my mind of where I was going next, “and if you want we can do a test run of your part so it will be easier when you actually have to do it.”

“Okay,” Armin said, taking a deep breath. “As long as I’m not fighting, and yes I think the test run will help,” he said, taking another deep breath calming himself down. I put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a smile.

“I believe in you. That’s why I put your name down for this mission,” I said and he looked genuinely surprised.

“You volunteered me?”

“Yup.” I watched a little smile appear on his face.

“In that case, I won’t let you down!” He said happily.

I nodded and we all headed out of the room. He headed to Levi and mine while we left to go track down Hanji. We headed towards her room to start. We knocked on the wall and were told to come in.

We moved the curtain and stepped in to see Eld sitting there next to her.

“I’ll be with you in just a second,” she said before placing a hand on Eld’s shoulder. She paused for a moment before letting out a depressive sigh.

“The damage is permanent isn’t it?” We heard Eld asked and instantly I felt my stomach drop.

“Afraid so,” she mumbled, “I was afraid of this.”

“It’s fine,” Eld shrugged, “Besides I already know sign language so if it comes to that then at least I’m prepared.”

“Well let’s hope it doesn’t come to that,” she said and he nodded before standing up to leave. He patted Levi and me on the shoulder and gave us a smile before walking past us.

“Wait, you can’t fix his vocal cords?” I asked running up to her after he left. I mean we all had a feeling it would lead to this. I’m just glad most of us took sign language lessons from him before it got to this point.

“About as much as I can fix your rheumatoid arthritis,” she shook her head. “Power backlash isn’t something I can just fix Eren. It's serious,” she let out a depressed sigh “I just wish we knew more about this sort of thing sooner.”

“Well we’ve never really had to use our powers this much until now,” Levi said sitting down next to her, “so there’s no way we could have known.”

“You’re right,” she took a deep breath before perking back up, “anyway is there something I can help you with?”

“Actually we need you to come to our room, we've got a mission we need to fill you in on,” I said and Hanji stood up instantly.

“About time I get to see some action, I swear I hardly ever get called on missions.”

“Which is a real shame since your powers are very useful when it comes to missions,” I said and Hanji’s eyes widened with joy.

“That's what I’ve been saying!”

We headed back to our room and saw everyone already gathered there. I had everyone take a seat before I started filling them in. After Pixis and Shadis listened to my idea the checked with everyone to make sure that they wanted to participate. When we were all in agreement he okayed it and told us to run a practice drill in the morning.

“Alright everyone, head to bed sounds like you’ve got a big day tomorrow,” Pixis said dismissing everyone. Before Pixis left he asked Levi and me if we were doing the rounds tonight again or if we needed him to take care of it.

“We’ve got it,” I said and he nodded.

“Let me know if you change your mind. If not then check in with me last,” he said before leaving.


	4. Checking In

It was getting pretty late and I was tired after everything that happened. Jean stayed back a minute to check on me after everyone else left. Levi left the room for a minute to talk to Marco and to give us some privacy.

Jean helped me take off my braces and unwrapped my arms before helping me see if there was any damage actually done, or if it was just aching from the previous damage. Alright press against my hand I did just that there was only a slight pain in my wrist still. He did a few more tests.

“It feels the same as before, I don’t think I did any damage.”

“This time,” Jean mumbled angrily, “for god’s sake Eren next time make sure you are wearing your braces.”

“I will.”

“That's what you said the last time, and the time after that, and the time after that. I swear if you do it again I’m going to smack the shit out of you.”

“It was my fault this time,” Levi said walking back in with Marco. “I’m the one that challenged him and I should have been paying more attention.”

“No, you’re not his babysitter,” Jean rolled his eyes, “sure it would be nice if you watched out for him too, but the responsibility doesn’t fall on you alone,” Jean said flicking his eyes over to me and glaring me down.

“Aren’t you being a little harsh on him babe,” Marco asked cutting in.

“Well excuse me if I want my best friend to be able to actually use his hands after all this finally ends,” he said and the room went quiet. “Can I talk to him alone? He asked a little quieter.

Marco and Levi both nodded and left the room again. “Look I know I’m being selfish by saying this, but I can’t help it. I want to marry Marco, I don’t think that’s much of a secret, but it has to be after all this is over right now is no time for a wedding. However when that day finally comes I want you to be my best man, and I want you to be able to actually raise a glass and make a toast. I want you to be able to actually move your hands and arms but if you keep this up then that won’t happen.”

I couldn’t help but smile. He’s trying to make it sound selfish to ignore that he actually cares about me. I opened my arms and I saw a look of horror appear on his face. “You get a hug for that one.”

“Why must you torture me?”

“Come on bring it in,” I said wrapping my arms around him. His arms reluctantly came up around me. I gave him a tight hug and when he thought I couldn’t see his face I saw a slight smile slip onto it. When I let go of him his arms lingered around me for an extra second before he switched his face back to an annoyed one.

“I hate when you do that,” he huffed.

“Sure you do,” I laughed before we stood up. We walked out and gave Marco and Levi a nod before walking them back to their room.

We did our check-in with them first since we were there. “So how are you guys feeling tonight?” I asked and Jean just rolled his eyes.

“You can skip all that emotional shit we’re fine,” he said before shoeing us out. We looked to Marco who gave us a nod that they were both doing fine before we headed out to make the rest of our rounds. We went to Annie and Mikasa’s room next. It was easier to check off the rooms with multiple people first.

We knocked and there was a long pause and some rustling on the other side of the curtain before we were told to come in.

We came into the room and saw Annie and Mikasa looking at us like they were a deer in headlights. “Sorry,” I said awkwardly.

“Looks like we’re interrupting,” Levi laughed before looking to me. “I think they are okay,” he said before walking out of the room.

“Yup we’re good,” Mikasa said awkwardly.

“Better than good,” Annie said with a smug smile.

“Good to know I’ll be leaving now,” I said before quickly turning and leaving. I didn’t want to know what they were doing even though I could probably guess.

“Christa and Ymir’s room? Since it’s right there?” Levi asked.

“Let’s hope we don’t run into the same issue.”

We walked up and Levi knocked on the door this time. There was no pause before we heard a “come in,” whispered from beyond the door.”

We walked in and saw Christa was asleep, her head was on Ymir’s chest. Ymir gave us a death glare, “I swear to god if you wake her up I’ll make every spirit I know haunt the living shit out of you.”

“Good to know,” I mumbled, “I’m assuming you two are doing fine?” I asked.

“Yes, and if that’s all you’re checking then get out,” she hissed.

“Will do, have a good night,” Levi smiled before grabbing my arm and leading me out of the room. “The last thing we want to do is piss her off,” I heard him mumbled to himself.

“Reiner and Berthold's or Connie and Sasha’s room?” I asked.

“Reiner and Berthold,” Levi said, “might as well get those two out of the way.”

“Good call.” We headed over to their room and knocked on the wall.

“Go away,” I heard Reiner say with an annoyed tone.

“He means come in,” I heard Berthold say in an apologetic tone.

We walked in moving the curtain and were met with a glare from Reiner and a smile from Berthold.

“We’re doing okay you guys can continue on with your rounds but thank you for checking in with the both of us,” Berthold said politely.

“Now fuck off,” Reiner mumbled turning his head to ignore us.

“Alright you too have a good night,” I said ignoring Reiner completely before turning and leaving. 

“I’m glad we got that out of the way,” Levi let out a sigh of relief. “Connie and Sasha?”

“Yup.”

We headed straight to their room and knocked on the door and were greeted with kindness instantly. “Come in,” Sasha said sweetly.

We walked in and she gave us a big smile. “Coming to do your nightly checks?” She asked.

“Yup. How are you guys feeling?” Levi answered.

“Well, honestly today was harder than usual.” Sasha let out a sigh dropping the smile.

“Yeah, I know we aren’t the only ones who are feeling it, it's been going around especially with some of the younger kids,” Connie said, avoiding any eye contact.

Sasha patted the mattress and we took a seat on the other end to talk with them. “Want to tell us what exactly you’ve been feeling?” Levi asked looking towards Sasha and then glancing over to Connie seeing if either of them wanted to answer.

“Well,” Sasha sighed, “we both have been talking and we have just been down in the dumps. It feels like things are never going to go back to how they were that things will just always be like this.” She said, looking to Connie to finish the rest of her though.

“We know it’s not easy to make a change, but it’s just that a part of us is starting to feel like it’s impossible,” he said, keeping his gaze at the floor.

“I mean, don’t worry we aren’t going to stop fighting,” Sasha said, placing her hand over Connie's, “it’s just a case of the blues getting to us.”

“I completely get that,” I said, giving her a little smile.

Connie’s head shot up as he looked at me, “You do?”

“Yup, I was feeling that way earlier,” I looked to Levi, “then he talked to me and I felt a little better, but I know it’s not always that easy to kick those feelings. I think everyone here has felt that way at least once.”

“It’s normal to feel that way. There’s nothing wrong with it.” Levi said specifically to Connie who looked embarrassed for feeling this way. “I have those thoughts nearly every day but everyone here keeps me fighting. I’m not fighting just for me but I’m fighting for both of you, for Eren for everyone.”

“It makes me feel better knowing that you guys feel that way too.” Connie smiled.

Sasha nodded in agreement. “Me too. It’s just good to know we aren’t alone with this.”

“Your logic is also very helpful cause you’re right. We are all fighting and we aren’t just fighting for ourselves but for everyone here, we are all in this situation together. We will all keep our heads high as we fight to better this world,” he said.

“Thanks, guys, I feel much better now,” Sasha said with a smile before looking to Connie to see if he felt better too.

“I’m feeling a lot better too. Thanks for coming in and checking on us.”

I smiled and leaned in and gave them both a hug and Levi did the same. We told them to have a good night before standing to leave. “Oh, before you go,” Sasha said, causing me to turn back around.

“Could you check on Hanna, she was upset earlier too.”

“Sure, we will head over to her room now,” I said and she smiled.

“Thanks,” she said before we left heading straight over to Hanna’s room.

We knocked on the wall and Hanna invited us in with a normal tone

“Hey, how are you feeling?” I asked walking in.

“I’m okay, I was feeling a little down earlier, but after talking with Franz I feel better now,” she smiled.

“That's good to hear,” I said but Levi seemed less convinced.

“You sure you’re doing okay?” he asked. Well if he’s asking that then he knows she’s not.

She just let a sad smile slip on her face as she let out a forced laugh “Nothing gets past your powers does it.”

“Nope.”

“Really, I’m okay. Sure I might be a little down still but it’s not something that can be fixed. I’ll feel better after a long rest,” she gave a more genuine smile this time.

“Okay,” Levi nodded. Well, she’s cleared Levi so she must be telling the truth now.

“Well, you know our door is always open if you need to talk,” I smiled.

“You mean your curtain,” she laughed.

“Same thing.” I rolled my eyes before patting her head, “get some sleep kiddo.”

“Will do,” she smiled before plopping down in her bed. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.” We headed out of the room and decided to check on Mina since she was right next door.

We walked up to Mina’s room and she was standing in the doorway. “I’m all good here guys,” she said before disappearing back into her room.

Levi just shrugged and started heading back down the hall. “That’s it?” I asked.

“Yup, she’s good. Her room is messy and she was embarrassed but other than that she’s good.”

“Oh, well should we check on Armin?”

“Yeah.”

We headed to Armin’s room and knocked. There was no answer. We knocked again, still no answer. I poked my head in and saw he was sleeping. I backed up and looked to Levi, “next room.”

“Franz is the last student,” he said and I nodded.

We walked over and knocked and we got a hesitant “come in.”

We walked in and saw him sitting there with his hand hidden behind his back. “How’s it going guys,” he said awkwardly, giving us a smile trying to hide something.

“Show me your hand,” Levi let out an exasperated sigh.

“I’d rather not,” he mumbled.

“It will hurt worse if I grab it,” Levi rolled his eyes.

Franz let out a sigh and showed us his hand. There was a really bad burn on it.

“What did I tell you about copying people's powers without letting anyone know,” Levi asked, rolling his eyes.

“Not to.”

“And what did you do?”

“Copied Jean’s power,” he sighed. “I had a good reason though.” He said quickly. Levi just raised an eyebrow. “I was trying to make Hanna feel better so I tried to do this really cool trick and I got her to smile and well it sorta worked.”

“She probably wasn’t too happy to see you burn yourself,” I said and he looked down at the ground.

“Well, actually she doesn’t know I burned myself. I hid my hand before she could see the damage.”

Levi just let out another sigh and gestured for him to follow us. We all walked towards Hanji’s room in awkward silence. We knocked on her door and she told us to come right in. Levi explained the situation to her while I stayed outside to stop the room from feeling overcrowded. When Levi came back out he gave me a smile, “Hanji said she doesn’t need a check-in that she’s feeling okay today. Also, Franz is okay mentally.”

“Good to know.”

We went around checking on the rest of the teachers. We checked in on Petra and Auruo. Petra was awake and Auruo was asleep so their check-in went quick. Erwin was doing okay so his check-in went pretty fast too. Mike was sleeping when we poked our head in. Eld wasn’t feeling the best I could only imagine it was from the bad news he got earlier. So we sat and talked with him for a little bit. He just needed a bit of a distraction.

When we finished with him we checked in on Molbit. He seemed okay too for the most part. I noticed him looking over his shoulder more and Levi gave my hand a squeeze. Meaning he would talk to me after about what I was thinking. When we left he did just that.

“You’re right he has been a little more paranoid recently. I think it’s because his job is risker since he’s out in the open. He doesn’t have a costume to hide behind and if they discover he’s the mole then he could be thrown in prison or worse,” Levi explained.

“Makes sense.” I never really thought about it that way.

We checked in with Mom and We both could tell she was a little down. Nothing too bad but we sat in with her and just listened to her and gave her some company. It seemed to help a little. When she started yawning we decided we should probably head out and let her get some rest. She pulled us both into a hu and gave us a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks for listening to me ramble for the last ten minutes.”

“Anytime,” I smiled.

“We love your rambling, well, when it isn’t a lecture,” Levi said and she rolled her eyes.

“Well, I wouldn't have to lecture you if you stopped doing dumb stuff.”

“That’s fair,” Levi laughed.

“Goodnight mom.”

“Goodnight boys.”

We went to check in with Shadis but he was already asleep. All that was left to do was check-in with Pixis and tell him we already made our rounds for the night. I was just hoping he was still awake; it has been about an hour since we last saw him, maybe longer. We headed to his room and knocked. “Come in.” Well, I guess that answers that.

We walked in and he greeted us with a smile. “You finished the rounds?”

“Yup,” I nodded. “You’re the last.”

“Well, I’m okay. How is everyone else?”

“A few people were feeling a little down, but nothing to worry about, Some people were already asleep and we couldn’t check in with them.” Levi said before taking a calming breath, “there was one injured but we sent him to Hanji.”

“Franz again?”

“Yeah.”

“Alright, good to hear everyone is okay. You two should get some rest, you've got a mission tomorrow.”

“Will do.” Levi smiled.

We wished him goodnight before heading back to our room. We got ready for bed and laid down together. “So babe how are you doing?” I asked turning to face Levi.

“I’m doing okay, how about you?”

“I’m doing okay too thanks to you,” I said scooting closer to him and laying my head on his chest. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close.

“Good, I’m glad,” he kissed me on the top of my head. “Now we should go to sleep. We've got a big day tomorrow.”

“You're right,” I said cuddling up to him, “goodnight babe.

“Goodnight.”

“I love you,” I said, closing my eyes.

“I love you too,” I heard his voice say before I felt myself start to fall asleep.


	5. Wake Up Call

I looked around at our field and everything was normal. Everything was easy. We didn’t have to fight for our freedom, our rights to live. Instead, we were just laying out under the stars without a care in the world. I looked next to me at Levi who gave me the softest smile. His hand caressed my face. “Will you marry-” My eyes opened and I looked around at the dusty old building. It was still dark. I let out an annoyed sigh.

“One day babe,” I heard Levi say as his hand came up to my cheek caressing it lightly before placing a kiss on my forehead. “It’s nice to see how eager you are to spend the rest of your life with me.”

“Of course I’m eager. It’s the only thing I want more than this war to be over.”

“I know, and I’m fighting like hell to make it happen.”

“So am I,” I said before getting out of bed and changing into some clean clothes, “now if you excuse me it’s time to get everyone together to practice the plan for tonight’s mission.” It was still really early in the morning, but the more practice we can get in before the real mission the better.

We got ready for the long day ahead of us. We headed into the makeshift bathrooms. That Petra, Marco made when we first got here. Erwin helped teleport in some supplies from Auruo’s contacts overseas and Petra and Marco made them actually work. I can’t even wrap my head around how but man am I sure glad they did.

We finished in the bathroom before heading back to our rooms getting changed into our mission costumes. I was about to head out of the room to gather everyone together when I felt my feet lift off the ground.

“Oh no you don’t,” Levi sighed before plopping me back down on our bed. “You are putting your wraps and braces on. I am not getting chewed out by mom again,” I heard him mumble.

“You’re right,” I laughed before watching him grab them. I put my arms out and let him wrap them. I winced when he pulled them tight.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, loosening them a bit. He finished with the wraps and pulled the braces over velcroing them into place. “Done.”

“Thanks babe,” I said, placing a kiss on his cheek.

“Who do you want to bother first?” he asked. I just gave him a devious smile and he rolled his eyes. “Why did I even bother asking.”

We walked to Jean and Marco’s room. I knocked on the wall and I heard a quiet “come in.”

“Don’t look so upset that they're awake,” Levi remarked watching me pout a little.

We walked in and saw Marco was sitting up but Jean was still peacefully sleeping. Oh, he’s still asleep. Perfect. I thought to Levi who just shook his head.

I gave Marco a nod and he slipped out of the bed and shook his head at me with a smile. “He’s going to burn you alive,” he whispered.

“It will be worth it,” I mumbled back before standing at the end of his bed. “3...2...1,” I counted down before bending my knees and jumping as high as I could before landing on him.

“Fucking hell Jeager,” Jean groaned hoarsely trying to get air back in his lungs after I knocked it all out of him.

“Rise and shine sleeping beauty,” I said, giving him a big kiss on the cheek. Instantly I made myself float to the ceiling to make my great escape. I instantly started running to the door. I turned the corner and hid behind the wall letting my feet back down on the floor.

“You’re fucking dead,” he said throwing the covers off of him and that’s when I realized he was only in his boxers. He stumbled out of bed and instantly tripped over some of the blankets. He hit the ground. When I heard the thud I poked my head back in the doorway as I felt the bright ball of heat fly past my head.

“You threw a fireball at me, you prick?” I yelled hiding back behind the wall making sure to stay out of the way in case he decided to do it again.

“You jumped on me!” He yelled back.

“Then I kissed you to make you feel better,” I said with a shit-eating grin even though I knew he couldn’t see it.

“Eat shit dickwad!”

“You first horse-face!”

“Alright babe,” I heard Marco’s voice cut through our yelling. “We have to get dressed.”

Jean let out a long drawn out sigh, “Fine.”

I walked back in and grabbed Levi’s hand before giving Jean a smug smile and Marco a thankful nod. We walked out to get everyone else up and ready to practice. We headed to Armin’s room next. He was already awake which wasn’t much of a surprise he went to bed quite early last night. Dang so much for his wake up surprise.

He was already in the process of getting ready so we headed towards the teachers' rooms to check in with Hanji and Erwin. We went to Hanji first since we knew she was probably still sleeping and needed time to get ready.

We knocked and we heard some words, but none that made sense. We poked our head in her room and saw her still sleeping. “Hanji?” Levi gently whispered.

“I’m awake,” she mumbled but when we looked at her she was practically still snoring.

“Are you sure?” He asked. There was no answer this time.

I couldn’t help but laugh a little before Levi rolled his eyes and walked up to her. He tapped her on the shoulder and her head shot up and her eyes opened and she looked really out of it.

“What’s up?” She asked, taking a deep breath and trying to act more awake than she really was.

“Time to wake up,” Levi smiled.

“I am awake,” she blinked trying to get her eyes to adjust, “I think,” she sat up and let out a yawn.

“We are getting everyone together for mission practice so we need you to get ready and we’re going to go wake Erwin,” I said and she nodded.

“Alright,” she was cut off by another yawn, “I’ll get ready.”

We left and headed to Erwin’s room. He was awake when we knocked. He was sitting up in his bed but he looked like he just woke up.

“Are we doing the thingy with whatstheirface before the thing?” Erwin asked. He definitely wasn’t awake yet.

Levi hesitated before giving him an answer wondering if what he asked actually made sense or not, “yes?”

“Okay, I’ll get ready you guys run the thingy by whatstheirnames so they can monitor. They also asked whatsherface to help with training,” he said letting out a yawn before getting up and stretching.

I just shrugged and headed out of his room. “Was I supposed to understand any of that?” Levi asked.

“Nope. Well let’s go find Whatshisname and whatshisname,” I laughed as Levi rolled his eyes. I started heading towards the common area since Pixis and Shadis are usually awake by this time. At least that’s who I assumed Erwin was talking about. I have no clue what he was trying to say by the end of his rambling, but I’m sure Pixis and Shadis can fill me in.

We saw them talking at the tables that Petra and Levi used their powers to make. They seemed to be discussing something. Pixis looked up and when he saw us walking towards him he gave me a smile and stood up. They walked over to us. “Are you ready to start practice?”

“Yes.”

“Alright, could you go make sure Sasha’s ready, I spoke with her this morning and she offered to help you guys with your practice. We also have three other volunteers who offered to play the role of the prisoners.” Pixis said. Ah, that must have been what Erwin was trying to say.

“Find Sasha and we will meet you at the course,” Shadis said and we all went in separate directions.

The course was a section of the building that was underground. It used to be a two-story underground parking garage but it has since changed into a large one-story arena. Petra Levi and I would usually set it up to match the mission layout if we had it, but recently it’s just been left as a vague layout with some obstacles around meant to represent buildings, cars, and other things that may be at the mission.

We didn’t know much about where we were going aside from it about a mile away from the prison in a closed-off forest area that was pretty isolated from the rest of the town. All we knew is that this place is where they were supposedly switching transport vehicles and we are there to intercept the prisoners.

As we were heading to Sasha and Connie’s room we actually ran into her on the way. “Oh, there you guys are. We are supposed to be heading to the course right?”

“Yeah, we were just coming to grab you,” I said and she smiled.

“Well, I’m right here so let’s go.”

We made our way to the basement and everyone was sitting around. Pixis and Shadis had pulled were sitting in the small lookout tower we made so people could monitor the course and help point out things we could improve on.

“Everyone ready?” I got everyone to come in a little closer so I could go over the plan again. Everyone huddled together except for Sasha who prepared to fight against us. She walked farther into the course until she disappeared from sight. I quickly went over the plan before breaking the huddle. “Alright start,” I whispered to our group.


	6. Mission Practice

“Alright start,” I whispered to the group before giving Pixis and Shadis a thumbs up. They nodded back and we got into position. Hanji Jean and Marco were all standing off to the side. Erwin made a portal on the other side of the course to simulate how we would actually be teleporting in. I walked in followed by Levi Armin and Erwin. We immediately hid behind some of the walls before giving Armin a nod.

“You got this,” I whispered. He took a deep breath before vanishing. We waited for 5 minutes before he reappeared to us. “Three prisoners and around 10 guards.” He said catching his breath.

“Okay, we shouldn’t need back up for this run-through,” I whispered.

Erwin nodded and opened a small portal before dropping the pebble in and making it collapse. The small pebble getting sent through to Hanji meant backup wasn’t needed. If there was a big portal that opened up that meant we needed backup. If no portal opened in the span of 10-15 minutes that meant we were captured. It was Levi’s Idea to have this added to the plan.

We had Armin tell us the rough layout as well as the rough positions of the “guards” and “prisoners.”

The prisoners were being held towards the center where there were the most guards. They were sitting on the ground facing the wall and were “tied up.” the rope was actually just loosely wrapped around them.

“Alright, Levi I want you to go in from the right and Erwin you go in from the left. I’ll go in from above. Levi focuses on your telekinesis, your empathic abilities and mind-reading won’t work on Sasha’s duplicates.”

“What about me?” Erwin asked, giving me a smile. That’s right, I was the team leader here. I had to direct everyone in how to go about each individual situation.

“I want you to focus on using your teleportation to either move them to Levi or my area of attack or use it to get them lost and out of the area of the fight.”

“Okay,” he nodded.

“Before we start an all-out 10 against 3 fight I want you to try and pick them off one by one without drawing attention.”

“Isn’t that impossible since they are all Sasha’s duplicates and she’ll see everything we are doing the second we start,” Levi asked.

“Yes and no, Sasha’s been directed to act as if each individual duplicate is their own person meaning that even if she sees us take out one of the guards as long as a duplicate doesn’t physically see or hear it happening she won’t attack.”

Levi nodded and we all got in positions. I used my power to make myself float to the ceiling. That was the only problem with this course. There was actually a ceiling. Where the mission will be taking place is outside and around trees meaning this will be a better tactic in the real mission more so than in this mock version.

I could see Levi and Erwin from my position, but I was very clearly out in the open in this layout. I could see the “prisoners.” It was Mina, Mom, and Connie. They all seemed to be whispering to each other and laughing. Glad they were taking this seriously. I could even see Connie flirting with one of Sasha’s doubles.

I just rolled my eyes and took a closer look at the layout of all of her doubles. Most of them were being watched by other doubles. I made eye contact with Levi and directed him on which double to take out and I nodded to Erwin directing him on which one to teleport away so they didn’t see Levi pulling them away. Erwin teleported the double that was watching the one Levi was going to take out to the very edge of the course right as Levi pulled the double towards him covering her mouth and choking her out until she “fell unconscious” which isn’t possible so Sasha just had her lay down and close her eyes.

We did that again and that's when the doubles started noticing that there weren't as many guards as there should be. They all became alert and closer together. That's when I gave Erwin and Levi a nod. We all rushed in at once. I used a gravity field that pulled 4 of the doubles together and Erwin teleported them away. Levi grabbed the last 2 doubles picking them up and causing them to fly towards him where he knocked them out with a punch. We quickly “untied” the “prisoners” before Erwin teleported us all back to the part of the course where Armin was hiding before teleporting us to the side of the course back with Hanji and the others. Sasha walked out of the course to join us for the feedback.

We heard a clap come from the top of the tower. It was Pixis. “That was a great first run. He said and I could tell there was a but coming. “However,” that's just a fancy but,” Eren, why were you up at the ceiling where you were visible to the enemy.”

“Well, for the actual mission, there will be a lot of trees so I plan to hide just above the trees giving me a better lookout position as well as hiding me from the enemy,” I explained.

“I see,” he said before looking to Hanji. “Would you like to do the honors of making this course a little more realistic.

“Definitely,” She said before disappearing into it.

I watched as Sasha stood up next to Pixis and Shadis. She must have been sitting on the floor up there. So that means the one standing next to us is just her double. “I’m so glad you had an explanation. I was so confused because every single one of my doubles could see you and I was wondering what the hell you were doing but I decided to just go with it in case you had a reason.

“Well this round we are going to change it up a little,” Shadis said before looking at Petra.

“I’m on it,” She said before walking into the course.

It makes sense that they wouldn’t leave it the same way for the second run through since we don’t know how the actual terrain will look aside from trees. They are probably going to change up everything this time how many doubles and how they are positioned. Also this time I have to be careful to stay out of sight since there will be actual shrubbery and leaves that I have to hide behind rather than just pretending that it's there.

“Alright we’re done,” Hanji and Petra came out after a few minutes.

“Ready to do another run?” Pixis asked, “Or should we give you guys a little break?”

“Give them a five-minute break I’ve got something I need to take care of,” Shadis said before walking down the steps of the tower.

I called everyone over to see if they had anything we needed to change as well as congratulate them on a good first run.

Shadis came back with something hidden behind his back and walked back up the tower. “Alright, Sasha’s going to start setting up, prisoners go with her double,” he announced before taking a seat. Sasha had disappeared from sight as her doubles entered back into the course.

We gave her a few minutes to set up before giving Pixis a thumbs up. “Alright everyone let's go,” I said. Again Hanji and the others stayed back while Erwin teleported our group into the course. We teleported in on the far side of the course again. Just by looking around, I can see that a lot has changed.

The whole course was overrun with greenery and the course itself has changed drastically. We all stayed low to the ground and I gave Armin the go-ahead. He nodded and vanished. It took him a little longer this time before returning. “There are about 20 guards and they are armed this time.” He said a little out of breath.

“Armed?” I asked him if I heard him correctly. I know Shadis handed something to Sasha, but would he really give her a gun.

“Paintball gun,” Levi corrected me reading both mine and Armin’s thoughts.

“Shit those things are painful,” I mumbled remembering how many times I’ve been shot with them already in other training exercises. “Alright, we have to treat them like they are real guns. Fill us in on the layout,” I said, turning to Armin.

Armin gave us the basic layout and told us where the guards were and where the prisoners were located. They weren’t in the center this time but towards the other side of the course. I stopped and thought for a moment last time it didn’t matter where Erwin teleported them on the course since it was all the same length from the center. However, the best way to go about this was to have him teleport guards to where we are hiding out currently meaning Armin is going to have to come with us or hide elsewhere. I looked up at Levi hoping for him to give me some advice.

“Your call,” Levi mumbled. He’s right I’m team leader on this one I have to be sure of every call I make.

“Armin, did you see any sections closer to the action that isn’t heavily guarded,” I asked and he stopped to think for a moment.

“If we go left we will hit a wall covered with vines. After that, there was a guard in each direction.”

“Okay, we will head up and when the wall is in sight we are going to call in group B. We might be able to take 20 people at once, but it’s always better safe than sorry.”

“Okay, let’s do it,” Erwin nodded.

We walked quietly, staying low to the ground in case any of the walls had small gaps in them. We moved quickly making sure to watch our steps and avoiding any sticks on the ground.

“There,” Armin pointed to the green wall.

“Alright, open the portal,” I whispered to Erwin.

He gave me a nod before opening a portal big enough for the others to walk through. They came through quietly and instantly crouched down behind the wall we were at.

“Twenty guards, they are armed with paintball guns,” I quickly filled this in. I had Armin fill them in with the rest of the information some of which have probably already changed such as guard locations.

“I’m going to take a closer look at the situation from above. Levi, I want you to watch my thoughts and relay the orders I give you to the others.”

“Okay,” he whispered. I took a deep breath and made myself weightless. I stayed close to the wall on my way up, stopping just above what was meant to be the tree line. I could see a few guards from where I was and the prisoners. This time there were 8 main guards keeping a close eye on the prisoners meaning there were at least 12 others wandering around. From where I could see I couldn’t see any of them.

I took a deep breath and raised myself a little higher. I made a mental note of where my team was before moving around at the top of the “tree line” I could see a majority of the course from here. I started looking for the missing guards. I managed to spot where all of the guards were except for 2. Which means either Armin miscounted or for some reason, I can’t see some of the guards.

Trusting Armin’s count I took a breath and made a mental note that we would need to be a little more careful since there is a chance that those two can catch us off guard.

“I moved back to a point where I knew Levi could read my mind. I did a double check just to be sure, asking him to give me a thumbs up if he can hear me, which he instantly did.

I nodded and planned out how to go about this. First things first should be to get the prisoners out of the line of fire in case we aren’t able to stealthily take out all of these guards and with 8 guards in the same place, I doubt we would be able too.

I looked to Levi and had him relay my thoughts onto the rest of the team. Marco should use his water manipulation to put a puddle of water by their feet but avoid the prisoners. Jean should then send a small electrical shock through the water. Nothing that will kill them, but enough to render them unconscious.

I watched Erwin wave to get my attention before using Sign language to ask “will it work on Sasha’s doubles.”

I looked back to Levi before having him relay that if not I have a backup plan. Sasha’s doubles don’t feel pain or have the same pain receptors however, I think she is watching to see if we do make an attack that would render a normal person incapacitated.

Marco and Jean got closer before going through with my plan. We watched as Jean added the current. One of the guards made eye contact with Jean just as he touched the water. She was about to shoot him with the paintball gun when she noticed the water at her feet. She nodded before having the doubles affected lay on the ground.

The victory was short-lived as we heard more guards start running towards us. I noticed the farthest guard was in sight of another one. We heard the guards start calling out to each other. That's when I instructed everyone to make a run for the prisoners as Levi filled them in as they ran.

They ran over to the prisoners and I dropped down right next to them. When Jean saw I was safe he gave us cover with a bunch of steam as Marco brought up a huge ice shield around us. The second we were behind the ice Erwin opened the portal.

We walked out of the portal at the end of the court and looked up at Pixis and Shadis letting them know we finished the mission. It was a chaotic run, but they’ve told us that if we didn’t need to fight then don’t. We were able to get out of there with fighting the least amount of guards. I was curious about how their feedback would sound.

“Very good,” I heard Pixis say.

I was almost caught off guard this was a far from perfect run. I should have made sure that we weren’t spotted taking out the guards

“There are a few things to work on, but you all need a break before the next run,” Shadis said before Sasha stood up.

“Sorry about that guys,” she said looking at us. “I don’t know if you noticed but two guards disappeared on you.

“Yeah, I noticed there were only 18. When Armin reported 20 What happened?”

“It hurt a little to do that many so I made the two farthest away disappear to stop my powers from backlashing,” she said with an apologetic shrug, “Sorry about that didn’t mean to confuse you.”

“It’s fine, are you doing okay?” I asked.

“Better now, but I definitely need a break,'' she said before plopping back down.

We’ve all been able to push our powers to the limits, but Sasha’s power is quite amazing. She’s trained herself to go past her limits and she now has a higher threshold for her power. Just three years ago she was only allowed 10 doubles but doing so would cause her pain, now she can go up to 20 but with the same pain, she had at 10.

She usually has at least one double present at all times now without any issues. The longest she’s gone with a double present nonstop is 3 months and the only reason she made it disappear was because no one knew which one was actually her. Now she only has a double during the day and during missions.

After our break, we did a couple more run-throughs with slightly different outcomes. Surprisingly there weren't any bad outcomes where one of us got shot or we lost a prisoner. It should make me feel better that we all had it down, but it only made me worry that if we didn’t make any mistakes here it means we might make mistakes during the actual mission.

We stopped halfway through the day before all heading to bed. It was important we all rest before our mission tonight even if it meant going to bed ridiculously early. We had to be as well-rested as possible and we had to give our powers a break after using them all day.

By the end of practice, most of us were feeling the pain of our powers being overused. We made sure to call it before the overuse could turn into backlash. When I laid down I could feel my wrists aching, but it was enough to manage. When we took off my braces and wraps I couldn’t tell if it felt good or if it hurt more.

I didn’t have time to figure it out. We laid down and I instantly closed my eyes. My hurry to go to sleep still didn’t stop me from pulling Levi close to me. “Love you,” I whispered, cuddling up to him.

“I love you too babe.”


	7. Code Names and Costumes

I woke up to Pixis lightly shaking my arm. “Time to get up,” he whispered quietly.

“Alright, I’ll go wake the rest of the team,” I let out a yawn before stretching out my back.

“Alright, I’m going to wake Shadis and we’re going to get ready just in case,” he mumbled.

“In case shit hits the fan?”

“No,” he paused for a moment, “well, yes.”

“Glad to hear you have faith in us,” I mumbled.

“I do have faith in your team,” he said placing a hand on my shoulder, “especially since they have a great leader, however, we don’t know a lot about the mission and those uncertainties have me worried. Shadis and I will be standing by if you need extra assistance. If it starts to go sideways have Erwin open a portal and we will be right there to back you up.”

“Thank you. We might need the help.”

He nodded before heading out of the room I turned back to Levi to wake him up when he opened his eyes. “I figured you guys wanted to talk privately,” he said before sitting up.

“Please tell me you got some sleep,” I said looking at him. He looked like he had been up for a little while.

“I did, I woke up about ten minutes ago.”

“Good,” I said standing up.

“I’m going to run and wake everyone up so they have time to get ready, start getting ready,” I told him.

“You sure you don’t want me to go? It’s going to take us a minute to get your braces on.”

“It’s going to take you longer to get all your knives in place,” I laughed.

“You have a point,” he nodded and I left the room.

By the time I came back, Levi was putting the last of his knives in their holsters. “Ready Malice Mind?” I asked, giving him a cheeky smile.

“Yes,” he rolled his eyes, “I still hate the name they gave me.”

“That’s why you should have made your own before the media could.”

“Okay Orbit,” he rolled his eyes. I just laughed before grabbing my “costume” before quickly throwing it on. Once it was on I sat down and had Levi help me put my braces on.

“So how many knives do you have like 20?”

“I have 40 actually,” he rolled his eyes.

“What the hell 40. How do you keep track of all of them?”

“Because I like knives,” his voice was deadpan but he gave me a smile. “And most of them come in pairs of two or sets of three. On each arm I have 4 knives on each leg I have 8 and on my torso, I have 16. He said pointing to each individual section showing me where they were before turning around and showing me the ones on his back.

He had a pair of small knives holstered in each boot. A holster on each thigh that held 2 small throwing knives. A holster looped into each side of his belt that hung one on either side of his hips that each held two large knives. In his back pockets, he had two medium-size knives holstered in each pocket. On his arms, he had two big knives strapped to each of the insides of his forearms and two medium-size knives holstered to his bicep.

Across his jacket was an x that mom sewed on. The front and back each held two sets of 3 small throwing knives. Also sewed into his jacket was a holster on each side of the bottom of the x on his back each holding one medium size knife. Lastly right down the middle of his back was a holster that contained two big knives that took up most of the length of his back.

I only have one knife on me in my boot since Levi convinced me that I might need it for whatever reason. Most of us carry a knife aside from Petra, Eld, Marco, Mina, and Hanna. They don’t like anything that violent. The only other people who don’t carry knives are Mikasa and Annie because they don’t really need them to do damage or protect themselves. I get having at least one knife on hand but 40 seems a bit excessive.

“Think whatever you want babe,” he shrugged, “it’s hard to deny that just one look at them when I’m using my power is enough to scare most people away.”

True, how could I forget the one time he did use them. The person who was trying to detain us nearly shit himself as he ran away. I have to admit seeing 40 knives floating around a person and all of them pointing at me, I would shit myself too.

“Exactly,” Levi laughed before giving me a hand helping me off the bed.

Now I wish my costume was cooler. I thought looking down at my braces. “Are you kidding, you have a cool magnet design on your sleeves and the solar system on the back of your shirt.” I just raised an eyebrow at him. “Besides, do you know how heavy these damn knives are? You lucked out.”I let out a sigh it was hard to argue there the less weight I have to lift with my power the better.

“Alright let’s get going. I’m sure everyone is just about ready.” We started heading to the common area.

“I wonder if anyone else upgraded their costumes recently,” he mumbled looking down at his own which was just recently upgraded to hold more knives. The recent addition being the x mom sewed into with new holsters.

“They probably had too after the last mission, remember most people's clothes got burned in the fires.”

“Oh I totally forgot about that,” Levi mumbled, completely stopping in his tracks.

The last mission we had gone on sideways if I could even call it that. It was just a flat out trap. We thought we had found a small correctional camp, but it was a decoy. The second we were inside they tried to blow the place up. Everyone made it out okay, but not without a few burns and wounds. If it wasn’t for Pixis’s quick thinking we might have lost a few people. Jean and Marco were able to keep most of the fire off of us while Pixis Levi and I held the rubble from crushing us. Pixis Made enough room for Connie to escape. He ran back here and told Erwin the situation. He portaled us out the second he found out.

“I don’t know how I could have forgotten about that,” Levi pulled me close and placed a kiss on my forehead.

“I mean, I don’t blame you, I'd rather forget about the whole thing too,” I took a deep breath before we continued walking.

When we made it to the common area almost everyone was there already. Erwin and Armin were still running a little late, but so far everyone else was here. I looked around at some of the new costumes and they looked pretty cool. Jean’s didn’t change much from the last design. His black jacket still had a flame design on it, but now his pants also matched. I looked at Marco whose jacket was still the same. It was a white jacket that had a design that looked like it was freezing over however he was wearing black jeans now instead of blue.

Pyro and Cryo. I thought to myself I have to remember to use everyone's code names. “Your codenames are so fucking similar,” Levi grumbled.

“Well if it’s too confusing just call me Pyro Maniac instead,’ he said proudly.

“No thanks, I’ll just stick with Pyro,” he groaned. Jean just shrugged.

I looked at Hanji, she was wearing a dark green jacket and dark brown pants. Her whole outfit had vines going across it that she made herself even her shoelaces were vines. I looked at her goggles and they were held together by vines. She now had a utility belt that she crafted out of vines. That was new.

“Hanji what's in those pouches?” I asked and she looked down. “This one has medical supplies and this one has animal food,” she said happily before leaning forward, “and it’s mother nature right now remember,” she whispered.

“Right sorry,” I mumbled. I'm already forgetting the code names. It should be easy to remember since everyone's outfits have their name on the back so we remember what to call them while on missions.

I looked at Pixis and his outfit has changed too. He wore a loose-fitting jacket that had purple lightning streaks going down the side of his sleeves that matched the color of his forcefields. He was also wearing wrist braces, however, his were a lot smaller than mine since his power backlash wasn’t as bad, but it did have a similar effect. “The protector,” I read the back of his jacket to myself trying to remember his code name if needed. I wasn’t sure if we were even going to need them yet but it was still good to keep the names in my head.

I looked at Pixis who had a new coat. If I could call it that. It was more like a hooded black cloak that went to his thighs. It was almost shaped like a jacket but it didn’t have a zipper. The design on it was two reaper scythes one on each sleeve. Mom really outdid herself with some of these designs. Under it, he was wearing a dark red shirt and normal black pants. “Agony,” I read his codename. Yeah, I remember him we gave him it since he couldn’t pick one. He wasn’t the biggest fan of it but he thought it wasn’t as bad as some of the other ones we gave him.

Armin and Erwin had made their way to us. Both of their costumes were the same since they weren’t involved in the fire. “Armin was wearing all white since it helps him disappear better. I remember his codename since Mikasa and I gave it to him “ghost.”

Lastly Erwin. His costume is one of my favorites since’s it’s a giant fuck you to the government. He’s been captured three times. Two of the three times he’s brought back a souvenir after teleporting himself out of there. The first time it was the orange prison jumpsuit pants. The second time he brought back a pair of handcuffs that he modified with Petra’s help. He made them able to be taken off whenever he wanted as well as added a heavy-duty long-chain onto them that he uses in hand to hand combat. When not in use the chain is wrapped around his arms securely so it doesn’t rattle. Lastly, his jacket is the classic black and white stripes as seen in most prison movies.

His codename is hard to forget since the media gave him it. The Escapist they call him. A man who can’t be contained. I swear at least two of those three times he got captured on purpose. He hasn’t tried to get captured again since recently they haven’t been taking many prisoners. Now they are just shooting.

“Alright, it’s about time you guys teleport out,” Pixis said looking at me. “Your team leader will take good care of you. Stay safe out there. If you need back up you know what to do,” Pixis said the last part directly to me.

“Will do.” I nodded before looking at my team, “alright guys masks on.”

I watched as everyone put their masks on. They were cheap fabric masks that covered our mouth and nose. Levi, Erwin, and mine were solid black. Armin’s was black but with the word BOO on it. Hanji was actually made out of vines and flowers. Marco’s was light blue and Jean’s was red.

Shadis and Pixis left theirs off, for now, I looked around and made sure everyone's face was covered. “Okay, we got this just like we practiced.” I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, “alright Escapist open the portal.”


	8. The Mission

The second the portal opened I took a deep breath and walked through staying as low to the ground as possible. I did a quick check to make sure the coast was clear before sticking my arm back through and gesturing for them to come through.

Levi was the first one through followed by Armin and lastly Erwin who closed the portal. “Ghost, you’re up,” I whispered.

He nodded and took a deep breath before disappearing. Everything is going to go fine. This is just like practice. I kept thinking to myself, but it’s not. This is nothing like practice. This is real. The second I walked through the portal I felt how the air shifted. This was real, real guns, real people real lives on the line. We aren’t ready.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, “we’ve got this babe,” Levi whispered into my ear.

You’re right I’m overthinking this. I need to stay calm. Everyone is relying on me to get us through this mission safely. I can’t do that if I’m panicking. I took a deep breath and gave Levi a nod. “We got this,” I repeated back to him.

I was starting to get nervous after a few more minutes had passed and Armin still hadn’t come back. During practice, it never took him this long. Could he have gotten lost in the forest? Or worse could he have been captured?

“I doubt it we would hear more yelling if that were the case,” Levi assured me.

He was right. It was mostly quiet where we were. I mean if I really concentrated and ignored the sound of the leaves rustling I could make out faint talking in the distance. Not enough to know what was being said, but enough to know it wasn’t yelling.

Maybe I should go up and check to see what’s going on? I thought I only wanted Levi to answer. The last thing I needed was Erwin to see me so worried. He might think I’m not cut out to lead.

“Give him a few more minutes.” I nodded and we did just that. Just as I was really starting to panic Armin reappeared next to us. He looked as panicked as I felt.

“We need the others,” he whispered frantically, “I lost count after 30.”

“And the prisoners?”

“Haven’t arrived yet, but they should be coming soon. They are switching vehicles just a little up the road.” I nodded.

“Escapist, open the portal for back up,” I instructed

He opened it and Jean was the first on out Marco was right behind him and lastly Hanji. Erwin closed the portal behind them before turning to me, “Pixis and Shadis can also back us up if we need.”

“I know, I’m going to take a look and decide what we need to do,” I said before looking at Levi. “Give them my instructions.”

I took a deep breath and lifted myself up above the trees, being careful not to hit too many branches and leaves as I made my way to the top of them.

I took it slow, trying my best to see through the trees moving very few of them out of the way as possible to keep myself fully covered. I saw where most of the light was coming from. I took a look around the area we were in. We needed to move closer.

I instructed Levi on where to lead the team. I had them stop just a little way behind the light as I moved a little closer to try and see where the rest of the guards were. Most of the guards were just standing around talking. Some were actually keeping an eye out. Most of the guards were standing within sight of each other. It would be hard to pick any off. We are probably going to have to go in quickly taking out as many guards as possible.

I looked closer at the ground and saw it would be even harder to get some of them. Part of the ground where the guards were standing on was concrete whereas others were standing on dirt. The dirt would make it easier to hide the water but concrete would be obvious that something was happening.

No, we have to go about this another way. I carefully lowered myself back down to my team to talk about the strategies. “I have two ideas. One of them is bound to work,” I whispered.

“Throw em out there,” Jean said, leaning in to hear me better.

“Cryo, how much water do you have on you?” I asked but Levi cut me off before he could answer.

“Not enough for that plan, try the other plan it sounds easier to pull off.”

He had a point I mean to make it look like it was raining on them and then shocking them through the water that gathered on the ground did seem a bit out there. “Alright, Pyro, Cryo, and Escapist I’m going to need all three of you on this one.”

“Just tell me what I have to do,” Erwin nodded.

“Pyro when that car drops off the prisoners I need you to make as much steam as possible.”

“But won’t they realize that it’s hot?” Jean asked and I nodded.

“That’s where Cryo comes in,” I said before turning to him. “I need you to make as much mist as possible and make it cold enough to cancel out the heat from Jean’s steam. Can you do that?” I asked.

“I do want Pyro to be back a little further behind Cryo so the mist hits them more than anything. However, I don’t want you guys to just stop at that section. I want you to make this forest as misty as you can.

“Why not just have Cryo make the mist?” Hanji asked.

“I don’t think we have enough water and even if we do the thicker and harder to see the better,” I explained and she seemed to agree.

“Do you think you guys can pull it off?” I asked Marco.

“In theory, it should work,” he shrugged before looking at Jean.

“Should we do a little practice right now while you fill Escapist in on his part?” Jean suggested.

“Yes,” I said before turning to Erwin.

They backed up to test it out as I spoke to him. “When the mist hits them I need you to start teleporting people away but when you do make sure they teleport somewhere in the mist to keep them confused and to stop them from realizing that they’ve been teleported. Do you think you can do that?”

“I can definitely do that,” he smiled before looking at Hanji and Levi. “What about them?

“I’ve got something special for them to do.

“Mother Nature, your part in this is going to be the most crucial.”

“I’m ready,” she said happily.

“I need you to tie vines to everyone so we don’t get lost in the mist. The second the mist covers the area I need you to get yourself and Armin into the trees and keep a tight grip on all of those vines. The second part of your part will come together with Malice Mind’s.” I said gesturing for Levi to listen even though he already could hear the whole plan in my thoughts.

“He’s going to grab the prisoners and lift them up to you and when he does that I need you to give a tug on all the vines. The second I feel the tug I’ll go and lift everyone up into the trees and I’ll have Escapist teleport us out.”

“Won’t that put too much strain on your powers?” She asked.

“I should be fine as long as we work fast.”

“What about the guards that are going to be next to the prisoners?” She asked.

“I’ll take care of them.”

I made sure everyone could hear me as I got all of their attention. “If things start to hit the fan, pull on your vine. Mother nature any vine that you feel a tug on brings them up to the treetops.”

“Will do,” she nodded.

“What’s plan B?” Armin asked and I saw everyone look at me.

“ Depends on what stage it goes wrong, but if it goes wrong and we get caught we call in Pixis and Shadis and fight like hell.” I expected them to look at me with more panic in their eyes but instead, they seemed to be okay with that answer. How can they be okay with it? I can’t let them down. I need to come up with something. Anything.

I didn’t have anything else planned out and it sounds like I don’t have time to think of anything else. The car just pulled up. I looked to Marco and Jean who gave a little nod as they started to make the steam and mist. The second they started Hanji slapped a vine on everyone’s wrist.

They worked fast and soon there was so much mist that it was nearly impossible to see anything. I lifted myself off the ground and stayed close to the treetops. Levi did the same. We saw Hanji and Armin waiting at the top. Levi and I made our way over to where the car had brought out the prisoners. I could barely see anything and then my eyes landed on 15 people all huddled together 10 with helmets and 5 without.

There were 5 prisoners instead of three. That explains all the guards, at least one of them has to be a blue badge with how heavily armed these guards are.

We lowered ourselves next to the group of people using the mist as cover. We stayed low to the ground. I saw two guards towards the end of the groups of people as they blindly tried to make their way to the other car. I used my power to make one of each of their feet heavy. Both of them tripped and I could hear as they cursed at each other for stepping on each other's foot and tripping them up.

It was hard to hear much of anything. Everyone was yelling out trying to find each other until I heard someone from the very back yell. “Wait a minute this mist isn’t a coincidence this is an attack there must be exiled around!”

Shit things are going to hell. I looked at Levi and decided that we don’t have time to do this slow anymore. I quickly lifted myself up to the treetops and met up with Hanji. “Which one is escapist’s vine?”

“This one,” she said and I followed it down to where Erwin was.

I lowered myself down right in front of him. “Change of plan come with me,” I said before lifting us both up to the treetops.

I took one look at Hanji and her vines and I knew which one was Levi’s since he was the only one in that direction. I brought Erwin down to where Levi was. “Before they decided the prisoners aren’t worth the hassle I need you to teleport the guards away from them, but all at once.

“They are surrounding the prisoners. I can’t teleport them without teleporting the prisoners as well. I looked to Levi for a moment to fill him in on my plan and he nodded.

“We can get them away but we need to do this as fast as possible. The second they move they need to teleport. Don’t worry about teleporting them into the mist, just get them as far away as possible so they can’t alert anyone.”

“Okay, ready when you are.”

I looked at Levi. I'm going to count to three so we go at the same time. I thought to him. One-

“Shoot the prisoners before they can escape,” I heard a guard yell.

Three! There was no time. I instantly used my power to create a gravity field sending the group of guards flying towards it. Instantly Erwin opened a portal right before the gravity field and they were gone just like that.

Levi, on the other hand, had instantly used his powers to grab the prisoners and pull them up into the trees. I could already feel my wrists start to ache. That gravity field was a strong one and it took a lot out of me. We are almost done though. I felt Hanji tug on the vine to let us know the prisoners were up there. I lifted Erwin and myself up to the treetops. Levi was struggling to hold that many people up and I knew I had to hurry. I left Erwin up there before going down to grab Jean and Marco.

When I dropped down next to them they knew it was time to go. I lifted them up and Levi had Erwin open the portal Levi and the prisoners went through first. Next was Armin and Hanji. Erwin waited for us to make it to the portal before going through. We went through right after him and the portal closed after us.

My knees gave out the second I dropped through the portal and my but hit the ground. We were back in the common area of the old building. We did it! We actually did it!

I took a deep breath before looking around. A few of the prisoners were already injured and Hanji was looking at them. They were still cuffed and I noticed Armin was missing. Before I could say anything Levi put his hand on my shoulder.

“He went to grab Mikasa so she could break the cuffs,” He said sitting on the floor next to me.

“Everyone made it back safe.”

“Yup, all because of you,” he said leaning his head on my shoulder. Armin came back with Mikasa who was in sweats and a baggy T-shirt. She looked like the devil herself had climbed out of hell.

“Hey you don’t exactly look like prince charming when you wake up either,” Levi nudged me.

“You tell me I do though,” I laughed.

“Yeah but that doesn’t make it true,” he said back and I put my hand to my chest.

“How rude.”

“How’re your arms?” he asked but I could tell he already knew the answer he held worry in his eyes as his hand lightly touched my brace.

“It’s been worse. I don’t think there’s any permanent damage this time it’s just sore,” I said quietly.

I looked back upright as Mikasa was breaking off the last pair of cuffs. “There. Now I’m going back to bed,” she said before heading back towards her room.

“Are you the one that saved us?” I heard the younger boy ask Erwin. He refused to let Hanji take a look at his wounds and he seemed to be the one who was beaten up the most.

“The one you’re looking for is over there,” he said pointing to me.

He should take some of the credit, everyone here should. It wasn't just me who saved them, it was a team effort.

“Babe, if it wasn’t for your plan and your quick thinking we might not have.”


	9. The Prisoners

The younger boy looked over at us. Eren tried to pick himself up off the floor to get up and greet him. He put his hands down and his wrists wouldn't support his weight and he ended up plopping right back down on his ass. Well so much for that. I tried to stop myself from laughing at his misery but I could tell he heard me when he glared at me. I just put my head on his shoulder and gave him a smile. He and I both knew he would be pushing it with his powers. At least they are just sore and there's no permanent damage… this time.

“You’re the one that saved us?”

“Well it was more of a team effort,” Eren gave him a smile.

“Thank you, you saved their lives” he smiled back, “I’m Aleixo. My exiled name is Shields. Those are my sisters,” he said pointing at the two young girls. “It was my fault we were captured. I wasn’t strong enough to protect them.”

“Hey don’t beat yourself up about it. No one is prepared for any of this,” Eren tried to comfort him a little but he cut him off. His emotions were all over the place.

“You don’t understand, I could have got them killed. They were doing fine until I made a noise, I tripped on a tree root and fell into a bush. When we were spotted I could only hold the guards off for so long. When my shields fell they held a gun to their heads. I’m supposed to protect them but instead, I’m the reason they almost died.” His voice came out rushed and panicked as he relived what happened.

His power as it looks from his memory is a barrier or a shield that deflects anything thrown at it, but it doesn’t seem to last very long. From the looks of it, he must be the green badge.

His thoughts were swirling and I could barely follow them but I caught a little bit. I was able to see why he felt so responsible. He’s always had to look out for his sister and keep them safe. Looks like he came from an abusive family he was used to taking hits for them and protecting them from everything he could. That’s a big job for a 19-year-old boy. No wonder his black and blue eye and bloody nose didn’t even phase him, he's endured much worse.

“Look, kid,” I spoke up, “it’s not your fault. Things happen and people get hurt, but none of this is your fault. You’re part of the other resistance group right?” Alexio nodded. “Then you know that the only people who are at fault are the ones who made these laws. If these laws were never put in place then we wouldn’t be in this mess too begin with.”

“You’re right,” He let out a sigh, “it’s just I’m scared. What if one of these times I’m not able to protect them?”

“Thoughts like that will do nothing but paralyze you in a never-ending loop of what if’s. I have to stop myself every day from asking those very questions because if I did I’d never stop.” I gave Eren’s hand a squeeze. “Imma let you in on a little secret.” I leaned in a little and he did the same. “Look around this room at all the people here. What do you think they are feeling right now?”

He looked at Jean and Marco who were smiling and talking, “They look happy,” he said pointing to them.

“Well, they are both terrified that one time one of them won’t come home and on missions, they refuse to be separated because of that. Try someone else,” I said trying to make a point.

He looked at Hanji who was treating the older man's injuries, “she seems really nice, she’s very calm.”

“She’s really scared that one of these times her power isn’t going to work when she needs it to and someone will die on her watch. What about him?” I asked, pointing to Erwin who was talking to the older woman.

“He seems brave.”

“He’s been captured three times and is afraid that the next time he will be shot on sight. Anyone else?”

“Well he looks scary,” he said pointing to Shadis.

“He acts strict but it’s to hide from the fact that he’s terrified of losing any of us.”

“So?”

“So all of us might look brave and calm, but each and every one of us are terrified on the inside. We are all scared about what could happen, but we know that the only way to end this is to keep on fighting until we get our rights or until we can’t fight anymore.”

“I understand,” he took a deep breath. Before we could say anything else his sisters ran up and practically tackled him.

“You need to go to her and get your wounds looked at.” One of the girls who was practically radiating said.

“Yeah they look really back,” the other sister who seemed a lot darker and gloomy said.

“Fine if it gets you to stop bugging me,” he mumbled before heading over to Hanji.

“You’re the one who saved us right?” the radiant girl asked Eren.

“It was a team effort,” he said again with an awkward smile.

“I’m Ciana,” she said happily, “this is Zella,” she said pointing to her gloomy sister. “All of your powers were so cool they were like bang bam pow! And now we’re safe!” she bounced.

“Yeah, thanks for the save,” her sister mumbled.

“I wish my power was that cool.”

“I’m sure your power is just as awesome,” Eren said.

“Nah, I can only shoot beams of light from my hand, oh and I glow in the dark. I mean my sister’s powers way cooler than mine! She can turn herself into a walking shadow. She's really great at keeping us all safe at night!” Seems they are the red badges.

“Both of your powers sound really amazing!” Eren said matching her level of excitement.

“They do? I mean they are nothing compared to you guys. I couldn’t tell a lot of what was happening but one minute I was chained up in a cloud of mist the next I was floating and then I was here!” She spoke quickly and even Eren had a hard time following her excited ramblings. She reminded me of a more extreme version of Hanji.

I couldn’t help but smile. “You remind me of my friend,” I mumbled to her.

“Really. Maybe that means we can be friends too!” She squealed. Help. One Hanji is enough. This 15-year-old girl is going to kill me.

“Alright I got healed now you can stop pestering these guys,” her brother came back right on time. I’m saved.

“Awe, but I was just making some new friends,” she pouted.

“Well no time, that guy over there is going to teleport us back to the rest of our group,” he said pointing at Erwin.

They started heading over to Erwin but the other twin stayed back for a second. “Sorry about my sister she’s just a bit overwhelmed and she processes that by being annoyingly excited about every little thing. Anyway if you ever need to get in touch with us our exiled names are Yin and Yang. I’m Yin.” she said before heading over to Erwin who teleported them off.

I helped Eren to his feet so he wouldn’t have to use his wrists to get up and we headed over to greet the other two. They don’t look like exiles, they look like normal civilians. We headed over to the woman first since she had just finished talking to Erwin.

“Hello I’m Levi, and this is Eren,” I introduced us.

“I’m Keiani,” she said awkwardly.

“Do you know why you were captured?” Normally I wouldn’t ask, but she didn’t look like she should be here. Maybe she’s the blue badge or could it be the older guy? Neither of them really looked like they should be here. Maybe they went into a building they weren’t supposed to?

“I haven’t the faintest idea one minute I was asleep in bed the next I was being dragged out of my house with a hand over my mouth.” I froze for a moment. Dragged out of her home. I knew the government was doing shady things, but this?

“Pardon me asking, but do you know what badge color you are?” Eren asked. He was thinking the same thing as me.

“I’m a blue badge,” she said quietly. And I felt my blood run cold.

Eren and I looked at each other and we both knew what she was going to say before she said it, but that didn't stop her answer from shocking us to our core. Eren looked at me thinking the same thing that I was and I nodded to confirm that we were on the same page.

“Thank you,” Eren said quietly. We walked away and we started heading to the other man.

“You want to bet he’s going to say the same thing?” I asked.

“I hope not, but I’m afraid he will,” Eren mumbled.

We walked up and introduced ourselves trying to hide our growing panic. “I’m Eren and this is Levi,” Eren started this time.

“My name is Issa.”

“Do you know why you were captured?” Eren asked.

“No clue,” I was in my apartment heading to the kitchen for a midnight snack when people busted into my front door and held me at gunpoint. They told me I had to come peacefully or they would shoot me on sight.”

“What badge are you?” I asked.

“Blue,” he mumbled.

“Thank you,” I said before walking up to Pixis.

He was talking with Shadis. When he saw us walking up to him he gave us a big smile “Job well-done boys.”

What I’m about to say is going to wipe that smile right off his face. “We have a big problem.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Red Badge Zella: Zella’s powers are Shadow emission. She can turn herself into a walking shadow and there is a small radius around her that can be affected by this shadow too. Radius is about a 10-foot circumference. She can use her powers during the night to make it impossible for her and her team to be seen in the shadows of the night or in dark buildings. In direct light, her power isn’t as strong and she can’t fully hide herself in the shadows. Her skin also reflects no light at all. (Age 15 Identical twin to Ciana Exile)
> 
> Red Badge Ciana: Ciana’s powers are Light emissions. She can turn herself into a walking light like a light bulb or shoot beams of lights from her hands like a flashlight. She can also use her lights to blind people. During the night her skin glows in the dark slightly and she can still be seen even in the pitch darkness. During the day her light has a harder time showing, but her skin becomes reflected and she can make the sun’s light reflect off her skin into someone's eyes. (Age 15 Identical twin to Zella Exile)
> 
> Green Badge Aleixo: Alexio has deflections shields. He can create a wall or shield-like barrier in front of someone or himself and for a 5-minute duration, anything done to the shield will deflect off of it. (Age 19 Older brother to Zella and Ciana Exile)
> 
> Blue Badge Keiani: Keiani has bone manipulation. She can manipulate her own bones. She can generate new bone mass as well as project bones out of her skin. She also can rearrange her own bones without causing any physical harm to her body. (Age 26 random civilian)
> 
> Blue Badge Issa: Issa has Memory manipulation, the ability to erase, enhance, or even change someone's memories. (Age 31 random civilian)


	10. Family Meeting

“What do you mean?” Pixis asked. “What’s wrong?”

“We need to call a “family” meeting.” Pixis’s face got serious as he turned to Shadis. “Wake them up.”

Shadis ran to the room and everyone headed up to the top floor. It was a big room with nothing but a long table and a ton of chairs that Petra and I had made.

Eren and I sat at the head of the table this time since we were the ones that called the meeting. We waited for everyone to finish stumbling in. Everyone looked half asleep as they took their seats. We had the two new people take a seat off to the side. When Shadis came in and gave us a nod we knew everyone was here.

I stood up to speak but the second I tried I was cut off. “What’s so important that you had to wake everyone up?” Reiner asked he was trying to sound pissed, but I could tell he was worried. We hardly ever have to call family meetings. The last time we had to call one was when they implemented the badge system.

“While talking to the people we rescued Eren and I realized something that you are going to all want to hear.” I looked at the two guests who were sitting off to the side to see if they would be willing to come up and talk, but they both seemed too nervous. I just took a breath and continued.

“There were two people who we rescued who didn’t seem like they belonged; they weren’t exiles and they didn't seem like they were rebelling in any way. So we asked them why they got captured.”

Eren stood up as I took a breath, “They were both taken from their homes in the middle of the night. Both of them are blue badges. They are taking out any people who are potentially threatening before they even do anything.” I heard whispers throughout the room.

“The government is now kidnapping it’s citizens in the middle of the night and shipping them off to correctional camps,” I started back up again, "or worse, one of the people we rescued was threatened to be shot if he resisted. It makes me wonder how many people were shot in their own homes because of this.” I asked specifically looking at Auruo, Molbit, and Mom. I was going to talk with them privately later to try and figure out if they could find out how many times this has happened. Auruo could help us get in contact with allies that might know whereas Molbit and Mom could figure out through their roles as spies.

The room roared with everyone's frustration as they all expressed how disturbed this made them.

“I knew they were all stupid but this... this is insane!” Ymir shouted.

“They are killing innocent people!” Hanna yelled.

“How could they do this? Do they not have any remorse?” I heard Mom say.

“That’s horrible,” Christa shook her head.

“They really are some sick fucks,” Annie closed her eyes and put a hand over her face.

“We have to do something about this!” Jean said, shooting to his feet.

They all started yelling in Harmony. I could tell Eren wasn't really able to follow along with the chaos that roared across the room. I, on the other hand, was able to follow a little better.

“Alright. Everyone quiet down please!” Pixis spoke up, “I know this all sounds troubling and I know we all want to do something about it, but as of right now we need to get more information before we can,” he said trying to calm everyone down. “As for right now, the meeting is over you should all go back to bed. We will be discussing this more in the days to come.”

Everyone slowly cleared out of the room and I could feel the anger coming off of most of them still, though I could be blinded by my own rage as well. “Nice catch,” Pixis said, walking up to Eren and I. “We would have never realized this was happening if it weren’t for you two. I’ll have Auruo look into it in the morning.”

“And tonight?” I asked.

“Tonight, you rest,” he said, putting a hand on my shoulder, “you guys pulled off an amazing mission, you saved five people, and found new information. You’ve done enough for tonight, now it’s time for you to get some sleep you deserve.”

“And them?” Eren asked, looking towards the two civilians who we couldn’t exactly just send back to their homes as if nothing happened.

“I’m going to have Erwin teleport them back home and let them grab a few things. Then we will decide what to do from there until we figure it out we will have them stay here.”

It was hard to argue with him; we both just agreed and headed back to our room. Mom was waiting for us just by the door. We walked into the room and had her follow us in. The second we were inside the room she pulled us both into a group hug. I could feel how tired she was.

“I’m so proud of you boys. You saved another group of people,” she said holding us tight. She kept her face out of our sight as she hugged us and I knew she was tearing up. She had been sitting up all night just waiting and worrying about us. Every time we went out on a mission she was scared we wouldn’t come back and every time we did she would tell us how proud she is and how much she loves us.

She cleared her throat and let us go before standing up straight and looking at us, “anyway I should let you boys get some sleep,” she said ruffling our hair. I could see the red tint to her eyes from crying and the bags under them.

“Thanks, mom,” Eren said, giving her a smile.

“We love you mom,” I said, giving her another hug to calm her nerves. Eren joined in and I felt her muscles relax a little.

“I love you too boy’s,” I could hear the smile in her voice. “I’m going to head back to my room and get some sleep,” she said before placing a kiss on each of our foreheads before heading out.

Eren’s smile dropped as soon as she left the room. He turned to me with worry in his eyes. Before he could even speak I just pulled him into a hug, “I know babe, I’m scared too,” I whispered.

“They were just ripped from their homes, how could they treat people like that.” Eren’s voice cracked as he tried to hold back his tears. “I knew they hated us, but them- they didn’t do anything. They are innocent people trying to live their lives and they could have been killed for just existing.”

All of the muscles in his body were tensed up and his hands were balled into fists. I could feel the air around us growing heavier by the second. This wasn’t just sadness and fear anymore this is pure rage.

“We never asked for this! For any of it! Do they think we want to be traumatized so badly that our bodies think that if they don’t adapt in some way that we will die!” his voice rose and before I could try and calm him down to stop him from waking anyone up, or worse destroying half the building his voice got really quiet. “I never wanted any of this,” I could barely make out what he whispered under his breath.

“Baby,” I spoke softly, looking into his glazed over watery eyes. I watched as he blinked a few times and looked up at me as he snapped out of his thoughts.

“Sorry,” he mumbled out.

Our curtain flew open. Our room was closest to theirs and I knew they had heard Eren. I was waiting for them to chew us out for being too loud and keeping them up, but Jean just walked straight in the room and up to Eren before throwing his arms around him.

“I thought you hated hugs,” Eren whispered to him.

“I do, but you like them and it sounds like you need one right now,” he mumbled before sitting Eren down on the bed so we could all talk. Marco awkwardly stood in the doorway. He wasn’t the type to just barge on in without being sure he was welcome. I gave him a nod and he came closer. We all sat down on the bed and talked about what had happened.

I knew Jean and Marco were worried about the whole ordeal too but it seems they were just as shocked as me to hear Eren’s outburst. He hardly ever raises his voice unless he’s arguing with Jean but this was different.

After Jean was sure Eren was okay they headed back to their room. With not a single insult from Jean. He must really be worried about him, as am I. I looked at Eren when they left and he looked absolutely wiped. He could barely keep his eyes open and his wrists were sore from the long night as well as the braces being on too long.

“Here babe let me free you,” I teased and he held out his arms with a small smile.

“Please,” he mumbled.

I carefully took them off and put them aside. “Let’s get ready for bed before you decide to pass out in your costume.”

“I’m not even,” he yawned, “that tired.”

“Yeah okay,” I rolled my eyes helping him to his feet which he swayed a little on.

We both changed and got ready for bed before cuddling up next to each other. “Sorry about earlier. I didn’t mean to yell I’m just really worried about what’s to come. I almost don’t want to know how many times this has happened already, or how many casualties have come from it.”

“Me either,” I said pulling him close to me, “I’m scared the number will be higher than we think and we both are already thinking of big numbers.”

Eren just let out a depressed sigh. “Hopefully Auruo or Molbit will have somewhat of an answer in the morning,” Eren said wanting to forget all about this for the time being and get some sleep.

“Hopefully,” I whispered.

“Baby,” I heard Eren whisper.

“Yeah?” I whispered back.

“I love you so much.”

“I love you too. I promise you when this is over we will get married,” I kissed him on the cheek as I saw his thoughts start drifting towards that field.

“Promise?”

“Promise.”


	11. Reckless Decision

When I woke up Eren was still peacefully sleeping. I got ready for the day and headed straight to Auruo’s office. I needed answers. I poked my head in and saw that Auruo was in there along with Pixis. I was surprised to see he was already awake. I was afraid I was going to have to wake him up meaning possibly waking Petra up. After taking a second look I realized why. Both of them looked tired. They never went back to bed after the meeting last night.

“Good morning,” Pixis said, seeing me in the doorway. “I’m sure you’re here for the same reason I am but sad to say we don’t have an exact number just yet.”

“Well, we’re probably not going to get an exact number right? So do you have a rough estimate?”

“A really really rough estimate,” Auruo mumbled. “I should also tell you that We are overestimating so you might not want to hear the number. I don’t want you to get too freaked out.”

“Trust me Eren and I probably have estimated worse.”

Auruo looked to Pixis to see if he should when Pixis nodded. “It's going to stress him out more to not know.”

“Alright,” he sighed, “well from taking the total population of our country 330.8 million we know that a little over half doesn’t have powers and a little less than half have powers. So about 198.5 million don’t have powers whereas 132.3 have powers. So from there if we divide that into three groups for the different badges we have about roughly 58.1 million for red badges, 43.1 million for green, and lastly, 31.1 million for blue badges. Then from there,” I could feel myself zoning out as he threw the numbers at me. I didn’t ask for the whole math behind it, I just asked for the estimate.

“Auruo I think you lost him,” Pixis interrupted his rambling. “Why don’t we just tell him the number flat out the math is a little complicated.”

“Oh, yeah sorry,” he said before looking for the number on the pages. “Here it is,” he cleared his throat. “So we estimated this has been happening for about three months now with information Molbit was able to gather. In those three months, we estimated that from the 31.1 million blue badges roughly 18,000 were taken to camps and roughly 5,000 were killed for “resisting”.”

I felt my body freeze up. I knew the number was going to be big but that’s insane. “How has no one realize this was happening until now?” I heard a voice behind me yell out. Eren? He’s awake. Oh shit.

“Well with how bad it’s gotten for blue badges most of them barely ever leave their houses anymore, that is if they still have homes. A lot of them have lost their jobs and have been forced to live on the streets or with other blue badges in cramped houses.” Pixis explained.

“With so many being on the street, living alone, or living with other blue badges it’s harder for people to notice when they start disappearing.” Auruo continued.

I backed up and linked my hand with Eren’s hoping to calm him down. I could feel his panic from here… no that’s not panic. “How close have we gotten to figuring out where these correctional camps are?” Eren said with an eerily calm voice. He was furious.

“After your last mission we’ve still gotten nowhere,” Pixis said flatly trying to keep a calm demeanor but I could tell he was disappointed.

“Your mission was supposed to help us triangulate where the camps are with the other prisoner transfer sights we’ve hit, but even looking at them from every different angle they make no sense,” Auruo said quietly.

“Well, maybe we should have more people out there looking for them,” Eren said his tone was cold. I need to stop him before he says something out of anger.

“We have tons of allies out there searching,” Auruo said quickly.

“Those three exiled you rescued earlier. Their whole group was looking for a camp. We thought one was in that area because of the heavy guard presence.” Pixis jumped in.

“Well was one there?” Eren asked.

“We have no idea, they were captured before we could figure it out.” He shrugged.

“Send us,” Eren said and I closed my eyes and let out a breath. That's what I was trying to stop him from doing. He’s being reckless because of his anger and now he’s made up his mind he won’t back down.

“It’s way too dangerous to-,” Auruo spoke quickly.

“No it’s not, if we have a good team we can get in and out and check it out,” Eren stood his ground.

“We need to think this through a little more,” Pixis said trying to reason with him, it was pointless.

“What’s there to think through, we need a team and I’ll come up with a plan done,” the anger rising in his eerily calm voice.

“Babe,” I whispered but was cut off by Pixis.

“Okay, what are you going to do if there is a camp there? Barge in and free hundreds of people if not thousands. Takedown hundreds of guards by yourselves. If you do manage to pull it off where will we bring these people? We can’t bring them all here if there are thousands.”

“Well-,” Eren went to speak but was cut off by Pixis.

“Now, what if there isn’t a camp? What if it was just a trap. What if you get captured? Are you really going to endanger your whole team by being so reckless? Will you endanger Levi? Armin? For what?”

Eren froze and just stared down at the ground with his fists balled up. He wanted to argue but he knew Pixis was right.

“I’m not saying you can’t go check it out I’m just saying you need to be prepared and not go in on a reckless whim especially if you’re going to be the team leader.” Eren’s head popped up. “It’s hard to deny you’re a good team leader, however, you can’t let your emotions get the better of you and drive you into a reckless decision. Being team leader means you have to keep a level head and watch out for your team not throw them into dangerous situations.”

“Okay,” Eren took a deep breath and relaxed his hands. “Do you think we can sit down in the conference room and plan out a mission?”

“Sure,” Pixis nodded. Auruo seemed concerned but just turned around to keep working on getting a better estimate of how many people are affected. I was just relieved that Pixis was able to talk Eren down before I had to drag him away.

We headed into the main conference room. It was where most missions were assigned and where most plans were discussed with Pixis and Shadis. We all took a seat and Pixis started the conversation back up.

“So how about for this mission we just do recon and see if there is a camp there. If there is you are to report back here where we will then discuss infiltration and rescue.”

“Okay, but I want in on the rescue mission too,” Eren said with determination in his eyes.

“That is if there is a camp there to begin with. If there is then we will probably need as much help as possible to take it down. So anyone willing to go will probably be on that mission.”

“Okay.”

“So what about this mission,” I interrupted trying to bring us back a notch. I mean they are talking about a mission that might not even take place.

“Levi’s right. So Eren why don’t you tell me what your plan for this mission is since you proposed it,” Pixis asked, giving me a thankful nod for getting the conversation back on track.

“Well, reconnaissance mostly,” Eren said before thinking for a second. “We would need a team of people who can get a lot of information fast without being caught as well as a few people who can fight in case we do.”

“Who are you thinking and why?” Pixis asked.

“Well, Levi and I are good at fighting so we could easily be the fighters, however, we both could get information easily.”

“How, be more specific.”

Eren paused for a moment and stared him down and I could feel how insulted he felt so I cut in. “He’s making sure we have everything planned out for safety reasons not because he doesn’t trust you. Three people were captured from the last group who went in, remember,” I said and I felt his nerves calm instantly.

“You’re right,” he took a calming breath before explaining his reasoning. “Well, with Levi’s mind-reading he would easily be able to hear people coming up on us as well as gain information in case we do run across some guards. As for myself, with my gravity powers, I can easily get a good vantage point as well as give others good vantage points helping us see our surroundings easier.”

“I see, okay who else, and how do you plan on using their powers?”

“Well first thought is Armin,” Eren said, “he can easily get information without being detected.”

“If you can talk him into accepting again then okay. Who else.”

“Berthold,” Eren said and I saw the confusion on Pixis face. “He can stretch any part of his body until it’s paper-thin. He can stretch his ears and eyes and listen and see in places without being easily spotted. Especially since this place is supposed to be inside a dense forest. There will be a lot of opportunities to hide the parts that are visible.”

Pixis gave Eren an impressed nod, “I like it, anyone else?”

“Ymir. She can easily get the spirits to gather information and she doesn’t have to worry about any of them being seen or a timer on her powers like Armin. The worst that can happen is that they drain too much energy and she passes out which we will be monitoring her the whole time to make sure that if that does happen she is safe.”

“Okay, anyone else?”

“Last person, Erwin. For transport as well as in case shit hits the fan and we have to get out of there fast.

“I’ll okay this mission on one condition,” Pixis said and I felt Eren tense up next to me. “You can be team leader, but Levi is co-team leader. If he feels like you are doing something reckless he can intervene.”

“Okay,” Eren accepted. I’m surprised I didn’t have to talk him into it. But why me I mean honestly I’m more likely to agree with the stupid reckless shit Eren’s doing. I guess there are a few reasons I would intervene but I doubt I’ll have too.

“How much time do you need?” Pixis asked and I could tell this was some kind of test. I couldn’t read his mind because of his force field powers, however, the way he asked it I know he was testing if Eren would say something reckless.

“I need to talk to the rest of my team before deciding,” Eren answered and I saw a little smile appear in Pixis's face.

“Yes you do,” he said before dismissing us, “Come back and let me know when you all have an answer.”

As we were leaving to track everyone down we bumped into Shadis just outside the door. He seemed really worried but just walked right past us.

I waited for the boys to leave before confronting Pixis. “What the hell are you thinking?”

“Whatever do you mean?” He asked with a fake tone.

“You know damn well this mission is too dangerous for them.”

“Shadis, they will be fine, they can handle themselves. You worry way too much.”

I rolled my eyes before looking him dead in the eye, “Do you want to be the pot or the kettle.”

“Okay, but I know when to trust them and back off rather than trying to protect them from anything and everything. This is war and they are adults. We can’t protect them from the world when they are all painfully aware of what is happening. If we tried to hold them back they would go and do it anyway just with less backup and support.”

“I understand that, but you give them too much reign. Three people were just captured here and you are letting a group of kids go in by themselves.”

“Again they are adults, and they aren’t alone, Erwin’s going with them.” He shrugged.

“That’s almost worse,” I sighed, “you and I both know he’s not the best when it comes to planning on the spot.”

“But Eren is, did you hear the plans he was coming up within here. It took him a few minutes to think of things you and I would never think of.”

“I heard him, but I could also hear the emotional outbursts and reckless attitude in Auruo’s office.”

“Okay, and that’s a bad thing?” Pixis said and before I could list a million reasons why that's bad he continued. “Shadis, you and I have both had those moments. I know it’s a bad thing to have them be your main point of focus and drive during a mission, however, he didn’t have them in a mission he had them after hearing the number of people that have been affected. You and I have both been in similar situations. Now that he’s got those emotions out he should be able to think clearly through the actual mission, and in case he can’t I made sure Levi would intervene.”

I took a deep breath and just shook my head, “I hope you're right about this.”


	12. Recon Mission Team

I took a breath to clear my mind. There was still a bunch of anger built up in me but Pixis was right if I was going to be team leader I have to keep a level head. I started looking for Erwin first since he was going to be the easiest person to track down. He was usually by the sparring area spotting matches.

We walked up and sure enough, he was standing just outside the ring and it looked like Jean and Marco were having another rematch. We walked up to watch the match. It looked like it had just started.

“Sorry babe, but it’s my turn to win,” Jean gave Marco a devious smile.

“You’ll have to earn it,” Marco said before freezing the ground inside the circle. Jean almost lost his footing for a second as his feet slid around on the ice before he managed to catch himself. He took a deep breath and the ground under him melted into a puddle.

“That’s new,” Jean looked so proud of him, “thinking outside of the box now.”

“More like inside of the circle,” Marco laughed.

Jean threw a fireball at Marco’s feet making him move towards the edge of the circle to dodge. Before Marco could recover Jean threw a few more fireballs. Marco dodges every single one, however, Erwin wasn’t so lucky. He happened to be standing behind where Marco had moved and a fireball grazed his clothes catching them on fire.

“Damn it, Jean, I’m running out of shirts.” Erwin yelled, “this is why I refuse to spot your matches,” Erwin kept mumbling as he tried to put the little fire out on his sleeve.

“Pause!” Marco called. Jean stopped and Marco turned around and used some water on Erwin’s shirt stopping the fire.

“Thanks,” Erwin said as Marco used his power to pull the water from the fibers of his shirt so he wouldn’t have to walk around in damp clothes.

Marco turned back around, “resume,” he called out and Jean did just that.

He switched up tactics probably to avoid hitting Erwin again. He used Marco’s ice to slide to the center of the circle before shooting fire out from himself from every angle. It looked like the center of a small explosion. Marco had no choice but to back out of the circle to avoid the fire.

“Nice job babe,” Marco said giving him a small clap,” I’ll have to remember that move for next time maybe if I’m more prepared I can counteract it.”

“Nice job to you too, the ice floor was a nice touch I almost fell on my ass,” Jean laughed as he stood up now drenched as the ice floor had turned to a giant puddle of water.

Marco cleaned up the water and Erwin fixed their scores. “Marco 7 Jean 6,” Erwin called out.

“Looks like I have to win 2 more to pass you up again,” Jean laughed.

I stopped myself from watching them and walked up to Erwin to talk to him about the mission. “Erwin, can we talk,” I said getting his attention.

“Do you need a spotter?” he asked.

“No, it’s about a mission,” I said quieter but it was no good.

“There’s a mission?” Jean asked.

“Yes, but you’re not in this one.”

“Who decided that,” Jean huffed.

“Me.”

“What why?” He sounded almost insulted for a second.

“Because this isn’t a fighting mission it’s a reconnaissance mission,” I hoped he would stop there, but he didn’t.

“Recon? For where?”

“We are checking out that forest where those three exiled were captured,” I said and braced myself for his reaction.

“You’re what? That’s stupid not to mention reckless whose idea was this?” Jean looked ready to march straight up to Pixis and tell him off for a second. Too bad Pixis isn’t to blame for this mission.

“Mine.”

Jean stood there staring at me as he processed my answer. “I should have known," Jean let out an annoyed sigh. "Eren look I know you want to do something about all of this shit that's happening, and trust me so do I, but this isn’t it.”

“Look I know how reckless it sounds, but we need to check to see if there is an actual camp there or not.”

“And if there is?” Jean asked expecting this plan to get even more reckless.

“Then I come back here and report it and we plan an infiltration mission. This is purely recon,” I said trying to ease his worries.

“I want on the mission,” he said looking at Erwin and Levi hoping they would allow it knowing I’d say no.

“He's the team leader he calls the shots,” Levi said calmly. Before Jean could freak out more Levi walked up to him and put a hand on his shoulder and lead him away so they could talk. I took this time to fill Erwin in more personally rather than through Jean’s questions. I told him that I will be gathering the rest of the team and we will all meet in the conference room in a few minutes. Levi joined me after he finished talking with Jean who seemed quiet now.

“What did you guys talk about?”

“I just assured him that we are doing this as safely as possible and that it’s necessary to get the information that could possibly be a game-changer. And when that didn’t work I told him that Pixis told me if you do anything reckless I can overrule your decision he seemed to calm down after that." Of course, that's what did it. "However, he is planning on staying up the whole night of the mission and waiting up for us so he wants to know when the mission is.”

I just nodded. We could do that, it wouldn’t be the first time we’ve had someone wait up for us. We started heading to Ymir next since she’s been itching for a mission for a while, and after last night's family meeting she’s going to be thrilled to be on this mission.

We found her sitting at a table alone but when we got closer we realized she wasn’t as alone as we thought. We walked up to her and she looked up giving us a smile. “What’s up?”

“We have a mission, want in?” I asked flat out.

“Always.”

“Awesome, conference room 5 minutes,” I said before heading to Berthold who was next to Reiner. Well, this should be fun I let out a sigh.

“I’ll do this one,” Levi said and I nodded.

“Mind if we steal him for a moment,” he said walking up and Reiner rolled his eyes at him.

“What the hell do you want?” Reiner groaned, “can’t you see we’re talking.”

“I’ll be right back okay hun,” Berthold whispered, putting his hand on Reiners.

“Fine, but make it quick,” he said in a softer voice as he looked at the table.

Berthold got up and we walked a few steps away. “We have a mission, do you want to be on it?” Levi asked.

“What’s the mission?”

“Recon, we are doing a briefing in the conference room in a few minutes after we track down Armin.” 

“Recon,” Berthold repeated before looking back over his shoulder at Reiner, who was starring at the table waiting for Berthold's return, then back to us, “okay, I’m in.” I could tell he was worried about leaving him behind, but we couldn’t really fit Reiner in on this mission his powers weren’t fit for recon.

“Great we’ll see you in the conference room,” Levi said giving him a pat on the shoulder.

We both walked away and Levi and I decided we had to go in separate directions. Levi ended up going to grab Auruo to help brief our team on everything we know about the area while I went looking for Armin. He wasn’t as hard to track down when I saw Mikasa. I knew Armin was going to be close by.

They were watching a sparring match between Annie and Franz. Annie looked like she was barely trying while Franz was trying his hardest. Franz had used both of his powers and was still unable to take Annie out. Franz replicated Annie’s powers and used them himself before eradicating them for her. She was powerless and still kicking his ass.

He doesn’t have the years of training that comes with her crystallization power so he was mostly just firing blindly as she stood there talking to Mikasa who seemed to be spotting them and Armin who was lazily sitting on the floor. His timer was probably almost up for both the eradication of Annie's power and the replication of it he was using. I mean the longest he can hold them is five minutes.

I was just surprised he was able to do either since to replicate someone's power he has to touch them and to eradicate someone's power he has to touch them and make direct eye contact.

Either he did it before the match started, or she let him there is no other way. I watched as the crystals withered away to nothing. Yup times up.

“Well, you tried,” I heard Annie say before her power came back to her. She crystalized her arms before making the crystals grow enough to push him out of the circle.

She turned back around and started talking with Mikasa. I just walked up to Armin to tell him about the mission. “Hey Armin,” I said in a more cheery voice.

“Don’t you dare say it,” he sighed.

“We have a mission,” I blurted out anyway.

“I told you not to say it,” he groaned, “what is it this time?”

“This mission is supposed to be strictly recon, hopefully.”

“Fine, where are we meeting your room again?” Armin said standing up.

“Nope conference room.”

“Ah, this one seems more official,” he laughed.

“Kinda,” I gave an awkward smile. It had to be with Pixis judging my every move for this mission. Every little thing I did felt like a test and I didn’t know if I was passing or failing at the moment.

“Alright let’s go,” Armin said as we all headed to the conference room.

We made it to the conference room where everyone was already sitting there waiting. Levi and Auruo stood up and came to the front of the room as Armin took a seat. Jean was sitting in the very back of the room and I looked at him for a moment and he just spoke up, “don’t mind me I’m just listening in I know I’m not on the team.”

“I told you he wants to know when we decide to do the mission,” Levi whispered to me. That's right he did say that, but I thought he wanted us to tell him, not sit in on our whole meeting.

“Alright let’s get started,” I announced.


	13. Deciding

Levi and I finished talking about the plan before sitting down and letting Auruo talk about what he knew about the area we were going to because the last thing we wanted was to go in completely blind.

“This forest is way outside of town several miles away. It’s a lot denser than the forest where the rescue mission happened. During the day the trees block out most of the light and during the night the forest is pitch black. You'll essentially be walking around blind. As far as we know there are no roads anywhere near the area, so if there is a camp there how they get the prisoners to it is a mystery. Lastly, this place has a heavy guard presence. The last group that went in there had three out of 5 members captured.” He took a seat and Levi and I stood back up.

Well, that's one way to tell them. “If any of you no longer want to work this mission then let me know now or after the briefing,” I said looking around I was sure Ymir would stay, but Berthold and Armin seemed a little less confident in their abilities and I wasn’t sure how they would react to hearing that the last group got captured.

No one said anything at first. After a few moments of Berthold spoke up. “This whole mission is about locating a correctional camp, right?”

“Yes, we are trying to see if one is in the area,” Levi answered.

“However, this could just be a trap for exiles we aren’t sure what we are walking into,” I said flat out letting everyone know that this mission might not be as simple as they might think. I wasn't trying to sugarcoat anything. The last thing I need is my team to have a false sense of security and be blind sighted. Then again I don't think we could sugar coat it even if we tried with Auruo right here, he'd definitely tell Pixis.

“But there is a chance there is a correctional camp there?” Berthold asked again.

“Yes, but-,” I went to tell him how we weren’t sure, and how it's not as simple as a yes or no, but he cut me off.

“But nothing, if there is even a small chance there might be one then I’m in.”

His attitude changed and he wasn’t the only one. Ymir and Armin both looked like they were ready for this mission now. “When is this happening?” Ymir asked. She seemed determined.

“That's what we’re going to figure out,” I said looking around. “When do you guys feel this mission should be?”

“Tonight,” Ymir blurted out.

Okay, I know this is going to sound hypocritical, but that’s reckless. I thought to Levi before speaking. “Now I know we all want to do something about this, but let’s not be rash.”

“I’m not being rash, I'm being logical,” she said defensively, “hear me out. We don’t have to practice for this, I mean how can we, we don’t know what we are getting into, at best this is a reconnaissance mission and at worst, it's a trap and we get captured or killed. The same consequences for any other mission we go on. The sooner we go the sooner we get the information we need. Besides, you said another group of exiled were captured in the area? Then if there is a camp there that means we need to move quickly, before they decide to beef up security."

Well, she brought up several good points that were hard to argue with, but before I could even try the others spoke up. “I agree with Ymir,” Berthold said and Armin nodded along.

I looked to Erwin for some help, maybe he could try and convince them to give us more time but it was useless. “Actually, I think she’s got a point,” he shrugged.

I took a deep breath and turned to Levi. Do you think Pixis would allow this? I thought to him.

Levi leaned in and whispered to me, “I think if I tell him about it and make sure he knows that this was their idea and that you checked to make sure it wasn’t just a rash decision I think he will be okay with it.”

I nodded and we looked back at everyone, “alright, we will run it by Pixis.” I just hope he decided to okay the mission after this.

We dismissed everyone and told them that we will grab them tonight for the mission. We were about to head to Pixis’s Office when Jean walked up.

“Look, Jean,” I cut him off before he could start with the lecture. “We are going to play everything safe and I know this might seem rushed but everyone seems to think it’s the best idea and-,” I was cut off when he threw his arms around me and pulled me into a hug.

“Just make sure you come back. I can’t lose my best friend,” he whispered before letting me go he left before I could say anything else.

“He’s really worried,” Levi said, placing a hand on my shoulder.

“I know, but risks always come with missions, and this is just another mission.”

“Is it though? I mean you and I both know this is riskier than our normal missions.”

“I know that, but if we want to make a difference in the work we have to take risks.”

“Hey you don’t have to justify yourself to me,” Levi said, catching on to my defensive tone. “I know you are determined to do this, and I know that when you are determined it's damn near impossible to change your mind. So I’m by your side no matter what even if it means going into riskier missions.”

“I know,” I whispered. That’s what scares me. Every time I get into a reckless situation I put you in danger.

He just put a hand on my shoulder, “and I’m okay with that. Like you said if we want to make a difference we have to take risks.”

We headed to Pixis's office to fill him in on our decision. When we walked into his office he looked up at me waiting for me to answer. “So when did you guys decide to go on the mission?”

“We decided to go tonight,” Levi answered.

“Oh really,” Pixis said, surprised-looking mainly at me.

“Yes, the whole team agrees that this is the best way to go about this," Levi answered again. 

“And who proposed tonight?” Pixis asked, probably making sure that it wasn’t me.

“Ymir proposed it and Eren double-checked that she wasn’t being rash. He had her explain why she thought it was best and when she explained her reasoning the rest of the team agreed.”

“Okay,” Pixis nodded, “your mission is approved, good luck tonight,” he said dismissing us.

Wait that's it. That was way too easy. Should I say something? Does he want me to say something? Is this another test? How am I supposed to know what to do? Maybe if I-.

“Thank you,” Levi said before turning around and leading me out of the room before whispering to me, “don’t question it. If you do he’ll think you aren’t sure of your answer.”

Right, thank god you’re a mind reader. I thought.

“Actually I can’t read Pixis’s thoughts. His power works as a force field around his own mind, however, I have learned a lot from reading everyone else’s minds and I know a trap when I see one.” He said before suggesting we head away from Pixis’s office.

We tracked down the team to tell them that Pixis approved the mission for tonight. We told them that they should all go to sleep early so they are well rested for the mission. We also made sure they all knew that we were meeting up in the common area.


	14. Reckless Sparing

We headed to the sparring area to see if anyone needed a spot. The second we came in we were instantly flagged down. “Hey come watch our match,” Hanna called out to us.

We walked up and saw she was versing Connie. This should be an interesting match. Her power requires her to look at the person the whole time to affect them fully. However, Connie is too fast to see.

“We’re going to need a barrier to make sure Connie stays inside the ring,” I said glaring at Connie.

“Oh come on I have never-,” he started.

“The match versus Jean, the match versus Christa, the other match versus Jean, another match versus Jean, the match versus Annie, another match verse Jean-” I started to list them off before he cut me off.

“Okay, so I’ve bailed a few times-.”

“13.”

“But I have good reasons for each of those,” he said, completely ignoring me. I just raised an eyebrow. This should be interesting. “Christa was going to make me walk out of the circle anyways and I really didn’t want her controlling me. Annie was going to kill me. She nearly skewered me with her crystals.”

“And Jean?” I asked.

“He’s an idiot and falls for it every time. It’s funny to watch him blast fireballs aimlessly at nothing for an hour.”

“Okay you have a fair point for that last one,” I said remembering the look on Jean’s face after finally figuring out that he’s been duped for the 11th time. Surprisingly enough he never learns and it takes him longer to figure out every time.

“Still, I don’t trust you,” Levi said waving Petra over.

“Invisible boundaries?” She asked.

“Yes please,” I answered.

She used her power to solidify the air encasing them in a completely see-through arena. She left them enough room to still knock the other out of the circle on the ground, but you couldn’t go too far from the match. “Alright, call me over when the match ends so I can let them out.” She said before being called over to another group.

“We really need to start calling her over when Jean spars,” Levi whispered and I quickly nodded my head.

“That would save us so many shirts.”

“Not to mention the burns,” Levi smiled.

I’m about to tell them to start you watch Connie’s thoughts to make sure he stays inside the circle.

“Done,” Levi said before closing his eyes knowing it will be easier to track his thoughts if he couldn’t see the chaos going on inside the ring.

“Three, two, one, Spar!” The second I said spar Connie was nothing more than a blur running around the circle.

“He's planning on giving her five minutes to try and take him out before he pushes her out of the circle,” Levi whispered to me.

“Well, at least he’s giving her a shot.” Their power match up isn’t the fairest.

I could see Hanna struggling as she tried to get her eyes to latch onto him, but he was both nowhere and everywhere at once. After the five minutes were up Connie reappeared and Hanna was standing outside of the ring. Well, she gave it her all. We called Petra over and she released them.

“Well maybe next time,” she sighed. “Was I even close?” she asked and Connie shrugged.

“I felt your power affect me here and there, but not enough to do more than give me a slight headache.”

“A headache?” She repeated, “my power is supposed to incapacitate,” she sighed.

“Yes, but you have to keep a clear sight on the person you're affecting the whole time this matchup was doomed from the start,” Eren shrugged.

“Yeah, but still I guess I was just hoping my power was strong enough that one glance would overload his mind. If I could have done that then while he was incapacitated I could have pushed him outside of the circle.”

“Good plan, but a bad person to test it on,” I said, patting her on the shoulder.

“Maybe I can go against you?” She asked, getting really excited.

“I don’t know about that,” I mumbled.

Yeah you have to deal with a small portion of that on a daily basis so either her power won’t work on you as effectively or it will work on you too well. Eren thought to me and that posed a bunch of questions that actually made me want to try this.

Her power is overloading the mind causing pain, memory loss, and lack of consciousness depending on how much she overloads it. However, my mind is always overloaded because of my power causing two of the three of those already. Memory loss is one I don’t think I’ve had before however, I can’t be certain since I wouldn’t quite be able to remember it if it had.

“Don’t tell me you’re actually thinking of this,” Eren whispered to me. “And you call me reckless.” No sparring before the mission. The last thing we need is your powers shot because of this.

“You’ve got a point,” I mumbled, “but I want to give it a try,” I shrugged before giving him a wink, “don’t worry I’ll call it off if it gets bad.”

Eren just stared at me before letting out a sigh, “fine, but this is your one reckless action for the week,” he rolled his eyes.

“Okay,” I said before walking into the ring.

Hanna walked into the ring and the second Eren stopped counting down and said Spar Hanna was pushed out of the ring.

“Done,” I shrugged. She gave me a little pout.

“That was mean.”

“Hey, I said I would verse you I never said I would let you win,” I shrugged. Eren was smiling and practically laughing wondering why he doubted me. Well, time to use up that reckless action he gave me. “However, I am curious about how your powers would affect me, so I’m giving you a free shot,” I said and I watch Eren’s smile vanished instantly.

“Wait what?” Eren asked the worry in his voice pained me to hear, however, I have to know how her powers affect me.

“Are you sure about this?”

“Yes. Give me your best shot.”

“Alright,” she said she sounded a little hesitant. She took a deep breath and looked at me and I felt a headache form in my head. Thoughts were starting to get thrown at me, but nothing more than a headache.

“This makes no sense,” I heard her mumble.

“What?”

“Well this is usually enough to bring a person to their knees,” she said and I smiled. Well, guess I have my answer. How long can I last?

“Try to make me fall unconscious,” I said and I could see the stress radiate off of Eren.

“Are you sure about this?”

“Yup.”

She took a deep breath and I felt severe pain in my head. I fell to one knee, but I was still conscious.

“Okay that’s enough,” I heard Eren call out before running over to me. The pain slowly vanished and I was left with a mild headache.

“Levi that was really reckless,” he said angrily as he gently caressed my face and looked in my eyes to make sure I was okay.

“I know, but I had to know. Turns out her powers work on me less than an average person,” I smiled.

“Sorry I-,” She tried to apologize but I cut her off.

“No, don't be sorry, I asked you too. I had to know.”

I walked out of the circle and sat on the side when I heard Connie challenge Eren.

“While he catches his breath how about a friendly match?”

Eren smiled and accepted. “Alright, I need to blow off some steam anyway.” Danger. He’s pissed right now Connie is so fucked. When he’s angry his powers get stronger since they are emotion-based.

“Levi, Hanna mind spotting us?” Connie asked.

I just nodded as I heard Eren’s thoughts. This won’t take long. I believed him.

“Three, two, one, spar!” I watched Eren do one hand movement and then another and Connie flew out of the circle. He flew out so hard he hit the floor and slid all the way to the wall that was about ten feet away.

As reckless as that was I’m not going to lie that was kinda hot. I stood up and went to check on Eren’s wrist since he didn’t have his braces on however, I think he ended that match before his wrists could even get sore.

“What the hell even happened?” Connie asked after he finally got some air back in his lungs.

“I increased the gravity on me keeping me in place against the floor making me too heavy to move out of the circle and then made a strong gravity field outside of the circle,” Eren shrugged.

“That was awesome,” Hanna said practically jumping up and down.

“Glad I could entertain,” Eren said, giving her a smile. He used his powers to lift Connie off the floor so he could get to his feet before releasing him.

“Thanks,” Connie mumbled, brushing off some of the dust on his clothes.

Levi and I headed to the common area to get some food that Molbit, Mom, and Erwin brought back. While eating I couldn’t help but ask mom if the two civilians were settling in okay. I hadn’t seen them all day.

“They’re still pretty shaken up about everything, but we got them some supplies, and Petra built them temporary rooms for the time being. They haven’t really left them all too much but we made sure to drop some food off with them first. We’re still trying to figure out what to do from here,” she told me and I nodded.

“I’m sure we’ll figure something out,” I sighed.

After we finished eating we did a few rounds around the building just to stay busy. Levi and I just walked and talked for a while. We speculated what the mission would be like and what to do if we get caught. We came up with a few backup plans, but none of them sounded ideal. Then again getting caught didn’t sound ideal, to begin with.

Before heading back to our room we stopped to check in with Pixis since our team was going to bed earlier than everyone else. He had taken over the nightly check-ins with everyone since we were on missions back to back these last two nights.

We made it back to our room. It was time to get some rest before the mission. I didn’t know if I would be able to sleep. I mean I’m the reason everyone is going to be in harm's way. I’m the reason for this reckless mission.

“Babe,” Levi whispered in my ear, “they were as ready for this mission as you were.”

“I know, I’m just hoping it’s not for the same reason,” I mumbled knowing that my emotions got me into this mess and I wanted to be on this mission purely out of spite. If anyone was finding one of the camps it had to be me. I had to give a giant finger to the government after the shit they’ve pulled.

Levi didn’t call me out on my thoughts, instead, he helped me get ready for bed and we laid down and tried to get some rest.


	15. Recon Mission

I woke up and Eren was still asleep. I’m just glad he was able to get some. It was too early to wake him, but there wasn’t enough time for me to try and go back to sleep. I started quietly getting ready before sneaking out to wake up the rest of the team. I was letting Eren sleep for as long as possible before finally waking him up. I ran my fingers across his cheek and placed a kiss on his forehead before lightly shaking his arm.

He sat up and blinked a few times as he tried to wake up. “Time to get ready?” he asked, letting out a yawn.

“Yeah, I already woke everyone else so you don’t have to worry about rushing.”

There was a long pause as he processed what I had said. “Thank you,” he said when his brain finally woke up enough to piece together the words I had spoken.

I finished grabbing the last of my stuff as he got ready. We were just leaving our room to start heading to the common area when Jean walked out of his room. “Is it time?” He asked. It looked like he hadn’t slept.

“Yes,” I mumbled and Jean followed us to the common area.

He wasn’t dressed in his costume, but he definitely was dressed in clothes that could easily cover his identity and his mask was in his pocket. His thoughts were clear as day and I realized they were directed to me. I’m not going to go with you however if shit hits the fan tell Erwin to open a portal and I’ll back you guys up if needed. I just gave him a slight nod.

We looked around the common area, everyone was there and Pixis was waiting for us. Jean walked over and stood next to Pixis telling him why he was here while Eren and I made sure our team was ready.

I looked at Ymir’s costume and couldn’t help but smile. Her black jacket had an ouija board alphabet and number layout on the back in white. Her sleeves had the words yes on one and no on the other. There was one giant yes and no in red font surrounded by little ones in white font. On the front of the jacket read goodbye in red. Her mask had a planchette sewed onto it. It was a nice touch. Her codename was Ouija so it was very fitting.

I looked at Berthold’s costume and man, there was a big difference between his and Ymir’s. Ymir went all out on her’s whereas Berthold had a plain black jacket with nothing on it aside from a little red spiral pattern meant to represent coils. Then again Berthold got stuck with the name resilient recoil. He didn’t choose a name and the media started calling him recoil so Reiner added resilient in front of it. I complain about my name, but I think his is way worse.

He slipped his mask on and it was just a plain black mask. I can’t really pick on that since mine and Erwin’s are just plain black too. Armin and I slid on our masks and I gave everyone a nod. I looked at Eren and waited for him to give the call. He looked at Jean and gave him a nod. His thoughts promising him that he will bring everyone back safe. I hope he’s right.

“Escapist, open the portal,” he said. Erwin nodded before doing so. Eren took a deep breath before walking through. He waved us through and I followed.

Eren and I looked around the area as the others came through the portal. Erwin was the last one through and he had the portal close behind him. It was nearly pitch-black around us. Even after my eyes adjusted I was only able to make out shadows around us eventually the shadows started to look familiar and I didn’t know if I was hallucinating or not.

I got an uneasy feeling of deja vu looking around, everything started to fill in around us with light despite there being none. This shadow was a tree, this one was a bush, this bush looks like it’s been trampled on. I realized why I could remember everything in the area. To make sure I put my hand to one of the trees and felt around for it. Yup, bullet holes.

I pieced it together and then turned to Eren. “This is where the last group of exiles was captured.”

“It was the only place I could visualize enough to place the portal,” Erwin said apologetically.

“Everyone be on guard,” Eren whispered. Eren made sure everyone's eyes adjusted to the low lights, it was still extremely hard to see, but some of the nearby trees were someone visible. By visible I mean just a slightly darker shadow than the air around it. “Ghost,” Eren turned to Armin. “I’m going to have you go invisible for a second but grab on to my hand okay?”

Armin vanished and Eren looked at his hand where Armin was holding. “I’m going to make you float above the tree line. Do you think you can phase through the leaves to stop from making any noise?”

“I can,” he whispered.

“Good, when you want down just think it and Malice Mind will let me know. Look for anything that could give us confirmation of a camp or at least a direction to head in.”

Eren sent him up and after a minute I told him to bring him down.

Armin reappeared in front of us and gave us a nod, “I didn’t see a camp, but I saw a faint light due north.”

“Okay, we will head that way,” Eren said before turning to me. “Listen for any thoughts that aren’t from our team.”

“Okay,” I whispered and waited for further instruction.

“Everyone stay close together. I know the low light is hard to see in, but be careful and try not to bump into anything. I want you guys to walk in a line and hold onto the person in front of you.”

We got in a line Eren took the front I grabbed onto his jacket. Armin grabbed onto mine, behind him Berthold grabbed on to his, Ymir grabbed on to Berthold's and Erwin grabbed onto hers. I notified Eren that they were ready and we started slowly walking. Eren used his arms to feel around trying to avoid walking into any trees, branches, or bushes.

After a few minutes of walking, I grabbed Eren’s arm with my other hand and stopped him. I whispered out the lightest shush I could before tapping the side of his head to let him know I heard something. Normally I’d tap the side of my head, but I don’t think he’d be able to see if I did that. There were a few thoughts coming from 3 different people around here. There were no lights and I couldn’t figure out where they were coming from. Some thoughts sounded closer than others, but I couldn’t get a good read on their position.

I put my hand against Eren’s and held up 3 fingers and Eren turned to Ymir. “Ouija can you have a spirit check around?” he whispered and she nodded. “Resilient Recoil, can you lend and eye?” He asked and Berthold nodded. I turned away and just looked towards Eren because watching him stretch random body parts kinda freaks me out.

Berthold found one hiding in a bush just a little ways in front of us but more to the left facing the opposite way. “He has night vision goggles,” Berthold whispered to us. His sight must be amazing… Actually I take that back night vision goggles give off light.

Ymir turned around and started whispering to a spirit. “There’s two more up towards the right; they also have night vision goggles. Up ahead there are a few more, but Gabriel says he can lead us past them safely.” Ymir whispered, turning to us.

Gabriel was her guardian angel spirit that stayed with her all the time. He’s the one who's been the most helpful on missions however, a few other spirits have been known to help out.

“Alright, you take lead,” Eren said, falling behind Ymir as we change the formation a little. We grabbed each other's jackets again and stayed close as Gabriel led us through the forest. Stopping every little bit as he went ahead and made sure the path was still clear.

She stopped us a little ways away from where Armin supposedly saw the light. “He says that there’s a lot of guards up ahead that are patrolling and it’s hard for him to find a clear way through. I might have to call in more help for this, should I?” Ymir asked Eren if that's what he wanted her to do.

“Do it,” he whispered.

She tapped my shoulder. “Mind asking for help?”

I felt a weight on my shoulders as if someone was leaning their arm on it, it had to be Farlan, and I felt someone poke my cheek, must be Petra. I took a deep breath. They always show up when I need them the most. “Hey guys,” I whispered. “Mind giving us a hand?”

I felt a pat on my shoulder, “they said they’re happy too,” Ymir nodded before whispering to them telling them what she needed them to do.

After she informed us that the three of them left to find a better way we all stayed low to the ground and kept our guards up until they returned. They all came back and had found a narrow way through that if we made no noise whatsoever then we just might be able to slip past, but we had to be quick about it, but not too quick that we get sloppy and make noise.

I looked to Eren to see if he would call this off since it was extremely risky. “We can do it,” he whispered. I have the power to overrule his decisions. I had to figure out if he was doing this on a reckless whim just to get closer to finding the camp, or if he actually believed in his team this much.

I stayed quiet and let him talk to Ymir to figure out the best way through. I watched his thoughts and his emotions. He was determined to find the camp, however, he genuinely thought we could pull this off, and he had a few ideas of how to make it a little easier.

He turned to Erwin first, “Escapist do you think you can portal us to the other side?”

“Not with great accuracy. I don’t know this forest and I don’t know the area ahead trying to make a portal or even teleporting us without a clear destination in mind can lead to some difficulties.”

“What kind of difficulties?” Eren asked.

“Well, there is no guarantee that we will end up where we want.”

“How far do you think we will be off target?”

“We could end up in a forest in a completely different country,” Erwin said and I watched Eren start to think of another idea.

“I can try to lift us all above the trees and we could try that way if you think it will be easier than trying to sneak all the way through,” Eren said turning back to Ymir

Ymir thought about it for a second. “Actually, if we are all above the trees then we could move a lot quicker and not have to worry about as many guards. Also, I could have them yell the instructions at me and no one will hear a thing,” she was thinking out loud for a moment before looking back to Eren. “Are you sure your power can hold all of us? Won’t it hurt you?”

“Not if I only take two of you and myself, Malice Mind can take the other two.”

“I’ll take Erwin and Berthold,” I volunteered. I can hold people for longer than Eren can without backlash affecting me almost instantly, and they seemed to be the two heaviest.

“Alright,” Eren nodded before looking to Ymir and Armin, “you two are with me.”

Armin got on Eren’s back and held on tight before Eren picked up Ymir bridal style so it would be easier for him to carry them. “If you tell anyone about this I will cause all the poltergeists I know to haunt you,” she mumbled.

“My lips are sealed,” Eren said with a smug smile.

Erwin and Berthold stood next to me since I didn’t need to physically carry them to make it easier on my power, unlike Eren.

I used my powers to carefully move the leaves above us so we wouldn’t make a noise going up above the trees. When we got above the tree’s I gently let the leaves fall back into place. These trees are taller than I thought. I can barely hold myself up this high. My feet are nearly touching the leaves below me. Damn these big ass trees. I can do it, I won’t let the rest of the team down.


	16. Reconnaissance

I could see Levi was struggling to stay above the trees. These trees must be taller than we thought. I asked Ymir how far we were before thinking too Levi. Ymir says it's right up here can you hold out for another minute? I thought to Levi and he gave me a nod. I looked forward and the lights we saw in the distance were dim, but a lot closer to us than before.

"Right here," Ymir said. I looked below us at one of the densest parts of the forest.

"It's too dense for the guards to patrol. There are a few guards around, but less than before and they aren't patrolling in groups." Ymir filled me in.

Levi moved some of the trees out of our way. I let him go down first before following behind him. My wrists ached slightly and I let out a sigh of relief. Looks like we landed just in time.

"They said they saw something that way towards the light. They saw a fence and some buildings."

Ymir said that and I instantly felt the urge to take off in that direction and see what it was. I took a deep breath. Eren calm down, keep a level head, do this right. I reminded myself.

"Let's go see what it is," I said, trying not to get my hopes up. It might not even be a correctional camp, it might just be a base, which would still be a game-changer in itself to find, however, it's not what we set out to look for… it's not what I set out to look for.

Stop it Eren get a hold of yourself. Even if it's not a camp even if it's just a base it will still be a good find it will still help us get ahead. I tried to convince myself but there was still a voice in the back of my head telling me but if it's a base then we can't rescue any people from it, unlike a camp.

I took a deep breath and pushed all my thoughts away as we got a direction of which way to go. We continued making our way to the light in the middle of the forest until Ymir had us stop.

By now the light was visible through the dense trees and we were in a safe spot away from where the guards were patrolling, at least for the moment. “There’s a compound ahead of us with a lot of people in it.”

“People?” I heard myself whisper, “guards or civilians?”

She stayed quiet for a moment before turning back around waiting for an answer. “Both,” she finally said.

I felt my heart start to race. This was a camp. “We need to get as much information as possible on the inside do you think your spirits can do that?” I asked her.

“I need to recruit a few more helping hands, or in this case eyes and ears, but I should be able to.”

“Ghost? Do you think you can take a look on the inside too?”

“How long do we have to get the information?”

“As long as you need,” I said looking to Levi to make sure he agreed. He gave me a slight nod telling me that he did.

“Well I can stay invisible for about three hours, but I can only stay phased for thirty minutes, so” he turned to Ymir, “depending on how long you can use your power you might be by yourself later.”

“How long can you hold the spirits?” I asked.

“It’s more complicated than that,” she rolled her eyes. “To keep spirits that aren’t normally attached to me around takes energy, but since I’m using spirits tethered to you guys it takes less energy, however, it takes energy to let them rome farther away from their tethered hosts. It also takes some energy to keep in contact with them as well as having them interact with objects. They won’t be interacting with very many objects, however, they will be popping between two places, us and the camp which is a lot farther than they would normally travel.”

“So how long do you think you have until your powers start draining you,” I asked, hoping for her to simplify it.

“I’m not sure maybe an hour, maybe less depending on how many spirits actually help us, but by the end of this I could be totally drained from this.”

“Well let’s try to get the information before your timers run out,” I said to both Ymir and Armin.

“We’ll get started on your say,” Armin said and I nodded. We were just waiting for Ymir to gather some helping hands.

“Resilient Recoil,” I need you to be our lookout. Eyes and ear on the guards around us and see if you can overhear any information from them can you do that?”

“Of course,” he nodded.

“Escapist, do you think you can make two sets of portals.”

“Sure, what did you have in mind.”

“One set with one portal in front of us with the other side behind us and another set with one portal to our right and the other side on the left. It won’t be a perfect cover but from certain angles, it will look like we aren’t even here.”

Erwin looked almost impressed with my plan. “I’ve never thought of using them that way,'' he mumbled before setting them up.

“Alright I have two more spirits volunteering to help,” she said.

I felt a cold feeling on my cheek. Someone was touching me. “Mom?” I whispered feeling a sting in the back of my throat. I haven’t heard from or felt her presence since Ymir talked to me about her on the field.

“She wants to help.”

I just closed my eyes and touched my cheek, “thank you,” I whispered before trying to regain my composure. Now wasn’t a time to get emotional.

I watched Armin squirm before placing a hand on his shoulder, “is my grandpa here?” he asked Ymir.

She just gave him a nod and I watched Armin close his eyes bite his lip trying not to break down. “Thank you for helping,” he said when he managed to get his voice back.

“That should be enough spirits,” Ymir said before pulling out a notepad and paper and sitting on the ground. “Ready when you are,” she said looking at me.

I looked at Armin and he gave me a nod. “Alright go for it,”

Berthold was able to gain some information from passing guards as they chatted with each other. Apparently, they were trying to figure out what to do with the camp now that the exiles that had almost found it, were running free. So far they didn’t know what was happening but they had speculated there were going to be more guards brought in.

Levi wasn’t able to hear much from where we were aside from when guards passed by. He mostly let us know there were guards around and to be careful with our noise levels.

After what I assume was thirty minutes Armin came back and let out a tired sigh, “I can’t phase anymore. I nearly got stuck in the fence trying to phase out of there.” he whispered, sitting down on the ground next to Ymir to help her fill out her notes more on what he learned.

A few minutes later the last of the spirits had come back just in time by the looks of it Ymir was looking absolutely exhausted. She looked like she might double over any minute. We waited for Ymir to finish getting the last of the notes down from each spirit. She was just finishing up when she froze up.

“Um, Orbit,” Ymir said all the blood drained from her face when she looked up at me.

“What’s wrong?” I saw Levi tense up from the corner of my eye. He must have read her thoughts.

“Ilsa Langnar,” she mumbled. That was Ymir’s old roommate before she switched with Christa. She was in a different class than us if I remember correctly.

“What about her?”

“Gabriel saw her in there.”

I felt my blood run cold for a moment before everything rushed me at once my face felt hot and I felt pure rage run through my body. How dare they. Ilsa was a sweet girl whose only dream was to become a journalist. I felt my legs move towards the camp.

“Orbit what are you doing?” Levi asked, walking after me.

“I’m freeing them. Now. She doesn’t deserve that. None of them do and I refuse to let them rot there for another second.”

“We can’t.”

“We have to.”

I felt his hand grab my arm, “Babe look at me,” he said and I wanted nothing more than to shrug his arm off and keep on walking, but I felt my body still and my head turned towards him.

“We all want to rescue them, to rescue Ilsa, but we aren’t prepared for it just yet.”

“I don’t care.”

“Please, think about this rationally. We will come back with a bigger team. We aren’t abandoning them, we are just making sure we are able to save them without getting ourselves captured in the process.”

I wanted nothing more than to argue with him. I could see the camp. The fence was right there. We were at the very edge of the forest. We were so close to it we are right here we can take it now. I let out a frustrated sigh and closed my eyes. Biting back my emotions I told my team, “Fall back.”

Levi patted my shoulder and I mentally cursed myself for letting my team see my outburst. “Escapist portal us back we’re ready to go,” I said and he opened a portal. We walked through and the first thing I saw was Pixis’s face. Great, he’s going to find out that I screwed up.


	17. Ilsa Langnar

The portal closed behind us and I looked around the room adjusting my eyes to the light difference. Our base wasn’t the brightest but compared to a pitch-black forest it’s a big difference. I saw Jean in the corner. He looked like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders, but he was dripping in worry. I looked to Eren who was mentally beating himself up for letting his emotions overwhelm him in front of the team. Pixis was coming over and I felt Eren’s body tense up more than it already was.

“You guys were gone for a while, did everything go okay?” Pixis asked.

“There is a camp there,” Eren said before having Ymir hand over her notes.

Pixis skimmed through them all, “Ilsa Langnar,” he mumbled to himself, letting an emotion slip, sadness, but it was only there for a split second before he shoved it down. Usually, it’s hard for me to feel his emotions, but that one came through clear as day. It hit me strong and made my eyes water before disappearing.

“Levi, at any point did you have to step in and make an order over Eren’s.” I could feel Eren’s shame as he asked.

“No. Eren did everything perfectly and kept a level head through the whole mission,” I said with a straight face. Eren had to stop himself from blurting out that I was lying. I was afraid someone else might speak up, Ymir and Armin probably won’t but Berthold and Erwin might. I waited but it stayed silent behind me.

“Good to hear,” Pixis nodded he seemed impressed, “Alright, we are going to take these notes and figure out what we need to do before we raid the camp. You all did amazing and you should get some rest,” he said before turning to leave. When he left Jean walked up to us with a smile.

“You did it,” he sounded shocked almost like he didn’t expect us to come back.

“Glad you had so much faith in us,” I rolled my eyes.

“Well, hearing that the last group got captured, and then having this guy lead you I was sure you would be screwed,” he teased before leaning in and whispering into Eren’s ear, “I had faith in you, but I was sure they would get you caught, I mean could you blame me you were on a team with Erwin.”

“I can hear you punk,” Erwin folded his arms. Jean gave him an awkward smile.

“Well, goodnight,” he said awkwardly before running back to his room tail between his legs.

Eren turned to me and just stared at me, “why did you lie.”

“Because your reaction was reasonable. Someone we know is in there, I was tempted to storm right into that camp with you,” I smiled and placed a hand on his shoulder.

“I was more confused that none of you guys ratted me out for lying,” I asked, mostly looking towards Erwin.

“Hey, we were ready to go in there and break her out as much as you guys were.” Ymir shrugged.

“Yeah, as much as I hate lying to Pixis, in this case, it’s necessary since we were all ready to run into that camp head first, myself included," Erwin agreed.

“We all let our emotions get the better of us, so it’s unfair to single out Eren even if he is the team leader,” Berthold said, giving Eren pat on the back.

“Besides, Eren was able to realize that he was making the wrong call, but most of us wouldn’t have. I mean I was ready to go in there even after Eren told us to fall back.” Armin said. His response shocked me the most. He wasn’t usually the one to make reckless decisions. Actually, scratch that, yes he is, he’s just more quiet about his reckless decisions. Sometimes I forget that this is the same person who jumped off the cliff. Well, fell off the cliff but same shit.

We all headed back to our rooms to get some sleep for the rest of the night. After getting out of our costumes and getting ready for bed I checked in with Eren to see how he was doing. “Are you okay?”

“Yes… no… I’m not sure,” Eren mumbled plopping down on the bed. He laid flat and threw his arm over his eyes.

“Well, what's on your mind?” I asked before realizing Eren would make fun of how I worded that.

“You should know,” he smiled a little.

“Okay smartass, are you going to tell me what you're thinking or not,” I rolled my eyes sitting down next to him. I didn't just want to tell him what he was thinking especially since his thoughts were all over the place. I wanted him to actually sit down and talk them out with me. Maybe it will calm his nerves a little.

“It’s just I’ve never expected when we found a camp to recognize someone in it.”

“I get that, I don’t think any of us were ready for that. Even Pixis was caught off guard.”

“No, he wasn’t. He acted like he didn’t even care. He didn’t even give it a second thought.” Eren said sitting up.

“He might not have said anything, but he was definitely thinking it.”

“How do you know, you’ve told me your powers don’t work on him.”

“They don’t, well not usually, but today for the first time they did. I couldn’t read his thoughts, but I could feel his emotions for a moment before he shoved them down. All I felt from him after he said her name was overwhelming sadness. It made my eyes start to water.”

Eren just stared at me for a second before letting out a sigh, “well then he should’ve said something rather than just bottling up his emotions. If he never shows us anything how are we supposed to know if he actually cares or not.” Eren mumbled before plopping back on the bed and closing his eyes. “I don’t know, I just don’t want to think about how she’s trapped in there. I’m just glad she's not on the deceased list, but I keep thinking that for all we know who's to say one of our other classmates isn’t?”

“Eren-,” I tried to calm him from his spiraling ramblings, but he cut me off and continued.

“I mean I’ll admit I don’t know Ilsa very well we weren't able to hang out for very long before we all got split up, but from what I do know she’s a sweet lady who doesn’t deserve any of this. She would spend all her time writing and drawing. I remember this one time she offered to draw my mother for me when she heard me and Mikasa talking about her. I still have that drawing somewhere. I wonder if she remembers doing that?”

“Of course she remembers,” I cut in finally finding a perfect place that would halt his ramblings.

“You really think so?”

“I mean that was a part of her powers. Perfect memory recall.”

“Oh yeah,” Eren said thinking for a moment, “I forgot about that. I just knew she had telepathy powers. I remember because they remind me of the opposite of your powers.”

“Yeah, she can put her thoughts in someone's head if she has a specific person in mind and there within a 100-foot radius of her.”

“Yeah, and doesn’t she have another memory power?” Eren asked.

“Adoptive muscle memory, she can watch someone do something and perfectly replicate it and remember how to do it.”

“Yeah, that’s right!” Eren said with a big smile. “I remember now.” I felt a wave of sadness hit me.

“What’s wrong?”

“I just wish I got to know her more back then. Maybe then I could have convinced her to come with us when the time came.”

“I don’t think anyone would have been able to convince her,” I sighed laying next to him. “She had her whole life planned out and any deviation from that plan was out of the question. She was going to graduate and find a good job as a journalist, before settling down and having a family writing a few books here and there. She even said that she would help the police and draw up sketches of suspects.”

“Well, now the whole plan is thrown out the window, I can only imagine how lost she must feel. Everything is wrong and she has no sense of direction. She’s locked in a cell surrounded by guards with her whole life flipped upside down. She must be so scared.”

Another wave of sadness hit me and I just wrapped my arms around him, “We should get some sleep we can talk about this more in the morning.”

“How am I supposed to sleep knowing she’s trapped at that camp being tortured.”

“Think of it this way, you need to sleep because we never know when the mission to raid the camp is coming so if you want on that mission you need to be at your best,” I said running my hand through his hair.

“Fine, but this mission better come soon, or I’m raiding it myself.”

“The hell you are. No way in hell I’d let you do that. Not alone. You better believe that I would follow your dumbass to our inevitable death.”

“Glad to hear,” He laughed.

“And besides if you go you know damn well that Armin, Mikasa, and Jean would go too.”

“And if Jean goes we know Marco would follow," he added.

“And let’s be real Ymir would probably go just to save Ilsa, and Christa would follow her.”

“Don’t forget Sasha she would go just to fight people and Connie would follow her,” Eren smiled.

“I’m sure if Hanji and Erwin found out I was going they would go too,” I shrugged.

“Definitely,” Eren smiled, “so there’s a majority of us already.”

“Hell might as well go now then,” I joked.

“Don’t say that or I just might,” Eren teased back.

We both laid down to get some rest. Eren fell asleep pretty quickly, but I found myself wide awake. I don’t know why Pixis trusted me to make the right call. I almost didn’t. When I heard Ilsa was in there I had to stop myself from raiding the place myself. So when Eren tried to go in I almost let him. I hesitated. What if I wasn’t able to push aside my emotions? What if-. No, I’m not going down this road.

I tried to clear my head, but all I could think about was Ilsa. Marco was the first person who tried to talk to me and actually get to know me. I think it was because we were roommates he felt like he had too. Of course, I pushed him away, but Ilsa, she wasn’t my roommate she had no need to try and get to know me but she actually tried to talk to me anyway, and she didn't give up as easily as Marco did. Hell, she never gave up.

Even when I pushed her away she would still go out of her way to let me know that she was always there if I changed my mind. She would always wave at me in the halls and give me a big smile. She wasn't as obnoxious as Eren, but she made sure to let me know she was always there for me even if I didn't want her there.

After Eren and I started dating I remember being too afraid to face her, but every day she still gave me a big smile. I remember the day I swallowed my pride and walked up to her. I wanted to say hello, but the first thing that popped out of my mouth was, “I’m sorry.”

She just laughed and said, “what for?” She just asked if I wanted to be friends and when I nodded her smile got even bigger. I just wish I had swallowed my pride sooner because little did I know we would only have a week with her.

She had just started hanging around; she even offered to draw Petra and Farlan for me, but it never happened. Later that day Pixis gave the announcement that the school was closing down. The thought never even crossed my mind that she wouldn’t come with us. When I looked around and couldn’t find her anywhere I knew that I might never see her again. Now, I might, but for the wrong reasons. Eren was right, she doesn’t deserve any of this, none of them do. We need to free them and soon.

I took a deep calming breath and looked down at Eren who was sleeping peacefully in my arms. I placed a kiss on his forehead. “We will free them,” I whispered to him before closing my eyes. “We have to.”


	18. Drill

I opened my eyes and was met with a face hovering right above me. Their eyes looking right into mine. “What the fuck are you doing?” I asked rubbing at my eyes to see if I was hallucinating or not.

“They sent me to see if you were awake,” Hanji said, backing up.

“So you stare at me until I do wake up?” I asked, “who sent you?”

“Pixis, and Shadis,” she said, “and well I knew you would wake up if I stared long enough.”

“Where’s Eren?” I asked looking around seeing that he wasn’t next to me.

“He’s watching a match.”

“Between?”

“I don’t know.”

"Why did you wake me up?"

"What is this twenty questions?" Hanji laughed.

"Hanji, why did Pixis and Shadis have you come in here?"

"Don't know," she shrugged, "They just told me that if you were up to have you report to them."

Shit. Did they find out that I lied and covered for Eren? "Did they seem mad?"

"Huh," she gave me a confused look. "I don't know, they looked normal I guess. Then again I can never read those two. Why did you do something wrong?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I was just wondering."

"That's not a no! What did you do?" She asked her eyes going wide as she waited for my answer.

"Nothing, I was just wondering," I rolled my eyes and let out a sigh. "Imma get dressed then I'll meet them so you can leave now."

She nodded and was starting to head out but not before thinking over and over again Levi's in trouble, Levi's in trouble, Levi's-.

"Fucking lunatic," I mumbled under my breath

"What was that?" She asked, poking her head back through my door.

"I said you're a fucking lunatic!" I yelled at her this time.

She just laughed before leaving.

I got ready before heading to Pixis's office. Both Pixis and Shadis were in there, but Petra was also sitting in there. Maybe I'm not in trouble, I thought before taking a seat. “Alright, now that you are here we want to talk to you both. So we are planning on having a drill today, I know we usually don’t tell anyone when drills are happening however, this one is going to be a little different.” Pixis started explaining.

“We have two civilians staying here, and we don’t want to scare them with the drill,” Shadis explained. “We have already told them about the drill and we told them that they don’t need to participate. They plan on staying in their rooms.”

“Since you two usually handle most of the heavy lifting during the drills and direct others on what to do during it we needed to sit down with you and fill you in,” Pixis said.

“So what do you need us to do?” Petra asked.

“I want you to do everything like a normal drill, except, leave those two rooms intact. “Do you think you can do that?” he asked.

“I can do that,” Petra nodded.

“During the drill, I also need you both to make sure that everyone else leaves those two rooms alone,” Shadis added.

“We’ll make sure they know,” I said.

“Good,” Shadis said.

“You two are dismissed. We aren’t going to tell you when the drill will happen today, but just that it is happening.” Pixis said and we nodded. Makes sense. The only people who know when the drill is happening are Pixis and the two civilians.

“Actually, before you go,” Shadis stopped me before turning to look at Pixis.

“Oh right, make sure Eren puts his braces on if they aren’t already,” Pixis reminded me.

“I will.”

Drills are always stressful, but I understand why they are necessary because one of these times it might not be a drill. We’ve done everything we can to improve them and make them go as quickly as possible. We are all living out of suitcases and all of our little belongings are in bags. Nothing is left out aside from our costumes. They are always left on hangers and any loose accessories are always pinned to them.

The beds are just mattresses on the floors. Pillows and blankets are sorted out after the drills there’s usually names sharpied on the tags of the pillowcases and blankets.

I headed back to our room to see if Eren’s braces were there or if he had them on. I checked his costumes and the braces were missing. He must have had Jean help him put them on.

I headed over to the sparring area and found Eren watching a match. Christa and Sasha were still sparring it seemed.

Sasha and… 1, 2, 3- 19 of her doubles were walking around the circle while Christa was trying to find which one was the real Sasha and have her walk out of bounds. I’m surprised that 20 Sasha's haven’t pushed her out of bounds yet. Maybe they made a deal.

“Who's winning?” I asked walking up next to Eren.

“Sasha so far,” Eren laughed. “Christa bet her she can make her walk out of the circle within 5 minutes.”

“How long does she have?”

“Less than a minute to find Sasha.”

“So what was the deal Sasha’s not allowed to push her out of the circle for 5 minutes and Christa can only affect one person at a time?”

“Yup,” Eren nodded.

“Times up,” he called.

“Wait no I almost-,” Christa said before getting picked up by one of Sasha’s clones and carried out of bounds. “Had it,” she finished in a defeated tone.”

The doubles disappeared and Sasha walked out of bounds to Christa, “you were really close a few times, but I had doubles walk in front of me whenever you actually did look in my direction.

“Dang it, I knew I kept seeing you all clump up at times, but I couldn’t figure out where you were in all of it.”

“Better luck next time,” she said patting her shoulder.

We watched a few more sparring matches and a few hours passed. I nearly forgot that we were having a drill today when a portal opened in every room and Pixis’s voice came through. “Someone has discovered the base, Drill. Go.” The portals closed and everyone headed to the back wall where the bathrooms were located.

Petra and I took the first floor. Franz touched Petra and headed to the basement. He was told to turn everything to air and not to breathe anything in. He was then told to meet Armin upstairs. He was told to do the same thing upstairs before touching Armin and they both would phase through the floor and meet us in the usual place.

“Leave the two rooms with the civilians alone, they are not a part of this drill,” I said and everyone nodded. Petra turned all the walls we had made to liquid while I moved it to the side. Eren, Erwin, and Hanji had started clearing everyone's things. Hanji was grabbing the little things with her vines. Erwin was portaling beds against the wall. Pixis helped out using his forcefields to bring over some of the beds. Eren and I had pulled the rest of the beds against the wall and lined them up as efficiently as possible.

Petra ran over to the sparring areas turning the painted circles into a gas before running back over to us.

When we were all done I pulled the liquid over to us and put it into place where Petra solidified it into a wall. We all stayed quiet behind the wall. There was just enough space for us all to stand comfortably with the beds against the wall. Aside from the two rooms with the civilians, no one would ever be able to tell there were any exiles here.

The space between the wall was only a few feet and no one would ever be able to tell that the wall we put up wasn’t the wall that was originally there. Pixis told us the drill was over and gave us the time. “Two minutes,” he said, “that’s quicker than last time.”

I was relieved hearing that it was faster than last time. If I remember correctly last time it was two and a half minutes, but it’s still not fast enough. We need to have this down to about a minute or a minute and a half. It sounds impossible, but I know with more practice we can do it.

We spent the next hour putting everything back. It took Petra and me a little while to put all the walls back up. We had to take a few five-minute breaks here and there to let our powers rest for a moment. When we finished I checked in with Eren. He had just finished helping everyone get their stuff back into place.

We were all about to settle down for the evening when we heard Pixis’s voice ring out. “Family meeting!” he shouted and we all headed up the stairs.


	19. Raid Family Meeting

As we walked in the room Pixis pulled us Eren and me aside and told us to sit up by the front. We took our seats and watched as Erwin, Ymir, Berthold, and Armin were also pulled aside and directed to sit next to us.

“This must be about our mission notes,” Eren whispered.

“I think they are going to try and see who wants to raid the camp.”

“Do you think they are going to bring her up?” Eren asked as he was thinking of Ilsa.

“I don’t know.” I looked around the room to see if everyone was here and saw the two civilians were sitting in the back.

“What are they doing here?” I asked Erwin hoping he would know.

“They wanted to know what was going on, so Pixis invited them to listen in.”

We all quieted down when Pixis and Shadis walked up to the front.

“Hello everyone, as some of you may know there was a recon mission last night. The point of the mission was to find out if there was a correctional camp at a point where another group of exiles were captured. Well, they found one. So thanks to their notes,” he said, gesturing to us, “we can start planning a raid on the camp.”

The room erupted in cheers. A few people shouted that they wanted to be a part of it.

"Alright, settle down everyone," Shadis tried to quiet the room so Pixis could continue.

“We will have a chance at the end to talk about who wants to be on the mission, but first let me explain what we are going up against. First of all no matter what we are going to have to call other exiles for back up. There are too many guards, and there were speculations of them upping the guard level as is. We are also going to have to set up places for these people to go.”

Auruo’s hand shot up, “Pardon my interruption, but there’s a group of Exiles that have recently contacted us they have a place for refugees. I mentioned to them that we were looking for a camp and they said any refugees we come across we can send their way.”

“Thank you Auruo,” Pixis nodded, “well that’s one issue solved.”

He went back to addressing the notes. “From what their team noticed,” Pixis pointed to us, “guards do routine patrols around the whole perimeter and the inside of the compounds are heavily guarded. There are guards positioned by each building. There are cameras monitoring every inch of the inside. We don’t have an exact number of inmates, but the notes say there were at least a couple hundred.”

I got distracted by Eren’s thoughts. He already had a plan of how to raid this camp. “Write it down,” I whispered to him making sure that he wouldn’t forget this plan since it did sound like our best bet. I watched him pull out a pen and paper. He still keeps a mini notepad on him, adorable.

“The prisoners are kept in different conditions based on their badge colors. Red Badges are kept in a room filled with up to 10 different people per room. They have a little more freedom and a slightly bigger room with less guard presence. Green Badges are kept in rooms with anywhere between 2-4 people in a room based on their powers. There is a slightly heavier guard presence but nothing too severe. Blue Badges on the other hand are kept in tiny rooms by themselves. Their whole section is flooded with guards. The notes say there are at least two guards per each cell, maybe more.” I could feel the tension in the room rise. I don’t think people realized just how many guards might be here beforehand. Even what Pixis was describing was minimizing the number of guards Armin saw.

Pixis finished explaining the rest of our notes to everyone before getting really quiet. He must have hit the last note on the list. “Lastly, I wanted to address something. I don’t want this to affect your decision to join the mission, however, you all deserve to know. While the team was gathering information they recognized someone in the camp. Ilse langnar-,” Before he could even finish what he was going to say the room exploded with outrage.

“They’re going to fucking pay,” I heard Sasha say.

“Why would she be there. She’s too nice to be there!” Christa yelled.

“Everyone shut the fuck up and let the man finish,” Reiner said and everyone went quiet. I’ve never heard such hurt in his voice. Reading his thoughts I can see why. She was one of the only people to actually talk to Reiner even after he tried to push her away. He considered her a friend.

With the room quiet, Pixis continued. “Anyone who wants to join the mission is welcome. I will be heading to the conference room if you are interested in being a part of the mission. Meet me there in 30 minutes. Meeting dismissed,” he said and I watched everyone get up with the intent of heading straight to the conference room and just waiting there. Myself included.

I watched Eren walk up to Pixis first. Uh oh here we go. I turned around and walked up to Eren trying to figure out what the fuck he was getting us into now.

“If this is about signing up for the mission then meet me in the conference room,” Pixis said hoping that would work. It didn’t.

“I actually wanted to talk to you,” he said and Pixis looked pleasantly surprised that it wasn’t about the mission.

“About?” He said giving Eren a little smile.

“The mission,” his smile vanished. “Look, I just want to run some ideas by you. It might solve some of the issues that we came across,” he said and Pixis gave a sigh knowing that Eren wouldn’t give it up.

I watched Pixis plop down in a chair and waved me on to continue, “fine.” Levi came up next to us and took a seat behind him to listen in.

“Well, the first thing is about team leader,” I started and was instantly cut off by Shadis.

“Absolutely not, this is too big of a mission to have a child leading it-,” Pixis cut him off.

“Now, now, let him finish.”

“I wasn’t saying I wanted to be team leader, well I mean, I was, but not the only one,” I said and Pixis raised an eyebrow.

“Not the only one?” He asked curiously.

“What is that even supposed to mean,” Shadis rolled his eyes.

“Well, this is a huge mission right?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, we should separate into different teams. Of course, we have you lead us in, but you won't be able to keep watch over everyone, so we should split up into teams that we think we can best manage and have a bunch of team leaders leading their own groups,” I explained and I watched Pixis’s raise his eyebrows and look to Shadis.

“He never fails to amaze me with his ideas,” he mumbled pointing to me and I let a smile slip onto my face.

“I like it,” he nodded.

“Now can I give you my second idea that could help us a lot with the guard problem.”

“Yes please continue,” he said, leaning in more interested in what I had to say now.

“Well, we should start the raid from the inside.” I could tell I lost him right there he looked confused.

“Explain.” He said quietly as he tried to wrap his head around what I said.

“Well, Mina, Armin, and Ymir’s powers would come into play here. We can start with Mina’s power.”

“Possession? How would that work?

“Well, her power requires her to be in a mile radius of the person she is controlling, and she can control them for up to thirty minutes,” I said trying to remember the exact parameters of her power. “So as long as we can get her within a mile of the camp, which is doable. Then she could possess the guard in the camera room and have them shut down the cameras.”

“And if there is more than one guard in the room.”

“The thirty minutes we were watching the camp there were only one or two guards in there. So that's where Franz, Armin, or Erwin come in. We could either have Franz replicate Mina’s powers, however, he would only be able to hold it for five minutes, or we could use Armin or Erwin. Armin could easily slip into the room and knock out the other guard, or we could have Erwin teleport into the room behind the guard and knock him out.

“How will Erwin know where to teleport?”

“Before we start he can use astral projection to scoop out the camp so he knows his way around it.”

Pixis nodded. “Alright, and you said Ymir’s powers would be needed for this?”

“Yes, she can have spirits interact with small items. So maybe she can have them grab the keys of the guards and pass them to Armin. or something like that.”

“I like it so far,” he nodded, “what’s next?”

“Well, that's when we start the raid. We have Erwin portal us inside the compound in the camera room where the guards will be knocked out. We divide and conquer. If we avoid the guards around the compound and skip to going straight inside then we deal with the least amount of guards this way.”

“I have to admit, you’re an amazing strategist.”

“I hope you have all those plans written down,” he said and I nodded holding up the notepad. “Good. You ready to share them?” He asked and I gave him a nod. “Alright then, let’s head to the conference room and we can plan more from there depending on who actually decides to join the mission.”

I nodded and looked at Levi. He liked my ideas! I thought to him. He just gave me a smile. We followed Pixis and Shadis down to the conference room where almost everyone was waiting.


	20. Raid Volunteers

Pixis opened the door to the conference room and let everyone in. I walked in the room hand in hand with Levi feeling a lot better about this raid especially now that Pixis heard and liked a few of my ideas. The sooner we finish planning this mission the sooner we can save Ilsa and the others.

We need to save her and when we do I will take more time to hang out with her and get to know her more. I’m just mad that we had to find her in a correctional camp for me to remember how amazing she is as a person.

“Ijusthpetesmepsn” Levi mumbled. He looked drained probably from the drill earlier. He was starting to zone out a little and I could feel the exhaustion pouring off of him.

“What was that baby?” I asked, giving his hand a light squeeze. He still looked mentally checked out.

“I just hope she’s the same person,” he mumbled a little more clearly this time.

“What?”

“Well who knows how long she’s been in the camp and how much torture she’s endured because of them,” his own words seemed to snap him back to reality. “I mean. Shit. Did I say that out loud?”

“I didn’t even think about that,” I whispered before my thoughts started racing. Torture changes people. What if she’s been there for months. What if she forgets about the person she used to be, wait she can’t forget she has perfect memory recall, but wait that means no matter what she can remember all the torture the put her through.

“Babe, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to blurt that out. Please try not to think about it too much. She’s strong. I'm sure she will be okay.” I could tell he didn’t even fully believe what he was saying and he was scared too, but I could also tell he was worried about scaring me.

“You’re right, she’s strong, I’m sure she will be just fine, we just need to get this mission going,” I said lying to myself for the sake of both of our sanity.

Levi nodded before grabbing my hand and giving it a squeeze. We watched as the last few people took their seats. “Alright, let me take everyone’s names down,” Pixis said looking around the room. There were so many people in here that some were standing up against the back wall.

He mumbled the names to himself as he wrote them down. He started with Shadis and himself. “Erwin, Hanji, Eren, Levi, Sasha, Connie, Mikasa, Annie, Armin, Jean, Marco, Christa, Ymir, Reiner, Berthold, Hanna, Franz, and lastly Mina.” He said finishing off the names.

I looked around and noticed only a few people missing. Mom, Molbit, Mike, Eld, Petra, and Auruo were the only ones who I couldn’t see.

“They aren’t the mission type,” Levi whispered.

Makes sense most of their powers aren’t fit for this type of mission, and two of them don’t even have powers. I thought to myself.

“Alright, so what we have to do is figure out when and how," Pixis continued.

“Well don’t we have to ask other groups of exiles to help us?” Hanji asked.

“Auruo actually contacted a few groups already, and one volunteered to help us and we gave them a place to lay low for a while. They are a smaller group so they are following our lead; they just need to know when we are planning to act, and what the plan is. They should actually be arriving any day now.” Pixis answered and I looked around the room.

I guess I wasn’t the only one feeling utterly confused. This is going to be interesting. I mean we’ve never let strangers into our base, but now we’ve let two separate groups in the same week. First civilians, and now other exiles I can’t help but worry a little.

“I’m sure everything will be okay. Pixis wouldn’t let them in if he didn’t trust them,” Levi whispered to me, but I could tell he was worried too.

“Now we’ve been trying to figure out how to go about this raid, however, earlier Eren came up with an idea that we would like to run by you all,” he said gesturing for me to come up to the front.

I stood up and walked to the front of the room where he gestured for me to stand. “Well, I noticed some of the main issues the main one being how heavily guarded the outside of the camp was. I noticed there are fewer guards on the inside and our main problems are the cameras. So I figured that if we can get in the camera room and knock out all the cameras without alerting anyone we can start the raid from the inside of the camp and avoid a big chunk of the guards.”

“How do you plan on knocking out the camera’s,” Jean asked he sounded genuinely interested in the plan.

“Well, we have a few different ways planned for that, but I would like to check with the people to make sure they are okay with doing this before I say anything,” I explained. The last thing I wanted to do was force someone to do something they aren’t comfortable with and putting them on the spot is doing more harm than good.

“What are some of the other issues you noticed?” Reiner asked. He didn’t seem like he was being as stuck up as usual. Instead he was actually paying attention to what I was saying and asking questions.

“Well, I realized that we would have trouble communicating and following instruction from Pixis if we can’t hear him.”

“So how did you come up with a way to fix that?” he asked.

“Well I suggested that we split into smaller teams. We take our main orders from Pixis, but he chooses team leaders that he feels would best be able to lead and we go from there. Divide and conquer.”

“I choose the team leaders?” Pixis whispered to me he sounded a little surprised. “That’s a stressful job.”

“We still need to know when this is happening,” Shadis cleared his throat.

“Well, I figured we would get you all acquainted with the exiles that will be joining us before we decided. Someone of them might have some useful powers that can change our plans drastically,” Pixis said before turning towards me. “Until then we will continue to bounce around ideas. You guys are dismissed, however, Eren and myself will be in contact with you all.”

Everyone got up and started leaving the room as Pixis turned to me, “I want you to talk to people who are involved in your plans, but I’m also going to need your help.”

“My help? With what?”

“Well, you said I get to choose the team leaders right? Well, I need your help choosing them. You’re really good at making teams and plans. So I need you to help me choose team leaders and the teams that go with them.”

That’s not at all what I expected. I don’t know if I’m up for that big of a task. I usually base them off powers and how they interact with each other, but I don’t know everyone as well as Pixis must think I do. I looked at Levi for some help. Maybe he could talk Pixis out of it. “What do you think about this Levi?” I asked.

“I think that’s a great idea,” Levi said grabbing my hand before leaning in and whispering, “I know you’re worried, but you’ll do great babe.”

You’re no help. I thought to him before turning back to Pixis. “Okay, let’s get started I guess,” I said, giving him an awkward smile.


	21. Making Teams

We left the conference room and headed into Pixis's office. Shadis and Pixis took a seat on one side of the desk and Levi and I took a seat on the other.

"Here is the list of everyone who volunteered for the raid. We need to make teams from this. Do you think you can do it?"

"Well, I'm assuming these teams are rough draft teams since we don't know where the other exiles will fit just yet."

"Exactly so feel free to change these up as much as you'd like. Just spitball any ideas you may have." Pixis smiled.

“Well, let’s see how many people we have.” I looked at the list and counted up all the names on it. “So far we have 20 people not including the group of other exiles that are joining us. So if we want even groups as of right now we can have five groups of four or four groups of five.”

“What do you think is better?” Pixis asked looking at me.

“Well, I think that we should do four groups of five. I think it will be safer to have five people in a group.”

“More people to have your back,” Levi said backing me up.

“Okay, so groups A, B, C, and D,” Pixis said writing that down on a piece of paper.

“Well we can break everyone down into groups based on what roles they will play in the mission,” I suggested.

“Explain,” Shadis said leaning forward a little with a confused look.

“Well,” I paused for a moment as I looked at everyone’s powers. I had to figure out how to explain this to them. Levi pushed a piece of paper closer to me.

I thanked him and wrote down everyone's names again. “So we have the people who are essential to the mission, people who are fighters, people who are background fighters, people who are defenders and people who need defending,” I said before turning the paper towards them. Some people fall under multiple categories.”

“I don’t think I follow,” Pixis said looking at the list of names.

I turned the paper back around towards me, “Remember my plan from earlier?” I asked and they both nodded. “Well, if we use that as an example, say Mina agreed then she would become an essential part of the plan. Erwin would be an essential part of the plan because he’s our way there and our way back. Hanji would be essential because she can heal people.”

“Okay and what about the other things you said?” Pixis asked, wanting me to elaborate more.

“Well, some people’s powers work really well for fighting. For example Jean’s fire. While some people's powers work better for defense like Annie’s. Some could even be both. Like Sasha’s doubles could easily fight but could also defend by shielding people. People who need defense are maybe people who are essential or background fighters.”

“And what do background fighters do?” Pixis asked.

“Well, background fighters are the people who aren’t fighting hand to hand combat but are still fighting. For example Ymir or Christa.”

“I can sort of understand why Ymir would be considered that but Christa?” Pixis questioned.

“Well, she isn’t the type to run up and punch someone in the face, however, her power makes it easy for her to fight people without ever laying a finger on them.”

“In his thoughts, he has me classified as a background fighter as well as a normal fighter,” Levi said, pretty much begging for me to explain why.

“Well, you can easily use your telekinesis against someone in a fight, but you could also use your empath abilities so-,” I let my voice drift out as he nodded his head.

“I see now.”

“Okay,” So where I think we should start is by titling everyone under these categories,” I suggested.

“Alright let’s do it,” Pixis nodded.

We took a few minutes and put everyone into categories. F being fighters BF being background fighters, D being defense, ND being needs defense, and lastly, E being essential.

“Let’s start with group A,” I said feeling a little confidence in our ability to make teams with this new system.

“Okay team A will be your team,” Pixis said and it caught me off guard. I would have assumed his team would be team A. I could tell Shadis was confused too. “Choose who you want and explain your reasoning.”

“Okay,” I said before looking to Levi. “Well, obviously I want Levi first off.”

“Well, I figured that was already decided,” Pixis laughed.

“As for the rest of the team,” I look at the list of names and shrugged, “Jean and Marco,” I said before looking for the last person.

“Why those two?”

“Well, they both are marked as fighters and defense. I figured since I’m marked as a fighter and Levi is marked as a fighter and background fighter that it would be a strong team.” It’s because I know for a fact that we would all be the ones to charge ahead and probably be the front line fighters so we might as well all be on a team and do it together. I turned to Levi. How would I tell him that without both Shadis and him thinking we are a bunch of reckless idiots.

“I think what Eren’s trying to say is that we need a strong team to lead the way and break through the enemy's forces as well as defend other teams that have less of a fighting role,”Levi said and I gave his hand a squeeze under the table. Thank you babe you're a lifesaver.

“I see,” Pixis nodded, as for your last teammate.

“Hmmm.” I looked over the list. Levi who do you think is reckless enough to run straight to the fight with us.

“That’s a long list,” he mumbled, making Pixis give us a look of confusion.

You’re right, almost everyone on these lists are reckless idiots. Wait that could actually make grouping them together easier. I saved that thought for later before looking at the few people who I know would have no trouble running straight in. I checked what we marked them under. We needed someone else who was marked as fighter or defense but preferably both.

“Annie and Mikasa have those marks,” he said and I shook my head.

They aren’t stupid enough to run straight in with us. I thought to him. “I have other plans for them,” I said with an innocent smile to stop Pixis from being too confused.

Levi and I took another look at the list. “Sasha,” Levi pointed out.

“Perfect,” I mumbled.

“Why Sasha?” Pixis asked.

“She is also marked as a fighter and defense, so it will be easy for her to keep up with our group.”

“Okay, so that's team A now for team B,” Pixis said.

“Alright, let’s work on your team,” I said and he nodded.

“So you will be team leader obviously,” I said before thinking who would work well with him. “Shadis you should be on his team too.”

“I thought that was a given,” Shadis said looking at Pixis.

Pixis just shrugged and said, “Well it is now,” he said.

“Who else?” Shadis asked.

“Mina, Erwin, and Armin,” I responded quickly. I thought we would do his team first so I had already figured it out.

“Why those three?” Pixis asked. He seemed very confused about my choice.

“Well, all three of them we have labeled essential. I think these three are the most essential since they are the start of the whole mission without them we would be up shits creek without a paddle. I feel like you and shadis would be better at defending those three than anyone else. Both of your powers could easily cover Mina and Erwin while they are unconscious at the beginning.”

“I see your point,” Pixis said, thinking it all over. “What about team C? Who are they and what are their roles?”

“I think Hanji should be the team leader. Besides the insanity, she’s a really good leader. She knows when she needs to be serious.”

“Okay, who else?”

“Well, I think since Hanji is essential and we have her marked under needs defense we should put her with Mikasa and Annie.”

“Wait why does Hanji need defense? She is fully capable of defending herself.” Shadis said. I knew he had tuned us out while we were labeling everyone earlier.

“That is true she can defend herself, however, she is going to be tending to the wounded prisoners she might not be able to watch her back and tend to them which is why we put her under needs defense,” I explained… again.

“Oh that makes sense,” he mumbled.

“I think the other two on her team should be Hanna and Franz.” I could see the look on Pixis’s face he was going to ask me to explain. “Hanna would be able to help guard Hanji and keep enemies away from her and Franz. Franz could replicate Hanji’s powers and help her heal the prisoners to take some of the strain off of her.”

“I like it.” He nodded. “And that makes the last team Reiner, Ymir, Christa, Connie, and Berthold.”

“Yup. Berthold will be team leader, they all get along with each other, and Ymir is the only one on the team who needs defense and both Christa and Reiner were marked as defence.” I said and he nodded.

“Okay so what will everyone be doing exactly in this plan of yours,” Shadis asked, still a little skeptical.

“So it will start with team B or your team. Mina and Armin will take out the guard in the room while Erwin uses astral projection to check out the control room so we can portal ourselves in. Once inside your team will stay in the control room while Mina either deactivates the cameras or uses them to our advantage.”

“While your team is working Ymir will help Armin by swiping any keys and having the spirits pass them on to him. Once all the keys are in our possession that’s when team A will start heading towards the prisoners with team C and D behind us.”

“We will take out the guards in the section with the red and green badges first leaving team C behind to take care of the prisoners there. Team D will finish up the last of the fight in there as we move to the blue badges section and take on the guards there. After team D incapacitates the guards in that section they will join us in the other section.”

“When team C is done looking after the prisoners they will send them your way so your team can portal them to safety. They will meet up with us at the blue badge section and check on the prisoners there. Once they finish with the prisoners there we will all come back your way.”

“At least that's a rough draft of the plan things can change, but that’s the best idea I’ve got so far,”

“That sounds reckless and stupid,” Shadis said and Pixis raised his hand to cut him off.

“No, it sounds like the best idea we’ve heard so far. Sure it might be a little reckless, but we haven’t had any better ideas.” He said to Shadis before turning to me. “Do you think we can pull this off. Really and truly?”

I took a moment and thought about our odds. “It would be a long shot, but hey we have more people coming to help. I say with them we will have a better chance and could possibly pull it off.”

“That's all I need to know,” he nodded.

“Do we know how many people are coming?” I asked.

“Yes, they are a group of seven,” he answered, “ but that's about as much as I know about them.”

“Wait what? You don’t know anything about these people?” I asked.

“Nope not really aside from the fact they are willing to help and need a safe place to stay.”

“What do you mean you don’t know anything about them!” I yelled, shooting out of the chair. “What if they are spies? What if they aren’t really exiles what if-,”

“Eren please,” Levi said, grabbing my hand and giving it a squeeze.

“But-.”

“Baby,” he whispered. I took a deep breath and plopped back down in the chair.

“What do you know about them?” I mumbled.

“Not a whole lot, I know a few of their code names, however, the group with the three younger exiles that we rescued recommended and spoke very highly of them,” he said.

I felt a little better knowing that but not enough to fully trust these people. They were going to be under the same roof as us and he didn’t even know their real names.

“They don’t know us either and think of it this way. They are on the run and are scared. There are a lot more of us than there are them,” Levi whispered in my ear and I rolled my eyes.

I guess you’re right. God, I hate when you’re right. I let out a sigh before giving Pixis a nod. “Okay, we will add them to the plan after I get to know their powers.

“Thank you for having a more open mind,” he said with a nice smile.

“We should go check with everyone now and fill them in on the plan that we have so far,” I said before standing up and heading out of the office with Levi trailing behind me.

Pixis and Shadis followed us out of the room and told us they would be doing the nightly check-in with everyone so we didn’t have too.


	22. Explaining the Plan

As we walked towards the rooms I could reel Levi’s exhaustion radiating off of him. I let out a yawn as his exhaustion started to wear me down.

“Don’t you fucking dare,” he glared at me.

“It’s your fault,” I mumbled.

“I was trying so hard-,” he was cut off by a yawn, “dammit Eren,” he rolled his eyes.

“Babe, go to bed then,” I said as I headed to Mina’s room.

“And let you be reckless as shit by yourself not a damn chance,” he grumbled, “you’ll convince them to do some reckless ass shit without me stopping you.”

Someone’s grumpy.

“Shut the fuck up.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“You were thinking it.”

“Well then get the fuck out of my head,” I said looking at him crossing my arms.

Levi just took a deep slow breath as his eyes glared daggers into me. Man, I’m sure glad I can’t hear his thoughts because I’m pretty sure all I would hear is the missions of ways he can murder me in my sleep.

He didn’t say anything, but he did smile at my thought. Hmm, maybe I should stay awake tonight for my own safety.

“Oh don’t worry about staying awake I’ll make sure to keep you up all night long,” he whispered deviously in my ear and I felt a shiver run down my spine.

Now I have another reason to be scared. Great, I'm going to die tonight one way or another.

We made it to Mina’s room and she invited us in. She seemed a little confused to see us. “Pixis said you would be going to people and talking to them about a plan, but me?” she asked as she took a seat on her bed. She pulled her legs up and crossed them under her.

“You are the glue that holds this whole plan together, well, that is if you want to be,” I said, trying not to put so much pressure on her. I didn’t want to force her to be a part of this plan if she didn’t want to. “You don’t have to agree with this plan if you don’t want to do this then it’s okay. It could be very stressful.” I told her right off the bat.

“I want to hear the plan,” she nodded.

We calmly explained the plan and the groups we have made for this plan. She stayed quiet the whole time only asking a few questions here and there until we finished explaining.

I would kill to have Levi’s power right about now she seemed to be thinking everything over but I couldn’t read her. Was she going to agree to the plan? I mean it’s putting a lot on her shoulders. I would understand if she said no, but at the same time, I want to know what she’s thinking. Maybe-.

I felt Levi elbow me. “Can you stop rambling in your head you’re giving me a headache,” he mumbled in annoyance.

Sorry. I thought before trying to calmly clear my head waiting for an answer.

“Hmm,” Mina finally said, “that is stressful,” she took a deep breath, “but if you think this plan will work then I’m in.”

“Are you sure?” I was actually pretty surprised that she agreed to it. She hardly ever goes on missions and usually when she does she stays in the background as much as possible.

“I’m sure. Everyone will be doing their part to raid the camp and I want to do my part too. If this is what you need me to do then I will do it.”

She asked a few more questions about the team she will be in and her part of the plan. I made sure to tell her that the plan isn’t set in stone. I also mentioned that she doesn’t have to worry about memorizing her part just yet until we finish talking with everyone else and make sure that this is the plan we are going with.

We headed to the next person's room. We made our way down the line of rooms filling in everyone and making sure they all agreed with their part of the plan. I was surprised that there were no protests this time around about everyone's roles.

“I’ve noticed something that probably has something to do with it,” Levi mumbled as we headed to the second to last room. I looked at him waiting for him to finish explaining. “Ilsa’s been on most people's mind tonight, and they all seem determined to bring her back home by any means. The ones that don’t know her still have her name on their minds. They know that everyone else knows this person and that bringing her home safe would make us happy so they are going along with it.”

That makes more sense. I nodded as we walked into Sasha and Connie's room.

“Oh, so we are a part of your plan?” Sasha said plopping down on the bed after seeing us. “I was hoping to see you tonight,” she grabbed Connie's hand and pulled him back so he was sitting on the bed too.

He just gave an awkward smile before waiting for us to address them. “Actually, I only want to talk to Connie-,” I couldn’t finish my sentence before Sasha jumped off the bed.

“You what!”

I raised my hands and gave her an awkward smile, “can I explain before you decided to kill me?” I asked. She paused and then nodded.

“Fine proceed,” she sighed.

“I only want to talk to Connie because he’s in a different team as you, however, we will talk to you after, but in a different room,” I said and I could feel Levi staring into the back of my skull.

Look I’m doing this in a different way than all the others because it’s my team I know how reckless I can be. I want to let them know what they are getting into flat out so nothing catches them by surprise. I thought to Levi.

I explained the plan to Connie before having Sasha follow me. We headed to Jean and Marco’s room. I knocked and asked them if they wanted this little meeting to happen in their room or in Levi and mine.

“Well, we are already here so we might as well do it now,” Jean rolled his eyes. “I'm assuming this is about the mission,” he said plopping back on the bed laying his head in Marco’s lap. Marco just smiled and ran his fingers through Jean’s hair.

“So why did I need to come with you rather than you just briefing me in my own room?” Sasha asked.

“Because everyone in this room is on my team.” When I said that Jean sat up.

“Oh lord help us we’re going to die,” he said putting his hands together and praying.

Sasha just shook her head, “so what does that mean?” she asked, still clueless.

“Well, I know how reckless I can be when the missions feel personal and this one is very personal. I wanted to brief all of you at once and make sure you all know what you’re getting into. If you want to be put on a separate team I will make sure to change it. I’m letting you all know that whoever is on my team will be dragged to the front lines of the fight and will be in the most danger. So knowing that, do you still want to be on my team.” I asked looking around the room.

“Well, duh, someone has to make sure you don’t get yourself killed. I mean no offense Levi, but I know you won’t stop him so someone has too,” Jean rolled his eyes.

I looked at the other two to get their answers. “Well, Jean’s going so I kinda have to,” Marco shrugged, “this won’t be the first time I followed you guys into harm's way, and hopefully this won’t be the last.”

I looked to Sasha and she just shook her head, “you’re stupid,” she said looking dead into my eyes. “Like hello, this is personal for all of us you better believe I’m staying on this team. Ever since I heard Ilsa’s name I’ve been wanting to crack some skulls and now you’re telling me that this team is going to do just that. You’re stupid to think I would want to change teams,” she said and I smiled.

“I figured you say something along the lines of that. That's why I chose all of you because I know you re as stupid and reckless as me… Well, not you Marco you just have a stupid and reckless boyfriend,” I said and he gave me a nod in agreement.

I turned to Levi. “You’re the last one I need your approval,” I said making sure he is willing to stay on this team of stupid suicidal people.

“I want to say I’m only saying yes for the same reason that Marco is, however, I know that would be a lie. I want to get Ilsa back as much as you, and I am willing to do whatever it takes to do so. So count me in.” He said and we were all in agreement.

“Now, I didn’t tell Pixis that this team is going to be stupid and reckless, however, I did bullshit and excuse for us to take the front lines. So keep quiet about the reckless stuff okay?” I asked.

“My lips are sealed,” Sasha said, gesturing a zipper in front of her mouth.

“Don’t worry, I’ll keep my mouth shut,” Jean said and we all turned to Marco.

“What reckless stuff? We’re just doing our part,” he smiled with an innocent shrug.

“Good. I’ll keep you all filled in separately like we did tonight. That's it, for now, we will talk more tomorrow,” I said and we all nodded. We walked Sasha out and watched as she made her way back to her room before heading to ours.


	23. All Night

The second we walked in the room I thought Levi would collapse from exhaustion. That apparently wasn’t the case. One minute I’m walking through the door the next I’m pinned to the bed with him on top of me.

“I told you I’d help keep you awake all night, remember,” he whispered deviously in my ear before nipping at it.

Danger!

“What’s wrong babe? You scare I might bite?” Levi asked seductively.

“Yes.”

“Good you should be,” he said before biting my neck.

It’s been a while since we’ve last been able to have the night to ourselves. With back to back missions, training, sparing, and checking up on the others I didn’t realize how sexually frustrated we have both been until now. I felt as the exhaustion faded from both of us and was replaced with pure lust.

I pulled Levi in for a rough passionate kiss. His hands glided down my body until they were placed at my hips. His leg slipped in between my legs and I felt as he pressed his knee lightly up against me.

I grinded against his knee and he pulled away from the kiss. “Are you having fun?” He asked, staring at me with a smug smile.

“Not yet,” I said, daring him to pick up the pace.

“Oh really,” he said. His other leg was placed between mine and he swiftly moved my legs up over his arms. He pulled me closer to him and grinded up against me before leaning forward and biting my neck. “Then let’s show you a really good time yeah,” he said as one hand rubbed me through my pants and the other pulled my hips closer to him as he grinded up against me.

Oh god, I bit my lip and closed my eyes. I have to be quiet. The last thing I want is anyone hearing me but damn it feels so good. Are you just going to keep teasing me or are you going to fuck me? I thought, opening my eyes and looking at Levi.

“I can do both,” Levi said before pulling my shirt over my head.

“Great,” I sighed. Why do you like tormenting me so much?

“Because it’s fun,” he smiled and I rolled my eyes.

Asshole. He pulled my pants and boxers off, setting them down with my shirt. He pulled his own shirt off and threw them all to the side before using his power to put them in the dirty clothes bag we have. Neat freak. I rolled my eyes

He picked me up with his power and flipped me over before pinning my arms above my head with one hand while moving my hips upwards with his other. “You wanna try that again?”

“I said you’re a neat freak,” I repeated out loud this time. His grip on my arms got tighter and the next thing I felt was a literal pain in the ass. “Did you just bite my ass?” I asked, trying to look behind me.

“Maybe,” he said with a smug tone.

“Prick.”

“Oh, you want a prick I’ll give you a prick.”

Danger. “Wait that's not what I-” I was forced to bite my lip as I felt a cold finger slip inside me.

“You might have to wait a minute for it though, we don’t want to hurt you now do we,” he said and I could hear that stupid smug smile in his voice.

I don’t even know when he managed to grab the bottle of lube, then again he might have just used his power to get it. Cheater.

“Call me what you want but I can hear your thoughts begging me to fuck you so hard that you can’t walk tomorrow.”

Shit, why must my own thoughts betray me. I felt as he added another finger. I closed my eyes and bit down on my lip a little harder. I could feel the pleasure he was getting from teasing me by going ever so slowly. You really do like watching me suffer.

“Only when I know you’re enjoying it too.”

Enjoying suffering yeah that makes sense. My thoughts were sarcastic as I rolled my eyes.

“Say what you want but I’m hearing your thoughts and feeling your emotions you little masochist.”

“Fucking sadist,” I mumbled.

He just let out a laugh. Damn, he didn’t even deny it.

“Neither did you.”

He pulled out his fingers and I saw a condom float over our way. He let me go for a moment as he pulled off his pants and boxers. I rolled over to face him as he slid on the condom and looked up at me, “You ready?”

“Hell yes.”

He positioned himself before sliding into me. I let out a soft moan before biting down on my lip. He paused for a moment to make sure I was okay before continuing. He pushed in a little further until he was all the way in. He slowly pulled out and thrusted back in a little faster this time.

“Babe,” I moaned out before covering my mouth with my hand.

He put a hand on my hip guiding my body where he wanted it while his other hand was placed on the mattress next to me for support. I wrapped one of my arms behind his neck and the other under his arm and around his back.

He’s keeping an aggravatingly slow pace and I can feel myself getting impatient. “Baby please,” I said, grinding my hips against him to try and get him to move faster.

“Please what?” he said, keeping his slow pace.

“Fuck me harder,” I groaned

Without another word, he flipped me over so that I was laying on my stomach with my ass facing him. He thrusted into me and picked up his pace. I could barely hold in my moans as my body flooded with pleasure.

My hands gripped at the blanket on the bed. I bit into my lip hard to try and silence my moans, but it wasn't working they kept slipping through. Levi kept up the pace as I rocked my hips against his. In a desperate attempt to silence myself I bit down on the blanket in front of me as Levi continued to pound into me.

I felt both his hands slid to my hips as he pulled me closer with every thrust fucking me harder and deeper every time. My own hand stroking myself to match his thrusts.

I can't. I thought to him as the blanket slipped out of my mouth. Before the moan could escape my lips his hand covered my mouth. He stuck his fingers in my mouth to keep me from moaning out and waking everyone in the nearby rooms.

"Bite down," he whispered in my ear and I did just that.

I could tell we were both close. Good, I don't know how much more of this I can take before I end up accidentally waking everyone up.

I couldn't hold back any longer. I used my hand to stop any fluids from getting on the bedsheets as I hit my limit.

After another minute Levi had hit his too. He slid off the condom and used his powers to clean up all of the mess from both of us before tying it and throwing it in our trash bag.

"That's disgusting," I whispered watching him use his power.

"Whatever," he rolled his eyes before laying back on the bed.

I let out a yawn feeling the exhausted come back and hit me hard.

"What happened to staying up all night?" Levi asked with a devious grin.

"We aren't doing it again tonight," I glared at him.

"Why not?"

"Well, for one my back is already killing me. Besides, I'm tired, and I know you are too," I said before laying my head on his chest. I traced my fingers along his scars and placed a kiss on them. 

"Why do you always do that?" He asked, watching me.

Because I love you and everything about you. "I know you used to hate them-."

"Used too?" Levi raised an eyebrow.

"You know what I mean. You were way more self-conscious about them and every time you took your shirt off you were afraid that I would judge you. Now you don't care about that and I like to show you that I don't mind your scars."

"It's not that I don't care, it's just that you don't stare at them like other people usually do. Most people are disgusted by them, myself included-."

"You shouldn't be. They are proof that you are strong. They are proof that you survived and are still alive." I ran my fingers over the burn scars and deep scars where parts of the glass from the accident had cut him deep. "I love you, every part of you and I want to show it. That's why I kiss them."

"You're so cheesy," Levi rolled his eyes but gave me a smile and ruffled my hair.

"I know, but now can we get some sleep?" I cuddled up next to him and closed my eyes, not even waiting for an answer.

"Yes baby we can go to sleep now," he said before placing a kiss on my forehead.

"Gdnit" I mumbled already half asleep.

"Goodnight," Levi said back just as I faded into unconsciousness.


	24. Exiled Group

I followed behind Eren as he led the charge through the camp. The others behind us. Everything happened so fast. Fights broke out, we got separated from the rest of the groups, I couldn’t even see the rest of our groups. Just guards closing in on us. I turned around to tell Eren to fall back.

Time slowed to a stop as I saw a guard aim a gun at Eren’s back. I tried to use my powers to stop it, but they weren’t working. I tried to scream out to tell him to duck, but it was too late. Next thing I know he’s in my arms gasping for air. I watched the life drain from his eyes as he took his last forced breath.

I shot up so fast I was light-headed swaying on my feet as I tried to find my balance. My body was drenched in a cold sweat. I looked around the room and saw I was still in Eren’s and my room.

“Baby?” I heard Eren whisper as he stood up and grabbed my hand. I looked into his eyes and felt so relieved it was only a nightmare but it felt so real. I thought I had lost him. He was crying and that's when I realized that my face was wet with tears. I just pulled him into a hug and held him tight.

“Nightmare?” he asked. I just nodded and we sat back on the bed. “Wanna talk about it?”

“No. But I swear to god if you die I’ll have Ymir’s poltergeist friends beat the shit out of you,” I said squeezing him tighter.

“Noted,” he was confused but he just went with it. He thought I was still out of it from my dreams, but I was dead serious.

We heard a knock and both our heads turned towards the doorway. The curtain moved aside a moment later and Pixis stepped inside fully dressed in his costume. “Oh, you’re awake,” he said before looking at us, “am I interrupting something?” he asked.

“No, why are you dressed in your costume?” I mean he had everything on mask and all.

“The group of exiles just arrived. I’ve instructed everyone but a few people to stay in their rooms. Everyone who is going to meet them I’m having them dress in costumes. Which is why I’m here, get suited up, and meet us in the common area.”

“You want us to greet them?” Eren asked. He was especially confused after his meltdown yesterday the last time they were brought up.

“Yes, I need you to get to know them so you know where they fit into your plan,” he said before turning to leave, “I let them know you two would be coming so they wouldn’t be caught off guard.

“Before you go-,” I stopped him in the doorway. “Should I leave my knives off my costume?” I asked. I didn’t want to scare them.

“Well, are they a part of your costume?”

“Yes, but-.”

“Then bring them,” he said blankly.

“But why?”

“I’m sure they have some weapons on them too,” he shrugged, “I have my knife on me.”

“Not a lot of trust going on,” Eren mumbled.

“We need to build trust first,” he said before turning back towards the door, “get dressed. Oh, and Levi, let me know if any of their thoughts are sketchy.”

He left and we did just that. We quickly put on our costumes. Eren was rushing so fast he nearly tripped trying to get his pants on. I could feel his sore back from here, “sorry babe,” I mumbled to him and he just rolled his eyes at me.

The thing that took the longest was Eren’s arm wraps and braces. I couldn’t go too fast while putting them on. I had to slow down and do it right rather than risk them being too loose or too tight and having them cause issues. My knives took a minute to get too. It was mostly about finding where they went on my costume. Once we were dressed we put our masks on and hoods up before heading out of our room to the common area.

I stopped just before we made it there grabbing Eren’s arm. “Wait,” I mumbled before looking at his neck. Shit, where’s Sasha when you need her. I let out a sigh of defeat and just used Jean’s tactic. I pulled Eren’s hood forwards a little and angled it so it covered the bite marks and hickeys on his neck. It didn’t cover them fully, but it was better than before. “Just try not to move around too much, and don’t touch your hood.”

“You’re an ass,” he mumbled a little embarrassed before we continued walking to the common area.

Pixis, Shadis, Hanji, Erwin, and Auruo were there and across from them, there was a group of seven people. Their costumes were similar to each other. They all wore black tennis shoes and black jackets that were left unzipped. They all had navy blue shirts and pants. The only thing that differed from person to person was the bandanas tied around their face. It covered their nose and mouth. Each person wore a different color. I looked at the colors that must be how they identify each other while on missions. Purple, green, red, white, yellow, black, and blue. The three standing in front of the group were Purple, Green, and Yellow. They must be the oldest, or at least the ones in charge.

When we got closer I could feel how tense everyone is. We walked up next to Pixis and stopped. He started introducing us to them by our codenames when I decided to try and read one of their minds. I looked at the Purple bandana since they were the one dead center and closest to us. I tried to listen to their thoughts and instantly I fell to my knee and nearly blacked out.

Eren grabbed my arm and Pixis whipped his head around to look at me. I could feel the air get heavier in the room as Pixis looked to make sure I was okay. He looked angry like he was going to yell at them for attacking one of his teams.

I shook my head at him to tell him not to. “I’m okay, just light-headed,” I whispered to both Eren and Pixis.

Pixis backed off seeming to get the hint that they didn’t attack me on purpose. I made it seem like it was just my power malfunctioning or something. That’s not at all what happened. I prepared myself for one person’s thoughts, not all seven. Even so, seven people’s thoughts aren’t normally enough to bring me to my knees not anymore. Sure it gives me a major headache, but that was more than just a headache. Someone’s power’s at work. How were all seven of their thoughts in one person’s head? I’ve never seen a power like that before.

I focused back on Eren’s thoughts. Most of them were just concerns about me now. I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye and gave him a slight nod to let him know that I’m really okay.

The person in the purple bandana started talking and introducing everyone by their codenames and identifying them by their colors. “Yellow is Mimic, Green is Toxin, White is The Operator, Blue is The Lookout, Black is Blinds, Red is Truth Serum, lastly I’m The Shifter,” she said, speaking mostly to me and Eren. I’m assuming she had already introduced them to Pixis and the others.

“Nice to meet you,” I said awkwardly. Eren stayed quiet but I could tell he was uncomfortable. In more ways than one. He shifted on his feet as his back and hips ached. He wasn’t really worried too much about that, he was more thinking about how awkward it was to be face to face with these people.

“They told us that you needed to speak with us about the mission?” she asked, her voice never changing from a blank yet stern tone.

I looked to Pixis before saying anything. “Why don’t we take this to the conference room,” he suggested.

Perfect that’s exactly what I hoped he would say. Glad he got the hint, at least I think he got the hint? She nodded before having us lead the way. I took this time to focus back on her thoughts. Before I did I made sure to prepare myself for a world of hurt. With my back to them, it was easier to hide any weakness that would show in my eyes. I stayed close to Eren just in case I did underestimate this and blackout.

I took a deep breath and tried again. It hurt like hell, but I was still standing on both legs this time, but just barely. My head was pounding, and my vision was going in and out, but I needed to get information. We need to know whether or not they can be trusted.

Wait, not only are all there their thoughts in one person’s head but they are communicating? How? I stopped my own thoughts from interrupting and started listening.

Nanaba are you sure about this? Another female voice asked. They seem suspicious, do you see how many knives that one guy has on him? Maybe I should take them out.

Rico, I understand that you’re on edge we all are, but they told us we could trust them. Stand down. If we really are all on the same side then we should trust them.

Trust, since when have you trusted anyone outside of our group, a male voice popped up.

Since the person that recommended these people spoke very highly of them. I’ve known this man since we were children. Gunther, I trust him with my life.

But do you trust him with our lives, the man thought again.

I do. If you have a problem with that then you wouldn’t have come with me in the first place.

Hey, hey now you two don’t fight. Remember the kids can hear us. Another man’s voice came through.

Hannes is right, a girl thought.

Yeah we can hear you and we think you are annoying, a younger man thought.

Hitch, Marlowe, knock it off. They are just trying to figure out what’s best for us. Another boy’s voice came through.

Well maybe they can do it a little quieter, the girl thought again.

Thomas, how much longer can you hold this connection up? I think it was Nanaba who asked.

Maybe 15 more minutes at best.

And at worst?

Five minutes.

Great. Multiple voices groaned,

I had to pull my power away from their thoughts as I nearly tripped over my own feet again as I started to get very light-headed. I grabbed Eren’s arm for support as we walked into the conference room.

Well, I wasn’t able to get much information. I got all of their names, but not who they belong to. It seems I was right and one of their powers is at work. The only other thing I figured out aside from that they all bicker like crazy is that this Rico girl might be hostile towards us and that Gunther guy didn’t seem too fond of us either.

We all took our seats and Pixis started talking. I could barely keep my vision straight; it felt like the room was spinning. I had to hold onto Eren’s arm just to feel some sense of stability. I could already feel a head-splitting headache forming. This was going to be a long day.


	25. Masks Off

“I wanted you all to meet Orbit, he is the mastermind behind some of our most brilliant plans. He’s the one responsible for making the plan that rescued the group of exiles. He and Malice Mind were the first to figure out that they were going after civilians, and they are the ones who planned out and went on the mission that got us the information about this camp,” Pixis said introducing us. Man, he was really talking us up.

I looked at Levi to make sure he was feeling okay. I’m not quite sure what is happening, but something is definitely happening. Could they be targeting him because of all his knives? No, he keeps giving my hand a squeeze making sure I know everything is okay. I wish I could hear what he was thinking. I hate being left in the dark, especially at times like this when I need to know what’s going on.

Every time I look at Levi he looks more and more out of it. Is he going to blackout? Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. We shouldn’t have trusted them. He gave my hand a squeeze again.

I get it that means you’re alright, but you don’t look it. Something happened. Did they do something to y-?

“Orbit, would you mind telling them your plan?” Pixis said and I snapped out of my thoughts and looked at all the people staring at me.

Help. I thought to Levi as the room started closing in. I wasn’t used to so many unfamiliar eyes locked onto mine. It was one thing to speak in front of all my friends and people who I’ve lived under the same roof with for years now but people who I don’t even know their names or even their faces. How did Pixis expect me to do this? I can’t do this.

I felt Levi’s hand give mine a tight squeeze under the table and his eyes looked into mine. Stop, now is not the time to panic. If these people really are here to help then we are on the same side. Pixis is counting on me, everyone is counting on me. All I need to do is explain the same plan I’ve been explaining. That’s it, just repeat everything I’ve already said. Don’t think about who you’re repeating it to just imagine that you are talking to Levi and only Levi.

“Well, during our reconnaissance mission,” I started. I explained everything exactly like how I explained it to Pixis when we first pitched the mission. I repeated it nearly word for word trying to just forget all of the eyes watching my every move. The only changes I made were substituting names for code names and powers were only briefly described.

They stayed quiet until the end. Pixis asked if they had any questions. The purple bandana lady spoke up, “what is our group's job?”

“Well, we were planning on adding you to the teams already created by your powers and where they fit with the plan. Pixis explained.

I felt Levi’s hand give mine a quick squeeze under the table. I looked at him to figure out what he wanted since that was clearly meant to get my attention. I looked at him and with his eyes, he quickly looked at one of the other exiles and back to me. I followed his eyes and saw what he wanted me to see. The person in the green bandana looked pissed. I could only see their eyes, but they were staring daggers into Pixis.

“You think that will be the best plan? Having total strangers work together rather than just putting us in a group of our own.” Purple asked.

“Well, it depends. We based this mission based on people's powers even within our own group. We have people here working with people they aren’t working with normally. It will be a learning experience for everyone, however, if it gives us the best outcome then I don’t see a problem.” They were both using passive-aggressive tones as they spoke.

There was a long awkward silence and the room was so tense. I heard Levi let out a loud sigh before standing up. “Look, I know there’s not a lot of trust going around, but if we are going to work together then we are going to have to trust each other.”

He pulled off his hood and mask before reaching his hand out to purple. “I’m Levi, it’s a pleasure to be working with you,” he said.

The room went quiet for a minute before she shook his hand hesitantly. “Nanaba,” she said before pulling her mask down and shaking off her hood.

I just shrugged and followed Levi’s lead pulling mine off, “I’m Eren.” I mentally cursed because I could see some of their eyes instantly look at my neck. Yes, I get it I look like a man whore, get over it.

I looked back towards Pixis and Shadis. Shadis looked pissed at us, but Pixis looked impressed. He pulled off his mask, “I’m Pixis, this is Shadis,” he said, introducing him and pulling off his mask almost like he knew that Shadis wasn’t going to follow along. Hanji and Erwin also pulled off their masks and introduced themselves.

Once we had all finished pulling off our masks Nanaba gave her team a nod and they did the same. Yellow pulled down his mask and gave us a smile, “I’m Hannes.”

Black pulled down her and introduced herself as Hitch. Blue pulled his off and introduced himself as Marlowe. White introduced himself as Thomas.

There were two left and they gave each other a look before Nanaba walked up and pulled their masks down, “this is Rico,” she said introducing Green bandana, “and this is Gunther,” she said introducing Red bandana.

Looks like our group isn’t the only one with stubborn people.

“So how are we separating by powers?” She asked sitting back down at the conference table.

“Well, depending on your power depends on where you will be needed,” Pixis said, looking at me waiting for me to explain the team's dynamics and how we came up with them.

“Well, each team was made by how their power works, and their role in the mission. We put them under categories like how I said Poltergeist would be possessing a guard we labeled her power essential since she is what kick starts this whole plan, however, while she is possessing someone her body is left defenseless so we classified her as needing defense. So we put her with Pixis and Shadis since their powers could easily protect her.” I said trying to explain to the best of my abilities.

“Alright, I think I see what you mean,” she nodded.

"Each team has specific roles too. I briefly explained them in the mission run down. Essentially team B’s main job is to stay behind and watch everyone's backs through the cameras and defend the surveillance room so we have a safe way of escaping.”

“Team A is going to be the front line fighters that push forward through each section of the camp. Team D is going to be the defense fighters finishing off the last of the fights in the area’s that team A hits, they also will be staying closer to team C to keep the guards off them. Lastly team C is going to be the healers and defense team. Their main job is to protect the prisoners and heal them enough so they can walk through the portals.”

“So if we tell you our powers you will be able to put us in certain groups?” Nanaba asked hesitantly.

“Essentially yes, however, if we assign you wrong then feel free to speak up. You all know about your powers more than us so if I assign you as a front line fighter and you feel you are better at defense then let me know and I’ll make the change,” I said trying to be as courteous as I could.

“How much do you need to know about our powers?” Rico spoke up and she sounded really annoyed about the whole thing.

“As much as you can tell us, the more the better,” I said and she glared me down.

“Why? That’s far from fair.” She said and Nanaba turned around and gave her a warning glare. “What, I mean they get to know all about our powers, but we don’t know jack shit about theirs!” She raised her voice. Nanaba looked like she was ready to yell at her.

I didn’t know what to say about that. I ended up just panicking and blurting out, “I have gravity powers.”


	26. Powers and Backlash

“I have gravity powers.” The room went quiet and I continued, “I can increase gravity on things or make them weightless. I can also make gravity fields that push things away or bring things closer. The backlash can be pretty bad when I overdo it so I wear these braces,” I said holding up my arms to show them.

Nanaba just smiled before turning back around to look at Rico who was just staring at me with a blank face. What, did I say something wrong?

“Your turn,” Nanaba said smiling at Rico. I was a little surprised to hear her say that, but I pulled out a pen and a piece of paper to take notes.

She just rolled her eyes and slouched back in the chair, “I’m immune to all poisons, venoms, and gases. I can also emit poisonous gas. I can kill people with it or just incapacitate them. I can make my skin toxic to the touch enough to kill or incapacitate. If I bite people or scratch them it will release venom into their system that if not treated they will be on their ass in 10 seconds and dead in 10 minutes.”

She stopped talking and I knew one thing was for sure I did not want to be on her bad side. “When you say if not treated, do you mean there's a cure?”

“Yeah, but you don’t need to know what it is,” she rolled her eyes. “And I’m not saying my backlash. You don’t need to know.”

Nanaba reached over and pulled up her sleeve exposing a scaly green patch of skin. “Part of her backlash makes her skin really dry. When it cracks it turns green and scaly. As far as we know they are permanent. She also gets very lightheaded and can black out from overuse.”

Rico pulled her arm away and pulled her sleeve back down and glared at Nanaba. “Fucking nosey bitch,” she mumbled.

“Ignore her,” Nanaba whispered mostly to herself.

“Their turn, someone else has to tell us about their power or we won’t talk,” Rico crossed her arms staring at us.

I looked at Levi and before he could start talking Pixis cut him off. “Force fields,” he said before making a small one in front of himself, “I can lift things with them or just use them to protect people,” the force field disappeared and he looked back up at them.

“For backlash, I get bad migraines and it will start to affect my joints especially in my wrists which is why I wear these little braces.” he showed them his arm. His wrist braces only went slightly below his wrists whereas mine went most of the way down my arms. “It’s nothing compared to Eren’s since his can lead to nerve damage, but it does cause accelerating arthritis.”

He looked to Nanaba waiting for her to speak up. “Guess it’s our turn,” she shrugged and then stood up. We watched as she turned into Pixis. Everything matched even the voice. “I can shapeshift into any person I’ve seen and have heard speak. I can also shapeshift into animals though that is harder and more painful. I can also shapeshift into a person that doesn’t exist however, my voice will remain the same as my own.”

We watched as she morphed back to her usual self. Her face winced as she shifted back. “When I overuse my powers the shifting process is a lot slower and more painful rather than everything shifting back all at once I can feel every bone in my body break and rearrange themselves and if I’ve really overdone it, they will stop mid-break and I’ll have to deal with walking around with broken bones for a couple of hours.”

Oh damn, that sounds painful. I thought mine sucked but that sounds horrible.

I watched as Pixis whispered something into Shadis’s ear. Shadis looked unamused but Pixis elbowed him and he started talking.

“I can inflict pain on anyone I look at or paralyze them. I can only affect one person at once, however, I can cause them enough pain so that they will pass out. Hypothetically I should be able to cause them enough pain that their heart stops, but I have never tried to do that before.”

He stopped talking and Pixis rolled his eyes and finished the rest for him, “when he tried to overuse his power he will feel any pain he inflicts on others as well as get sharp pains in his chest and have trouble breathing.”

Hannes was next to speak up. “I can mimic anything, voices, noises, movements. If you were to write something behind your back as long as I can see you and the slightest bit of movement I should be able to mimic it. As for backlash, if I mimic too much noise or voices I can get a really bad sore throat that makes it hard for me to speak or do much of anything, my muscles will also get sore if I mimic too much movement.”

Hanji spoke up next telling them about her power, “as for backlash,” she continued, “I get very fatigued, and if I’m making plants out of thin air it starts to burn away at my body fat and if there’s nothing left to burn away then it will eat at my muscles. As for backlash for healing people, their pain will be transferred over to me/ I’ll feel their injuries and I will feel every cell as they move and heal. It’s quite painful.”

Nanaba was staring down Gunther but he was staying quiet. She just let out a sigh and started talking for him. “He can make people tell nothing but truths or nothing but lies. He can switch between the two but it drains him a lot faster. When he passes his limit he gets strep throat, it’s not contagious to anyone, but it makes it hard for him to talk without severe pain. He also could pass out from fatigue.” Gunther rolled his eyes as she spoke for him. He and Rico really didn’t want to be here and it shows.

Erwin started talking and he told them all about his powers. He let an awkward pause out before continuing on to backlash. “ Mine also drains my energy and I could collapse from fatigue. Also during astral projection, my body has to be in a safe place and must remain undisturbed or I will be snapped back to my body very disoriented with the worst vertigo. Lastly, if I teleport too much or go through too many portals and go past my limit there is a slight chance I won’t come back in one piece.”

Wait what, no one ever told me that. How did he figure that out, you know what I don’t think I want to know. That would have been good to know before teleporting with him for every mission. I gave Levi a look of horror and he just shrugged before whispering, “He said only if he goes over his limit.” Ah yes, that is supposed to make me feel better.

“I can see heat signatures as well as Xrays of people when I want,” Marlowe shrugged, “Backlash is horrible though. It will start with a painful migraine and if I continue the room will start spinning before fading to black. It can last for about an hour.”

An hour of blindness yikes, I’d trip over everything. I thought and Levi leaned in and whispered, “You already do.” Hey. I mean it’s true but you didn’t have to say it.

Auruo started talking. “I can understand every language. I can read it and write it, but I can’t speak more than a few phrases. I get a sore throat, lose my voice, and get a migraine.” He rushed through before looking down at the table.

“Well, um,” Thomas started, “I can connect people's thoughts together. & including myself, 6 without myself. It’s like having built-in radios in your heads, but they can’t be hacked. Once the people are connected all they have to do is think that they want the others to hear it and they will. Each connection has a time limit before it cuts out. If I try and hold it for longer than that then it starts to backlash.” He rubbed the back of his neck.

Is that what brought Levi to his knees? I mean it would make sense. That's why Levi was trying to tell me they weren’t attacking him because they weren’t at least not on purpose. I looked at Levi and he nodded. Well, that explains that.

“When it backlashes it short circuits the language processing part of my brain as well as the part of the brain that controls speech. I can’t understand what people are saying and my words come out all jumbled and don’t end up making much sense.”

When he finished Levi was about to speak when someone cut him off. “My power,” hitch excitedly jumped up with a big smile on her face. She looked happy to be telling us about it, “I can, well, why don’t I just show you?” She asked before looking around the room.

I looked up and we were no longer in the conference room. We were on a boat in the middle of the ocean. I could feel the movement of the waves. God, I’m going to be sick. So she can teleport people too?

“Nice illusion,” Levi said and I looked at him.

“Huh,” she seemed almost shocked, “how- that’s impossible, no one should be able to see through my illusions.” The room went back to normal and sure enough, we were still in the conference room.

“What is your power?” She asked, looking at him.

“I’ll tell you after you explain your powers to everyone else,” he shrugged.

“I can make people see, hear, smell, and feel what I want them too. Whether it’s a big change or a little one. A little one will last longer than a bigger one. My backlash makes me hallucinate, and gives me panic attacks when I do.” She rushed out her explanation. “Now you, how can you see through my powers?”

“Easy,” Levi shrugged. “I didn’t see through your illusion but you told me it was an illusion,” she looked confused. “I have three powers, telekinesis, empathy, and lastly mind-reading,” Levi shrugged, “your mind was practically screaming that it was an illusion.”

Rico jumped up, “so much for trust! You’re reading our minds!” She yelled with her fists balled up ready to fight.

Pixis and Shadis jumped up too. Is that why they were trying to stop Levi from sharing earlier. Did they know they would react this way?

“Look, I will admit earlier I was trying to read your minds, but only to see if you were planning on hurting us. Right now I wasn’t trying to read her mind, but when people have intense emotions my powers get drawn to that person's thoughts. She was really excited and my power snapped to her. I was trying to keep my powers focused on Eren, but sometimes they wander.”

“I don’t want to hear your excuse! They can’t be trusted!” Rico yelled. Nanaba just put her hand out telling her to stop. She gave her a look and she slumped down in her chair. Nanaba didn't seem all to bothered with Levi's powers and actually looked annoyed that Rico was so bothered by it.

“So earlier?” Nanaba asked as she looked at Levi, “Is that why you were brought to your knees?”

“Yes and no,” he shrugged. “I was trying to read your mind, but I was hit with all of your thoughts, now I know that’s because of your power,” Levi said looking at Thomas. “Your power is strong normally 7 people's thoughts wouldn’t bring me to my knees but your power did.”

“What’s your backlash?” Nanaba asked with a curious tone.

“Well, for empath abilities it makes them stronger on myself and it causes my emotions to basically be so intense that my mind shuts down. Telekinesis backlash can tear muscles and make me blackout. Mind reading backlash can make me blackout. I can get bloody noses from all of them and I get severe migraines. It knocks the wind out of me and can easily bring me to my knees and gives me chest pain.” Levi said.

“And that's what we do know, he’s only really ever overused his mind-reading, so we don’t know if any of his other abilities have worse backlashes,” I added.

She nodded before changing the topic. “Okay, based on that information you’ll be able to put us into teams?” Nanaba asked.

“I should be able to but I’m going to need some time,” I said awkwardly.

“Well how about we show them to their rooms and you can tell them when you’re ready,” Pixis suggested.

“That’s fine with me,” Nanaba said.

We all stood up and they were about to head out of the room when Nanaba walked back in and walked up to me she leaned into my ear before whispering, “here this should help,” she discreetly handed me something and then followed the others out of the room. I looked down at what she handed me and saw it was makeup.

“Concealer, it matches your skin tone apparently,” Levi snickered. Why would she give me- fuck, the hickeys. I said, pulling my jacket up to hide them.

“The bite marks too,” Levi laughed.

“Fuck you,” I hissed.

“Maybe later, I’m tired right now,” he said before walking out of the room. I just let out a long sigh before we head back to our room to plan. I was going to talk to Pixis first to make sure he’s okay with where I put them in the plan before talking to them.

I plopped down on the bed and looked through all my notes. Levi looked like he was ready to pass out.

“No no, don’t you dare fall asleep, I’m going to need your help with this.”

“Ugh fine,” Levi rolled over propping his head up on his hands and looking at my notes. “Let’s do this quickly, I’m exhausted.”

“It’s not even noon,” I rolled my eyes.

“Exactly, it’s way too early for me to be up and besides my head still hurts from early,” he pouted.

“Well, suck it up,” I said avoiding his eyes knowing I would change my mind by looking into them. “The faster we get this done the faster you can take a nap.”


	27. Anxious

“I think we did fine babe,” Levi said for the third time now.

“But what if I put someone in a group that doesn’t fit them?”

“Then they will tell you,” he sighed, “no need to worry so much. Let’s just run them by Pixis and the others already so I can take a goddamn nap,” he groaned.

“But-,”

“Eren if you say but one more fucking time Imma smack the shit out of you,” Levi glared at me. I just closed my mouth and gave him a pout. “Look, everything will be fine, you’ve done this several times now this is no different.”

“Bu-,” I started to say only to see Levi glaring at me. “I mean, it is different this time. Everything is different. I’m not even sure if I made these teams right. The only reason I can make teams in the first place is because I know everyone, what they can do, what they can’t, however, I don’t know them. I don’t know their personalities, their powers. Sure I know what they told me, but that doesn’t tell me everything. I haven’t seen how they fight or how they act in combat. I know nothing.”

“And that’s okay,” Levi said, putting a hand on my shoulder, “You don’t have to know everything. You are supposed to work with what you do know and sure you may not know a lot about them, but this is why we are bringing it up with them so they can let you know more and we can go from there. No one is saying you have to get this perfect on the first try. All you need to do is give us a good place to start."

I just let out a long sigh. I know Levi’s right, but the thought of making a mistake right now is so nerve-racking especially since Pixis talked me up as this skillful strategist. In reality, I don’t know what I’m doing I’m just spitballing dumb ideas.

“Dumb ideas that work and save our asses most of the time.”

I rolled my eyes. “I mean I guess, but still I wouldn’t call that skill, just dumb luck.”

“Well your dumb luck is what’s going to save Ilsa and everyone else at the camp,” he placed a kiss on my cheek, “that’s the end goal the sooner you tell them the plan the sooner we can act. So suck it up, babe.”

I took a deep breath and looked down at the notes reading through them one last time before giving Levi a nod. “Okay, I’m ready.” I stood up and we headed towards Pixis’s room.

“Wait,” Levi said, grabbing my arm.

“What? You were the one trying to get me to go to Pixis and now you want me to wait?”

“Shut up we’re making a short pitstop.”

Levi dragged me to Sasha and Connie’s room for some reason. “Knock knock,” Levi said before walking in.

They were both just sitting on the bed looking bored out of their minds. They were fully dressed in their costumes though.

“Hey, you were allowed out of your rooms?” Sasha asked sitting up, “Does that mean we can leave too?”

“Yeah we’re bored,” Connie added.

“You aren’t allowed out of the room?” I asked.

“Pixis said we had to stay in here until he figures out if the new group is okay to be around.”

“He must be waiting until we place them in the plan to talk to everyone else,” I whispered to Levi and he nodded.

“Wait have you guys met them?” She asked sitting up. “Are they nice? Do they have really cool powers and codenames?”

“Yes we met them, they seem okay to me, yes and yes,” I said answering her questions. Before she could as anymore Levi cut in.

“Sasha, I have a favor to ask.”

“What do you need?”

Levi pulled out the bottle of concealer that Nanaba had given me. I thought I left it in the room but he must have grabbed it. “Can you fix him up he keeps getting weird stares,” Levi said, pulling my hood away so it wasn’t covering my neck anymore. I had just fixed it so that they wouldn’t show and here he is showing everyone.

“Good God,” she started laughing, “Don’t tell me you greeted them like this,” she asked.

“Blame him, he's the one who went to town,” I rolled my eyes.

“I can see that,” she snickered before taking the concealer.

“Alright,” she pushed me down on the bed and straddled my lap. Deja vu.

“I need to teach you guys how to do this so you don’t have to come to me every time.”

“This is the first time we have willingly come to you for this,” Levi rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, and I don’t think it will be the last. I wonder do you guys just do this on purpose to get me to sit on your lap because if that’s the case all you have to do is ask,” she said with a flirty smile.

“Connie’s right there you know?” I rolled my eyes.

“And I don’t mind one bit,” he laughed. 

"You're only saying that because you like watching us uncomfortably squirm."

"Pretty much, I mean have you seen your faces you guys get so awkward."

“All done,” she said, hopping off of me. “Where’d you get this concealer? It matches your skin tone perfectly.”

“One of the exiles gave it to me.”

“Really, that’s so sweet of them, but why did they have one that matches you?"

"Probably has something to do with her power, she's a shifter, she seemed like she had more makeup on her than just that," Levi spoke up.

"That's so cool. What else do they-," Sasha was about to start with another round of questions when I cut in.

“Anyway, thanks but we have to get going. I think the faster we get this information to Pixis the faster you guys can come out of your rooms." I wasn't sure how true this statement was but I knew it was the quickest way for us to get out of there without her bombarding us with more questions about them.

"Well then what are you waiting for, get out of here!" She said excitedly as she pushed us out of the room.

While we were walking away Levi nudged me with his elbow, "nice job, you got us in and out of there without too much of a hassle."

"You're the one who made us go in there in the first place," I mumbled, rolling my eyes.

We headed straight to Pixis and Shadis's office. When we walked in they seemed to be waiting for us. Shadis was sitting in his own chair he didn't even look interested to hear what we had to say. He looks angry? Maybe he's still mad about earlier when we pulled off our masks or when PIxis pulled his off? Pixis, on the other hand, greeted us with a smile.

"Finished?" he asked. 

"I think," I said, plopping down in the chair to run through the teams with them. 

“Well, let’s have a look.” He leaned in as I placed my notes on the table.

He looked at the paper and read through it for a moment and then looked back up at me with a very confused look. “Interesting,” he said, dragging out the word. Oh no he hates it. “Do you want to explain why?”


	28. Reasoning for the Teams

“Well, based on the notes I took from their powers I did the same method we used for picking out teams,” I explained. “I broke down their powers into the categories and decided where to place everyone based on that. I also moved some people around based on their attitudes and personalities based on Levi’s analysis and what I picked up on.”

“That makes a little more sense,” Pixis said, but he didn’t sound very convincing. “I’m just a little confused about how you came to this conclusion based on that?”

“Which ones confuse you the most?” I asked, trying to narrow it down hopefully.

“Well,” he paused for a moment and read through the teams again, “all of them.”

He hates them. Great. I knew I wouldn’t be able to do this right. I probably messed this all up. Why did he tell them I could do this I can’t do-.

I snapped out of my thoughts with a smack to the back of my head. “I told you I already have a fucking headache stop with the spiraling,” Levi rolled his eyes at me before taking a deep breath. “Just explain the thought process to him,” he said in a calmer tone.

Pixis was looking at me even more confused now probably since Levi just knocked me upside the head. “Well, what group should I start with,” I said trying to find a place to start since he didn’t really give me much to go on.

“Let’s just start with team A,” he mumbled.

“Okay, so for my team, I choose to add Hitch and Marlowe,” I said and watched as his brow furrowed and his eyes trailed off trying to wrap his head around these choices.

“I see that,” he mumbled, “why?”

“Well, team A is the front line team they will be dealing with the most enemies yes?”

“Yeah, and because of that you said you wanted to keep that team as mainly fighters, but Marlowe you have marked as needing defense, and Hitch is defense and a background fighter.”

“Well, earlier I did want that team to be just fighters, and I thought about putting Rico on our team, but then I switched it for two main reasons. Firstly she was one of the ones I switched for personality reasons because I think in our team she would get carried away to easily. Levi noticed she was very rash and stubborn. Putting her in the front lines would be a bad thing.”

“And the second reason?” Pixis asked.

“Well, her power would be great in fighting, however, it’s hard to say how good she is at directing that power. We don’t know much about it and she could easily put her team in danger, we moved her to team D because it will be easier for her to use her power and put a little more distance between her team and her since there will be fewer enemies. Not to mention that team D is filled with some equally as stubborn people, but we will get back to the people we changed based on personality.

“There’s technically a third reason,” Levi added, “we focused more on Hitch and Marlowe’s powers and saw they were a better fit.”

“Okay, how?” Pixis said he still seemed confused but he seemed to understand why we didn’t pick Rico which seemed like the obvious choice.

“Well, like I said before we are the front line fighters we are the ones running into the most enemies. We need to know where those enemies are.”

“I see,” Pixis nodded, “so you need Marlowe to be able to tell you when to watch your backs, and when the coast is clear?”

“Exactly,” I nodded. “And as for Hitch, if there are too many enemies for us to handle all at once her powers will make it easy to distract some of them while we deal with others. It's easier to fight five enemies at a time than thirty.”

“That makes more sense now, as for team B?” he looked back at the list.

“Well, your team’s main job is to kickstart the whole mission and defend the surveillance room so we have a safe exit point. So I figured that Nanaba would be the best to help kickstart the mission.”

“How so?”

“We need to get the keys to unlock the cells and different rooms. So far we had Ymir and Armin doing that, but they probably won’t be able to get all of them. We are going to have to knock out the guards in the surveillance room anyway so Nanaba can steal their clothes and shift into them. She then can go out and try and grab the keys speeding the process along.”

“I see, and Hannes?” he said looking at the other name on the list.

“Well, I’m going to be perfectly honest, there were two people where we couldn’t find any specific rolls for with their powers, and we were going to put them both in your team because your team is in the safest area, however, we changed one of them to team C for attitude reasons,” I explained with an awkward shrug. I expected Pixis to be a little mad that I couldn’t find places for them but instead, he just nodded.

“Makes sense, not everyone’s powers fit with certain missions,” he mumbled. “Well, speaking of team C let’s move on. I’m assuming Gunther is the other person you were talking about?” He said pointing at team C

“Yes, but we will come back to him. We put Thomas on team C because he needs defense and Mikasa and Annie can easily keep him safe. We also put him under essential because with his power it will be easy to connect all the teams together so they can get orders and keep in contact with everyone. His power will come in handy.”

“I like that idea,” Pixis nodded.

“And lastly we’re going to go back to Gunther and Rico and why they were placed in these teams.”

“Alright.”

“Gunther’s power can’t really hurt anyone, however, his attitude tells us that he really doesn’t trust us and doesn’t want to be here. I don’t think it’s likely that he will turn on us, however, in case something like that ends up happening I put him with Mikasa and Annie because they will easily be able to defend the others from him since he’s only really a threat with hand to hand combat.”

“And I assume you put Rico in D for the same reason right?”

“Yes sir.”

“Who in that team will be able to defend against her powers?”

“Christa. She doesn’t need to be near her to stop her and she can do it with a single word,” I explained.

“Well, these teams make a lot more sense now that they are explained, however, how are you going to explain some of these to them?” He asked.

“I haven’t the slightest idea,” I blurted out. The last thing I wanted to do is to tell them that we didn't have any use for their powers, that just sounds rude. Not to mention that we put someone of them in groups purely based on the fact that we don't trust them and need to make sure someone can take them down if they decided to betray us. Telling them that definitely won't go over well, but I have to tell them something especially after Pixis made a big deal about talking me up to them.


	29. Their Roles

Pixis just shrugged “we’ll figure something out,” he said before standing up. He had us follow him back to the conference room while Shadis went to grab them.

I could feel a headache coming on despite only focusing on Eren’s thoughts. I must have overdone it earlier. That power was a lot stronger than I thought and it wiped me out. We sat down in the chair and I leaned my head on Eren’s shoulder and felt my eyes start to close. I just wanted to rest. Can they hurry up so I can go back to the room and take a nap?

Eren let out a yawn and I was about to curse him out when he started talking. “Baby, if you’re that tired then just go to bed. You don’t have to force yourself to stay awake.”

Like hell, I don’t his anxiety is through the roof. If I leave him in here with Pixis and Shadis he’ll freeze up or something. “I’m fine,” I said, picking my head up off his shoulder. It took me a moment to pry my eyes back open. I tried to fight the yawn that forced its way out anyway.

“You sure about that?” He raised an eyebrow,

“Positive,” I said, clenching my eyes shut and taking a deep breath to calm myself down. Man, I'm so irritated right now. I’m trying not to take it out on Eren. I know exactly why I’m so irritated too but there’s nothing I can do to fix it. Eren’s anxiety is causing me to be more easily irritable and it doesn’t help that I’m tired and worn out which just makes it worse.

“Okay. Just please don’t push yourself.: He placed a kiss on my cheek and it made me feel better for the moment, but the irritation picked right back up the second everyone walked in. There are so many people in here, and all their thoughts keep drawing my attention.

I hate being this worn out. It's so much harder to control my powers and my focus will just keep shifting to different people's thoughts making it worse. It sucks, even more, when it gets to the point where I just lose control and all of their thoughts weigh on me all at once.

I forgot how shitty my powers are. I’ve been so used to having control of them, and it’s been so long since I’ve overused them to this extent that I forgot how painful it gets.

It didn’t help that everything felt so heavy. I could barely keep my head up not to mention how fucking heavy my costume is. I should have taken off the knives when we went to our room but my dumbass didn’t even think of that.

As everyone finished taking their seats I felt Eren’s anxiety pick up.

“Babe please calm down, everything’s going to be fine,” I whispered trying to be as nice as possible to him. I didn’t want to take my anger out on him. It wasn't his fault I overdid it earlier, or that I didn't get enough sleep. 

Sorry babe I’m trying. I heard him think. He took a deep breath and nothing happened. His thoughts remained as chaotic and stressful as before. No, I'm wrong they actually got worse. Now he kept worrying that he was bothering me too. All I did was make him and myself more miserable.

Great, this is going to be a really really long day. I looked at him and rolled my eyes. I could be sleeping in bed right now, but no, the things I do for love. I grabbed his hand under the table and I felt him give my hand a little squeeze.

“These are the new teams that Eren and Levi came up with,” Pixis said before reading off the teams.

They all seemed a little confused about some of their placements. Rico of course was the first one to jump up and say something. “Why the hell am I in team D. Not only am I not in the fighting group, but I’m the only one not with any of my usual comrades.”

“Team D is the other fighting group,” Eren started awkwardly. I felt his grip on my hand tighten as he nervously tried to explain to her why she was placed where she was. “We were going to put you in team A, but we realized that team D needed you more. They needed a stronger person on their team to help them,” he said. Wow, straight-up lying to her face. Now that’s ballsy.

She sat back for a second and rolled her eyes, “Fine, but I better not have to carry the whole team,” she sat back down.

Smart, he played to her personality. I thought Christa’s power was manipulation, but Eren seems to have mastered it.

“Why are Marlowe and I in team A? We aren’t fighters,” Hitch asked her voice was a lot quieter than Rico's.

“Well, we decided both of your powers would greatly help our group. Marlowe’s power will be able to tell us what trouble we are about to get into, and your power will help distract some guards if there are too many to fight,” Eren explained.

They both seemed okay with those answers. No one else really questioned their groupings, but more of what their roles were in the groups.

Eren explained to Nanaba and Thomas what he had planned for them and they seemed okay with it. Gunther and Hannes had asked about their positions and I could feel Eren freezing up.

Great, we didn’t really plan anything for them. I looked towards Pixis and he seemed to realize Eren couldn't come up with a lie on the spot this time.

“Well,” Pixis started with Hannes, “We had decided that there could be a microphone in the surveillance room since sometimes these places have intercoms. If there is an intercom we were thinking maybe you can mimic someone's voice and distract some of the guards. If there isn’t an intercom we are still going to need help defending the room and we figured that since some of us will be using hand to hand combat you will be able to mimic us, or use your own hand to hand combat skills.”

Hannes nodded and seemed okay with that. Pixis then turned to Gunther. “As for you, we figured your powers might be able to help get some information out of some of the camp's occupants whether it’s just to make sure that they are telling the truth about being well enough to walk, or if they know anything about the camp or the guards that can maybe help. We also thought you could interrogate the guards that are left conscious but incapacitated. See if they know about any other camps.”

“Sounds doable,” he nodded.

Wow, I’m impressed we didn’t even think of that. That’s actually really smart. He went from us not knowing what to do with him to an almost essential sounding position, Eren thought and I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes. Who knew a lie would be a great plan.

“Any more questions?” Pixis asked and Nanba nodded.

“Who are the other people we will be working with?”

“Good question,” Pixis smiled. “We don’t want to overwhelm you guys so we were going to introduce them one or two at a time so you can meet them without a bunch of chaos going on in the background,” Pixis said and she nodded.

We all headed out of the conference room and went straight to the common area. Shadis walked over to the rooms.

“Shadis is going to send one or two people over and when they return to their room he will send the next one or two,” Pixis explained.

“Why would he send two and not just one the whole time?” Rico rolled her eyes. Nanba elbowed her and she rubbed at her arm and glared at her.

“Well, he’s going by rooms. Some rooms have more than one person in them. We won't be bringing out Hanji, Erwin, or Auruo since you've already met them. Oh, also there will be two people here that you won’t be meeting.” Pixis said, remembering, “we have two civilian refugees staying here for the time being, but they don’t really leave their rooms very much.”

“That’s fine,” Nanaba said preemptively glaring at Rico and Gunther threatening them to keep their mouths shut.

“Each person will be telling you their name, codename, and powers,” Pixis said.

“I’ll have my team do the same,” Nanaba said with a nod.


	30. Tensions Rise

Mike started walking up and it was obvious they were going to introduce the more mature people first. “Looks like they started with the old people,” I mumbled and Eren elbowed me.

“That’s mean,” He said but he betrayed himself as he let a snicker slip past his lips.

Pixis just raised an eyebrow at both of us. Shit, he wasn’t supposed to hear me. “Yes we did start with the old people,” he mumbled to me, “is there something wrong with that.”

“Nope, not at all,” I said, trying not to laugh.

I looked at Mike as he stopped in front of everyone. It's been a while since he’s been in his costume. He was wearing black jeans with a drown jacket that had a black stripe going down the sleeves. His mask is normally plain black, but today he doesn’t seem to be wearing it. He also had black noise-canceling earmuffs. For his power noise canceling just made him hear at a normal level he usually only wears them when he starts getting overwhelmed. They were around his neck at the moment.

“I’m Mike, my codename is bloodhound, and my power is remote tracking and heightened senses.” They greeted him and introduced themselves before he headed back to his room.

The next person who came out was Eld. “Oh look another old person,” Pixis leaned over looking at me and Eren who were just trying to hold it together at this point. We get it you heard us talking shit but good lord I didn’t expect you to play along.

His costume was just a normal black jacket with a white strap on the sleeves. The only other thing on his jacket was a volume signal getting crossed out. His black mask had a red X over it. He walked up pulling off his mask. Rather than walking up to the others, he walked up to me.

He didn’t say anything, but his thoughts were loud and clear in my head. My voice is giving me trouble today. Could you relay the message?

I nodded before stepping away from the sidelines where I was standing and coming front and center with him.

“Everyone, this is Eld. His codename is the silencer, and his power is he can control what people say or silence them. He apologizes for not introducing himself, but his power backlash has permanently damaged his vocal cords and some days it’s hard for him to speak.” As I was speaking Eld was using sign language just signing that he was very sorry. He was afraid of coming off as rude.

To my surprise, Nanaba actually signed back to him. Telling him It’s okay and there was no need to be sorry.

I guess she saw the look of shock on our faces, because she quickly mumbled out, “I’m far from fluent, but I know enough to know what he was saying.”

They all introduced themselves and he headed back to his room, but not before thanking them for being so understanding.

Petra was the next person sent out. It was so weird seeing her in her costume since she hardly ever goes on missions. She was wearing a white lab coat with black jeans and a black shirt that had the periodic table on it. Lastly, her mask was actually a gas mask. Upon seeing everyone else with their masks off she pulled off the gas mask with a look of relief that she didn’t have to wear it anymore.

Her and Auruo’s costumes look the most like teachers. Her costume aside from the gas mask reminds me of a chemistry teacher. Auruo's reminds me of an English teacher since his jacket is the only thing designed and all it says is the word revolution in different languages. My favorite is the sign language version on his back. I was snapped back to reality when Petra started talking.

“Hello.” She gave everyone a friendly smile before introducing herself, "I’m Petra, My codename is The Chemist, and my power is manipulating the states of matter.” They all responded with their names, codenames, and powers back to her. She nodded before heading back to her room.

The next two people who came out were a bit of a shook for me. I didn’t expect them to come out together. Mom and Molbit came walking up and I was a little confused. They didn’t share a room so why are they coming out together?

My attention was pulled over to Nanaba’s thoughts as she mentally questioned why they weren’t in costume. They don’t have costumes, they don’t have powers so it’s not really necessary for them to have any.

“We wanted to introduce these two together,” Pixis said as they walked up. He threw his arms over both of their shoulders. “This is Ms. Magnolia, and this is Molbit,” he introduced them.

“Nice to meet you,” they both said with a big smile.

“Neither of them have powers so-,” he was instantly cut off.

“See I told you we can’t trust them!” Rico yelled backing up from them. “They’re traitors.”

I expected Nanaba to yell at her or something, but Nanaba even seemed a little weary of the situation. After a hesitant moment, she finally did speak up. “Maybe we should let them explain,” she mumbled to her team, her eyes never leaving Mom and Molbit.

“What more is there for them to explain, they are working with the enemy,” Gunther said standing with Rico.

“Now listen here,” Mom said walking up to them. Fuck, wait, no. I felt my feet move on their own as I walked towards mom to try and hold her back. I swear this woman has no fear she might get herself killed. “I don’t know how you can label us as “the enemy” or “traitors,” you don’t even know us. We’ve done more to help this team than you can even dream of. That being said, like hell will I let you disrespect me in front of my boys.” She said, walking over, throwing her arms around me and Eren pulling us close to her.

“They’re your sons?” Nanaba asked. She looked confused probably since Eren Mom and I looked nothing alike.

“Yup,” she said happily.

“Not by blood,” I corrected so they wouldn’t get confused. “It’s a long story, but yeah she’s basically my mom and she just kinda adopted well, everyone.” I sighed.

“Her codename is mom because everyone here already calls her that,” Pixis stated. “As for Molbit, he worked at the school with me before all of this went down. He is a close friend to a lot of us and he came with us to help in any way he could. His code name is The Spy since that’s what he is. He is our spy.”

“I work with a group of government engineers so I can look over what they are making and make sure it’s nothing that will hurt any exiles and when I can I work with volunteer groups that help bring the guards patrolling the city food and drinks, and man do those guys like to run their mouths about sensitive information.”

“Wouldn’t it be hard for you to get any information since you have a background of working at the powered school?” Nanaba asked she sounded very suspicious.

“It was at first, but then it actually kinda helped me in the end. Pixis gave me the idea to tell them how “horribly” I was treated. He came up with a story about how I was used as the test dummy and how they hurt me over and over again and how I’m so scared of them and whatever. When they asked why I didn’t leave I said I was afraid they would track me down. When they ask what changed I just stroke their ego and say I feel a lot braver now that there are guards around to protect everyone. Apparently, they believed me.”

“How do we know you aren’t lying?” Rico asked.

“Everyone here will vogue for them if you think that will help,” Pixis shrugged. “They both get us most of our supplies when I’m unable to go out. Molbit has brought us so much valuable information, and Ms. Magnolia takes care of everyone.” Pixis went on trying to list reasons to Rico and Gunther little did he know they had already made up their minds and were refusing to budge.

The only one he could convince is Nanaba who was still on the fence. The rest of them seemed to be waiting for her say. They were pretty indifferent about everything.

I’m so over it right now. My head is pounding, the yelling didn’t help, and now Pixis is lecturing on and on to people who aren’t even listening, and on top of all that they are talking shit about the people I care about in their thoughts. Fuck this, Pixis had his chance it’s my turn either they are going to listen to me or I’m going to knock some teeth out.

“Whatever you are about to do, I wouldn’t,” I heard mom whisper to me. She could probably feel the anger radiating off of me.

“Too late,” I mumbled back to her.

“Give it a rest,” I cut Pixis off from his rambling. “You’re trying to convince the wrong people,” I rolled my eyes. “They’ve already decided not to believe a word you say no matter what. They are just as bad as the government.”

“What the fuck did you say?” Rico said walking up to me. Alright looks like we’re squaring up. For once today I’m glad I kept all my knives.

Mom nearly pushed me behind her as she walked up but I put a hand on her shoulder and gave her a little nod letting her know I got this. I took a few steps forward to meet Rico halfway. More so to keep Eren and Mom safely behind me.

“You heard what I said, you two are as bad as the government, how is what you are doing any different from them? Judging someone just because they have powers or in this case, don’t have powers. Because they don’t have a power they are automatically dangerous, referring to them as “the enemy”, not listening to reason when people try to tell you that they aren’t bad. Hmm, that sounds awfully familiar, I wonder where I’ve heard it before.” I said sarcastically before getting in her face. “What next? Are you going to say they are cursed, that because they were born without powers they are evil and shouldn’t have been born, or how about maybe suggest we throw them out because you don’t feel safe?”

She glared into me with her mouth open like she wanted to say something. I didn’t even give her the chance. “That's what I thought, now close your damn mouth before more bullshit falls out of it.”

“Alright you two,” Mom said, getting between us. “Mean words and name-calling won’t solve anything.

“Actually I think that solved everything,” Nanaba said laughing before walking up to me. “You’re right, we were being completely judgemental and rude. I’m sorry for how we acted and we will fix the attitudes and judgemental thoughts.” She said addressing everyone before turning to me.

“I’ve never met anyone who can leave Rico that speechless so that was quite the treat,” she said patting me on the shoulder before reaching a hand out towards mom.

“We got off on the wrong foot, and I would like to fix that,” she said and mom nodded and shook her hand.

She and everyone else introduced themselves, well everyone aside from Rico. Gunther even introduced himself which surprised me. He did it quietly and hesitantly but he still did it. Rico was still standing there quietly staring at the ground. Her thoughts were crowded and chaotic. She was running over my words over and over again. Nanaba ended up just introducing her, and rather than the usual glare she stayed staring at the ground.

“Well it was lovely meeting you all,” Mom said before walking back over towards us and giving us a kiss on the foreheads.

She leaned in and whispered in my ear, “I’m proud of you hun, but you don’t look well. Promise me after this you’ll take it easy.” She spoke loud enough for Eren to hear, probably making sure that he knows to watch out for me.

I nodded and she and Molbit went back to their respective rooms.

“Well, that one was a little heated, but I’m sure the next few will go smoothly,” Pixis said with an awkward smile.

Fuck we still have more people. This is taking forever. Eren scooted closer to me so we were standing almost shoulder to shoulder. That was reckless. He thought to me. Hypocrite. But I think you got through to her.

Hopefully, because if she keeps this up I will end up fighting her. I’m tired and done with this shit and we are less than halfway done.


	31. Final Introductions

I couldn’t stop fidgeting as every second got more and more uncomfortable. Franz was the next one to come out. Looks like he’s going down that row of rooms first unless he’s going across? If Hanna’s next he’s going down the row if Ymir and Christa are next he’s going across.

Franz’s costume was a chaotic mess. Most costumes are designed to help minimize backlash if possible, however, Franz’s backlash is just the backlash of whoever’s power he’s using at the moment. He was wearing a black winter coat for Marco’s backlash, wrist wraps for Eren and Pixis’s backlash, fireproof gloves for Jean’s backlash and I think he carries around a bottle of painkillers for other people’s backlash. The rest of his costume was just regular black jeans and a red face mask.

He walked up and I could feel how awkward he was. God, I wish my powers would stop jumping around and would just stay focused on Eren. I would rather just suffer through Eren’s anxiety for the whole time than be jumping through a million different emotions. It’s giving me whiplash.

“Um, hi,” He said, giving a little awkward wave before pulling down his mask so that it was just under his chin. “I’m Franz, my codename is Replicate or Eradicate, and um well, my power is that I can replicate people's powers or erase them for a few minutes.”

They greeted him and introduced themselves, well, everyone except Rico who was just standing there quietly staring at the floor. She didn’t even look angry anymore, just blank. I tried to listen to her thoughts and all I heard were my own words from earlier repeating on loop. Maybe I got through to her? Or maybe she’s pissed off and plotting her revenge? Don’t know, don't care I’m just glad she’s not thinking shit about my friends.

The next person who came out was Hanna. Yup, they are going down the rows, makes sense. They are sending all the rooms with one person before sending the rooms with two people. Which if I’m correct Jean and Marco should be the last people they send. That will be a hell of a finale especially if Gunther or Rico talk shit to them. Knowing Jean he wouldn’t hesitate to pick a fight, then again I’m right there with him this time.

I looked back up at Hanna and noticed she had changed her mask. It was no longer a plain black one, but now it was a bright yellow. The rest of her costume was just a plain black jacket with her codename on the back and black jeans.

“I’m Hanna, nice to meet you all,” she said with a smile, “My code name is overload, and my power is that I can overload someone’s mind causing them some pain, memory loss, or loss of consciousness.”

Some pain, now that’s the understatement of the year. I felt like my head was splitting open, and first off that wasn’t even her full ability, secondly, I have a higher tolerance to that sort of pain and it still brought me to my knees.

The next person to come out was Mina and I could tell she was super nervous to be around everyone. Her costume was just like Hanna’s. It wasn’t customized aside from her codename on the back. The only difference aside from that is that her mask is white.

“I’m Mina,” she whispered, “my codename is Poltergeist, and I can possess people for a short period of time.”

“Oh, you are the one who is supposed to kick off the mission,” Nanaba said intrigued.

“Yeah, it seems so,” she mumbled.

They greeted her and when she left I heard Nanaba’s thoughts. They’re putting an awful lot on that poor girl's plate. I hope she’s not too stressed out about her role in all of this.

The more I listen, the more Nanaba seems like a nice person. My only question is how did such a nice lady end up in the same team as Rico and Gunther.

Armin was the next one to come out. Which no one could even see him. He was so nervous that he came out completely invisible. The only reason I knew he was there was because I snapped over to his thoughts on accident.

His thoughts kept panicking. Why did I come out here like this? If I just appear in front of them would that scare them? Would they feel threatened? Would it just be weird? God his rambling was hurting my head. I just closed my eyes and rubbed at my temple. Finally, I heard him actually think to me. Levi do you know I’m here. I kept my eyes closed but gave him a nod.

Should I just appear? Would that freak them out? Maybe I should walk back towards the rooms and try to walk back out? Or maybe-.

I’m not listening to another second of this shit. “Armin for fuck’s sake stop with the spiraling thoughts my head is killing me.” I blurted out. PIxis just looked around for him before looking at me a little confused.

“Armin’s here?”

“Yeah, he’s nervous and invisible, not to mention splitting my head open with his thoughts.”

A second later Armin awkwardly appeared in front of us with his head down and eyes glued to the floor. Shit, I probably just embarrassed him even more. Ya know what oh well I’m too annoyed to deal with this today.

“Um, hi,” he mumbled. It was so hard to hear him. God, I feel bad for embarrassing him. I let out a sigh and walked up next to him. “This is Armin, he’s a bit shy. His code name is Ghost and his powers are invisibility and phasing,” I said introducing him so he wouldn’t have too. He looked up at me and gave me a grateful smile. They all introduced themselves before he scurried off back to his room.

The next group was Ymir and Christa. Makes sense, we ran out of rooms that only had one person in each so I guess we’re on the double rooms. Ymir walked straight up and Christa trailed awkwardly behind her. Christa’s costume was one of the most decked out ones here, and that’s mostly thanks to Ymir since she designed it for her. We could tell she still wasn’t fully confident in it.

She wore a black shirt that had a blueish greenish purplish glimmered seashells over her chest. Her pants and the same blue green purple color with a scaly design. They were skin-tight except around her calves where they started to loosely flow out. Almost like a mermaid tail. Her shoes were high heel combat boots. Her mask not only covered her face but her neck too and there were gills around her next designed on the mask.

Lastly, her gloves which were my personal favorite part of this costume. They had a button on them that when pressed fins would pop out. Well, they were shaped like fins, but in reality, they were razor-sharp knives. That could sheath and unsheath themselves at the press of that button. I’m still not exactly sure how Ymir made them, but she did an amazing job.

“Sup,” Ymir said, giving them a little nod. “I’m Ymir and this is my girlfriend Christa.” Well, guess we’re going to find out if they are homophobic or not. It was bound to happen, but damn Ymir really gives no fucks.

Surprisingly no one seemed to have any issues with that. Good to know we aren’t dealing with any homophobes. Lucky them because I’m at the point where I would, without hesitation, stab someone.

“My codename is Ouija, and I can talk to ghosts,” Ymir continued.

“Ghosts aren’t real? Are they?” I heard Hannes ask before looking around.

“Oh they are very real, I see at least three in this room right now,” she said with a smile.

I could already tell who was here by the sudden weight on my shoulders. Someone was leaning on me, and someone else was holding my hand. I could tell I wasn’t the only one when Eren whispered. “Mom?” He brought his hand up to his cheek and let out a smile.

“Guess I don’t need to tell you two who decided to stop by,” Ymir said looking over at us.

“Mom,’s here,” Eren said back to her and she nodded.

“Farlan and Isabell are on me. Let me guess Farlan’s the one leaning on me and Isabell is the one holding my hand?” I asked.

“Yup,” she said happily, “you guys are getting better at telling who is where,” she smiled.

Hannes looked around the room a little anxiously and I noticed he wasn’t the only one. For the first time since Mom and Molbit left Rico actually spoke up.

“There aren’t any around me are there?” She asked, her voice was quiet, but her thoughts were chaotic. I swear to god if any of those sick fucks are haunting me, watching my every move I’ll find a way to kill them again.

Did I hear her right? She’s killed people before… You know what I’m not even surprised at this point.

“I don’t see any around any of you at the moment,” Ymir shrugged.

Rico just nodded but she still kept looking around the room with a new anxious feeling.

“Anyway, Christa you’re up,” She said, putting her arm around her shoulder and bringing her more towards the front.

“Um, okay,” she mumbled before looking at the other exiles, “my codename’s Seiren, and my power is thought manipulation, and enhanced charisma.”

They headed back to their room and out came the next group.

Mikasa and Annie were the next two out...this is going to be interesting. Annie isn’t what you call a people person, hell, I was worried about Jean picking a fight, but let’s be honest Annie would pick a fight and win it in a heartbeat.

Mikasa’s costume makes me laugh every time. Her costume has all these fake shields everywhere. On her arms, legs, and back. They are made out of cheap sheet metal and are stitched to her jacket and pants. The only reason they are there is because Pixis was afraid of people finding out that Mikasa was indestructible, so he came up with the shield design to throw people off and make it look like the shields were blocking her or something.

Annie on the other hand looked badass. She wore a long-sleeved white shirt and black jeans. There were holes in her shirt and pants where her chrystals poked through looking like rows of long crystal spikes sticking out of her arms and legs. Her helmet was made out of her crystals with nothing but clear crystals for where she needed to see. Mikasa nudged her as they walked up and the crystal helmet faded back into her skin.

Mikasa and Annie walked up hand in hand and Mikasa introduced the both of them. “I’m Mikasa and this is Annie. My codename is The Ultimate Shield, and her’s is Gemstone. Her power as you can see is the crystals. She can crystalize her skin, shoot crystals at people, and make a crystal barrier. Oh, these crystals are also bulletproof.” Mikasa explained. “My powers are indestructibility, super strength, and super stamina.”

The looks on everyone's faces were priceless. Most of them looked a little anxious when shaking their hands and introducing themselves. Especially around Annie. She looked scary, I mean she has a resting bitch face and sharp crystal daggers growing out of her skin.

They went back to their rooms and I could see a few people calm down a little bit. I saw Sasha and Connie turn the corner and I was just hoping they don’t ask a million questions.

Sasha’s costume was always cool to see. Her costume was half white half black. Her jacket was black on the left and white on the right while her pants were black on the right and white on the left. Even her combat boots were black and white. When she used to walk around with a double they always had the exact opposite costume as her so it would be a little easier for people to tell. Connie on the other hand just had a plain black jacket and plain black pants.

“Oh my god, we finally get to meet you all!” Sasha squealed excitedly.

Dear god if she gives me a headache I’ll send them both back to their room and just tell them their information.

“Yeah, this is awesome!” Connie said equally as excited.

“I’m Sasha and I hope we can all be great friends!”

“I’m Connie, and yea what she said!”

Oh my god hurry up.

“My codename is doubles,” Sasha said before another one of her appeared next to her. “I can make duplicates of myself,” She said throwing her arm around her double.

“My codename is The Blur,” Connie said before appearing at the other end of the room and yelling across it, “I have super speed.”

He came back over and the other exiles introduced themselves and just like I thought Sasha started bombarding them with questions.

They all looked caught off guard and I just stepped in “Sasha, don’t pester them.” I said before picking her up with my power and handing her over to Connie. I looked at him and told him, “take her back to your room we have other people who still need to introduce themselves.”

Connie nodded and whispered to Sasha. “Don’t fuck with Levi he’s in one of his moods today.” Before disappearing as he ran off to their room. What the fuck is that supposed to mean? You know what at this moment I could care less.

When I saw who walked out next I just let out a sigh. Berthold is fine, but Reiner better behave himself. Reiner’s costume has definitely changed a little since the last time I saw him in it. He was wearing a padded motorcycle jacket with a motorcycle helmet for a mask. Those are new.

“Hello,” Berthold said, walking up. I was so relieved reading his thoughts. He and Reiner had apparently made a deal to let Berthold do all the talking. “I’m Berthold and this is Reiner. My code name is Resilient Recoil, and his is Armored Boost. My power is that I can stretch myself until I’m paper-thin. His power is enhanced strength and enhanced speed.”

I could tell Berthold rushed through the explanation, probably since it was obvious Reiner really didn’t want to be there and he looked annoyed that they even had to introduce themselves.

When they left and I saw Jean and Marco turn the corner I felt so relieved. The last group we are almost done. Finally.

Jean and Marco walked up and Maro introduced them. “I’m Marco and this is Jean. My codename is Cryo,”

“And mine is Pyro,” Jean said with a smile.

“Oh they kinda match,” Hitch said with a little giggle, “is that on purpose?”

“Yup,” Jean nodded happily. “I can make fire, steam, and electricity,”

“I can make ice, control water, and breath underwater,” Marco said.

When they finished the introductions Pixis dismissed everyone. He told them they could go back to their rooms, train in the sparing area, or hang out in the common area if they wanted. He was already giving them free rein it seemed. He did give them a warning that he was letting everyone out of their rooms and some of them are a little chaotic. He specifically named Sasha which doesn’t surprise me.

When everyone started heading their separate ways the only thing stopping me from running back to my room was that my legs refused to move that fast.

“Do you want me to carry you?” Eren asked. I had to stop myself from telling him to fuck off because he genuinely was worried about me and didn’t mean to patronize me, but man it sure felt like it.

“No, I can walk.”

“Man you look like shit,” Jean said walking up next to us as we started heading to our room.

I could see Eren out of the corner of my eyes trying to motion for him to cut it out that today was not the day,

“I feel like shit,” I mumbled.

“Overdid it?” He asked with a more serious and worried tone after noticing Eren’s behavior.

“Something like that.”

I felt his hand pat me on the back. “Alright, get some rest dude I’ll bug you later then,” he said before walking away.

“Well, at least he’s respectful about when to bug me,” I mumbled.

“He’s a jackass, but he knows when not to fuck with people,” Eren laughed, "especially when said person has so many knives on him and will not hesitate to kill him."

"You have a point," I shrugged.

“I’m just surprised you squared up with that Rico girl, I’m almost positive she’s probably killed someone before.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Just a feeling.”

“That sounds like you’re being judgemental,” I rolled my eyes.

“Not judgemental. She just has that vibe,” he mumbled, “I bet you-,” he froze not sure what to bet. “If I win I top next if you win you top,” he shrugged.

“I'll take that bet,” I laughed. I mean either way we get to have sex it’s a win-win.

When we got back to the room I just collapsed on the bed and felt a wave of relief wash over me.

“Hun I know you’re tired but can you sit up for a second?” Eren asked and I just let out a groan.

“Why?” I asked but did it anyway.

He sat on the bed in front of me and told me I could lean my head on his shoulder and I did just that. I felt as some of the weight started to come off of me. He was taking off all my knives. He managed to slip my jacket off and then whispered, “lift ur head and arms up,” I did just that and he slipped my shirt off.

“Sorry babe but you’re going to have to do the pants yourself,” he said and I sighed.

I stood up and watched as he threw his sweats back on too. He left his shirt off and laid down waiting for me. I was moving so slowly, but I couldn't physically push myself to go any faster. The second I got my sweats on I plopped down on the bed and crawled up next to him. He wrapped an arm around me and I was about to close my eyes when there was a knock.

Who the fuck is that? I swear to god I’m going to murder someone today.


	32. Surprise Guest

Eren sat up and I felt as he ran a finger through my hair. “It’s probably just Sasha checking in on you,” Eren whispered. “I’ll have her leave quickly. Come in!” He said

“Sasha wouldn’t have knocked,” I mumbled. I didn’t even care who just walked in I just kept my face buried in Eren’s chest.

“Oh,” I heard someone say, and instantly I sat up and whipped my head around to the doorway. “I didn’t mean to bother you,” she said.

Of all the people I expected to be at our door, Rico wasn’t one of them, yet here she stood in our doorway. “Um,” was all I managed to say. I was going to tell whoever it was to fuck off, but I already almost fought her earlier, and she seemed to be a lot calmer now so maybe it’s best to hear her out before fighting.

“I thought I should come in here and talk to you,” she said looking at me. Her voice was a lot quieter than earlier.

“Okay,” I just hesitantly sat up and waited for her to continue.

“Well, I wanted to say you were right, I had my head up my ass earlier. You made me realize that I was wrong and I owe you and those other two an apology. I was on edge and I let my emotions get the better of me and threw my rational thought out the window. I’m sorry, I’ll try to keep a more open mind rather than jumping to conclusions.” Her voice faded out as I watched her eyes drift down from my own to my chest. I looked down and realized she was staring at my scar.

“Apology accepted,” I had to give her credit. Not everyone owns up to their mistakes like she did however, she’s starting to piss me off for a different reason. “It’s rude to stare, you know?” I said rolling my eyes. I’m just glad for once I wasn’t my power didn’t snap over to her thoughts instead they stayed focused on Eren’s. I didn't need to hear the pitiful or judgmental thoughts.

“Huh,” she said, snapping out of her thoughts. “Sorry, I’ve just never seen someone who had scars similar to mine.”

Wait what. That’s not what I was expecting. “Similar to yours?” I just heard myself repeat since my brain couldn’t process fully what she had said until I repeated them.

She turned around and lifted her shirt showing some long gashes and burn marks on her back. The gashes on her back looked more organized than the ones on my chest. It didn’t seem like they were there by accident, and those burn marks were obviously from cigarettes. She let her shirt fall back down and turned around. “I didn’t mean to be rude, I was genuinely surprised,” she shrugged.

“They do look similar,” I mumbled. I didn’t want to blurt out that mine were from a car accident since hers obviously were from some form of abuse.

“I assume they are from your power trigger,” she asked quietly almost like she was debating about asking it. I just gave her a quiet nod and she closed her eyes and nodded back. “Mine too.”

I felt my power snap to her thoughts as much as I tried to force it back to Eren’s it was stuck on hers. I was watching the thoughts rush through her head as her memories flashed by. I could tell that talking about her scar triggered something because her thoughts went by so fast,/ Traumatic memories came rushing through yet I could understand all of them and the emotions that came with them.

I saw her with her parents at a young age and the next thing I saw was them holding money as she walked away with a random stranger feeling scared. The next few memories I saw were horrible, but from the next memory came in and with it, her venom bite and nails made their first appearance. She found out almost instantly when she killed their “client,” after she bit him. When they found out she killed him she knew she was in danger when she overheard them talking about how they were going to “Get rid of” her. When they came to grab her. She decided it was now or never. She scratched the person who came to get her and they laid there dying on the floor as she freed the other children trapped there with her. With all the stress rushing through her, her second power triggered. She ended up freeing everyone and killing all of their captors with her poison gas.

She was living on the street for over a month when Nanaba found her. Nanaba took her home and gave her a place to stay. Hannes was apparently Nanaba’s roommate. Well, that explains how those three know each other. Rico was only thirteen when all of that happened. My god, that’s horrible.

Rico blinked and snapped out of her thoughts remembering that I could read minds. She looked up and was wondering if I happened to see any of that. I just gave her a little nod. I heard her next thought loud and clear. Shit sorry, you weren’t supposed to see any of that shit. I’d stay out of my mind, it's a mess in here. “I should be heading back to my room,” she mumbled before turning to leave without another word.

“Well that was weird,” Eren mumbled. Our minute of silence and then her awkward expression probably confused him.

“Traumatic flashback,” I mumbled.

“Oh that makes more sense,” he mumbled. “Is she okay?”

“I think so,” I shrugged, “she just apologized when she realized I could hear her thoughts, oh and one more thing,” I sighed. “You won the bet.”

“I knew it!” Eren said happily before realizing what that meant. “Wait a minute,” his next thought was clear. Did whoever she killed deserve to die?

“Yes, 100 percent without a doubt, they all did,” I mumbled.

“All? How many?” He asked a little more worried.

“A lot, but they were all-,” I paused for a minute not wanting to air her dirty laundry, “horrible horrible people,” I said changing my original words, but said them with just as much hate that I might as well have said them anyway. With how much hate just radiated off of me Eren instantly knew what I was talking about.

“Oh, well good I’m glad they got what was coming to them, filthy bastards,” he mumbled before wrapping an arm around me.

I thought back to how Nanaba and Hannes took her in and some things started to make a lot more sense. Nanaba being the only one who can get her to quiet down, or how she would look to Nanaba every time something bad happened She sees Nanaba as a parental figure. It also explains why when Pixis told their group that two of them would have to share a room in order to be in the same area of the building, Hannes and Nanaba volunteered. They were already roommates at one point this was the same thing, but this time they didn’t have a wall between them.

“I don’t know what’s got you so deep in thought, but you need to cut it out and get your ass to bed,” Eren said pulling me back so I was laying down rather than sitting up. “If I have to deal with your grumpy ass for any longer you’re going to be napping alone,” he threatened.

“You can’t do that,” I pouted, “I need a pillow,” I teased.

“Alright smartass,” he rolled his eyes before getting up.

“No wait I’m sorry,” I said and he looked back at me and then shook his head at me.

“Are you going to beg me to stay?” He asked with a devious smile.

“I don’t need a pillow that bad,” I said turning around.

“What!” he folded his arms.

“Fine, only because you want me too, but not because I need you or anything,” I mumbled before turning around and looking him in the eyes. “Please stay for me,” I pouted.

“Okay, but only because you begged,” he said happily before laying back down next to me and pulling me close to him.

“Whatever,” I mumbled before closing my eyes.

I felt his fingers run through my hair, “I love you baby sleep well,” he whispered just before the world faded away.


	33. Rico

“Well that was weird,” I heard that Eren guy say right as I leaned up against the wall to catch my breath.

“Traumatic flashback,” Levi said right after. I rolled my eyes, well why don’t you just tell the whole world. Whatever, I don’t even care that much. Tell everyone I don’t give a shit.

I took a deep breath. I didn’t want to stay here any longer than needed. Not to mention eavesdropping is the last thing I want to do. It's so pathetic. I tried to move away from the wall and found my legs frozen in place. There’s no use, I can’t move. I can barely keep my breathing in check, but my muscles all tensed up and refused to release.

Just breath Rico you’re fine stop being a little bitch I told myself over and over again until I believe it. Or that was the plan at least.

“Oh that makes more sense,” I heard Eren say. “Is she okay?”

I’m doing fucking fabulous not that he should care.

“I think so, she just apologized when she realized I could hear her thoughts.” I felt my legs relax a little and I managed to move away from their room. Finally, all I have to do is apologize to the other two and I can spend the rest of this miserable day inside the room away from everyone.

I walked down the long hallway hoping I was heading the right way. Pixis had told me where I could find each of the rooms, but the long row of rooms seemed to blend together as I walked down them. Was this one Molbit’s or was it the next one? Did I already pass it?

They said third from the end on the left side is Molbit’s and on the right side was Ms. Magnolia. Is this the third room? I can’t tell my head is pounding my heart is racing and I’m still having trouble catching my breath. I’m so dizzy and the room is spinning. I closed my eyes for a quick second to try and get my head straight. Knock it off Rico you’re fine I told myself.

“You okay? You don’t look too good hun,” I heard a voice behind me right as I tried to turn around I passed out. Guess I was too stubborn to realize I was hyperventilating so much that I wasn’t getting enough oxygen.

I shot up and opened my eyes. “Where am I,” the words left my mouth before I could look around the room. I was in a room, in a bed. This wasn’t my room and wasn’t my bed.

“You passed out just outside my door,” I heard the same voice that came through right before I lost consciousness.

“Ms. Magnolia?” I asked rubbing at my eyes that were still trying to focus in the dark room. “What time is it?” I asked. I thought it was around noon. Why is it so dark. I looked around and realized the lantern in the room was turned at the lowest setting and there were no windows. That’s right there’s not a lot of natural light around the rooms.

“It’s only been a few minutes since you blacked out,” she said, taking a seat on the other bed in the room. “I carried you in here so you wouldn’t wake up on the floor.

“Oh, thanks,” I mumbled.

“How’s your head?” She asked. She started to lean forward and reached a hand out to me before hesitantly pulling it back and putting it back down at her side. “You fell to the floor so fast you scared me half to death.”

“I’m okay.” Definitely not. My head was pounding before I passed out, but this is so much worse. I stood up and cleared my throat. “Um, I actually came here to apologize to you and Molbit about how I was acting earlier. I was being an ass.”

“Apology accepted,” she smiled. That was easy. Too easy. Who forgives people that quickly? And why does she have two beds in her room? Ya know what I don't care right now I just want to get this over with so I can head back to my own room.

“Oh okay then,” I said before looking to the door, “I’m going to go find Molbit now,” I said awkwardly pointing towards the door.”

“Okay, he should be in his room, he doesn’t leave it all that often.”

“He doesn’t?” That’s odd.

“Yeah, working as a spy has really gotten to him. He has really bad paranoia and is always looking over his shoulder whenever he’s in the room with other people.”

Sounds sketchy, but I’m trying to have a more open mind, so I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt I guess.

“Makes sense,” I mumbled, “thanks again,” I said before heading out of her room.

I looked at the door just across the hall from hers. This should be his then? I knocked on the wall next to Molbit’s door. I heard a quiet come in and did just that.

“Oh, um can I help you?” He asked tensing up when he realized it was me who walked in.

“I came to apologize for earlier. I’m sorry for how I was acting.”

“Oh,” he said a little shocked, “It’s okay, honestly, I understand where you were coming from,” he nodded.

“What?” That’s not at all what I expected him to say.

“I mean, you guys weren’t the only ones on edge today. I’m not the most level headed meeting new people either. My thoughts always jump to the worst-case scenario. Especially when I’m in a situation where I can’t predict the outcome.”

“Well I guess I made your worst-case scenario come true,” I mumbled.

“Oh, not even close,” he laughed, “ What happened today was a walk in the park compared, and honestly I’m okay with that,” a smile slipped onto his face.

“What was the worst-case scenario?” I asked out of pure curiosity. If today’s trainwreck wasn’t even close than how dark did his thoughts go.

“Well in any worst-case scenario my mind comes up with,” he let out a sigh before continuing, “people die,” he forced the words out. "Not that I thought any of you guys would actually purposely harm any of us, it's just that's how my mind works," he rushed the last part out.

Oh. I mean I should have known, but a part of me forgot that death was even a possibility. Our team has never come close to losing a member, and with our powers combined it seemed impossible so my thoughts never really go that dark.

“So far I’ve been lucky that all of my worst-case scenarios haven’t come true, but one of these days I might not be so lucky. We’ve come close to losing a few people once or twice, but so far, thankfully, everyone’s made it out alive.”

I thought our team of seven was invincible together. That we had enough people to fight any threat that came our way but hearing him say that his group has almost lost a few people scares me more than anything. Their group has almost 4 times as many people as ours, and yet here he is telling me that they aren’t strong enough to beat any threat. They have people who are literally bulletproof and indestructible. I felt my blood run cold for a moment. All the blood drained out of my face and I sat there with a thousand-yard stare as different scenarios flashed in front of my eyes.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to go that dark with this,” he must have noticed how pale I got.

“I-,” I couldn’t form any words. My thoughts just started spiraling.

“Are you okay? You’re not going to pass out again are you?” He asked and I looked up. He knew I passed out? Well I mean it was right in front of both his and Ms. Magnolia’s rooms.

“I’m okay,” I mumbled out. I could tell he didn’t believe me. I wouldn’t believe me either. My thoughts were still spiraling and all I could think about was Nanaba lying there dead on the floor in front of me. I can’t breathe. He just placed his hand on my back and led me over to his bed. I felt a different wave of panic wash over me, but I couldn’t snap myself out of this trance I was in.

He sat me down and just rubbed my back telling me, “it’s going to be okay,” and, “take a deep breath.”

I did just that and closed my eyes trying to clear my thoughts. Today is not my day. I don’t know why I’m so panicky today. Scratch that I know exactly why I’m so panicky. I was thrusted into a new environment surrounded and outnumbered by new people who I don’t even know if I can trust. On top of that, I keep getting these traumatic flashbacks and now spiraling thoughts about losing the people I care about, and now I'm sitting in some strange man's room on his bed having a mental breakdown.

I took a few deep breaths and just shut down all of my emotions. I went blank. These were going to be a bitch to deal with later, but I could care less. The last thing I want to do is break down in front of a total stranger. I shot up to my feet and opened my eyes.

“Thank you for calming me down, I’m sorry you had to see that,” I said with a monotone voice.

“It’s okay, if you need to talk, my doors always open,” he said with a soft tone. I could see the concern behind his eyes, but he stayed quiet.

“Thank you,” I mumbled before turning to leave. I just wanted to go back to my room and deal with all these emotions by myself. I’m surprised at how nice he acted. He genuinely seemed to care, but being in his room alone with him sent chills down my spine. Not because I have anything against him, but being in the room with a strange man alone has never ended well for me.

I avoided everyone in the common area as I headed over to our rooms. I finally made it back to my room and Nanaba was sitting on my bed with her legs crossed waiting for me. Fuck not now.

“You wanna talk about earlier?” She asked.

“Not really,” I said plopping down on the bed next to her burying my face in a pillow. “I already apologized so you don’t have to lecture me about it.”

“You apologized?” she sounded genuinely surprised, “I’m proud of you.”

“Don't get used to it,” I mumbled.

“Anything else on your mind that you want to talk about?” she asked, putting a hand on my back.

“Not really.”

“I know when something’s eating at you, and well, Ms. Magnolia told me that you blacked out not long ago.”

“Snitch.”

“Hey be nice. She was just worried about you, and so am I. You haven’t blacked out like that in years.”

I let out a loud groan knowing that she wasn’t going to let this go until I talked to her. “Fine,” I sat up, “yes I passed out. It wasn’t anything serious. It’s just that everything was weight down on me from today I was really stressed out and then with the traumatic flashba-.” shit.

“You had a traumatic flashback?” She asked getting even more worried.

I let out a sigh, “yes, but I’m fine now,” my voice cracked as I said that. Well, she can tell I’m lying now. I might not want to talk about any of this, but my brain keeps snapping back to that image of her dead on the floor and I want nothing more than to hug her.

“Honey,” she said, putting a hand on my shoulder. There it is. Whenever she knows I’m not doing okay she always calls me honey and puts her hand on my shoulder. She hasn’t done it since I was a kid. I never thought at 21 one word could break me, but that did it. I didn’t even hold back anymore. I just threw my arms around her and let myself break down.

“I know honey,” she whispered, pulling me into her lap. Her hand ran through my hair as she held me close. “It will be okay, I’m right here.”


	34. The Bias Vote

I sat up in bed with a headache, it wasn’t as bad as earlier, but it was still really annoying.

“Feeling better baby?” Eren asked as his arms wrapped around my waist.

“A little,” I waited for my eyes to adjust before realizing that my stomach was hurting. “I’m really hungry though.”

“Well, you slept all day without eating of course you’re hungry,” Eren threw his legs over the side of the bed and reached his hand out for me to take.

“All day? What time is it? It couldn’t have been that long, it was just noon.”

“It’s like 7 hun.”

“Seven? Why didn’t you wake me up?” I jumped up and threw a shirt nearly tripping over my own feet.

“You looked like you really needed the sleep, and it’s not like we have anything to do tonight or tomorrow morning.”

“Still, I don’t like sleeping the day away, do you know how hard it will be for me to fall asleep tonight?” I rolled my eyes.

“Oh you don’t have to worry about that,” Eren said coming up behind me putting his hands on my hips and whispering in my ear, “I’ll keep you up all night long.”

Oh yeah, that’s right he won the bet. “Cocky little shit,” I mumbled before shaking him off me. “Sex later food now.” I started walking out of the room and he laced our fingers together happily as we headed to the dining area. I hope there’s some food left.

“Mom set some aside for us don’t worry,” Eren said and I had to question who the real mind reader was for a moment. Eren if you can hear this you're a dumbass. I looked at him out of the corner of my eye. Nope, he still has that goofy smile on his face. Guess it was just a lucky guess. I smiled to myself before placing a kiss on his cheek.

“What was that for?” He asked a little surprised but with a smile on his face.

“I love you, even if you make me question myself sometimes,” I said laughing to myself.

“What is that supposed to me?”

“It means sometimes I have to try and figure out who the real mind reader is.”

Eren just smiled, “Hey I can’t help it. I know you so well that sometimes I just know what you're thinking.”

“I guess you do,” I said just as we made it into the dining room. There were still a few people who were finishing up their dinner. I glanced around until I spotted mom. She waved us over and we started walking up to her.

“How are you feeling?” She asked, giving me a smile.

“Better now.”

“Good, good, I saved you both some food,” she said handing us a bag with some takeout food.

“Smells, good,” I blurted out.

“Molbit and I picked up the food earlier so sorry if it’s a little cold. I just got you what you would normally get, I hope that’s okay.”

“It’s perfect,” I said, giving her a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks, mom.” We headed over to one of the empty tables and plopped down to eat. Well, it was empty until Jean saw that we were here and instantly nudged Marco. They picked up their plates and plopped down on the other side of the table.

“Oh my god, you look horrible!” Jean said when he sat down. I just rolled my eyes waiting for him to finish. “Oh nevermind that’s just your normal face.”

“That was so funny I forgot to laugh,” I said in my most deadpanned voice.

“What he means to say is how are you doing?” Marco said elbowing Jean a little.

“Better now, I still have a bit of a headache. Oh, wait no that’s just because Jean’s here,” I said glaring at him.

“So original I’ve never heard that one before,” Jean rolled his eyes.

“Mind if I interrupt?”

“Yes,” I said in an annoyed tone, before realizing who I was talking to. I turned around and saw Pixis and Shadis standing behind me and Eren. Oh fuck. “I mean-.”

“Sorry, I guess I should let you wake up a little more and finish eating,” Pixis said, a little surprised. He looked like he was about to laugh but was holding it. Probably from seeing my mortified face after realizing I just told Pixis to basically fuck off. “Would you two mind meeting me in my office when you’re done,” he said to me and Eren. I couldn’t find the words to speak so I just gave him an awkward nod. He smiled and headed back to his office.

“Damn Levi tell him how you really feel,” Jean said whispered with wide eyes.

“Oh god, I told Pixis to fuck off.” I stared down at the table mortified.

“Well, you didn’t use those exact words, but yeah pretty much,” Marco said trying to make me feel better. It didn’t work.

“Damn babe can you look at who you're talking to before letting your sass run free,” Eren rolled his eyes.

“I blame Jean.”

“Why, what the fuck did I do?”

“Well first off if me and you weren’t bickering with each other I wouldn’t have been in a snappy mood, and secondly because you’re you. Everything’s your fault somehow,” I shrugged.

“Ouch,” Jean said, holding his chest looking at me very offended. “Fuck you too.”

I just ignored him. I hurried and ate the rest of my food since Eren was pretty much finished already. We headed into the office. “Babe can you walk in first.”

“Oh come on Pixis doesn’t hold a grudge, he wasn’t even mad I think he found it funny.” Eren laughed.

“Still, can you just go first,” I asked.

“Alright if it makes you feel better.” We walked up to the office and I let Eren walk in first. I waited a moment before heading in after him with my eyes glued to the ground.

“There they are,” Pixis said. He had us take a seat. “Levi, are you feeling okay?” He asked. I looked up at him.

“I’m okay,” I mumbled. I still couldn’t tell if he was mad or not.

“Looks like he’s scared,” Shadis said with an amused smile.

“Oh about telling us to leave?” Pixis laughed, “no need to be scared of us. I thought it was quite entertaining. Anyway, I wanted to talk to you both about the mission. We are just waiting on one more-,” he started to say until I heard someone walk in the room behind us. I turned around and looked. “Oh, there she is.” Nanaba came in and took a seat by us.”

“So I’m just going to ask the question straight out. Do you think if we practice enough we will be able to do it tomorrow night?”

“Wait,” Eren spoke up a little panicked. “I thought we were going to try and run through a few different practice routines, and actually get to know the other group of exiled’s powers and how they work in different situations?”

“I second that,” Nanaba spoke up, “we don’t know how our groups will work together,”

“I know. We were, but things have changed,” Pixis sighed, “I had Molbit keep an ear out for any big activity with the guards. He says that a bunch of guards are shipping out in the next few days.”

“And you think they could be going to help reinforce the camp?” I asked.

“I mean there could be other explanations for it, but it’s better to be safe than sorry. There were already a lot of guards to start, but if they add more then I don’t think we will be able to win.”

“So basically you’re saying it’s now or never,” Eren mumbled.

“Yes. I need all of us to be in agreement before I okay this.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before opening them and looking at us, “First off, Do you think we will be ready? Secondly, do you think we should still go through with the mission.”

“No.” Eren said plainly, “ we aren’t ready and we will never be ready in such a small amount of time, but it doesn’t matter, we have to try anyway.”

“I agree,” Pixis nodded.

He looked to Shadis and for once he agreed with us. “It’s risky, but it’s a risk we have to take.”

They all looked at me to hear my answer. It was extremely risky, and there was no way we would be able to get enough practice to pull this mission off perfectly. Not to mention we don’t even know how the other exiles powers work. I already know my answer, they already know my answer. “I agree with Eren we won’t be ready, but we have to try regardless.”

Both Eren and I are bias when it comes to this question since we were the ones who almost rushed in to save Ilsa during our recon mission. Hell Pixis and Shadis might even be a little bias. Nanaba is the only one who doesn't know Ilsa and won’t be influenced to make a reckless decision based on her. Her vote on the situation could make or break everything, and Pixis knows that. I wonder if that’s the reason he needs all of us to agree because he knows how bias our group is, and he wanted to make sure that our group wouldn’t put their group in danger because of our bias.

We all turned to Nanaba. I glanced at Eren and I could tell he was thinking the same thing I was. I know none of us would judge her for saying no and shutting this down, but a part of me knows that if she does Eren and I will be going to that camp anyway.

“Looks like I have the final say,” she sighed.

“It appears so, don’t let us change your mind, just say whatever you are thinking,” Pixis told her.

“Well, I don’t think we are ready to take on the camp.”


	35. Suit Up

“Well, I don’t think we are ready to take on the camp,” Nanaba paused for a moment, “however, with our groups combined I think we should still try. There’s no saying if we will ever get a chance like this again. Freeing a camp would be a big win for all of us. There’s no telling how much information we could get, let alone the people we could free. However, I will say if things get too dangerous we should know when to bow out and count our losses.”

“We will. We are going to be in contact with every team leader and we will tell them if it’s time to bow out.”

“Good,” Nanaba nodded.

“I think we should do a few practice runs tonight, and some more tomorrow morning through afternoon, just enough to hopefully have everyone get the basics down.”

“I think that would be best,” Nanaba said before standing, “I’ll gather my team and tell them to suit up.”

“I’ll do the same for mine,” Pixis said standing. We all left the room Eren and I to get changed and Pixis and Shadis to let everyone else know to meet them in the training area.

After we got in our costumes we headed straight down the stairs to the training area. There were already a few people down here but most of them were standing off to the side.

“Hey guys,” Sasha said, waving us over. We walked up and before I could even ask why we were standing off to the side she told us. “They have us waiting here while Petra changes the layout to match how the camp looks. Obviously she's going to scale it down, but still, I’m excited. I wonder how they are going to do the guards? Are they going to have me use my power? Maybe they will have the people who aren’t going to be part of the mission be the guards? No, that might be too dangerous. I don’t know what they are planning, I can’t wait and see.”

Oh my god, my head started hurting listening to her ramble on. “Sasha we love you, but please slow down,” I said, trying to be as nice as possible. I was still a little out of it and she was talking a mile a minute.

“Sorry,” she laughed, “I forgot I was talking out loud for a moment there. But who do you think they will use as the guards?” She asked me.

“I don’t know, who knows they might not even use any guards. We might be just doing a basic run-through,” I said. I mean I don’t know what practice they had planned, but as long as we know the basics of what we are doing then we should be fine.

“Levi Sasha, can I actually pull you aside,” Eren asked. I followed his gaze and he was motioning for Jean and Marco to join us. “As team leader, I want to run over a few things before we start.” I could hear the implication in his tone.

“Yeah sounds good,” Sasha said grabbing my arm and dragging me over to Jean and Marco before I could even answer.

“So how are we going to do this run-through because I’m assuming we will be doing something different during this run through than in the real deal,” Sasha whispered to our team after making sure we were out of everyone's earshot.

“That's what I was going to bring up. Yes, we will be switching it up, but only a little. We are going to be very calm during this run through and we are going to stay in perfect formation, however, when it comes to the actual mission we will be running further ahead and taking more reckless actions obviously,” Erens said, before looking around making sure Marlowe and Hitch weren’t down here yet. “Also I want to add that there are two more people on our team. When it comes to the actual mission we will have to make sure to keep them safe at all costs, understand?” He asked. “We signed up to be reckless, but they didn’t understand?”

Everyone seemed to be in agreement that they were to protect them. “So which ones are joining us on our team?” Sasha asked before Eren saw them walk down.

“Here they come act natural,” he whispered before waving them over.

Before they came over Sasha let out a gasp, “they’re children.”

“She’s 16, and he’s 17,” I whispered, not sure if it would make her feel better or not. I mean she was thinking they were younger than that, but even correcting her she still seemed unnerved by how young they were.

“It was either them, or Rico, and Rico on the front lines, at the time it seemed like a bad idea,” Eren shrugged.

“It still sounds like a bad idea,” I mumbled.

“But a better idea than this,” Sasha whispered back just as they walked up.

“This is the team we’re on right?” Hitch asked and Eren nodded.

“It’s a pleasure to be working with you,” Marlowe said, giving us a smile.

Sasha was losing her damn mind. Her thoughts were panicked about how these kids are too young to be on the front lines and how she will do everything in her ability to protect them from harm's way.

I just patted her on the shoulder. She looked at me and I leaned in and whispered, “this isn’t their first dangerous mission, they know the drill.” She still seemed pretty panicked about everything but she gave me a nod anyway.

Before I could say much of anything Pixis addressed everyone. It seemed Petra finished with the smaller-scale version of the camp. “Alright everyone, gather around,” he announced.

“I’m sure you are all wondering why we brought you in for practice this late. That is because we finally know when we will be doing the mission. However, it is a lot sooner than we had previously anticipated.” He cleared his throat before looking around the room at everyone, “that being said you will all have the option to back out if you think the mission is too reckless,” he looked to Nanaba.

“The mission is now taking place tomorrow night,” she said and the room exploded. People were confused scared and just straight up panicking about the time jump.

“Quiet down, let them finish,” Shadis said, getting everyone’s focus back on them.

“We know that this is way too soon, however, we have reason to believe that more guards are shipping out to the camp to help reinforce it in the next few days. We have to act now or we might never get another opportunity. So it’s now or never, that being said does anyone want out of the mission knowing this?”

The room fell completely silent as everyone looked around. Everyone looked around and finally, Ymir stepped forward. “I’m sure I speak for everyone at least in our group when I say, we are ready to do whatever it takes to take down this camp,” she said looking around and I saw a lot of people nod with her and others mumble in agreement.

“We want everyone to be freed,” Christa said becking up Ymir.

“Not to mention the information we can get from the camp,” Armin said.

“Not to mention that most of us have a personal vendetta,” Reiner said, “We want Ilsa brought home safely. The last thing we want is for her to spend god knows how much longer in that hell hole.”

“I’m in, I’ve been dying to knock some heads in,” Rico shrugged.

We looked around at the rest of the people who still seemed to be on the fence. Most of them came around and agreed that this was too good of an opportunity to pass up.

“I’m glad everyone agrees,” Pixis said before looking over at our team, Eren and me specifically, “I feel like if we didn’t end up going through with the missions some of you would have planned your own reckless mission, so that’s one crisis averted.”

“I think he knows,” Eren whispered to me.

“No shit, I mean we weren’t very secretive about it,” I mumbled back.

“With that being said, let’s start practicing,” Pixis announced.


	36. Practice Starts Now

“For this first round of practice, I want to start with just a basic run-through of where the teams will be positioned, as you can see there are no roofs on the smaller scale building. That is because I just want to make sure we have a clear idea of our basic form without anyone having to use a lot of their powers, or any at all,” Pixis said leading us over to the area Petra had just finished making.

I noticed that even the people who weren’t on the mission were still sitting off to the side in their costumes. I guess they were going to help us train if necessary.

“Everyone get in your teams,” he said before turning to me, “except you Eren, I have a specific job for you during the first few run-throughs.”

“Okay, what will I be doing?”

“Would it be okay if you used your power a little?” He asked.

“Sure. What will I be using it for?”

“I want you to make yourself weightless and float over the training area and make sure everyone is following the plan. As for your team, they will still be taking your orders through Levi who will be relaying your thoughts to the rest of your team. Feel free to call out any mistakes you see, and if you see anything that needs to change make sure to tell us.”

“Okay, I can definitely do that,” I nodded before looking at Levi and making sure he heard everything.

I didn’t even need to explain anything since he was already listening in. Sometimes having a nosey boyfriend is a good thing. I thought just to watch him roll his eyes at me and mouth the words Smartass.

I got into position and waited for Pixis’s okay. We gave everyone a little time to talk to their teammates and get a good feel for each other. He waited for everyone to settle down before addressing them. “Alright everyone, we are about to start. For the first two rounds, I’m going to have Eren watching over us and making sure everything is going smoothly.” He gave me a nod and I made myself weightless and positioned myself over the training area.

He pulled all the groups closer together before having Petra walk up to where the control room was located. She put a temporary hole in the wall as a door. So people wouldn’t have to use their powers for these practice runs.

“Anything you would like to add?” Pixis asked, calling up to me.

“Actually could you guys announce what you are doing as a set by set so we know why certain things are happening,” I asked. Team leaders might be giving different directions to their teams so it’s best that I am aware of what’s happening so I can easily follow along with anything that might seem a little different.

“Great idea,” Pixis said before looking at the groups, “you heard him. Anything else?” He asked me.

“Nope, I think that’s it.”

Pixis nodded and gave a countdown before announcing to everyone that practice has started. Erwin shrugged and just announced “I am astral projecting to get a clear image of where I need to place the portal,” Erwin said.

Mina looked at Pixis who gave her a nod. She walked forward and announced that she had “possessed the guard in the control room.”

Erwin stepped forward now, “I have exited the astral, and am now placing a portal in the control room.” He said before walking into the room that Mina was standing in. “If there is a second or third guard I will take them out from behind. Once I do that I will gesture for the rest of the teams to join.” He said before sticking his arm through the hole in the wall and waving them in.

“Team B is entering,” Pixis announced. “Also at this point, I will be caring Mina’s body,” he explained and Mina nodded. I guess they’ve already discussed this.

“I am going to instantly shift into one of the guards that are in the room. I will take their clothes and head through the halls trying to gather the keys to the class,” Nanaba said before she started walking down the hallway.

“While Nanaba is walking I will be trailing behind her while invisible to help her gather keys, as well as make sure the other guards don’t catch on to her,” Armin said as he followed her down the halls.

“I will have a spirit watching over and helping if possible,” Ymir spoke up.

Everything is good so far. The rest of the teams entered the control room while they did their rounds. When they came back to the control room, Levi spoke up. “Our team will start heading to where they keep the red and green badge prisoners.” Well, that was our original plan, however, with this visual layout of the camp, I notice a major flaw in my plan.

“Hold,” I called out before lowering myself down and sitting on a wall. I called Pixis and Levi over down the hall for a moment to discuss the issue.

“Is something wrong?” Pixis asked.

“Yeah, my plan is flawed,” I sighed,

“What do you mean?” Pixis said.

Levi looked confused until he looked at my thoughts and he just let out a long, “Oooh, I was wondering about that too.”

Pixis just sat there confused waiting for an explanation.

“So I only heard about the camp’s layout from Ymir’s spirit friends, and Armin, however, picturing the layout it was a lot different than the actual camp’s supposed layout. That being said there are two rooms that we pass before actually hitting the Red and Green badge prison area. That means we have to first check those rooms and make sure that no one is able to sneak up behind us. However we have to be stealthy while taking out those rooms, or the fight will get started a lot sooner, and a lot closer to the control room which is where we want the fight the farthest from.”

“Do we know what rooms those are?” Levi asked.

“Armin,” I said waving him over.

He walked over awkwardly. “Um, what’s up Eren?”

“You remember the layout of the camp right?”

“Yeah, I mean not perfectly, but enough that this whole layout seems sorta familiar,” he shrugged.

“Do you know what those two rooms are?” I said pointing at the doorways of them which were just holes in the walls.

“Yeah, that one I believe was the morgue.” He said and it sent shivers down my spine. Morgue. I don’t even want to know why they have a morgue here a part of me knew, but I didn’t want to confirm the horrid theory that flashed through my mind.

“Do you remember how many people were in the morgue?” I asked, trying to keep a calm composure.

“Living people?” Armin asked awkwardly. He sounded like he was almost begging for me to ask for the living count rather than the dead.

“Yes, alive.” Not helping Armin, how am I supposed to stay positive when you make it seem like there was an abundance of dead people in the morgue.

“When I was checking it out there were only two,” he rubbed at the back of his neck. There was someone who I assume is the diener and someone who looked like a guard.

“And that one?” I pointed to the other room

“That one I think was just a room for the guards to sleep,” Cause when I popped into that room that's all I saw.

“Oh god,” I thought that was farther over, “that’s going to be harder to work with,” I mumbled. The two people in the morgue could overpower quite easily, but a room filled to the brim with guards now will be near impossible to take down stealthily.

“Not necessarily,” Levi mumbled to himself. The other two seemed very confused. “I have an idea, just trust me,” he said before calling over two people.

“Christa, Rico, can we have a word with you?” Levi said and they both walked over.

Rico looked around at us with a raised eyebrow. Christa, on the other hand, just gave us an awkward smile.

“You called?” Rico asked.

“We ran into a little hiccup and I think you two will be the perfect people to solve it.”

“Are you sure about this?” Pixis asked. I don’t think he knew where Levi was going with it, and in all honesty, neither did I.

“Well, we found out that there are very few people in the morgue so I was thinking that Christa can quickly and easily take out the guards in that room, but only if you are up for it?” Levi asked.

“Are you sure I would be strong enough?” she asked nervously.

“I’m positive, I’ve seen your power at work, and honestly it’s scary how powerful you are,” I said giving her a pat on the shoulder.

“Well, what would I need to say?” She asked with a nod.

“Just something that would incapacitate them, whether it has them handcuff themselves or-.”

“Like having them knock themselves out?” She asked.

Levi looked a little caught off guard but nodded, “yeah that should work.”

“What do you what me to do?” Rico asked crossing her arms waiting for an answer.

“This room here will be filled with sleeping guards. Do you think you can knock them all out? No killing them, just knock them unconscious with some sort of gas.”

“Of course I can,” she said rolling her eyes.

“Well, if Eren okays it then that plan could work,” he said looking at me. I mean his plan was better than mine. I was just going to have Annie or I make the door unopenable, however, that would drain Annie’s power or mine.

“If Pixis says it’s okay I think it’s the best chance we got to take down the first two rooms without bringing the fight closer to the control room.

“Well, I seem to be outvoted here,” he mumbles. “It will be really risky, then again this whole mission is risky. I can’t say no if these two already agreed, but I still think we should run it by Nanaba,” Pixis said and Rico let out a long sigh.

“That’s the quickest way to get this vetoed,” She huffed.

“That may be so, however, you are part of her team and we can’t make risky decisions about her team without filling her in,” he said before calling her over.

He had a point, but at the same time, felt a bit of guilt rise up inside of me. I know my team will be pulling some risky stunts, and with those two kids with us, I can’t help but feel like I should have gone with Rico after all. She seemed to be more up to lying to Nanaba and Pixis, and she definitely seems like a reckless person. Hell going into a room filled with guards alone, that’s riskier than some of the stunts we will be pulling.

“She’d fit right in,” Levi leaned in and whispered to me.

It’s probably too late to change the teams, huh?

“Definitely,” Levi sighed.

“Mind filling us in on your conversation?” Pixis asked. Nanaba rounded the corner and I let out a sigh of relief. He instantly started talking to her rather than focus on what we were doing.

“What's up?” She asked.

“Well, there seems to be a change of plan. We all were spitballing some ideas, but some of them are risky and we need your say in them,” he said and I could tell by the look on her face she didn’t seem like she would agree to any of these.

Pixis explained the plan to her and she stayed quiet through the whole explanation until Pixis asked for her input.

“No way, that is way too risky,” she said, “Rico will not be doing that.”


	37. Connected

"Wait, Nanaba, look I know you are just trying to keep me safe, but I can do this. Besides this is the best chance we've got and you know it." Rico said, trying to convince her.

"But-."

"No but's, look I know the risk, and I'm willing to accept it. We need to get the information and free the people, no matter the costs. You have to trust me when I say I can do this."

Nanaba just stayed quiet for a few minutes staring at Rico's unwavering stubborn face. She finally broke. "Fine," she mumbled. "I can't believe I'm agreeing to this." She closed her eyes and rubbed at her temples before turning back to Rico, "I swear to god if you get hurt I'm going to be so pissed off."

"If I get hurt then I kill whoever hurt me," she shrugged.

"Maybe don't go that far," Nanaba mumbled, "but I get what you're saying."

"Alright, we will add that into the play." Pixis nodded patting Nanaba on the back before leaning in and whispering, "the kids are so stubborn nowadays."

"I know, I have no clue where they get it from," she mumbled. I bursted into laughter, and I wasn't the only one Levi and Rico were right there with me. Armin and Christa bless their hearts, just stared at us a little confused.

"Alright everyone, we are starting from the point after Nanaba and Armin finish grabbing the keys." He announced as everyone headed back into the control room.

Pixis had Rico and Christa fill the rest of their team in. Levi filled in both my teams and team C of the changes while Nanaba and Pixis filled in the rest of their team. When they were done Pixis gave me a nod to let me know that they were all ready to start back up again. I made myself weightless and gave Pixis a thumbs up.

"Alright Start," he called out.

They started back up. "We just finished gathering all the keys," Nanaba said again letting everyone know where we left off.

"Teams A is heading into the hallway," Levi announced. "We are checking to make sure the hall is clear."

"Team C is following behind team A and entering the hallway," Hanji called out.

"Team D is following team A and C and entering the hallway," Berthold announced.

"I am using my heat vision to check how many people are in the morgue and the guard barracks as well as making sure that none are coming out into the hallway," Marlowe said after looking at Levi.

Oh, that's a good idea. Nice addition. I thought to Levi and he gave me a smile and a thumbs up.

Ymir spoke up next, "I am sending a spirit to check out the two rooms. "They will tell me what the people in the morgue are doing, or holding, and if anyone is awake in the guard's barracks, so our teammates will know what they are getting into."

"Oh, that's smart," I mumbled to myself. I didn't even think of doing that.

"I am entering the morgue," Christa said before walking into the room.

"I am entering the guards' barracks," Rico said walking into the room.

They both walked out and walked back to their team. I looked at Levi and thought to him. Keep it toned down so no one gets too worried. Stay with the other groups.

He gave me a tiny nod before announcing, "Team A is entering the red and green badge cell area," and with that my team walked through the doorway.

Team C and D followed. They all announced how they would take out the guards and how they would act. Team A announced they were moving on to the next hallway. Team C stayed behind with team D for a moment. Team A waited for them in the hallway. Which I can say definitely wouldn't be the case for the real run-through.

"Team C has finished healing everyone and is sending them to the control room," Hanji called out.

"Team D has finished up the fight and incapacitated all of the guards in this area," Berthold announced.

Team C and D met back up with team A in the hallway. "Team A is entering the blue badge cell area," Levi announced and the other teams followed his lead. When they finished in there they headed into the hallway to make sure no guards would enter in through the entrance on that side. They waited for team C and D to finish and meet up with them before announcing they were heading back to team B and were ready to walk through the portal back home.

"That was a good run-through everyone," I announced before coming down to meet them.

"Good, we will be doing it a few more times, but this time you will be joining us rather than watching," Pixis told me.

"Okay, I'm ready," I said heading over to my group.

We did a few more run-throughs like this before Pixis announced that we need to practice with enemies. He pulled Sasha from my team and asked for her to lend a hand as well as the others who were standing there watching us.

Pixis pulled Levi and me aside to talk to us. "I'm sorry you will have to do this without Sasha," he told me and I nodded.

"I mean she's getting practice too," I shrugged, "just a different kind of practice. All that matters is that she's prepared to fight when the time comes. , and don't worry I'll make sure she knows exactly what to do the whole mission." said looking at her and she nodded in agreement.

"That's right, besides I pretty much got my role down already I know what I'm supposed to do Levi and I talked about it." She said.

I looked at Levi a little confused but waited for Pixis to head back to his own groups before mentally asking what she meant.

"She's worried about the two kids in the group so she and I discussed it saying that her power would be great to protect them. They literally have a wall of Sasha bodyguards protecting them from harm." Levi shrugged.

"That's actually genius," I mumbled as we walked back to our group.

We did a run-through without any call outs this time which was a little harder and we made more mistakes since Thomas's power wasn't connecting the team leaders so we didn't coordinate as well. We finished the run-through and all of us looked defeated. It's not like any of us were actually hurt anywhere except for our pride.

"Hey it's alright everyone, that's why we are practicing, so stuff like this doesn't happen during the real thing," Pixis said trying to lighten everyone's mood.

"We are going to do one more run-through tonight with enemies," he announced and Thomas's hand shot up. Pixis nodded and let him speak.

"I know we weren't going to be using people's powers today, but can we make an exception, I think mine would help everyone especially since my power takes a little getting used to."

Pixis looked to Nanaba for permission and when she nodded he gave the okay. "Alright, let's give it a try," he said.

We pulled all the team leaders aside. Pixis, Nanaba, Hanji, Berthold, and myself all walked over. Pixis classifies Nanaba as a co-team leader since he admits he is biased. He wants her to be able to make calls involving her own group as well as call him out on stupid shit based on what's happening on the actual mission.

"Thomas activated his power and I heard voices in my head that weren't my own and damn he was right this is going to take some getting used to. My head hurts just trying to keep track of the voices. I wonder if this is what Levi feels like constantly.

"Damn right," he yelled across the room at me, "sucks doesn't it." He laughed.

Everyone was looking at him like he was crazy. Someone is enjoying this too much.

"So how it works is you have to kinda set it up in your own mind as a room where you are all sitting in, and when you want your thoughts to go to another person you think about the room and a person. You can think about their name or face. Everyone in the room will hear it, but they will know who it's directed at. If you don't imagine this then all the thoughts will crowd you at once and overwhelm you."

I closed my eyes and I could all of a sudden see a room. It wasn't a room I recognized. It was someone else's thought. Nanaba's I think. It was a smallish room that had no doors or windows. We were all sitting around a table with empty chairs.

I thought to her asking why there were some chairs empty. She thought back that this is the room that Thomas showed her the first time he used his power on them. There are seven chairs, one that is solely for Thomas and six more that he can add people too.

That's right he did say he can connect up to seven people including himself.

Exactly. Also anytime you think of an image that you want to show someone or the others it will appear on the table. Nanaba explained.

"We should get started, so we can try and squeeze in two run-throughs before my power starts to backlash," Thomas suggested. "With five people connected we only have about an hour."

"Noted," Pixis said before having everyone head back over to their team.

I looked at Levi and spoke to him rather than think to him. "Can you still read my thoughts with his power on me, last time you tried that it didn't go over well?"

"I'm prepared for it now, besides there's a difference between reading your mind and reading a stranger's mind," he said before letting out a devious smile. "Just make sure not to think any bad thoughts while they are in your head, we wouldn't want that," he whispered in my ear."

"Fuck you," I said but all I could think now was, don't think anything bad don't think anything bad don't think anything ba-."

Damn Eren we heard you the first 20 times, Hanji's laugh echoed in my head, We get it you don't want to think anything bad, but you do realize you have to be thinking of the room when you think said things so stop panicking.

It's very hard to separate the room from any of my thoughts at the moment, I thought back.

Nanaba was just laughing in my head, don't worry if anything slips, it will happen eventually, trust me we've seen it all in here I don't judge.

That's even worse, don't tell me that. Besides, it's not you I'm worried about. I thought especially about Hanji. Who knows what she would do with anything that might slip from my mind.

Before anyone could say anything I just glared at Levi seeing a smile slip across his face. "Think of this like payback from all the times you thought bad things to me in public and made me suffer. If I was you, I'd remember this the next time you do try that shit again."

"I hate you," I said but he just ignored me and leaned in my ear before whispering dirty things in my ear.

"Alright everyone let's get started," Pixis called out trying to hide his laughter. I looked over at Berthold who was also trying not to laugh. He had his hand over his mouth and his eyes closed.

This is going to be one hell of an hour. Is it possible to die from embarrassment? I'm sure I've already let one or two thoughts slip. I have kept my eyes away from the table. I don't even want to know if any images have appeared on it from my mind. This fucking sucks. My boyfriend is the literal devil.


	38. Frustrated

Those last two run-throughs were pure torture. I could barely concentrate and I’m positive I’ve let a few thoughts slip in my head. The first time through we did a lot better though. We only made a few mistakes and on the last run-through of the night, we made even fewer. Thomas’s power only lasted enough for those two run-throughs, and it was already getting pretty late so Pixis called it a night.

“I want all of you to be ready to train again tomorrow morning,” he said before dismissing us. Walking back to our room I death glared Levi the whole way there. Levi, on the other hand, had that stupid shit-eating grin.

We got in the room and I grabbed him and pushed him up against the wall.

“What the fuck was that today?” I asked.

“What, I was just giving you a taste of your own medicine,” Levi shrugged before staring me dead in the eyes. “What are you going to do about it?”

Oh, so that was your plan. Purposely piss me off so I’d fuck you? I thought to him and saw him smile. “Well fine you get your wish I’m cashing in on the bet,” I said before throwing him down against the bed.

“You’re punishing me by doing exactly what I want?” He asked with that same stupid smirk.

“Not exactly,” I said before using my power on him. I increased the gravity on his body. It was enough to make sure he couldn’t move, but not enough to hurt him.

Levi just smiled before mumbling, “kinky.”

I moved in between his legs and moved his legs over my knees. I pulled his shirt off of him before placing a hand right on his crotch and rubbing him through his pants. I did it slowly and lightly enough so that he would barely feel it. I watched that stupid smile drop from his face as he got annoyed.

“Something wrong?” I asked, trying to keep a clueless face but a devious smile slipped through.

He rolled his eyes before mumbling “I don’t know what you mean, nothing’s wrong,” he said and I could hear the stubbornness in his voice.

I kept up the slow pace every once in a while I would rub a little harder just to back off again. I could feel him getting frustrated before he finally let out a groan, “Fuck Eren, you're so fucking slow,” he practically growled.

“Well, what do you want me to do?” I asked smugly.

I watched as Levi pieced it together and his eyes looked away from mine. “I’m not going to beg for anything Eren, I still have my dignity.”

I leaned in close to his ear before whispering “you say that now, but soon I’ll have you screaming my name begging for me to fuck you harder.”

“Yeah, sure you will,” Levi rolled his eyes, but I could see the faint blush over his cheeks.

I placed my hands on his hips and pulled him closer to me before sliding off his pants. He was already really hard. I went back to rubbing him through his boxers keeping it a slow pace.

“I fucking hate you,” he groaned. I could tell he wanted nothing more than to grind up against my hand. Too bad I made it impossible for him to do so.

“I get it you want me to suffer, but come on babe this fucking sucks,” he said getting more and more frustrated.

“Well, what would you like me to do?” I asked and he rolled his eyes.

“I want you to go fuck yourself,” he mumbled, “I’m not begging for shit.”

“Suit yourself,” I shrugged.

I slid off his boxers and watched as he raised an eyebrow. Stop trying to read my mind. I thought to him. There’s no way I’m going to let him in on what I have planned. He just has to wait and see.

“You’re the worst,” Levi mumbled.

I ignored him and scooted back and pulled my shirt off before leaning down. I licked down the shaft of his dick and he closed his eyes. “Just sit back and enjoy yourself,” I laughed.

“I don’t trust you,” he mumbled.

“You probably shouldn’t,” I said before taking him in my mouth. I bobbed my head up and down making sure to listen to Levi’s moans and his breathing. I heard his breathing start to become more labored and his moans slipping past his lips.

“Fuck babe, if you keep that up-” he started to say and instantly I pulled my head up. “Why’d you stop?”

“I’m sorry did you want me to keep going?” I asked.

Levi just stared at me with a glare in his eyes. “Fuck you,” he said. I could hear the frustration in his voice as he groaned. “Can we stop with all these games.”

“What games?” I asked, “All I keep asking is what you want me to do, you’re the one not answering,” I shrugged.

I grabbed the lube from our stuff and I heard him mumble, “finally,” to himself. I put some on my fingers and slipped one in his ass. I purposely made sure not to do it how he liked. I kept a slow pace and refused to go deep. When I finally added a second finger I felt him snap a little. “Eren I swear to fucking god!” He groaned, “Are you going to keep this petty shit up this whole time?”

I just stayed quiet before pulling my fingers out. My dick was straining against my pants so I finally took a moment to slip off my pants and boxers. I slipped on a condom before I put my hands back on his hips and pulled him closer to me. I rubbed my dick on his ass for a moment before stopping.

“For fucks sake Eren would you cut this shit out,” Levi groaned.

I just laughed before leaning into his ear and whispering, “I’ll cut this out when you say the magic words.”

Levi let out a long groan, “Fine,” He rolled his eyes, “Fuck me Eren,” he mumbled.

“I can’t hear you,” I said back.

“I said fuck me Er-AH!” I cut him off by shoving my dick in him. I stopped using my power on him. 

The first thing he did was smack me upside the head. “You’re an ass,” he said before wrapping his arms around me. I stopped moving and he instantly rolled his eyes. “Fine I didn’t mean it, babe please,” he said, grinding up against me.

“Hmm, I don’t know,” I mumbled.

“Please babe, fuck me,” he said before placing a kiss on my lips.

“You really want me to fuck you?” I asked.

“Yes, I want you to fuck my brains out,” he said grinding his hips down on my dick.

“Your wish is my command,” I said before hooking my arms under his legs and picking Levi up and slamming him against the wall. I shoved my dick back in him. He squirmed as a moan slipped past his lips. “Fuck me harder babe.”

I loosened my grip on his legs and let gravity do the work. Levi sank further down on my cock as he moaned out. I thrusted into him as he dug his nails into my back. Levi’s dick was rubbing up against my stomach, and I could feel the pleasure building up inside of him.

“Someone’s feeling good,” I said but in all honestly I couldn’t tell who the emotions were coming from. With the intensity of them, I could only assume they were coming from both of us.

“Damn right, fuck babe.” Levi smashing his lips up against mine. “I’m close,” he said, breaking away from the kiss.

While he took a moment to breathe I took the time to mark up his neck as some payback. “I don’t even fucking care,” he moaned, “You’re the only one who cares if people see the hickeys.”

I bit his shoulder and he let out a moan. He put his hand under my chin and grabbed my face before pulling me into a kiss. Levi started to match my thrusts and ground his hips down on my dick. My thrusts started getting sloppier the closer I got. I could tell Levi was really close by how heavy he was panting.

I told him to hook his leg around my waist. He did that and I moved one of my arms out from under his leg so I could stroke his dick. “If you do that I’ll- ah!” Levi started to say so I squeezed his dick to stop him from coming.

“Ah fuck!” Levi groaned as he buried his head in the crook of my neck before nipping at my neck to stop from screaming out.

“Just a little longer babe,” I said, thrusting into him faster and faster. When I knew I was at my limit I started pumping his dick letting him cum. The second Levi came I felt him tighten on me. That was enough to throw me over the edge. I came and I felt my knees start to get weak. I walked both of us back over to the bed. I set him down and laid down next to him.

“That was hot,” Levi breathed.

“See things are so much better when you beg for them,” I said and Levi rolled his eyes.

“Don’t push it,” he laughed.

“How about we go for round two?” I asked and I watched Levi close his eyes.

“As fun as that sounds, we can’t.”

“What? Why not?” I pouted.

“Because I need to be able to walk tomorrow,” Levi laughed before placing a kiss on my cheek. “

“Oh shit I totally forgot,” I said wrapping my arm around his waist, “will you be okay tomorrow?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine, a little uncomfortable during training, but for the actual mission, I should be fine. I’m more worried about your back,” he said and I winced a little.

“Oh shit, yeah those scratch marks are going to be so irritated when I put a shirt on.”

“Sorry, rollover,” he said. I was a little confused but did it anyway. I felt his lips kiss all down my back. “Better?”

“Much,” I smiled before turning back around and throwing my arms around him.


	39. Too Late to Switch

I didn’t even remember falling asleep, but suddenly I was woken up to a hand shaking my shoulder. I opened my eyes and looked up to see who was waking me. I thought it might be Levi at first but then I realized he was still sleeping in my arms. When my vision cleared I saw Pixis standing above me.

“Oh good you’re awake,” he mumbled before quickly turning around and looking away from me. “I’m waking everyone who overslept,” he said as a quick explanation and I realized that it was already morning. Levi and I must have overdone it cause neither of us woke up early today.

A moment more I realize why Pixis was acting so weird. Not only were Levi and I both only in boxers with the covers mostly hanging off of us, but we were both also covered in hickeys. Shit.

Before I could say anything I heard Pixis mumble to himself, “thank god I was the one who woke you guys I nearly sent Hanji. Man oh man she would have had a field day,” he shook his head. “Anyway wake Levi and get ready for mission practice,” he said before walking straight out of the room.

I wanted nothing more than to crawl in a hole and die. Of all the people seeing me in this state, why did it have to be Pixis. I think in all honesty I would have preferred Hanji. Sure she would have bullied the shit out of me and Levi, but it would be less awkward. Hanji is more of a friend whereas Pixis is more of a parental figure.

I just lightly shook his shoulder. “Hm?” he mumbled. I couldn’t tell if he was awake or just making noise.

“You up?”

“No,” he mumbled back, “is it already morning?” he asked, letting out a sigh already knowing the answer.

“Yup, get dressed.”

He let out a long sigh before sitting up and rubbing his eyes.

“How’s your back,” I asked. He stretched it out and winced a little.

“Not as bad as I thought it would be, but it still hurts,” he mumbled, “I’ll live. It was totally worth it though,” he said before leaning over and kissing me on the cheek.

He got out of bed and started getting ready and I decided I should do the same. When we had finished getting our costumes on we headed to the training area.

I looked around to see nothing but tired faces all around. I have a feeling these first few runs are going to be filled with mistakes. We should have Thomas save his power for the later runs, or else it will be wasted on careless mistakes.

I walked over to Pixis keeping my eyes glued to the ground. “Morning,” I said awkwardly.

“Good morning,” he said with an awkward nod.

“Everyone looks exhausted.”

“I guess they didn’t believe me when I said we would be getting up early,” Pixis shrugged.

“We should hold off on Thomas’s power until everyone has a chance to wake up,” I suggested.

“Already on it, I sent out a few people before waking everyone. They went to get everyone coffee.”

“Oh, awesome,” I said. Makes sense why some people are missing.

“You should take this time to plan with your team. Also, Sasha is one of the people I sent out.” Makes sense she can carry a bunch of coffees using her clones. As long as she changes the clone's clothes and hairstyle people won’t notice it’s the same person. At worst they'll think they are sisters or something.

“Thanks for the heads up, and yeah I’ll go talk to them now.” I walked back over to my team and noticed that Marlowe and Hitch were talking with Rico and Thomas. I kept my voice low as I addressed Marco and Jean.

“I wanted to talk about the actual plan for this group,” I whispered and they nodded.

“What about Sasha?”

“We will fill her in later,” Levi whispered.

“Before I start I want to remind you that those two,” I said flicking my eyes over towards Marlowe and Hitch, “are to be protected at all costs during this mission.”

“Are you sure we shouldn’t just switch them out for Rico?” Jean asked.

“I know it might be a little late, to do so, but I was talking to her last night and honestly she seems really cool. I’m sure she would be down with our plan.”

“I don’t doubt that she would, but it’s hard to just switch everything around so suddenly-,” I mumbled before Levi nudged my arm. I looked at him and he straightened up. And his eyes flicked behind me.

I turned around and saw Pixis walking up. “What are you guys up to?” Pixis asked.

“Oh just talking about the mission,” I shrugged, “what about you I thought you were going to talk to your team?” I asked.

“I was, but half of my team is missing at the moment, and the ones that are here got their roles down. I just thought I would check in with every other group,” he shrugged.

“So what about the mission were you discussing?” He asked and I was positive he must have heard something that was until I felt Levi’s hand on my back. I instantly felt Levi push his emotions onto me as a calm feeling washed over me. I guess he thought my panicking might blow it.

“We were talking about the team's layout and wondering if it would be too late to change some people around.”

“I mean it probably is, but if you think it will improve how we work then it’s worth considering,” Pixis said shrugging. “What did you have in mind?”

“Well, after a lot of thought we think it will be best to switch Marlowe and Hitch to team D and Rico to team A,” Levi said and Pixis nodded.

“I think I understand why, but explaining your reasoning anyway in case I’m missing something.”

“Well, our team is the front lines, and as helpful as both their powers are we think it’s still too dangerous for them to be in the front lines. Our whole team’s plans are being derailed because we keep worrying about their safety in every scenario.” 

I jumped in, “We also think it makes more sense for Rico to be transferred to our team after assessing how people work together. While I was watching the teams practice together I noticed Rico was butting heads with Reiner a lot. Most of the people on my team have had a chance to talk with Rico and we think we wouldn’t but heads as much.”

“Lastly we think it also makes more sense since she’s going into the guard barracks she would need to be closer to the front rather than towards the back. It would save everyone time rather than having her navigate past the other teams to get to her position.”

Pixis just sat there for a moment thinking it all over. “It’s hard to argue with those points, however, we need to check this change with Nanaba before I okay it. After Nanaba gives her answer we will make sure it’s okay with Rico, Hitch, and Marlowe.”

“Wait so we are actually considering this?” Jean blurted out before covering his mouth.

“It seems so,” Pixis sighed.

“I should have just kept her on the team to start, I don’t know why I changed them around,” I mumbled.

“I mean both of your team setups were good but this makes sense. Honestly, I’m just surprised we haven’t had to switch around anyone else. It just shows you did a great job of setting up the teams.” Pixis said patting me on the shoulder.

I saw people walking through the door and looked over. They were back from their coffee run. They all walked around and passed out all the coffee before I called Sasha over. I quickly told her what we were trying to do while Pixis called Nanaba over.

“I hope she agrees,” Sasha whispered as Pixis and Nanaba started talking.

“So we wanted to know if it was too late to switch around teams?” Pixis asked and I saw Nanaba bring a hand up to her head and rub at her temples.


	40. Stupid and Reckless

Nanaba let out a sigh before nodding, “I figured we would have to switch some people around at some point,” she said before nodding, “so who were we thinking?”

“Only three people would be switching. We were thinking that Rico should switch into team A and Marlowe and Hitch should switch into team D.” Pixis said. 

Before he could even explain our reasoning she agreed. “Do it,” she nodded, “I like that a lot better. Honestly, I was worried about Marlowe and Hitch being in team A, to begin with. It’s not that I’m not worried about Rico, but I know that she can definitely hold her own,” she said, almost letting out a sigh of relief.

“Alright, we are going to check and make sure that it’s okay with them first,” Pixis nodded.

“I’m sure Marlowe and Hitch will be relieved. Rico probably either won’t care, or she’ll be happy to be on the front lines,” Nanaba said before calling the three of them over.

I call over the rest of team D before thinking to Levi. It worked.

When everyone was in front of us we announced to them that people would be switching. When we named them off Nanaba was right I saw a sigh of relief from Hitch and Marlowe. Now I feel bad for asking them to be on the front lines they clearly weren’t comfortable with it. I have to remind myself to tell them that if they ever feel uncomfortable with a team that I make to tell me. If I would have known how worried they were about it I would have switched them a lot sooner.

Rico, on the other hand, wasn’t as happy as Nanaba thought she would be. She had her arms crossed and was staring at us with a confused glare.

“Is this switch okay with everyone?” Pixis asked. Team D agreed and so did Marlowe and Hitch. I half expected Rico to state some objection, but she never did.

“Sure I guess,” she mumbled.

Team D started walking away with their new teammates trying to catch them up on their roles and their plan.

I gestured for Rico to walk closer to me so I could see what she was thinking. “You looked really confused about the switch?” I asked her.

“You said you needed me on that team to make it stronger?” She asked.

Shit, I did say that. “Well, I’m going to be a hundred percent honest. I only said that to make you more interested in joining the team.” I half expected her to hit me, but she stayed quiet, “but I wasn’t fully lying. Your strength would have greatly helped their team, however, I wanted to put you on our team from the beginning but I didn’t know how you would react.”

“React to what?” She asked, glaring into me. Fuck her glare is intense.

“Well, to our plan,” Levi said, stepping in. He could read her better than I could and I’m assuming he would put a stop to me telling her if she wasn’t okay with what we were telling her.

“What plan?” She asked. Her voice wasn’t as harsh this time.

We had made it to the rest of our team. I didn’t think I should tell her right now since if she did react badly the last thing I wanted was her telling everyone. She should be told in private so if at first, she doesn’t agree with it we can try and talk her into it or at least try and have her agree to not tell anyone.

“Pixis incoming,” Levi leaned in and whispered.

I looked back to Rico before Pixis was in hearing range, “Not now, meet me in our room after training we will be having a team meeting there.” I told not only her but the rest of the team.

She looked confused and she watched as Levi and I threw on innocent smiles to greet Pixis. “What’s up?” I asked him.

“We are going to give your team and team D a little more time to fill in your new teammates about their roles,” he said before giving me a pat on the back and heading back to his own team.

I let out a sigh of relief. “Alright, so for these run-throughs here’s what I want you to do,” I said filling in Rico.

After I finished explaining she shook her head, “what do you mean for these run-throughs? Isn’t this what we will be doing for the actual mission?” She asked.

“I'll explain it in the team meeting later, I promise.”

She took a deep breath. I could tell she was frustrated with me avoiding the answers, but this wasn’t a good place to talk about it. She just rolled her eyes but eventually just nodded. “I’ll hold you to that,” she mumbled.

We went through training. The first few had a few mistakes especially since there wasn’t a lot of communication between the team leaders. After Thomas activated his power we were able to squeeze three runs in with that practice. We did them nearly perfectly aside from a few little mistakes, but there was definitely some improvement. After his power wore off we did a few more runs. There were still some communication errors, but not as many as before. After having a nearly perfect run at the end we decided that was a good stopping point. Everyone was exhausted and we had only a few breaks in between each run for people to rest and eat. Nearly the whole day had gone by and we did nothing but train for this mission.

Most people planned to go straight to bed after dinner, but our team still had a meeting planned. We all ate in a tired silence. Levi and I finished eating first and gave our team a nod that let them know we would be waiting in our room. We didn’t all want to leave at the same time that would be suspicious.

We sat down and hoped they would stagger their arrival, but not too much since we did have to make this quick. We all needed to get a ton of rest since we would be waking up in the middle of the night for this mission.

Levi and I were sitting on our bed waiting for the others. Sasha was the first one to join us. She came in and plopped down on the bed laying over both of our laps.

“Comfortable?” I asked and she nodded.

“I’m tired, can the other’s hurry up?” she mumbled with closed eyes.

“Don’t fall asleep,” Levi rolled his eyes.

Rico was the next one to poke her head in. She saw Sasha laying over our laps and nearly asked us what was happening but decided against it.

“Are they here yet?” Sasha asked letting out another yawn.

“We’re just waiting on Jean and Marco,” I mumbled.

She let out a disappointed sigh, “We always are.”

“Quit your bitching we are right here,” Jean said walking in the room with Marco trailing behind him mumbling for him to be nicer.

“Alright, I know you are all grumpy, but can we make it through this meeting without killing each other,” Levi rolled his eyes glaring at both Jean and Sasha.

“Fine,” Jean said before leaning up against the wall.

“Alright, so it’s time to go over our actual plan,” I started before looking over towards Rico, “but first let’s fill her in.”

“If you aren’t okay with something we say they please let us know,” Levi added, “there’s a good chance that you won’t be.”

She squinted at Levi’s words. I could tell she wanted him to explain what he meant by that. So I decided to start talking.

“Well, as you might have realized, this mission is very personal to us-,” I started.

“You’re right I did notice, why is that?”

“Well, everyone here came from the same school, we all were students or teachers there. When Pixis realized where this all was heading he shut down the school and invited us all to come with him. Not all of our fellow classmates decided that it was the best idea. We didn’t think much of it. Most of them weren’t ready to fight so we assumed they would be safe, that was until we did the recon mission at the camp. We had just figured out they were grabbing blue badges just because they existed. When we looked in the camp we saw a familiar face.” I stopped talking. I felt the same rush of anger wash over me.

“One of your friends from the school?” She asked.

“Yeah. The thing that’s getting to us all is that we know the only reason she got grabbed was because she’s a blue badge. She’s the nicest sweetest person you will ever meet, and she’s locked up in a horrible place for nothing more than just existing.” I said through gritted teeth. I crossed my arms hugging my chest and closing my eyes trying to calm down. I felt Levi’s hand on my back.

“That makes sense of why your group seems so determined to free this camp,” she nodded.

“Don’t get me wrong we would still be determined even if we didn’t know anyone there, but…” I let my voice drift off.

“It makes it personal,” she finished, “I get it. What does this have to do with your guy’s plan?”

“Well,” I sighed deciding to just go for it, “I’m stupid and reckless, so I grabbed a group of people who I thought would also be stupid and reckless, and Marco,” I said nodding at him, “he’s only here because his boyfriend is stupid and reckless.”

Marco just smiled at me, “the things I do for love,” he mumbled before grabbing Jean’s hand.

“We are planning on following the plan that I came up with to start with, however, I know that when we all go in we might have a harder time keeping up with the rest of the teams. We are going to make stupid mistakes, and we are going to be running ahead and taking on more enemies than we should. Which is why we wanted to switch Marlowe and Hitch out of the group. I kept telling myself we would be able to protect them, but in all honesty, I don’t think we would be able too.”

“You’re lucky you switched them out, if your stupidity got them hurt I would have killed you,” she said glaring into me.

“I know, and you would have every right too,” I nodded, “that being said, what are your thoughts?”

“My thoughts are that you are all stupid, and are on a suicide mission,” she said folding her arms staring me down. There was a long silence in the room. “I’m in.”

“Wait what?” I asked. Did she just say what I think she did?

“I said I’m in. Someone’s got to keep you all from getting yourselves killed,” she sighed, “and honestly, I guess you can say I’m stupid and reckless too,” she mumbled, “let’s save that friend of yours. You’ve talked her up so much I want to meet her,” she shrugged.

I gave her a big smile and nodded, “okay.”

“You won’t tell anyone?” Sasha asked.

“Of course not, I’m no snitch. Besides, I just agreed to help if I tell anyone imma get my ass beat too.”

She’s got a point. “Well, if that’s all then I’m going to bed,” she said before walking out.

“That went easier than expected,” Sasha mumbled.

“Honestly I expected her to chew us out more,” I said looking at the others.

“Nah, I told you she was cool,” Jean smiled.

The others left for their rooms too and we got ready for bed. After we finished changing we laid down and I knew falling asleep was going to be a pain. I was so nervous about tomorrow and my mind was all over the place. I turned to Levi and apologized.

“It’s fine babe,” Levi said, placing a kiss on my cheek, “just remember we have to get some sleep to perform at our best. Ilsa deserves our best efforts.”

“You’re right,” I sighed. I just needed to find a way to shut down all the thoughts in my mind.

Levi just shrugged and I felt him force an emotion on me. A wave of calmness washed over me. “Better?”

“Actually, yes,” I nodded. I didn’t think that would be as effective as it was.

“Alright now hurry up and go to sleep, or the next one I’m going to make you feel is tired,” he said. I nodded and cuddled up next to him and closed my eyes.

“I love you,” I said. I had to say it before the mission in case I forget to later he has to know that in case something happens.

“I love you too, now would you quit thinning like that. Nothing is going to happen, we are both going to be fine. We will both make it back home,” Levi said his hand caressing my cheek. He placed a kiss on my forehead and pulled me close. Despite what he said I could feel he was just as worried as I was. This mission was going to be riskier than any one we’ve been on so far.

“I promise when this is all over we will get married,” Levi said and I smiled.

“I’ll hold you to that,” I said closing my eyes.


	41. Getting Ready

I sat up in a cold sweat as images of Eren’s lifeless body still flashed behind my eyes. I blinked a few times to clear them before turning to face Eren who a minute ago was sound asleep in my arms, now he’s staring at me wide awake and worried.

“You alright?” he asked.

“I’m fine,” I sighed pulling him into a hug, “I know this mission is going to be reckless, but don’t you dare get yourself killed.”

“I won’t baby, I promise,” he said, placing a kiss on my cheek, “We should probably start getting ready now that we are wide awake.”

He got up and started getting dressed. I was still frozen there on the bed. Eren’s body bloody and lifeless kept flashing into my thoughts. I’m not ready for today. Of all the days to have this kind of nightmare why did it have to be today. I was already worried about how today would go, but now I can’t shake the feeling that something’s going to go horribly wrong.

“Are you going to get dressed?” Eren asked as I was pulled from my thoughts.

I just got up and walked up to him, putting my arms around his waist before kissing his neck.

“Seriously what’s gotten into you?” Eren asked, pushing me back a little and putting his hands on my cheeks.

“Just a bad nightmare,” I whispered before looking him in the eyes, “besides I want you to know how much I love you in case something does go wrong.”

“Baby I know you love me, I love you too, and we will have a lot of time after the mission to keep showing how much we love each other,” he said pulling me into a kiss.

I heard a laugh in the doorway and we both turned to look. “I would say get a room, but technically you are in your room, anyway now isn’t the time for making out now is the time to get ready,” Jean said and I rolled my eyes.

“Says the one who was just making out with Marco for the same reason,” I said staring into Jean’s eyes.

“Fucking mind reader,” he mumbled before collapsing down on our bed.

“Do you mind?”

“Nope not at all,” he laughed. “Don’t mind me just keep getting ready.” He was face down with his eyes closed.

“Where’s Marco. Isn’t he supposed to have you on a leash or something?” Eren asked.

“He’s checking on Sasha to make sure she’s awake and getting ready.”

“It’s good he went to check on her since he wouldn’t just walk straight in on people while they are changing unlike you.” I rolled my eyes.

“It’s not like I haven’t walked in on you two doing other stuff. I’ve seen it all before nothing can surprise me,” he shrugged.

“And whose fault is that?” I asked.

“Maybe if you would actually knock then you wouldn’t have seen anything at all,” Eren said before continuing to get dressed.

“Says the one who’s walked in on me and Marco on more than one occasion,” Jean mumbled.

“That’s different,” Eren huffed, “I actually knock, it's not my fault you two don’t hear me.”

“Same shit,” Jean shrugged. “Levi’s never walked in on us,” Jean said using me as an excuse.

“Not physically,” I mumbled, “usually once I get to your door and knock I’m close enough to hear and see your thoughts so yeah. Technically I’ve still walked in on you guys just not in the same sense,” I said completely destroying his argument.

“Oh,” he mumbled, “I never even thought about that.” He got really quiet for a minute before bursting into laughter, “well did you like what you saw?”

“Not even a little,” I rolled my eyes before sitting on the bed next to him. I just had to secure all my knives and help Eren put his braces on.

When he realized we were done getting changed he sat up and nudged me, “you sure. I mean it’s quite the view,” Jean said and his thoughts went straight to Marco ‘s shirtless sweaty back with Jean’s hands on his hips. I focused on Eren’s thoughts before his thoughts could pan down even further.

“You’re disgusting,” I rolled my eyes.

“What have you never thought of Eren like that?” He asked and Eren turned around desperate to know what we were talking about.

“Of course I do, but I keep it to myself,” I crossed my arms and glared at him.

“I mean it is my mind, you were reading my thoughts so whose the real perv?” Jean asked.

“Still you, I was focusing on Eren’s thoughts until you directed that thought to me,” I raised an eyebrow at him and he went quiet.

“You got me there,” he finally shrugged.

There was a knock at the door and we all turned towards it. “Come in,” Eren answered.

Marco and Sasha came walking in and gave us a weird look.

“You guys aren’t done yet?” Marco asked.

“Your boyfriend kept distracting us,” I said, throwing Jean under the bus.

Marco let out a frustrated sigh, “I told you to make sure they were up and to have them get ready, not to slow the process down.”

“Then you should have done it,” Sasha laughed, “you expected Jean to come in here and not distract them?”

“You have a point,” Marco sighed.

“Hey I got them to stop making out,” Jean said and all eyes were on us.

“We weren’t making out, I gave Levi a kiss because he was worried about the mission,” Eren rolled his eyes.

There was another knock at the door and everyone went quiet. “Come in,” I said this time. Rico poked her head inside and was surprised that everyone was already in here.

“Nanaba asked me to check on my team and make sure they were ready?” She said.

“We’re almost done, I just have to help Eren put his braces on,” I said and Eren sat down on the bed next to me. After we tightened the braces we stood up and dragged Jean out of our bed.

“Alright let’s get going,” Eren nodded. We all walked into the common area and saw almost everyone suited up and ready. Mom was standing there looking around when she saw us and she immediately started walking over.

She pulled Eren and me into a hug, “I want you boys to be safe,” she said before thinking to me. I know how reckless you can be especially when someone you care about is involved, but I can’t lose either of you. I need you to promise me you will come back safely.

“I promise,” I whispered. I was just hoping I could keep that promise.

“Good,” she said before hesitantly letting us go and giving Jean Marco and Sasha hugs as well. She wished us all a safe mission and told us she will be waiting here for us when we get back.

As the last few people walked up Pixis announced that we will be heading out in five minutes. He pulled our team up to the front and told us to prepare ourselves.

I felt as my stomach started knotting up. It wasn’t my feeling, it was Eren’s. He was nervous, he was afraid. He was scared he was going to lead us all into danger, but he was also scared that his plan as a whole wouldn’t work.


	42. Raiding the Camp: Part 1

Pixis walked up to me and patted me on the shoulder, “you look like your panicking,” he said and I shook my head.

“Panicking why would I be panicking, it’s not like everyone's counting on my plan working. It’s not like if it fails people could die,” I said looking up at him. I could hardly breathe.

Before he could say anything I felt Levi’s hand on my shoulder and he leaned into my ear and whispered, “do I need to calm you down?”

“Yes please,” I whispered back. I felt Levi push calming emotions over me and my head started to clear.

“Sorry, I’m okay now,” I told Pixis, “I’m just really nervous.”

“It’s okay to be nervous, hell I’m nervous too, but I’m sure everything will be fine. I have faith in your plan, and in everyone here.” He said patting me on the shoulder. “I'm going to give everyone a few more minutes while I check in with my team.” He said before heading back over to his group.

Levi let out a sigh and mumbled something that sent a chill down my spine, “he’s lying.”

“What?” I asked turning to him.

“I didn’t hear his thoughts, but his emotions gave it away.” Levi looked down at the floor. “He’s very worried and feeling sick which usually means he’s not sure if this is going to work meaning when he said he has faith in every one he was lying. He’s just as scared as the rest of us.” He looked back up at me and let out a sigh. “I shouldn’t have said anything-.”

“No, I’m glad you did,” I nodded, “It actually makes me feel better.”

“How?”

“Well, if he’s nervous and scared too then that means everyone is which means everyone is going to be alert and giving it their all.”

“I have no clue how you came to that conclusion, but whatever helps I guess,” Levi mumbled and I shook my head.

“Shit, we are already running into a problem,” I mumbled.

“What’s that.”

“Well, Erwin is about to go through to check and see if there is a safe spot where no guards can see us portal into the forest right?”

“Yeah? What’s the issue?”

“How is he going to see if there are any guards?” I asked. It just dawned on me how dark that forest was the first time.

“Shit.”

I waved Pixis over and instantly told him about the issue. He nodded before waving Nanaba over and he already seemed to have an idea.

“Nanaba,” he said and she raised an eyebrow. By his tone, we could all tell he was about to ask her for permission for something potentially reckless.

“We have a slight issue, but I think I know how to fix it.” He explained the issue and we watched her eyes narrow for a moment. He didn’t even have to ask her. She already seemed to know what he was going to say.

“You want to send Marlow in with Erwin,” she said and he nodded.

“I don’t know,” she mumbled. There was a moment of silence before she let out a sigh. “If he agrees to it then I guess it’s fine, but if he doesn’t want to then I won’t make him,” she said before looking over at him. “I want to ask him alone,” she said before walking over towards him and asking him to step aside.

They spoke for only a minute or two but waiting here it felt a lot longer. She came back with him following behind her. She looked a little worried, but she stopped in front of us and nodded, “he agreed,” she said and I could hear how disappointed she sounded.

“Alright, ready?” Pixis asked when Marlowe nodded; he called Erwin over and told him the newer plan. Pixis announced to everyone that the mission was starting and that everyone needed to be as silent as possible.

Erwin waited for their say before opening a portal the both of them walked in and a painful minute passed before Marlowe came back through. “The coast is clear.” I took one look around at everyone before we were told to go through. The rest of our group was waiting up with mom. They must have come in while we were all talking. They were probably all waiting up for us but also waiting for Ilsa.

Pixis nodded and gestured for everyone to follow them through. We all walked through and stood there in the forest silent. Marlowe’s voice was low and I couldn’t hear him very well, but he told Pixis and Nanaba where all the guards were he was told to tell them if any of them moved closer. We all stayed there dead silent. It was dark, but I could see the silhouettes of everyone around me if I looked hard enough there was enough light from the camp for us to see at least a little.

We watched as Pixis helped Mina on his back before her body went limp. Once she went limp, Armin's silhouette disappeared and Erwin’s sat down on the floor before his body went limp slouched against the tree.

It’s started. I thought to Levi. He gave my hand a squeeze. We waited patiently for another portal to open. Once one did we all let out a silent sigh of relief before walking in.

Once we were all inside the portal behind us closed and Erwin opened up one directly to our building. “In case we need to make a fast escape,” he told Pixis. Pixis gave him a nod and a pat on the shoulder. I regrouped with my team and saw the rest of the teams do the same.

“Shifter and Ghost have already left,” Pixis said, giving me a heads up that Nanaba and Armin were doing their rounds.

I saw both guards unconscious in the corner while Hannes and Shadis were staring at the security cameras watching them. There were only a few cameras, most of them seemed to be in the prison areas. I didn’t notice any in the hallways. That’s great means my idea should still work.

We anxiously waited for them to come back. Just when I was starting to question if something had happened a guard walked in the room. I was nervous at first before the guard gave us a thumbs up. That’s Nanaba.

“We couldn’t get all the keys, but we got a lot,” she said before Armin appeared behind her holding a bunch of keys.

“Alright, we need to get this mission started before they realize they are missing.”

Thomas brought all the team leaders over and connected us. Hearing their voices in my head for the third time was still a little weird, but it was easier to get the hang of.

Before we started heading towards the door Ymir pulled Rico over. “I have a spirit in the guard barracks when we get close enough I will give you a thumbs up or a thumbs down. Thumbs up mean all the guards are asleep, thumbs down meaning some are awake,” She explained.

“Thank you, I’ll keep an eye out for your call,” she said.

We all got in position. We opened the door and instantly there was a guard staring us in the face. Before he could say anything I used a gravity field to pull him close to me before wrapping my arms around his neck putting him in a chokehold. When he stopped struggling I looked at Levi to make sure.

“He’s out,” he whispered. Hearing that I moved him up against the wall and let him go. We came up on the morgue our team passed it by and Rico stood at the guard barracks door while Christa stood in front of the morgue’s door. Ymir gave Rico a thumbs up and gave Christa a nod.

They both walked in. Christa walked out almost instantly Rico took a little longer making sure her gas knocked them out for a while.

I watched Levi make a face. “What?” I whispered.

“That was one way to knock them out,” he mumbled looking a little shocked. “They both slammed their heads into the wall.”

“Oh damn,” I mumbled looking at Christa who was innocently holding Ymir’s hand and rocking both and forth on her feet. Remind me never to piss her off. I thought and Levi nodded in agreement.

Rico came out and gave us a nod, “they won’t be waking up any time soon, and if they do they won’t be able to move or speak for the next few hours,” she shrugged.

Remind me never to piss her off either. I thought to Levi and he smiled.

I thought to Berthold to see if Marlowe could give us a heads up about what we were looking at in there.

He leaned over and asked him when he got an answer he told me. He can’t tell who's a prisoner and who's a guard, but there’s a lot of heat signatures in that room.

Guess we are going in blind. I thought to Levi before I took a deep breath and thought to the group. Team A is entering the red and green badge prison area.

Be careful I heard Pixis think.

Kick their ass! Hanji’s voice rang out.

I nodded for my team and kicked open the door instantly all the teams ran in. Marco made a mini ice wall blocking the other door stopping the guards from leaving the room and calling reinforcements from the other way. They would have to stand and fight us or try and get around us which wasn’t happening.

Levi and I instantly ran forward at the nearest guards. Guns started to get pointed our way. I made tiny gravitational fields around the room that pulled some people towards them while Levi ripped some of their guns away from them. I saw a few guards on the floor crying and I knew Levi had used his emotions and made them breakdown. Sasha was coming up next to us. She was hiding behind a wall of Marco’s Ice as some more of her doubles charged at the guards taking bullets like they were nothing.

Jean was rounding up some guards with his fire making them move closer to my gravitational fields or closer to Marco so he could freeze them.

Rico walked up and punched guards in the face while they were distracted. They instantly fell to the floor paralyzed. We pushed forward clearing most of the guards in our path. The few that got around us were quickly dealt with by team D and C.

Annie had made a crystal shield protecting team C from one side while Mikasa protected the backside. From behind the crystal shield, Hanji’s vines were taking down some guards while Hanna had overloaded other guards' minds causing them to fall unconscious.

Team D had Berthold stretching himself, tripping some guards and Reiner knocking them out. Christa had people knocking themselves out while Hitch had distracted a few.

Everything was going great once we cleared the first room. This is where we stray from the plan we are supposed to wait for the other teams to catch up with us and finish the fight before moving on. I gave Levi a nod to give our teammates the signal to move forward before thinking to the other team leaders. Team A is moving ahead. We think some guards in the hallway might have noticed Marco’s ice; we have no choice but to proceed before they call for reinforcements.

There was no argument from the other team leaders, okay be careful Pixis thought.

Do whatever it takes to stop that from happening, Hanji thought.

Do we need to leave the control room? Nanaba thought.

No, I think we’ve got this, I thought back. We just have to put a stop to this before it starts a bigger fight. I thought to them before me and my team went running for the door.

Alright do it Nanaba nodded.

We will join you when we can, Berthold thought.

Marco dropped the ice wall and I instantly thought to Levi. I hate lying to them, but we need to keep moving. There were two guards in the hallway. I took out the first one by pulling him close to me and choking him out while Levi threw the other one against the wall and caused him to pass out from a panic attack. Rico walked over and touched both of them before nodding at us. We stared down at the door in front of us.

Everything was going according to plan. I was surprised at how well this all was working.

Levi looked at me and nodded. This one might be a little harder to convince them on. I took a deep breath and thought to the rest of the team leaders, Team A entering the blue badge prison area.


	43. Raiding the Camp: Part 2

Team A entering the blue badge prison area. Eren thought to the other team leaders.

Don’t you think you are moving a little fast? Nanaba asked.

You are going farther ahead than we thought, is it really necessary? Pixis thought.

I’m sure Eren knows what he’s doing. Hanji seemed to have Eren’s back on this one. I wonder if it’s because she knows how reckless he is and is covering for him, or if it’s because she actually trusts him.

We are almost done in our area and will be joining team A shortly I think they will be fine for the time being, besides Eren came up with the plan I’m sure he’s got a good reason for going headfirst into it. Berthold said and I was sure Berthold was covering for him, he did in our last mission too. He was giving Eren enough time to make an excuse.

I do, We are running out of time. This whole mission relies on us being quick and the more we stand here and wait the more time we are wasting. We don’t know when the new guards are showing up, we don’t know when guards shifts are set to change, and it’s going to take Hanji and Franz a while to heal everyone enough to walk some of the prisoners were in bad shape, we need to hurry this along before we run out of time. Not to mention Thomas’s power has a time limit too.

He’s got a point, Hanji said backing Eren up, the time is ticking away and if more guards rush in then we will be caught with our pants down.

Fine, but stay safe. Pixis said and Nanaba seemed to agree with him.

Wow, Eren actually got away with it I was sure we would get caught. This went better than I expected. Then again there’s still another room to go.

“Team A we’re going in,” Eren whispered to us. We all took a deep breath before Eren busted open the door. We went and were met with more guards than expected.

The first few guards to run at us weren’t very bright lunging at us rather than using their guns. They even blocked all the guards behind them from shooting at us too not that I’m complaining.

After they were out of the way Sasha’s doubles shielded us as the guards started to open fire now that their comrades were out of the way. Marco and Jean made quick work of the first few as Marco froze their feet into place Jean melted the ice back into water before sending an electrical current through it knocking them out.

The next few guards were a little more cautious with us and devised a plan giving each other just a few nods. They were going to split us up. At first, I thought their plan ridiculous but then I noticed the more we fought them the more we ended up splitting up in this room. Not good, we can’t be cornered or surrounded or we will probably be caught. I monitored Eren’s thoughts waiting to see if he would call for backup once he noticed we were getting surrounded. Nope, he refused. Not good.

I lost sight of the others for a moment while two guards pinned me against the wall. “We captured a cursed over here,” one of them said as giving me a sickening smile when he thought he had won. He’s enjoying this. Too bad he’s not going to like having the tables turned on him.

“You should have just used your guns,” I mumbled to them.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Do you want to die?” The other man asked me.

“You should look behind you,” I said, trying not to laugh. I could easily have pushed them off of me using my telekinesis but the looks on their face when they realize that they are the ones cornered and not me will be priceless.

They turned their heads to look and instantly let go of me putting their hands above their heads as they stared down each and every single one of my knives floating behind them each aimed and ready to cut them up.

“Shit he’s a blue badge,” they mumbled.

“On your knees,” I said and they didn’t even hesitate before following my order.

“Looking sharp porcupine,” Jean said, walking up next to me and patting me on the shoulder.

“Fuck you Pyro,” I rolled my eyes.

I looked up and saw Eren surrounded in the other corner. Rico came over and paralyzed the two guys I was holding and just as I was about to run over and help Eren all of the guards were pinned to the ceiling.

“Oh shit,” Rico mumbled, “that’s one hell of a power,” she sounded almost impressed.

“He can’t hold that for long,” I mumbled before watching all the guards drop to the floor around him before they could get up. Sasha's doubles had already pinned them and held them down. That was the last of the guards. I can’t believe we actually did it. We took out this whole room by ourselves.

“Toxin we have more over here we need paralyzed,” Eren said when he turned around to face us he had his hands clenched and his wrists pulled up to his chest. I could feel his pain from here. He overdid it.

Team A has cleared the guards in the blue badge prison area, Eren informs the team leaders and they all let out sighs of relief before applauding Eren’s strategy. If only they knew that this all was just on a reckless whim.

I walked up and before I could even say anything to him I heard a voice. I’d know those powers and voices anywhere, I heard a familiar voice echo throughout my head.

Ilsa’s telepathy. Where is she? She has to be in one of these cells. My eyes scanned the room before landing on one of the dimly lit cells in the back of the room. I tapped Eren on the shoulder and had him follow me as we made our way straight to her cell. The others helped to open the other cells in the room. Trying the keys, or just breaking the cell doors. We had to wait for the other teams to get some of these cells open.

We walked up to her cell and I felt my heart break a little. She looked so skinny and fragile her skin was so pale and her cheeks sunken in. They haven’t been feeding her. Her hair was matted and overgrown, her face was bruised and her lip was busted. Her eyes lost the innocent glow they used to have, now they seemed devoid of life altogether.

“Ilsa,” I could barely utter her name without feeling tears sting my eyes.

“Hey guys, long time no see,” she said, giving us a weak smile. “I guess I made the wrong choice,” she sighed, “I knew I should have gone with Pixis, I just never thought that things would turn out like this.”

“Now's not the time for regrets, now is the time to get you the hell out of here,” I said and Eren motioned for me to back up. He also had Ilsa back up.

I watched as he created a gravity field that I could feel tugging at me with how strong it was. It ripped the door right off its hinges and sent it flying into the wall with a loud clang.

“Wow, it seems you’ve gotten a lot better at using your power since I’ve last seen you,” she said walking out of her cell. She nearly tripped over her own two feet as she walked.

I walked up to her and threw her arm over my shoulder as I helped her balance out.

“Sorry it’s been a while since I was allowed to walk around,” she mumbled.

We’ve found Ilsa, Eren’s thoughts echoed in my head before the celebratory cheers from the other team leaders.

We sat her down and got her off her feet. We just hoped there was something Hanji could do to help her, but malnourishment and weakened muscles aren’t things she can just cure. The busted limp and bruises definitely, but that’s about it.

We eventually got all the rest of the cells open as team C and D joined us with all the red and green badge prisoners behind them.

Hanji and Franz got to work. Franz’s power started backlashing and he had to stop, but Hanji kept at it. I could tell she was getting to her limits, but she finished healing the rest of the prisoners so that they could at least walk out of here.

She came up to Ilsa and checked in on her not before giving her a big hug of course. As I feared there was nothing she could do. It appears Ilsa wasn’t the only one in a state like this.

While Hanji finished healing the last few people I heard Thomas in Eren’s head.

“I have to stop using my power sooner than I thought. I guess practice earlier wore me out more than I expected if I keep going it will start to backlash. He let them all know. They all gave him the okay and assured him that it was fine the mission was almost over anyway. All that was left was for us to walk through the portal back home.

After a few more minutes Hanji walked up to Eren and me before calling over Berthold with her. “We are about ready to lead everyone back to the portal,” she told us.

“We have a lot of slow people still, we will stay in the back and protect them,” Eren volunteered, “your team should lead the way,” he told Berthold.

“Alright we will,” he agreed.

“We will be behind team D,” Hanji told Eren.

“Okay sounds good, let’s get everyone moving, the longer we stay here the more dangerous this is,” Eren said and everyone agreed.

Hanji rounded people up. I looked up at Ilsa to see Ymir and Reiner talking with her. Reiner was actually smiling, well I assume he’s smiling since he is radiating happiness just talking to her again, but I can’t really tell with his costume blocking his mouth.

When Berthold told him he would have to part ways with her again he was instantly filled with sadness.

“Don’t worry, we can catch up more after this is all over,” she said before giving him a hug.

“I missed you so much,” he said before letting her go. Team D and C headed to the front of the line and started leading the way down the hallway. We had all the slower people in the back with us so we could make sure they were safe as we all headed down the hall.

Ilsa was hanging back by us as one of Sasha’s doubles was helping her keep her balance. We were talking as we walked Eren and I kept our eyes glued on the door behind us and the door in front of us. This hallway has three doors. The one that we just came from which was the blue badge prison cells. The one where we are going which is around a corner up ahead in the control room. And lastly, a door that leads to the outside. We made sure to watch it the whole time we were walking by.

We had just passed the door that was stressing us all out and we let out a sigh of relief all that was left to do was clear the last bit of this hallway, turn the corner and enter the control room. It was a long time of stress as people slowly made their way through the portal. Then again only so many people can walk through at once. I would say nor more than three, maybe four tops. No wonder it was taking us so long to get through this hallway.

It reminded me of a line for a popular roller coaster. The line was long and seemed never-ending. It was moving, but it felt like you weren’t really getting any closer.

The end finally in sight I felt my body start to relax. Our first camp raid was successful, not only that, but we managed to save our friend.

“You guys were so cool in there,” Ilsa had continued talking. She was talking with Eren and I had completely zoned out. I snapped myself back into the conversation and just listened to her gush over us. “You guys must really have practiced hard. I mean you literally had people on the ceiling and ripped a metal door off its hinges. And you had so many knives floating there, and you two work so well together,” she said looking at Jean and Marco.

“How many clones did you have out? That’s way more than I ever remember you having!” She said to Sasha before looking towards Rico, “I’ve never met you before, but man your power was so cool I don’t even know what you did but people were dropping like flies around you!” She said to Rico.

Rico had a little smile on her face before she leaned over to me and nodded, “I see why you wanted to save her so badly, she is a ray of fucking sunshine. I like her,” she said before patting me on the shoulder.

“The nicest person I know,” I said before hearing a strange sound behind me. A door creaking open? Oh shit! I let my guard down! Before I could even finish turning my head a string of gunshots rang out.


	44. Gunshots

The next part happened so fast despite seeing it in slow motion. I locked eyes with the man shooting into our group of prisoners. Before I could even move Marco had put up a thick ice wall using the last of his water. Sasha’s doubles quickly stood behind it making sure that if any bullet made it through the wall that the doubles would stop it going forward.

I whipped my head back around my ears still ringing from the gunshots. I saw nothing but pure chaos. Everyone was running towards the portal room as fast as they could some were slower than others but the panic was still there. I looked around and saw a few people on the floor. Ilsa was laying right in front of me she was shot in the abdomen I dropped to my knees and tried to stop the bleeding. Eren dropped right next to me to help.

I looked around to make sure our team was okay Sasha had her some doubles help up the wounded and escort them out while one of her doubles picked her off of the ground. She looked like she was shot in the leg. Shit. I looked around through the chaos to find Jean and Marco who were trying to get over to us. I looked up at Rico who was holding pressure on her shoulder. She was shot. I couldn’t even tell if Eren and or I were shot. There was too much adrenaline pumping through us. I looked at him to make sure he was okay.

He was staring down at Ilsa’s wound trying to stop the blood. When Jean and Marco made it to us after fighting through the crowd of people trying to push past Eren begged them to help.

“You have to help, she's bleeding a lot,” he said through a shaky voice.

Jean leaned over and grabbed Eren picking him up, throwing him over his shoulder, “we have to go.” Jean said with a shaky voice. Somethings wrong. My eyes moved up until they landed on Ilsa’s face.

“We have to help her!” Eren screamed out.

“She’s gone,” Rico had said. I couldn’t pull my eyes away from the hole in the middle of her forehead.

I pulled my hands off of her and stood up. My mind was blank and all sound disappeared from my ears. I could barely even see what was happening. All I could see was her blood all over my hands and her body lying there motionless and bloody. This is my fault if I didn’t let my guard down I could have stopped him. I could have-.

I felt a hand grab my arm as some sounds around me started to tune back in. I looked up and saw Marco had grabbed my arm and was pulling me towards the portal room. “My ice shield isn’t going to last much longer, we have to go!” he yelled but it sounded so far away.

The hallway was nearly empty as everyone had turned the corner. All that was left a few bodies lying dead on the floor. There were muffled gunshots behind the wall of ice still ringing out. Eren was screaming and fighting against Jean as Jean carried him to the portal room.

“We have to go back, Hanji can help her!” He argued.

“Hanji can’t bring people back after they’ve died,” he said as we turned the corner heading towards the control room.

We ran in and it looked like the last few people were running through. The last person in the room was Erwin. He was probably there to make sure we all made it.

We’re the last ones get ready to close it!” Marco yelled as we entered the room. After we had all walked through the portal Erwin closed it behind us.

“What happened?” He asked us but the question fell on deaf ears. We didn’t even know what happened. One minute everything’s fine and the next people are dead and injured.

I walked around trying to find the boys to make sure they made it back okay. The more I walked through the people the more injuries I saw. Gunshot wounds? Oh no, what exactly happened. I managed to spot Marco and started to walk towards him. He was in team A with the boys. I walked up and saw blood and a lot of it. Sasha was on the floor bleeding from her leg. Rico was holding her shoulder as blood slipped down her hand.

I looked at Levi who was standing there just staring at his hands that were covered in blood and next to him was Jean and Eren on the floor. Jean was holding Eren in his arms while Eren was hitting Jean with one hand and holding onto him desperately with the other.

Jean looked like he was failing to fight back his tears. Marco’s eyes were glued to the floor as his legs shook under him. Sasha was holding onto her good leg pulling it close to her chest and covering her face. With the way her shoulders shook I could tell she was crying. Rico even seemed upset she was just staring at the ground with a clenched jaw. Before I could even ask what had happened Pixis walked up next to me and I heard him whisper, “where’s Ilsa.”

As much as I’m hoping I’m wrong everything started to make sense. Levi’s thousand-yard stare as he stared at his hands devoid of any emotion, Eren’s hysterical sobbing, everyone so close to tears. Something happened to Ilsa.

“I’ll handle them, you get Hanji she’s got a few more that need healing,” I said before walking up

“Ms. Magnolia,” Pixis called me before I could finish walking up to them, “make sure they know that whatever happened wasn’t their fault,” he said and I gave him a nod. That would be easier said than done. Especially with Eren and Levi, they always end up blaming themselves.

While I was walking up I saw Nanaba run over to Rico. “You’re hurt.”

“It’s just a scratch,” Rico mumbled.

“You’ve been shot.”

“It’s just a flesh wound. I got off easy,” she mumbled.

I ignored the rest of their conversation as I kneeled down next to Eren and Jean. I thought it would be best to start with them since Eren is having a panic attack. Levi, on the other hand, is in shock.

I set my hand on his shoulder. He whipped his head around and instantly started crying out, “mom, we were supposed to save her, we were supposed to get her out of there!”

“I know, I know honey,” I said putting my hand on his cheek, “you tried your best and she knew that.”

I looked at Jean to see if he needed any emotional help at the moment and he shook his head, “let’s get these two to their room and settled down,” he said. I nodded and stood up. Jean helped Eren to his feet and that’s when I noticed a puddle of blood where they were sitting. I looked at both of them and saw that jean was bleeding.

He seemed aware of his injury “I’m fine I was just nicked by a bullet,” nothing that won’t heal on its own after it’s bandaged.

He lifted his shirt and showed me the scrape down his abdomen. There was no bullet hole just a long cut where the bullet nicked his body. It was bleeding a lot. “It looks worse than it is, promise,” he said and I nodded. I believe him.

While we were walking away from the group of people I saw Erwin had already opened a portal and was letting people go through to the refugee hideout. Issa and Keiani had walked up to him and went through. Guess it will just be our two groups here from now on.

He helped Eren walk towards the bathrooms while I put my hand behind Levi’s back and led him there too. He was quiet and staring at the ground. I don’t even think he realized what was going on around him. Marco had followed behind us to help in any way he could.

When we got them into the bathroom Jean cleaned off Eren’s hands while I cleaned off Levi’s. Marco kneeled down and was cleaning off Jean’s wound and was bandaging him up so he wasn’t just dripping blood everywhere.

Eren had stopped crying and was just staring at the ground. I don’t think he had any tears left to cry. They both looked like they had checked out of reality and were stuck in their minds. I gave Jean and Marco a nod and we led them back to their room.

We got them into the room and I knew we had to get them out of their costumes, but they were so checked out of reality I don’t think they could hear us. I helped Levi take off his jacket and shirt before helping him put on a clean one. Jean and Marco helped Eren out of his braces, jacket, and shirt.

They tuned reality enough to change their pants, but other than that they were still pretty out of it. “Thank you, mom,” Levi forced out a whisper.

I placed a kiss on his forehead, “any time baby, you two should get some rest. It’s been a long night.”

He nodded and didn’t say anything more. Eren was actually the one who said something.

“You should go check on the others, especially Reiner. I know they were close. I’m not even sure if they know what happened yet, but when they do they will need you.”

“I’ll go check on them if you two are okay.”

I said and I was met with a long silence before Levi forced out, “we’re going to be okay, maybe not right away, but eventually.”

“You can go, we will stay with them,” Jean said, giving me a nod.

I stood up to leave and before I could head out of the room I heard Eren asked Jean and Marco if they would sleep in there with them tonight. To which they instantly agreed.

I headed out and went to go check on the rest of my kids. I bumped into Ymir on the way to the common area.

“Hey, do you mind if I talk with you for a moment?” I asked. I didn’t know what she knew, and I had to be careful not to drop all this information on her if she didn’t know about Ilsa, but a part of me wondered if she already knew because of her power.

She just gave me a silent nod her eyes had a distant look to them. “I’m assuming you already know?”

“Pixis told all of us after everyone left,” she whispered, “Sasha tried her best to tell us what happened but we couldn’t really understand her through her crying. Rico told us the rest.

“Is she um, around?” I asked.

“Not yet. Sometimes spirits take a while to come around to me sometimes they come right away, and sometimes they never come at all. Not all spirits stick around especially if they don’t have any unfinished business.”

“I see,” I nodded. “I was thinking that maybe if she was around it would give the others some closure,” I shrugged.

“No, it wouldn’t. It’s too soon. Even if she did appear right now she and I both would know that now is not the time to tell anyone. People need time to grieve on their own and having her appear right now could lead to severe denial and no one would have a chance to process and grieve. Some people might even convince themselves that she’s not really gone and that’s detrimental to them mentally.” She sounded like she was speaking from experience. I never thought about it that way.

“That makes a lot of sense.”

“Anyway I’m doing alright, so you can go check in with everyone else, I know Reiner could really use some help right now even if he doesn’t want to admit it to the rest of us.”

“Okay, I’ll make sure to check in with him, but are you sure you’re doing okay?”

“I’m sure, I’ve dealt with a lot of death and dead people, and as much as it hurts to say I’m kind of numb to it. I don’t know if it’s because her death hasn’t hit me yet, or if it’s because I’m holding out hope that she will come to me, but right now I don’t feel anything.”

I pulled her into a hug. I know it just hasn’t hit her yet, and when it does it’s going to hurt, even if she does appear to Ymir just knowing that she’s gone is going to hurt.

I felt her try to keep her breathing under control as she held onto my shirt. I held her close until I felt her hands let go of my shirt. When she let go her eyes were red as she tried to hold back her tears.

“Thank you I needed that,” she said trying to keep her tone as flat and emotionless as possible. It seems that Reiner isn’t the only one who doesn’t want to admit he needs help.

“If you need to talk I’m always here for you,” I said putting a hand on her shoulder. She nodded before walking back towards her room.

I went to check on the rest of the kids starting with Reiner. When I walked into the common area most of the people were crying, a few people were staring emotionless at the ground probably still trying to process what had happened. Others were trying to comfort people.

I looked around for Reiner when I saw Berthold sitting on the ground. I was about to ask him if he knew where he was that’s when I realized that Reiner was crumpled on the floor in front of him motionless, his eyes red and puffy, his hands pulling at his hair as he bit his lip so hard it was dripping blood.

Berthold was trying to comfort him, but Reiner wasn’t listening to anything no words were reaching him. I kneeled down next to them to try and help.


	45. Jean's Outburst

I sat on Eren and Levi’s bed trying my damnedest to stop from just breaking down. Ilsa was a close friend and as heartless as this may sound her death wasn’t what broke me. The thing that broke me the most was seeing Eren reduced to nothing but a sobbing mess on the floor and Levi an emotionless and stiff from shock.

I’m not even sure what happened. All I know was everything was fine and we were about to all be home free and all of a sudden my ears were ringing and everyone was running and shoving. I remember trying to push my way back to the back to get back to where the rest of the team was. Marco and I were swept up by the crowd, but when we managed to get back to the rest of our team I saw Ilsa on the ground with a hole in her forehead. Eren and Levi didn’t even seem to notice since they were still trying to stop her bleeding elsewhere.

My only instinct was to nod to Marco to grab Levi as I ran up and grabbed Eren. I knew I would be able to take his punches better than Marco. I grabbed him and tried to keep us moving towards the portal room without tripping over any of the other bodies that were lying dead on the floor.

The whole scene kept replaying over and over in my mind. She was fine one second and dead the next. I shook my head and blinked a bunch of times to clear the stinging feeling from my eyes as I looked up at Eren Levi and Marco. We were all in our own heads fighting our own battles. Marco was staring at his own lap Levi was still staring at his hands and Eren was curled up in a ball with his head covered, but he wasn’t moving.

Levi and Eren are usually the ones who check in with everyone mentally and are there to listen if mom is away or talking to someone else, but for once they are the ones who need the emotional help the most. I’m not good at this, but I’m the only one who can step up at the moment. Everyone else is busy dealing with their own emotions and grief, but if I just push mine aside and help them through it now then I can grieve later. Who knows helping them might help me too. I don’t know, but I need to do something.

I went to scoot closer to Eren but he stood up and walked away from the bed. Everyone else seemed to be out of it to even notice that he left. He walked over to the wall and before I knew what was happening I watched him punch it as hard as he could.

Fuck fuck fuck. I jumped up and ran over to him. He managed to punch the wall three times before I could pull him away.

He stared me right in the eyes before yelling, “We could have saved her. She didn’t have to die if only I paid more attention. If only I would have just had planned to block off the doors from the start.”

“Blocking the doors from the start wouldn’t have worked. Guards had come through each of the doors a few times through our mission. Team B were the ones to take them out when they went to the control room. If they were blocked they would have sounded the alarms and the hundreds of guards outside would have stormed the place. We would have been caught or worse.

Eren let out a deep breath as his legs shook beneath him. I looked at his hand and even in the dimly lit room, I could tell something was broken. I need to get him to Hanji first thing in the morning. If I try and take him now I don’t think he would go, not to mention I don’t think she can even use her powers with how much she had to sue them earlier.

I led him back over to the bed and sat him down before taking a deep breath and pulling him into a hug. He instantly wrapped his arms around me and just held on tight.

I took a deep breath feeling the tears prick at my eyes again. I blinked a few times before looking towards Levi. I needed to snap him out of his thoughts. I can only imagine the events in his head playing on loop right now and with every loop I knew would come more guilt.

Levi and Eren have always been ones to take things to heart. If something happens they blame themselves even if there wasn’t anything they could possibly do because their mind always comes up with what-if scenarios that no one would ever be able to predict. In those what-if scenarios, there are always other ways to go about things that would have led to different outcomes, but these what-ifs are just that, what-if. An impossible question that brings nothing but guilt and regret.

There’s no point in asking what-if because we will never know if there ever was another our come all that's left now is to process and pick ourselves back up and continue the fight. This is war and war breeds casualties. There have been hundreds, even thousands of casualties, just never one this close to home before.

I took another deep breath to clear my thoughts that got a little off track. I can’t think about that stuff right now all I need to focus on is helping everyone grieve in a healthy way.

I nudged Marco’s knee with my knee and he looked up at me. Can you snap Levi out of it I mouthed to him. He took a deep breath and nodded. I watched as he looked at Levi and then down at his hands where he was still standing. He put his hands in both of Levi’s hands. Levi looked up at him or I guess right through him would be more accurate.

“Staring at your hands isn’t going to bring her back,” Marco said through a shaky voice.

“Her blood is on my hands,” He said plainly. “I could have-.”

“Cut that shit out,” I felt myself say. He seemed to snap out of everything and stared me right in the eyes.

“We are all feeling guilty; we were all tasked with watching that door. We were all distracted and caught up with a premature victory that we let our guard down. So if you are going to sit there and blame yourselves then be fair and blame us too,” I said before being able to control the rage that came out of me. I took a deep breath and snapped for a moment and when I tried to reign it back in it didn’t work.

“So go on then, tell me it’s my fault, tell Marco it’s his fault, tell Eren it’s his fault, go find Sasha and Rico and tell them it’s their fault,” I blurted out. Oh, my god shut up this is not what he needs right now. I yelled at myself mentally.

“No, that's exactly what I needed to hear,” he said, giving me a weak nod.

“It’s not your fault Levi,” Marco said putting a hand on his shoulder, “no one thinks it’s your fault. Hell, I can tell you for a fact everyone is too busy blaming themselves to blame anyone else.”

That’s what I wanted to say, I don’t know why mine came out with rage. I just wanted to reassure him not yell at him.

“It’s fine Jean,” Levi said looking up at me. I guess he’s in my head at the moment. “Everyone grieves differently, and anger is a part of grieving for some people. I know it is for me at least,” He mumbled the last part.

I felt as Eren’s grip on me loosened as he let go with one hand and reached out for Levi. Levi gave him a weak smile and scooted in next to us and he wrapped one arm around Eren and one around me. Levi looked to Marco and gave him a nod, “get over here,” he said and Marco scooted in and wrapped his arms around us.

“Why do I always get stuck in the damn group hugs,” I rolled my eyes and teased. I was hoping to brighten the mood a bit. From my outburst and all the crying, we needed a moment to catch our breaths. I know damn well the tears are far from over, but a few minutes of a calm atmosphere is what everyone needs at the moment.

“You know you secretly love them,” Eren said with a small laugh that seemed to drain his energy.

Eren went dead quiet for a moment and then looked around. “Did one of you just touch my head?” he asked.

“No.” We all answered.

“Someone just did,” he mumbled. “I can’t tell if it’s Ilsa or mom,” he mumbled, closing his eyes. “How do I know who you are?”

Levi’s head shot up and he let out a sigh, “I think it’s your mom, cause Farlan and Isabel just touched me.”

“How can you tell?” I asked. “I feel two sets of hands and it’s usually where Farlan and Isabel touch me to let me know they are here.

“It’s definitely mom, I felt something on my forehead. When I was younger she used to kiss me on the forehead when I was upset.” He said before taking a short pause to think. “Do you think Ymir sent them to make us feel better?” Eren asked.

“No, I think they are here trying to comfort us out of their own free will.” He mumbled. Before whispering out a “thank you guys,” to them.


	46. Pixis

“I heard you were able to gather some information?” I asked.

Gunther looked at Nanaba waiting for her say. “Tell Pixis what you learned,” she nodded.

He looked back at me and nodded. “While integrating some of the guards I learned about the location and some information about two other camps.”

“Should we tell the rest of your team?” Nanaba asked.

“No,” I said quickly. “Not yet. They all need time to grieve. This is their first time losing someone in this war. I can imagine none of them are taking it well.”

“You’d be right,” I heard a voice at my door.

“Ms. Magnolia?” I asked looking up. “You told me to come to you after I finished talking with them.”

“Yes, let me finish up with these two and we can talk,” I nodded before turning back to Nanaba and Gunther.

“I will check in with my team and when they’ve had enough time to process and grieve a little we can then talk to them about the other camps.”

“Won’t it be too late by then?” Gunther asked. “I mean this camp was hard enough not to mention now that we’ve taken one down the rest of them might reinforce their defenses. Especially, after I went asked every guard about the camps.”

“Well, none of the guards you interrogated should remember you interrogating them.” I shrugged.

“That's not how my power works,” he said quickly.

“Not how your power works, but that’s how Hanna’s power works if she overloads a person's mind to a certain point they can forget certain memories. I instructed your team leader to have her follow behind and make them forget.”

“Oh, that’s smart,” he mumbled before shaking his head. “Still, after one is attacked you would think the others would add more defenses.”

“All the more reason to wait a while,” I shrugged.

“I don’t follow,”

“You’re right,” Nanaba nodded realizing what I was saying. “The guards from the last camp would have immediately reported it after catching us there. Meaning that all the other camps will quickly have an increase in guards before we could ever think to strike. So by waiting we are also increasing the chances there will be fewer guards,” She mumbled.

“How?”

“Because with enough time they will think that we didn’t get any information about them and they might start to let their guard down or call back some of the guards after a while,” I explained.

“So you're saying no matter what we are better off waiting on these for a little while no matter what.”

“Exactly.”

They headed back to their rooms but before Nanaba could leave Ms. Magnolia. stopped her. “You might want to check on Rico, she seemed to take the death as hard as the rest of team A.”

“Thank you, I’ll talk to her,” she said, giving her a nod and a grateful smile.

Ms. Magnolia walked in and took a seat. “So how is everyone?” I asked.

“Everyone is so broken.” She said, taking a deep breath. “It breaks my heart to see them all like that.

“How is team A taking it?”

“Exactly how you'd think,” she sighed. “Levi is so paralyzed with guilt that he can’t stop staring at his hands. Eren is in such a state of despair he is bouncing between fits of rage, sobbing, and shock. Jean and Marco are trying to hold back their grief to help Eren and Levi, but they are in an equally bad state. I can tell they feel as guilty as Eren and Levi do. Sasha was a sobbing mess and just kept mumbling about how she turned her back for a split second to check up on some of the other prisoners, and Rico completely shut everything out and went straight to her room.”

“What about Reiner? I know he and Ilsa were close.”

“Reiner was so out of it that he was unresponsive for the first 5 minutes of me trying to talk to him. When he finally realized I was next to him he actually hugged me.”

“He hugged you? Reiner?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh shit,” I mumbled. He is in a horrible state if he hugged someone other than Berthold in public.

“Ymir is also really hurting,” she let out a deep breath as she tried to stop herself from getting overwhelmed with her own emotions.

“She’s torn between grieving and just hoping that Ilsa appears to her. I don’t think she knows how to grieve. She keeps saying that she’s fine and that she’s always around dead people so it doesn’t affect her, but she’s really struggling. I’m afraid that if Ilsa doesn’t show up then Ymir won’t know how to process her death properly.”

“I see,” I nodded. I didn’t even think about Ymir and how hard this must hit her. The way loss hits a person is always different, but for Ymir, it’s so different from the rest of us that I don’t even know how or if I can help her through it.

“And the others,” I asked.

“Different variations of what's already been said. No one is okay, I don’t think you are even okay, though you are trying to act like it. I get strong for their sake, but you don’t have to hide in front of me. I know a broken person when I see one. The look behind your eyes is those of a grieving parent, I of all people should know.”

I felt my throat tighten and let out a deep breath. “Thank you for your concern, but I’m fine,” I said with an unconvincing shaky tone. I took another deep breath to fix it. “You can go,” I said in a monotone voice.

“I don’t think I can,” she said leaning forward, “I’ve talked to everyone, even Shadis, though he didn’t have much to say aside from the fact that he didn’t want to talk. Now it’s your turn.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“You just lost someone you don’t have to be fine. You don’t have to push away your emotions. Don’t be afraid to let them out every once in a while.”

“Do you think I’m heartless?” The question slipped out before I could stop myself.

“Far from it. I think you are really caring and that you try so hard to take care of everyone else that you forget that you are allowed to have emotions and feelings. You are allowed to be sad and angry.”

“But if they see me cry then-.”

“Then nothing,” She cut me off. “If anything they’ll see you cry and will know you truly do care. They aren’t going to judge you. Half of them will probably break down and join you because they know how hard it is to hold in those tears.”

“Thank you, Ms. Magnolia,” I said, through deep breaths as tears stung at my eyes. “But I really do just need to be alone right now,” I said.

She nodded and stood up. She gave me a pat on the shoulder before telling me, “my door is always open if you need to talk.” She walked out of the room and I could only keep my head up for so long.

I laid my head on my desk and just let the tears flow. “Those bastards will pay. Ilsa had her whole life planned out and some trigger happy bastard with a badge destroyed it. The government took away her happy little plan, and they didn’t stop there, they had to take her away too.”

I tried to take a deep breath but I couldn’t find the air. I just sat there silently sobbing with my head on my desk when I heard someone walk into the room. I didn’t even bother to look up. I knew who it was by the footsteps.

“Looks like neither of us were able to hold back our tears this time,” Shadis said with a shaky voice before sitting next to me and wrapping his arms around me.

“She was innocent.” Was all I could mumble.

“They are all innocent,” Shadis reminded me.

“She was too sweet for this cruel bitter world," I couldn't keep anything in any longer and I felt myself start to break down for the first time in years.

“She really was.” He said holding me tightly with one hand and rubbing my back with the other.


	47. Grieving

How did things get like this? She was right there in front of us and they took her away. They killed her in cold blood. I should go back and return the favor.

“Baby?” Berthold said scooting closer to me and putting a hand on my back. “Is there anything I can do before we go to bed.”

I couldn’t find the words. I had so much I wanted to say to him but nothing would come out. I wanted to tell him how much I’m going to miss her, how much I love him, that I don’t want to lose him like we lost her, that I just want him to hold me close. When I finally forced out some words they were the wrong ones. “No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, now leave me alone,” that’s not what I wanted to say. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes shut. I’m taking out my anger on him. All I want to do is hug him and pull him close so why am I being such an asshole to him.

“Reiner?” He sounded so hurt when he called my name. I wanted to roll over and hug him but my body won’t move. I heard him take a deep breath before I felt him get off the bed.

I felt tears sting at my eyes again. I didn’t want him to leave I want him to stay. Why can’t I say anything, why can’t I move I need to stop him. Why am I like this?

I felt the bed dip on the other side and opened my eyes to see his beautiful ones staring at me as he sat next to the bed and laid his head next to mine. “I know you don’t mean that,” he said before bringing a hand up to my cheek and wiping some tears away.

I just closed my eyes tighter and scooted over to make some room on this side of the bed for him. He scooted in next to me and wrapped his arms around me before I felt whatever hold that was on my body vanish. I was able to move again, I was able to speak.

“I love you so much.” I blurted out as I wrapped my arms tightly around him.

Everything kept replaying in my mind. Is there something I could have done differently to prevent this? If I paid more attention to the door maybe she would still be alive. Should I go check in with the rest of team A? They knew her better than I did, but they might be mad at me. What if they blame me for looking away from the door? I mean everyone else knew her, it was guaranteed they would be distracted. I knew it and I still took my eyes off the door. Maybe I should give them some time to grieve before checking in on them. I’ll check in with them in the morning.

I shook my head to try to stop my thoughts from rambling on. I couldn’t get her smile out of my head. I only met her for a moment and we barely spoke, but they were right about her. She was so positive despite looking like she was in so much pain. She gave us the biggest smile and complimented us. She called my power cool, usually, people are afraid of them. Her smile was contagious, and her personality reminds me of a ray of sunshine.

The image of her looking at me and complimenting my powers while smiling so brightly never lasted for more than a moment it was always quickly corrupted by a bullet hole appearing on her forehead and her dead eyes staring into me like they knew it was all my fault. Her kind words were replaced with the sound of gunshots and screaming.

“Hey hun, how are you holding up?” I was quickly pulled from my thoughts as I turned my head to look at Nanaba. She must have finished talking with Pixis already.

“I could have stopped this, I could have stopped all of this.” I heard the words leave my mouth but I don’t remember saying them.

She just froze in place, “Rico, hun. No.” Her words were no more than a whisper. She walked over to me and sat next to me on the bed. I just pulled my knees closer. “This isn’t anyone’s fault but the guard. You guys did your best, and just remember that you saved a lot of people today.” She put a hand on my shoulder and gave me a soft smile.

I just leaned my head over onto her shoulder. “I don’t want them to be mad at me,” I whispered.

“Who?”

“The rest of my team.”

“Why would they be mad at you?”

I closed my eyes and couldn’t force my voice above a whisper. “Because I took my eyes off the door.”

“Hun, no one is blaming you,” she said wrapping her arms around me and rubbing my back. “From what I’ve heard everyone who was in your team is too busy blaming themselves for the same reason.”

“They are?” I asked looking up at her.

She just gave me a sad nod.

“But it’s not their fault,” I said, feeling my voice crack. They shouldn’t have that guilt on their shoulders. The amount of grieve they must be having right now is already too much but guilt will do nothing but hurt them more. “That was their friend. They did everything to try and save her and when they thought she was safe of course they would let their guard down a little that’s expected. I told myself that I wasn’t going to let my guard down because I knew they would and I yet I did it anyway.”

“It’s not your fault Rico. None of this is your fault. Sometimes you can’t save everyone.”

“But I didn’t save her!” I heard my voice raised and I tried to lower it back down. “I saw the gunman before the others did. I saw him a split second before he ever pulled the trigger and you know what I did. Nothing. I froze.” She stayed quiet for a moment and when she was about to say something I shook my head and cut her off, “I could have stopped it.”

“How?” Rico asked her tone was less of a question and more of a statement. “You said a split second before he pulled the trigger. How could you have stopped him? Yelling? That wouldn’t work he would already be pulling the trigger before you can say a single word? Your powers? You wouldn’t have been able to use them at that far of a range without injuring your other teammates.”

I wanted to stay quiet knowing she wouldn’t like my answer to her question, but the words just slipped out. “I could have jumped in front of Ilsa.”

Nanaba went dead silent before she just pulled me close. “That wouldn’t have helped anything,” she said quickly.

“Well, the others wouldn’t be going through hell right now if I had.”

“You don’t know that but for argument sake let's say they wouldn't. I would. Our group would. A death is still a death it still hurts people even if it hurts different people it will still hurt. You might not even realize how many people it does end up hurting. You think the others wouldn’t care? Do you know how many of the other group’s members walked up and asked me to check on you? I’m sure your team would care especially since they trust you enough to include you in their reckless little plan.”

I froze for a moment. “You knew about that?”

“Pixis told me that their group was filled with reckless people and he overheard them talking a few times about some of their reckless plans. I wasn’t on board at first until he explained that it wouldn’t be anything they couldn’t handle since he trusts Eren and Levi to not go so far that they will endanger themselves or others. I was still going to make them take Hitch and Marlowe out of their group when he told me, but he told me a few minutes before they wanted to switch you into their group and I knew you could hold your own so I figured if it was too much you would come to me about it.” She explained.

Well damn, I thought they were just clueless this whole time. “Wait, does that mean Pixis thinks it’s our team’s fault for this?”

“No, he knows the reckless plan was more about running ahead and fighting alone,” she said and I let out a sigh of relief. “No one thinks this is any of your faults.” I just gave her a nod.

“Thanks, Nanaba. Um, can you stay in here tonight?” I asked and she looked a little surprised. “You haven’t asked me that since you were a kid.”

“Well um, I just really don’t want to be alone tonight,” I mumbled.

“Okay, I’ll stay in here, just let me grab some clothes to sleep in first,” She said and I realized she was still in her costume.

“Okay, I actually have to go talk to someone first if that's okay?” I asked.

Alright,” she said before ruffling my hair and heading to her own room to grab some clothes.

My arm was throbbing where I was shot. It still hurt like hell since Hanji was so drained she could only heal it to the bare minimum which was fine. I'm no stranger to pain, but being shot is definitely new. I took a few calming deep breaths and wiped at my eyes a little before heading out of my room. I headed over to the other group's rooms. I stopped in front of Eren and Levi’s room for a moment before shaking my head. I will check on them in the morning.

I was about to keep walking when I heard yelling. “We are all feeling guilty; we were all tasked with watching that door. We were all distracted and caught up with a premature victory that we let our guard down. So if you are going to sit there and blame yourselves then be fair and blame us too,” I heard Jean’s voice. My head turned back towards the room and I froze in place listening. “So go on then, tell me it’s my fault, tell Marco it’s his fault, tell Eren it’s his fault, go find Sasha and Rico and tell them it’s their fault.”

I could hear Levi’s voice but I couldn’t make out what he had said. I leaned in a little closer before hearing Marco. “It’s not your fault Levi, no one thinks it’s your fault. Hell, I can tell you for a fact everyone is too busy blaming themselves to blame anyone else.”

Well, he’s got that right. I took a deep breath and kept walking. Nanaba’s right, but Jean and Marco are also right. We are all too busy blaming ourselves for something that maybe no one could have stopped. We are being hypocrites because we are blaming ourselves but refusing to place blame on anyone else despite them being right next to us. I think it’s because deep down we know that no one is to blame here aside from the person who pulled the trigger.

I stopped walking in front of the door and knocked on the wall. I heard a shaky come in and I did just that. The lantern in the room was turned off and it was hard to see much of anything. The small room was pitch black. “Rico?” I heard him ask just as he flicked on the lantern. He was sitting on the floor next to his bed nearly curled into a ball. I could see the redness in his face and his disheveled hair.

“Hey Molbit,” I gave an awkward wave. “I thought I would come and check up on you,” I said and he gave me a weak smile.

“Thank you but you didn’t have too,” he said, his voice hoarse and shaky.

“I know, but I wanted to,” I said walking over and sitting on the floor next to him. “Do you wanna talk about it?” I asked. I remembered the last time we talked he told me that his worst-case scenario was that people died and how lucky he felt that it hadn’t happened yet.

“I don’t know what to even say.”

“If you want you can tell me about her?” I asked. I’m not really sure how this whole comforting thing works.

“She was such an angel.” I heard him whisper.

“I only met her for a moment but she seemed really nice.”

“The nicest,” he said with a small smile. “She would always go around making sure everyone knew that they were loved. She would try and make friends with anyone who seemed lonely. Well, that’s how it started, then it turned into making friends with everyone. Part of her powers was that she had perfect memory recall so she would never forget about anything or anyone. Every morning she would greet everyone even bringing people their favorite flowers or a balloon of their favorite color if they were feeling down the day before.”

“Wow, she sounded like an amazing person.”

“The best.” He said, taking a deep breath, “she would eat lunch in my office every Monday after overhearing me tell Hanji how depressed I had been. We would talk about little things, she would tell me about her day and ask me about mine. Over time she ended up telling me all of her plans for the future and I was so excited to help her achieve her goals. He paused for a moment before letting out a shaky breath and closing his eyes, “but I guess that will never happen now.”

“What were some of her goals?” I asked hoping to pull him to a more positive note.

“She wanted to become a journalist and later an author. She loved sharing facts and other things she learned as well as telling stories. She had a book already in the making last time we spoke,” He paused a moment to think, “Which was over three years ago now. I wonder if she ever finished it.”

“I’m sure she did.”

“I hope so,” he sighed, “it would be nice if she completed at least one of her goals.”

I took a deep breath and knocked on the wall. Come in, he said. I walked in and I looked fine, but mentally I couldn’t focus, my thoughts were all over the place and my emotions were nonexistent. I was just numb like I was a walking shell. Nothing inside just a cold emptiness. I couldn’t tell if it was because I was drained from today or just haven’t fully processed what happened. There was one thing I was sure off and it’s that things were just going to get worse before they got better.

He had jumped up and had a hand covering most of his eyes. “Oh it’s just you,” he said letting out a sigh of relief as he dropped his hand and plopped back down on the side of his bed.

He patted the bed next to him, “come take a seat Hanji.” I walked over and plopped down next to him. “What’s on your mind?”

I could tell he had been crying. I on the other hand couldn’t. Almost everyone was crying and as much as I wanted to break down and cry for her and feel something, anything, I couldn’t.

“What’s wrong with me?” I asked quietly. “I cared about her, I really did, but for some reason, I don’t feel anything.”

“It probably hasn’t hit you yet. It didn’t hit me until a few minutes ago,” he sighed. “Once you’ve been alone with your thoughts everything just seems to fall apart.”

“It looks like it hit you hard?” I asked. He just nodded.

I laid my head on his shoulder. “I’m here to listen,” I said.

“No,” he mumbled, “no talking. Not tonight. I just want to go to bed and forget even if it’s just for a few hours. I know it’s going to hit me harder in the morning, but I don’t care, I can’t take any more of this.” His voice cracked as he tried to fight back another wave of tears.

“Okay,” I picked my head up off of his shoulder, “I should let you get some rest,” I started to get up when he grabbed my wrist.

“Are you sure you’re okay. Just because I don’t want to talk doesn’t mean I can’t listen if you want too.”

I just paused for a moment. “I don’t want to talk. I don’t know what to even say right now since nothing's hit.”

“Well, you had a reason for coming in here so what is it?” he asked and I just froze as I tried to think. Why did I come here?

“I came to check on you,” I said but even I wasn’t sure if that was the reason or not.

“You don’t sound very sure about that.”

“I mean that was part of the reason I came in here, but I don’t know why else I came in here.” When bad things happen I’m just used to going to the same people. Usually, Molbit or Erwin are my go-to but when I went to check on Molbit I saw Rico walk into his room so by instinct I just came here. I mean I had planned on checking in on both of them, but I know I had another reason for talking to Erwin.

“Well are you going to be okay tonight?” he asked and I snapped out of my thoughts.

I could feel as everything crashed in around me yet I still felt nothing. I could almost feel the tears behind my eyes but there was no sign that any would spill out. “No,” I said plainly. I seem fine now, but I don’t know how long this will last, and by the way that things keep hitting me in small waves I don’t think it’s going to last much longer.

“Stay in here then,” he said and I just looked at him for a moment. “I don’t really want to be alone either. That’s when everything hits me the most.” I just nodded and scooted into the bed next to him and we both laid down. I tried to close my eyes and just go to sleep.

I felt him lay down next to me and after several minutes passed I could have sworn Erwin was asleep by now with how quiet the room has been for a while.

He was right the second I was left alone with my thoughts everything rushed me. I felt my body tremble as I could no longer hold back the silent sobs that I didn’t even realize I was suppressing until now. I felt arms wrap around me as Erwin mumbled, “It’s okay, I know Hanji. I know.”

I just held him close and cried in his arms. I’m glad I stayed there was no way I would be able to do this alone.


	48. Dinner

I opened my eyes and took a deep breath. I didn’t even remember falling asleep. I blinked a few times, my eyes still heavy and swollen. I could barely see despite my eyes being open as wide as they could be. I felt like shit. My head was pounding and my hand was throbbing. I went to move it and I felt a pain shoot all the way up my arm as I winced trying to stop myself from yelling. I took a few deep breaths before trying to sit up. I couldn’t, I didn't have enough energy. It felt like there was a huge weight sitting on me.

Wait a minute there is extra weight, but it’s not the reason I can’t get up. I looked around and counted how many arms. One two, okay those are mine, Three four, those are Levi’s. Five. What the hell. I looked over and saw Jean and Marco. Oh, that’s right, I asked them to stay in here with us.

Levi’s arms were wrapped tightly around me and he was still sound asleep. The other arm around me was Jean’s. He had one arm wrapped around me and one wrapped around Marco. I wouldn’t be able to move even if I did have enough energy. I would wake everyone up trying. I felt Jean move a little and I turned my head back to look at him and his eyes were open. They looked as swollen as mine. “Eren, you awake?” he asked in a quiet whisper. He was looking right at me but I wonder if his vision was as blurry as mine.

“Yeah,” I whispered back.

“Is anyone else away?” He asked and when we were met with silence we realized they were still sleeping.

“Guess not,” I mumbled.

“Shit, my arms are cramping up,” he whispered. One arm was under Marco and wrapped around him and the other was under me wrapped around me. Marco was asleep so he couldn’t move that arm. He couldn’t move the arm under me without me moving which would wake Levi.

“I think we are stuck,” I whispered back.

“Seems so,” he let out a sigh. “Well anyway, how are you doing?” How’s your hand?”

“I feel like shit and so does my hand,” I mumbled.

“Sounds about right. When these two finally wake up I’m taking you to Hanji.” He said and I rolled my eyes.

“I don’t need Hanji to fix my hand,” I mumbled quickly.

“We aren’t just going to leave it broken.”

“Why not?” I raised my voice slightly. I quickly stopped talking when I felt Levi move a little.

“Because it’s hurting you.”

“Maybe I like the pain. Maybe the physical pain takes my mind off the mental pain. Maybe just maybe I hurt myself on purpose.” I said my voice going quieter until I just stopped talking. I didn’t even know what I was saying it just came out.

“Eren,” Jean mumbled but he was cut off by Levi who woke up.

“Are you guys awake?” he asked sitting up.

“Yes,” I mumbled sitting up with him letting Jean’s arm free.

“Oh thank god,” Jean said, moving his arm and stretching it out.

I looked at Levi and I saw everything hit him at once. He quickly zoned out and stared down out the blankets for a minute as he remembered what happened the night before. He took a few deep breaths before snapping out of it and looked up at me.

“I’m okay,” he whispered and I realized that in my head I was worried about him.

I just leaned my head over on his shoulder and took a deep breath. “You don’t have to be,” I whispered, “because I know I’m not.”

He just wrapped his arms around me and gave me a kiss on the forehead. “I’m not either, but maybe if I say it enough I’ll start to believe it.” He whispered in my ear.

I felt as Jean sat up behind me and I turned around and saw that Marco had woken up. We just sat in the bed for most of the day. Half the time we were dead silent the other half was spent talking or crying. None of us felt like eating when mom came in around lunchtime and asked. It’s now almost dinner time and I could tell we wouldn’t get away with that again. If I know mom I know she won’t let us skip another meal.

“I wonder how many of the others didn’t eat either,” Levi mumbled.

Still caring about others before yourself. I thought to him giving him a soft smile. 

“Someone has to look out for them,” he whispered.

Sure enough not even an hour later mom came knocking at the door. “Dinner time,” she said. Before we could even try and shoo her away she glared at us. “And this time I’m not asking.” We all let out some frustrated sighs. “If you’re not out in 10 minutes I will drag each and every single one of you to the dining hall by your ears,” she threatened.

“Noted, we’ll be there,” Levi said covering his ears. She gave a nod and left.

“That fear in your voice sounded like she’s done it before?”

“Only once, but it was enough. Never again.” he shook his head.

“Well you heard her,” Jean said standing up. Just doing that looked like it drained all of his energy.

We all got up and walked to the dining hall. Everyone was here, even though most if not all of them looked like they didn’t want to be. Which makes me wonder if mom gave them all the same warning.

We grabbed the bare minimum amount of food and took a seat at a table. Rico joined us almost instantly. “Hey,” she said awkwardly, “I wanted to check in with you guys earlier, but when I didn’t see you I assumed you weren’t in a mood to talk.”

Well, she was right about that we could barely get some words out to each other let alone full sentence.

“Being completely honest none of us are doing okay,” Levi mumbled.

“I figured,” she sighed, “do you guys want to talk about anything because I’m here to listen,” she said and I felt as Levi’s emotions ran through me… anger. What the hell?

“Stop that,” he said through clenched teeth. Everyone's eyes shot up to see what the hell he was thinking.

Rico was just staring back at him like a deer in headlights. “Stop what?” She asked quickly.

“Those thoughts of yours. You really think that would make things better. Like hell it would,” Levi said trying to calm down. “Everyone here would be equally as upset if you were the one who died,” he said and I realized what was happening.

I mean we’ve all had those thoughts, what if it were me what if they killed me instead but that was last night when Levi wasn’t paying attention. I guess today he is paying attention.

“But you don’t know me like you knew her and if-,” Rico was cut off.

“Stop. I don’t care. Whether you realized it or not the second your team stepped foot in this building was the second you guys because part of the family whether we know a lot about you or not you are family.”

She stayed quiet and just stared at him almost in disbelief. She just slowly laid her head down on the table. Levi took a deep breath and patted me on the back before getting up and sitting next to her. He put his hand on her back and started rubbing it. “It’s okay,” he said and I just smiled. Levi’s hurting so bad right now, but he’s still taking his time taking care of others even if he doesn’t have enough energy to do so. That’s the man I’m going to marry one day.

I watched him look up and look me in the eyes before giving me a weak wink to let me know he heard what I was thinking.

I watched as Mikasa, Annie, and Armin came in and they headed over and took a seat next to us. Armin was… smiling… why?

“Good evening everyone,” Armin said, greeting us all with a hug. Something’s not adding up. I locked eyes with Levi to see if he knew what the fuck was happening.

“He’s trying to be overly positive so he doesn’t break down,” Levi mouthed to me. Okay, that makes more sense. Annie on the other hand was acting normal aside from the fact she wouldn’t raise her eyes above ground level. Mikasa on the other hand looked so out of it and she was dead silent. She would be walking into things if Annie didn’t lead her around. She led her over to the table and Mikasa sat down. She looked like she was running on autopilot with some assistance from Annie.

Sasha and Connie came up and sat at the other end of the table, their usual bubbly attitudes gone and replaced with just despair and silence. No one is their usual selves, then again did I really expect them to be.


	49. Lightening the Mood

Everyone was slow about eating probably since none of us wanted to eat, to begin with. As much as I tried to control my power it was a lot harder than I thought it was going to be. Last night it’s almost like my power completely stopped working, but today it’s been so much worse. I’m reading almost everyone's minds as my power keeps jumping from person to person sometimes multiple people at once. I can tell I’m not the only one struggling with emotionally based powers.

I could feel the weight on Eren’s shoulders that his power was putting on him, and I could tell whenever Armin had a bad thought or feeling even without my powers focusing on him. He would drop his fork as it phased through his fingers or he would start going transparent for a quick second. Even Annie’s powers were acting up. She kept one hand under the table since it had fully crystallized after clenching her fist so tightly it broke the skin.

I took a deep breath before my powers snapped to a different person. I feel bad that I’m not as affected about this as everyone else. Like sure I’m sad and upset about Ilsa’s death but I feel like I should be more upset. Maybe it’s because I didn’t know her very well. I mean I’ve never even met her before, but a part of me still wishes I was more tor up about her death because it is sad. I just wish I got to know her better.

I looked up at a nearby table and realized it was Hanna’s thought I was hearing. My power snapped to Franz and Mina who were at the table with her and their thoughts were pretty much the same. That’s right they never even met Ilsa since she was in the upper classes while they were still in the high school classes.

I felt my thoughts snap to a different person and instantly I was flooded with happy memories of Ilsa. It took me a moment to realize it was Chrisra’s thoughts I was reading. I took a deep breath and tried to pull my powers back in to focus on Eren. They ended up focusing on Jean for some reason. Stupid powers. I tried to focus on Eren but they wouldn’t budge.

Jean’s thoughts were pretty empty at first, mostly he was just paying attention to what was happening in the room until I saw his thoughts go to an image of Ilsa laying dead on the floor. It was only there for a second before he forced it away taking a deep breath. He looked over at Eren and nudged him.

“We need to get Hanji to look at your hand,” he whispered to him, “and I don’t care what you say we are getting it fixed.” Eren just shook his head and before he could protest I heard Jean’s words echo through my head. “Don’t make me tell Levi. I don’t think he’s noticed yet.”

His hand? What happened to his hand. I tried to think back to last night to remember but I was so out of touch with reality I can barely remember talking to mom but everything else is just a giant blur. I hadn’t noticed anything wrong with it but now that they mention it he has been heaping his hand out of my sight all day. Even now he’s using the wrong hand to hold his fork while his dominant hand is hiding under the table.

I stayed focused on Jean's thoughts and saw exactly what I missed last night. As I was blacked out of my mind from shock Eren punched the wall. I never even noticed. I’m the shittiest boyfriend ever.

“Please don’t,” Eren whispered back to Jean. Finally, my powers snapped to Eren’s thoughts.

Levi doesn’t need the extra stress he’s barely holding it together himself the last thing I need is him to worry about me. I mean as it is he’s trying to take care of everyone I don’t want to add any more to his plate. Eren turned his head to look at me and we locked eyes before I could avert my eyes.

His mouth opened and then closed again before I heard his thoughts ask me, how long have you been reading my thoughts.

“Long enough,” I mumbled back. I stood up and walked back over to sit next to Eren who had lowered his eyes staring at the floor.

I didn’t bother bringing up anything he had thought about. Now isn’t the time for that not in front of everyone. “We really should get your hand checked out.” Eren just gave me a silent nod.

“Oh so you agree to him without a fight,” Jean mumbled under his breath.

“Because he loves me,” I said wrapping my arms around Eren and placing a kiss on his cheek.

“Oh and he doesn’t love me,” Jean said pretending to get offended.

“Nope,” Eren said back looking him dead in the eyes.

Jean let out a dramatic gasp, “how dare you,” he said placing a hand on his chest.

“It’s okay because I love you,” Marco said giving Jean a kiss on the cheek.

“It’s not the same,” Jean said dramatically before whispering to Marco, “it’s so much better but I want to keep this going for a little bit it’s lightening the mood.”

He’s right it was lightening the mood. Even Mikasa had tuned into reality to watch Jean’s dramatic ass put on a show. I even saw a small smile on Sasha’s face.

Well if it’s making everyone feel better maybe I can join in and help. I thought before looking at Jean, “if I tell you I love you will you take a chill pill.”

“No because you don’t mean it,” Jean said dramatically.

“But I do,” I said and he looked me in the eyes.

“Really?”

“Yes I really love you,” I said before cracking a smile,” not a lot though.”

Jean opened his mouth really wide in shock, “I knew it. I’m so unloved,” Jean said, putting a dramatic hand to his forehead.

“Fine,” Eren rolled his eyes before leaning over and placing a kiss on Jean’s cheek, “I love you you dumbass,” he said playfully.

Jean tried to hold back his laughter neither of us were expecting Eren to actually play along. We heard a few others snicker too.

“Finally someone who actually loves me,” Jean said dramatically hugging Eren who just rolled his eyes.

“You guys are so gay,” Rico laughed, “it’s great,” she said after realizing she said it out loud.

After everyone finished eating they all went to their own rooms while Eren and I went to Hanji’s so she could fix his hand. When we showed her why we were there I could tell she wanted to lecture Eren that he shouldn’t punch walls, but she stayed quiet. She knew we were all struggling with Ilsa’s death. There were bound to be a few outbursts whether it’s rage or violence grieve looks different for everyone.

After Hanji healed his broken hand we headed back to our room in an awkward silence. When we made it inside our room Eren finally spoke up. “I really don’t want you to worry about me. You have enough on your plate and the last thing you need is to focus on me. I mean I know you want to worry about me but you need to focus on yourself right now. I know neither of us are taking it well and yeah we can help each other out but I don’t want either of us to ignore our own feelings. Okay?”

“That’s fair,” I nodded before sitting down on the bed and waiting for him to come over and sit next to me. He leaned his head on my shoulder and took a deep breath.

“Today wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be,” he mumbled.

“Jean’s mostly to thank for that,” I said, wrapping my arms around him.

“Yeah, it’s funny he likes to say he’s not good at emotions but he’s really good at bringing out the positive emotions in people, well, when he wants to.”

We stayed there in a comfortable silence just sitting there until I finally said, “I love you. I can’t wait for the day that I can make you my husband.”

Eren just gave me a big smile before whispering “Me either.”

As the days turned to weeks everyone was able to process their grief better. Everyone seemed to be back to a better state of mind. A few of them were still struggling a little but for the most part, everyone was able to bring themselves back from there grief. Some of them were desperate for another mission. Using their grief as a reminder of why we fight. They don’t want anyone else to die like Ilsa. Instead, they want to go out and save more people and bring them home safely.

“After watching them and evaluating I think it’s time to tell them that we know where some of the camps are,” I said to Nanaba and Shadis.

“Do you think it’s been long enough that the camps have started to let their guards down?” Nanaba asked.

“It’s been a little over three weeks now. They probably will assume that if we haven’t attacked by now that we aren’t going to attack at all. They probably think that we didn’t get the information about the other camps.”

“I’m not sure about this Pixis. Do you really think they’re ready? I mean knowing some of them they will be even more reckless,” Shadis said.

“I’m well aware and I will keep an eye out for any reckless behavior, but as for now I think everything will be fine,” I reassured him.

“Any other concerns?” I asked and they both seemed okay with it. “So it’s settled then? We will call a family meeting and tell them in the morning,” I told both of them and they both nodded.


	50. Two Camps

It’s been almost a month now and nothing feels the same. Honestly, I don’t think it ever will. There’s a heaviness that lingers in the air now. No one brings it up, but we all feel it. We’ve lost people separately before, but this was the first time as a group we had ever lost someone.

We all dealt with it in different ways. After a while, some of us wanted revenge, some of us just wanted to continue the fight, and some wanted nothing more to do with the fight.

One thing was for sure it woke us all up to the possibility that we could actually die. We all knew it was possible, but it felt almost as if together we were untouchable. Her death made us face our mortality. We aren’t all invincible together or alone. We will all die one day and for some of us, that day maybe sooner than later.

This is war and war kills indiscriminately. How many others will we have to lose before we have victory? How many bodies will we have to climb over to get to the end goal? How much heavier will the air get?

“Baby,” I heard Levi’s soft voice call my name as a pair of arms wrapped around my waist. “Pixis called a family meeting.”

“I didn’t even hear you come in,” I mumbled. I took a deep breath and gave him a smile, “okay, let’s go see what he wants.”

He gave me a smile back before placing a kiss on my cheek. We walked up to the meeting room in silence. I’m sure he heard my thoughts from before, but he didn’t pry instead he just held my hand a little tighter as we walked in the room and took our seats.

While everyone took their seats I felt myself fall back into my thoughts. I wonder why they are calling a meeting all of a sudden. Maybe Molbit or Auruo was able to get more information? Maybe it’s about what happened at the last mission? Are they just checking in on everyone's mental state cause if that’s the case then this is all a big waste of time.

Pixis waited until everyone was seated in the room before he called Gunther up to the front. Levi just nudged me before leaning in my ear and whispering, “Eren remember how you told me you wanted to go on more missions when they were available?” he asked and I nodded. “Well, then you might want to get out of your head and listen up.”

A new mission. Wait what did I miss? As far as I know, we don’t have any new information.

“Well think again,” Levi said sounding a little frustrated, “apparently Pixis has known this information all along,” he said crossing his arms.

“Wait, I thought you couldn’t read his mind?”

“It’s not his mind I’m reading. I was looking at Gunther’s. Apparently, after the last mission, he told Pixis about two more camps and Pixis told him not to tell anyone about it.”

“They’ve known this whole time,” I said, slightly raising my voice. It was just over a whisper but it earned an annoyed nudge from Levi and a confused look from Jean and Marco who were sitting next to us.

“Apparently,” He said, letting out a frustrated sigh before closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. I felt his frustration disappear before he opened his eyes, “they were just making sure that everyone had time to grieve,” he said with a little more of an understanding tone.

“That’s bullshit. They should have told us.”

“Even if they did we would have had to wait this long to act anyways.”

“Yeah, and why is that?”

“Because after the last mission guards increased everywhere, they were waiting for them to lower the number of guards before we could act.”

I took a deep breath, “well at least they had a reason for it,” I mumbled.

If they waited with the only reason being we needed time to grieve I would have punched Pixis in his face. It’s not fair to the people locked inside the camp, but then again they had a point to wait out the guards. There were several at the last camp and we only actually interacted with about half of them and that was before the reinforcements were sent in. I could only imagine how many there must have been sent to the other camps after we raided the first one.

Gunther started talking and he told us all how he got information about two camps. He explained what he knew about them to us. One of them was smaller than the other one we had raided but has a heavier guard presence since it only contains blue badge prisoners, the other camp is bigger but has fewer guards since it only contains red and green badge prisoners.

He told us one of them was in the middle of the desert whereas the other was in the mountains. They seem to have a pattern of having these camps in secluded areas. Makes sense they don’t want anyone asking any questions, or even finding them.

Pixis stepped forward to speak and I could see the anger burning in some people's eyes. They were probably as mad as I was finding out that they knew this information this whole time.

“I understand that you are probably angry at me for withholding this information from you,” he said looking directly at Reiner who looked like he was murdering him in his mind, “but I had a reason. After our last mission, it was guaranteed that they would reinforce the guards everywhere. We had to wait for them to think they were clear before attacking. We also needed to track down where exactly these camps were since we were going off rough estimates. Without an exact location, we wouldn’t be able to locate the camps. Now that we have that information and it’s been a while we are hoping that the number of guards has decreased. We want to send in some recon teams to see if it’s safe to raid these camps,” Pixis explained.

“Any questions?” he asked and I felt my hand shoot up without a thought. Looking around I wasn’t the only one. I wonder if we all had the same question.

“Eren,” Pixis called on me. I stood up and felt the words spill out of my mouth.

“Does that mean we are going to have to choose which camp and then wait another month or two before raiding the next one?” I asked. I saw some of the other hands go down it seems they were thinking the same thing.

“I’m glad you asked, no. We are planning on raiding the camps at the same time.” More hands shot up.

“Sasha?” He called next

“What if they haven’t decreased the number of guards.”

“We will know more with the recon mission,” Pixis said before taking a breath, “but depending on the information we collect we will plan accordingly. We will have tons of time to prepare. Unlike last time the more time we take to prepare the less the guards will be expecting us.”

“Ymir?”

“What if we run into the same, um, issue, as last time,”

“We were rushing last time so we weren’t able to come up with a concrete plan this time we will work around every possible outcome,” he said looking at me with a smile. I felt my shoulders drop.

“What was that?” I whispered to Levi.

“I think that means he wants your help planning the mission again.”

“But last time-,” he cut me off.

“Wasn’t your fault,” he said before placing a hand on mine, “like he said we were rushing and didn’t have time to work everything out.”

“You’re right,” I said, taking a deep breath. After talking with the rest of my team a few times we’ve all decided that none of us are to blame and that if any of us blame ourselves then we have to blame each other as well. None of us wanted to blame the other so we all tried our best to get out of the mindset of blaming ourselves.

It took us a while to get to this point, and even now sometimes we all need a reminder when we start slipping back into that mindset. Now it’s one thing to just say that we aren’t to blame, but it’s another to start believing it, and with the help of the others I know I as well as them have started to actually believe it.


	51. Recon Mission Talk

After the family meeting, everyone left the room, but Levi and I stayed behind to see if Pixis actually wanted my help or if I was just imagining it earlier. After the last few people left Pixis gestured for us to follow him as he followed Shadis and Nanaba out of the room. We followed him down to the meeting room. Levi and I took a seat and across from us Pixis, Shadis, and Nanaba sat down.

“So after hearing a little about the layout, what’s your thoughts?” Pixis asked.

I just froze up. “I don’t know,” I mumbled. The last time I made a plan it didn’t end as expected. The ideas in my head are spiraling. I can’t get a coherent plan together without trying to overthink it. Each plan is not even half thought out before another one pops into my head.

“Stop panicking,” Levi whispered in my ear, “your plans are amazing. Overthinking won’t help anything.”

He placed a hand on mine and I felt a wave of calm rush over me as he used his power. My thoughts slowly stopped spiraling until they were coming through clearer.

“It’s okay I know we are asking a lot of you,” Pixis said with an understanding tone.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I gave myself a moment to think first before nodding and opening my eyes again. “Okay,” I said looking up at Pixis, “I know we were planning on raiding both camps at the same time, but are you planning on having the recon missions at the same time too?”

“No, recon missions will be done separately. I figured it would be easier to do those separately and that both groups would need Erwin to get in and out,” he answered. That makes sense. God, I’m asking stupid questions.

“I had the same question,” Levi said to Pixis but made sure to look me in the eyes to let me know that my question wasn’t stupid. I could practically tell what he was thinking. He was telling me to stop beating myself up over little things.

“Well, I need to know more about the camps before I can think up a plan that could help.”

Pixis just nodded and pulled out some notes. “We got as much information as we could, hopeful it’s enough.” He looked through his notes before looking back up at me. “The Mountain camp has cliffs and forests nearby, so there’s some cover for the recon team. The desert camp might be a little harder to find cover since the only cover if you can even call it that, are cactus, dead bush, other various small plants, and maybe a boulder or a ditch.”

“I think we can make it work. We would just need a smaller team to go in. The fewer people for that mission the better.”

“Alright, which recon mission should we plan first?” Nanaba asked.

“Well, we should plan the desert one last. It requires a smaller team, but more planning,” I said.

“So mountain recon mission it is,” Levi finished.

“So who are you thinking?” Pixis asked. I felt another rush of panic run over me and I could tell Pixis saw it. He quickly added, “We’re just spitballing ideas, nothing permanent, just brainstorming.”

I nodded and took a deep breath to calm down. “Okay,” I breathed, “well, we need to figure out whose powers would work best for recon in that environment. However, we definitely need Erwin for sure.”

“Yeah, Erwin is guaranteed for both teams,” Pixis nodded.

“I know Armin and Ymir will probably be added to each team because their powers are best suited for gathering information,” Levi added.

“Yeah, so basically all we have to figure out is whose powers are best suited to protect and keep the team safe while they gather information.”

“Basically,” Pixis nodded.

“And who can help defend them long enough if shit goes sideways,” Shadis added.

“Not helping,” I heard Pixis mumble giving Shadis a glare.

“Last time our powers were the best fit because of the cover the trees provided for our powers, but the desert mission doesn’t fit our powers very well so I think it would be best if we stayed behind on that one,” Levi suggested.

“Yeah, I think we would have better luck helping with the mountain mission,” I added.

“Makes sense,” Pixis nodded, “both of your powers would easily work with the cover provided in that environment.”

I took a moment to think about who else we could have on the team to either gather information or help cover our teammates. “I think Hanji’s power could also work well with the mountain recon mission.”

“Oh yeah that’s good, she can help provide cover really easily,” Levi agreed.

“Okay, so our brainstorm for that team so far is, Both of you, Hanji, Erwin, Armin, and Ymir,” Pixis said looking down at his notes.

“Maybe we could also add Marlowe?” Levi asked.

“And Thomas?” I added.

Everyone looked to Nanaba for her okay since they are her team. “If they agree to it it’s fine with me, just make sure to keep an eye on them.”

“Okay, so, for now, we will leave it at that and come back to it when we get to the planning stage, we can still switch people around if it doesn’t work out, but that’s just our outline for the moment,” Pixis said, trying desperately not to stress me out. He didn’t want anything to sound finalized because he wasn’t sure how I was going to act, and honestly, I wasn’t sure how I would act either.

“Okay so for the desert mission any ideas?” Nanaba asked.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes letting myself think about everyone's powers and how they could work in this situation. Limited cover means a smaller team, and this environment isn’t fit for Levi and my powers, but as it stands right now we have 3 people who are for sure on the team. Ymir, Armin, and Erwin. With all three of them doing recon no one is left to defend them which means we would have to have someone else to protect them. However, everyone else's power would stick out like a sore thumb without cover. Hell as it is they will be out in the open… Unless…

I opened my eyes and opened my mouth to speak. I closed it again as my eyes fell down to the table. That’s a stupid idea it would never work.

“I think it works perfectly,” Levi said putting a hand on my back, “go on tell them,” he whispered.

I took a deep breath and kept my eyes glued to the table. “Well, I know we were supposed to keep the team small because of limited cover, but I think I actually found a way around that. I’m not sure if it would work or not though.”

“Well, let’s hear it, remember we’re just spitballing ideas,” Pixis said.

“You mean he’s just spitballing ideas,” Nanaba corrected, “I don’t think we’ve been much help so far.

“Hey we make good moral support,” Pixis shrugged. “Well most of us,” He said before side-eyeing Shadis.

“Hey, I’m trying my best,” Shadis mumbled.

“Ahem,” Levi cleared his throat.

“Sorry,” Nanaba said quickly, “please continue.”

“Um, well, as I was saying, I think I found a way around the cover issue, as well as the small team issue.”

“We’re all ears,” Pixis said, wanting me to continue.

“Well, I was thinking about everyone's powers and I was realizing that there is one person who could provide the team cover. It’s a longshot though.”

“I think it will work, the hardest part will be convincing her to actually go on a mission,” Levi mumbled.

We got confused looks from the others before I let out a nervous sigh and continued my explanation, “Well I was thinking that we wouldn’t need to find cover if we could easily make cover,” I said before taking a deep breath, “and the only person with a power that could do that is Petra.”

“Oh no,” Pixis mumble.

“That’s going to take a hell of a lot of convincing,” Shadis sighed.

“What why?” Nanaba asked.

“Petra is a pacifist,” Shadis explained, “she helps us out here but missions are usually a no go.”

“Maybe we will be able to talk her into it,” Pixis said thinking out loud, “her only problem with missions is usually the violence, but in a recon mission there usually isn’t any violence.”

“It actually helps minimize the violence in a way. It stops us from going in guns blazing,” Levi added.

“Well, let’s just make two plans for that mission plan A if she agrees and plan B if she doesn’t.”

“Okay makes sense,” I nodded.

“How would she go about making cover though?” Pixis asked.

“Well, I was thinking that she could do what she does here when we have a drill. Instead of walls, it would be the floor. She could turn part of the ground into gas particles Levi can move them over the top of the team and the team could be safely hidden underground with a few holes to breathe, of course, while the rest of the team does recon.”

Pixis nodded and looked up at me, “that’s genius!”

“So what would the team look like if she agreed?” Shadis asked.

“Well, Ymir, Armin, Erwin, Petra, and Levi. Those are who I have so far. We should probably add Marlowe too, they will need to know when it’s safe to come and go and when guards are passing by there cover,” I said.

“Sounds like a plan.”

“Eren comes too,” Levi said quickly.

“But my power doesn’t fit for this mission,” I mumbled.

“I don’t care, I’m not going unless you go,” he said and I looked at Pixis with an embarrassed look. Usually, when Levi and I go on missions we try to go together in case it’s our last, however, recon missions never used to bother us if we were split up.

“Besides, we could use your quick thinking, not to mention your power would be handy in case shit did go sideways,” Levi said and I could tell he was grasping at straws.

“I mean, if Eren wants to go he can,” Pixis shrugged. “The team doesn’t have to be super small anymore now that you solved that issue, and I think he’s right. They will need your quick thinking especially since this is a higher risk mission.”

“Okay, it seems I’ve been outvoted,” I mumbled giving Levi a nod.

“Alright, now if Petra says no?” Shadis asked.

“Well if she says no then we have to stick with Erwin, Armin, Ymir, and one other person.”

“Why do we need one more person?” Shadis asked.

“Because all three of them will be doing recon and no one would be able to watch Ymir and Erwin’s bodies. Ymir will have to concentrate as the spirits zap her energy and Erwin will be unconscious while he’s in astral projection,” I explained.

The room fell silent for a minute before Pixis asked, “Well anyone have any ideas?”

“Eren does,” Levi threw me under the bus.

“It’s a bad idea,” I whispered.

“Well any idea will do because right now we have nothing,” Pixis nodded, waiting for me to say my idea.

“Well, Hitch’s power can make the team invisible even out in the open.”

“Well, yes she could, but it would definitely be cutting it close; they would have to be done within the hour or her power might start to backlash, and hour might even be pushing it.”

“Well, that is the smaller camp so that should cut some time off right?” Shadis asked.

“Smaller, but has a heavier guard presence which might add more strain,” Pixis said.

“We would have to ask her about her limits, but it’s a good back up plan for now,” Shadis nodded.

“We might need a backup plan for our backup plan,” Nanaba sighed.

“Right now I think that’s a good place to leave off. We have a basic team outline and we can plan the rest after lunch but right now we need to think about getting food. I'm sure everyone is hungry. Besides, it gives us time to talk to Nanaba and Hitch and find out if either of them are up for the mission,” Pixis said standing up.

“Sounds good,” I nodded and gave him a smile.

“Alright, Eren, Levi, and I will meet here after lunch with Petra and after we are done talking with her I will come grab you two and we will figure out our next step. Whether that be talking to Hitch or something else we will see.”

Levi and I sat in the common area while they went to go pick up food for everyone. “Thanks for throwing me under the bus in there… multiple times.”

“I didn’t throw you under the bus, I just gave you a helpful nudge.”

“Helpful nudge,” I raised an eyebrow, yeah a nudge straight into oncoming traffic with a bus barreling towards me.

“Okay, okay, I threw you under the bus a little, but it worked out in the end. I just wanted your ideas to be heard. You were so worried that none of them would work that you were never going to get your ideas out there.”

“Yeah, but still,” I mumbled. I mean he’s right but I didn’t really feel like admitting it out loud. Don’t you dare say anything Levi. I thought to him already seeing the smug smile form on his lips.

He just leaned in and placed a kiss on my lips. “I’m not going to say anything. Just that I love you.”

“I love you too, even if you are a smug asshole.”

“Says the nervous dumpster fire of a human being.”

“Ouch,” I mumbled, “well at least I’m not a shitty person who throws my own boyfriend under the bus.”

“Yes you are,” Levi laughed, “I’ve lost track of how many times you’ve done that.”

“Well to be fair I probably had a reason,” I shrugged.

“Yeah well so do I,” he said.

I just nodded. “I guess we’re even.”


	52. Recon Briefing

Lunch went by fairly quickly. Eren and I headed back to the meeting room where Pixis was already waiting. Petra wasn't far behind us. When she took a seat I could tell she already knew something was up.

“So how is your day going,” Pixis said trying to ease into it.

“Spit it out, what did you call me in here for,” Petra said with a raised eyebrow.

Pixis let out a defeated sigh. “Well, we know that you’ve never been one for missions, but we wanted to see if you would be willing to come on one.”

“Pixis-,” she started, but he cut her off.

“Before you say anything just yet we wanted to explain just a little,” he said and she nodded letting him continue. “We know that you aren’t for violence and that you want no part in that. However, this mission is strictly recon. We are just gathering information,” he said and I could tell she still wasn’t totally convinced.

“Information that will actually help us minimize the violence later,” I said and she turned to look at me. “The more information we are able to collect during this mission the more we will know when we raid the camp meaning there's less of a chance that anyone on either side will get severely injured.”

The room went quiet for a minute. I could tell she was thinking about it. She was weighing the pros and cons in her head and her answer could have gone either way. “Okay.” She finally said.

“Did you just say okay?” Pixis asked, making sure he heard her correctly.

She let out a sigh and nodded, “yes. I’ll go on the mission, but I know the drill with these recon missions. If things go wrong and violence erupts I won’t help fight.”

“We’re not asking you too. That’s why we have Eren and Levi going too they will be able to get everyone out safely with minimal violence if something were to go wrong,” Pixis nodded.

“Good,” she stood to leave but not before I caught a thought in her head that made my heart sink. Normally I would have turned this mission down without a second thought, but if I can help even just a little bit maybe it will prevent another death from happening.

The only reason Petra agreed was that she’s still thinking about Ilsa’s death. A part of me wanted to call her back in and tell her that she doesn’t have to break her morals to help us. However, the other part of me knew that she wouldn’t back down now that she’s already agreed.

Pixis excused himself for a moment to go find Shadis and Nanaba to bring them in and tell them what Perta decided. From here we were going to be moving on to the next steps which were coming up with some plans after that we will need to make sure everyone is okay with going on the mission if yes we start practicing and refining the plans if no we have to start from square one and find new people.

I looked over at Eren who was still stuck in his head. He was nervous about coming up with plans. I could hear his thoughts going over different plans already but he wouldn’t let himself fully think them through without cutting himself off calling it stupid.

I put a hand on his shoulder. His eyes met mine as he snapped out of his head for a moment. “Your plans are always amazing so please stop calling them stupid.”

“Sorry, I’m just...” his voice drifted off.

“Overthinking every little thing, and panicking yourself,” I finished for him.

“Yeah that,” he sighed. “I don’t know how it was so easy before, now everything I think up just sounds wrong.”

“I know it’s hard but that’s why I’m here. If you can’t tell if your plan is actually good or not, run it by me and I’ll help you figure it out okay?”

“Okay,” he mumbled.

I heard footsteps behind me and saw Pixis come back in with the other two following him. “Alright, let’s get planning,” he said, taking a seat. We brainstormed for a little while until we came up with a pretty solid plan.

“I think we should pull the others in and explain the plan to them and see if they are okay with joining the mission before we go any further,” Pixis said.

“Who will brief them?” Nanaba asked.

“Let Levi and Eren do it, the others are more relaxed around them,” Pixis said before turning to us. “You can either brief one team at a time or both at once it’s up to you how you want to do it. When you're done meet us in my office.”

“Will do,” I nodded. We all stood to leave.

Eren and I went to start looking for everyone when I heard him laugh. “What?”

“We both ended up on both recon missions again.”

“What can I say we’re just that good,” I shrugged.

He rolled his eyes at me and nudged me, “more like workaholics.”

“That too.”

We found Petra and we didn’t even need to say anything she just nodded and started heading back to the meeting room. Hanji and Erwin were actually together which made finding them a lot easier. They were sitting in the common area. We walked over and told them where to head for the briefing.

Ymir and Armin were also in the common area so we just grabbed them while we were there. Lastly, we found Marlowe in his room with Hitch and Thomas. We asked if he and Thomas could meet us in the meeting room and they agreed.

We took a seat in the meeting room after telling everyone where to sit. We sat Hanji and Thomas all the way to one side of the table while we sat Perta on the other. We told the others they could sit anywhere between them. They were a little confused at first until Eren explained that we are briefing for two separate missions.

“We are briefing for both missions because most of you are in both of the missions so we figured it would be easier to just do them both at once,” I explained when there still seemed to be some confusion.

“Makes sense,” Hanji nodded, so what are the two missions, and who is on each.” She said trying to get a better understanding.

The only thing almost everyone seemed confused about is why Petra was here if it was a mission briefing. I wonder how they are going to react to hearing that she actually agreed to this.

“You and Thomas are the only ones who are strictly on the mountain mission. Petra is the only one who is strictly on the desert mission.”

“Wait so Petra is on a mission?” Ymir asked looking at her. “Since when do you go on missions?”

“Well, I was promised that it was strictly Recon and that if anything bad happens I would not be involved.” She shrugged.

“I’m still surprised that you agreed even to that,” Erwin said.

“Honestly so am I,” She mumbled.

“So the rest of us are on both missions?” Marlowe asked.

“Yes,” Eren answered before looking to me. I nodded and he took a breath before continuing. “We will be telling you the plan and if you are uncomfortable with any aspect of it or just don’t want to be on these missions then please feel free to let us know at any time.”

We were met with silent nods as everyone agreed. “Alright,” let’s get started,” I said leaning forward.


	53. Gaining Confidence

After Levi filled them in on what we did know, which wasn’t a lot I started filling them in on all the blanks. “We know mostly where the camp is up to a few miles, they managed to get us a location that's far enough away that Erwin can safely portal us in.”

“So are we going to be hunting around for a bit after we portal in?” Armin asked.

“Not exactly. We have a general direction but it will take some walking.”

“Makes sense I mean I’m sure it’s less of a walk than the last time,” Ymir said in a hopeful voice.

“Oh definitely,” Levi nodded, “we actually know where we’re going so it will be a lot shorter.

“As for the number of guards we still aren’t sure what we are walking into,” I said and everyone went quiet. “I have some plans that should keep us safe even if we get spotted, but the goal is that it doesn’t come to that.”

“If we get spotted chances are they are going to double the guard placements not just at one camp but at all of them. This means our plans to raid any camp ever will be dead in the water,” Levi crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair.

Everyone got really quiet. The room fell silent as everyone thought about this. I could tell they were all thinking the same thing whether we succeed or fail. These will probably be the last camps we can ever raid. I mean if you think about it they aren’t just going to let us keep raiding camps every few months they will increase the guards after this indefinitely. We needed these missions to work to save as many people as we can. After raiding these camps we will have to find another way to help. I’m just hoping that whatever we decided to do next will help as much as this.

“Okay, let’s hear the plans then,” Ewin spoke up.

“Well, the plans are mostly how to stay out of sight for the missions while people gather information,” I explained. Recon missions were hard to plan for since we really don’t know what we are walking into.

“So for the desert mission, I was thinking we would portal in a little ways from the camp. Once we get to a distance where it would no longer be safe for us to go further without being spotted that’s where Petra and Levi come in. Petra’s power can make part of the ground into gas particles Levi’s power can move said particle around until they are above us. She will then solidify it while Levi’s power holds it above us creating cover for the team. We can tunnel closer to the camp using their powers. Once we are close enough which we will be able to see by Marlowe and Armin’s powers that is when Armin, Erwin, and Ymir can go gather information.”

“That's genius!” Hanji yelled before covering her mouth, sorry, I’m not even on that mission but it sounds so cool!”

“Petra do you think you can pull it off? You will be using your power a lot more than you are used too,” Levi asked, making sure she was still on board after hearing the plan.

“I don’t know how my power will hold up to that much use, but I will try my best,” she said with determination in her eyes.

“Anyone else have any objections or additions to the plan?” Levi asked.

Looking around everyone shook their heads except Erwin who looked to Petra giving her some comforting words, “while on the mission don’t push yourself. If you think you are at your limit let us know we have plenty of time if you need to take a break between tunneling.”

She thanked him and nodded. No one else seemed to have anything to add so I moved on to the next mission.

“For the mountain mission, I added Hanji because this mountain supposedly has a lot of trees and greenery. I was thinking that if these trees are even a little like the last forest we were in, maybe you could provide us cover in the branches or bushes. If not your power will still be very useful to have around especially if stuff goes sideways.”

“Makes sense,” she nodded.

“We were also told there were cliffs and ledges around and I had a few backup plans with those depending on how much cover we can or can’t find. This mission doesn’t have as much of a guarantee with cover as the desert one so we have to plan in case something goes wrong.”

“Alright, so basically just hide where we can in the forest or cliffs until they gather the information?” Hanji asked.

“Yes, however, there was one more thing I wanted to add. We might have to get in contact with our team in a hurry if stuff does go sideways which is why I added Thomas to this team. What is the range of your power?” I asked him.

“As long as the people who I am trying to use my power on are next to me when I activate my powers it doesn’t matter how far they go from me or each other. It won’t affect my power. The only thing that does is time. The more people connected to my power the less time we have.”

“Alright, so right before we send Armin and Erwin in the camp we will have you activate your power. If we only connect those two to me how long do you estimate your power will last?”

“Roughly two hours,” he said and I felt a lot better about our time limit. Recon missions usually only take about an hour because people’s powers can only last so long. This camp was bigger, but it supposedly had fewer guards because it was only a red and green badge camp.

“That should be plenty of time,” Levi nodded and we all looked around.

“I know that plan wasn’t as foolproof as the other one, but I have a lot of backup plans for it. I need to see the surroundings before coming up with anything to concrete,” I said being perfectly honest with them.

“That's fine with me,” Hanji shrugged, “your plans are always amazing whether you’ve come up with them on the spot or have had weeks to think about it. I trust that you will come up with something good.”

I looked around with the others seeing if my lack of a solid plan would scare any of them away.

“Sounds fine with me,” Erwin finally said looking at the others and everyone else seemed okay with it.

They have way too much trust in me. I don’t even have that much trust in myself.

“Well then that’s all for now we will call you all in when we figure out when the missions will be,” Levi said dismissing them as I was too busy having an internal crisis.

When everyone left I felt him wrap his arms around me. “You will do fine Eren,” don’t stress about it too much. We have plenty of time to plan something else. Even once the mission starts we are portaling in a good distance from the camp we will be able to think of something.

“I hope you’re right,” I sighed. “I just don’t want to let everyone down. They are all counting on me to think of something amazing, and I don’t know if I have it in me this time.”

“You thought the same thing about the desert missions right?” Levi asked and I nodded. “And you came up with an amazing plan for that one.

“That was dumb luck,” I whispered.

“No, that was skill. You are very skilled at coming up with out of the box ideas that keep everyone safe. You need to give yourself more credit rather than just chalking it all up to dumb luck.”

I just took a deep breath and nodded. “Yeah I guess, but still it’s hard to think of it as a skill when I’m pulling plans outta my ass.”

“That's what makes it skill, you realize that other people take weeks, even months to think up plans that take you just a few minutes to come up with.”

“You’re over-exaggerating,” I rolled my eyes.

“Not at all, you remember how long it took Pixis and Erwin to come up with some plans before they started asking you for help, and half the time they ended up going up shits creek.”

I took a moment to think about what he was saying and I couldn’t help but laugh at some of the disastrous plans. “Now that you mention it I do remember.”

“See, you’ve got real skill that can’t be matched.”

I nodded more confidently this time, “I guess I do.”

“There’s the Eren I know. The one who was so confident in his plans he was ready to take on a whole camp singlehandedly.”

“Babe that wasn’t because I’m confident, that’s because I’m stupid.”

“I mean confidence is just stupid done right,” Levi shrugged

“What the hell does that even mean,” I couldn’t help but laugh at his nonsense.

“Honestly I don’t even know it’s just the first thing that came to mind," he laughed.


	54. Playing Dirty

After talking with Pixis, Shadis and Nanaba we scheduled the missions two days apart from each other. The first one starts tomorrow night. We started with the desert mission since that one had a more solid plan than the other. We went to tell the others when their missions were scheduled and they all were relieved that it was sooner rather than later, even Petra seemed to be relieved to be getting it done and out of the way rather than having to dwell on it for a week first.

After dinner, we decided to get in a few sparring matches before bed. We had Jean and Marco spot us to help keep score. We've been doing nothing but sparring these last few weeks since its all we could do to keep our mind off of everything. Before we started we were at 10-11. I was one above Levi since in our last match I managed to knock him out of the circle in the very beginning through a strategy that I never thought would actually work.

"That's because you cheated," Levi rolled his eyes as we walked into the sparing circle. "As the countdown started you leaned in and gave me a kiss and the second they said go you flung me out of the circle with a gravity field."

"It was smart right?" I asked with a big smile.

"It was rude," Levi crossed his arms.

"It was pretty smart," Jean said and I saw Marco glare at him.

"Jean if you try that on me I will give you frostbite the next time I suck your dick," Marco mumbled and both me and Levi gave each other big smiles as we tried not to laugh.

"Noted," Jean mumbled in a scared tone.

We took a few breaths and Levi helped me put on my braces before backed away from each other and gave Jean a nod.

"Three... two... one... Spar!"

Jean said and instantly I felt my body get pulled towards Levi's. Interesting, he usually starts by trying to throw me out of the ring not pull me towards the middle. I felt the pull on my body stop as we stood face to face. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into the kiss.

If this is a way of you getting payback ya know what I don't really mind. I grabbed onto him tight so He couldn't throw me out of the ring.

"Get a room," Jean yelled from outside the circle.

I felt as Levi started walking me backward. He's trying to get me to walk out of the ring. I'm almost tempted to let him. Almost. I flipped the gravity and pinned him to the ceiling before breaking the kiss to give him a smug smile.

"Come on if you want payback you have to try harder than that."

"Maybe I didn't want payback I just wanted to kiss you?" He said but I didn't believe him especially not with that devious smile. "Or maybe it was all part of the plan," he said and I instantly felt what he meant. We both started falling to the floor as Levi's powers caught us. He instantly sent me down outside of the circle.

"What happened?" Jean asked.

Levi just started laughing as I sat on the floor embarrassed. "Now that is cheating," I said, pulling my legs up to my chest to try and hide.

"It's not cheating I just simply took both of our emotions and amplified them before putting them all on you," he shrugged.

"What emotions made you stop dead in your tracks like that?" Marco asked and Jean instantly caught on.

"You made him pop a boner," he cried out in laughter, "now that is playing dirty," he said clapping his hands together as he laughed so hard he was having trouble breathing.

"Oh shut up," I rolled my eyes. "Now do you mind?" I looked at Levi desperately.

"Oh right I should probably stop using my powers on you," he laughed.

"Ya think." I felt everything go back to normal, well mostly everything, as Levi pushed a calm emotion onto me. It was gonna take a few minutes for everything to calm down so I suggested Jean and Marco take a turn.

Jean and Marco took a few minutes to prepare while Levi walked up and sat on the ground next to me. "Now we're even," he shrugged. "In both ways cause now we are back to being tied up," he said smugly.

"You guys are just lucky we were the ones spotting you could you imagine pulling that stunt in front of Pixis or Erwin?" Jean laughed.

"Pulling what stunt?" I heard Pixis's voice ask from behind us and I felt my blood run cold. Jean you dumbass just had to say something.

"Um, I don't think we want to know," I heard Nanaba say. I turned around and saw them standing near the doorway.

"I hope we aren't interrupting anything we just figured we would watch you guys spar, but maybe that was a bad idea," he asked looking at us for permission.

"It's okay we've got all of our delinquent activities out of the way," Levi said trying to hold in a laugh.

"You mean you've got all your delinquent activities out of the way," I crossed my arms throwing him under the bus.

"As long as you don't hurt each other too bad I could care less how you get each other out of the circle." Pixis shrugged.

"Even if you are fighting dirty," he said with a smile. That's when all four of us collectively realized he heard more than we thought.

My face went as red as a tomato and Levi was sitting there still laughing to himself. Man, I remember when we first started dating and he was the one embarrassed about all of this stuff. What happened to that guy? I mentally asked.

"You corrupted him," he whispered in my ear and I felt a chill run down my spine and go straight to my-.

"Would you stop using your damn power on me! I'm still trying to calm down from the last time you did," I mumbled and rolled my eyes.

"I didn't even use it on you that time," he said with a smile before leaning in and whispering again, "glad to know you are just that easily excitable all I have to do is whisper in your ear."

I felt another shiver run down my spine before hitting his arm with the back of my hand. "Knock it off," I glared.

"Whenever you guys are done flirting, we are ready to start," Jean teased."

"Before I could tell him to shut the hell up Levi started the countdown.

"Three... two... one... Spar!" He said and they started.

"What's there scores?" Pixis asked, walking over to us. I just made sure to keep my legs pulled close to me.

"Marco 14 Jean 15," Levi answered.

Jean aimed his fire at Marco's feet trying to get him to back out of the ring when Marco put an ice wall between them to give him some time to think. Instantly Jean melted it only to see Marco wasn't there. While Jean took a moment to melt the wall Marco had slipped around it. He made it behind him and before Jean could whip around to face him Marco had already struck. He froze all the water on the floor that Jean had melted before using his ice to shove him quickly, sending him sliding out of the circle.

"That was a cheap shot," Jean laughed as Marco walked over and helped him up.

"Hey, it worked," Marco shrugged.


	55. Embarrassed

We were going to do a few more rounds, but I had to call it early because after Levi’s little stunt I just couldn’t calm down.

Jean and Marco decided to do another round and I felt a spike of frustration quickly come and go. That wasn’t mine. Levi’s frustrated? Why? I felt really tired all of a sudden and let out a yawn before hearing Levi do the same. He turned to Pixis, “Hey I think Eren and I are getting tired, do you mind spotting them? Were going to head to bed.”

“Sure, goodnight guys.”

I felt the sudden tiredness disappear and looked at Levi to see what he was thinking. He just helped me off the floor and gave me a smile before we started walking towards our room. I ended up walking holding my jacket in my hands in front of me.

We headed to our room feeling rather accomplished. We got some practice in, well if you could even call it that, and not only did we plan everything out, but now we have 4 missions coming up. Two recon missions and two raids. It was both exciting and frightening.

“Everything will go smoothly,” I told myself more trying to convince myself than anything.

“Everything will go smoothly because you came up with the plans,” Levi said as we walked into the room.

“I hope you’re right,” I sighed before plopping down on the bed.

“Now, you want to explain why you made us go to bed early? I’m not even tired?” I asked.

“Oh you will be when I get done with you,” Levi said and I sat up only to see him already shirtless walking towards me.

“Oh fuck yes,” I blurted out without even thinking.

“What did you really think I would just leave you hanging?” Levi asked his hand already on my thigh.

I couldn’t even find the words to respond. All of my thoughts left my head as I focused on where he was touching. His hand slowly moving up my thigh closer and closer until- “fuck you.” I blurted out when he moved his hand off of my thigh and up to my face.

“What?” he asked with that stupid smug smile of his.

“I hate you.”

“Sure you do,” he laughed, “I’ll have you screaming how much you love me in a little while.” I just rolled my eyes and looked away from his stupid pretty face. I want to tease that smug little smile off of his face.

“You can sure try, but I don’t think you will get very far,” he said and before I could even argue with him I felt his lips on mine as he pushed me down on the bed. One hand was on my chest slowly sliding under my shirt while his other was pulling me deeper into the kiss.

Fuck him I can’t even argue he makes it to hard.

“That’s not the only thing I make hard,” he breathed, pulling away from the kiss before pulling my shirt over my head and throwing it aside.

“I remember when you were innocent, what happened to that?”

“I was never innocent, I was just embarrassed.”

“Still, you don’t get embarrassed in front of me anymore?” I almost felt a little offended by that.

“It’s hard to be embarrassed in front of you when we spend every second of the day with each other, seen each other naked more times than we can count, and when I can literally read your mind whenever I want. I am so desensitized to the feeling of embarrassment that I usually have to feel it through someone else now.”

“I mean I’ve seen you embarrassed a few times. Like when You accidentally told Pixis off.”

“That’s different,” he rolled his eyes. “That's more of a fear response, not embarrassment. Besides you don’t get embarrassed in front of me either.”

“I mean-.” I cut myself off and tried to stop my thoughts but I knew it was too late when I saw that evil smile on Levi’s face. I stared Levi in the eyes, “forget about it.”

“Nope you already let it slip,” he laughed, “do it. He said sitting back to enjoy the view.

“I’m not doing that.”

“Well then goodnight,” Levi said rolling over.

“Fucking excuse me?” I asked and he rolled over to look at me with that stupid innocent grin on his face.

“What?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about.

“Well if you aren’t horny enough to do that then you aren’t horny enough for me to fuck you.” He said and I just stared at him. You can’t be fucking serious. “Besides I know you may be in the mood, but who says I’m in the mood?” He said with a shrug, “I mean that would definitely put me in the mood.”

I wanted to call his bluff but I knew he wasn’t bluffing. This man is stubborn as all hell and he will wait it out until I break.

“I fucking hate you.” I groaned before getting up and grabbing the lube. He sat up to get a good view with an innocent smile. I want to punch him in the face.

“Now that's some really kinky shit.”

“Shut the fuck up, I can do without the sass for once,” I said before sitting on the edge of the bed.

“Closer,” he said and I flicked my eyes up to glare into his.

“Drop dead,” I said scooting a tiny bit closer to him.

“Closer,” he said again. I was so close to telling him to shove it that I would go to the bathroom and do it myself but I already knew what he would say back.

“Good luck walking to the bathroom with that boner, hopefully no one walks in on you,” he smiled and I rolled my eyes.

I just groaned and rolled my eyes, “How fucking close do you want me?” I asked through gritted teeth.

“Hmm,” he thought for a moment before sitting all the way up. I want you to straddle my lap,” he said with a devious grin.

“No,” I said plainly.

“Then goodnight,” he said, flopping back down.

I let out a loud frustrated groan before sliding off my pants and boxers and straddling his lap. “Change your mind?” he said smugly.

“Shut the fuck up,” I snapped at him.

“You are just blowing this way out of proportion. I'm not asking for that much.”

“What do you mean, this is so embarrassing.”

“Don’t be embarrassed, I mean you’ve probably done this a ton of times.”

“Yeah, but not without watching my every move,” I rolled my eyes.

“So what, Eren we’ve done more embarrassing shit than this.” Levi rolled his eyes but he could still feel my nerves. “Just pretend I’m not here if it helps.”

“How can I do that when I’m sitting on your lap.”

“You’ll find a way.”

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. This is so stupid. I poured some lube in my hands and slid my hand down. I took another deep breath before inserting a finger. I bit my lip to stop from making any weird noises or faces.

“Don’t hold back,” I heard Levi whisper.

“You are making it awfully hard to forget that you are here,” I mumbled back a little annoyed.

“Sorry.”

I took a deep breath trying to forget he was there again which is really hard since I feel his hands on my hips. I slid in another finger and began sliding them in and out. My other hand went straight to stroke my dick and I leaned forward against Levi for support. A moan slipped out before I could stop it. “Ah, Levi.”

My face went bright red as my eyes shot open. I looked at him and his eyes were wide and he had a grin on his face. Before I could say another word he moved me so fast. He pinned me down flat against the bed and moved on top of me. I felt his lips on my neck as he let out a breathy whisper, “you’re so fucking hot babe.”

He threw his pants and boxers to the side and I felt his hands on my hips as he pulled me closer to him. He hooked his arms under my legs pulling my ass closer to him as he got in position. “Ready?” he asked.

“Fuck yes.”

He looked up and I saw a condom fly across the room and land in his hand. He quickly put it on and gave me a wink before sliding it in. I bit my lip and ground my hips to let him know I wanted more. I didn’t have to ask twice he instantly picked up the pace, thrusting deeper into me.

An idea shot through my mind and I let a smile slip.

“Wait don't-.” he started to say but it was too late before he could finish his sentence I went through with it. I used my power and pinned him to the ceiling.

“Let me take control for a minute,” I said and he just rolled his eyes, unable to move. He was about to say something but I pressed my lips to his to silence him. I didn’t want to hear any more sass.

Being upside down wasn’t the most fun especially, but riding Levi like that sure felt good. Grinding my hips into his and bouncing them up and down on his dick I felt myself getting closer and closer. I could barely keep kissing him and my mind was going blank. This is genius. Why haven’t I thought about using my power sooner?

Oh, fuck that's why. I thought as my wrists ached and I almost dropped us. If it wasn’t for Levi’s power catching us that would have been a painful fall.

“That’s what I was trying to tell you, genius. Don’t use your powers without your braces,” he rolled his eyes before using his power to lower us back down to the bed gently. He picked me up and pinned me against the wall, “if you wanted me to fuck you against a hard surface all you had to do was ask,” Levi said and I couldn’t even think up a response.

I felt his lips kiss down my next before biting down leaving bite marks and hickeys all over my neck and shoulders. Between his mouth on my neck, my back against the cold wall, his hands on my leg and hip holding me up, and him thrusting into me like that. I was losing my mind as the pleasure took over.

“So close,” I managed to blurt out.

“Come for me baby,” he whispered in my ear before biting at my neck again. His words went straight to my dick as I felt myself get pushed over the edge.

“Coming,” breathed out. He wasn’t too far behind me.

He carried me back over to the bed before letting out a deep breath, “that was fucking hot,” he said and I laid my head down on his chest.

“Hell yeah it was," I breathed.


	56. Permanent

I woke up to someone shaking my arm and whispering my name. "Eren, Eren, wake up. Come on Eren please."

I opened my eyes and looked up at the shadow figure standing above me. Everything was so blurry and dark.

"What time is it?" I asked, still trying to figure out who exactly I was talking too.

"Shh, quiet down you're going to wake Levi. I don't know what time it is it's the middle of the night," I heard the voice say.

Well, I guess that crosses one person off the list of who it could be. I mean it was a guy talking to me but in my sleep trance, I couldn't pinpoint it exactly even though it sounded really familiar. I wasn't even sure if this was actually real this all feels like a dream, but that could just be my tiredness talking.

"Can we talk in the common room?" they asked.

"Sure," I said before wiggling out of Levi's arm and throwing off the covers.

"Um, please get dressed first, I'll meet you out there," they said and I realized I was still only in my boxers.

I got dressed in some lounging clothes and woke up a little before walking out to the common area where I saw a lantern's light and a person sitting at a table.

Well, this definitely isn't a dream. I walked closer and they turned around to look at me.

"Jean?" I asked getting a clearer look at his face. "What's up with all the secrecy?" I asked taking a seat across from him at the makeshift table.

"I have something I want to say, but I don't want Marco or Levi to know. Can you keep this a secret from Levi?" He asked and I just stared at him.

"The man can read minds, how the hell do you expect me to do that?"

"I mean you've done it before," he said and I knew exactly what he was referring to.

"If you are talking about when I hid my crush on him that's different it was years ago and he's gotten better at using his powers and he's way less oblivious, besides he knows when I'm keeping secrets now by just my body language alone."

"Well if he does find out can you tell him not to say anything?" Jean said desperately.

I've never heard him sound this desperate before... or scared. It's starting to worry me. "If he knows it's a secret he won't say anything," I nodded.

"Okay good," he took a deep breath.

"So what is this about?"

"I think I found out about another backlash," Jean said his tone sounded worried.

I felt a shiver go down my spine. Backlash was never a good thing to find out and it's always scary and I'm assuming it's something really bad since he seems really scared about it. "What happened?"

"Well, it's been happening for a few weeks now," Jean said, biting his lip. A few weeks why didn't he say anything sooner? "Remember right after Ilsa's death we all started sparring and one day we decided to spar all night long to keep the thoughts away?"

"How could I forget," I said rubbing at my own wrists which definitely suffered some backlash.

"Well, remember how I said I felt like we overdid it by a lot?" He said looking down at his hands.

"Yeah."

"Well, I don't think I realize how much I overdid it," he took a deep breath and looked back up at me. "I thought it was nothing that it would just go away after I got some rest. When it didn't I thought maybe I just needed a day and a day turned into a week and when it hit the two-week mark I started to get nervous, now it's been almost three weeks and it still hasn't gone away and I'm afraid I may have done permanent damage." I could feel the fear radiating off of him but I still wasn't sure what he was talking about.

"Permanent damage to what?" I asked.

"Hold my hands." He said and I was a little confused but he put his hands out on the table in front of me. Everything looked normal, no weird bruising or burn marks on his hands or anything. I reached my hands out and held his hands and I watched him close his eyes and grit his teeth. I let go of his hands instantly.

"Sorry did I hurt you!" I said quickly I just barely touched them.

"You didn't hurt me," he said and I saw tears slipping down his cheek. "I couldn't feel anything." He left his hands on the table in front of me.

"What?" I was confused for a minute and then it all hit me. "Wait you didn't feel anything. Like at all?" I asked before reaching back and grabbing his hand. He just stared down at where I held his hand.

"If I didn't see you grab my hand I wouldn't have known you even touched it," he said looking away.

"This has been going on for three weeks and you haven't said anything about it," I asked, almost frustrated. I get he was scared, but maybe just maybe Hanji could have helped.

"I know what you are going to say and it won't work," Jean said letting out a defeated sigh, "you and I both know that Hanji can't heal backlash. Besides she already knows."

"She already knows?" I asked a little shocked.

"Yeah, she found out when I had her heal one of my burns she could feel what was wrong with my hands and I told her not to say anything until I was ready."

I just stayed quiet. I didn't know what to say, I didn't know what to do. I just let go of his hand and looked away trying to think up a solution but I just kept drawing blanks.

"I didn't come to you for an answer," he said quickly, "I came to you because I needed someone who would listen," he said and I could feel how exhausted he sounded. I wonder how many sleepless nights he's stayed awake worrying about this alone.

"Why don't you want Marco to know?" I asked and he shook his head.

"I don't want him to worry."

"He's your boyfriend, you should tell him. You know the longer you wait to tell him the more hurt he will be."

"I know, I just can't tell him yet. I haven't even fully accepted it and telling him means that I would have to. I keep telling myself that the feeling is going to come back, that it's just taking a long time because I really overdid it, but a part of me knows that this is permanent." He let out a sigh and looked up at me, "how did you tell Levi? I mean you were the first one of us to experience permanent backlash, how did you do it?"

"I mean don't get me wrong I was the same way when my wrists started hurting and wouldn't stop, but lucky for me I didn't have to tell Levi. He knew the second it started happening that something was wrong."

"No fair, your boyfriend can just tell when somethings up. Mine I actually have to talk to," Jean sighed. "Talking is so much harder."

I couldn't help but laugh a little, "yeah I guess I really lucked out on this one."

"You really did you lucky bastard," he smiled.

"So wait how far up does it go?" I asked. Could he not feel anything anywhere or was it just his arms?"

"It's just my hands I can feel my wrists, but not anything past them," he said pointing to the spot on his arm where the feeling ended. He started laughing but there was more pain than joy behind that laugh. "How fucking ironic."

"What is?"

"Well, just a few months ago I was yelling at you for being reckless and telling you not to overdo it so when all of this is over and when I marry Marco you could raise a glass without your arms being fucked up. Well, guess I needed to take my own advice cause now look at who has the fucked up hands."

"At least you can still use them, that's the important thing. You wills till be able to pick up the ring and put it on Marco's finger and that's the important part," I said and I saw him smile.

"That actually made me feel a little better," he said quietly.

"So how did you first find out?" I asked, clearing my throat as I changed back to the original topic.

"It was later that night on our way back to our room. Marco and I usually hold hands while we walk. When we got into our room Marco asked me if something was wrong and I told him no and asked him why. He asked me why I didn't hold his hand back while we walked. I didn't even realize he was holding my hand, to begin with."

"What did you end up telling him?"

"I just told him I was really tired and my mind must have wandered off," Jean shrugged. "It sucks," he let out a frustrated sigh. "Not only does it stop me from actually being able to feel Marco when I put my hand up to his face or hold his hand or... other things, but it also is fucking with my other powers. Now I can't tell when I overuse my fire because usually, I can tell when my hands start to burn a little but apparently I can't feel any pain in my hands either."

"Wait so when you burned your hand sparring the other day it wasn't because you were determined to win?"

"No that's just what I told everyone so they wouldn't worry about me as much."

"Is that when Hanji found out?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"Who else knows?"

"You and Hanji are the only ones," he said quietly.

"You should probably tell Pixis that's something he might need to know and I'm sure he won't tell anyone."

Jean just smiled and let out a forced laugh, "that's what Hanji said too."

"Well she's right then," I said and Jean nodded.

"I know."

"I feel like there's a but coming," I said, raising an eyebrow.

"However-,"

"That's just a fancy but," I cut him off.

"Look I'm just not ready to tell anyone. You were the only exception cause I know you will listen and won't run around telling everyone. I just need some time to let it sink in for myself before I tell anyone else. Including Marco."

I nodded, "that's fair, but if shit starts to go sideways on missions because of this you need to come to me immediately," I said staring him dead in the eyes.

"I know that's part of what I was going to ask you. I need someone to have my back while I figure this out and I know you and Levi are probably going to be the only ones who will actually have my back without telling anyone."

"I thought you didn't want me to tell Levi?" I asked.

"Well I would prefer if he didn't know, but you said it yourself he will find out," Jean shrugged.

"If he hasn't already found out already," I mumbled, "I mean if you've been dealing with this for almost three weeks now chances are he already knows."

"He does," we both whipped around hearing a voice in the darkness.

"Fuck Levi," I said eyes widening.

Jean just whipped his head back around and stared at the floor. "Sorry, I don't mean to interrupt, but I came to see where Eren disappeared from."

"How much did you hear?" I asked.

"All of it," he shrugged.

"Why the fuck were you eavesdropping," I rolled my eyes.

"I didn't mean to, but after following you out here I saw the lantern and the light was really bright and I couldn't really see to get back to the room so I just leaned up against the wall." I just let out a sigh and looked back to Jean who looked absolutely drained.

"If it makes you feel better to know I won't tell anyone. I mean I've gone without telling anyone for this long and I've known since like day two," Levi said and Jean looked up.

"You have?"

"Yeah, when people are worried about stuff and trying extra hard not to think about it then their thoughts end up being louder and harder to tune out," Levi said before walking up and putting a hand on his shoulder. "I know this is terrifying, but we have your back. And don't worry about telling Marco right away let it process for yourself and when you do tell him he will understand,"

"Thank you," Jean said quietly to Levi before taking a deep breath. "Well thank you both for listening, and keeping this a secret, and sorry to wake you up, but this just drained the last bit of energy I had left, so I'm going to head back to bed before Marco comes looking for me," He stood to leave and I felt my body move on its own.

I stood up and threw my arms around him. I could tell he needed that hug with how tightly he hugged me back. He usually tells me he hates hugs or just gives me a little hug to keep up the illusion that he hates them, but I could feel him cling to me for what seemed like dear life. I felt his arms shake and his breathing hitch. I heard Levi walk closer before seeing him put a hand on his back and rubbing it.

After a minute Jean took a deep breath and let me go before whispering out in a shakey, "thank you I really needed that." he kept his eyes to the ground as we all walked back to our rooms. We had to follow him because he had the only lantern and surprisingly Levi was right. It was so hard to see without one after looking at the light.

We headed into our room after wishing him goodnight. I sat on the bed and looked at Levi who just nodded.

"I'm worried about him too. He said, taking a seat next to me, "but there's nothing more we can do tonight. It's best to get some sleep. We have to be up early in the morning for practice.

"You're right," I let out a sigh before climbing into bed as he did the same.


	57. Jinxed

When I woke up to a pillow smacking me in the face. "What the hell," I said, shooting up dizzy as hell as I looked around for the culprit. I bashed my head straight into Levi's as he sat up too apparently getting hit by the person as well.

"Ouch what the fuck Ymir," he asked rubbing his head.

"If I have to get up for this stupid mission practice then so do you assholes," she said before storming out of the room.

"Someone's not a morning person," I mumbled, rubbing my head as the headache had already started to form.

"No she is not," Levi sighed, getting out of bed nearly tripping over the bag of clothes as his hand rubbed at his head. I heard him curse under his breath as he jammed his foot on the bag.

"I'm calling it today just isn't your day," I said and he turned around to glare at me.

"If you just fucking jinxed it then I swear to god."

"I thought you didn't believe in jinxes?" I asked with a smug smile.

"I never used to until I started dating you. You convinced me otherwise cause man when you jinx something everything goes to hell."

"Hmm well, who knows if you do have a bad day it might not be because I jinxed it, and instead it might just be karma from eavesdropping on our conversation last night," I shrugged.

I just watched as Levi rolled his eyes and started getting ready for the day. I did the same and on our way to the training rooms we picked up some breakfast that they had brought for everyone. We're on our way down and I watched as Mina bumped into Levi spilling water all over him.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry I wasn't watching where I was going and-."

Levi cut her off, "it's okay," he said before glaring at me. Hey, this means nothing. I thought to him.

"I can grab Marco maybe he can get the water out of your costume?" she suggested before pointing at him he was a few tables away.

"Sure," he said following her over to Marco. He walked back over to me after Marco removed the water from his clothes. Armin grabbed some food and a drink and started heading down with us to the training area. On our way down the stairs, Armin must have tripped because I felt him grab onto me for stability.

"You okay?" I asked as I helped him get a stable footing.

"Yeah thanks for- Oh my god I'm so sorry," he said turning towards Levi who was once again drenched. This time it was his hair and the back of his costume. Oh god maybe I really did jinx it

"It's fine Armin," he said taking a deep breath, "I don't blame you for this," he said glaring daggers into me.

"I can go grab Marco-," Armin started to suggest.

"No it's fine, besides I'm sure it will just happen again if we do," he sighed.

"Okay," Armin said a little confused, "I'm really sorry," he said again quietly.

"It's okay, it's just not my day," Levi said back and I didn't dare to look into his eyes this time. I didn't need to I could already feel his eyes burrowing holes into the side of my face."

We made it into the training area and Pixis greeted us with a smile that quickly turned to a confused face. He furrowed his brow but left an awkward smile on his face. "Did you take your shower with your clothes on?" Pixis asked and I felt Levi turn towards me.

"I don't know Eren do you mind explaining what's happening and why?" He asked with a condescending tone.

"No I'm good," I said letting out a little laugh as I tried to keep a straight face.

"Alright then," Pixis said more confused than before but just deciding to drop it. "Well, I hope you two can put whatever your bickering about aside while we run through practice a few times."

"We aren't bickering Levi is just grumpy," I said feeling pure frustration radiate off Levi. Well if he's going to be pissy at me for "jinxing" him I might as well give him a better reason.

"Eren I swear to fucking God," I heard him mumble under his breath.

"Okay," Pixis said not really believing what I was saying as he just turned around and headed to great the last bit of people who walked in.

"Don't you dare," I heard Levi threaten.

"You have to be more specific than that," I said innocently.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about. First, you jinx me and now you are purposely trying to frustrate me."

"So what if I am," I said thinking about the last time we had a mission practice, and all he did was try and embarrass me as well as piss me off.

"That was like a month ago," he rolled his eyes."

I just stared him down and gave him a devious smile. "Payback's a bitch."

Before he could say anything else Ymir walked up. So why do we even have to practice this shit I thought recon missions don't need practice," She groaned. I think she was just pissed off she had to wake up this early.

"Because these missions are different. They are terrains we aren't as used to for missions, and some of these plans rely on hypotheticals. We need to know that these plans will work not just assume they will," I explained.

"Yeah, but if we are just trying to figure out if Petra and Levi can pull this off why do the rest of us have to show up?" She asked.

"Well because first off if they don't work we either have to cancel the mission or change it entirely and second off if it does work we need to know if there are specific obstacles that we didn't think about."

"Like what?"

"Like if she can make a hole big enough for the whole team to fit comfortably since we will probably be in it for several hours while we make our way to the camp and for the actual recon part of it. We also need to know if everyone will have trouble breathing and how many holes we need to have in the ground for us to breathe without feeling like we are suffocating or hyperventilating."

"Yeah I guess that makes sense," she sighed, "damn I was hoping to be excused early so I could go back to bed."

"Just take a nap after," I suggested.

"Yeah but then I won't be as tired."

I would have thought she would have been more tired after being worn out from practice, but who knows." Alright everyone gather around we are about to get started," Pixis called out.

We all headed over and I could still feel Levi glaring me down. I looked around and noticed that the training area was very empty looking. The usual walls and obstacles weren't here. Petra must have cleared them all last night.

"So we are just going to do mission practice for the desert mission so it's not too confusing for everyone," he explained. The main thing we need to test is if it's possible to execute the plan the way we were thinking, there are a few more things we can run over but that's the main thing I know everyone is worried about," Pixis said.


	58. Light Required

We stepped out away from the others and waited for everyone to be ready. For the first test to see if she could actually do it it was just me Levi and Petra testing it out. We were going with as few people as possible on the small chance that we would get stuck under the ground. The fewer people panicking down there the better. Petra and Levi had to go for their powers to be used and me to report back to Pixis of what worked and what didn't.

We waited until Petra gave us a nod telling us she was ready. Pixis had everyone else take a step back. None of us knew what to expect. We didn't even know if this was going to work or not. She took a deep breath and all of a sudden a hole started to form in the ground as dust particles went everywhere.

"Don't breathe it in," she warned. I quickly held my breath as Levi moved the cloud of "dust" behind us as we walked into the hole.

"Ready to be sealed," he said leaving some holes in the dust cloud so when Petra solidified it it wouldn't bury us alive and suffocate us.

There was one major flaw off the bat that I realized down here. Sure there were holes and they were enough to breathe fine from, but there's barely any light coming in, and that's with lanterns just above us, but doing this at night in the pitch-black desert would be impossible. Levi wouldn't be able to see the particles he was moving, and the rest of us wouldn't know if it was safe to breathe or not.

"Open it," I said and Petra did just that with Levi's help. We entered back in and Pixis gave me a confused look.

"I thought we were going to do more tests, did it not work?" he asked.

"It worked, but there's one issue. We need a light."

"Oh right because you need to see better for practice," he said handing me a lantern.

"No, we will need a light for the mission too."

I watched as he stiffened up. "But you guys will stick out like a sore thumb even if you are in the tunnel. The light will peak out through the holes."

"I know, we need to find a way around that, but the light is undebatable we won't be able to do anything without it.

"Okay, but if you can't find a way around it then I will have to call off this mission. It's already too risky as it is, but adding a light to it puts it over the edge."

"I'll find a way," I said confidently. I have to.

"Well, if you'll need a light for the actual mission then I'll just give you guys a flashlight it's easier to turn on and off. Not to mention it's easier to hold." He said before heading up the stairs putting everything on hold for a moment to go grab it.

I walked back over to Petra and Levi in enough time to see Levi slip backward into the holland straight into the cloud of dust that was sitting in it. The dust and dirt clung to his hair and back that was still wet from before.

I tried so hard to hold in my laughter but when his head snapped up to glare at me I lost the little composure I had left. "Damn Levi today really isn't your day," I laughed.

"I'm going to kill you," he threatened as Petra helped him out of the hole.

"You'll have to catch me first," I said before taking off running towards Erwin for some safety.

Erwin just took one look at me as I hid behind him. He looked up at an angry Levi who was marching over towards us and he looked back down at me. "I'm not going to save you," he said and I looked up at him.

"Please, he's going to murder me," I begged.

"Do you see how many knives he has, no you're on your own," he said moving out of the way."

"Oh shit." I watched as Levi looked down at the knives on his jacket almost like Erwin just reminded him about them. "I am so dead."

"Levi went to pull a knife out but I don't know what happened. It slipped out of his hands and instead of using his powers to catch it, I watched as he tried to catch it with his hand.

"Son of a bitch," I heard him curse as the knife sliced the palm of his hand.

Playtime was over. I saw blood dripping from his hand and ran over to help him. "Hey, idiot why didn't you just use your power to catch the damn thing?" I asked but rather than me teasing him my voice actually sounded worried. I looked around for anything that I could use to help stop the bleeding.

"Go find Hanji, she'll help," Erwin said from behind us. "I'll tell Pixis you'll be right back."

"See kiddos this is why you don't play with Knives," Ymir said to Thomas and Marlowe as Levi just rolled his eyes.

I held his hand and used my jacket's sleeve to try and stop the bleeding despite Levi's groaning that it was going to get dirty. It's not like I can't clean it before tonight besides you're more important than a stupid jacket.

On the way up the stairs, we passed Pixis who gave us a confused look and I just told him that Erwin would explain. He nodded and kept going. We found Hanji in the dining hall with Molbit. They were casually talking while they finished there breakfast.

"Hanji," I called getting her attention.

"Hey-" She looked up and gave us a smile before the smile dropped and she furrowed her brow. "Levi, were you rolling on the floor or something? You're all dirty."

"Um, actually we need help fixing his hand," I said before moving my hand away to show her his bloody hand.

"Oh my god what does Pixis have you guys doing down there?" she asked mortified before running over to us.

"Not Pixis, just bad luck," Levi mumbled. He sounded really but hurt probably because he fumbled his own knife in front of everyone.

Hanji fixed up Levi's hand and offered to wash my jacket for me while we went back to practice. I gladly accepted and handed her my jacket. We went to clean the blood off of our hands before heading back down the stairs and Pixis walked up to us with a disappointed look on his face.

"Oh here comes the lecture," I heard Levi mumble.

Instead, Pixis just came up, put a hand on Levi's shoulder, and said, "I hope your string of bad luck ends before the mission tonight."

"I hope so too," Levi said, glaring at me a little.

Pixis just nodded and headed back to the rest of the group giving Levi a pat on the shoulder before he went.

"I'm sorry I won't give you any more shit," I said slipping my hand into Levi's. "You actually really scared me when I saw how much you were bleeding."

"I'm fine, you can stop with the worrying," Levi rolled his eyes but leaned his head on my shoulder for a minute. "I am glad you are going to stop being a little shit though," he said and I felt the urge to talk back but I held my tongue.

Instead, I just said, "Well for today at least."

He just rolled his eyes and walked towards the rest of the group pulling me along by my hand which he refused to let go of.

"Alright, everyone ready?" Pixis asked, looking at us. He smiled a little when he saw us holding hands. I think he's just glad we aren't "fighting" anymore.

"If you can even call it that," Levi mumbled under his breath. "It was hardly a fight."

I know right, I was just being a dick for the hell of it, I thought trying not to laugh.

"We're ready," Levi said giving him a nod.

"I'm ready," Petra said.

He nodded and handed me the flashlight. "Alright, we are going to do the rest of the test before seeing if Petra can make a tunnel big enough for the whole team as well as if Levi can keep it covered," Pixis said.

"Okay we're ready," I said and he had everyone back up again we were about to start when he spoke up.

"Hold," he said before walking up to me. "We need to figure out a way around the light so look for that while you are down there, we are going to do this test run with the lanterns turned off up here while you go down so we can see just how much you can see the lights up here."

"Okay, will do," I said, making sure to keep that in mind. He had everyone turn off the lanterns and I noticed that we are going to need the light on for the above-ground entry too.

"Shit," I mumbled before looking up at Pixis who was nothing more than a silhouette in the dark but I knew he must've had a similar realization when I saw his silhouette's hand pinch the bridge of his nose.

"I will come up with a way to work around this too, but this first run is just a basic test," I called over to him as I turned on the flashlight. That should buy me a little more time. The last thing we need is him pulling the plug on this mission.

"Alright," let's do the run through then," he said with a hesitant sigh.

We went down and covered it over. I could see a lot better in here and it was easier to see where the dust particles were when Petra and Levi moved them around. "Alright Pixis come stand over the tunnel," I yelled out of one of the holes.

"Be ready," I said to Levi as I heard Pixis walking over.

I knew the second Pixis stepped on the tunnel cause it started to cave ever so slightly before Levi moved his hands. I could tell he started holding it up. Well, that answers one question. No, the tunnel will not stay up by itself so yes every time someone walks over it Levi will have to hold it up.

"I figured as much," he mumbled.

"Well, that's one thing figured out we just have to figure out what to do with the light and what to do with everyone else." I sighed.

"I mean the light has an on and off switch, so that solves half of the trouble," Levi shrugged.

"And when the light is on is when we are making the tunnel and when we are moving inside the tunnel," Petra noted. "Why don't we just make the holes last instead of at the beginning?" She suggested and I had a hard time following.

She saw my look of confusion and told me to the point the light at the roof of the tunnel where there wasn't a hole. "We have Levi cover us with a solid hole and then when you turn the light off I make the holes by picking little spots with my fingers and quickly turning where I want the holes into gas particles and then quickly back into a solid particle. It would stop everyone from breathing in the gas particles and it would give us holes to breathe. The only issue is having everyone hold their breaths for an extra few seconds," she explained.

"I mean I think it will work but we have to check if everyone else is okay with that," I nodded. "Now I just have to figure out how to hide the light like while we open the first tunnel."

"What about having Erwin mask it with the portals? Ya know like he hid us when we did the other recon mission?" Levi suggested.

"That only worked because of the trees hiding where the portals were. In the open desert, it will be very hard to hide," I sighed.

"Well, I'm sure we will figure something out, besides we still have time we still aren't even sure if we can pull this off fully yet so while we figure that out you think more about the light issue yeah?" Petra said, patting my back.

"Okay," I nodded. Levi opened the tunnel back up and I walked over to explain the things I did figure out to Pixis while Levi and Petra got the others filled in with their ideas.

"So we are still figuring out the light issue for the first part but the rest of the light issue has been fixed?" He asked double-checking.

"Yes. I just need a little more time to come up with something," I said and he nodded.

"Okay, I believe in you, but maybe we should also see if the others have any ideas?" he suggested.

"That would be great, we need all the help me can get with this one," I nodded. We walked back over to the rest of the group.

"We will be taking a short break to let Petra and Levi catch their breaths while we all brainstorm this issue," he said having everyone take a seat so we could discuss this.


	59. Tunnel Practice

We all sat on the floor in a circle and started brainstorming ideas. While we were sitting I noticed Hanji come down the stairs with my jacket which was now cleaned off and she gave us a confused look.

"Was I supposed to be down here too?" she asked looking at Thomas.

"No you're good," Pixis laughed, "he was down here to help in case they got stuck underground. He would help us communicate with them easier."

"Oh alright," she laughed before taking a seat anyway, "I might as well stay in case there are any more injuries," she said looking to Levi who just rolled his eyes.

"I don't want to talk about it," he mumbled.

"Well that's perfect you can help us brainstorm through this issue," Pixis said.

"I actually have an idea," Marlowe said quietly, "well that is if you aren't opposed to adding another person to the team."

"If their power can hide the light, and they agree to be on the team then by all means," Pixis nodded.

I already knew who he was going to suggest I felt myself mentally facepalm for not thinking of her sooner. I was just trying to use the teammates we already have. I didn't even think about adding another person to the team.

"I mean Hitch's power will work perfectly for this, I can go see if she's okay with joining," he said and Pixis nodded. He ran up the stairs and we all waited for him to come back with her by his side or with a no.

They both came down and she gave us a big smile, "I'd love to join the mission," she said happily.

With Hitch on the team, it had me worried that Petra was going to have to do even more work to make the holes even bigger. We were already unsure if she could manage it with the team we had but adding an extra person adds more strain on her powers meaning we will need to take a lot more breaks during the mission.

"Alright let's see how this is going to work," Pixis said standing up and everyone got up with him.

"Do you think you can make a hole big enough for the whole team and actually be able to move?" Pixis asked Petra. I guess he was worried about actually pulling this off too.

"I should be able too, but I don't know for how long," she said with a nervous shrug.

"Well, guess we'll just have to test it out. I know you can do it though," Hanji said, giving her a pat on the back. "I mean you've moved around tons of walls, this isn't much different right?"

"I guess it's not," Petra said, a little more confident. "You're right, I can do this," she nodded. The whole team followed her lead as I walked over to Pixis. Thomas and Hanji stood back with him as the rest of the team all got closer together preparing to start the practice mission. "Just let me know when you are ready," she said looking over at me.

I nodded before turning towards Pixis to see what he wanted us to try. "Start whenever you're ready, but just do it as if it was the real deal," he said and I nodded.

"I'll be seeing how well Marlowe's power works under the ground. I will also be checking to see if Petra gets tired too quickly." I said and Pixis nodded.

"Just keep me updated," he said before turning to Thomas. "We're ready."

"Okay, I'll connect you two," Thomas said and I imagined the room in my mind as I heard Pixis's thoughts in my head.

Good luck. He thought to me and I smiled at him.

Thanks, we will need it. I turned and headed back towards the group. I gave everyone the okay and Pixis turned out the lantern on the other side of the room. We were in complete darkness.

I tapped Hitch on the shoulder and she made a cover for us. She tapped me on the shoulder to let me know it was safe. I turned the flashlight on and saw her power at work. Her power made us and the light look like we weren't even there to anyone outside of the small radius. I could see the radius as the light rather than fade into darkness it ended abruptly.

I gave Levi and Petra a nod and they started opening the hole. I looked around at everyone and brought my shirt up over my nose and mouth to signal to everyone not to breathe in the "dust" particles as they started moving around.

Once the hole was big enough and deep enough for everyone to fit in, we needed to drop down into it without making a sound. I quickly looked at Levi who gave me a nod. He held all the particles back and out of the way while I used my powers to make everyone as light as a feather while they jumped into the hole. I did this by tapping them on the shoulder and then gesturing for them to jump. At first, they were confused but when they saw the first person jump in without making a sound they realized fairly quickly what I was doing.

Once everyone was in the hole Levi moved the particles over our heads leaving a few holes in it as Petra solidified it. We turned the light out and I tapped Hitch on the shoulder to let her know she could drop her power for the moment.

Everyone settled down in the hole and I gave them a small rest as I filled Pixis in. We are in the hole did you see or hear anything? I thought to him

Nope, nothing at all. It worked!

The hard part was far from done. We still had to figure out how to tunnel which now that Hitch is here it should be easier to block out the light without covering the holes and making everyone hold their breath every time we want to move.

Let's test Marlowe's powers first. Pixis thought.

"Marlowe," I spoke up, "can you see anyone above?"

"I can see Thomas, Hanji, and Pixis," Marlowe said.

"I'm going to have them back up tell me when you can no longer see them," I said and he nodded.

I started thinking to Erwin to have them back up they backed up for a few minutes until Marlowe finally said, "I can't see them anymore."

How far away are you? I asked

I would say anywhere from 75 to 100 feet, Pixis said giving me a rough estimate.

That's better than what I thought he could be able to see, but I doubt he could see clearly that whole time.

"Okay good," I said smiling at him. "Lastly we are going to practice tunneling," I said and everyone nodded.

We worked at if a few hours taking breaks hear in there. We took a long break for lunchtime and did one more quick run-through before dinner. I think we are just about ready. We didn't make very many mistakes to start and all the mistakes we did make weren't anything that would get us caught instantly.

After dinner, we were all exhausted. We had to go to bed early for the mission anyway, but none of us were complaining. We all needed the rest. Levi and I headed to our room. When we hit the bed we had to fight off falling asleep almost immediately. It didn't help that Levi's exhaustion was also making me more exhausted and vice versa.

One thing I am happy about is that Levi's bad luck seems to have gone away at least for now. We didn't have another incident all day unless you count him tripping over his own two feet on the way up the stairs, but I think it was just from exhaustion rather than bad luck. Especially since he caught himself before he fell.

We got ready for bed before laying down and cuddling up next to each other. "I love you," he whispered, wrapping his arms around me. "Even though sometimes you're a pain in my ass," he laughed.

"I love you too," I laughed before laying my head on his chest and closing my eyes, "especially because I can be a pain in your ass."

"Smartass," I could almost hear the eye roll with his tone of voice.

"I know you love it."

"You're right I do, even if it is a little annoying," he said and I felt as my exhaustion started to take me as the world around me faded away as I drifted off to sleep.


	60. Desert Recon Mission: Part 1

I woke up to someone lightly shaking my arm. I slowly opened my eyes and saw someone standing over me. "It's time for the mission hun," Hanji said and I sat up. "I'll let you wake Eren up, I'm going to go wake the others," she said leaving the room.

It took me a minute to remember why Hanji was the one waking me up for the mission. She wasn't even going on this one. Then I realized she's probably standing by in case of any injuries.

I woke Eren up and I could tell he was still really tired. "Did you not sleep at all?" I asked and he shrugged.

"No matter how tired I was I just kept waking up," he yawned.

"Are you going to be alright for the mission?"

"Yeah, I just need to get ready, that should wake me up a little." He didn't sound too convincing. We needed him at his best this is probably going to be one of our longest missions which is why we woke up extra early. Rather than going around 3 in the morning, as usual, it's only midnight.

We got dressed and headed to the common room where Pixis, Shadis, Nanaba, and Hanji were waiting for us while the rest of our team slowly trickled in until everyone arrived.

We all lined up and started getting ready. We put our masks on and looked at each other. "Alright Erwin open a portal," Eren instructed and he did just that.

Eren was about to walk through when Marlowe tapped on his shoulder, "Maybe I should go through first and make sure there's no one around?" he suggested.

"Actually that's a good idea," Eren said, stepping back and watching him disappear through the portal he walked back through a minute later.

"Not a guard in sight, I think we're far enough away," he said and Eren nodded.

"Alright everyone through the portal," Eren said and we all walked through one by one.

Erwin closed the portal behind us and we all took a moment and let out our eyes adjust to the darkness. It was a little easier to see each other than we thought the stars and moon in the night sky helped us make out the outlines of each other. It was only because we were standing so close together, but other than that we were looking at a pitch-black open area. We could barely make out anything else in front of us.

I looked over everyone's thoughts to see how everyone was doing when I saw a perfect few of our surroundings in Marlowe's thoughts. I closed my eyes and just looked into his mind. That's right I forgot that he also has night vision. I was mostly focusing on his power to direct heat signatures.

"We all need to stick together," Eren whispered.

"We should all hold onto each other," Armin suggested, "as we did at the other recon mission."

"And Lookout should lead since he has a perfect view of the surroundings," I threw the suggestion out there.

I heard Marlowe's thoughts as he got a little nervous about everything relying on him as he mumbled, "not a perfect view."

"Well you're the only one who can see right now," I said and he looked around and realized everyone else was pretty much either staring off into space trying to locate each other's voices or they were just staring at the ground.

"Speaking of seeing, Ghost, be careful you're about to back into a cactus," he warned as Armin tripped over his own two feet falling backward. He quickly used his power to phase right through the cactus.

"Ouch," he whispered, "that's for the warning or that would have hurt a lot more," he said as Marlowe helped him up. He unphased his hand so he could help him as his body was still phased through the cactus and partially into the floor.

We all got in a line and held on to each other's jackets Marlowe was leading the way Eren was right behind him than me then Petra then Hitch then Armin then Ymir and Lastly Erwin. We walked until Marlowe stopped us. At the very edge of his vision, he saw two guards. They were walking and they didn't seem to have spotted us yet.

"Blinds cover," Eren whispered.

We all got closer together as she whispered back, "cover is set."

Eren hesitantly pulled out the flashlight and he clenched his eyes shut as he turned it on. "Don't worry they can't see anything, but we might wanna hurry in case they decide to walk straight through us," she whispered.

Eren looked to Petra and me and nodded, "start tunneling," he said and we got straight on it. Petra opened a hole and I started moving all the particles. The guards got closer and closer and I realized Hitch wasn't joking there was a chance they might walk straight into us.

We picked up our pace and when the hole was deep enough Eren lifted us in it one by one. He was the last one in and the guards were nearly on top of us. I quickly covered the hole and Petra solidified it. Eren turned the light off and everyone stayed deadly still as they walked directly over us. I could feel their weight as I held up the roof of the tunnel so it wouldn't move under their feet or cave in on us.

"Can you believe they have us guarding this stupid place still," a man's voice came thought clearly.

"Quit your complaining and pay more attention," the other man said.

"Oh come on you and I both know that if there was going to be an attack here it would have already happened. One of the men stopped directly above us. Shit, they are heavy.

"Still, we should be doing our jobs regardless of if people are going to come attack or not." I could feel the annoyance radiate off them as they spoke. Their thoughts screaming, why did I have to get stuck with this moron.

"Yeah, but still I was really looking forward to fighting some cursed, could you imagine I would be a hero taking down 5 cursed at once! Instead, I'm just watching these pathetic weaklings stare at the walls all day."

I felt anger rise up in me and even the others. This fool thinks that because the blue badges he's guarding are "weaklings," that he can take us on. As if. The only reason they aren't fighting back is that they've been tortured and have had all the fight sucked right out of them. Not to mention they aren't even part of the exiles they are just normal civilians. Most of them weren't ever going to fight back, to begin with. I just hope this jackass is working the day we do raid this place I would love to smash his smug little face in.

I felt Eren's hand on my shoulder. I turned to look at him even though we were in the pitch-black darkness. I heard his thoughts tell me that it's okay. I guess my anger must be radiating off of me because looking at not just Eren's thoughts everyone was telling me to calm down in their heads. I took a quiet calming breath as they started walking again.

"Stop wasting time we have to get to our positions, we are late for the shift change because of your nonsensical ramblings."

"Sorry sorry, I'm just saying, it would be really fun. I don't know how those idiots at camp Bravo didn't kill more of them. I mean they only managed to shoot one blue badge and a few red and greens I heard the blue badge they killed wasn't even that strong just some memory powers or something lame they couldn't even stop one of the stronger people. What losers how could they miss that many people escaping?" Their voices started to fade out as they walked further away.

I felt myself start shaking. It took everything I had not to pop out of the ground and strangle that man right here and now. How dare he talk about Ilsa like that. She was stronger than any of these asshats who think they are tough shit.

"Babe," Eren whispered softly. He put his hand in mine and I could feel how much he was shaking too. He is as angry as I am yet he's holding it in for my sake.

I took another deep breath and forced myself to calm down, "we will make those bastards pay during the raid," I said letting his hand go.

I heard Ymir's thoughts pop into my head before disappearing almost on purpose. Those fuckers will rot. I'll make sure of it. I will-. They cut off there and I knew she was trying to hide something from me. As long as she doesn't do anything reckless.

I could feel everyone's anger but the one that surprised me the most was Petra's. She wanted to hurt them. The thought went by so quickly I almost missed it. For a split second, she thought about using her powers on that jackass but instantly pushed the thought away. I've never felt Petra this angry, and I've definitely never witnessed her have a violent thought like that before.

"Let's push forward," Eren said through tense muscles and a clenched jaw.

We moved as far as we could before stopping for a break. We were still about half a mile out, but Petra needed to stop for a moment, her arms were burning and she started getting very dizzy.

"I just need a few minutes," she said, closing her eyes and trying to steady herself as she started to get a mild case of vertigo. It only gets worse from here. A few breaks will help, but for how much longer? There's only so many breaks that will work before it's nonstop. Then what? We don't know the severity of her backlash this is the farthest we've got is vertigo. We never even knew her arms would start burning and itching like that. She's never used her power to this extent before.

"Everyone get comfortable, we will be taking a 20-minute break," Eren said and everyone looked at him surprised, myself included.

"I only need a few minutes," Petra said quickly.

"No, you need more than that if we are going to continue as far as we are.

"Do you need a break?" Eren asked, turning to me, "I can try and take over for you for a little bit."

As much as I wanted to tell him no I knew I couldn't. He's right if we are going to do this mission we need to take longer breaks than normal. "Okay, but let me know if it starts being too much on you," I said, holding it up a little longer while he got the gravity correct for the ground. I felt him take over and let go. I felt relief wash over my sore muscles. It was like holding a giant weight above my head as it slowly got heavier and heavier. My arms already ached but not enough to quit now.

We had discussed switching out and tested it out during practice earlier if someone walks over us he just has to make a gravity field that only affects the ground and makes it stable enough for people to walk over but the gravity fields take a lot more out of him then him affecting the gravity himself.

We settled in and Marlowe let us know when it was clear to whisper amongst ourselves and when it was time to be quiet. We weren't even halfway there and the main objective of the mission hasn't even started yet. This is going to be a really long night.


	61. Desert Recon Mission: Part 2

After the 20 minutes went by I could feel Eren struggling a little to hold everything in place. "I'm ready to take back over," I whispered. He nodded and I took back over. Petra gave him a nod and we continued making our way towards the camp. Every once in awhile we would have Ymir ask a spirit if we were going the right way still.

She seemed to be a lot quieter today when talking with or about the spirits. Usually, she would tell us who is around and helping, or they would make themselves known in some way, but this time she wasn't even thinking about who was helping us. Maybe she and her guardian spirit got in a fight? Can that even happen... Probably, I mean Ymir is very stubborn. I don't know all I know is I can feel the awkward tension coming from her.

We only took one more 45-minute break between the last one and when we reached the camp, but that's only because we pushed ourselves to keep going through the pain. I could feel both my pain and Petra's and when we finally reached the camp and Eren took over I felt so relieved.

My arms were aching and throbbing. I was dizzy and there was a searing pain in my muscles. I definitely overdid it this time. When Eren fully took over and I was able to let go I had to stop myself from blacking out. I was shaking and sweating and Eren looked at me and I felt his worry pour into me.

"I'm okay," I whispered trying to catch my breath.

Petra was in pretty bad shape too. She was exhausted, nauseous, and suffering from severe vertigo. That was just the mild stuff that we already knew could happen, but we've gone into the unknown territory and discovered some more backlashes for her.

Her arms had stiffened up and were hard to move almost like they solidified and locked into place. I'm hoping this backlash isn't permanent, but no matter how many times I told her not to push herself she insisted on pushing forward. She kept saying "we're almost there," but her thoughts showed the truth. She was punishing herself for not being there to help us free Ilsa. She kept thinking she deserves the pain if it will save people's lives in the end.

As much as I wanted to stop her I didn't feel it was right to bring this up in front of everyone, when we get back home from the mission I have to check in with her, or at least have mom or Hanji do it. She might talk to them more.

While the others set up for the mission and got a little plan in motion about how long everything will take and how Armin can find the hole when he's ready to come back I turned to Petra. I had her lay her head in my lap and I used the last bit of my energy to push so much exhaustion on her that she fell asleep. She needed the rest and she was practically begging for the world to stop spinning.

Eren looked over at us when they finished there plan and saw her sleeping and gave me a nod. "She needs that right now," he said smiling at me. "So do you."

"You're not getting rid of me that easily," I said. It would have sounded more convincing if I could keep my head up.

I guess in the end I did end up dozing off. I woke back up at the end of the mission when Armin came back. Eren shook my arm and told me to wake Petra. "How long were we asleep?" I asked as Petra woke up.

"About an hour or so," he shrugged.

"Is it time to go home?" Petra asked as she yawned quietly.

The others just all looked at each other before Eren let out a disappointed sigh. "There are too many guards here to portal out, do you think you two have a little more tunneling in you?"

I could tell how much Eren hated to ask that question, but I knew he wouldn't ask it unless he needed too.

I looked over at Petra it's her call. I can do it, I might face some consequences later, but right now she's the one already struggling with backlash. The stiffness in her arms has lessened but hasn't completely gone away.

"I can do a little more," she nodded, "besides, we've come this far haven't we. No point in giving up now."

I just nodded along. We tunneled a little further away and right as Marlowe gave us the all-clear I felt a sharp pain in my arm. If I wasn't looking at it I would have sworn I had just been stabbed. I silenced myself biting down on my lip staying quiet. I didn't want to give away our position. I let my one arm fall to my side as I help up the dirt with just one hand. I don't think I can keep this up much longer or the same thing will happen to this arm.

Eren noticed something was up and quickly took over for me without a word. He looked worried and watched as I quickly tried to apply pressure to where the unbearable pain was, it hurt so much to apply pressure, but I knew it needed to be done.

Erwin opened a big enough portal for us to crawl through and we each did one by one. Petra and I were sitting in the back as everyone went through neither of us able to move our arms. Hers was too stiff and numb to support her weight and mine was in too much pain to even think about trying. Before Erwin went through Eren gave him a nod.

Before I could even think about looking to Eren for help I felt something wrap around me. Vines? Hanji! I saw her hand and head sticking through the portal. She pulled me out and moved out of the way. I didn't have time to even think about what was happening as Pixis poked his head into the portal and the next thing I knew Petra came out in one of his force fields. They set us down on the ground and turned back to help Eren finish the last part of the mission.

Have I ever mentioned just how grateful I am that these guys stay awake and on standby in case of emergencies? Eren came through next telling them to quickly put the dirt back in. I looked over at the pile of dirt that was there from when Erwin portaled it away at the start of the mission. Just enough to fill the hole back up and make it look like nothing ever happened. Pixis dropped it in and Erwin closed the portal before it could all spill back out.

With the portal closed and the mission officially over Eren ran over to me to see what happened. Hanji and Pixis also came over to see if both Petra and I were alright.

Hanji took a look at Petra and could feel her arms wouldn't budge almost as if they had turned solid. "There's nothing I can do besides monitor this and hope it goes away," she mumbled.

Petra nodded and thanked her anyway. It's almost as if she expected her to say that.

"What happened there?" Pixis asked, a little worried about both of us. I was surprised he actually let an emotion show.

"Just some major backlash," Petra took the words right out of my mouth.

Hanji looked over my arm and scoffed, "Major indeed you have a grade 2 muscle tear." she said and I looked down and could already see some discoloration.

"Can you heal it?" I asked.

"I already tried too. Usually, I would be able to, but I'm assuming that this is caused by your powers backlashing. That's why my power had no effect.

"What does that mean?" Eren asked and Hanji shook her head.

"It means he's out of commission for the next two months... maybe more."

"What? No!" I heard myself say before I could stop myself. "I'm scheduled for the other recon mission as well as one of the raids."

"Hun, you're not going to be able to use that arm normally for a long while."

"I have another arm!" I argued.

"Babe now's not the time to be worried about missions now is the time to worry about yourself." I felt Eren's arms wrap around me. I could feel how worried he was.

I was going to keep arguing cause like hell were they benching me for the missions, but Pixis cut me off before I could start back up. "Eren's right. We will discuss what to do later, but as for now you just need to get some rest."

Nothing more was said as they helped Petra off the floor and back to her room Eren helped me up. He wouldn't let go of my hand the whole walk back to our room. He was dead quiet as he stared at the floor.

We got in the room and I had enough of his thoughts."For fuck's sake stop blaming yourself," I rolled my eyes.

"I'm the one who had you guys keep going," he whispered.

"We would have kept going either way, besides we did it. We completed the mission without being spotted."

"Yeah, but at what cost? Petra might never be able to move her arms again, you are injured to the point you can barely move your own arm. It wasn't worth it." He plopped down on the bed, his eyes still glued to the floor.

"Are you fucking serious. Of course, it was worth it, even Petra will tell you that. Do you know how many lives we will save with this information?"

He just stayed quiet. "I don't care about the damn information right now. The love of my life got hurt because of it," he yelled before going really quiet. "I know it's selfish of me but I would rather us never go on a mission again than see you in that much pain unable to do anything about it."

Eren was really worked up about this. I stopped trying to argue with him and just sat down next to him and leaned my head on his shoulder. "That's the same way I feel every time you overuse your power on a mission."

"I'm sorry I never realized," he mumbled.

"Well one thing is for sure," I said and he looked up at me. "We're both idiots who make the other worry."

He just let a little smile slip onto his face, "ah true love," he said sarcastically.

I let out a little laugh and felt as my body screamed at me for sleep. Before I could even suggest we lay down I noticed a figure standing in our doorway.


	62. Nightmare

"Jean?" I asked recognizing him instantly. His head was down and he wasn't looking at us. Levi looked at me for a moment and back to Jean.

"Is this a bad time?" He asked and I could hear how shaky his voice was. He's crying.

I jumped up and ran over to him. "What's wrong?" I asked and Levi was right behind me.

"I-I don't know if it's real or not," he rushed out quickly.

"If what's real?" I asked walking him in the room and having him sit on the edge of the bed.

He was panicking and not making much sense. He just kept repeating, "I don't know if it's real or not," over and over again. He was struggling to keep the air in his lungs.

I looked up at Levi to see if he knew what he was so freaked out about but Levi just looked at me wide-eyed and shrugged before mouthing. "Way too many thoughts at once for me to comprehend."

"I hate doing this without permission," I heard Levi mumbled before taking a deep breath.

Jean's breathing started to calm down and his muscles relaxed a little. "Sorry about that, but we couldn't understand a word you were saying," Levi explained as Jean looked up at us finally back in touch with reality.

"I don't know if it was just a nightmare or not, but now my adrenaline is going too much and I can't tell," Jean said through deep breaths.

"What was your nightmare?" I asked and he looked down at his hands.

"It wasn't just my hands anymore. I couldn't feel anything anywhere. It was my wedding day and Marco kissed me and I didn't feel a thing. He placed a hand on my cheek and asked me what was wrong but I didn't feel it either." When I woke up I tried touching my face but I still couldn't feel anything and I don't know if it's my mind playing a sick fucking joke on me or if it's real," he said his breathing starting to pick back up.

"Okay," I said calmly, "if the reason is that your adrenaline is going then you need to calm down so we can figure it out okay?" I asked, keeping a calm tone. I was going to try and hold his hand to calm him down but I stopped myself realizing that would probably make things worse since he can't feel his hands.

"You're right," he said taking a few deep breaths. His eyes darted around the room to try and focus on anything else.

"What happened to you?" he asked looking at Levi's arm that was put in a makeshift sling.

"Backlash," Levi mumbled.

"Idiot didn't let me take over for him," I mumbled.

"So you both are complete idiots," Jean rolled his eyes trying to keep his breathing normal.

"Hey you are just as much an idiot as we are," Levi raised an eyebrow.

"I never said I wasn't," he rolled his eyes, "I am well aware that I am an idiot, but at least I own up to it."

Now that Jean was calm and wasn't paying attention to his own body I decided now was the best time to test it out. I placed a hand on his shoulder and his head whipped around to look at my hand. His face was mixed with shock and relief. "It was only a dream," I said, giving him a smile.

He let out a deep breath and looked me in the eyes, "It felt so real," he said closing his eyes and looking down at the ground. "I was so scared, I didn't know what to do and I didn't want to wake Marco."

"I know," I said, pulling him into a hug.

"I think that's a little late," I heard Levi mumble before looking up and sure enough Marco was in the doorway. I let Jean go as I felt panic fill my chest.

I wanted to know how much he heard. Is Jean's secret out? If he didn't hear that much then what does he think? Surely he has questions.

Jean just stayed quiet as Marco walked in with a confused look on his face. "What wrong? What's going on?" he asked and I let out a little sigh of relief. He doesn't know, but what are we going to tell him?

"Jean had a really bad nightmare and knew you were tired and didn't want to disrupt you. He figured we were still awake so he came to us," Levi said. I swear that man has the best lying face I've ever seen, well when he's not lying to me at least.

"Oh hun," Marco said walking over and placing a hand on Jean's cheek. I watched as Jean smiled feeling Marco's hand. I think that's exactly what he needed after his nightmare. "You know I don't mind if you wake me up." He said before placing a kiss on his head. "Do you want to talk about the nightmare?"

"No, it was just something stupid, they helped me realize just how stupid it was," Jean said and Marco nodded.

"Okay, well are you okay to head back to the room?" he asked and Jean nodded. Marco helped him off the bed. He turned back to us. "Thank you," he said looking to both of us before walking to the doorway. He paused and turned back around before looking at Levi. He looked at Marco and whispered something.

Marco made a giant ice cube and Jean walked it over to Levi before giving him a nod, "hope this helps," he said before turning and leaving with Marco.

Levi just shrugged and wrapped the giant ice cube in a cloth and held it to his arm. He winced a little but I could see his muscles relax a little.

"We should head to bed," I suggested and he nodded.

"I'm wiped," he yawned.

"I hope Jean's okay," I mumbled as we both crawled into bed.

"It's only normal that he's having nightmares about it. I mean he still hasn't come to terms fully with what's happening. It's only normal that he's scared about it both consciously and subconsciously."

"Yeah, I know, but still I've never seen him more scared than these last few days."

"I'm sure he will be fine, he has us to help him through it."

"That doesn't make me feel any better," I said and Levi rolled his eyes.

"I wasn't done." He said before clearing his throat and repeating his statement. "He has us to help him through it... and when that inevitably fails he will turn to Marco who is 100 times more capable of helping him through his issues and come to terms with it."

I couldn't help but laugh, "Okay now that does make me feel better, and it sounds way more accurate." I laid my head on Levi's chest being extra careful of his arm on the other side of him.

"I'm not fragile you don't have to act like imma break if you touch me," he rolled his eyes.

"I know that, but I don't want to hurt you. I can tell you're already in a lot of pain cause any time you move even the slightest bit you wince."

"I'll be fine," he sighed, "you'll see when we wake up I'll be good as new. I bet I'll even be good enough to be cleared for the next mission."

"You're not going on the next mission," I sat up and looked him in the eyes.

"And you're not going on the mission without me," he said determinedly. "We made a promise, dangerous missions we go together or we don't go at all," he said and I shook my head.

"This isn't that dangerous, and besides you need to rest we can't have you using your powers and screwing up your arm even more."

"No, what you really me is I can't be holding you guys back," he glared at me. "I won't I was serious when I said I have another arm. I won't move a muscle in my bad arm, but my powers are still strong enough that with one arm I can help more than I will hold you back," he said. I know it's true, but there is no way anyone else will allow this.

"Pixis will never clear you... scratch that Hanji will have your head on a stake if you even attempt it."

"I'll deal with them, but you remember our promise. If you break that promise I will be beyond angry," Levi said and I knew he meant it.

"If it comes down to it and they don't let you on the mission I'll stay back too," I said and I could tell that's not what he wanted to hear. He wanted to hear me say I'll make it so that we both make it on the mission, but I would rather risk someone else leading the mission rather than risk his health and break our promise.


	63. Convincing Everyone

I woke up and felt a lot better, but also a lot worse. My arm was so sore. When I sat up pain shot through me. This is going to be a bitch to deal with. I looked at Eren who was still sleeping. I slipped out of bed and headed to find Pixis. I had to convince him that I was okay for the mission. If Eren isn't on the mission then I just know it will go to shit. He would rather throw the whole mission away than keep me on it, but if this mission gets screwed up then both of the raid missions are screwed.

I headed straight to his office. I saw Shadis and Nanaba were in there with him. They were going over our mission notes. I stood in the doorway waiting to see if I could get his attention. He looked up and nodded. I could tell he already knew why I was here.

"Could you excuse us for a moment," he said, dismissing them so we could speak.

They walked out of the room as I came in. He gestured for me to take a seat and I did just that. I was careful to manage my expressions. Even letting a single wince out might guarantee that I am benched from the mission.

"Alright convince me," he said and I didn't even need to ask what he meant. He skipped straight past any excuses and small talk.

"Well, Eren is going to throw the mission," I said leaning back in the chair.

"What do you mean he will throw the mission?"

"Well, we made a promise that if one of us goes on a mission then so does the other one, we made it for dangerous missions, but recently all of our missions are dangerous."

"I am well aware of your promise," Pixis nodded.

"Well, if I am off the mission Eren is off the mission. He's already told me that he would keep our promise rather than go on the mission without me."

"How does that equal to him throwing the mission?"

"You and I both know that without Eren's quick thinking that mission is doomed. We don't have a concrete plan for that one and he is the only one skilled enough to think up a plan on the spot that guarantees everyone's safety."

Pixis stayed quiet but I could tell he was thinking about what I was saying. He and I both know that I'm right, but I don't think it will be enough to convince him.

"Besides that," I started again, "you and I both know that even with just one good arm I am more useful on the mission than off."

"How so? Who's to say you won't injure our other arm?"

"Because I know my limits. The last mission was an exception. I knew I was going way over my limits. I planned for that, maybe not to this extent, but to a point where I might have to step back. The next mission will be more inside my power's comfort zone."

"You say that, but you will only beat half of your original strength, meaning will it really be within your comfort zone or will you overdo it again trying to keep up with the others?"

I could see why he was so hesitant to let me on the mission, but he and I both know that this is well within my ability. "I won't slow the others down or hold them back," I said flat out. There's no need to beat around the bush with the actual question he wanted to ask.

"How can we know for sure?"

"Let me prove it during practice. If you don't like what you see then you bench me," I said and he let out a sigh.

"I bench you then we have to plan a whole new mission cause then both you and Eren are kicked out." He said and I shrugged.

"Knowing you if you kick me out it will be within the first 10 minutes of practice. Which leaves you and Eren plenty of time to pull together a new team."

"You have a point there, he mumbled while nodding. He thought everything over and let out a frustrated sigh. "Fine." he rubbed at his temples, "I can't believe you actually talked me into this. "Hanji's going to kill me." He said before his eyes went wide. "Ms. Magnolia is going to kill me." He said with even more fear in his voice.

"If you can talk Hanji into it I can talk mom into it," I said trying to ease his worries.

"Yeah how?" He asked looking at me.

"Well, honestly I was just planning on taking the lecture for you. I doubt there is anything else I can do to make mom accept this."

"Great," he sighed, "same from Hanji. At least Hanji's lectures are shorter," he mumbled.

"Well at least you only have the one lecture," I sighed.

He gave me a confused look and I realized that it didn't dawn on him that Mom won't be the only one pissed at me.

"Mom and Eren," I shrugged.

"Oh," he finally realized. "I'm not sure which one's worse there," he laughed. "Ms. Magnolia's lecture will definitely be long and draining, but Eren... you might be sleeping in one of the spare rooms for a while."

"Tell me about it," I laughed.

"Now if you excuse me," Pixis said standing up, "I've got a lecture to attend."

I smiled as I followed him out of the room. "As do I."

"God Shadis is going to kill me for this," I heard him mumble.

"Looks like I'm not the only one in a dog house," I laughed.

"That's two totally different things," he said defensively.

"Is it?"

He just stopped and stared at me for a moment before I shrugged, "it's none of my business, now if you will excuse me I have a lecture to attend," I said, throwing his sentence back at him as I headed back to my room.

I walked in just as Eren was sitting up. He looked around the room before locking eyes with me. "You're already dressed? Where are you going?" he asked before realizing I was coming in the room rather than leaving. "Or I guess I should ask what did you do?"

I could already tell he knew exactly what I left to do, he was debating whether to be angry or not depending on what Pixis's answer was.

"You already know," I mumbled.

"What did he say," he asked, his voice had a hint of frustration in it.

"You're not going to like it," I mumbled back.

"Say it," he said glaring me down. Damn and he thinks my death stare is horrifying he should look in a mirror.

"He said I could go on the mission if I prove I can do it during practice."

Eren didn't even wait for me to finish my sentence the second he heard me say I could go he jumped out of that bed and pushed right past me out of the door.

I caught up to him and grabbed his arm, "where are you going?"

"To yell at Pixis. He was supposed to tell you that you're benched. He's such reckless lunatic I swear I'm gunna-"

"Babe please wait,"

"No, he and I are going to have a little talk and when I'm don-"

"Eren please!" I raised my voice finally getting him to look at me. "Can we talk about this before you go and rip his head off? If you're going to be mad at anyone be mad at me."

"Oh I am mad at you and I will deal with you later, but right now I have to deal with Pixis."

"No right now you need to listen to me," I grabbed his arm once more this time with my bad arm so he couldn't just shake it off again.

"Let go."

"No, we are going to talk this out like adults. If you don't follow me back to the room I will use my bad arm to drag you all the way back."

He just glared me down, "that's really toxic," he mumbled as he marched back to our room.

"What's toxic is you trying to get mad at Pixis for something I started," I said following after him.

He plopped down on the bed and crossed his arms. "Fine, make this whole thing okay, convince me not to murder you both," he said looking me dead in the eyes, "you have five minutes."

"You're giving me a time limit?" I asked, staring at him. He can't be fucking serious.

"Yup. Now you better start convincing me cause time's ticking."

"Hold up before you start the time you better make me a promise," I said and he raised an eyebrow. "When you set your mind to something you don't change it. You are a stubborn bastard. You have to promise to have an open mind."

He let out a big sigh, "fine, but your time starts now," he said staring me down.

"Okay, but not here," I said and his eyes narrowed.

"Put your braces on."

"What the hell? Why?"

"Just trust me," I sighed. This is the only way I could think of to convince him. I know he won't listen to words right now so this is my only option.

I helped him put his braces on and we walked out of our room. On our way to where I was taking Eren, I saw mom walking towards me. She definitely heard the news. Shit that is the last thing I need right now. I bumped into Hanji, Shadis, and Pixis. It looks like Hanji just finished lecturing him and Shadis was staring him down about to start his lecture. They all looked up and saw me walking and instantly turned to come talk to me. Probably to talk me out of this. Well, ya know what if they all want to yell at me they can follow us and I'll prove it to them too.

We made it to the sparring area and I heard Eren scoff. "I'm not going to fight you while you're like this. If this is your only way to prove it to me then you've wasted your time."

"No, we are going to spar, cause you won't listen to anything else so here we go." We needed to start the match before the others caught up with us.

"I'm leaving," Eren said and I rolled my eyes before using my powers to drag his ass into the circle.

"No, let me prove this to you." He shook his head and started to walk out of the circle. Everyone finally caught up to me so I did the only thing I could think of. "I win I get to go on the mission."

"At your best, it's a gamble who would win, like this it would be a slaughter," Eren shook his head.

"Okay if you feel that way then let me finish. If I win I get to go on the mission. If I lose I sit off of it no more arguments. I'll even let our promise slide this once and you can go on the mission without me." I said and Eren stopped walking and turned back around.

Everyone in the room was quiet. No one expected me to say that. Hell, I didn't even expect to blurt that last part out. I was going to sit off the mission if I lost, but let him go alone, that came out of nowhere.

"Does that sound fair?" I asked, trying to stop my voice from shaking. I didn't even want to make that last bet, but here we are.

"You better not hurt yourself more," he said, shaking his head.

"I'm trying to prove that I won't," I nodded.

"Then fine," he let out a long sigh.

I nodded and we both got in position. I can't lose. Eren is a determined son of a bitch, but so am I. "Pixis can you count us down," I asked.

This was going to be an interesting match. Eren is still in sweats and a baggy shirt that he slept in with crazy bedhead. I'm fully dressed but have one arm in a sling and don't have any of my knives on me.

"Okay," he said, walking a little closer. "three... two... one... spar!


	64. Spar to Settle a Wager

The second the spar started I jumped back knowing that Eren was planning on throwing me out with a gravity field. Sure enough, that was his first move, however, his second move was putting one behind me as well. Guess he knew I would be reading his mind to figure out what his plays were. He focused purely on the one gravity field so I wouldn't see the second one coming.

I almost got thrown out of the circle but I instantly used my powers to pull Eren close to me and grab his arm with my good hand and swing him towards his own gravitational field.

He instantly dismantled it and pushed away from me. He was glaring me down thinking that it was a dirty trick but everyone else around me had to admit that it was a smart play. It was my only play, with me only being able to use half of my power's normal strength it was about all I could manage.

I could see the cogs in Eren's head-turning. I didn't want to give him another second to think. I used my powers quickly pushing emotion onto him trying to throw him off his game. I saw his eyes start to water but nothing else seemed to work. He stood his ground. Gravity flipped and before I could flip with it I got pinned to the ceiling. My other power stopped with my concentration meaning Eren was no longer getting held down by emotions either. Fuck this isn't good.

I saw another gravity field start to appear right behind me. Shit, this really isn't good. This isn't the first time Eren's done this move, but it's the first time I don't have enough power to fight against it and he knows it.

Eren's going to release the gravity and the second he does the gravity field is going to send me flying out of the circle. I only have one chance at this. The second he releases the flipped gravity I need to overwhelm him and pull him all at once before getting thrown out. Normally I would only stick to pushing certain emotions on people, especially knowing how bad some emotions can affect some people, but in this case, I have no choice.

This isn't a normal friendly duel where it doesn't matter the winner. We are both going all out. Neither of us can afford to lose. I have to win this even if it means doing something I know would affect Eren in a bad way. I'm sorry, but I have no choice.

The very second I felt gravity start to drop I stared Eren straight in his eyes and set as much panic and anxiety to him as I could. When I saw his eyes widen I knew he was caught off guard and I used my power to throw him into his own gravity field and send him flying out of the circle.

I was still getting thrown by his gravity field, but as long as he was out of the circle first that was all that mattered. I heard the sound of Eren hitting the floor and I looked down and saw that the same fate was coming for me.

The floor was coming up fast. I didn't have enough time to move my power from where it was focused on Eren to stop myself from hitting the floor. My other arm is useless at the moment. This is going to hurt. I closed my eyes just before impact only to open them and see that I was still floating about the ground.

As I swiveled around to my feet I looked over at Eren who was laying on the floor a few feet away from me. I could tell the anxiety and panic I used did a number on him. He was hyperventilating, his whole body was trembling and his nails were digging into the palms of his hands, but he still managed to catch me.

I ran over to him and quickly pushed a calming feeling over him. I won, but at what cost. This wasn't worth it. Seeing him like that, feeling him like that is the last thing I want. He's going to hate me. That was such a dick move. I know that he already struggles with anxiety attacks and I used that against him for what? A promise that I wagered to get him to listen to one of my outrageous ideas.

"Asshole," he mumbled when he was finally able to take a deep breath.

"I know I'm so sorry." I was a moment away from telling him that I will stand back from the mission just because I put him through that. I won, but by playing dirty it's not a way I want to win ever, especially not against Eren.

"Don't be," he sighed sitting up, "You won, you proved you could do it," he looked up at me and nodded. "Even if you did play a little dirty to do it. However, fighting dirty isn't always a bad thing. This is war, we need a little more of that in the field. We need to be willing to do anything to win." he nodded before letting out an annoyed sigh. "I hate to say it, but you convinced me," he rolled his eyes and looked at everyone else.

Hanji, Shadis, and Pixis were dead quiet. I could tell they were convinced as well, Mom on the other hand was shaking her head. "I still don't like the idea of you going out there injured." She finally said and everyone turned to her. She let out a soft sigh before continuing, "but I know there is nothing I can say that will stop you. So all I will say is that you better make it back safely because if not I will go there myself and die trying to kill the sons of bitches who hurt my kid," she said before walking away without another word.

"To be fair, he should be safe, that was him fighting against another person who has powers most of the assholes they will be avoiding don't even have those," Hanji yelled after her. I couldn't tell how she felt about what Hanji said she had her back to us as she walked away and she was too far away for my powers to reach her.

"Alright, well I guess it's decided," Pixis nodded. "Levi's staying on the mission."

"Seems like it," Shadis mumbled. I could tell he still wasn't too crazy about this decision, but he knew he was outvoted in this matter.

"You two, go get dressed in your costumes and meet us for practice, I will go grab the others," Pixis said before walking away.

Eren and I headed back to our room and the whole way there I felt so guilty. He was just silent and thinking about how practice was going to go, but I still felt like an asshole. I don't care if he thinks it was necessary that I did that, I took advantage of something I knew he struggled with for personal gain. Nothing about that sounds necessary, let alone something you should do to the one you love.

When we got to our room and got changed I finally got up the courage to apologize for it. This time more sincerely than just a ushed I'm sorry.

"Eren, before we head to practice can we talk?" I asked sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Sure, what do you want to talk about."

"The match just now, I'm really sorry about-."

"Hey look, don't sweat it. I know you had to," he cut me off and gave me a smile.

"But Eren, I feel really bad about it. I shouldn't have-."

"Look, I know that you feel like it was a shitty thing to do, but trust me it's not that bad. I'm fine and you know I don't hold grudges."

I raised my eyebrow at that last part. He is one to hold a grudge.

"Okay okay, maybe not that last part," he laughed, "what I mean is I don't hold grudges against you. Not about something as stupid as this. It was a sparring match we both went all out and you did what you had to to win, nothing wrong with that. That's what those sparring matches are supposed to be. Just because we never actually do them that way doesn't mean I'm mad at you for doing them the way they were intended," he said, placing a kiss on my cheek.

"But still it was a dick move."

"It was, but hey I would prefer that then getting hit with another one of Jean's fireballs." he laughed. "Besides, a part of me is glad you won. I would hate for us to break a promise over a stupid spar that was pretty unfair, to begin with."

"Is that why you let me win?" I asked.

"Yup," he said with a smile. "In all seriousness, no you did that yourself."

"But you did throw the match a little," I said and he looked at me a little confused. "I mean it might not have been intentional but you did. You kept your attacks basic. Normally you would be thinking harder about how to strategically throw me out, but this time you were just brute-forcing it which is never your style."

"I guess I figured because you were weaker I could get away with it, but I'm going to be honest I think I was just too frustrated that I wasn't really thinking that much. My only thought was that I had to win to protect you. For a moment I even thought about fighting dirty. Which is why I don't blame you at all for doing what you did. I was going to do it myself too."

"Oh really?" I asked. I wasn't watching his thoughts for the last bit of the match since I was too busy trying to figure out a way out of his hold that I guess I must have missed this thought.

"Yeah, I was going to put a gravitational field by your bad arm and when you were distracted by the pain I would throw you out of the circle, but last minute I decided that was too much of a dick move. I realized that if I wanted to protect you so much then why would I purposely hurt you."

"That would have been a dick move," I nodded.

"I guess we were both too worried about winning that stupid match that we both didn't care if we hurt each other."

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"Hey don't be sorry. At least your way didn't directly cause me physical pain. Well not intentionally," he shrugged, "just promise me that neither of us will be so hellbent on winning a spar again that we go that far."

"I promise," I nodded.

"Good, now let's get to practice before Pixis thinks about kicking us both off the team," Eren suggested and I nodded.

"We don't want that, after fighting so desperately to stay on," I laughed. We got up and started heading to practice.


	65. Practice Leads Nowhere

When both of us walked up to practice I could see the concerned faces of everyone. I had to admit I was just as worried as they were, but Levi is sure he can pull this off. He beat me in the spar then surely he can pull off this mission. I'm just hoping that he didn't waste all his energy on the spar.

"I didn't," he whispered to me.

Pixis addressed everyone, "good morning. It's time for practice. I know all of you are probably confused by Levi being here." He let out a sigh knowing their reactions before he even broke the news to them. "He is still on the mission."

"What the fuck," Ymir yelled.

"That doesn't seem like a good idea," Armin mumbled.

Erwin just rubbed the back of his neck and shook his head knowing it wasn't his place to question this decision.

"I know you all probably have your questions and concerns, however, Levi is confident he can keep up with you all on the mission. He's even proved himself by beating Eren in a sparring match using only half of his normal powers," Pixis said, catching everyone up.

"We aren't worried that he's going to hold us back," Ymir rolled her eyes, "we are worried that he is going to hurt himself even more. He got injured because he kept pushing himself when he needed to rest and he's doing the same thing now." I watched as she glared at him down. Normally he would stand his ground and look her in the eyes as she glared, but his eyes were towards the ground and his head lowered almost as if he was trying to hide from her glare.

I couldn't tell why right away, but after a few minutes, I realized what was going on when I felt Levi's worry hit me. He was afraid that she was right. That he might end up hurting himself more if he's not careful. He knew he needed rest, but he kept pushing himself to continue.

A part of me wanted to tell him that everything will be alright and he will do just fine, and the other part of me wanted to tell him I told you so. I didn't do either. I just took a deep breath and placed a hand on his shoulder drawing him out of his own thoughts. I gave him a smile and a nod before moving my hand down to hold his good one.

"Thanks," he mumbled.

Pixis had us start practice and we were all mostly still blind about the plan. All we had was don't get caught which was pretty much a given. I did have Hanji try out some things with her vines to see if certain things would work. I had pretty much everyone try their powers out in some way to see if certain things would work.

I had Hanji make a bunch of vines and Levi moved them around and mold them into the shape of a bush or tree, that didn't really work like it thought it would, she was able to make a bush just fine but the bigger it was the more out of place it looked. The "tree" if I could even call it that looked nothing like it; it just looked like a giant pile of connected leaves.

I had her try a few more things. One of the things that I wasn't expecting to actually work, but did was that she was able to make a net out of vines that actually was quite sturdy. I don't know if it will be helpful in the mission at all, but who knows at this point we are all just firing in the dark.

I also tried to test just how much Levi can do seeing where his new limits were, but they weren't as accurate since he already wasted a good chunk of his energy on the spar earlier.

I also tested out Hanji and Erwin powers together if he puts portals all around like he did in the other forest and Hanji blocks some of them with leaves it could work as a cover for a short time. It can't be long-term cover since it doesn't look the most natural, but its definitely something we can use in a pinch.

I tested out a few things for my powers too, but nothing really helped with what we were going to do for the mission. After hours of just shots in the dark Pixis finally called it. "I think this is about as good as we could have expected from this." He sighed. I could tell he was just as disappointed as I was.

"So we are just going in blind," Erwin asked.

"Pretty much," I nodded, "but as long as I have knowledge about what your powers can and can't do I should be able to come up with something on the spot once I figure out the terrain," I nodded. Hopefully.

We all headed out of the training area. When I walked up Jean and Marco were waiting for Levi and me.

"What's up?" I asked walking up to them.

"We were going to spar and we needed someone to watch," Marco smiled.

I looked at Jean who looked like he was going to start sweating bullets. "Okay I can do that," I said looking at Levi who also nodded with me. As we were walking I looked at him again and he gave me a nod.

Okay, so it isn't my imagination. Jean is losing his shit. He's probably worried about using his powers again after the last time. Either that, or he's worried about Marco finding out about his backlash.

We made it to the sparring area and they walked into the circle. Jean hesitated before stepping in. We stood outside the circle and waited for them to get ready. They both gave us a nod and I watched as Jean closed his eyes took a deep breath to try and calm himself before calling out that he was ready.

We counted them down and watched them fight it out. They were both being a lot more methodical about everything. This match was dragging on longer than any other I had watched. I thought Marco was going to win a few times, but then Jean looked like he might win a couple of times. They were pretty evenly matched and were both trying hard to knock the other out without hurting each other. Jean looked like he was going to push Marco out with a wall of fire, but Marco countered by blocking it with a wall of ice.

All of a sudden Levi rushed in the circle and broke them up yelling, "Stop the fight."

"Why what's wrong?" Marco asked, dropping everything.

Jean froze and looked down at his hands before looking up at Levi. I realized what was happening just as I followed Jean's eyes.

Levi quickly covered for him, "Jean your adrenaline must've been too high cause I know you didn't feel it at first, but I know you can definitely feel it now," Levi said, giving him just enough time to fake a pained expression before Marco turned to him.

"I think we went a little crazy," he said trying to catch his breath and faking a pained expression. "I burned my hands," he winced showing Marco. He was horrible at it and Levi must have been thinking the same thing because his pitiful fake pain looked like it turned real after a moment. My eyes drifted over to Levi who was pinching his own arm to push the emotion onto Jean while he was out of Marco's view.

"Oh my god are you okay babe?" Marco asked running over and looking at his hands. While Marco was looking Down Jean glared at Levi, "don't worry the pain isn't that bad, I'm sure Hanji can help me out," he said.

"I'll take him to Hanji," Levi offered.

"Okay," Marco nodded. "We shouldn't all crowd Hanji thought. You two go Eren and I will be waiting in our room," he said giving Jean a kiss on the cheek.

"Okay thanks, babe," Jean said before they walked away. Levi don't leave me with Marco. How am I supposed to lie to him? Levi just gave me a sympathetic look before following Jean to go find Hanji.

Marco and I headed to his room and we sat on the bed waiting for them to come back. The room was quiet and awkward when I heard Marco let out a sigh. "Am I going crazy or is something going on with him?" He asked. Great how the fuck am I supposed to answer this. I don't want to lie to him, but at the same time, I promised Jean.


	66. Horrible Couple

"Am I going crazy or is something going on with him?" Marco asked. I internally panicked. I didn't know what to say.

"I haven't noticed anything," I shrugged.

Marco let out a frustrated sigh, "so you are in on it,"

Shit he knows, but what does he know. Does he just know that somethings going on, or does he know exactly what is happening? I didn't know what to say so I just stayed quiet and kept my head towards the ground. "What are you talking about?" I asked trying to keep it up even though I knew doing this was useless.

"I don't know exactly what's going on, but I know something is going on. I know you and Levi are in on it because Jean keeps going to you guys almost nightly. I know it has something to do with why he keeps burning his hands," he said before looking at me. "Am I right?"

I didn't say anything, I just stayed staring at the ground. This isn't good, he's going to figure it out. I can't say anything he knows when I'm lying, but if I don't say anything he'll know he's right because I'm not talking.

"So I think it's safe to say that by your silence that I'm heading in the right direction," Marco sighed. "Does it have something to do with why he's doesn't noticing some things? Like why he doesn't recognize when I'm holding his hands, or why he doesn't touch me anymore, or why he's pulling away from me." I could hear the staring in Marco's tone as he continued. This was causing him pain to think about. He knew this whole time something was going on, but we kept it from him. He's suffering just as much as Jean is.

The room went quiet and he asked me straight out, "Did he hurt his hands or something? Mor specifically did he like loose feeling in them?" He asked and I felt my head shoot up on its own. As my eyes locked with him I knew I made a mistake. He instantly knew he was right.

I forced my eyes back to the ground and I felt my hands go up and cover my mouth. I fucked up I just told Marco. I mean I didn't tell him, but I told him.

Marco let out a big sigh before saying, "so that's a yes. I thought that's what it might be. Jean's been acting really weird and I figured that's what was going on before I asked him to spar. I only asked him because I wanted to see if he would do anything different and he did," he let out another sigh. "I feel bad I led him to get hurt. I should have just asked him, but instead, I wanted to make sure I wasn't just imagining it, and now he's hurt himself again and it's my fault."

"It's not your fault," I said looking up at him. "You didn't know for sure, and he should have told you. I told him he should, but he is so far in denial he's still trying to pretend that everything's normal," I sighed. I mean I can't blame him I wouldn't want to accept that either.

"But still I should have expected that if he lost feeling then he also lost his warning sign too."

"Warning sign?" I asked.

"When he's getting close to his limit his hands would start to hurt before getting burned. Now he can't feel them hurt to know that his backlash is about to start."

It took me a moment to realize that. I didn't even think about that when they started the spar.

I heard Marco stop talking as he looked up towards the door. Jean and Levi both walked into the room.

Marco walked up and I saw Levi's face change. He knew Marco knew. He looked at me and I just shrugged. Hey, I didn't tell him he figured it out by himself.

He walked up to Jean and without a single word whacked him upside the head. "You should have told me," Marco glared at him. Jean took a second to process what just happened before looking at me.

"You promised you wouldn't-." Before he could finish his sentence Marco shook his head.

"He didn't say a word, I figured it out before the spar," Marco let out a little sigh. "Still babe you should have told me." He put his hands against Jean's face and started caressing his cheeks. Jean lifted his hands and it looked like he was going to put his hands on top of Marco's but he hesitated before dropping them back to his side.

Marco leaned in and I could barely hear him whispered, "Everything will be okay. This isn't the end of the world. You don't have to treat it as such. You can feel this right?" he asked and Jean nodded.

"Yes I can," he said his voice was shaky.

Marco let go of Jean's face before standing next to him and linking their arms together at the elbows. "Can you feel this?" he asked.

Jean nodded and looked down at where their arms were.

"Well if you can't feel me holding your hand maybe we will just walk like this instead?" He asked. 

Jean's eyes brightened up and he looked up at Marco and nodded. "I'd like that," he said.

"See, you should have told me about this sooner, I can't fix it, but I can find smaller solutions to help," Marco said, placing a hand on Jean's cheek before pulling him in for a kiss.

"I didn't know how to tell you," Jean mumbled.

"You can tell me anything, okay baby. Don't ever feel like you have to walk on eggshells around me."

I looked at Levi and gave him a nod. This is all cute and all, but now I feel like we are interrupting something. I was going to try and slip out without a word but the second I went to stand up Marco and Jean both turned to look at me. Shit did I interrupt their moment?

"Now don't get me wrong," Marco continued, "I'm sure Eren and Levi did a fabulous job of helping, but just know you don't need to hide anything from me." Marco looked at both of us and nodded his head, gesturing for us to come over. "We are all here for you, whether you like it or not." Right as Marco said that he threw his arms around Jean before motioning for us to do the same.

Levi and I just smiled and joined in on the group hug. "Damn right," Levi said.

"You're stuck with us," I said before playful giving Jean a kiss on the cheek.

Marco just laughed and ruffled Jean's hair while Levi rolled his eyes at us. "I swear your boyfriend's going to steal my boyfriend one day," he joked with Marco.

"Honestly I'd like to see them try," Marco laughed. "I'd give it a week before they are either at each other's throats or so hopelessly lost without us that they get themselves killed."

"A whole week?" Levi shook his head, "you're being awfully generous. I'd say 2 days and that's being nice."

"Hey, I think we would make a damn nice couple if we wanted," I rolled my eyes. I mean we are best friends, how hard could anything else be. I mean I love Levi and I know Jean loves Marco and we won't change our boyfriends for the world, but I can't help but be offended that they think so little of us.

"Exactly. I think if we really wanted to we would be the best couple ever," Jean mumbled.

"Oh really," Levi and Marco both said in unison.

"With how you two nearly kill each other at least once a week from petty arguments," Marco started.

"Or with how you both will start fights just to piss the other off nearly daily," Levi added.

"Or how about-," Marco started again.

"Alright, alright, we get it," I laughed. "We would make a terrible couple."

"Though if you think about it the make-up sex would-be killer," Jean said and I just stared at him for a long time not sure if I should be disturbed or agree with him.

"You two would take hate fucking to a new level," Levi laughed.

"Good thing that will never happen," I shook my head.

"Don't lie you wish you could get some of this," Jean winked at me.

"I'd rather Mikasa set a building on my head," I rolled my eyes.

Marco just looked on in horror at us, "you guys sure have the same sense of humor I'll give you both that," he laughed.

"Hey is anyone getting hungry?" Levi asked.

"I'm starving," I said. We skipped lunch to keep practicing even Pixis told us we should get some food, but Levi and I insisted on staying back as well as a few others to work on our powers.

"I think dinner should be arriving soon if it hasn't already," Levi said and everyone nodded.

"We could eat," Jean said after looking at Marco and nodding.

We all headed out and sure enough, they were just coming back with dinner. We sat down and ate hanging around the dining room for a few hours as we just talked with everyone. After I let a yawn slip Jean stopped talking before starting up again but rather than finishing the conversation he suggested we head to bed.

"Anyway, we should let you guys get some rest," Jean said before looking at both Levi and me. "You have a mission tomorrow night and you're going to need all the rest you can get. Especially with your fucked up arm."

"What Jean means is we wish you good luck on your mission tomorrow," Marco said elbowing Jean's arm.

"Sure that's what I meant," he laughed awkwardly.

"Sure you did," Levi rolled his eyes.

We wished them goodnight before getting up and heading to our room.

"I'm glad Marco finally knows," I mumbled.

"Me too. Jean needs the support right now, and Marco is the best to give it to him."

"I think so too," I said as we started getting ready for bed. We have to get up early to try and get some more practice in and plan before going on the mission.


	67. Whispers in the Dark

I woke up in a cold sweat. I thought I heard someone calling my name but when I woke up and looked around the dark room only Eren and I were in here. I could have sworn... that felt so real, but then again so do most dreams.

"You okay?" Eren asked sitting up with a yawn. How did he wake up? Was he already up? Oh shit, I'm hyperventilating.

"Hey it's okay baby, breath," he whispered wrapping his arms around me. I leaned my head on his shoulder and just took a few deep breaths.

"Sorry for waking you up," I said when I finally calmed down.

"It's alright," he said, running his fingers through my hair. "Did you have a nightmare?"

"I'm not quite sure. I don't remember my dream all I remember is that I thought I heard someone calling my name. It didn't even feel like I dreamt it either. I really felt like someone was standing in here calling my name."

"Maybe someone was," Eren said and I looked at him. "Maybe we should talk to Ymir tomorrow?" He suggested.

"Maybe, but how would I hear a spirit? I mean we've never been able to hear them before."

"I mean there are stories of people hearing ghosts all the time."

"Or maybe when they were alive they could-," I stopped talking. Now I really need to talk to Ymir. One of three things is going on, either I'm going crazy, I suddenly developed the power to hear the dead speak, or Ymir is hiding something from us.

"They could what?" He asked.

"Nothing, I just realized how crazy that sounded before I said it. It was nothing. I think I'm just hearing things," I laughed it off. I don't want to tell him what I'm thinking until I know I'm right.

There was a knock at our door and we both looked up. "Are you guys awake?" We heard a voice whisper.

"Yeah," Eren said and the person came into the room. Speak of the devil. Now I know I'm not going crazy. Either Eren is right and sometimes normal people can hear the dead, or I'm right and- I just have to see.

"Ymir, we actually wanted to talk to you," Eren said surprised that she was the one at our door. I'm not at all surprised.

"Sorry to check in so late I just wanted to see if anything weird was happening tonight, someone told me I should check in here," she mumbled.

"Who," I asked, looking her dead in the eyes.

"Isabel," she said and I narrowed my eyes as she avoided my gaze. I did hear a female voice calling my name, but it wasn't Isabel's. The way she's avoiding my eyes, her thoughts are trying to stay away from anything I can read, and she hesitated saying the name. She's lying. I have to be right there is no other way.

"So what did Isabel say," I said emphasizing her name to let her know I'm calling her on her shit.

"She said you were having a nightmare and to check in on you," she mumbled.

"Ymir, Levi actually heard someone call his name could it have been Isabel?" Eren asked and Ymir's eyes went wide. She blinked a few times and gave an awkward smile.

"It could have been," she said awkwardly.

Oh cut the shit Ymir. I thought before looking at Eren. He still is pretty clueless. "Hey do you mind if we talk outside for a moment," I said to both Eren and Ymir.

"Oh go ahead," Eren said. He thought I needed to talk to Ymir about Isabel. I don't think I should tell him just yet.

"Um sure," Ymir said. I could tell she already knew she was in deep shit. We walked out of the room and I glared her down.

"So who was it really?" I asked already knowing the answer.

"I don't know what you're talking about, I already told you it was Isabel," she said, still avoiding eye contact.

"You know the other day when we were on the mission I thought you were acting strange, but I didn't question it. Now that I think about it for a while now you've been acting strange. It started a week or two after Ilsa died." I said and I watched her whole body tense up. "I'm only going to ask this once and I want an honest answer," I said and I watched as she closed her eyes. "Is Ilsa around."

She stayed quiet for a moment and didn't say anything before giving me a silent nod.

"Why didn't you tell anyone?" I asked. I could feel myself getting frustrated. Didn't she think it would be good for people to know that hey the person we cared about who died in front of our eyes is still around watching over us? I tried to stay calm to let her answer maybe she had a good reason.

"Everyone needed time to grieve."

"What does that have to do with telling everyone?"

"Well, if I tell them hey she's still around some people hang onto that, and when she does decide to move on then what? Then people are stuck in denial. People get mad at me for letting her go. People get mad at her for leaving people get mad in general. They don't know what else to feel because they never got it all out to begin with." She let out a long sigh, "I always make sure to wait a while before telling people someone is around after they passed so they have time to deal with their emotions. They have time to figure out how to live in a world without them so that when I tell them she is around they don't expect her to stay forever."

I guess she had a point. The main reason I was so frustrated with her not telling me now is that I had to go through the grieving process. It hurts, but it is necessary. "So she's been around this whole time?"

"Not exactly. She took two weeks to find me. She was very confused at first which isn't totally uncommon, but it was jarring for her since for the first time ever she couldn't remember what happened.

"Wait, do people's powers not work after they are dead?" I asked. That was the main reason I figured it was Ilsa was because she had telepathy powers.

"Not really. I mean they can get them to work every now and again, but then that zaps a lot of their energy and they end up disappearing or recharging for long periods of time."

"How long?"

"Anywhere from a few days to a few weeks, depending on how much they managed to use. Unless they are connected to me then it zaps my energy really quickly."

"So she did use her power to contact me?" I asked.

"No," Ymir shook her head, "sometimes ghosts can generate enough energy to actually do things like make noise, speak, and move things. She actually did it all on her own she didn't use my energy to do it. I think she knew because I was trying to hide her still."

"Then why did she go get you if she was trying to keep her contacting me a secret?" All of this spirit stuff confuses me.

"She thought she gave you a panic attack or something since she said you looked really scared."

"Well, I mean it's not every day you hear a dead person call your name," I let out an awkward laugh. "So wait she wanted to talk to me?" I asked.

"She wants to talk to everyone, but mostly you and everyone else who was on your team for the mission."

"The mission that got her killed," I whispered, closing my eyes only to feel a smack upside the head. I opened my eyes to ask Ymir what the hell that was for only to see her with an equally as confused expression.

"I never knew you were one to hit people," she said looking just past me. I looked behind me and saw nothing but an empty hallway.

"Ilsa?" I asked.

"Yeah," Ymir whispered. "That's what she wanted to talk to you all about. She wants to let you know that you shouldn't blame yourselves. You tried your best to save everyone. You saved a lot of people that day. I'm not mad or upset that I happened to be one of the casualties. I don't mind because even being dead is better than the torment they put me through, and now I get to look over all of you and watch you win against those bastards," Ymir said. It sounded like she was repeating it word for word with all the pauses she took to let Ilsa speak.

I didn't want to argue with her since she could probably haunt me for the rest of my life if I pissed her off, but I wanted to tell her how much we all miss her and that we are sorry we couldn't save her. I wanted to tell her how much I would trade places with her if I could, have her be alive with the others, but I knew that would just anger her.

"I miss you, but I'm glad you are watching over us."

"She also says she's not going anywhere anytime soon." Ymir laughed before finishing what she was saying, "she says we need all the help we can get."

"She's right," I laughed.

I saw a figure appear at the end of the hallway and I nearly felt my heartbeat right out of my chest and my blood runs cold. It took a second but then I recognized the silhouette. "Oh, it's just Christa," I mumbled out a sigh of relief.

Ymir turned around and gave her an awkward smile and a wave. "Sorry I'll just be another minute Angel, go back to bed," she said and Christa nodded and went back in the room.

"Angel," I said raising an eyebrow at her.

"Sorry but not everyone wants their nicknames to be as basic as babe or baby." She said, staring me right in the eyes.

"What's that supposed to mean," I asked, feeling a little offended.

"It means you're a basic bitch," she said before walking away, "we will talk more tomorrow but right now I have to go back to my little angel," she said walking down the hall as I just stared at her in disbelief. Did she really just call me a basic bitch. The nerve. I walked back into the room and looked at Eren who sat up.

"Did you have a nice talk?" he asked.

"Am I a basic bitch?" I asked back, still a little offended by her comment.

"Are you a what," Erena asked, unable to hold back his laughter, "just what the hell were you talking about."

"Nothing, never mind let's just go back to bed," I said crawling in being careful of my arm as I scooted into place. "I love you," I paused for a minute, "sexy... man," I said and Eren sat up so fast.

"What the actual fuck," Eren laughed. "Seriously baby what is going on?" he asked and I just rolled my eyes.

"Nothing forget about it," I rolled over and closed my eyes.

"Oh no you don't," he said wrapping his arms around me. "Even if your in a salty mood we are still gonna cuddle," he said his lips kissed at the back of my neck until I decided to roll over and face him.

"I love you too babe," he whispered in my ear before laying his head on my chest and closing his eyes.

"Fuck her," I shook my head, "we don't need any fancy nicknames," I mumbled.

"What has got your panties in a twist," Eren opened his eyes and looked up at me.

"Nothing, Ymir's just a bitch sometimes," I mumbled.

"Aren't we all," he laughed, "now let's get some sleep before we have to get up and do that stupid practice again."

"Okay," I smiled. I placed a kiss on the top of his head before closing my eyes and letting myself fall back asleep.


	68. Infectious Doubt

When I woke up I got ready and woke Eren. "Practice time," I said gently waking him up.

"Don't tell me we missed breakfast," he groaned.

"Nope, we have time to grab some before practice," I laughed.

"Thank god I'm starving," he said sitting up with a yawn.

I tried to help him put on his braces, but I couldn't get them tight with only one arm. "Just leave them off," Eren let out a frustrated sigh.

"You aren't going to practice without your braces," I raised an eyebrow at him.

"I won't but I don't want to miss breakfast fighting with them. I can have Erwin or Pixis help me with them," he said tucking them under his arms as he headed towards the door. He turned back to look at me, "You coming?"

He asked and I rubbed the back of my neck, "I need help," I whispered not wanting to admit it.

"With your jacket?" He asked.

"And my knives," I sighed. Normally I would just use my power but I need to save up as much energy as possible for practice.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Eren asked, walking over to me.

"Nevermind if you're just going to question me the whole time I'll do it myself," I rolled my eyes and was about to try and fix my costume myself.

"Don't be stupid, let me help you," he said putting his hand on my shoulder and turning me to face him. "I was just making sure that you still think this is a good idea. If you can't even get your clothes on properly-."

"I can, I just want to make sure I have all my energy saved up for practice, and maybe I just wanted my boyfriend's help," I said staring at the ground.

"Okay," I'm just making sure," he said helping me pull my sleeve over my fucked up arm. After he zipped up my jacket he placed a kiss on my forehead and gave me a big smile. "Besides I like it when you need my help. You almost never let me dote on you," his arms wrapped around my waist and he started kissing my neck before whispering how much he loved me in my ear. As much as I wanted to let him continue we needed to get to practice.

"If you keep that up we might end up skipping breakfast," I mumbled and he let out a frustrated sigh. Normally I would say screw breakfast, but I'm too hungry to say that today," he laughed before letting go of me. He helped me get all of my knives in their proper places before we headed out into the hallway.

Right as we were walking out we ran into Pixis. "Oh I was just coming to make sure you two were awake," he laughed.

"Yup we're up, and hungry," Eren laughed.

"Alright, see you both at practice," he said, turning back around and heading towards the stairs to the practice room.

"We're going to have to eat fat," I said and Eren nodded.

"You don't have to tell me twice," he shrugged.

We ate breakfast and saw Jean and Marco come out and get some too. "We can ask them to help with your braces since it wouldn't be the first time they've had to help you."

"Yeah, Jean knows how to put them on almost as fast as you do," Eren nodded. We finished eating before asking Jean for help. He quickly helped Eren put them on before giving me a piece of his mind. The whole time he was helping him put the braces on he was questioning my abilities and if this was smart-me actually going on the mission.

I just sat there quietly and pretended I didn't hear him. If he wants to talk shit he can do it out loud in front of everyone else rather than just in his head like a coward.

I know he has good intentions and is just worried about me, but I can't help but be a little upset that he's doubting me this much. Like yes I know I am not at full strength. I was sure I could do this. I had so much faith in myself, but now with everyone questioning me, they have me second-guessing if I really can do this. Their doubt is infectious, even Eren is struggling to believe in me. He's trying his hardest but his doubt is clouding my judgment.

"Levi, you ready?" Eren asked, snapping his fingers in front of my face getting my attention. "You okay? You looked like you were zoning out there. Are you still tired or something?" He asked.

"Or something," I mumbled back shaking my head, "sorry I was just lost in my thoughts I'm all good. Let's head to practice, we don't want to keep them waiting on us."

We headed down to practice and saw mostly everyone there. It looks like we were just waiting on Ymir and Armin now. I wonder if Ymir slept in after last night.

Armin came down the stairs and now we were just waiting on Ymir. "Did anyone check to make sure she's awake?" I whispered to Eren.

"I hope so. I mean if Pixis was going to wake us up then he probably woke her up too," he shrugged.

"Yeah probably," I nodded before turning my head back towards the stairs. After another Minute passed Ymir walked down them. I guess she was awake.

We started practice and actually ended this one early. We still weren't able to come up with a concrete plan, but we managed to figure out a few backup plans.

Everyone seemed satisfied with that, well everyone except me and Eren. Eren was upset cause he wasn't able to make any spectacular plans and he felt like he was letting everyone down. I on the other hand was worried without a plan maybe I will just hold the others back. My doubt has been growing since yesterday and I can't shake the feeling now that I'm going to screw something up.

"Hey, you sure you're okay? You look like you're really stressed about something?" Eren asked noticing how spaced out I looked.

"I'm fine I'm just worried about the mission. I-" I stopped myself right there. I can't tell Eren that I'm doubting myself. If I do that he might tell Pixix and get me kicked off the mission.

"I am too," he whispered. "What if because I wasn't able to come up with a plan screw something up?"

"You aren't going to screw anything up." I on the other hand might. I thought to myself.

"Easy for you to say. No one is looking for you to have all the answers."

"No one is saying you have to have all the answers Eren, they just trust your skills."

"And I let them down today."

"No Eren, you didn't let anyone down," I ran my fingers through his hair, " No one thinks that baby. If they did I would beat the shit outta them."

I just shook his head, "beat the shit out of them with what your one good hand."

"Hey just because you're pissy doesn't mean you can attack me," I said playfully.

"Sorry," he laughed. He leaned his head on my shoulder and closed his eyes. "So why are you worried about the mission then if it isn't for lack of planning?"

Ya know what fuck it. I hate feeling like I have to hide stuff from him. If he tells Pixis then he tells PIxis, but I don't want to lie to him. "I had so much faith in myself that I could pull this off, but now with everyone telling me I can I'm starting to doubt myself and now I'm just worried I will blow the whole mission."

Eren picked his head off my shoulder and looked me in the eyes with a worried look. Oh shit, here we go.


	69. Convince Me

“I don’t think you have to worry too much,” Eren said, giving me a smile. “If you believe you can do it then I believe you can do it. All that matters is you believe in yourself. Screw what everyone else may think, don't let their doubt drag you down okay. We are both going on this mission, and we are both going to make it through perfectly fine,” he said trying to convince me and himself.

If he can push past his worries and state he will do just fine then so can I. “Yes we will,” I said, giving him a smile.

“There we go.”

The rest of the day went by painfully slow. Eren was an anxious wreck and honestly so was I. We ended up just heading back to our room to wait it all out. Eren started writing in a notebook and I had picked up a book I had read at least 10 times already. I wasn’t even reading my eyes were following the words across the page but I didn’t care to actually read anything.

Eren let out a frustrated sigh before slamming his notebook closed. “This is so fucking annoying,” he groaned.

“Maybe we should just go to bed?” I asked. I mean all the worrying had made us both tired, but sleep just didn’t sound possible.

“No, I’m not that tired,” he paused for a minute before looking up at me, “I mean there’s something else I had in mind that may also involve the bed,”

I looked at him with a smile spreading across my face, “I like where this is heading,” I said looking at him.

“But your arm?” He paused looking down at it, “will it be okay?”

“It will be just fine.”

“Do you think topping will make it easier on you?” he asked.

“Either way is fine I don’t really mind, but I know you want me to fuck the frustration out of you,” I said and his cheeks went red. I noticed something and I cleared my throat before he could respond. “Hey, Mom what's up?”

I asked. Ya know what. Eren was right there is something that can make me embarrassed, it’s this. I know she heard me. God she’s never going to let me live this down.

“Sorry, I was coming to check up on you two. Someone told me you were looking a little down today, but it seems you two are busy. If you do need to talk you know where to find me,” she said heading towards the door. She stopped in the doorway and turned to look back at us. Oh, don’t do it. “It’s only a shame you two can’t make any grandbabies for me,” she said before walking out. She did it. Damn that woman.

“Levi-,” Eren started to say I just flopped back on the bed and pulled the pillow over my face.

“I’m no longer in the mood,” I closed my eyes. Ya know what on the other hand sleeps sounds nice then I can pretend that was just a horrible nightmare and not reality.

“Oh come on baby,” Eren said trying to hold in his laughter. “Whether we do it or not she’s going to think we did. Might as well.”

“If you’re trying to convince me you’re doing a pretty shitty job.”

“Oh, do you want me to convince you?” He asked, and I could almost hear the purr in his voice.

“Maybe.”

The room went silent. For a moment I thought Eren just finished, but that’s when I felt his hands on my hips. He pulled me down on the bed until my legs were hanging off the side. I didn’t know what he was planning on doing. This seems like a weird way to convince me? I couldn’t even read what he was thinking to see what he was planning and doing his thoughts just kept saying oh I’ll convince you.

I felt him start to slide off my pants and I hesitated. I was going to ask what the hell he was up to, but I wanted to see where this was going so I let him continue without saying a word.

I felt his hands on my hip bones before he slid down my boxers. I didn’t even have a moment to process what Eren was doing before I felt his hand grab me and his mouth around my dick.

Well, damn I’m really convinced, but I’m not going to tell him just yet. I moved the pillow away from my face so I could see how cute he looked while sucking my dick. His eyes looked up and met mine as his head bobbed up and down and I nearly came right then and there.

I lifted my good hand and ran my fingers through his hair as he took more of me in his mouth. He let out a pleased little hum that sent shivers down my spine. “Fuck Eren,” I moaned throwing my head back.

A moment later he pulled his head up with a devious smile, “it sounds like I’ve convinced you.” Damn, I wanted him to keep going.

“Damn right,” I bit my lip.

I wanted nothing more than to rip his clothes off and pin him against the bed, but with my arm fucked up I couldn’t exactly do that. I concentrated on my power and pulled his shirt off.

“Guess I did a really good job of convincing you with how eager you seem to be.”

“Just shut up and take your pants off,” I rolled my eyes.

“So we’re in that type of mood today.” He pulled down his pants and boxers before helping me take off my shirt. “Then again I’m not really complaining.”

He straddled my lap and pushed me down on the bed, “Just lay back and relax,” he purred and I felt my dick twitch with anticipation. “I’ll take good care of you.”

He started to grind his ass against me. Every time I was starting to really feel it he would slow down and stop just to get a reaction out of me. Dame Eren and his teasing. Normally I would just flip him over and fuck him till he’s screaming my name, but I can’t do that today. Damn this injury. Then again a part of me doesn’t mind his teasing that much, but I will never tell him that.

“Alright, I’ll stop teasing you, you can stop glaring daggers into me” he laughed. I felt his hand wrap around me before positioning me at his entrance.

He slowly slid down and I felt a shiver of pleasure run through me. “Oh fuck babe.” I grabbed his hips with my good hand. He placed his hand over mine before starting to bounce up and down.

Oh god, his pace is so slow it’s going to drive me crazy. I could tell even he was getting frustrated with the slow pace before he decided to speed up. I started grinding my hips up to match his rhythm. Fuck I’m already getting close. I have to hold out there’s no way I can finish this early without him bragging about being too good in bed. God forbid that happens his pride would be intolerable.

I sat up and started nipping at his neck knowing how sensitive he is there. I was hoping to get him as close as I was. I gritted my teeth and held out as long as I could. It didn’t help that his hands were running down my back, his fingers lightly tracing their way down sending shivers up my spine. Thank god just as I was at my limit he let out a breathy moan, “close baby.”

“Come for me,” I whispered in his ear as I moved my hand down to pump his dick.

“Fuck,” Eren moaned out as he shut his eyes. I could tell he was trying to fight it as much as I was, but neither of us were able to hold on very long after that.

We both came rather quickly after that and collapsed onto the bed. That wasn’t as strenuous as our normal bedroom activities, but it was enough to tire us out nonetheless.

“My legs and hips are going to be so sore later,” Eren sighed. Even though he sounded like he was regretting his choices, his thoughts were telling me it was so worth it.

We got cleaned up and ready for bed before laying down and cuddling up next to each other. “No matter what happens on the mission tonight I want you to know how much I love you,” I whispered to Eren as he laid his head on my chest.

“I love you too.” he said before looking me in the eye and giving me a smile, “You don’t have to worry the mission is going to go perfect,” Eren said, but I could tell he didn’t believe what he was saying.

“I'm sure it will,” I said, not knowing if I believed myself either. One thing is for sure no matter what happens we are going to be there together and that’s all that matters.


	70. Second Guessing

We woke up early for the mission and decided it would be best just to get ready and wait for everyone. At least that was the plan half of our time was spent getting ready. I kept trying to figure out how to help Eren with his braces but nothing was working. Not to mention Eren had a hard time getting all my knives into place.

“We really are a mess tonight aren’t we,” he laughed. I swear Eren tripped over his own pants like three times now as he tried to get his boots on. His laces were all tangled.

“What the fuck are you doing in here rearranging non-existent furniture?” Jean asked as he barged into the room.

“Jean you need to knock first,” Marco said hesitantly following him into the room,

“Sorry did we wake you,” Eren asked a little embarrassed.

“What the fuck do you think?”

“Sorry.”

“So why are you making all the racket?”

I just shot Eren a look. I didn’t want him to tell him because the last thing I need to hear right now is nagging us. He’ll probably say something along the lines of, You can’t even get dressed how the hell are you going to do the actual mission.

“We were just having trouble getting these knots out of my laces,” Eren said realizing I didn’t want him to say much else.

“That’s the only reason?” Jean asked knowing we were full of shit.

“Well, that and I couldn’t get my braces on and I tripped over the lace trying to pull them on,” he laughed. I mean he’s not lying that did happen.

“You guys are hopeless,” Jean grumbled before grabbing the boot from Eren’s hand and handing it to Marco. “You untangle I’ll help him with his braces and then hopefully we can get back to bed without any more issues.”

They got straight to work as I tracked down the rest of my knives. Normally I put them in specific places, but the last few days I haven’t been since usually I do it with my power and it takes too much effort to put them all where they go individually especially knowing I have to grab them again in a few hours. However, I swore I left them all right here, but I guess a few of them got moved.

Marco finished untangling Eren’s shoelaces before walking over to me and keeping his voice low to make sure Jean didn’t hear, “now what do you need help with?” he asked already knowing that I was struggling.

“I can’t find some of my knives, and the ones I did find I can’t get in their proper places because it requires me to use my bad arm,” I whispered back.

“Here, hand them to me and tell me where they go,” Marco said, helping me out. We managed to find and place all but one.

“Thanks for your help,” I said giving up. “I’m sure it will turn up around here soon enough.”

“You sure it’s fine we haven’t found it,” Marco asked.

“I’m too worried about it I’m just worried someone might-”

“Fucking shit,” Jean cursed, “I stepped on a fucking knife,” he looked up glaring at me.

“Step on it,” I finished my sentence even there was no point.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

“I’m fine, just a little cut, just watch where you put those things,” he rolled his eyes, handing me the knife. I handed it to Marco who put it in place.

“See Jean this is why you shouldn’t walk around barefoot,” Marco said pointing down at his own shoes. “Never know what’s laying around,” Marco whispered to me.

“Yeah yeah yeah shut the fuck up, Not everyone is prepared for everything Marco,” he rolled his eyes. “Are you guys set now? Can we go back to our own room before I step on another knife or something else?”

“Yeah, thanks for the help,” Eren said happily.

“Yeah whatever, just don’t get killed tonight,” Jean grumbled. Despite his dismissive tone, he was really worried. Not to mention how he was lying about going back to sleep. He was planning on staying up and making sure we return. Also that he wasn’t sleeping to begin with he was laying wake worrying about how tonight would go. So was Marco.

Glad to know they have such little faith in us. I turned towards Eren after they left and sighed, “so much for our extra free time.” I mumbled realizing everyone else was probably waking up right about now for the mission.

We Headed out into the common area. Surprisingly we were the first ones there. “Wow we beat even Pixis,” Eren said looking around.

“Not by much,” I said nodding towards the hallway where Pixis was just coming from.

“Oh good you two are already ready,” he nodded.

“Still no plan though,” Eren mumbled.

“No worries, I’m sure something will come to you when you get there.” He patted Eren on the shoulder.

“And if something goes wrong just know backup is just a portal away.”

That’s very reassuring. Eren thought sarcastically. Not only does he not believe we can do it but he has people waiting for us to fail.

Of course, Eren would take it that way. Does he not realize they are always standing by even if we have a concrete plan? I just reached my hand out a little and grabbed him. When he turned to face me I gave him a little smile and pushed a calm loving feeling onto him.

“Thanks,” he whispered.

It only took a few more minutes before everyone was here. It seemed we did have a bigger backup team than normal. Rather than just Pixis, Shadis, Hanji, and Nanaba who usually stand by all geared up this time we had Pixis, Shadis, Nanaba, Rico, Mikasa, Annie, and lastly Mom. Who I think was actually there to keep her promise that if something happened to me she would go in swinging.

As we were about to head out I even saw Jean and Marco standing in the hallway in their costumes. God does that many people have so little faith in us. I thought Eren was just being paranoid, but he had a point. They really don’t think we can pull this off. Then why send us in at all?

At this rate, we might as well have been doing the raids tonight with how geared and ready they all were.

This doesn’t help the bad feeling I was having. Maybe this mission isn’t a good idea. Am I going to screw this up? If it’s my fault this mission goes to hell I won’t even be able to forgive myself.

“Ready?” Eren asked everyone.

No. No, I’m not ready. I’m doubting myself. I’m having second thoughts. I’m panicking. This is not going to end well, and it’s all going to be my fault.

“Erwin opened the portal,” he said and we all walked through. No turning back now. I could barely even take a deep breath but I tried my damndest to hold my emotions in. I can’t let anyone else know I’m panicking. I can’t blow the mission.


	71. Too Late

The portal closed behind us and it was too late to turn back now. Oh god, this mission is doomed. I’m going to drag everyone down. I’m going to ruin all their hard work. I can’t do this.

As desperately as I tried to hold in my emotions I guess some slipped out. Eren instantly grabbed my hand and whispered in my ear. “Breath, everything will be okay, we got this.”

His voice sounded so calm and soothing. I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down. No one else seemed to realize my little episode as they all started to head towards the trees. We were a good distance from the camp and there weren’t any guards around.

“You can do this, I know you can, and deep down you know you can. Just remember screw what everyone else was thinking, you know your limits and you know damn well this is in your limits.”

He was right. I was so confident two days ago, but then everyone else made me think twice and I’ve let it influence me. Ya know what I’m not worried. If anything this just makes me want to prove them wrong.

“Feeling better?” Eren asked as I took a stable deep breath.

“Perfect, spite is a hell of a motivator,” I whispered back.

“Damn right it is, now go show everyone what you’re made of,” he said as we made our way back to the front of the group. He just told everyone we were trying to think up a plan and he thinks we got a solid one. Not only did he calm me down, but he came up with a plan as we were talking. That’s my boyfriend. He’s a badass.

We just started walking until Ymir raised a hand to stop us. “We are coming up on where guards will start patrolling.

“Alright,” Eren said, starting off his plan. He turned to Ymir and whispered. “Ouija, I need you to send a few spirits ahead and see if there are any cliffs or trenches along our path.

“Anything else they should look out for?” She asked.

“If there are any giant trees surrounded by a bunch of little trees, or by more giant trees, also where the guards are patrolling around those areas,” Eren specified.

“Okay I’ll send them out,” she said before rolling her eyes, “all except for one who says he’s keeping his eyes out for any guards around us.

That must be Gabriel. I thought to myself, of course, he would be the one to remember to watch over us here. I mean Marlowe is plenty capable of keeping a lookout, but he can’t look everywhere at once.

“That’s fine, we need more people watching our backs.”

Ymir sent them out while Gabriel helped lead us to a safe spot. We just backed up a bit from where the guards were patrolling and waited for the information to come.

We waited in silence until Ymir finally shook her head and mumbled out, “one at a time please, you’re giving me a damn headache.” She pulled out her notepad and started having each spirit fill her in and give her directions that were clear when read back out loud.

There are cliffs all around the camp as well as 5 trenches. They also found several giant trees, but only a few were surrounded by other trees big or small.”

She ripped out the pages that she wrote in and handed them to Eren who squinted his eyes to read them. I can tell by his thoughts the writing was a little messy and hard to read but that’s probably because Ymir is writing in the dark and Eren is also trying to read in the dark.

“From what I can see the closest thing to us is a big tree about 500 feet that way,” Eren said and Ymir nodded in agreement.

“That’s great and all, but what do trees, trenches, and cliffs have to do with anything?” Hanji asked and I could tell mostly everyone was thinking of the same thing.

“They have to do with the plan for us not to get caught,” Eren smiled. Ymir had Gabriel lead us past some guards to the first tree. Gabriel took the front whereas Marlowe was watching behind us. Once we were at the tree Eren leaned in and whispered to Hanji to fill her in on what she needed to do.

He gave me a nod as he tried to fill me in mentally, but I already knew since I’ve been following his thoughts since he first came up with this idea.

Hanji grabbed Erwin and Thomas with her vines, Eren lifted Marlowe Ymir and himself off the ground. I looked at Armin and gave him a nod before raising him and myself up. Eren made sure to only give me the lightest person because he didn’t want to put too much strain on my powers, but honestly, I think I could have taken two.

Once we were in the tree Hanji fastened some vines around everyone and hooked them to the tree branches keeping everyone secure at the top of the tree.

We waited a while up there figuring out where we should head next. There was another tree 400 feet diagonal to our leftish, and the next place we would be able to go is over 1000 feet to another tree, but diagonal more to our right, about 700 feet away there was a trench and only a few hundred feet from that there was another tree.

“I think we should head to the trench, 700 feet might be pushing it, but it’s better than trying to make 1000,” Eren suggested.

“You’re team leader, it’s your call,” Hanji shrugged.

“If you think we can make it 700 feet then let’s do it,” Erwin nodded.

“Well if we can’t make it 700 feet then how are we going to make it 1000,” Armin mumbled.

“Alright, looks like we are heading for the trench.” Eren pushed a moment, “Marlowe is it clear below us? Ouija can you have them check around to make sure we have a clear path?”

“Done and done.” She nodded.

When we got enough information about where the guards were we came down from the tree and started quietly making our way towards the trench. Surprisingly we only had to stop a few times and we weren’t spotted just hiding behind the trees and bushes.

When we made it to the little trench we all sat down in it and Eren had Hanji cover it over with vines and leaves making it look like small bushes and grass above us keeping us in perfect cover.

We all stayed quiet and caught our breaths before deciding to head towards the next tall tree. From the tree, there was only one more place to go. The cliff by the camp. We just had to make it 400 feet to the and to the cliff and we would be home free.

From what I heard this cliff was a nearly straight drop off the mountainside. We have to be extremely careful. So far everything is going well, better than we all could have expected but I still couldn’t shake this feeling that I’m going to fuck something up, but now is not the time for doubt now is the time to believe in my self as much as I can. I can’t be the reason this mission fails.

We came down from the tree once we knew it was safe and we all quickly went straight towards the cliff. There were a few guards nearby but if we were quick about this we could make it.

That’s what I thought until I heard Marlowe’s thoughts call out to me, and then again with Ymir’s.

Both of them told me that two guards turned around. Shit, they are coming this way they are going to spot us. I quickly whispered the information to Eren as we all moved a little faster.

“We have no other way. We have to jump,” Eren said and I let out a little sight before looking back at everyone.

“Jump,” I told them. Only me Hanji and Eren knew the full plan at this point so there confused and scared faces when I told them to jump off the cliff was awful to see, but there was no other choice, and no time to stop and explain.

When we made it to the cliff without hesitation almost everyone jumped off believing that we wouldn’t leave them to certain death. I felt the wind nearly get knocked out of me as Hanji’s vines wrapped around me and pulled me to the side of the cliff. She made a sturdy platform outta vines and leaves that were heavily woven and made it easier for us to stand and sit. We could barely see through them which helped since seeing through them would mean staring down a dead drop below us.

I looked around and everyone was here… everyone except Thomas. Shit. I looked up and there were lights on him and his hands were frozen in the air. He didn’t make it. I could hear the guards up at the top. “Who are you, what are you doing here? This is a restricted area.” A man said.


	72. Backing Out

“Is he one of them? A cursed?” I heard another man say.

“He’s an exile. We have to-,” they’re going to kill him. I looked at Eren and without any hesitation, Eren and I both lifted ourselves back up to the surface. Eren made a gravity field pulling both guards to us. I grabbed Thomas and helped him down while Eren lowered the guards down keeping his hands on both of their mouths while keeping them pinned to the wall by shifting their gravity.

“That’s it the missions blow,” Erwin shook his head. “We have to get out of here, who knows if they called for back up already.”

“They didn’t,” I said, taking a look into their minds. They were scared shitless.”

“Even so they saw us it’s not like we can just continue on with them knowing we are here.”

“We could always kill them,” Ymir shrugged.

“We don’t kill people,” Eren quickly intervened. “We aren’t monsters, remember? We don’t want to stoop down to their level.”

“We need to think fast,” Hanji said panicking.

“What’s there to think about? The mission is blown we’re done. We have to fall back,” Erwin shook his head.

“No, we don’t,” Eren said nodding and looking up, “Erwin I need you to open a portal back to base I have an idea about how we can save this mission without killing anyone.”

Erwin opened the portal, but he wasn’t quite sure how Eren was going to salvage this. I have to admit Eren’s mind is quite amazing. The things he comes up with on the spot have me amazed. I would have never come up with anything like this.

He turned to Armin and started talking, “Ghost we need you to find, Overload can you do that?”

Armin nodded and ran through the portal. I could hear everyone’s thoughts just on the other side of the portal. They were all confused and worried when Armin came running through. Even more so when he ran right back through with Hanna who was still in sleep pants a jacket and her mask.

When they came back through the portal closed to give Erwin a break. Hanna was still half asleep but she woke right up when she realized we were dangling well over 300 feet in the air.

“Where the hell are we,” she asked, clinging to my arm to stabilize herself. She held onto me for dear life as she forced her head up so she wasn’t staring down the drop.

“Don’t worry about that now,” I said nodding to Eren.

Before he could say anything she followed my gaze and saw Eren who had his hands over two people's mouths.

“Who are they… you guys got caught?” she asked, whipping her head back around to look at me waiting for someone to answer.

“Yes, but that's where you come in,” Eren said, getting her attention back towards him.

“What do you want me to do?” she asked, more confused than anything.

“Can you overload their minds to the point they have memory loss?”

“I mean I never tried it with that exact purpose in mind,” she said with a sigh. “I can’t even be sure that those are the specific memories that will be erased.”

“Just give it all you got. If it works great if it doesn’t then no worries we did all we could,” Eren shrugged.

“Okay, I’ll try my best,” She said before focusing in on the first guard. She used her power and I had to physically back up. I couldn’t be around her with how her power works without being affected.

“The first guard was unconscious yet she didn’t stop her power just yet. She overloaded his mind just a little more before backing up and taking a breath. “I can’t guarantee anything, but hopefully that works.

“It feels like you melted his brain,” I said rubbing at my own head. Even standing as far from her as I possibly could I could feel the pain still.

I could see the other guard squirming not that struggling worked with how tightly Eren had him pinned to the wall. I think he thought I was serious when I said she melted his brain. Poor soul, then again I don’t have any mercy for them they just tried to shoot Thomas a second ago.

“His turn,” I said I’m glad I was wearing a mask or everyone would see my smile as I threw him under the bus. His fear and panic made me smile. I wanted to laugh at his misery as Hanna stared him down and started her power. Oh god, I sound like a psychopath.

After both of the guards were unconscious Eren let their bodies slouch down the wall. “What now?” Hanna asked.

“Well, now we wait,” Eren said. “We need to get them back up on the ledge and position them against the trees maybe they might think they just fell asleep?”

“How long until they wake up?”

“I don’t know it can be anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours.” Hanna shrugged. “With how much I had to use my power on them I would be surprised if it takes them less than an hour to wake up.”

“Okay, we can go about this one of two ways,” Eren said looking around, “we wait for them to wake up, and then if it worked we continue the mission, if it didn’t work we leave and count our losses, or we continue on with the mission now while they are out and then same as the other if it works we already have the mission done if it doesn’t we leave, but we know the layout anyway.”

“While you guys figure it out I’m gonna send Hanna back,” Erwin said opening a portal for her.

“What do I tell everyone on the other end?” she asked.

“Nothing. Just tell them we will explain when we come back,” Eren said and she nodded before walking through. The portal closed behind her.

“I think we should continue on with the mission,” Hanji suggested, “what’s the worst that can happen?”

“Well, the worst that can happen is they wake up with all their memories while we still have people inside. Then we would have to make a quick break for it and hope that we can find a hiding spot while every guard is hunting us down until everyone can get back together.” Eren said and Hanji’s face instantly dropped.

“Oh, yeah that would be bad.”

“I am leaving it up to you guys.”

“But you’re the team leader,” Thomas said looking at Eren, “you make the decisions and we follow.”

“But I don’t want to make a decision that puts everyone’s lives on the line if not everyone is comfortable with this,” Eren said before looking around. “If anyone wants to end the mission now please raise your hand.”

There was a moment of silence and I saw a few people look down. I heard one person’s thoughts clear as day. They wanted out.

“Don’t be afraid to speak up no one is going to judge you if you do want out. We understand this is risky,” I said, and finally, his hand went up. Once Marlowe’s hand went up so did Thomas’s. He was on the fence about the whole thing but once Marlowe showed he wasn’t on board Thomas felt a lot better about not being the only one wanting out.

They were the only two with their hands up, but it was enough for Eren.

“Okay we will head back,” Eren said but Marlowe shook his head.

“No, you all look like you want to keep going, just send us back, you can do the rest of the mission without us.”

I just shrugged and he had a point. They were the only ones not on board with this and his part of the mission is done, Thomas on the other hand we kinda needed for this next part, but we could do it without him if needed.

“Alright, Erwin open the portal,” Eren said and Erwin did just that.

“I won’t tell anyone what’s going on. I'll wait for you guys to explain it yourselves,” he said before walking through.

“My power doesn’t require me here to work, so I’ll connect you guys before I go. Hopefully, it’s enough to keep you safe,” he said before starting to connect everyone. I told him he could leave me out of it and he did just that. His power mixed with mine sounds like a headache. I’ll just stick to listening in on Eren’s thoughts to be connected. After he finished he walked through the portal too.

The portal closed and we decided we were going to continue with the mission right now. Eren and I positioned the guards up by the trees slumped against them like they had fallen asleep. We left them in my range so I could monitor their thoughts when they woke up to see if they had any memories of what had happened. With Thomas’s power connecting everyone’s thoughts together so that if we did have to make a quick escape then we could it was a little easier to have faith that even if the worst-case scenario played out it might be a little easier for us to get away.

Armin, Ymir, and Erwin all start looking through the camp. Ymir was writing in her notes everything the spirits were telling her. Armin and Erwin were relaying the information directly to us as we wrote down the information. Hanji and Erwin took care of writing down the information while I stayed as the look out. I kept watch over the two guards making sure that I know when they wake up. I also kept my powers busy searching for anyone else who came near the cliff's edge who might spot us.

After all, the information was collected and everyone returned all that was left now was to wait for them to wake up and see what they remembered. It’s all just a waiting game now.


	73. Explaining

We figured it was pointless to have everyone wait here so we sent everyone else back through the portal. Only Levi, Erwin, and I stayed behind to see if this long-shot plan really worked. Hanna must have done a number on them because it’s been nearly three hours and they are still unconscious.

“One of them is waking up,” Levi said and I felt my blood run cold here it is the moment of truth.

“They just woke up the other guys,” Levi said, his voice sounded monotone, but his jaw was clenched and his muscles were tense.

I saw him relax. “They just think they dozed off on patrol, neither of them remembers a thing. They don’t even remember coming out here in the first place. The last they remember they were in the barracks waking up for their shift.”

“That's a good thing?” Erwin asked, “did we erase too much memory?”

“No, they just assumed they were too tired to remember anything.”

“Thank god,” I mumbled. I honestly can’t believe that worked that was such a last-ditch effort to save this mission and it actually worked.

Erwin opened the portal and we all walked through. Hanji stuck her arm back through and got rid of all the leaves and the vines that were on the mountainside. She made them all die and rot away so that no one would be able to find it.

Once the portal closed behind us I could tell we had a lot of explaining to do. Everyone was looking at me waiting for answers to why we had to randomly grab Hanna, why we sent two teammates home, why we took so long to complete the mission.

“Did it work?” Was all Hanna asked and I could see the others who knew what was going on were wondering the same thing. Everyone else looked confused by what she meant.

“Yes, it worked,” I smiled. Now how do I explain this to everyone else?

“Everyone follow us,” Levi said before walking down the hall. I just followed him. He has an idea of how to tell everyone, but where are we going?

He led us into the conference room and gestured for everyone to take a seat. “This is going to be a long conversation so I thought we might as well get comfortable. Not only do we have to talk about what happened on the mission, but we have to tell some of you about the camp’s information and layout and such,” He said looking over towards Pixis, Nanba, and Shadis.

Levi and I explained everything that happened on the mission. We started at the beginning not because we wanted to be thorough, but because we were dragging out getting to the part where one of us got spotted. I could see their responses already. While we explained I started taking off my braces my arms were starting to hurt with how long I left them on.

The missions off it’s too risky. How could you make such a careless mistake? Why did you continue on with the mission without informing us? Last but not least, I knew at least one if not more of them would cut us off before we are able to explain and say something along the lines of see I knew Levi going on this mission was a bad idea, even though it wasn’t Levi’s fault. Ugh, why did this have to be so difficult… Why do they have to be so difficult?

I could see as a lightbulb went off in Levi’s head as we got near to the point where everything went wrong. “For this next part I need everyone to promise that they won’t interrupt before I’m done speaking,” he said and everyone nodded.

“If anyone interrupts I’m sending you outside and you won’t get to know what happens,” he said, not fully believing them. That’s actually really smart to say it should shut them up enough so we could explain everything.

“Fair enough just tell us what happens,” Pixis nodded, wanting us to continue.

The second the words one of us was spotted left Levi’s mouth I saw Jean’s mouth open. Before he said a word I threw one of my braces at him.

Everyone's eyes went from him to me and then back to him. “Ouch, message received jackass,” Jean mumbled, rubbing the side of his head where the hard part of the brace hit him. I’m not even sorry, I’ve been wanting to do that all night. I looked at Levi and gave him a wink. That was for you babe, I know his thoughts were probably really bad towards you all day so maybe that makes you feel better. I asked mentally.

“It does,” Levi whispered as he gave me a smile. He quickly cleared his throat and continued talking. He said that it wasn’t anyone’s fault that we were spotted just that not all of us made the jump in time. After a moment of silence and doubtful stares, Thomas spoke up.

“He’s lying. It was my fault. I hesitated when they told me to jump and because of that I was spotted.”

“That’s not your fault Thomas. I should have been more clear that the jump wasn’t a suicide mission,” Levi said giving him a nod, “besides even if you did jump without hesitation I think they still would have saw one of us.”

“Nevermind all the specifics right now,” Levi shook his head and continued on he caught them up on the rest of the mission. Once everyone was caught up and satisfied most of them left. The few that stayed we briefed on the camp’s layout. It didn’t take long to read them our notes and explain them. Once we finished talking about them we handed them over to Pixis for him and the others to study and come up with a basic plan… even though they are still going to probably have me come up with plans for both of these missions anyway.

After we finished briefing everyone we headed straight to bed. We were exhausted. This mission not only took way more time than normal but also way more energy too. When we walked into our room I saw my other brace laying on our bed. Jean must have left it here after I threw it at him. I put them both away and Levi and I got ready for bed.

We both laid down and closed our eyes. It looked like Levi fell asleep instantly, but I couldn’t. Despite being so damn exhausted I can’t keep my eyes closed. The events from today just played over and over in my head again and again and again. I stared at the ceiling for what felt like hours just replaying today's events. That could have gone a lot worse than it did.

The image of those guns pointing at Thomas. The thought that we could have lost another person today because I didn’t plan ahead is eating at me. I need to be more prepared. I can’t bear to lose another person let alone have it be my fault.

“It wouldn’t be your fault,” I heard Levi say. I looked up at him and his eyes were open.

“You were awake this whole time?” I asked him already knowing the answer.

“Yeah.” His arm pulled me closer to him, “but what I said is true. It wouldn’t have been your fault.”

“You’re right,” I didn’t want to argue about it so I just agreed with him. I mean a part of me knows he is right, but a part of me would still feel so guilty and responsible. “Still from now on, I want us to have a more concrete plan going into the mission.”

“Well that’s usually the goal, but sometimes it’s easier said than done,” he shrugged.

“I know.” I couldn’t help but let out a frustrated sigh. I wish we just knew all the information we needed to know and could just come up with any plan that would be 100 percent effective.

“At that point, you might as well just wish for all of this to be over,” Levi laughed.

“Well, that has been my biggest wish for the longest time, but no one’s granting it so I’m trying for some smaller ones.”

“I think you’re still reaching too high. To start let’s just try asking that everyone makes it through these next two missions safely.”

“Oh definitely,” I nodded before letting out a yawn.

“Now we can talk about wishes and stuff in the morning but right now let’s get some sleep, please. Before your thoughts start rambling on loop again and keep me up.”

“Sorry. Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.” I closed my eyes before whispering. “I love you.”

“I love you too baby.”


	74. Thomas

When I woke up I looked over at Eren and made sure he was still sleeping. I quietly slid out of his arms and got dressed. I headed to Thomas’s room and knocked. A quiet come in came from the room. When I walked in it was almost like he expected me to be showing up.

“I’m sorry about screwing up the mission,” he blurted out.

I just froze for a moment. Had he been dwelling on that all night. He looks like he hasn’t slept much or at all. “That’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about,” I said before walking closer to him. He was sitting on his bed. “Do you mind if I sit?” I asked and he gave a small nod and scooted over to allow me room to sit next to him. “You know none of us blame you right?”

“It doesn’t matter if I would have just listened-” he said and I had to cut him off.

“No, what I asked of you was unfair. I should have been more clear with the plans.”

“No, I should have realized that you guys had a plan. Nanaba told us from the start that some instructions might sound bad in the heat of the moment but there’s always a reason that they are given. I should have listened. I knew better than to freeze up. Levi I should have known,” Thomas said pulling his legs closer to his chest.

“Thomas look, I know you think at the moment you should have known. We all think that after the fact, but at that very moment all of our minds were racing. It was impossible to think straight let alone remember something Nanaba told you months maybe even years ago. You weren’t the only one with doubts. The only reason I think everyone else jumped is that they have a better knowledge of our powers, you guys haven’t been with us as long as they have. Even some of our team had doubts about jumping. Honestly, I don’t even think Armin did jump. I think he panicked and his foot phased through the cliff’s edge. It wouldn’t be the first time,” I mumbled laughing to myself.

“Really?”

“Yup. Trust me you weren’t the only one hesitating. “Also like I said last night I think we would have been spotted even if you didn’t hesitate. We were all too slow; they would have seen your head as well as Ymir’s. The only reason they didn’t see Ymir’s head disappear was because you were blocking their view. I think it was better that you did hesitate.”

“How so?”

“Because if they saw us disappear over the cliff they would have known there were at least two or more and would have probably just called for back up straight away, but because they only saw you they didn’t think there might be more and they didn’t see you as a threat right away meaning we could take them out before they alerted anyone.”

“So what does that mean?” he asked a little confused about where I was going with this,

“It means you hesitating was actually the best thing that could have happened. You saved the mission.”

“I-I did?” he asked looking up at me.

I gave him a smile and nodded. “Damn right you did.”

He smiled and then looked down at the bed before whispering out, “thank you. I needed to hear that.” He let out a yawn and I could tell he got the closure he needed to be able to get some rest.

“You get some sleep I have to go talk to Pixis and see when they are planning for the next mission,” I said before standing up.

I stopped in the door and looked back at him and he was already laying down with his eyes closed he must have been exhausted. He was asleep before I even left the room. I turned back around and left the room. Before I could even think about heading to Pixis I bumped into Nanaba.

“Oh, sorry didn’t see you there,” I said quickly.

“My bad,” she mumbled awkwardly, “sorry I know I shouldn’t have been eavesdropping, but I was going to check in on him when I heard you talking.”

“It’s alright,” I shrugged.

“That was really nice of you,” she smiled, “it’s not easy to get someone to stop blaming themselves, but you did it so effortlessly. How did you do it?”

“I just told him the truth.”

“That’s it?” she asked a little surprised. “Usually the truth isn’t enough to convince people.”

“Sometimes it’s not, but this time it was,” I shrugged. “Anyway I have to go check in with Pixis,” I said trying to excuse myself.

“Oh yeah, Eren’s already there waiting for you.”

I just nodded and started walking. Damn Eren’s already awake. I wanted to talk to Pixis before Eren could wake up. I want on the mission even if my arm isn’t fully healed. Eren might try and talk him out of it. I’m not sure if he will after last night’s mission, but he knows that I was doubting myself he might tell Pixis that. I headed straight into his office and saw Eren and Pixis sitting there.

“Oh there you are,” Pixis smiled greeting me, “Eren told me you would be coming and we should wait for you.”

“He did?” I asked. That’s surprising. I guess he isn’t planning on trying to get me off the mission. No, his thoughts say the opposite. He wants me on the mission.

I know how stressed you were last night, but you did amazing, and you showed everyone that even injured you still got it. Remember our promise we go on the mission together or we don’t go at all. I want us both on these next missions because with us together we got the best chance of winning. Eren thought to me.

“I’m assuming you two wanted to talk about the next two missions,” Pixis suggested.

“Yes, we need to start planning. These are going to be some of the hardest since we are doing two missions in one night and we don’t have as much manpower since we are splitting our group in half, Eren explained.

“We need all hands on deck,” Pixis nodded. “People who don’t normally go on missions might have to help out.”

“Exactly,” Eren nodded.

“We need to practice more hand to hand combat,” I suggested.

“We could have people in the front lines remove the weapons from the equation and then have an easier time having the others take people down by hand?” Eren suggested going off of what I was saying.

“Sounds like you two have already started thinking about the plan.

Eren nodded before continuing, “the only issue I keep running into is that for both teams to be able to remove weapons and go into hand to hand we would need Levi on one team and me on the other. We are the only two who would be able to pull that off, and we aren’t splitting up,” Eren said quickly.

“Not necessarily,” I said, taking a moment to think. I mean yes our powers are the easiest when it comes to removing weapons, but I think more of our teammates can do it too, just not in the same way.”

“Explain,” Pixis said, listening intently.

“Well, like Sasha can have her clones appear and disappear at will. If she gets close enough she could have clones pop out and disarm some guards, Petra, though I doubt we could talk her into it could melt the guns or turn them into gas. Franz could copy my power before we split up and during the mission, he could keep copying someone else's and help with that. Connie could pull the weapons out of their hands before they even know what happens. Just to name a few,” I shrugged. “I mean if we got really creative we could probably do more, but we would have to test people's abilities first.”

“Then that’s what we should work on for the next week or so and then we can figure out when we are planning on going through with the mission.”

“Now that sounds like a plan,” I nodded patting Eren on the shoulder. He was stressing too much about the overall plan. I swear he’s changed it like 10 times in his head already. He’s stressing about keeping everyone safe this time around. He keeps thinking that everything rests on his shoulders, but it doesn’t he can rely on us to help. He can rely on me.

He looked up at me and I gave him a smile. Everything is going to go right this time around no one is going to get hurt no one is going to die.

“We’ve got this,” I whispered to him and he gave me a smile.

I hope you're right. He thought.


	75. Supply Run

“Before we can do any of that,” Pixis said with a hesitant tone. “We are running low on supplies and need to stock up again,” he said, his tone a little quieter than before.

“How many people do you think we will need this time?” I asked before looking at Levi who I assume was thinking the same thing as me. We might need more people since our last supply run didn’t seem to last us long just a few weeks. We needed it to last for a lot longer than it did.

“More than last time,” Pixis mumbled.

“Basically as many people we can get to go out,” Levi asked.

“Yeah basically.”

“I’ll go around and see who is up for a supply run. You and Eren make the list of supplies we need.”

“We will meet in the conference room,” Pixis clarified as Levi Headed for the door. He nodded before going off to find some people.

We came up with a list of supplies everyone needed and some basic necessities that we were running low on like toilet paper and sanitary products. We wrote down some types of foods that aren’t perishable and made sure we put water down for everyone to pick up. We go through water like crazy, everyone would probably have to pick up two or three each.

“Here’s the money for you and Levi, I’ll pass the rest out to the others,” Pixis said, handing it to me and I didn’t even want to ask where he got it from this time. Whether it was taken from the guards at the last camp, or from some other scheme I didn’t care to know.

It’s hard to not think about it, but at the same time, you do what you have to to survive. If that means begging and stealing then so be it. I know it’s not right to steal, but at the same time when it’s our only option for survival then what other choice is there?

I took the money and shoved it in my pocket not wanting to know where it came from, but still feeling guilty. We stood up and walked towards the conference room to see how many people agreed to do the run this time.

We walked in and the room was almost filled. I’m surprised it’s usually a lot harder to get people to agree to do this.

The first few people I saw were Rico, Nanaba, and Hannes. “Are you three going together?” Pixis asked as we walked up.

“No Hannes and I are going as a married couple,  
Nanaba said before pulling out two rings which I assumed are fake, but look real enough. Rico will be paired with one from your group. I figured we were sticking with groups of two again?” She asked to make sure.

“It’s the most ideal.”

Rico followed Pixis and I as we searched for someone to group her with. I saw Molbit and Mom and asked Pixis if we should pair her with one of them. They would sometimes go together on supply runs, but with it getting more and more dangerous we want to pair them with someone with powers just in case something bad happens.

“I can go with Molbit,” she volunteered.

“Alright, I guess that solves that,” Pixis nodded.

I looked around and everyone else was grouped up aside from two, “Armin can go with mom,” I suggested and Pixis nodded before calling them over and having them group up.

“So that makes,” he paused and counted, “eleven groups of two.”

“Erwin is going to portal everyone out of here to different alleys near stores in different cities. Everyone has an hour to gather supplies before the portals open back up in the same spot. Be there or we will have to send someone there after you.” Pixis said to everyone.

He dismissed everyone to get ready and told us all to meet back in the common area when we were ready. It was time to get a different costume on. Ones that we hardly ever wear anymore. Normal everyday casual clothes. A lot of us wore brighter colors. We knew that people who wore darker colors looked more suspicious and were more likely to be harassed by patrolling officers and guards. We headed into the common area and got in a line as Erwin walked up to the front Pixis went around and passed out the money to each group.

We were one of the last people being sent out through the portal, well last aside from Hanji and Erwin. Pixis had me write down the group's names and what city they were going to. Once I was done I was supposed to hand the list to Petra.

First through the portal was Mom and Armin, next was Molbit and Rico, then Nanaba and Hannes. After they went we had to stop for a moment as we waited for the alley to clear so Erwin could open the next portal. When the alley finally cleared Erwin made the portal bigger than just the eyes hole he was looking through and sent Ymir and Christa through. Next up was Reiner and Berthold, then Mikasa and Annie. We waited a little more and then sent through Sasha and Connie, then Jean and Marco. Pixis and Shadis went next Pixis gave me a nod before walking through.

I handed the paper to Petra before Levi and I walked through ours. I could only imagine Hanji and Erwin went through theirs right after. I looked at Levi took a deep breath and nodded. We started heading towards the nearest store which was a few blocks away. I could;t help but take a deep breath. The fresh air was nice and the warm feeling of the sun on my skin was a feeling I didn’t realize I was longing for.

“I missed it too,” Levi whispered, closing his eyes and looking up for a moment. He let out a deep breath and looked back at me, “we don’t have much time,” his tone was quiet.

We made it to the store and when we got inside we went straight to work. Levi and I tried to stay near each other for most of the time, but we had to split up a few times just to grab items if we wanted to make the hour deadline in time. There was so much to grab in so little time. We had to get a lot of stuff, but not too much or it would look suspicious. We also had to keep track of how expensive everything was. We didn’t want to grab too much and not have enough. There were a few items we had to pass up because they went over budget. We didn’t pass up anything that people needed, but some of the more expensive food items had to be put back.

Just as we thought we were home, I saw out of the corner of my eye a uniform and I knew to keep my eyes down at the list and pretend I didn’t see anything. I can’t get nervous or let any emotions show at all. I can’t even acknowledge their presence. They didn’t seem to pay me much mind. Good. Levi came around the corner after grabbing the last item and… oh shit. The guard is walking over to us.

“How is your day going fellas?” he asked, walking up to us. There was a hint of malice under his deceitfully friendly tone. Oh no. We don’t have time for this, our hour is nearly up and we haven’t even paid yet.

When we came out at the alley I nearly forgot where we were supposed to go. I started walking and I heard laughing behind me. “Jean’s it’s this way,” Marco said pointing in the opposite direction.

“I knew that,” I said, turning around with an awkward smile. We started heading into the store. We found most of the stuff on our list with no issues. While we were hedging to get the last few items we saw someone with a red badge keeping their head towards the ground. I wanted to walk up to her and take her with us and offer her a chance to fight with us, but I knew I couldn’t. It kills me that I have to walk past and pretend not to see her. If anything I had to act repulsed by her to keep our cover.

I looked towards Marco and I could see the same look on his face. He was thinking what I was. He just looked at me and shook his head. “I know,” I whispered. We started to walk away when we heard something fall on the floor. I turned to look and saw her badge had fallen off. She was reaching down to pick it up when a man in uniform walked up behind her and pinned her to the ground and put a gun to the back of her head.

“Don’t move or I’ll blow your head off.”

“Please, it was an accident,” she cried.

“You removed your badge as an act of rebellion that’s no accident.”

“It fell off, please, I have to feed my family,” they put restraints on her and started to walk her out with guns still trained on her. If she was a blue badge they would have shot her without any hesitation.

I turned to go after them and Marco caught my arm. His eyes were looking down at the ground and his jaw was clenched. “Don’t” he whispered. The amount of strain in his voice he was holding himself back too. I took a deep breath and backed down. I turned back to Marco and gave him a nod.

“Sorry,” I whispered. We took a deep breath and finished grabbing the rest of our stuff. We headed to check out and then back to the alley. We were right on time. We saw the portal open and quickly walked through.

We walked out of the portal and looked around. It was sunny and warm out and I couldn’t tell whether I wanted to hide away from the light or stay in it forever.

“Ymir let’s go, we need to hurry this list is long,” Christa said showing me it.

“Okay let’s go.” We headed into the store and grabbed what we came for. Everything went perfect, we were in and out without an issue. We were walking back towards the alley and we were passing a police station when we noticed someone walking past us. We kept our heads down but something made me lookup. The person who was walking past us had a gun out. My head shot up to make sure that the gun wasn’t pointing towards us.

Before I could see what happened a gunshot rang out. Christa let out a little yelp and frantically looked at me to make sure I wasn’t shot. I looked around and saw someone lying dead on the sidewalk across the street. My heart was racing as I saw the blue badge still pinned to his shirt. The man who just shot him quickly looked towards us, the gun still out.

“Is there an issue?” he asked. Shit, he heard Christa yelp. She wasn’t supposed to react.

I wanted nothing more than to grab the gun from his hands and fire the rest of the clip into him, but I just quickly looked up at him and smiled. “Sorry about her she gets scared really easily especially by loud noises.”

“Is that so,” he asked he didn’t seem to believe me.

I wanted to tell her not to but I knew I couldn’t the second she looked up at him I mentally cursed to myself.

She looked up at him and smiled, “yes I’m so sorry for jumping, but thank you for keeping our city safe,” she said and I could see the pain behind her eyes.

“Your welcome,” he glared before walking away without another word.

“I didn’t,” she mumbled. I could have sworn she was about to use her power on him, but she managed to get him off our trail without it.

“Let’s get back before we get stopped again,” I whispered. She nodded but I could still see how hard she fought herself not to look back at that man lying dead just across the street. I on the other hand was trying my best to ignore his ghost who was trying to talk to me right now. He knew I could see him, but talking to him right now might blow our cover.

“Please, not now,” I whispered as quietly as I could. Christa didn’t even acknowledge it, she knew it wasn’t meant for her.

We walked into the alley and saw the tiny portal up against the wall. They were waiting for us. We quickly poked a finger through to let them know we were ready and the alley was clear. They opened the portal and we walked in it closed behind us the second we stepped through.


	76. Mother Knows Best

“You guys sure are buying a lot of supplies,” the man said as we looked down at our cart. It looked bad. We had two huge packs of toilet paper and several non-perishable foods. We had a ton of sanitary products and other packs of hygiene stuff.

“We like to be prepared,” Levi said with a smile that to anyone else looked so normal, but to me looked like the fakest thing in the world. “You know with all the cursed walking around we don’t like to leave the house much.

“And you need these?” The man asked, picking up the box of tampons.

“They’re for our sister,” I said quickly.

“This many?” he asked, seeing more than one box in our basket.

I just let out an awkward laugh, “I don’t know how many to grab it’s my first time picking them up for her I just want her to have enough,” I said playing dumb.

“Really,” he said before dropping it, “What happened to your arm?” he asked because he was looking for a reason to take us in. He was watching us closely and listening to every word we said. Any slip up and we would be arrested, or worse.

“I fell down the stairs,” Levi laughed. I could hear the smallest bit of panic. He wasn't sure what to say and he just blurted out the first thing that came to mind. “That’s why you should always turn on the lights at night.”

“Is that so?” Shit, he wasn’t buying it.

I looked around and everyone was back in the common area, everyone but… where’s Levi and Eren? I ran over to Pixis. It's already ten minutes past something went wrong.

“Send me in after them.”

“It’s too dangerous I’ll-.” He started to say.

“Bullshit those are my babies send me through,” I glared him down and without another word, he nodded.

He called Thomas over and had him connect us so he knew if something went wrong. After that, he nodded to Erwin. The portal opened and I ran through. I had to hurry. I ran straight to the store making sure to look around so that I didn’t pass them on the street in my hurry. When I got to the store I looked down every row before finding them near the back of the store.

I saw a guard there talking to them. He didn't look like he was buying what they were selling. Damn it, I need to think fast. I walked up and pretended I didn’t see the guard.

“There you boys are, I told you to meet me at the front of the store 15 minutes ago. You had me worried sick you know better than to stay out too long with all these cursed around,” I said before pretending to see the guard.

“Oh, sorry sir I didn’t see you there,” I said before putting on my biggest smile, “that you for keeping me and my boys safe,” I said and he stared me down not sure whether or not to believe me.

“You are their mother?” He asked. “Yes, I adopted them both when they were just babies. Poor things, this one’s mother was killed by one of those dreaded cursed.” I said putting my hand on Levi’s shoulder.

“You don’t have any bags?” he asked.

“No, I put them in the car already.”

“How did your son hurt his arm?” he asked almost like a test. Levi must have given him an answer and he’s trying to match both of ours.

“Clumsy little thing fell down the stairs,” I rolled my eyes. “He really should be more careful.”

“Any reason you need this much stuff?” he asked and I looked around their cart and saw some issues with what they were buying for a family of three.

“Well, we are trying to be prepared. We don't like leaving the house unless we have to.” I said before realizing something else, “though I do think that’s a little too many boxes of tampons,” I laughed, “Isabel doesn’t need that many boys.”

“Well, how are we supposed to know? You just said grab some so we did,” Levi rolled his eyes.

“Some don’t mean 5 packs,” I laughed, “though we could give some to the Jeffersons, I know they were tight on money this month, and I know they have two daughters,” I said making an excuse for them to keep them in the cart.

The guard just stared at us for a while before backing up and walking away. I took a deep breath and walked with them to grab the last few things on the list. We headed to the front to check out. I noticed the man was still watching us as we walked around.

When we headed out of the store he followed behind and stood at the door watching us. Oh no, he was waiting for us to walk to our car.

Levi acted fast and used his powers to make the car unlock and we opened the trunk and started loading groceries in it until he walked back inside. We quickly got the bags out of the car and closed the trunk before locking it. We quickly headed back towards the alley and I told them to open the portal. We came through and all let out a sigh of relief when the portal closed behind us.

“How did you know I told him I fell down the stairs?” Levi asked.

“Mother knows best,” I shrugged and when they didn’t buy it I just laughed. "I just thought of the most ridiculous overused excuse and went with that,” I said, raising an eyebrow.

“Touche” he laughed.

We helped Pixis put all the supplies away before calling everyone in to discuss the missions. He gave everyone a briefing and told them we would need all hands on deck. I could tell that not everyone was very happy about that. We wouldn’t force anyone to go on the mission, but I could tell they knew how urgent it was that they join.

I even caught Petra’s thoughts saying that she might participate as long as she isn’t the one fighting. I don’t want her to feel like she has to, but if she’s okay with joining her power would be a great advantage.

“Levi?” Eren whispered, getting my attention. “How is everyone?”

“They are thinking about what he’s saying. Some people have already made up their minds that they will go, others are still on the fence.”

He nodded and we waited for the mission briefing to conclude. Pixis dismissed everyone with a final line, “I would like a show of hands who will be joining if you are unsure then please have the night to think about it. Speak to me in the morning. I don’t want anyone to feel pressure to join us. A few people raised their hands and Pixis wrote them down. “Thank you all for listening.” Everyone stood to leave and we walked up to Pixis. He just gestured for us to follow him before sitting down in his office.

“We have a few people who raised their hands who don’t normally go on missions,” he said before showing us the list. All of the usual people joined, but there were a few others who I was surprised to see decide so early.

“Mike, Eld, Auruo, and Mina,” I nodded.

“So almost everyone,” Eren looked. “I think the only ones who haven’t are Petra, Mom, and Molbit.”

“If Mom or Molbit even tried to raise their hands we wouldn’t let them go. They are our spies they need to stay hidden,” I said.

“Yeah, that’s true.”

“A few others from Nanaba’s group are undecided too,” Pixis pointed at the list.

“Hitch, Thomas, and Marlowe,” I said looking at the list again. “In their thoughts, most of them seemed like they were more leaning toward going.”

“Well, let’s hope they stay leaning that way,” Pixis nodded.

“Petra actually seemed like she might decide to go.”

“She what?” Eren asked.

“I didn’t see that coming,” Pixis mumbled.

“I don’t know if she will. She was still on the fence and weighing the options. Though if she does go she doesn’t want to be a part of the fighting.”

“Well, anything from her could help. So whatever she chooses we will stand by it,” he nodded.

“Good, cause I want in,” she said from behind us.

We all whipped our heads around to look at her.

“Are you sure?” Pixis asked out of habit.

She just stared at him with a little grin, “I thought you were going to stand by my choice?”

“I am, I just want to make sure you are absolutely sure about this.”

“I am on two conditions,” she said.

“Let’s hear them.”

“I don’t have to fight. I can disarm people and whatever, but I won’t be one of the people actually harming people.”

“Done,” he nodded, “and the second one?”

“I go on the Desert mission.”

I couldn’t read her until she said that. She wants revenge on those two guards who were shit-talking Ilsa. “They might not even be there,” I said quickly and no one else knew what I was talking about.

“Regardless of if they are there or not, I want to prove to them that their actions have consequences. We aren’t just going to stand by and take their shit anymore.”

“Alright,” I sighed, “then with that condition I have my own condition,” I said and both Pixis and Petra looked at me with a raised eyebrow. “Petra’s on our team.”

“Do you really think that’s best? Your team usually leads the charge?” Pixis asked.

“Yes, and that’s why she should be on our team. Our team is used to start the fight, yes, but it is also used to disarm. She can disarm while we fight. Besides I want to keep an eye on her and make sure she is safe.”

Pixis nodded before looking at Petra. “It’s up to you.”

“I’m okay with that,” she nodded.

Over the next few hours of us planning the last three gave us their answer. Everyone was going on the mission except for Mom and Molbit.

It was time to make the teams. Nothing concrete, but enough to get a basic understanding of how we were going to do this.

The best we came up with is we had 31 people in total. 3 teams of 5 each and one team with 6. Now, all we had to decide was who goes where for now and after practice we will see if anyone needs to change places.


	77. Fireballs

It took us a while to get to the point where we got the teams fully fleshed out to the point where if we had to go in without any changes we could make do. We might still have to make changes, but maybe not depending on how training goes.

“Team A, B, and C, for the Mountain mission and Team A, B, and C for the desert mission were set up so that team A and team C provided the most cover. Team B was more of the hand to hand combat fighters, as well as some of team C. Team A, was more of the ones who disarmed and could fight from a distance.

After putting that system into place the groups came easier. So for the desert mission, Levi and I were on team A leading the charge. The rest of our team is Petra, Jean, and Marco. Everyone in our team could provide cover aside from Petra who we needed to cover. However, she would be essential in disarming the enemies. We made sure everyone in our group could disarm them in one way or another.

Behind us, in team B we have Berthold, Reiner, Ymir, Christa, and Armin. Lastly behind them in team C is Hanji, Erwin, Hanna, Mina, and Franz. They were more tasked with hand to hand combat and some of them could still disarm if needed.

In the mountain mission leading the charge are Mikasa and Annie. The rest of their team is Sasha, Connie, and Hitch. They tasked with more hand to hand and moreover for the group ahead.

Leading the charge for the mountain mission is Mikasa and Annie. The rest of their group is Sasha, Connie, and Hitch. They could also disarm, and provide cover really easily to the rest of the teams.

Their team B is Nanaba, Hannes, Rico, Marlowe, Thomas, and Gunther. They all were better at hand to hand combat, however, Rico’s power could lend them a great cover as well as disarm any enemies sneaking up on them.

Lastly, their team C is Pixis, Shadis, Eld, Mike, and Auruo. The could easily help with hand to hand combat as well as provide back up and cover if needed.

Running through the teams in my head I took a deep breath. This might actually work. I was really worried since we are short on people for these missions, but these layouts should work nicely. If all goes to plan we should be able to get through these missions without any issues… or am I being too optimistic. What if I’m blind-sighted by my optimism and because of that everything goes horribly wrong. No, I need to keep planning. I need to have several back-up plans in place so nothing can go wrong again. I need to find every possible way this can go wrong and make a plan to counteract it I need-.

“Geez calm down your stressing me out.” Levi rolled his eyes and stopped walking. We were heading back to our room after finishing our planning with Pixis. “We have the rest of the day to ourselves and you’re spending it stressing yourself out with hypothetical problems.”

“But so much could go wrong and.-”

“And what?” he raised an eyebrow, “so much can always go wrong. Guards could bust through the doors of this place at any moment and shoot us all.” He took a deep breath and shook his head, “sorry that’s not helping,” he mumbled. “All I’m saying is that yes so much can go wrong but dwelling on it will do nothing we can plan for it later, but we don’t even have a fully fleshed-out plan yet all we have are the teams. Don’t stress yourself out about something we haven’t even made yet.”

I took a deep breath and nodded. “You’re right, but you’re an ass now I can’t stop thinking about guards coming and raiding this place.”

He let out an awkward laugh, “yeah sorry that was probably the worst thing I could say to try and calm you down.”

“Ya think.”

“I know what will calm you down,” he smiled and I raised an eyebrow.

“Maybe we should ask Jean if he wants to spar?”

“He won’t spar with me anymore,” I pouted. “He says his ass permanently hurts from him landing on it every time I throw him out of the ring.”

“Well damn it was worth a shot,” he mumbled, “I know beating up Jean always brings a smile to your face.”

“Beating him up doesn’t, but fucking with him does. Ya know what, let’s see if Jean is busy,” I said with a devious smile.

“There’s the Eren I know,” Levi laughed as we walked into Jean and Marco’s room. All Levi had to do was give Marco a look and Marco knew to back up.

Jean picked the wrong time to take a nap. Marco just looked at me and rolled his eyes before walking into the hall and peeking his head in. “I’d rather not get burned when he’s trying to kill you,” Marco whispered to me.

“But you want to see it happen?” I asked.

“Oh, of course, this is going to be hilarious,” Marco smiled. Levi just followed Marco’s lead and hid in the hallway with his head poked around the corner.

Hmm, let’s see how was I going to fuck with him today. I could jump on him, Nah I’ve already done that more than a few times recently… I could throw him out of bed with a gravity field… nope that’s overdone too… Oh I know, let’s switch it up a little.

When I got my idea I gave Levi and Marco a thumbs up before climbing into bed next to Jean. I ran my fingers through his hair and he stirred a little. I felt his arms wrap around me and he laid his head on my chest. Perfect. I kept running my fingers through his hair and when he started to wake up he looked up at me. “Good morning baby, I had fun last night didn’t you?” I asked and I saw the pure horror on his face as he desperately tried to recall what he had done or didn’t do.

Before he could figure it out I quickly pinned him to the ceiling with a loud thump as his back slammed against it. I made my escape as he fell back down to the bed full force. “Fuck you, Jaeger,” I heard him yell after me in a very winded tone. I guess I knocked the wind right out of him with that. I stood in the doorway laughing, Marco and Levi next to me trying their hardest to contain their laughter. It didn’t take him long to catch his breath. When he did I knew this was the part where I should start running.

I took off down the hallway and I could tell he was hot on my tail… and I mean literally hot. I could feel the heat from the fireballs he was throwing at me. I used my gravity fields to change their directions and make them collide into walls rather than into me.

I made it into the common area when rammed straight into Pixis. Shit. “Sorry,” I said quickly before running past him. I saw a fireball coming straight for me and I knew it was too late to stop it from hitting me. Bumping into Pixis distracted me. I just shut my eyes. This was going to sting a little.

I opened my eyes a moment later and saw that I was surrounded by a see-through light purplish teal bubble. I looked up and saw Jean was also in one. I looked back over to Pixis who was standing there tapping his foot as he looked at us.

“You two are adults and you still act so childish,” he rolled his eyes.

“He started it,” Jean whined.

“And I’m ending it,” Pixis said. He wasn’t actually mad I could tell he was more amused by the situation.

“If you want to fight do it in the sparing circle so others can’t get hit by your fireballs or your gravity fields,” he said looking between the two of us.

“I can’t Eren cheats,” Jean grumbled.

“I don’t cheat, I'm just better than you,” I said sticking my tongue out.

Jean’s mouth dropped open and I saw as he tried to throw a fireball at me but it just exploded around the inside of his bubble.

“Hey dumbass it’s called a forcefield for a reason,” I laughed at him. I felt a wave of cockiness even though a moment ago I was running for my life. Thank god Pixis has him contained he would be frying my ass right about now if not.

“Who are you calling a dumbass Mr. I can’t even remember to wear the one thing keeping my arms from being destroyed.”

“Oh yeah like you’re any better Mr. I overdo it to the point I lose feeling in my hands,” I said snapping back.

“Oh really, that’s where you’re going with this.” He said staring me down, “how about Mr. I make impulsive and reckless decisions and then suck my friends into it.”

“Ha speaking of impulsive, who made someone switch rooms just so he could get dicked down by his boyfriend.”

“Oh like that didn’t benefit you too. You literally get dicked down by the person whose room you switched into.

“Tmi,” I heard Pixis whisper before he let out a sigh. “Why do I even bother.” he rolled his eyes before letting the force fields down. Fuck. I started running again. Jean right behind me.

“Should we stop them?” I heard Marco say behind us.

“Nah, I’m sure they’ll be fine,” Levi laughed, “besides this is way too entertaining to stop.”

Eventually, we tired ourselves out running around to the point we both gave up and just sat on the ground next to each other. “You're still an asshole,” Jean mumbled.

“And you're still a dick,” I laughed.

“Did you really have to bring up me and Marco fucking in front of Pixis?”

“Did you really have to bring up my impulsive and reckless behavior?”

“Oh well, we both pushed each other’s buttons equally,” he shrugged.

“Truce?” I asked.

“Truce. For now.”

Marco and Levi finally walked over to us and helped us off the floor. “That was quite the show,” Marco laughed.

“The scorch marks on the wall really sell it,” Levi said looking around, “I think you both proved our point from our conversation a little while back.”

“Oh, you mean the one where we said if they were in a relationship they would end up killing each other?” Marco asked.

“Yup that one.”

“I think we proved our point too,” Jean laughed.

“Which point was that?” Levi raised an eyebrow.

“That if we were in a relationship we would be the best at hate fucking.”

We all just let out a sigh. “You’re right, but that doesn’t mean you should say it,” Levi shook his head.

We all just laughed this whole silly thing off and headed back to Levi and my room. We wanted to spend the rest of our free day not trying to kill each other but just relaxing.


	78. Revenge

Eren was really exhausted and while we were all hanging out and talking I felt as his thoughts slowed to a stop and I looked over and saw him sleeping peacefully with his head on my shoulder. I looked up at Jean when I heard his thoughts and just rolled my eyes. “What happened to your truce?” I asked.

“I said truce, but I never said for how long,” he laughed.

Marco let out a disappointed sigh before stepping back. “Here they go again,” he mumbled.

“Now Levi if you would kindly step aside,” he asked.

I sighed but moved aside. I mean Eren did start this and it’s been a while since Jean’s gotten payback for any of his pranks.

“Fine, but don’t destroy the room,” I said, joining Marco a few feet away. Jean wrapped his arms around Eren and at first, it looked like nothing was happening, but I could tell what he was doing from the start his thoughts were so loud it was hard not to listen. Marco was looking on a little curious about what he was up to.

I think he caught on when Eren started sweating. “That’s mean,” Marco whispered but made sure to hold back his laughter.

Eren moved around in his sleep as he started to get uncomfortable. He was practically drenched in sweat when his eyes finally opened, but Jean didn’t stop there he just tightened his grip and kept heating him up.

“Asshole, let go,” Eren said trying to get him off but Jean held him close and gave him a smile.

“What I can’t hug my friend?” He asked innocently.

“You can hug me without boiling my blood,” he said and Jean shook his head.

“Where’s the fun in that,” he asked before giving him a big kiss on the cheek, “don’t you love me, buddy?”

“I’m going to punch you,” Eren warned.

“How are you going to do that when I’ve got you pinned?”

“Like this,” Eren said before flipping the gravity holding Jean tightly so he couldn’t escape and making sure to keep his own head tucked into Jean’s chest as Jean’s head hit the ceiling. The gravity went back to normal and they both fell back on the bed and Eren quickly got away from him as he was left there rubbing his head.

“Cheap shot,” Jean groaned. I could feel the growing headache.

“Now if you want an actual hug I’ll give you one,” Eren teased.

“You can fuck off,” Jean rolled his eyes collapsing backward on the bed as he tried to get the room to stop spinning.

“You didn’t kill him did you?” I asked.

“Nah he’s got a thick skull he’ll be fine,” Eren laughed it off and Jean flipped him off.

I thought they would leave it there until Eren had a thought flash through his mind. “Don’t” I whispered, but it was too late. Eren was already mid-air over Jean.

He jumped right on him knocking the wind right out of him before yelling, “dogpile.”

“Son of a bitch,” Jean breathed out trying to get the air back into his lungs.

I watched as Marco laughed and shook his head. Before walking over and lightly flopping down on top of the two of them, “dogpile,” he said quietly, being a lot more gentle with it. They both looked at me waiting for me to join in when I saw Jean look up.

“You might as well,” he laughed.

“If you insist,” I said walking over and sitting on the bed next to them before laying back over them. Marco must have felt how hot Jean and Eren were and I felt him start cooling everyone down. It helps to have friends who are literal heaters and ice packs.

We went back to small talk, but I could see both Eren and Jean fighting off sleep. Neither wanted the other to get revenge again so they both just decided to be tired together. It was funny to watch them open their eyes wide whenever they started to shut. I watched as they both stared each other down when they noticed the other start slipping. It was like watching two toddlers fighting off sleep.

Marco and I tried to keep the conversation going, but after a while, we just stopped to watch them.

“Why did we stop talking?” Jean finally asked after a few minutes of silence went by. I could tell he desperately needed a distraction to not fall asleep.

“Yeah, what gives?” Eren asked, fighting off a yawn.

Marco started another conversation but after a few minutes, it was back to just me and him talking as the other two stared down the wall trying to just get their eyes to focus on something.

“It sure is a pathetic sight isn’t it?” I whispered and Marco nodded.

“They can’t even hear us because they are too busy trying not to be the first to fall asleep.”

Finally, Jean cracked and let out a big yawn. Eren’s eyes shot over to him and just stared him down. “What the fuck are you looking at?” Jean asked making sure to widen his eyes so they wouldn’t close on him.

“Nothing,” Eren said looking away trying to keep the grin off his face. He thought he was winning, but in reality, both of them are just as exhausted as the other.

“They are making me tired,” I mumbled.

“They’re making me tired too and I don’t even have your power,” Marco shook his head.

“Good lord, will you guys just give it up already and take a damn nap?”

“Never,” they both said.

“Well, we finally found something they agree about.” Marco laughed.

I just laid back and shook my head they were going to be at it all day if they kept it up, hell I wouldn’t put it past them to stay up all night just staring each other down. If that’s what this comes to them Marco and I will gladly go to his room and sleep there if they want to continue their petty stand-off.

Despite their pranks and staring competition, I was having a lot of fun just being in the same room watching this happen. I can’t recall the last time we’ve had this much free time to just talk without a worry in the world. It was nice to have a day where we could all just relax and talk or even just sit in moments of silence without having to worry about our next mission or looking over our shoulder even if it was just for a brief moment.

I closed my eyes as the pleasant silence surrounded us. It was a moment for us all to take a breather after a stressful day. When I opened my eyes only a few minutes had passed, but I couldn’t help but laugh. I guess the silence was even more peaceful for Eren and Jean. Both of them were out like a light in the middle of the bed practically laying on top of each other. I just looked up at Marco who was smiling at them. He looked up at me and just shrugged, “You tired?”

“I could go for a nap,” I said and we both nodded getting comfortable on the small cramped bed cuddling up next to our boyfriend and closing our eyes.

“Sleep well,” Marco whispered.

“You too,” I said before closing my eyes. I couldn’t help but let out a small laugh.

“What?”

“Nothing, I just, a few years ago I was trying so desperately to stay away from everyone and here I am about to take a nap in the same bed as three other people.”

“Life is full of surprises,” Marco smile.

“It sure is,” I ran my fingers through Eren’s hair, “not all of them are bad.”

“Yeah not all of them,” Marco said caressing Jean’s cheek.

To think I would count this moment as one of the top 5 best moments of my life is kinda shitty since we are in the middle of a whole war and all that. I think the only moments that can beat it is that picnic with Farlan and Isabel, Mom and me reuniting, and when Eren and I started dating.

I closed my eyes and just held him closer. Moments like these make me forget how shitty the world can be. The whole world goes silent and it’s just Eren, my friends, and me. Nothing else matters right now. As I started to feel sleep take over I just hoped that this moment would last that there wouldn’t be any horrible news when we woke up. Just one day of peace and pure bliss is all I ask.

I guess we will have to see when we do wake up whether that be in an hour, in the middle of the night, or in the morning. I guess that depends on how tired everyone is.


	79. Spill the Secret

I opened my eyes and felt something heavy on my chest. I let my eyes adjust and... wait this isn't my room? I looked down and... that's not my boyfriend. Why is Eren's head on my chest? I thought before looking around the room. Well, we are in his room. I felt an arm draped around me and turned my head. Sure enough, Marco was sleeping peacefully on the other side of me. I lifted my head to look over the other side of Eren and yup there was Levi with his arms around Eren. I guess we all must have fallen asleep.

Makes sense Eren and I were exhausted. Wait Levi and Marco didn't look tired though... did they see us fall asleep and just decide to lay next to us? I let a smile slip onto my face. A part of me thought maybe Marco and I should head back to our room, but the other part of me really just wanted to lay my head back down and relax and let everyone else get some sleep. The last part of me wanted to fuck with Eren a little.

I held back my desire to do that and just laid back staring at the ceiling and running my fingers through Marco's hair. After a few minutes of doing nothing and Eren being right there, I couldn't help myself. I had to fuck with him just a little.

I poked his cheek lightly and when he didn't move I pulled my hand back. Why can't I just let him sleep? I thought for a moment because that's too easy. I gave his cheek another poke and he wrinkled his nose, but he was still asleep.

"Pst, hey fuckface are you up?" I whispered poking his cheek one last time.

"Fuck you want?" he mumbled out. I don't even know if he was awake or not.

"Just wanted you to see how cute our boyfriends are," I said and his eyes opened. "So we fell asleep, and they decided to just lay down right next to us rather than wake us up."

He looked around and when he saw them he smiled. "They're so adorable," he said before plopping his head back down on my chest. "Now sshh pillows shouldn't talk," he closed his eyes and I just stared at him.

"You have some nerve to be a dick to me as you're trying to use me as your pillow."

"You started it fuckface," he said, looking me in the eyes.

"Fair enough," I nodded. Didn't think he heard me call him that.

Despite him trying he couldn't go back to sleep, but that didn't stop him from pretending just to annoy me by keeping his head on my chest. Jokes on him I really didn't mind. I just rolled my eyes and kept running my fingers through Marco's hair.

I kept staring at Marco. Where my fingers were in his hair. If I weren't looking I wouldn't even be able to tell I was touching him. I miss being able to feel his hair against my hand. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before looking back down at him. It doesn't matter if I can feel it or not. He can feel it and that alone is enough.

He looked so peaceful while he slept. He just looked so relaxed. Not to mention so handsome. His messy bedhead was always a precious sight. Usually, he's so put together so seeing his hair all messed up always makes me smile. His chest rising and falling. With every breath came a breeze of cool air against me and it made me feel at home. I swear sleeping without him next to me would be miserable. I overheat so much so unless he's next to me I'm roasting my ass off. Even his arm that was around me felt nice.

I'm surprised Eren can keep his head on my chest without roasting. Maybe it's cold tonight? I can't really tell.

"Hey, Eren? Is it cold in here?" I asked out of curiosity.

"Yeah, why?"

"No reason just wondering," I mumbled. I looked over at Levi and in this dark room I could barely make out anything, but from what I could he was cuddled up against Eren, and his hair was just as messy as Marco's. Now that's a sight I rarely see. Usual Levi is such a neat freak seeing even a hair out of place is weird.

I saw his eyes pop open and they were looking right at me. I quickly looked away before looking back noticing something was off. I looked back at him and noticed he was looking at me, but it's more like he was looking right through me. He looked like his breathing had picked up too. I was about to ask him if he was okay when Eren's eyes shot open and his head popped up off my chest and whipped around to face him.

"What's wrong babe?" he asked. Levi didn't respond at first; he just blinked trying to get his eyes to focus on Eren. "It's okay I'm right here.

I felt movement beside me and turned my head to see Marco sitting up. We both turned our heads to look at Levi to see if he was calming down. His breathing was starting to even out a little, but he clung to Eren as if his life depended on it.

"I'm okay, it was just a dream" he mumbled more trying to convince himself. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," he said I don't think he even realized that both Eren and I were already awake before this.

"Don't apologize for having a nightmare dumbass," I rolled my eyes.

"What Jean means is it's okay," Marco glared at me.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Eren asked, ignoring both of us.

"Not really," he sighed. "I just need to clear my head," Levi said, slipping out of the bed. He got up and put on his jacket.

"Why is it so fucking cold," he asked letting out a little shiver. "You'd think the room temperature would even out with the both of you in here," he forced out a laugh. Somethings wrong. He's acting strange. Either that dream affected him more than he cares to admit or he's hiding something.

His head shot towards me and he looked me in the eyes before forcing his eyes away from mine and turning away. "I need to go for a walk."

"Mind if I join you?" I asked and I could tell he didn't want me to go, but he didn't say it.

"Sure knock yourself out," he mumbled.

I quickly got up and put my shoes on. I nodded to both Eren and Marco who were sticking behind under the covers. Once we started walking down the halls I realized it was late. I didn't notice how late it was but no one else was awake and it was so dark everywhere.

I waited until we got away from the rooms before I started talking. The last thing I wanted to do was wake anyone up. "So you want to tell me what's happening since you don't want to tell Eren?" I asked.

"What makes you think I don't wanna tell Eren?"

"Cause if you did you would have told him already."

"Maybe it was just cause you two were in the room," he said looking me in the eyes.

"But it's not."

He looked away and just crossed his arms. He looked freezing. Was it really that cold in here? He went silent for a minute just staring at the ground. "I just don't know if I can tell anyone," he finally mumbled his eyes falling to the floor.

"You know you can always tell us."

"Not this time. It's more complicated than that."

"Fine, if you feel like you can't tell them just know you can tell me."

He went silent again and it looked like he was actually debating about it. Finally, he brought his eyes back up to mine. "Okay, then it's your turn to keep a secret for me."

"My lips are sealed."

I watched as he closed his eyes and clenched his jaw. He was working the courage up to tell me. "I just found something out not long ago and now I'm having nightmares again."

"About what?" he was being very vague.

"Ilsa."

All of my muscles tightened for a moment. That was still a sore topic for a lot of us. "What on earth could you have found out that is giving you nightmares again?"

"I found out she's still around," he said and it looked like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

"She- what. No that's not possible Ymir would have-."

"No she wouldn't," He cut me off.

"She's known this whole time and hasn't told anyone. How could she just keep that a secret? She-."

"Jean stop," Levi said, his voice a faint whisper. "This is why she isn't telling anyone. She has some good reasons for not telling us. Most of us haven't finished grieving and-."

"Well if we knew sooner then we wouldn't have to grieve," I said feeling my blood start to boil quite literally. I could see Levi looked warmer already. I took a deep breath and tried to calm down.

"That's not true. Everyone needed to grieve without that process we would be worse off in the long run."

"Well, why did she tell you if she wasn't going to tell anyone?"

"She didn't, I found out because she was acting weird and I just put the pieces together." Levi shook his head before looking back down at the ground, "This isn't the point. The point is Ymir and I are the only two who know she's around and ever since I feel like I'm seeing her everywhere when I'm not. I keep hearing her voice but I know it's just my imagination."

"So the nightmare?"

"She was alive. We were sitting back at the school and everything was going great but all of a sudden some guards came up from behind us two of them grabbed me and two of them grabbed her. She was being dragged away. They were holding me down on my knees and my powers weren't working. I watched her kick and scream. She kept calling my name and begged me to help her. A man with a gun walked up and all I could do was watch as they shot her. She fell over lifeless and when her body hit the floor is when I forced myself awake. I tried so hard to just force my eyes open before that but they wouldn't budge."

I heard as his voice cracked and I even saw tears in his eyes. I felt tears in my own eyes and for a moment I wasn't sure if it was just from him affecting me or if they were my own. I realize they were both.

"Levi," I whispered out but I couldn't find anything else to say. I'm not good at this. I don't know how to comfort people. I don't have any fancy words to make everything better. I did the only thing I could think of to show him that I want to help and I care despite not knowing how to say it. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him into a hug.

"You're warm," he laughed trying to break the awkward silence but I felt as he hugged me back clinging to my shirt as he closed his eyes and just let the tears silently fall.

"You mean I'm hot," I said before realizing that this was probably not the time to joke around.

"It's the perfect time to joke around," Levi corrected my thoughts. "It made me feel better. Even if it's not true."

"How dare you," I laughed, "here I am trying to make you feel better and you are trying to make me feel bad?"

"Making you feel bad makes me feel better," he said and I raised an eyebrow.

"Well, it's hard to argue with that logic," I shrugged.

He just started laughing before whispering, "you're a great friend. Thank you."

"Don't mention it. Don't worry I won't say anything about Ilsa," I said reassuring him that my lips were sealed. "We should start heading back before the other two freeze their asses to come find us."

"I think it's safe to say Marco's already freezing his ass off."

We headed back towards the room and Levi tried his hardest to make it look like he wasn't crying. It was easier since he wasn't full-on sobbing; it was just a little redness that we could pass off as him being cold and the blood rushing to his cheeks or something.

When we came back in, Marco and Eren's heads shot back to look at us.

"Who's ready for nap part two?" I asked. Finding out your friend who died is still around really drains a person's energy.

"I'm always up for more sleep," Eren said flopping back on the bed jokingly but as we crawled into bed I heard his tone change to a more serious one as he whispered to Levi.

"You're okay right?"

"I'm fine, just needed to walk around and get that nightmare out of my mind. Jean helped by talking the whole time."

"Sounds like something he'd do," Eren laughed.

"Should we go back to our own room?" I asked.

"Hell no, we need in here," Eren said and I could hear him shivering.

I rolled my eyes and looked at Marco. "It's up to you," I said leaving my fate in his hands. He decides if I have one person clinging to me or three.

Eren and Levi both looked at Marco and gave him puppy dog eyes. Marco just laughed before looking at me. "I'm comfortable here, I'd rather not jump into a freezing cold bed when it takes me so long to get warm."

I let out a little sigh and laid back on the bed, "alright everyone come close," I said and they wasted no time to cuddle up next to me. I just wrapped my arms around everyone and closed my eyes. It felt nice to have everyone around me. It was nice to actually feel wanted. "Maybe we could talk Pixis into getting some heaters or something so I don't have to do this every time the temperature drops."

"Heaters require electricity," Marco laughed, "besides I know you love it. I also like it when people ask me to give them a hug when it's hot out."

I just rolled my eyes. Since I knew I couldn't lie to him and say I hate it.   
"Whatever, just go to sleep already."

Everyone fell asleep really quickly. I thought I might have trouble getting back to bed after finding out about Ilsa, but I was actually able to get to sleep fairly quickly.


	80. Early Morning Talk

I woke up and looked around. It must have been really early in the morning but I couldn’t sleep anymore for the life of me. Everyone else was still sleeping so I decided to quietly slip out of the bed. I gave Eren a kiss on the cheek before getting ready. I had to throw my jacket on since it was still really cold. I didn’t realize how cold it was until I left the warm bed. What makes it even worse is the second I leave the room it will be even colder. Any room that Jean's in is always a little warmer.

I took a deep breath and prepared myself for the cold hallway before walking into it. I was right it was freezing out here. I don’t know how some of the others here can sleep alone in these rooms. I mean our blankets were made to trap heat in them but still, it blows my mind.

I headed towards Pixis’s office even though I wasn’t sure if he was even up yet, but I thought I should check.

I walked into his office and he was awake… or not. He was sitting at his desk, but he was dead asleep. I guess he stayed up all night trying to get some stuff done. Before I could make up my mind on whether I wanted to leave and let him sleep or wake him up and tell him to go to bed his head shot up and he looked at me. “Oh, Levi,” he said, blinking trying to get his eyes to adjust. “Sorry how long were you standing there?” he asked, rubbing his eyes.

“I just walked in.”

“Oh,” he sat up and cleared his throat. “How can I help?” He stood up and walked over to me. I think he just wanted an excuse to get up and stretch his legs. His face was pale and I was surprised he wasn’t shivering. With my jacket on I was still freezing and here he was with a short sleeve t-shirt.

“I was just wondering if we were going to be doing the hand to hand combat training today?”

“Yes, I figured I would ask Sasha if she can lend some of her doubles so no one gets hurt.”

“So do we know when we are planning the missions?”

“Well, I figured we would see how today goes and see how much practice everyone needs before we plan the exact day for the mission.”

He had a point. We don’t know how much practice some people would need and we don’t want to stress anyone out by giving them a time limit. We all just need to focus on practicing until we get this down. Now a few of us are already pretty good at hand to hand combat, but some of us need to focus on practicing other aspects, and some of us need to practice both.

“So how are we going to decide who needs to practice what?” I asked after my thoughts had drifted off from the current topic.

“What do you mean?” Pixis asked and I realized that was a random topic jump since I was thinking rather than talking.

“Well, some people need to practice their powers and some need to practice hand to hand and others need to practice both,” I quickly explained. “So how do we figure out who needs to do what?”

Pixis just stared for a moment as his brain took a moment to process. I could see the gears in his head turning as he processed my question. “Maybe we have a look at what everyone can do?”

“Like a little demonstration?” I asked.

“Exactly.

“We could have Sasha’s doubles step in for most of the demonstration, but for those who can’t demonstrate on doubles we might run into issues,” I said remembering that not everyone's powers will work on them.

“Oh,” Pixis said quietly as it clicked.

“Well, I could always step forward as long as they don’t hurt me too bad,” I offered.

Pixis was about to shut my offer down without hearing me out, “I mean I have a higher pain tolerance than most and I’ve been on the receiving end of a few people's powers already.”

“Who’s?” he asked and I forgot that no one ever told him that my dumbass decided to give Hanna’s powers a try out of nothing but curiosity.

“Hanna’s,” I said and he raised an eyebrow. “I was curious.”

“How did that go?”

“Better than you’d expect. I found out that because my backlashes have some of the same effects that I’m more immune to her powers. Not totally immune but it takes a lot more to knock me out.”

“Well, I guess that’s a good thing to have figured out before today, however, I’m still not sold on you putting yourself on the line for people to test their powers. Especially not with your arm already messed up.”

“Well, for everything except my arm we could have Hanji go last and she could heal me for her demonstration,” I laughed.

“Well, I guess that’s true,” he said but he still didn’t seem convinced.

“Look, we need someone to do it, and I’d rather it be me since I can definitely take a beating.”

Pixis let out a sigh. “It sounds like you’ve already made up your mind.”

“I have and you aren’t talking me out of it,” I said, staring him down.

“Fine,” he rolled his eyes, “but if it gets to be too much then I’m putting a stop to it,” he said.

“Wait you actually agreed?” I was surprised. I never thought he would agree to one of my reckless plans.

“Yes, but only because I know that Eren is going to kick your ass for this later,” he said and my heart dropped.

“Oh, I didn’t think about that.” He was right Eren was going to kill me.

“Well if you excuse me I have to go plan my funeral,” I said, turning to head out.

“Have fun with that,” he laughed before going back to sit at his desk. I headed out of the room and walked back towards my room. Someone in there had to be away right? If not it will be nice to get warmed up a little just by walking into the room. When I walked in sure enough Jean was awake but he was still stuck in the bed under Marco and Eren. He couldn’t get out of the bed without waking one or both of them.

“Help me,” he whispered looking up at me.

“You’re on your own,” I laughed before sitting on the bed next to Eren. I ran my fingers through his hair and put my hand up against his cheek. His face was so warm.

I heard Jean’s thoughts and instantly stopped. He watched me touch Eren’s face before turning his head away. His thoughts weren’t intentional. He was jealous and a little depressed. I realized how insensitive that might have been. I didn’t even think about it.

“Sorry,” Jean whispered. “You heard that,” he said remembering I could hear thoughts. “I guess I still haven't fully accepted it just yet, but don’t think you have to walk on eggshells around me. I just need to accept that this is how things are, I mean it’s not so bad.”

“Still this is a learning process for everyone. We do want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable. We just want to help. If we do something that does make you feel uncomfortable please let us know.”

“I don’t want you guys to change the way you are because of me. I’m not going to be in denial forever and I’m sure that I can get over this eventually.”

“Okay, well until then let us know. Like you said it’s not forever but we want to make sure to be as helpful as we can while you are adjusting,” I said, giving him a smile.

“Thanks,” he mumbled.

After everyone woke up we all headed to breakfast. Pixis announced there to everyone that we would be practicing today. Thank god he left the part out that I would be the test dummy, or Eren would have killed me then and there.

“So we all have to do a demonstration, how is that going to work when some of our powers won’t work on Sasha’s doubles?” Eren mumbled. Jean and Marco both shrugged.

I just looked at the ground and mumbled, “I don’t know, maybe Pixis has a plan around that.” I tried not to be so obvious despite feeling like I was. I looked up and no one even noticed they were all more focused on eating. Okay good, I thought to myself before going back to finishing my own food.


	81. Hand-to-Hand Combat

I finished eating and left the others to finish their food. I headed over to Pixis and Shadis to see if they needed help setting up and where this would take place. I thought they might decide to do this down in the training area, but they could also be deciding to do this in the sparring area. When I walked up it seemed they answered that question for me as they talked about getting the sparring area ready.

When Pixis looked at me I could tell there was a slight change of plan before he even told me. “So for the hand-to-hand combat we aren’t going to use Sasha’s doubles anymore,” He said and I stared at him confused.

“Why not?”

“Well, Sasha’s doubles can o0nly do as much as Sasha. So to accurately gauge everyone's skills we have to be the ones to do it,” Pixis said looking to Shadis.

“So everyone has to fight you two?” I asked.

“Either us or Nanaba, she also offered to help.”

She walked over to us not long after to help us set up. “So we were planning on doing the hand to hand demonstrations first and then move to the power demonstrations. We’ve already asked Sasha to stand by for some of those. She’s the only one who knows you will be handling some of them too,” Pixis said and I nodded.

“You haven’t told Eren?” Shadis asked me.

“No, and I don’t plan on telling him until I have to,” I shrugged. I don’t plan on telling him at all, I plan on him just finding out when they call me up.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” He asked.

“No, but it’s better than getting killed before doing the demonstrations,” I shrugged before going to check how many people were still eating. We had everything all set up so now it was just bringing everyone over to us.

There were only a few people still eating, everyone else was just chatting. “When you’re done please come over to the sparring area,” I said and people started heading over already. The rest finished up their food and joined the others.

We all lined up as Pixis explained to everyone else what we were doing. “Would anyone like to go first?” He asked.

“I’ll go first,” Erwin volunteered.

“Alright, step into the circle.”

“The goal is to get Pixis out of the circle or pinned to the ground without using your powers. If the spar goes over 3 minutes we will call it a tie,” he said and they both waited for the count down.

“I’m not gonna hold back on you, you should know how to fight,” Pixis said as the countdown started.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” Erwin smiled as the countdown ended.

As the last few seconds were approaching we started counting down from ten. When we hit zero both of them stopped. It was a tie. They were both out of breath but shook each other’s hands.

“Don’t worry, not all of these will be as long or as hard as this one,” Nanaba said, reassuring some of the others.

One by one people started going up against them. Only a few people were pinned down so far. Armin and Christa were both pinned by Nanaba. We didn’t worry too much about them being pinned since we knew both of their powers could save them if that happened.

Eren went next and I watched this match closely. He was going up against Pixis.

“Don’t hold back,” I heard Eren whisper. Shit don’t ask that.

“Wish granted,” Pixis nodded.

They counted down and Eren’s first move was to put his guard up and stay low to the ground. Pixis stayed mostly on the defensive at first. He was waiting for Eren to make the first move which obviously is a trap. Eren saw right through that and kept his distance. Waiting him out wasn’t an option though it was too easy and would get them nowhere. His mind was working hard to find an opening that would make it easy to strike without Pixis having an easy counter strike.

Eren found his opening and got close enough and at that moment Pixis let out a right hook. Eren ducked under and did a quick jab to his ribcage. While Pixis was still trying to pull his block up Eren managed to get behind him enough to hook his leg and push Pixis off balance. While Pixis tried to catch himself Eren tried to start pinning him.

Pixis got free and gave a nod, “that was a nice try,” he said, impressed at Eren’s quick thinking. “The real question is if you can get that close again?” he asked and I saw the determination flash in Eren’s eyes.

The room was dead silent as Pixis took the offensive and swung again this time keeping his guard up in case Eren tried to pull the same stunt. Eren used his arms to block Pixis’s punch as he thought of another way around his guard.

Pixis swung again and Eren moved his arms to block this new attack. He saw his opening as Pixis pulled his arm back and Eren quickly landed a kick causing Pixis to shift all of his attention to blocking. Before Pixis could readjust from the block Eren quickly switched legs and swiped Pixis’s legs out from under him.

He hit the floor hard and Eren quickly got on top of him and pinned him to the ground before looking up at Shadis and Nanaba who were left speechless. “Well alright then,” the said nodded.

Pixis smacked Eren upside the head and when he turned back around to see why Pixis just laughed, “don’t take your eyes off your opponent even if you think you already won.

“Fair enough,” Eren laughed before getting up and helping Pixis off the floor.

Jean volunteered to go next. He was going up against Shadis. Eren walked over to me with a proud smile on his face, “did you see how I took him down?” He asked excitedly. He reminded me of a kid looking for approval from their crush.

“Yes I did, you did amazing baby,” I gave him a kiss on the cheek. If he wants approval he gets approval.

They gave the countdown and the second it ended Jean gave the first punch. Shadis was easily expecting it and caught his arm and pinned it behind his back. “You can’t be that predictable boy,” he shook his head trying to give Jean some advice during the match.

Jean gave a quick elbow back with his other arm and managed to get free. “Hey old man when you pin someone's arm behind their back make sure to keep a better distance,” he said, giving Shadis some tips too.

Jean took Shadis’s warning and decided to switch it up a bit. He always led his fights with a punch so watching him step back and take more of a defensive stance was a little odd. He waited for Shadis to make the next move before countering it. Pixis kicked and Jean rather than fully blocked actually caught his foot. While holding his one foot he used his other to sweep his other leg out from under him bringing him to the ground.

Even though Shadis was on the ground he still wasn’t pinned. Shadis made no attempt to get up and Jean knew he couldn’t get in close enough to pin him to the ground without he himself being brought to the ground. He waited for Shadis to make a move as they stood at a stalemate. Jean finally found an opening and instead of pinning him the normal way he came closer to him so that when Shadis reached out to grab Jean’s leg to trip him Jean used his other leg to step on his arm. While that arm was pinned he dropped down and pinned his other arm and stayed clear of his legs.

“I guess that works,” Pixis shrugged. It’s not the cleanest pin, but Shadis can’t get up, so I guess I’ll count it.”

Jean gut up and helped Shadis up before apologizing for stepping on his arm.

“Don’t apologize, you guys are demonstrating your skills whatever it takes to bring us down do it. You don’t have to worry about hurting us.”

“That’s why we have Hanji on standby,” Pixis laughed.

A few more people went before I decided to step forward. I was going against Pixis who gave me a weird look. “You don’t have to go, we all know you can fight besides your arm is still in bad shape.” I needed to fight against Pixis cause he is the one person whose mind I can’t read.

“You think I’m going to let you guys have all the fun,” I asked. I was at a big disadvantage with my arm being messed up. Not to mention I don’t have my knives either meaning I was missing a key feature I had in my normal hand-to-hand combat. However, even with all that against me, I think I can still do this. I mean I’ve been in plenty of fights before so how is this any different.

Pixis let out a sigh and nodded. “Don’t you dare hold back,” I said already knowing he was planning to. He took a deep breath almost as if to keep his sanity, but he didn’t bother to protest my request.

I saw Eren giving me a worried look from the sidelines, but when he saw me look at him he just gave me a big smile and nodded before thinking to me you got this! He was done doubting my abilities. He's seen me beat the odds again and again and today is no different.

The countdown finished and normally I would keep a more defensive position and wait to see what the other person was planning but without my advantage of knowing what he’s thinking I had to think outside the box. Not to mention throw him off. He was expecting me to take the defensive so I went straight for an offensive play. I quickly used my leg to sweep at his feet. It caught him off guard and nearly worked. I knocked him off balance as he hastily tried to jump out of the way.

He backed up and tried to get his balance back but I struck again to keep him off balance. This time throwing a quick double jab. I threw the first punch up high by his face which he blocked before pulling my arm back in and without a second hesitation throwing another punch towards the gut. This one hit him and he stumbled back and tried to catch his breath.

Before he could have a second to catch his breath I threw a decoy punch just past his face he went to block but it was just an excuse to get closer to him and while he wasn’t watching my leg I used it to hook it behind his and kick the back of his knees. He fell to his knees and caught himself with his hands but it wasn’t enough to stop me from coming behind him and putting him in a chokehold. I looked up at Nanaba and Shadis wondering if that was enough of a pin.

They nodded and Pixis tapped my arm. I let him go and walked out of the circle over to Eren while Everyone had their jaws to the floor.

“You beat him without him even throwing a punch,” Eren said with pure shock.

“I couldn’t let him throw a punch if he did he would have aimed for the side I couldn’t block as easily,” I shrugged.

“That was amazing,” Pixis said when he was able to catch his breath. He rubbed at his throat which was probably still sore from the chokehold.

“Thanks,” I nodded.

Everyone else went and we wrote down the names of the people who would need more practice. Basically, anyone who got pushed out of the circle or pinned. So far the only people who needed practice were Armin, Christa, Thomas, Marlowe, Hanna, Mina, and Eld. Surprisingly that's a lot fewer people than we thought.

We told Petra she didn’t have to partake in the hand to hand combat training, but she thought it would be fun since she never got to do this before and it wasn’t to actually hurt people so she decided there was no harm in it. She took Shadis down before anyone even saw what happened. God forbid the day she ever decides to actually fight on a mission.

“Alright moving on to Power demonstrations,” Pixis announced. When Pixis announced that Sasha would be using her doubles for people to demonstrate on Eren’s hand shot up.

“How are some people going to practice on Sasha’s doubles when some people's powers won’t work unless it’s an actual person?” he asked.

“That’s a good question,” he asked before looking over at me. Don’t do it don’t do it don’t you fucking dare do it. I thought over and over again. “Why don’t you as Levi?” he did it that asshole really fucking did it.

Eren whipped his head around to face me. “You didn’t,” he glared me down.

“I did,” I whispered.


	82. I Can't Do It

“Bullshit,” he shook his head.

“While you start the demonstrations I’m going to go talk to Eren for a second excuse us,” I said awkwardly pulling Eren by his arm into another room to stop us from disrupting anymore.

“What the fuck were you thinking?” Eren asked.

Well, I was thinking you wouldn’t find out until they called me up. I thought then again like hell would I actually tell him that I don’t have a death wish. “Well, I have experience with mostly everyone's powers and I have a higher pain tolerance and Hanji is standing by,” I said listing off the reasons nervously not wanting to look him in the eye.

Eren just shook his head. “You’re already injured and you think this is a good idea.”

“Hey, this is actually safer than what I just did,” I said, raising an eyebrow. “You were perfectly fine with me fighting Pixis without him holding back, but this is where you draw the line?” I asked, making my point.

“That’s because I know Pixis wouldn’t purposely try and hurt you, however, powers are a little less predictable. Not everyone has perfect control of them.” Shit, that’s also a good point. I need another reason that this is a good idea… There isn’t one.

“I see your point, but I will be fine okay baby? You have to trust me.”

“You keep saying that like I don’t trust you. I do trust you, Levi, I don’t trust everyone else. I mean I know they won’t try and hurt you on purpose, but you never know what could happen.”

He sounded genuinely scared and I couldn’t blame him.

“I know, but I’ll try and be extra careful if anything starts to go wrong I’ll put a stop to it.”

Eren stayed quiet for a long time just staring at me. His mind was all over the place and his thoughts were too hard to follow. “I will only go through with this if I can do it with you. Besides two test dummies are better than one,” he said before mumbling “emphasis on the dummies.”

I wanted to say no and tell him it was way too dangerous for him but before I could open my mouth I stopped myself and realized that I sounded like such a hypocrite. How could I go through with something so reckless and tell him to trust me but then immediately tell him that it’s too reckless for him to do? “Okay,” I nodded. If that was his condition then okay. I’m not going to fight it because if I do I’ll sound like a hypocrite. Not to mention we did make a promise that dangerous missions would be done together, this isn't exactly the same thing but he could definitely argue that it was.

He nodded and we walked back into the room. It looks like Reiner just finished his demonstration. Pixis walked up with Shadis trailing behind him and asked us what happened and we told him we would both do it. I think he was expecting Eren to talk me out of it not join me in this reckless activity.

“Of course,” he sighed. He wasn’t even going to try and talk us out of it, but he looked like we just took ten years off his life. “We are going to try and get done with the people who can get by just using Sasha’s doubles first,” he said, turning back around to continue with calling the next person up.

“Excuse me,” Shadis whispered glaring at Pixis, “what do you mean of course,” he asked. “I was against this when it was just one of them, but two?”

“Shadis they will be fine,” he said, placing a hand on his shoulder. “We will be standing by to make sure nothing goes wrong. Besides Hanji is already on standby.

“Still,” Shadis mumbled before rolling his eyes. “Whatever.” He moved farther away from Pixis as they called up the next person.

We all went through a run-through of our powers, those of us who could get by on a power demonstration on the doubles. The rest waited until the end. I did part of my demonstration on a double and then realized that the rest of my demonstration would have to be done on Eren. this was a bad idea after all. I should have just given up rather than letting him go through with this.

“How many left?” Nanaba asked Pixis for a headcount. He looked at all the names he had written down and gave her a number. “Thirteen,” he said before showing her the list and calling us over to show us the list. The first name on the list was mine.

“Oh,” Eren whispered and I think he realized that I would have to use my powers on him. “Well we should probably get that one over first,” he sighed.

“We don’t have to. We know how my powers work,” I mumbled to him. The last time I used my powers on him in a bad way I gave him a panic attack.

“It’s fine,” Eren said, giving me a kiss on the cheek, “Besides it wouldn’t be the first time we had to do this,” he said, giving me a nod.

We took a deep breath and walked into the circle. “This is going to be so cool, I’ve seen Levi totally incapacitate people with his power before,” I heard a voice say and I couldn’t even place who said it.

It was a little weird having all eyes on us. We were used to having a little bit of an audience when we spar, but everyone was here just watching me waiting for me to use my powers. Waiting for me to hurt Eren. I don’t think I can do this. I don’t want to do this.

My eyes dropped to the ground and I couldn’t focus. I didn’t even notice Eren leave the circle.

“Hey, do you think you can clear the room for a moment?” I asked Pixis.

He gave a nod and told everyone to follow him into the common area. He was dismissing the people who didn’t have to wait here and telling the people who still had to demonstrate their abilities to wait at the tables. After everyone had cleared the room I walked back over to Levi who was on his knees and having trouble breathing.

Rather than demonstrate his emotions on me like he was going to he held them all in not letting any slip out and instead overwhelmed himself.

I sat on the floor next to him and spoke quietly, “baby, it’s okay, look at me.” I said seeing if he could even hear me. He was unresponsive. “I’m going to put my hand on your shoulder okay?” I said giving him a warning. I had to snap him out of whatever emotional spiral he had put himself in.

I lightly put my hand on his shoulder and instantly one of his hands shot up to hold mine. “I’m sorry I can’t do it,” he finally forced out.

“I know baby, I know,” I said scooting towards him and wrapping my arms around him. He instantly welcomed the embrace and held me tightly.

“This is so stupid, I’m sorry.”

“It’s not stupid,” I gave him a kiss on the cheeks, “you just don’t want to hurt me, I think it’s sweet.”

“Sorry to interrupt,” Pixis said reentering the room. He walked over and kneeled down next to us. “We know your power well enough that you don’t have to demonstrate, however, if you two still want to demonstrate you can but it doesn't have to be a bad emotion you put on him, any emotion works.” Pixis smiled before standing up and giving us both a hand. We gratefully took them and he helped us off the ground.

“Okay,” Levi mumbled. “Any emotion?” he asked double-checking.

“Any emotion,” Pixis nodded. Shadis and Nanaba had come back in quietly. I heard them talking about how they will just call people in so no one else has the pressure of being watched by everyone.

“Okay, I can do that,” Levi said turning towards me. He gave me a soft smile and I felt so much love surround me. Before I could tell him how cute that was I erupted in laughter.

“I love seeing you smile.” I heard him say as he walked up and grabbed my hands. I stopped laughing and he stopped pushing the overwhelming happiness on me and instead just left the feeling of pure love.

“That was a good demonstration,” Nanaba said with a big smile as we walked out of the circle.

“Let’s get on with the rest of them,” Levi nodded

I had to agree, but not before whispering in his ear, “After we are done with this I really want to show you how much I love you too.”

He gave me a really big smile before whispering back, “I’d love that.”


	83. Power Demonstration

“I think we should start with someone easy,” Pixis said before looking at his list. He showed it to Nanaba and pointed at a name and she disappeared into the other room to grab the person.

“So what exactly are your plans for tonight?” I asked trying to see how much more I could get Eren to tell me.

“I guess you will have to wait and see,” he whispered before distracting his mind so I couldn’t see anything.

“You really aren’t going to give me any hints?”

“Nope.”

Eren’s thoughts changed to Franz and I looked behind me to see him walking into the room. “I was about to say why are you thinking of another man,” I joked. I saw his cheeks go red before I turned around to great Franz.

“So for your demonstration, we are going to have you cancel out someone's power and duplicate the other's power,” Pixis said.

“Do I get to choose?” Franz asked. I don’t blame him, I wouldn’t want to copy my powers. Especially not the mind-reading. The one time he’s tried to copy that power of mine he passed out almost instantly.

“Sure, I don’t see why not,” he shrugged.

He walked up to me and gave me a smile, “Mind if I get rid of your powers for a moment?” He asked.

I put my hand out for him to touch and let him look me in the eyes. All of the voices disappeared and I’ve never heard the world quieter. There was nothing. No voices, no overwhelming emotions. I didn’t expect this to feel so… so… empty. I looked up at Eren who just gave me a worried look.

I couldn’t hear what he was thinking. That’s all I ever wanted for as long as I had these powers was pure silence, but now that I have it I hate it. I just want to hear Eren’s thoughts in my head.

“You okay?” Eren asked, putting a hand on my shoulder.

“Yeah, it just feels weird,” I mumbled reminding myself that it was only for ten minutes. After Franz has been working at his powers he was able to double his time which was great for the most part, but not for me who is desperately waiting for the timer to be up.

Eren held his hand out for Franz and let him copy his power. “Just be careful, remember last time you copied my power?” Eren reminded him.

“Yeah, it packs more of a punch than I thought. “I nearly gave myself a concussion when I tried to make myself weightless.

“Nearly?” I asked, “I clearly remember Hanji telling you that you actually did give yourself a concussion.” I reminded him.

“Really,” he asked, “I don’t remember. Must have been the concussion,” he shrugged.

“Speaking of can one of you guys grab Hanji,” Shadis said with a little more panic in his voice. Shadis ran out of the room to grab her.

I watched as Pixis put a piece of paper on the food and backed away. “I know you don’t have much experience with Eren’s powers, but can you try not to injure anyone?

“I’ll try my best,” Franz said. He didn’t sound very confident.

I backed away since I didn’t have my powers to protect me from anything going bad. I stood bad behind Eren and saw him give me a smile before a confused look went across his face. “Oh. right,” I heard him mumbled.

“What?”

“I forgot you can’t hear my thoughts,” he said awkwardly. Guess I wasn’t the only one who thought this was weird.

I never knew that Franz’s power felt like this on people. I mean maybe it’s different for me than the others since my powers I can feel constantly whereas they can’t. I mean when he erases someone like Annie’s power she can’t feel it because she’s not always using it, but I always use my power whether I want to or not.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up to see Pixis looking at me.

“We will be right back,” he said to the others, giving Shadis a nod probably to tell him to take over. That’s when I realized that my whole body was trembling.

We walked into his office and he had me sit down. “You're not handling this very well, are you?”

‘No, not really,” I mumbled. “This is all I ever wanted, but now-” I let my voice drift off.

“You can’t stand it?” he asked, trying to finish my sentence.

“Yeah.” I let out a sigh. “I know it’s only for a few minutes, but not being able to feel Eren’s emotions or his thoughts when he’s right next to me just hurts. It feels so… lonely.” I hate this feeling. I hate not knowing. I hate-. “Is this how everyone feels?” I asked.

“Well, no one else here has the power to read minds or feel emotions,” Pixis shrugged. “So more or less, yes this is how everyone feels.”

Something in my mind clicked. I mean I knew that no one else had my ability but it has truly never clicked for me that they can’t physically feel how people feel and they genuinely don’t know what people think. They can’t hear when people are thinking about them. They can’t feel when people care like I can. Normal people truly can’t tell what people are feeling or thinking unless they are told. “No wonder people feel so alone all the time.”

“I think it’s just hitting you harder since you are used to feeling what others can’t.”

We waited a few more minutes for me to calm fully down and when we walked back out I still couldn’t feel anything. I walked closer to Eren but even standing a few feet away I still can’t feel anything. I took a few deep breaths and reminded myself that time is almost up that it would just be a few minutes.

These ten minutes dragged on for hours it felt like. When everything finally came back I breathed a sigh of relief as Eren’s thought once again popped into my mind. They mostly were concerned thoughts about me.

I didn’t tell anyone that my powers returned, I could tell Pixis noticed right away seeing the relief wash over me, but Eren had his back to me. It was interesting to see his thoughts when he thought no one could hear them. He truly loves me and his thoughts show that. There wasn’t a moment when I left his mind.

The paper that Franz was working with hit the floor. “Oh I guess times up,” he mumbled.

“Well you definitely are doing better with my power,” Eren smiled, “you didn’t hurt anyone today so that’s definitely an improvement,” he joked.

“I could actually get the damn thing off the ceiling and to float even if it was higher than we wanted,” he said proud of himself.

“Could you go grab Rico on your way out?” Pixis asked, looking at the list.

“You’re going to have Rico test her powers on these two?” Nanaba asked, a little nervous.

“Is that a problem?” Pixis asked.

“I doubt she will go through with that.”

“She’s right,” Rico said from the doorway. “If you brought me in here to use my powers on those idiots it’s not going to happen. It’s too dangerous,” she said. She was debating about turning right back around.

“Idiots,” I heard Eren mumbled next to me, a little offended.

“She’s not wrong,” I shrugged. I mean we are idiots.

Nanaba just shrugged as if to tell Pixis, I told you so.

“Well, alright then,” Pixis sighed, “I mean we know you are more than capable so I guess it’s okay,” he nodded and she left the room without another word but her thoughts were complaining about wasting her time.

Nanaba followed her out to grab the next person to bring in. She repeated with Eld following behind her.

I don’t see how my power will help in this mission so why do I need to demonstrate it? He thought to me rather than strain his voice.

“Because everyone's powers can help in some way. Who knows maybe you could silence a guard from alerting someone else?” I shrugged.

He just sighed and nodded. He looked at me and waited for me to start talking so he could quickly do his demonstration and leave. “Okay I guess I should start tal-” My voice cut out and I couldn’t speak. It felt like someone was physically holding my throat and stopping me from talking. It was like I was being choked but I could still breathe.”

He stopped and I felt words come out of my mouth. “That was weird,” I said realizing that I could talk again.

He put his hand to his chest and made a circular motion. “Sorry” he signed. It’s not the most pleasant feeling, he thought before Pixis told him who to bring in. He left and a few moments later Thomas came in.

Oh, this one should be easy. I thought. He was just going to connect Eren’s mind to mine. Wait. That’s not a good thing. What if Eren gets overloaded because of everyone else's thoughts. No, you have to think about what you want to say to the other person directly so it shouldn’t do that… right.

Thomas walked up and nodded waiting for us to tell him that we’re ready. I looked at Eren and made sure he was ready before we both gave him a nod. I felt Eren’s thoughts in my head the same as normal, but it was a little different. It was like we were in a room. The few times I’ve seen this happen I was never in the room with them. It was more like I was peeking in through a window or something. It felt weird to actually be there and a part of this.

Now I can hear you with just your thoughts, Eren thought and I smiled.

This should be interesting. I thought back. Pixis let us test the power for a minute before asking if Thomas should break the connection.

We both nodded. We didn’t need multiple powers affecting us at once. I watched the room disappear and I could tell we were back to normal. It was kinda nice having a conversation with Eren only in our heads.

The next person in was Gunther. He never was a ray of sunshine. I mean neither am I, but he takes grumpy to a whole new level. He walked up to us with his arms already crossed and an annoyed look on his face. “Alright let’s get this over with.”

Someone sounds chipper. I thought to myself. I knew he wouldn’t be in the best mood but he seemed really annoyed inside and out. Even his thoughts were annoyed. He thought this was a huge waste of time and he just wanted to go back to his room.

“What do we need to do for your power to work?” I asked.

“Just answer my questions,” he said and we nodded.

He looked between us and then looked me in the eyes and asked me, “Do you love Eren?”

Yes of course more than anything else in the world. Is what I wanted to say, but what came out of my mouth was completely different. “No of course not I hate his guts and would rather die than be with him.” I sat there blinking trying to figure out what just happened when Eren started laughing.

“Well damn tell me how you really feel.” Eren laughed. His thoughts were a little offended at first until he realized Gunther made me lie.

“And you?” he asked, turning to Eren. “How do you feel about Levi?”

I don’t want to answer that. I heard Eren think. “I hate him more than I hate anything else. I wish he would die,” he said and shook his head.

I knew Gunther made him lie, but it still stung to hear those words come out of Eren’s mouth. His thoughts on the other hand were telling me how much he loved me and apologizing for those horrible words.

“Wow, you guys must really love each other. Usually the stronger the truth u want to tell the stronger the lie.” He nodded, almost impressed. Now for the truths, he thought before turning to Eren. “What's something you’ve wanted to tell him but never had the guts to,” he asked.

“I’ve never wanted to get married and I actually hated the idea of marriage until I met you. Now all I can think about is the day when we can finally get married and get away from all this.”

“And you?” he asked before I even had time to respond to what Eren said.

“You are the only reason I’m fighting this hard. I couldn’t care less about what happened to me, but I fight like hell to make this world better for you.” I felt the words spill out of my mouth and the room went quiet.

“Well my work here is done,” he said before walking out of the now silent room all eyes were on me. His thoughts weren’t as cold as his actions. He actually felt a little guilty not realizing we would get that deep with it.

“Levi,” Eren mumbled but I just shook his head.

“We will talk about both of those answers later,” I said with a nod, “but right now we need to get through the rest of this.”

“Okay,” Eren said with a nod.

The next person to walk in was Christa. She walked straight up to us and gave us a smile. “You ready?”

“Yup,” I lied. Her power scared me.

“Don’t worry I’ll be nice,” she laughed.

“You both feel that your legs aren’t stable so you need to sit down,” she said. Eren plopped on the ground instantly, but I hesitated for a moment thinking about it. I still moved without wanting to, but it was a lot slower of a response. She looked just as confused as I felt.

“That’s weird,” she mumbled. “Does my power not affect you?”

“It affected me, but not as quickly as it did Eren.”

“I wonder why that is,” she mumbled.

“I have a theory, Pixis mumbled. He put a force field around me and my powers were isolated. He left a small hole in it and told Christa, “tell him to do something.”

“Your legs feel stronger standing up,” she said and the hole in the force field disappeared and I stood right up without hesitation.

“So because you can read her mind it’s less effective,” Pixis said, a little surprised. “I wonder why that is?” he mumbled.

Maybe because in her thoughts she’s less confident,” I asked.

“You can hear that. That’s so embarrassing,” she whispered.

She left the room after a few more demonstrations. It felt weird to not have control over my own body as it moved.

Mina walked in next. This was going to be a more extreme version of Christa’s powers. Well, that’s what I thought, but I really wasn’t sure what to expect.

She walked in and up to me with her head down. “Are you sure we have to do this?”

“Yes, but don’t worry I can handle it,” I said, giving her a smile.

She nodded and sat down on the floor Pixis sat down with her and let her elan up against him so she didn’t just slump over. She took a deep breath and then was out. The next thing I knew I was sitting in the passenger seat in my own head. I couldn’t see very well what was happening unless I really focused on it.

I was moving around and talking, but it wasn’t me. It felt really weird, but I knew this was just Mina’s power at work. A moment later I was laying on the ground unconscious in Eren’s arms.

“Sorry, I tried not to make you unconscious when I left but it didn’t work.” She whispered.

“How long was I out?”

“Just a few minutes, which is pretty good since usually, the people she possesses are out for hours.”

“I’m taking the next person,” Eren told me he looked worried.

“You might want to take that back,” Pixis said and we both looked up at him. “I was planning on having Shadis go next.

“What, you are out of your damn mind if you think I’m going to use my powers on these boys,” Shadis shook his head. “I’d rather use my power on you.”

“You know your power doesn’t work on me,” Pixis said smugly.

“Which is a real shame cause sometimes I really think about hurting you,” Shadis glared him down.

“Well, I tried,” Eren you’ll take Mike while Levi rests a moment.

“How?” Eren asked, wondering how we would even use Mike's power in a demonstration.

“You go hide somewhere and Mike is going to find you and bring you back.”

“So hide and seek,” Eren asked with a raised eyebrow.

Pixis just smiled and shrugged, “I don’t have a better idea do you?”

“No.” Eren sighed before leaving the room.

“Okay, now that he’s gone we only have a few more people left so I’m going to have Hanji do her demonstration since her power is just healing Eren won’t have to worry about you getting hurt.”

“Okay that’s fine,” I said before forcing myself to my feet. “But I’m not injured. Well aside from my arm, but she can’t do much to help with that.”

“Hm,” Pixis said before crossing his arms, “I didn’t think that through. Honestly, I thought you guys would have gotten injured by now.”

“Injured?” Mike asked walking in the room carrying Eren over his shoulder. “Eren’s injured.”

“How?” I asked.

“He fell down the stairs trying to hide in the training area,” he said, setting him down and pointing to the scrapes on his legs and arms.

“For fucks sake Eren,” I rolled my eyes. “We leave you alone for a minute.”

“A lot can happen in a minute,” he mumbled.

Mike left the room and Hanji walked up and put her hand on Eren and we watched as his wounds healed before our eyes.

Hitch came in after Eren got healed and I took a step back. “Her power doesn’t work on me so Eren this is all you,” I said and he shrugged.

“Bring it on,” he said before turning to her.

She nodded and all of the sudden there were tears in his eyes. I wasn't sure what she was showing him until I took a look in his mind. I knew why he was starting to tear up. She was showing him the field… how did she even know what it looked like?

The illusion ended and she got really quiet before looking at Eren, “I hope I did it justice. I asked Jean what your favorite place was and had him describe it.”

“It was beautiful,” Eren said, still trying not to cry. I walked over and put my hand in his and gave it a squeeze.

She left the room and we had one more person to go. Hanna walked in and I felt Eren squeeze my hand even more. He was worried about her power. He was about to volunteer to take the hit for this one but I did it first.

“Let’s see if you can bring me to my knees again,” I said and she nodded. I could feel Eren staring at me frustrated that I did that.

“Ready?” she asked.

“Go for it,” I said before preparing myself.

It started off weak but I felt as she pushed more and more. I held it off and I could feel my head start to throb. I held out a little more until it felt like my head might explode before finally, I fell to my knees. Eren quickly stepped forwards when that happened.

“Stop that’s enough,” he said quickly before looking at Hanna who was worried that he was mad at her. “Thank you for that. Good job,” he said with a smile making her feel better.

She left the room and Pixis congratulated us for making it through everyone. “We’re heading to bed that whipped us out,” Eren said before wrapping my arm around his shoulder and helping me off the ground.

“We will tell everyone not to bother you,” Pixis nodded as everyone started to leave the room.

“We are going to have a long chat, and then maybe we will have some fun,” Eren said. That’s right he’s probably going to question me about my response to Gunther’s questions.


	84. Take the Lead

We made it into our room and I had Levi sit on the bed. He looked paranoid about the conversation he knew was coming. “So, am I in trouble?” he finally asked.

“A little bit.”

“Great,” he said sarcastically.

I sat down next to him and put my head on his shoulder, “you told me the only reason you are fighting is because of me that you didn’t care what happened to yourself. How am I not supposed to be upset by that? I want you to care more about yourself.”

“I mean I do care about myself, but I know how I am. I’m not the type of person to fight unless I have a reason, and you are my reason.”

“First of all that’s total bullshit, I’ve seen you fight without a reason before,” I rolled my eyes.

“Not that kind of fight, I mean to keep going like this. If I never met you I think sure I would have still joined Pixis and them in their fight, but I don’t think I would have been motivated to keep fighting as hard as I have been. That’s what I mean when I say that. I mean I would probably still be pulling reckless stunts, but I don’t think I would have tried as hard as I am.”

“I think I understand, but I want to hear you explain a little more,” I knew exactly what he was talking about, but I couldn’t help but be curious about what would be different.

“Well, I think on missions I probably wouldn’t have worried about stealth as much. I definitely would be locked in my room a whole lot more, and probably wouldn’t have been as hell-bent on actually trying to fight to make a change and more just fight because I was angry.” He paused before grabbing my hand, “So when I say you are the reason I fight this hard I mean it.”

“Awe now I feel special,” I said, giving him a kiss on the cheek.

“So do I now that I know I single-handedly changed your views on marriage.”

“Yeah, yeah, don’t let it go to your head.”

“Too late,” he smiled. “Now about earlier, didn’t you say you were going to show me just how much you love me?” he asked and I rolled my eyes.

“Guess you haven’t forgotten about that,” I mumbled before sliding off the bed and getting on my knees in front of him. “Close your eyes,” I told him.

“But I want to see this.”

“Close your eyes or I’m not doing it,” I said.

He gave me a slight pout before letting out a frustrated sigh and closing his eyes. Levi looked so relaxed with his eyes closed. I looked down and undid his pants sliding them down. My hands hooked themselves in the waistband of his boxers. I slid them down and saw he was already semi-hard.

“You got hard just from thinking about me doing this?” I asked.

“How could I not. I see you get on your knees and of course, I get a little excited,” Levi said, pulling his shirt off to get it out of the way early.

I just rolled my eyes knowing he couldn’t see me doing it. I looked up at his eyes to make sure they stayed close. I put my hand on his member and I watched as he clenched his eyes tightly. When I leaned my head down and wrapped my lips around him his head leaned back a little and he bit his lip. “Fuck baby,” he mumbled as I started bobbing my head up and down.

As I bobbed my head up and down I moved my hands up to grab onto Levi’s thighs. I squeezed his thighs as I took him all in. I hooked my hand under his leg and pulled it over my shoulder holding his leg tight to stop him from squirting. “Oh fuck,” he said through clenched teeth.

“Ew,” I heard a voice from behind me.

“Get the fuck out Jean,” I said without even turning around.

“Hey, you don’t have to tell me twice. Damn, I just wanted to hang out, but no-.” I got tired of hearing his voice so I made a gravity field in the hallway and quite literally threw him out of the room.

“I swear that bastard never knocks,” Levi grumbled.

“At least this time he didn’t walk in on us actually fucking. I doubt he saw anything this time.”

“Yeah he can’t see my dick if it’s in your mouth,” Levi said smugly.

“I meant because he was behind me,” I rolled my eyes.

“So can I open my eyes yet or?”

“Not yet,” I said before using the leverage I had on his leg to pin him to the bed. “How about we switch things up,” I said trying to get us both back in the mood after Jean rudely interrupted.

“Gladly,” Levi said, opening his eyes to look into mine. He blinked a few times to adjust his eyes to the sudden light change. I kept his leg up around my shoulder and he stared me down with a smile. “Looks like you’re taking lead on this one.”

“Oh definitely.”

"Then I can't wait for you to show me just how much you love me, but you can't do that with these on," Levi said leaning forward and giving my dick a squeeze through my pants.

"You're right, would you like to help me with that little problem," I asked and he gave me a smile. 

I let go of his leg and sat up letting him undress me. He started with my shirt throwing it off to the side where his was. Next, he started to pull my pants and underwear down when I saw him wince a little. His arm is still messed up. I probably shouldn't be making him use it like this.

"I'm fine," he rolled his eyes pushing me down and pulling them off the rest of the way. "I hate that you think I'm so fragile."

"I know you aren't fragile, but you are precious to me so I want you to be as comfortable as possible."

"Well then you already failed," he laughed.

"What do you mean?"

"Well how comfortable can I be when your dick is going to be in my ass."

"Oh," I laughed awkwardly. "You have a point, but I mean you do like it."

"Really do I?"

"Wait you would tell me if you didn't like it right?" I whispered.

Levi just laughed, "baby, I was just messing with you, of course, I like it." He used his power to bring the lube and condoms over to us.

"Good," I mumbled, grabbing the lube.

"I know you said you would take the lead, but do you mind if I do for a moment."

"If you have to," I rolled my eyes sarcastically, but sat back and let him do what he wanted.

"Oh trust me you're going to like what I have planned." He said grabbing the lube and pushing me down. Before straddling my lap.

He put some lube in his hands and arched his back as he slid his fingers into his own ass. He looked me dead in the eyes and gave me a wink as he bit his lip. "Like what you see?" He asked.

"Definitely, I just wish I had a better view of all the action." I said before moving my hand to stroke his cock, "but I think I'll make due here."

His body trembled a little as I teased him a bit. I took a moment to roll on a condom while he was busy entertaining himself. When I was done I put my hands on his hips and watched as he finished up. "Told you that you'd enjoy this," Levi said before pulling his fingers out with a little moan. "But I think we will enjoy this next part much better."

"Damn right, here is where I take the lead back," I said moving his hips to scoot Levi back a little so we could get started. I moved one hand to help push my dick in and Levi's eyes shut, he bit his lip and threw his head back a little

I moved my hands back to his hips as I helped him move up and down his one hand helped stabilize himself while the other he held to his chest to stop it from moving too much.

"How's your arm doing?"

"It's, ah, fine," he said between moans.

"I think it would be better if we switched positions," I suggested and he nodded in agreement.

I sat up and moved one hand to hold his back and the other stayed holding his hip as I moved my legs and rolled us over catching myself with my arm that was behind him. Levi was laying on his back looking up at me with wide eyes. "That was pretty impressive," he mumbled to himself.

I used my free arm to hook his leg over my forearm before thrusting deep into him.

"Fu-ah!" He moaned before slapping a hand over his mouth. "That was way too loud," he said almost embarrassed.

"Well, Jean and Marco are the ones who would hear and I'm sure after Jean walked in on us he told Marco to leave the room too."

"And Armin who is just across the way from Jean and Marco?" He asked.

"Well, I'm sure we will know later if we see a mortified look on his face."

"Oh you will just see the look, I'll get the panicked thoughts," Levi laughed. His laughter didn't last long as I picked up my pace and he bit down on his lip to stop himself from moaning out again.

"You don't have to hold it all back," I said thrusting in once again.

"I do or I might get too loud," he tried to keep his voice at a whisper before biting his lip once again.

"Damn I wish I could make you cry out, all the more reason to put an end to this sooner. So we could get a place of our own where we could do whatever we wanted whenever we wanted and however loud we want to be.

"One day, but until then I'm fine as long as I have you," Levi whispered before nipping at my neck.

I took the opportunity to pick up my pace even more but not before whispering, "if you need to stay quiet just bite me."

He took my suggestion and did just that biting down on my shoulder as I thrusted into him.

"Fuck babe," I whispered as I got close. I could tell he was getting close too with how much he was starting to squirm and moan.

"Almost there baby," he said, grinding up against me to try and match my thrusts.

After a few more thrusts he was at his limit. I could tell he was trying to hold out for longer but when I thrusted in hitting the right spot he crumbled. "Cumming," he breathed out.

"I'm close babe," I said giving him a warning I couldn't hold out much longer and ended up cumming.

We both collapsed down on the bed and just rode out the blissful orgasm. "You really showed me how much you love me," Levi said with a big smile. "I think I just showed you the opposite," he said, pointing to the bite marks that littered my neck.

"Hey, they're called love bites for a reason," I laughed.

"You got me there," he said before cuddling up next to me.

"I'm exhausted," I whispered closing my eyes.

"I can definitely go for a nap," he said but sat up, "however, I think we should at least put our clothes on in case Jean decides to be nosy again."

"Good idea."

We got dressed and cleaned up before hopping into bed for a nap. We both knew this would be less of a nap and rather us just going to bed really early.


	85. Not a Drill

Today was quite an odd day. Normally we just spend the days watching sparring matches, getting briefed for missions, or hang out in our rooms all day. “So how did you think today went?” I asked Hitch as we wandered around the building aimlessly. Normally we would just hang out in the common area or the rooms, but I wanted to walk around and stretch my legs.

“I think it went okay, no one got seriously injured so that’s always a good thing,” she shrugged. “What about you Marlowe, how did you think things went?”

“I think they went fine, but I’ve also never seen Levi break down like that. I didn’t think he was the type to break down,” I remember earlier when they ushered us out of the room.

“Well, not everyone can be strong all the time. Besides you’re telling me you wouldn’t be conflicted if someone told you to hurt me?” She asked, folding her arms.

“I mean of course I would, but-.” I froze as we walked past the wall closest to the street.

“But what?” She asked.

“Shhh,” I put my finger up to my lips before turning back to look at the wall. Somethings wrong. Something’s very wrong. “We need to go now!” I said grabbing her hand and pulling her until we were both running. I ran straight to where Pixis was usually at rather than hunting down Nanaba. The whole time Hitch was asking me what was wrong and why we were running. I didn't have time to stop and explain it to her. I need to alert them as fast as I can.

We made it to Pixis’s office and saw Pixis, Shadis, and Nanaba discussing something. We didn’t have time for formal greetings. “Somethings wrong!” I yelled getting all of their attention. “We need to hide everything.”

“Why what’s happening?” Nanaba asked.

“I saw people’s heat signatures outside lining up like they were getting ready to raid.

“Shit,” Pixis said standing up. “I’ll find Erwin, in the meantime warn as many people as you can to get started,” he said running out of the room.

It took only around 15 seconds for portals to appear in every room and Pixis’s voice rang out. “People have found the base, this is not a drill. I repeat this is not a drill.”

I woke up hearing Pixis’s voice right next to me. “People have found the base, this is not a drill. I repeat this is not a drill.” I quickly jumped up looking to make sure Eren was up and hear the message. He gave me a nod and we got straight to work. I found Petra and we started knocking down the walls and moving the particles to where the wall would go. I felt like I was moving a lot slower and I realized I was. I never thought about how only being able to use one arm would impact drills and in this case real emergencies.

My adrenaline started pumping when I realized this was taking longer than normal even though our normal times was cutting it close. If we get caught because of me I would never be able to forgive myself. Right as we finished everything everyone was already in place with all the stuff moved. We quickly put the wall up just as we heard footsteps coming in. I silently prayed we solidified the wall in time, but I couldn’t tell.

I couldn’t hear the people’s thoughts through the wall, the only thing I could do was close my eyes and focus on Marlowe’s thoughts as he looked at the heat signatures moving behind the wall.

Thomas silently connected Pixis, Shadis, Nanaba, and Marlowe so he could keep them filed in on their positions too. The silence was deafening as we tried to hear what they were saying through the wall. It was mostly inaudible mumbling, but every once in a while a sentence or a word would slip through when they raised their voice.

One person was talking and I was able to piece together what he was saying by just a few words I managed to hear. “Reports, cursed, here, waste, time.”

So someone reported us being here but they think it was a whole waste of time. If that’s the case then they should leave fairly quickly right?

“Abandoned for decades,” I heard a piece of another sentence.

“Perfect hiding place for cursed... may return.” My heart sank at those words. That would mean they are planning on staying for a lot longer.

“No chance, too close to town,” another voice spoke up.

“Waste of time,” I heard again.

It was hard to know if they were planning on staying or not. Most of them seemed convinced this was a waste of time, but others aren’t so sure.

“It was probably just homeless people passing through,” someone yelled getting more frustrated, “this report was an old one and all it said was a group of people walked in here over a month ago.”

What group are they talking about? We never use the doors, we are careful we always teleport in and out whenever we need to leave. Over a month ago when a group of us came in. What could they be referring to?

This is all our fault. I heard Nanaba’s thoughts and it all clicked. That’s right they did come in through the entrance, and it was during the daytime. I’m just surprised it took them a month to investigate, but then again it doesn’t sound like they believed the claim in the first place.

Pixis was trying to convince her that it wasn’t their fault while I was still trying to figure out what the people were saying. After a while, most of us just sat down and got comfortable realizing that they might be here a while. I’m just hoping we don’t have to move because of this. It would be a pin finding another building and moving all of the supplies. Not to mention rebuilding everything.

After over an hour had passed I started hearing Thomas’s thoughts panic more and more. He was worried he would go past his limit with having those four connected. Apparently, he could only hold the connection for an hour and thirty minutes, and that timer was quickly ticking down. I’m sure the people will be here longer than 15 minutes, which was how much longer he could hold their connection. He kept thinking about how he has to push himself to hold the connection for longer.

I decided to stop his stress and got up quietly walking over to him and whispering, “I can keep them filled in whenever you need to end your power, don't push yourself. Backlash is the last thing we need to deal with right now.”

“Really?” He whispered.

“Yeah just give me a look and I’ll handle it,” I said patting him on the shoulder before going to sit where Pixis, Shadis, and Nanaba were. Eren scooted over and sat with me. When Thomas gave me the nod I updated them quietly on what Marlowe was seeing. Marlowe was sitting dead center so he could see better whereas we were sitting off to the side. All of us moving would make too much noise so it was easier for me to just whisper and fill them in.

They took their sweet time walking around checking every little detail. “There’s so much dust here that I’m sure no one’s been living here. Besides if there were people here recently we would have seen their footprints in the dust and dirt on the ground, but all I’m seeing is our own. This whole thing has been a huge waste of our time. I told you it was probably a false report,” Some guy was really angrily yelling. He seemed to be annoyed with how long they were staying too.

“Well if we would have checked it out sooner we may have found something, but it took us over a month to investigate so of course there’s no one here now,” another person yelled back.

“It was probably nothing, to begin with. Do you know how many homeless people are wandering around nowadays, it was probably just some squatters trying to get out of the sun for a little while.”

“Do you know how many of those homeless are cursed? Most of them are dangerous blue badges! How are you going to tell me without the slightest bit of doubt that none of them were probably dangerous cursed? For all, we know one of them could have been an exile?”

“An exile? Now I know you’re delusional, no exile would be spotted this close to town!”

“Would both of you shut the hell up! You’re making my ears bleed with all your bitching. Even if there was something here a month ago there’s nothing now, and hasn’t been for a while. This whole thing was a waste of my time.” A new voice yelled breaking up the argument. He didn’t seem too thrilled to be here either. This man sounded a lot older than the other two maybe he was a higher rank? He has to be because once he spoke up the two that were arguing went dead silent.

It didn’t take long after that for them to clear out of here. Even after they left Pixis had a hold for another hour just to make sure they weren’t coming back. After the hour had passed he had Armin go out and check to make sure everyone was really gone. When Armin came back and gave Pixis the all-clear he finally let us out.

I looked around at the floor to see what dirt and dust it was they were talking about since we tried to keep this place fairly clean. It was the particles sitting on the floor from where Petra’s power had taken down the walls. That’s right her power did make that stuff look like dust. Her power saved our asses in more ways than we even realized.

Before we were able to put anything back Pixis had us all come closer and gather around him so he could address us all. “We were lucky today, we only saw them coming because of Marlowe. We have gotten too comfortable here and weren’t expecting a threat to come right in. we need to start being more prepared.”

“What do you suggest we do?” Reiner asked from behind me.

“We need to start having lookouts. At least two at all times. We will switch off in shifts. Shadis and I will take the first shift tonight.” he said volunteering themselves. Shadis seemed to be in agreement as he nodded along to the idea. “We can figure out other groups later and when the pairs need to switch off, but right now we need to address a few more things,” he said taking a deep breath.

“Did you hear them? I don’t think they’re coming back,” Connie said a little confused.

“It doesn’t matter. We can’t change it. The only reason we survived today was because of pure luck that Marlowe saw them when he did. Next time we might not be so lucky. From now on every time we come or go whether it be for supply runs or for missions we will have to move everything and patch everything up because if we don’t and people come while we are away we will get caught because in an emergency we wouldn’t have enough people to hide everything.”

Eren’s thoughts were going so fast. He was scared, as was I. Pixis was right. We only survived today because of dumb luck. Both Eren and I were asleep if we were raided without warning we would have definitely been captured… or worse. It makes me uneasy knowing that those people know where we live. Even if they don’t know we live here. This place was home. It was always a safe spot for us; we've never had people raid us before. I mean I always knew it could happen, but now that it has it makes me feel like nowhere is safe. The only thing that was standing between us and several men with guns was a thin wall that was barely put up on time.

Pixis dismissed us and before we got to work putting everything back I heard Mom and Molbit offer to take the first shift while everyone was putting stuff back. They told Pixis and Shadis that they could relieve them later tonight. It made me even more uneasy knowing that if there was another raid tonight that mom and Molbit were the first two in danger. What if the next raid doesn’t set up before storming in then what?

“Hey, it’s okay baby,” Eren said putting his hand on my shoulder, “I know we are both really freaked out about what just happened, but it’s okay. Everything’s okay now. Here let’s sit down for a moment,” he said and I couldn’t tell why his thoughts were so worried until I realized that my whole body was trembling. I think it was all the anxiety and adrenaline trying to leave my body, it’s so much worse cause it’s not just my anxiety and adrenaline I’m feeling.

The second Eren got me to sit on the floor it was over so much exhaustion hit me that I could barely keep my eyes open. There were so many emotions flowing through me and then all of a sudden nothing. I was so overwhelmed with emotions that I no longer felt anything but my consciousness fading as my eyes shut. Before they did I could barely make out Eren as well as Levi and Pixis standing over me. They were trying to talk to me, but I couldn’t make out anything as my whole world went black.


	86. Quite the Scare

I opened my eyes. Despite feeling my whole body scream at me I sat up. Looking around I realized I was in bed in our room. “Was that all a dream?” I whispered faintly remembering the chaos.

“Sadly no,” Eren said and I turned my attention to him. He was sitting next to me on the bed. He looked so relieved to see me wake up. I didn’t even know he was there. Wait. Why didn’t I hear his thoughts or feel his emotions? What’s happening? I started to panic for a moment when his thoughts faintly came through. They were like whispers in the back of my head. I could barely tell what he was thinking. It started to get clearer, but it still stayed quieter than normal. “Hey don’t stress yourself out,” he said quickly.

“Why can’t I feel your emotions?” I asked, completely ignoring his request.

“It’s not permanent,” he said quickly taking my hand in his, “Hanji said you overworked yourself both on the mind-reading and on your empathic abilities so you might be numb to feelings for a little bit until your body fully rests up,” he said with a comforting smile.

“I didn’t even realize I was overdoing it.”

“Adrenaline will do that.”

“Wait so how are the rooms fixed? Didn’t I pass out before that?” I asked looking around.

“Franz helped Petra using your powers.”

“Oh.” I said quietly, “how long was I out?”

“About an hour.”

“That long?”

“Long?” Eren asked with raised eyebrows. “You do realize Hanji said that you would probably be out for the rest of the night.” We all thought it would be a lot longer. I faintly heard his worried thoughts.

“I didn’t think I overdid it that much?” I asked. Then again I’ve never had backlash this bad from my mind-reading or empath abilities since we were in school.

“Are you kidding? You overdid it to the point where we are discovering new backlash. Your powers are barely working right now and you think that’s normal?” not to mention- his thoughts cut out and I couldn’t tell if I just couldn’t hear them or if he just stopped mid-thought.

“No I guess not, I just, I didn’t realize that I really overdid it. I didn’t feel it until-.”

“Everything calmed down and your adrenaline disappeared.”

“Yeah,” I said, realizing that of course, I wouldn't feel anything with that much adrenaline going through me, and everyone else around me.

“Also Thomas told me to tell you that you’re a hypocrite,” Eren said confused. “Do you know why he said that?”

For a second I was as confused as he was about that comment until I remembered the last thing I said to him. “I told him not to push his powers past its limits cause we didn’t need to deal with backlash.” I took a deep breath. “I did exactly what I told him not to.”

“Oh, so you are a hypocrite,” Eren nodded.

“Well, I didn’t realize I was pushing myself.”

“And if you did?”

“And if I did?” I asked back trying to see where he was going with this.

“Would it have changed how you would have handled that situation?”

I just sat there staring at him. I wanted so desperately to tell him that yes I would have done things differently, but we both know that’s a flat-out lie.

After staring at each other in the dead silent room he just shook his head, “exactly.”

“Did I miss dinner?” I asked about changing the subject.

“Kinda, but they saved you some.”

I nodded and we headed towards the common area where they left a plate for me sitting on one of the tables. It was neatly covered to keep it fresh.

“You’re back in the land of the living,” I heard a voice behind me. “You had everyone so worried.”

“Sorry mom,” I said as she came and took a seat next to me. “You’re coming from the front?” I asked.

“Pixis and Shadis just relieved me and Molbit from lookout duty,” she said, laying her head on the table and letting out a yawn. She kept her eyes on me the whole time.

“If you’re tired then you should go to bed,” I said rolling my eyes. I couldn’t hear fully what she was thinking since I was focusing my powers on Eren’s thoughts just to stop them from bouncing around and overdoing it again.

“I don’t want to go to bed. I want to spend some time with my boys,” she said, giving me a tired smile. I could tell she was still worried about something. Maybe it’s not a worry, but she's definitely watching me. She keeps looking at me as if she were afraid if she took her eyes off me I’d vanish. I could see the bags under her eyes. If my powers were working properly I would feel how exhausted she is, weird she didn’t seem this exhausted earlier?

Molbit walked in a moment later and walked over giving me a pat on the shoulder, “glad to see you up and moving,” he said with a relieved smile before heading to his room.

Man everyone is really worrying over nothing. I mean yeah I blacked out this ain't the first time and it probably won’t be the last. I don’t get why they are all making this big of a deal about it.

I just quietly ate my food as mom and Eren talked. I didn’t even fully hear their conversation. My head was throbbing too much to focus on much of anything. I know one thing is for sure when I finish eating I’m going straight back to bed. It didn’t help that my back and hips were also hurting sitting like this.

I let my mind wander as I started thinking about earlier. Were two lookouts really enough? I mean there are technically four entrances, but two of them were caved in before we even got here. We made the building more stable, but still, I wonder if people can still get in through those entrances? No, I'm sure Pixis has already checked them out.

“Hello?” I heard mom say as she waved a hand in front of my face.

“Huh?” I asked. Were they talking to me?

“I asked if you’re an astronaut?” she said and I gave her a really confused look.

“An astronaut?”

“Yeah, I mean you’re staring off into space,” she smiled. I just rolled my eyes at her stupid joke. “No but seriously are you okay? I know Pixis said you weren’t having an easy time earlier when you didn’t have your powers and I know right now they aren’t exactly working as they should so…” her voice trailed off.

“I mean it definitely feels uncomfortable, but I can manage,” I nodded. I mean I would be lying if I said I was perfectly fine with this, but being able to feel my powers a little bit is still more comforting than when they were gone earlier.

I finished my last few bites and decided to call it. I waited a few more minutes so I didn’t interrupt their conversation. “I think I should get back to bed,” I stood up and Eren nodded standing too.

“I think we all need some rest,” he said. We gave mom a hug goodnight and headed back to our room.

We laid down and I must have fallen right to sleep because the next thing I know after my head hit the pillow I was waking up in the morning.

When I looked around Eren was already gone. I got dressed and headed off to find him. I bumped into Jean while I was looking and let out a sigh of relief. Oh, he’s awake. His thoughts said. I could feel his emotions as relief came over him, then anger. “Idiot you had us all scared,” he said glaring at me.

“Everyone keeps saying that, it’s not like I haven’t blacked out before,” I rolled my eyes. Everyone is making a big deal out of nothing.

“Passed out yes, but not like that,” he sighed looking down at the ground.

“Like what?”

His eyes shot back up to mine, “they didn’t tell you?”

“Tell me what?” I already know I blacked out what could have been so troublesome that it’s got everyone losing their shit.

“You were bleeding, like a lot.” Jean said quieter this time, “it scared us half to death we thought you died.”

“I was bleeding? Did I hit my head?” I asked bringing my hand up to the back of my head to feel for any pain before realizing if I did hit my head Hanji probably would have healed it.

“No Eren caught you,” Jean mumbled before I saw the scene flash in his head as he remembered it. Looking in his mind, the memory of it was horrifying. I was unresponsive and motionless as blood dripped from my nose and leaked out of my ears. There was even some blood coming from my eyes.

“What,” I said quietly. “There’s no way that happened. What exactly was that?”

Jean looked up at me realizing I saw his thoughts. “As I said, we thought you died. We weren’t quite sure what had happened. We thought your brain melted or something. Honestly, we still aren’t quite sure what happened. Hanji thinks it was just from extreme backlash since she couldn’t find any permanent trauma from it, but it was horrifying.”

No wonder everyone is acting all weird. Eren was clinging to me practically all night until we fell asleep. Mom wouldn’t take her eyes off of me while we were talking last night. I took a deep breath as everything started to make sense.

“Do you know where Eren is?” I asked, pushing these thoughts out of my mind. I don’t wanna deal with all of this right now.

“He went to talk to Pixis about the missions and training as well as the lookout schedule.”

“Speaking of who’s on lookout duty right now?”

“Petra and Auruo. Nanaba and Hannes are planning on relieving them in a few hours.”

I just nodded and started to walk away. “Hey, are you sure you’re okay? Maybe you should rest a little longer?” he said grabbing my arm.

“I’ll be fine, don’t worry I’ll take it easy today, but if I stay in bed all day I’m going to lose my mind.”

He just nodded and let go of my arm, “Just don’t scare us like that again dumbass,” he mumbled.

I walked into Pixis’s office where Eren, Pixis, and Shadis were all discussing training and how much everyone will need. “After about a week of training then we can try and figure out when the mission is, but let’s see how fast everyone learns before giving them a deadline,” I heard Pixis say before he looked up.

“Levi, glad to hear you’re doing okay now, you gave us all quite the scare.”

“So I keep hearing,” I mumbled remembering Jean’s memories.

“You sure it’s okay for you to be up and walking around?” Shadis asked.

“Don’t worry, I’m taking it easy today, but I can’t stay in bed any longer.”

“Alright, well you’re welcome to join us,” Pixis said, gesturing for me to sit in the chair next to Eren.

I took a seat and instantly Eren’s hand found mine. It was a little weird it felt like everyone else seemed to care more about what happened yesterday than Eren. I mean he didn’t even tell me how serious it looked.

After we finished talking with them Eren and I went to the common area and hung around for a bit. We even watched a few sparring matches. There was an awkward silence hanging between us and I couldn’t tell what it was. Eren wasn’t thinking about much of anything which means he’s purposely repressing his thoughts from me so I can’t read them.

The day felt like it dragged on forever, but when we finally decided to head back to bed I decided I wasn’t going to deal with this awkward silence any longer. We finished getting dressed. I sat down on the bed and let out a loud sigh. “Are we going to talk about this or keep pretending everything’s fine when it’s not?”

“I don’t know what you-.

“Bullshit,” I glared at him.

He just took a deep breath and came to sit next to me. He was quiet for a moment as he tried to figure out what he was going to say. “Of all the things that have happened so far that scared me the most. I thought I lost you. I couldn’t even tell if you were still breathing I just saw all that blood and I guess I shut down.” He paused for a moment before taking a deep breath and looking up at me, “I was trying to just push the thoughts away, but I think instead I was pushing you away too. Sorry I was just really scared.”

“You know you could have just told me that. I spent all day thinking you were mad at me or something.”

“I’m not mad. I mean I was for a little before I realized that you didn’t do it on purpose,” he mumbled before looking up at me. “It also occurred to me that no matter what that probably would have happened.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, you can’t control your powers when around strong thoughts and emotions, so being trapped in a small room filled with both overuse and backlash was bound to happen. The only way it wouldn’t have is if you left the room or had loud sounds blocking them out, which we couldn’t have done either of those.”

“So what you're saying is that if we have to do that again then I’m going to end up in the same predicament,” I asked as the thought of how I looked popped back into my head. That was less than Ideal.

“What I’m saying is I think that if we have to do that again then we have to separate you from everyone else. Putting a wall between us and you. I already talked to Pixis about it.”

“No way.”

“But Levi if we don’t you will-.”

I took a deep breath. I guess I was overreacting. “Okay, you’re right.” I mumbled, “but only if you are there with me. I would hate to be trapped there alone,” I said grabbing his hand.

He went to protest but took a deep breath. “But what if my thoughts hurt you?”

“That’s cute you think I’m that weak that one person's thoughts and feelings would be enough to bring me to my knees.”

“I’m serious.”

“So am I. I’m telling you that I will be fine.”

“Fine. It’s hard to say no to being trapped in a room with your boyfriend rather than the room with 30 other people.”

I just laughed and pulled him into bed. “Now let’s get some sleep because I’m beat.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice. I didn’t sleep much last night so I’m exhausted.” We laid down and it didn’t take us long before we fell asleep.


	87. Dying

The training was harder than anyone thought it would be and none of us thought it would be easy to start. These last two weeks were hell. I can barely move a muscle, and I didn’t even have to train as hard as the others since I already knew hand to hand combat as well as how to use my power. Pixis wasn’t messing around when it came to this training. I swear all anyone did this week was train, eat, then go straight to bed. Most of us had to be dragged out of our beds every morning by Mikasa who was the only one who remained unaffected. Curse her and her stamina.

“Eren, come on get up,” Mikasa said tugging at my foot.

“You too Levi.”

“Go away, we aren’t even training today. Pixis said today we all get to rest,” I groaned holding the pillow over my head with shaky arms that throbbed even when I didn’t move them.

“He did say that, but he also sent me to grab you two so he could talk with you guys about the mission.”

“Then tell him to bring his stupid ass in here,” I said before instantly regretting it. I sat up trying to tell her to stop, but she was already out of the room. “I’m so dead,” I mumbled to myself.

“I’ll be at your funeral if I can get my legs to move,” Levi mumbled, still lying face down in the bed.

Pixis came in a minute later with a puzzled look on his face. “Bring my stupid ass in here?” he asked and my cheeks went red with embarrassment.

“Sorry, I was half asleep and didn’t know what I was saying,” I mumbled, not looking him in the eyes.

“Liar, you were wide awake,” Levi said, throwing me under the bus.

I just poked his good arm and watched his whole body tense up from the pain of his sore muscles getting jabbed at. “I’ll fucking kill you,” he said laying perfectly still. We both knew if he moved he would be in even more pain, and that was the last thing he wanted.

Pixis just laughed and crossed his arms, “I guess I have been drilling everyone a little too hard.”

“Ya think,” Levi groaned, forcing himself to sit up. He winced as he got halfway up before collapsing back down. I doubt he will try that again.

“Well, I don’t think you guys will have to worry about that anymore,” he said and my ears perked up. I like the sound of that. “I think everyone’s ready. We can start planning for the mission and actually set a day.”

“Well everyone needs time to let their muscles repair themselves,” Levi mumbled, turning his head so his face wasn’t smooshed into the mattress.

“How does a week from now sound?” Pixis asked and we both nodded.

“Sounds good to us,” I said looking at Levi.

“Perfect, I’ll let you get some rest for now, but tomorrow let’s finalize the teams and figure out what plan will work the best,” Pixis said patting me on the shoulder before turning to leave. I felt my soul leave my body as all of my muscles screamed at me.

“He did that on purpose,” I hissed out.

“Hard to say if he did, but you deserved it,” Levi laughed, still mad about me poking him earlier.

After a full day of rest, my muscles were still throbbing, but it was a little more bearable. I got up and headed to Pixis’s office. I told Levi he could wait in bed if he wanted but he insisted on coming with me. He seemed to be in worse shape than I was, but then again during training, he was worked hard and could only use half of his powers since his arm still isn’t healed yet. Neither of us even bothered to change into actual clothes we just headed to his office in sweats and baggy shirts that we had slept in. We did slip on our shoes first, but a part of me regrets even doing that.

We walked in and Pixis had us take a seat. He handed me the notes we had on the plans and the teams. I looked over the groups we had planned out before training and nodded, “I don’t think we need to change anyone. These teams seem like they will work just fine,” I said handing the list back to him. He looked over it before nodding. “As for the plan, do you think we will need to do any run-throughs?”

“Definitely,” Levi cut in. “Just because everyone did good in training doesn’t mean they will get the plan first try.”

“How do you guys suppose we go on about training?”

“Well,” I started, “I think we should do it one team at a time. The other team that’s not going through the training will be the guards that the others have to defeat. “No holding back from the team in training they can use powers and hand to hand combat, however, the team playing the guards will have paintball guns and can only use those and hand to hand combat,” I suggested

“I like it,” Pixis said with a nod. “Should we move the mission back a few days?”

“I think we should see how everyone does in the mission practice before we decide if we have to move the mission back,” Levi said.

“You’re right. We will start mission training tomorrow.”

“Actually,” I let out an awkward laugh, “is there any chance that we start in two days? I don’t know about everyone else but Levi and I still feel like we’re dying, and I’m sure the others are feeling a lot worse.”

“I haven’t seen anyone else come out of their rooms at all these last two days, not even to get food,” Levi added on.

“I suppose you’re right,” Pixis smiled, “alright, I’ll give everyone another day.”

“Thank you,” both Levi and I blurted out.

“So how did you settle on a week from now as the best time to raid the camp?” I asked. Yesterday he seemed to already have planned that answer before we asked him.

“Molbit has been listening to the guards around town. He heard them say that more of the guards would be returning to town which means they are pulling some out of the camps. I figured it would be best to hit them the day after they pulled them out since they might not have the new schedules down yet.”

“Ah, so they would be off their game and short-staffed.”

“Exactly.”

We came up with a few backup plans before heading back to our room and laying on the bed. We kicked off our shoes and planned on spending the rest of the day laying around in bed. We didn’t have the energy to do anything else.

We heard a knock at our door and I nearly said go away rather than come in. Before I could even tell the person to come in, Levi beat me to it. “Go away,” he yelled before looking at me. “It’s Jean.”

“He knocked?” I asked a little surprised.

Before anyone could answer Jean walked in anyway. “Rude, I actually waited for you to answer before barging in this time and that’s how you treat me?”

“Eren, I’m too sore to hit him, can you do it?” Levi asked and I just shook my head.

“I wish, but as much as I want to, my muscles say no.”

Jean just laid down on the bed next to us, “I wasted all my energy coming in here to hang out with you guys and this is the thanks I get,” he said pretending to be offended.

“You’re only in here because Marco is on lookout duty with Armin and you’re bored.” Levi rolled his eyes.

“So, I would rather be with you two idiots than bored and lonely doesn’t that say how much I love you,” he said sarcastically.

“No, you just wanted to annoy us,” Levi said again and Jean shrugged.

“It’s out of love.”

“Sure it is,” I sighed.

The room got really quiet and Jean let out a groan. “It’s as boring in your room as it is in mine.”

“Then go back to your room,” Levi groaned.

“No. I’d rather be bored with you guys than be bored alone,” Jean said, closing his eyes. I just shook my head and thanked whatever god that he was quiet now.


	88. Don't Get Shot

Our two days of relief had passed and we all dragged our feet to the training area. I could tell some people were still really sore. I mean Eren and I were a little sore, but we could move perfectly fine and it wouldn't really affect us.

Once we were all down in the training area we grouped up. Pixis informed our group that we would be playing the role of the guards first. He had us pass out the paintball guns to the rest of our group while the other team discussed their game plan. I took a few steps back and focused strictly on Eren's thoughts to avoid reading their game plan.

Not only do I have to ignore them while setting up but during the training mission I need to ignore them. I can't even rely on just focusing on Eren's thoughts because that will still allow me to know things that I shouldn't know and it will make it harder for them during training.

"Well I guess we should plan out how we will go about being the guards," Eren said to us. We all talked for a bit about how we were going to go about this to make it seem as accurate as possible.

When they finished planning Mikasa gave the order for everyone to line up. “Don’t hold back,” We heard Pixis say before they finished getting into positions. On our end, Eren gave the order for us to get to our spots in the makeshift training area that was designed to resemble the layout of the camp for the mountain mission.

Eren and I stayed more towards the back of the camp where most guards would be, watching the prisoners. We wanted to see how well they would do especially with us not holding back. I wonder how quickly they are able to disarm us, or how they plan on going about this?

We all went about “patrolling” the area since they weren’t going to tell us when they actually started. The main difference here is they know who to take down in hand to hand combat and who to take down using powers. We don’t have that luxury in a real mission. Eren and I will probably be taken down by someone's powers rather than through combat. Whereas Mina, Christa, or Armin might be taken down in hand to hand combat.

I looked up at the doorway of the room a few of us were supposed to be guarding. I could hear some movement and I alerted the other guards in the room quietly getting their attention. I made sure to take a mental note of it so that when we were done I could tell them what alerted us and why we were all staring at the door ready to fire.

They came barging through Mikasa just running straight on in and behind her was Annie who was providing the rest of the team cover with her power. Sasha Connie and Hitch were behind Annies shielding. I guess it didn’t matter that they made a noise because their team came in prepared and on the defensive.

Behind them came the next to teams being protected by one of Shadis’s force fields. Before they could start disarming us I saw an opportunity to shoot someone who was barely visible from behind Annie's shield. I took aim and fired, hitting someone’s shin. I knew it was Connie the second I heard the yelp.

“Bad move you have to watch everything, Connie. If this were real Levi would have just blown your foot off,” Pixis said giving him the warning.

“Levi was the one who shot me, damn I can’t even get payback for it then,” he groaned.

“Focus Connie this may be practice, but this is still supposed to be serious,” Annie said and I heard a thump and another yelp from him. It was hard to hold back my laughter knowing she just whacked him upside the head.

Mikasa was nearly covered in paintballs and I couldn’t figure out the plan with that until behind me Berthold yelled out, “I’m out of ammo.”

“Stop firing at her,” I ordered. She smiled at me realizing that I figured out she was the diversion. Not only was Berthold out, but Reiner was out too. “Sasha, Hitch go!”

Everything in the room disappeared and all I could see was a forest. I knew everyone else was in the same illusion. Hearing the thoughts around me from the people I was next to, some of them just started firing blindly hoping to hit Sasha knowing she would be out, but I figured there would be no point. Annie or Mikasa would have her covered as she disarmed each and every one of us. It wasn’t a bad strategy.

I felt the paintball gun get ripped from my hands and just let it happen. I knew they had to work fast since Hitch's illusion on this scale affecting this many people she could only last for about 3-5 minutes. Then again the guards at the actual camp won’t have that insider knowledge so they probably won’t be as calm as I am. They might also not realize it’s an illusion, they might think they are actually teleported somewhere, or if she does the illusion differently like before they even enter the room she can just make the illusion that her and her teammates aren’t there.

The illusion started to disappear and I was back in the training area. Sasha’s doubles were taking the last two paintball guns from our teammates.

“The illusion broke,” Hitch called out and Sasha's doubles retreated with the “guns'' behind Pixis’s team. Mikasa followed her and they both came out a moment later. I didn’t know what she was doing until I accidentally caught her thoughts. In the actual mission, she would break their guns in case someone managed to get their hands back on them. That’s smart, but if that’s what she was pretending to do then she didn’t wait long enough, then again with Mikasa’s powers maybe she did?

Everyone came out of the force field and charged at us. I watched Armin’s hands go up in surrender and rolled my eyes as his hands came back down. His thoughts said that it was a force of habit.

My team did the same charging forward. Just as I expected they avoided Eren, Reiner, and me. Mikasa actually went up to Reiner and I heard his thoughts as he nearly gave up then and there. Annie was the first one to approach me. She gave me a smile before a playful taunt, “let’s dance.”

“Let’s,” I said back, putting my good arm up as a guard. My other arm wasn’t fully healed, but I could use it if I had to. I knew I just had to be careful with it. The last thing I want is to hurt it even more and reset the healing time.

She threw the first punch and I ducked. I was wondering why she isn't using her powers to back herself up. That’s when it hit me that by extending her crystals that far off her body for that long of a time to shield her teammates she probably couldn’t.

We went back and forth for a little bit none of our punches really landed. We were both too good at fighting and predicting the other's moves. What we couldn’t dodge we blocked. It was more about who had more stamina to hold out longer than it was about actually landing a blow now, that was until I heard someone walk up behind me. I ducked out of instinct and I’m glad I did. A punch went just over my head and I got to see who it was behind me. Shit, Mikasa. Well, I know when I’m outnumbered.

“I’m going to say you two won just now, I said, putting my hands up. Not only was I surrounded but one punch from Mikasa where she didn’t hold back as much as she should and I would be out cold.

“Good choice,” Mikasa laughed. I looked over at Reiner who definitely wasn’t smart enough to do the same. He was lying unconscious on the floor.

“You didn’t kill him did you?” I asked Mikasa before she walked away.

“No, though when he wakes up with a headache he might wish that I did.” Oh yeah, his head is going to be pounding. I looked to my right and saw Eren also sitting on the ground with his hands on his head.

“Mikasa?” I asked.

“Yeah. Better to surrender than be knocked out like Reiner.”

“You saw that?”

“Saw it, I heard it,” he laughed, “his body hitting the floor, that’s what I saw but the initial punch that was the noise that made me turn around. Though it was a little too late because Mikasa was already behind me so I just said nope and sat down.”

“I don’t blame you,” I laughed. I mean I did the same thing when I saw her behind me. I looked around the room and saw that most of our team was already captured unconscious or surrendered. That’s pretty good since the only two people ‘shot’ were Connie and Mikasa. Connie’s was a dumb mistake and Mikasa’s was intentional and actually worked in their team's favor.

“Alright, mission training over,” Pixis called out when he saw everyone down. Hanji went around and healed everyone who was unconscious causing th3em to wake up pretty quickly with a few shakes. Reiner wasn’t too happy being one of the first people knocked out.

“We will take a thirty-minute break and we will continue on with the other team,” Pixis announced. “Before we take the break I want everyone to discuss what they could do better. I know there were a few mistakes that could use improvement,” he said before walking in with Petra to make the next area for the desert mission.

I asked them about the noise if that was intentional or not. Turns out someone lost their footing trying to get a good look at the layout and that’s the noise I heard. Their original plan was to have Hitch peek her head around the corner and make the illusion that they weren’t there just like I had thought about, but when she slipped backward they knew it wouldn’t be enough to do it with everyone looking at where they were at.

After Petra finished setting up the area the 30-minute break started. We mostly just spent the thirty minutes trying to make a plan as good as theirs. We had a lot of strong people in our group but so did they. Mikasa and Annie are going to have to be taken down by powers alone because there is no way we are going to win in hand to hand combat with them. Pixis and Shadis also would have to be taken down by powers or by Eren and I since they are also pretty good in hand to hand combat.

“We’re ready,” Eren called out after the 30 minutes were up.

“You want 5 more minutes to plan?” Pixis asked knowing we gave them time to plan.

“Nope,” Eren said and Pixis nodded. Even with all the time, we spent planning I’m still worried about how this is going to go. I’m not worried about training, I'm worried about the actual mission. We’re in unknown territory with some of the people in our group not to mention we are split in half. I mean I know they are pulling out some people from the camps, but will that be enough?

We all got lined up at where the portal would probably open from Erwin. Eren and I stood in the front with Petra behind us. Up next was Jean and Marco covering Petra from the back. Petra was the one in our team that needed the most protection. She wouldn’t be doing any of the fighting, just disarming.

Behind us were Christa Reiner and Berthold with Ymir and Armin following behind them. Armin was watching their back while Christa led the charge. Lastly, we had Erwin and Hanna watching the rest of their group while Franz, Mina, and Hanji stayed behind them. Hanji was watching their backs with the help of Franz who was ready to duplicate Hanna’s power at a moment’s notice.

We walked down the hallways which were empty as we expected. We were told only to focus on guarding the main room so we assumed they would do the same. I wonder if they will have Sasha’s duplicates also patrolling. I doubt it because it would count as using powers, but then again it would also help us to prepare in case there are a lot of guards on the actual mission.

We made it to the main room and we had talked about how we were going to go about this, but even so, I could feel everyone holding their breath.

“Now,” Eren whispered and our team came running out. Eren and I stayed in the front deflecting all the paintballs with our powers as Marco slipped between us creating a thick ice wall. He kept a tiny hole in the middle that we defended while Petra used it to start disarming people. Armin made his way in and started to help Petra and me disarm while Eren defended Petra from the paintballs. We were almost done disarming when I heard a yelp from behind us. Berthold got shot in the chest as he was peeking around to see if it was safe for his team to come out yet.

“Berthold you would be dead if you did that in the actual mission,” Eren said before Pixis could.

“I know, sorry,” he mumbled before backing up. I rolled my eyes. What was he thinking he knew the plan and that definitely wasn’t part of it. Erwin decided that it was about time to move to the next phase of the plan after that and both teams came out behind Erwin who had placed two bigger portals blocking anything that would be shot at them would be shot through one portal and out the other. They were careful and put two more behind them. Once they reached the ice all they left the portals open on the sides blocking the sides keeping us even more covered.

Christa helped disarm the last of the people by looking them in the eyes and telling them to drop the pinball guns. They did just that and Eren used a gravity field to move all of the weapons away from everyone. Marco put another ice wall in front of them to stop anyone from being able to grab them.

We started hand to hand combat, having Petra stay behind the ice wall with jean and Marco keeping her guard as they fought Connie and Sasha who tried to rush them. They pinned them and they surrendered sitting down as they knew they would have been knocked out otherwise. Eren and I went straight for Mikasa and Annie. I used my power to throw them into Eren’s gravity field flipping the gravity on them. Eren pinned them to the ceiling and held them there as I ran over to take care of Pixis who was currently squared up with Erwin.

I backed him up and we brought Pixis to his knees as he surrendered knowing he had been overpowered. I went to look for Pixis but saw Hanji had him all tied up with her vines. That was one way to do it. We looked around and everyone was either tied up, pinned, unconscious, or had surrendered.

“Very good everyone,” Pixis called out, “training is over,” he said Hanji went around healing any injuries and we got everyone up before he looked at both Connie and Berthold. “I don’t think I have to explain what you two did wrong,” he said looking at the paint on their clothes.

“No sir,” they both said.

“I won’t let my curiosity get the best of me again,” Berthold nodded.

“And I will watch where the cover is,” Connie said.

“Good. talk with your team leaders and see if they want to change up anything. We will run through practice again tonight before bed,” he said and everyone nodded before regrouping.

“Sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking,” Berthold said, walking up to Eren.

“Neither do I,” Eren mumbled, “it doesn’t matter because we are going to change up the plan for tonight. I noticed that some things worked and some things didn’t. We need to be prepared for there to be more guards so how we did something might not work for the actual mission.” Eren said looking at everyone, not just Berthold.

We did some brainstorming and spent the rest of the day relaxing until training started up again. We went first and we managed to make it through this run with no one getting shot. The other group went and the same thing no one got shot, well except for Mikasa but she doesn’t really count. We didn’t think we were 100% ready, but it was an improvement.


	89. Desert Raid: Part 1

The next few days were spent just perfecting our mission training run-throughs. We ran into a few problems the more we thought about this setup. We were forgetting that we actually needed a plan to enter the camp. Last time we were fortunate enough to be able to portal straight in, but we don’t have the manpower to walk in and start the fight instantly. After doing a few runs where we tried to work out a way around this issue we decided that we would have to either fight or stealth our own way in.

Pixis’s team had a plan for that with Hitch and Rico on their team they could easily go with either option into the camp, but with our team, we had to have a plan set into place. Pixis asked me if we needed to move back the mission so I could make one. I had to turn down the offer cause no matter what I wouldn’t be able to make a plan until I was actually seeing the situation.

Coming up with a plan on the spot isn’t ideal, but it will have to work. The only other plan I could think of would be tunneling in again, but that would take way too long as well as take Petra and Levi out of commission for the actual fight.

The day of the mission came up and I could tell I wasn’t the only one stressing about it. Even without Levi’s powers, I could feel how stressed everyone was. We packed everything behind the walls and let mom and Molbit hide behind them before getting ready for the mission.

“Eren, how’s your team looking,” Pixis asked, walking up to me.

“They’re worried,” I mumbled.

“We all are,” he sighed, “it’s fine I’m sure everything will be fine.”

“Yes because the last time we went on a camp raid it went swimmingly,” I said sarcastically. “Sorry, I didn’t mean-.”

“I know. We all are just on edge,” he gave me a pat on the shoulder, “try and talk to your team and get them in a better headspace before we have to go. I’ll do the same for my group.”

I took a moment to collect myself before getting my group's attention. Before I could say anything I froze up. What was I supposed to say? That nothing is going to go wrong. That we’ve got everything under control. That no one’s going to die this time. I can’t say any of those things because they are all lies. We don’t know if anythings going to go wrong, we don’t have everything under control, and we sure as hell can’t guarantee that everyone is going to make it back.

I didn’t even notice Levi move next to me until he started talking. “Listen up everyone,” he said, drawing everyone’s attention off of me and to him. “This mission is going to be hard, we are short on people, but is that going to stop us from giving it our all? We’re going to do this quickly and effectively. We have the element of surprise. We know the layout, and we know they are short-staffed. Remember why we’re doing this.”

Everyone stayed quiet for a moment until Christa spoke up, “for the innocent people trapped in those cages,” she nodded.

“To free our fellow exiles,” Berthold added.

“For Ilsa,” Reiner whispered.

“For our own freedom!” Ymir shouted.

“Damn right!” Levi yelled back, “now let’s do this!”

I gave Pixis a nod to let him know we were ready and he finished getting his team ready too. “Why were you able to come up with a pep talk so easily?”

“Because it wasn’t a pep talk. All I did was have them remind themselves why they fight. I didn’t motivate them to fight, they motivated themselves. Each of them fighting for their own reason so reasons may match with everyone else's, some are more personal, but everyone has a reason.”

“Ready,” Pixis called out, giving Erwin the thumbs up. We were having Pixis open a small portal and having Armin check out both to make sure it was safe to enter. Thomas connected Erwin and Pixis so they could communicate when they needed their portal reopened.

“All set,” Armin said and both teams entered their own portals. Both teams were coming out of the portals just a little way outside the camps. It was too risky portaling straight into the camps both teams had to figure out how to enter without getting spotted. Neither of these camps had many cameras set up, we knew where they all were and knew the path to avoid them. All we had to do was get in

We went through the portal staying as low to the ground as possible. I knew I had to think fast. We were standing out in the open and even though we were clear for the moment that would change fairly quickly. Think Eren thinks. I was coming up blank until I saw a guard come into view.

“Orbit,” Christa said, trying to warn me of what I already saw.

“We need a plan like now,” Reiner whispered.

I looked back at them and to the guard who was getting closer and closer. “Christa, how many people can you affect with your power at once?” I asked.

“Maybe around ten, but I won’t be able to hold it for very long,” she whispered confused.

“How long without backlash?”

“Maybe 5 minutes if I border on the edge of overuse.”

“Perfect, that’s all we need.”

“That will never work,” Levi shook his head.

“We would need at least one person per guard for them to even come close to buying it.”

“We have that, well technically,” I said with a shrug, there would be one more of us than guards since I can get 11 guards.

“But there’s 15 of us.”

“Exactly,” I smiled, “just listen I need to explain this as quickly as possible.

“Christa, I need you to get at least the 10 guards under your control. You will be manipulating them into taking us in as prisoners-”

“What?” Reiner asked backing away from me, “Like hell will I be a prisoner-.”

“Shut up and listen,” Levi rolled his eyes. They all quieted down so I could continue.

“We aren’t actually going to be prisoners, but we need them to believe we are. They will walk us right in past any other guards. Mina, you will also be taking control of one of the guards preferably one with a higher rank you will be the one doing all the talking convincing them to bring us in the facility.”

“What I don’t think I can do that,” She said quickly.

“Listen, all you need to do is say we were spotted in the area and surrendered once the guns were pointed at us. You will tell her that we are all red badge level so they won’t be suspicious. Of the eleven guards for twelve prisoners.”

“But I’ll be unconscious. What will you do with my body?”

“You and Erwin will both be unconscious. You can say that you are the two who resisted and were hit with the back of the gun and knocked out. We will have the guards carry your bodies in.”

“I’m assuming I will be astral projecting which is why I’ll be unconscious?” Erwin asked.

“Yes, you will be talking to Ymir since she will be the only one who can see you. You will be telling us where all the guards are and if they buy it or not.”

“So wait, you said there will only be twelve prisoners?” Berthold asked.

“We are going to make some of you disappear.” I looked at Armin Franz and Berthold. Armin and Franz will be invisible, Berthold I want you to stretch yourself as much as you can until you are practically hidden. “He can wrap himself around me and hide under my jacket,” Reiner suggested.

“Whatever works.”

“What about my knives?” Levi asked, looking at his costume. I froze for a moment before pulling off my jacket and throwing it over him.

“Zip it up and pray they don’t notice,” I shrugged as the first guard was starting to get too close we had no other choice at this point.

“The ones on my pants?”

“Again pray they don’t notice. Stay towards the middle of the group,” I said before nodding for Christa to take control of the first guard as he lifted his gun about to fire as he spotted us.

“Don’t you want to take us prisoner,” she said with a sweet tone of voice and he lowered his weapon and nodded.

“Are you sure about this?” Levi whispered.

“Nope, but then again when have I ever been sure about my risky plans?”

“You have a point.”

We walked with the guard escorting us. Until Christa was able to grab the ten guards. It didn’t take very long, but she said she could only hold it for about 5 minutes and that’s if she pushed it. We found a guard that looked higher rank and had Mina take him, Erwin went unconscious and Armin and Franz both went invisible as Berthold hid. Everyone put their hands on their heads as we walked up to the camp.

“Moment of truth,” Levi whispered as we bumped into two other guards.

“Captain what the hell is this?” one of the guards asked the guard Mina was possessing.

“We found some exiles snooping around a little ways back they surrendered when they realized we had them surrounded. We’re going to lock them up,” she said confidently with no hesitation. Good job Mina.

“Alright, should we back you up?” they asked seeing that the guards were outnumbered.

Mina paused for a moment she knew she couldn’t just turn around and ask me. I knew what she had to say. I just hoped she knew too. “Yes, we can’t let these cursed outnumber us now can we,” she said and I let out a sigh of relief. Had she turned them away they might have suspected something.

We all walked through and I felt a problem coming up. Right here we needed to wait in the hallway while Mina Armin and Franz disabled the cameras, but we couldn’t do that with these two watching our every move. We need to think fast what if these guards snap out of Christa’s control?

“Actually,” could you all wait here for a moment,” she said and the guards stopped and looked at her.

“Sir?”

“I need to go to the control room and make sure that we didn’t miss any,”

“What if they try to escape just standing here?” They asked.

Mina stared them down with a glare that could kill, “that’s what you are here for. Just keep your guns on them and make sure they don’t. Do you really think they are going to try and make an escape with this many guns trained on them? They are a bunch of red badges with powers that couldn’t hurt a fly. In a camp surrounded by guards. Are you really scared of them?” She asked with a condescending voice.

“No sir!”

“Good now do your damn jobs, and watch them,” she growled before matching off.

“Is it just you or has he gotten scarier?” one of the guards asked.

“I think he’s just in a bad mood.” The other whispered back.

After Mina had disappeared for two minutes I could see how tired Christa was from holding this and I knew any moment we would be in deep shit. Come on Mina, Armin, Franz. You guys need to hurry.

Almost as if my mental begging reached them Mina appeared around the corner. “As from what I can see we got them all,” she said looking at the two guards. “However, I need more people watching the cameras. The two guards already in there missed these guys who knows what else they are missing. You two go in there and help them,” she said and we knew that was the cue.

The second their backs were turned to us Franz and Armin quickly grabbed them and knocked their heads against the wall. It looked painful, but effective they were out.

“Christa, put them all to sleep,” I said and she nodded.

“On second thought you guys no longer want to take us as prisoners instead you want to slam your heads against the wall to go to sleep,” she said and all at once all of them turned and did just that. I stared on in horror as they all fell to the ground.

“There isn’t a nice way to do that?” I asked and Christa shrugged.

“I never thought about it. Why be nice to them when they want us dead.”

“You have a point,” I nodded before having everyone follow me. We had to walk past the guards' barracks and I nodded to Petra and Levi to take care of it. They turned the door into a wall.

“How will they get out?” She asked.

“They’ll find a way. The wall you both made isn’t that think they could probably break it down, it just might take a few hours for them to get the proper materials,” I shrugged. I paused before moving forward. I didn’t want to make the same mistake as last time. “Seal up that door too,” I said pointing to the door we came in through. The last thing we need is someone sneaking up on us. We sealed the door and kept moving. People were sure to notice that eventually and I wanted to be out of here, or at least already in the middle of the fight before that happened.

When we got to the morgue we sent Armin and Franz in to knock the guards out before we locked them the same way we did to the guards in the barracks. All that was left was a few more hallways and then the main prison room. “We can do this,” I whispered to myself.


	90. Desert Raid: Part 2

We walked down the halls and took out the few guards wandering around. Until we hit the room filled with prisoners. We all took a deep breath before I nodded to team A. “We’re about to go in. When it’s time for teams B and C to come in we will call for you but until then don’t move from here.” I said. They all nodded.

“Alright, Marco’s ice wall won’t be enough to stop all these bullets so Levi I hope you’re ready,” I whispered looking at him.

“As ready as I can be facing down a wall of guns,” he mumbled.

“Jean if you can use your fire to try and keep them grouped up as much as possible.”

“What do you need me to do?” Marco asked. “If you can jam or freeze the guns with any water then do that,” I said and Marco nodded opening the bottles he carried in his pants so he had access to the water.

“I’m just melting the guns right?” Petra asked and we nodded.

“Everyone ready?” I asked.

“Ready,” everyone repeated back to me.

I put my hand on the door and nodded. I used my power to not only rip the door off its hinges but aimed it at some of the guards that were more grouped together; they hit the ground and instantly it was raining bullets on us. I made a strong gravity field to the side of us to pull all the bullets away from us while using another to keep us in place. One by one all the guards' guns melted in their hands dripping between their fingers.

Levi was watching the other side of us keeping the bullets off of us from that side. I watched a few of the guards desperately hit their jammed guns or even throw them on the floor when they started freezing from the inside thanks to Marco.

Jean was using his fire to move them all together but made it look like he was aiming for the guards so they wouldn’t realize.

“B, C” I yelled, making another gravitational field pulling the bullets away from where they would be walking to catch up to us. When the last few weapons were liquified I had Marco put up an Ice wall. “Guard the Chemist,” I said to Franz and Hanna before charging forward.

“Fight these cursed,” a guard yelled.

I watched as Ymir ran forward and jumped wrapping her legs around the guard neck before swinging her body weight and flipping them as his back hit the ground with a thud. I turned my attention back to the guy I spotted. This dude was ripped and he was headed straight for where Petra was. I decided to intercept him. I ran up and gave the back of his leg a good kick watching his legs fold under him. He went to reach for me but before he grabbed me I decided to introduce his face to the ceiling.

I moved on to the next person when I was sure he wasn’t getting back up. I looked around to make sure none of my teammates were in trouble. Levi was handling himself fine. Mina was even kicking some ass. No one seemed to be in danger until I saw four people surrounding Reiner. I know he can handle himself, but a little help couldn’t hurt.

I ran over as the guy sneaking up behind him was about to swing. “Watch your six,” I called out as I roundhouse kicked the guy behind him in the face.

“Didn’t know you were that flexible,” I heard Jean call out a little behind me.

“I did,” I heard Levi say a little behind him.

“Not the time idiots,” I yelled back shaking my head. They need to take this a little more seriously.

“I don’t need your help, I have this perfectly under control,” he mumbled.

“Sure you do,” I said, staying behind him staring down the guards who looked like they were rethinking their choices.

I waited until I saw an opening “Duck!” I yelled and Reiner dropped to the floor. I used his shoulder to step up and jump off it landing my foot against one of their faces.

While Reiner was on the ground and the other guards were distracted looking at me he took the moment to sweep their legs out from under them. Before they could even try and get up Berthold came out of nowhere to help Riener take care of them. I looked around to see who else needed help. That’s when I realized everyone was pretty much taken care of. All the guards that were still conscious were tied up by Hanji's vines. Hanji was going around to all the unconscious guards and tying them up too. Good, we can never be too careful.

We had Petra walk over with us to help us open some of the cages. Some of the guards were shouting obscenities at us, but we didn’t pay them any attention. At least we weren’t the ones tied up. I watched as one guard shouted something and Petra stopped.

“Who said that?” she asked.

“Said what?” Honestly, I wasn’t even listening to half of the things they were saying.

“Which one just spoke?” She asked.

Ymir pointed at the guard laying by her feet. “He did,” she said, pointing him out for her. I watched as she marched up to him with Levi not far behind her. “So you are the one who was talking shit about blue badges. You look as pathetic as you sound,” her tone dripping with venom. She kneeled down and untied him. He stood up a little confused at first but was about to swing at her.

“What are you doing?” I asked running over but before I could say anything she punched him knocking him out cold.

“Making it a fair fight,” she said before walking back over to the cages and going back to helping people out of them.

“Did she just-?” I asked Levi.

“Yup, the real kicker,” he said looking at me, “she doesn’t even feel guilty about it.”

“That was so awesome!” Ymir yelled, “that shocked even Ils-.” She cut herself off by throwing her hands over her mouth. Everyone just froze and looked at her.

“Ilsa’s here?” Reiner asked, his voice cracked for a moment before rage flashed through him. “Has she been here the whole time? How long were you going to-.”

“Enough,” I cut him off. “This is not the time to discuss this. We can do it when we get back.” I said before feeling my chest tighten. I mean I figured as much when she and Levi got all secretive, but assuming it’s true is different from actually knowing.

We finished letting out all of the prisoners. “We need to get them back,” I said and Erwin nodded. He opened the portal and walked through making sure it was clear to send them back. “Everyone else, try to get as much information as you can from the guards that are still conscious.” I knew we probably wouldn’t get much but it was worth a chance. Everyone started walking around talking to them and threatening them while I kept an eye on the people we just saved.

“It’s clear,” he said before giving them the go-ahead to walk through. Once all the people had walked through he let them know he was going to close the portal. “Wait there we will be right back.”

“What’s the matter?” I wondered why he didn’t just leave the portal open.

“The other team needs the exit portal,” he said. “To not overdo it I need to focus on this,” he said taking a deep breath and closing his eyes. That’s right it must be hard making a portal that he doesn’t have any contact with. Normally he would have contact with at least one end of the portals, but not this time.

We finished asking the guards as much as we could all we figure out is that they really want us to go to hell and to fuck ourselves. Just as I thought it was a long shot, but it was worth trying still.

“They just finished getting their prisoners through. They are coming through now. He said letting me know they were almost through.

“That’s fine,” I said before hearing several loud shots ring out.

I watched Erwin go down before feeling a sudden pain shoot through my back. I too fell to the ground. I turned just enough to see what was happening. The two guards Armin and Franz knocked out in the hallway had come to it seems.

I watched as everything happened in slow motion. Mina was the next to go down. Jean tried to turn to see what was happening just to get shot. Marco jumped over him as he fell to the floor. Levi had jumped over me before looking up towards them to use his powers to get the guns away from them. Before he could I watch as Ymir who had stepped in front of Christa went down. Right as Levi got the guns away from the first one the last one fired again before Levi could get the gun away from him too. I watched as Berthold jumped in front of Reiner and hit the floor with a loud thud. Hanji quickly used her vines to tie them up before freezing up; she didn’t know who to run to first.

“Franz I need you to copy Erwin’s power and make us a portal home!” Levi yelled.

Everything was starting to get really blurry I looked around and couldn't see much of what was happening. Where did they get shot? Who was moving who wasn’t?

I felt as Levi picked me up right as my vision started to blacken. “Don’t you dare die on me,” Levi said and that was the last thing I could hear before I lost consciousness. Shit, this wasn’t supposed to happen. Not again.


	91. What Happened

My eyes shot open and I went to sit up before feeling my body being pushed back down, but not before a sharp pain radiated through my whole body starting in my lower back. “Don’t you fucking dare,” I heard Levi’s voice say before my eyes could even focus on him. He was sitting up in bed with both his arms holding me down by my shoulders to keep me from sitting up again.

“What happened?” The last thing I remember… what was the last thing I remember. We were at the camp and we were waiting for the other team to go through when I saw Erwin go down… He was shot… I was shot. A lot of people we shot. I’m back in my room in bed. What the hell happened between then and now?”

I tried to sit up again fighting against Levi’s arms that were holding me down as hard as he could. “Is everyone alright I have to go check on-.

“You will do no such thing. They are all alive and that’s all you need to worry about right now.” Levi said, trying to get me to calm down.

“Alive and okay are two different things.”

“Well not all of them have woken up yet, but right now they are breathing and their heart rate is normal and that’s all that matters.”

“But Hanji, she can heal them.”

“She did as much as she can for now, but she overworked herself to the point of backlash. She’s out of commission for a while.”

“So everyone is okay for the moment?” I asked making sure.

“As far as we know yes,” Levi said and I felt my muscles relax a little.

“Then tell me what exactly happened. I sorta remember who got shot but not where or how badly.”

Levi sat back and shook his head. I hated having him relive it but I needed to know what happened. “From the first shot?” He asked.

“If you can.”

“I was standing in the room with you all. I was next to you and Erwin as we waited for the portal to open.” I started.

“They just finished getting their prisoners through. They are coming through now.” Erwin had said.

“That’s fine,” You said back.

The first shot happened in slow motion. It was followed by two more that I didn’t even hear at first since my ears were still ringing from the first one. The sound rang out but I happened to be looking at Erwin. He instantly fell to the floor and was unresponsive. Before I even could figure out what happened the second shooter had already hit you. Instantly I moved to get in front of you and cover you in case they kept shooting at you.

I still couldn’t pinpoint where they were coming from yet, but I watched where you turned your head and followed it just in time to see Some of the others go down. Mina and Jean were next followed by Marco and Ymir. I managed to get the gun away from one of them but the other one shot Berthold before I could get his gun away too. Hanji tied them up before stopping looking to see who was the worse off. Reiner knocked them both out with a good punch to the face… Well, a few punches to the face.

I yelled at Franz to copy Erwin’s power and get us the hell out of there. He opened the portal and we all grabbed someone deciding it would be safer to heal you all when we got back to camp. I picked you up. Reiner Picked up Berthold. Christa helped Ymir out since Ymir could still walk. Armin helped Jean out since he could walk. Franz carried Marco out. Hanna carried Mina out. Hanji and Petra both carried Erwin out.

When we came through the portal we were surrounded by people. We had Franz open up the portal to get them out to the refugee camp while Hanji focused on healing. She started with Erwin who was shot three times.

“Three?” Eren asked, looking at me as his muscles tensed back up.

“He was shot in his arm, and twice in the back. He was bleeding the most and that’s because the bullet went straight through his lung and it was starting to fill up with blood. The second bullet didn’t hit any vital organs, but it did account for some internal bleeding. The bullet in his arm went straight through but only scraped against the bone.”I said, remembering in vivid detail how it looked. I could see his bone and straight through his arm. Hanji patched it up halfway. She started with the main injuries on everyone before going back and fixing the more minor ones.

“She then moved on to you since you were unconscious. I’m glad she did cause they just barely missed your spinal cord but you had a lot of internal bleeding. It ripped completely through your liver.”

“So wait how much did she heal us?” Eren asked.

“Enough so that you won’t die, but you aren’t fully healed. None of you are,” I mumbled. “She barely healed some of them because their injuries were minor.”

“What do you mean by barely?”

“I mean just enough to stop the bleeding but they still have literal holes in them,” I mumbled staring down at the ground. “There was so much blood everywhere. I felt you go limp in my arms. I thought I lost you baby.”

He reached his arm out and put it on my hand before giving me a smile, “I’m right here baby I’m not going anywhere. You can’t get rid of me that easily.”

“Good,” I leaned down and gave him a kiss on the lips.

“What happened next?” he asked not letting go of my hand making sure to give it a squeeze every once in a while.

“She ran over to Berthold who was shot in the chest and in the arm. He was also unconscious and bleeding a lot, but he remained conscious a little longer than you and Erwin did, so we figured he could wait a little longer than you two could.”

“I don’t remember exactly what was wrong with him, I stopped paying attention really to Hanji and what she was saying after hearing you were going to live. I mean, of course, I listened to make sure the others would live too but that was all I was listening for. There were too much stress and emotions and panic that I was feeling my backlash start to weigh in on me too.”

“She fixed up Mina next who was shot in the abdomen. Then she moved on to Marco who was shot in the arm and leg. Then to Marco and Ymir who were shot in their shoulders. By that point, she was at her limit and already in agonizing pain but she insisted on healing them to stop their bleeding but she blacked out after that.”

By that time all of the people were out and at the refugee camp and the portal was just closing, and the rest of the other group was coming to check on us and being filled in on what happened.

“I was going to carry you back here but with everyone else getting closer to us and being in the room filled with hundreds of people even if it was for a short time I ended up blacking out too. Apparently, I looked just as bad as I did the other day.”

“You mean-?”

“Blood and all. Apparently, it’s still just as horrifying the second time,” I laughed trying to make light of the dark situation.

“Then who carried us in here?”

“Pixis and Shadis, even though Mom wanted to carry us both they figured she might need a little help,” I couldn’t help but laugh at the thought of her dragging us both in by our feet. “Mom was actually in here until I woke up. She wanted to stay until you woke up too, but she ended up leaving about 5 minutes ago when I woke up. She went to bring us some food.”

“Oh good I’m starving,” Eren said before thinking about sitting up. Instantly I placed both his hands back on his shoulders and I glared him down before he put his hands up in surrender. “Wait what time is it? How long was I out?” Eren asked.

“It’s 5.”

“AM?” He asked cutting me off since he was surprised that he wasn’t out for very long.

“No PM,” I said letting him know that he’s been sleeping for a while.”

“Oh,” he mumbled.

“Oh my god you’re up,” Mom said walking in the room.

“I live,” Eren smiled while mom looked back at him, not amused.

“If you both scare me like that again then next time you won’t” She threatened and Eren’s smile vanished.

“Remember what I said,” she stared at the both of us.

“If you guys die I will go there and kill the guards myself,” Eren mumbled under his breath remembering.

“Damn right. I mean it,” she said before clearing her throat, “any way you boys need to eat, you haven’t eaten all day.” She dropped the scary voice and evil look in her eye and went back to her normal sweet tone of voice and loving attitude. It happened so fast it almost gave me whiplash. I forget how scary this woman can be sometimes.

Suddenly I’m not hungry anymore. I heard Eren’s thoughts and I had to stop myself from laughing in fear mom might smack me. “Um Levi,” Eren whispered, getting my attention. I looked at him and mentally he asked permission to sit up. “I need to sit up to eat.”

“Here let me help,” I said, helping him sit up without putting too much strain on where he was injured.

“Alright, I’m going to let you two eat and go check in on some of the others.”

“Has anyone else woke up yet?” I asked remembering who she said was still unconscious.

“No, not yet,” she said before slipping out of the room.

“Who's still out?” Eren asked still in the dark.

“Mina, Berthold, Erwin, and Hanji are the ones still unconscious. Everyone else has woken up at least once.”

“What do you mean at least once?” he asked.

Well both Jean and Marco have been in and out of consciousness a few times apparently. They both lost a lot of blood because of where the bullets hit. They are okay but very weak.”

“Who’s weak?” Jean asked standing leaning up against the doorway to stop from falling over. I jumped up as soon as I saw him.

“What the fuck are you doing out of bed?” I asked, having half a mind to throw him over my shoulder and using my power to keep him pinned to his bed.

“Just getting my blood pumping moving around. If I lay in that bed any longer I’m going to lose my damn mind.” He said and I rolled my eyes.

“You need to go back to bed now! You left Marco alone, what were you thinking?” I asked, staring at him. This is the last time I would want to leave Eren alone yet he had no problem leaving Marco.

“Actually, funny you say that,” I was actually going to ask for your help,” he laughed awkwardly. “I can’t stay in that bed any longer but I know you want me in bed, right?” He asked and he was hiding his thoughts so I couldn’t see where he was going with this.

“Yeah?” I asked a little hesitantly.

“I will stay in a bed the whole time if you do me a favor,” he said looking at me with a smile.

Eren burst into laughter as he figured out where he was going with this before I could have, but unfortunately, he was hiding his thoughts. The only thing they were saying was that I should go along with it.

“Okay, what’s the favor?”

“Bring Marco in here,” he smiled and I stared at both him and Eren.

“Why?”

“Because it’s so boring in there alone and we are losing our minds. Do you know how hard it is to be stuck in a room alone not able to have sex to pass the time. I mean I love him to death but we ran out of things to talk about like two hours ago.

“You weren’t even conscious two hours ago,”

“No, we decided to take a nap because we ran out of things to say, and cuddling is hard when my shoulder is fucked and Marco’s arm is fucked.”

I just looked to Eren to make sure it was fine but he seemed just as onboard with it as Jean. “Fine,” I finally groaned.

“You get in the damn bed,” I pointed to Jean, “and you don’t move,” I said pointing to Eren.

I waited until Jean got in bed before leaving. I walked into Jean and Marco’s room and Marco looked up at me a little surprised. “Wow they actually convinced you,” he laughed.

“Yeah, I don’t know how but they did,” I rolled my eyes before walking over. I had him throw his good arm over my shoulder and put my arm under his leg. I was careful as I carried him into my room. Eren and Jean were still in the bed with giant smiles on their faces as I walked in. I swear every time something bad happens it’s become a tradition for all of us to end up in one of our rooms.

Somehow I’m now in charge of taking care of three injured people instead of just the one. It was easier than I thought since they were all still out of energy. Jean passed out fairly quickly since he wasted all his energy walking in here. Eren passed out a little after eating since it hurt for him to sit up for too long. Marco I think was just tired in general so he fell asleep a little after Eren.

I just sat next to Eren playing with his hair. I couldn’t pull my eyes away from him. A part of me felt like if I did he would vanish. He was here in front of me, he was okay, but I was waiting to wake up at any moment just to be told we were both shot and Eren didn’t make it and that all of this was just my subconscious’s way to keep me sane.

I ran my finger over his cheek and felt the warmness of my skin against his. I moved my hand down to his chest and felt his heartbeat. This felt so real and a part of me knew that it was but the small part of me that was paranoid kept whispering you know it’s not real. You lose everyone you love, why would this be any different. You’re just hurting yourself even more by keeping this false reality alive.

Mom came barging in somewhat panicked that Jean and Marco mysteriously went missing. She took one look at us and rolled her eyes. “They were supposed to stay in their bed.”

“Try telling that to Jean, that’s stubborn bastard doesn’t listen to anything we say.”

“And Marco? How did he get here?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

“The stubborn bastard and my reckless idiot can be very convincing,” I laughed. “Besides it’s better if I look after them since they were kinda alone in their room.”

“Fine, fair enough,” she laughed before looking at me and squinting a little, “are you okay?”

“Tell me this is real.”

“What?”

“Tell me that this is real that I’m not just imagining that he’s okay, that they are all okay. This sounds too good to be true. Tell me I’m not just making this up. I keep feeling like if I close my eyes it will all come undone.”

“Oh hun,” she said walking over to me. She placed her hand on my cheek before placing a kiss on my forehead, “I know it might feel too good to be true, but this time we were just really lucky. This is real. They are all alive, you aren’t just imagining it.”

“Thank you,” I whispered, closing my eyes and letting the tears I was holding back silently flow. She didn’t say another word. She just hugged me close to her chest and placed a kiss on the top of my head running her fingers through my hair.

“Let it all out, hun.”


	92. Experimenting

I opened my eyes feeling overwhelming sadness and relief. I looked around just knowing that these feelings weren’t my own. I saw mom standing by the side of our bed with her eyes close humming quietly. That’s when I noticed Levi who was clinging to her as if his life depended on it. His sobs were silent but I could see him shaking and hear his uneven and jagged breathing.

“I was so scared I was going to lose him, lose all of them,” he whispered out.

“I know, but you have to remember you didn't, they are still here.” I heard her remind him.

I felt a finger lightly tap my arm on the other side of me and looked to the side to see both Jean and Marco had woken up. It seems that none of us wanted to bug them. I had to hold myself back from sitting up and wrapping my arms around him and just comforting him. I knew he needed to let it all out.

“For how long?” His voice sounded so desperate, “the other’s still haven’t woken up, we don’t even know if they will.”

“Don’t say that-” mom cut him off but he kept going.

“Even if they do what if it happens again? Who’s to say that on our next mission that someone else won’t get hurt or killed. We already lost Ilsa, I can’t lose anyone else, especially not him.”

“I know hun I know.”

I couldn’t hold back any longer. I forced myself to sit up and put a hand on his back. His head whipped around. “You shouldn’t be sitting up,” he said, instantly trying to pretend that nothing was wrong and instantly jumping into taking care of me.

I ignored him and wrapped my arms around him. “You won’t lose me. You know damn well I’m too stubborn to die.”

“Yeah he may be a reckless asshole, but he’s also a stubborn bastard. When he sets his mind to something nothing can stop him until he reaches that goal. So if he has his mind set on living with you then death has no chance,” Jean said awkwardly, doing his best to try and cheer Levi up.

Mom quietly excused herself, “I’m going to check on the others,” she said leaving us all to talk.

Even though Levi was just scolding me for sitting up he was holding me close to him. I think the only thing stopping him from squeezing the life outta me was he was afraid to hurt me.

Levi looked up at the other two behind me and rolled his eyes, “get your asses over here. Carefully,” he said, extending an arm showing he wanted to give them a hug.

“Levi initiating a group hug I’ve seen it all,” Jean mocked him as he scooted in to accept the hug.

“I’ve done it before,” he mumbled.

“Yeah but it’s rare.”

Marco just carefully moved his leg out of the way before leaning in. The group hug was a lot different from our normal ones. Everyone was too afraid to hurt the others so I could barely feel their arms around me.

“That was a lame-ass hug,” I mumbled.

“Well hurry up and get better so we can give you a better one,” Levi said, forcing a smile.

We all sat back and Levi had me lay back down carefully as we all talked. We all got everything out in the open. We talked about how scared we were in the moment and even after We were all still worried about the others. The only thing stopping me from getting up and going to check on them was well Levi. If I even tried to get up he would pin me to the bed with his powers. The last thing I need him doing is overusing his abilities on my account.

“Okay spill what’s on your mind?” Annie finally asked me as she sat up in the bed.

“What do you mean?”

“Mikasa cut the crap you haven’t said a single word since last night.”

“So, I don’t usually talk much anyway. Why does it suddenly mean something’s wrong?”

“Because you normally at least talk to me. So tell me why. Is it because you’re worried about them? Or did I just piss you off?”

“I mean sure I’m worried but that’s not it, and no it’s not anything you did.” How could I explain this without thinking about it? The whole reason I’ve been quiet is because I’ve been trying to distract myself from the harsh reality of the situation.

“Then tell me what’s going on,” She said looking me in the eyes. I could never say no with her gorgeous eyes staring into mine like that.

“Well, all of this has got me thinking,” I forced out already feeling my muscles tense up. “They could have died.”

“Yeah,” she said knowing that by the way, I sounded there was more to it.

“Well what if this happens again? What if next time when we are all on a mission together we get surrounded and everyone gets gunned down.” I finally blurted out before looking her in her eyes. “I realized that I would be the only survivor. I would be forced to live with this guilt. I would have to watch the rest of you die.” I slammed my eyes shut and wrapped my arms around myself. I clenched my teeth so tight I felt my jaw ache.

“That’s not going to happen, my love, look at me,” she said putting her hands lightly against my cheeks and moving my head up. I opened my eyes and was met with hers. “That will never happen, but even if it does I will make sure you aren’t alone. You won’t carry that guilt alone. I’ll help you shoulder it all.”

“But you-”

“I could live through a hail of bullets if I harden my skin. Hell, I could try and save people too, but even if I was too late to do that I would still make sure to be with you I won’t leave you alone. I’ll be by your side no matter what okay doll.”

“Okay,” I mumbled before leaning in and letting my lips brush against hers. I pulled back when a thought crossed my mind.

“Do you know where Franz would be at this time?” I asked and she glared at me.

“You better give me a better kiss than whatever the fuck that was,” she said staring me down.

I just leaned back in and gave her an actual kiss before finally pulling away. “Good, now why do you want Franz?”

“I want to see something.”

I left the room and she followed, probably curious of where my head was at. I found him and Hanna sitting at a table. “Franz,” I said getting his attention as we approached. He turned his head around to see me and waved.

“Hey Mikasa, did you need something?”

“I need you to take my powers away for a minute.”

“What?” Annie asked behind me wondering if I’ve lost my mind.

He just froze for a second processing my request. “Um, why?”

“I just want to feel something I’ve never felt before.” Well, I guess I can’t say never since I felt it when I was a kid but I don’t really remember what it felt like.

“Um,” he looked behind me and then back at me. I turned around and saw Annie staring him down as if to tell him not to.

“Don’t mind her,” I said turning back around.

“She’s going to kill me if I do it though.”

“No, she won’t.”

“Yes she will,” Annie growled.

I turned around and whispered in her ear, “My Jewel please I promise I will be okay. Remember you will be by my side the whole time nothing can go wrong with you there.”

She stared at me for a moment before sighing. “You know I can’t refuse when you look at me like that.”

“Perfect,” I said before turning back around, “okay now will you since she agrees not to hurt you?”

“Um. I guess,” he said awkwardly, putting his hand out. I touched his hand before looking him in the eyes. “Alright you have ten minutes before your powers return,” he said, giving me a heads up.

“Perfect, that will be more than enough time,” I said before heading back to my room with Annie right on my trail.

“What are you going to do?”

“I’m going to find a knife.”

“What! Why?” She asked worriedly.

“Cause I want to remember what pain feels like.”

“So you’re going to stab yourself for shits and giggles.”

“No, I’m not going to stab myself, I'm just going to make a cut on my skin.”

“That’s so stupid why would you-.”

“Look I’m not doing this just to feel pain. I also wonder if when my power returns if the wound will stay or if it will heal itself. If when my power returns if the cut is still there and bleeding will it still bleed or will it stop? If the wound stays will it hurt when I touch it?”

“Why are you worried about this all of the sudden?”

“I don’t know this whole thing has got me thinking. I wondered how much pain they were in. I mean I’ve been shot countless times but I’ve never actually been hurt like that. I know a small cut isn’t the same thing but it just makes me wonder,” I shrugged.

“Fine,” she rolled her eyes before sitting on the bed. I pulled out a knife and looked at her. Her eyes were following the knife around. I put the knife to the palm of my hand and pressed down. Even without my super strength, I pressed down way harder than I meant to. I winced as the red liquid dripped from my hand. She jumped up and pulled the knife away from me.

“That’s way more than a small cut,” she yelled.

“I know it was an accident I didn’t expect so little resistance,” I said looking down at my hand. Are normal people really this fragile. She grabbed one of her shirts that were nearby and wrapped my hand up.

“Damn I hope you do stop bleeding cause if not you might need stitches.”

“Stitches?”

“Yes stitches, Hanji is out cold and can’t heal you. However, if you’re still bleeding when your powers come back it will be impossible for you to get stitches,” she let out a groan, “this is why I was against this I knew you were going to do something stupid, but this-.” her voice cut out as she frantically looked around the room for something anything that could help.

“How long till your powers come back?” she asked.

“Maybe 2 or 3 minutes at most.”

“Fuck,” she whispered. “Do we get help? Do we wait it out and hope you stop bleeding? What do we do?” she asked looking up at me.

I just stood there how was I supposed to know? I mean I don’t even know how much blood I’ve lost already is this the normal amount? Is this too much? She’s asking the wrong person here. “Maybe we wait and hope it stops bleeding?” I shrugged.

We waited and after three minutes she pulled her shirt away from my hand to see if the wound was healed or at least stopped bleeding. The wound was still there but there was so much blood sitting in my hand I couldn’t tell if it was still bleeding or not.

She looked at it a little longer before finally grabbing my arm and leading me to the bathrooms to clean up my hand. She put my hand under the water and ouch. Wait ouch? It still hurts? Has my powers actually come back yet?

To test I just punched the wall seeing if it would hurt forgetting about my super strength. My hand went straight through the wall without any pain. No, my powers are definitely back.

“What was that?” She asked.

“I was checking to see if my powers were back,” I said before looking through the hole in the wall. “Forgot my own strength,” I mumbled before making a mental note to tell Pixis we need to fix a hole in the bathroom.

“My hand stung when you put it under the water,” I said and she looked down at my wound. It wasn’t bleeding anymore but neither of us were sure if it stopped before or after my powers came back. I poked it with my finger and sure enough that hurt. “Ow,” I mumbled.

“Ow, what do you mean ow?” she asked, “you can feel pain now?”

“Only where the cut is,” I said looking down at it.

“Well this answers some of my questions, but now I have even more questions.”

“Don’t even fucking think about it,” She said glaring me down, “You are never doing that again.”

“I mean I won’t say never, but not for a while,” I said and she rolled her eyes.

“Sometimes I forget you are related to Eren and then you do some reckless shit like that and then I can really see the family resemblance.”


	93. Too Good to Be True

I sat down in the chair in Pixis’s office across from him and just waited. When he finally came into the room and looked at me he let out a sigh and took a seat across from me. “What’s on your mind Shadis?” He asked.

“What’s on my mind? You know damn well what’s on my mind.”

“Look I get that you were concerned about the missions, especially with us splitting up, but-.”

“But!” I cut him off. “I told you they weren’t ready. I told you it was dangerous. I told you that something bad was going to happen and you brushed me off.”

“I didn’t brush you off. I was clear with everyone that there were risks involved they all knew. They all still made the choice to go.”

“You could have called off the mission.”

“Then what?” He asked. “Have everyone pissed off at us? Knowing some of them whether we gave them permission or not they were going on that mission. There was no stopping them.” His voice was calm and it pissed me off.

“This is why I was against everyone going on missions in the first place. Do you even realize what could have happened? All those people could have died and you are sitting here like you couldn’t care less.”

“You know I care!” he raised his voice for a second before clearing his throat. “I care about everyone here, but I know damn well who we are dealing with. You expect them to sit idly by while people are getting hurt, while their rights are being taken away? You know as well as I do that they would never stand for it. The whole reason we started to let them go on missions was that they were sneaking off and doing them anyway, or have you forgotten?”

“No, I haven’t forgotten,” I mumbled.

“They aren’t children anymore. Most of them are adults, and even the teenagers would raise hell if we try to take them off missions. They all want to fight whether we want them to or not,” his voice faded out with the last few words and I realized that he wasn’t fully behind them going on these missions either. He always seemed so sure about it, but just now he slipped up and showed me that we are both in the same position. We want to protect them, but neither of us knows exactly how to go about it.

There was a knock behind us before I could say anything. We both turned to look and were greeted by Ms. Magnolia. “Sorry to interrupt, but I just thought I should let you know that Jean and Marco snuck into Eren and Levi’s room so in case you go to check up on them I thought you might want to know where they were at.”

“Thank you,” Pixis said.

“They should be in their own rooms,” I mumbled, rolling my eyes.

“I know, but they are stubborn,” she laughed. “Oh also, Hanji woke up. She’s in no position to heal anyone and she’s still very weak and out of it, but she’s okay as far as I can tell.”

“Is Molbit still in with her?” Pixis asked.

“Yes, he had me wait with her while he went to get her water.”

“Good, I don’t want her alone. We still don’t know what kind of backlash she had. We know she passed out, but we don’t know what else might have happened.”

“Well, I don’t think he’s planning on leaving her side any time soon.”

“Any news on the others?” I asked hoping to hear maybe someone else woke up too.

“No, Mike is still watching over Erwin and he says there’s no news he can give us, and Reiner is still watching Berthold.”

“Who is with Mina?” Pixis asked.

“Hanna and Franz have been switching off watching her all night. Last I checked Hanna was in with her.”

“Good.”

“Oh, and before I forget, Molbit wanted to talk to you both about what he heard this morning.”

“Oh, I see. Do you mind taking over with Hanji while he comes and talks to us?” Normally we would just go straight to him, but it’s probably best not to stress Hanji out anymore with whatever news he might have.

“Sure, I’ll send him right in,” she said before disappearing out the door.

“So are you done yelling at me for the day or do I have to expect to finish that conversation later?” Pixis asked, turning back towards me.

“I haven’t decided,” I mumbled knowing damn well the conversation was already over and we probably wouldn’t pick it up until the next time something like this happens. Then again I’m hoping something like this never happens again but I know that’s too optimistic of a thought to be the reality.

Molbit poked his head in the room, “you wanted to see me?”

“Ms. Magnolia told us you had information,” Pixis said gesturing towards the chair.

“Yes, well just like we suspected all of the camps that we have raided have now vanished, it’s like they were never even there to begin with.”

“The government covering their own asses,” I mumbled.

“The guards from the previous camps have been stationed at some of the other camps meaning that they are permanently raising the number of guards everywhere.”

“Meaning it will be impossible to raid any more camps,” Pixis mumbled. I mean we had already expected that.

“Yes, also while I was out I overheard some of the guards talking about transporting some prisoners.”

“How many Prisoners?” Pixis asked before Molbit could finish what he was saying.

“Two, however,” he paused for a moment, rubbing the back of his neck, “it seems too good to be true.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well there are only two prisoners who are suspected red badges, and 4 guards in total. The drop off point is in a ghost town surrounded by nothing but miles of nothing.

“So you think it’s a trap?” I asked.

“I’m not sure. With how it sounds probably.”

“When is this supposedly going down? Pixis asked.

“Tonight. Between 2 and 3 am.”

This definitely sounds suspicious, but I know Pixis wouldn’t pass up an opportunity like this. He would insist on going alone and handling it so I beat him to it. “I’ll go check it out.” He whipped his head around to look at me and before he could say anything there was a knock behind us.

“Pixis? Oh sorry, it looks like you all are busy,” Mikasa said poking her head in the room.

“It’s alright did you need something?” I asked before Pixis could send her away to yell at me.

“Um, well, I kinda wanted to let you know there’s a hole in the bathroom wall now.”

I blinked a few times trying to process what she said. “A hole?” I repeated making sure I heard her. “Why?”

“Um, long story,” she rubbed at the back of her neck and I saw a cut on her hand.

“You got hurt,” I stood up and walked over before realizing that her power is invincibility. “How did you get hurt?” I asked, taking a look at her hand.

“Even longer story,” she mumbled “anyway I just wanted to let you guys know.” She said before turning and leaving.

Once again these kids leave me with more questions than answers.

“Well,” Pixis sighed, “that was a lot of information to try and process in one minute,” he said mostly to himself. “Where were we before? Oh right. Like hell, you will be going on the mission alone. I'll go with you.”

“You can’t. Everyone here looks up to you for answers you can’t go on a suicide mission.”

“But you can?”

“I’m expendable, you aren’t.”

“You aren’t expendable.”

“It doesn’t matter I’m going on this mission alone.”

“Mission? Can I join?” another voice said from the doorway. We looked back to see who it was now and saw Reiner walk in.

“Sorry, to barge in, but I was passing by when I heard there was a new mission.”

“There isn’t a mission,” I said quickly.

“But you just said?”

“You heard wrong,” I quickly cut him off.

“You’re full of shit old man,” he glared at me. “Look I know there’s a mission and I want on. I can’t just sit here on my ass all day I need to do something.”

“Reiner,” Pixis said calmly, breaking the tension in the room for a moment. “I thought you were watching Berthold?”

“I was, I had Annie take over so I could grab something to drink.”

“Do you really want to go on a mission even if it means leaving him behind?” he asked.

He paused for a moment to think before nodding, “Yes. I need to get out of here and help. Sitting in that room isn’t going to make him wake up, but going out and helping people can actually make a damn difference.”

“Shadis, the call is yours,” Pixis said sitting back and looking at me.

Like hell, I’m letting him join the mission. “This mission is probably a trap,” I said hoping that would make him want to back out.

“So, it’s still worth checking out on the slightest chance it isn’t.”

This damn kid. “It’s too dangerous-.”

“Sir, with all due respect all of our missions are dangerous. I am prepared to fight like hell for what I believe in no matter what. I want to help and I’m skilled enough for anything they throw at us. That is unless you are doubting my skills.”

This little shit. “Of course I’m not doubting your skills, I just don’t want any more people to get hurt because of a half-baked plan based on sketchy information.”

“I don’t want anyone else getting hurt either, which is why I think I should go on this mission. Who do you have for it so far?” he asked.

“I’m the only one scheduled for it.”

“Well that’s stupid.” he said without hesitation, “if you go alone especially thinking it’s a trap then you’re going on a suicide mission. At least let me have your back.”

“No.”

“Why? Again do you not trust my skills in the field?” he asked, staring me down.

“I trust your skills,” I said again. He won’t give up. Not until I cave. His level of determination even if I don’t he will probably still find a way around it.

I looked to Pixis for help but he just raised an eyebrow almost as if to ask what do you want me to do about it. He just gave me a shrug and sat back. Damn him. He’s no help.

I looked back at Reiner who was staring me down waiting for me to cave in. These damn kids will be the death of me. All I wanted was to keep them safe but no matter what I do they are always going to be reckless little shits who don’t listen. He is strong. I'll give him that. He is quick on his feet and knows how to fight, and he’s wrong. I don’t doubt his skill, not one bit. I doubt mine. What if I slip up and he pays the price for it? What if I’m unable to protect him out there.

“Sir, please trust in my abilities and let me have your back on this mission,” he said without hesitation.

I let out a sigh knowing that no matter what he was going to be on the mission. Even if I say no he will find a way to sneak onto it. “Molbit brief him I need to get something to drink,” I said just making an excuse to leave the room and get some fresh air without being stared down by anyone else in the room.


	94. Get Over Yourself Reiner

I went back into the room right as Molbit finished briefing him. I hoped hearing how little information we had might convince him to stay behind, but I knew the second I walked in the room he was determined. He looked at me and gave me a nod. “When do we leave?” He asked. I just let out a sigh knowing that nothing I could say would stop him from tagging along.

“I’m leaving at two to make sure Franz’s power has time to recharge so he can bring us home since Erwin is still out of commission.

“Okay, do you want to do any training beforehand or are we just going into it?”

“We don’t know enough to practice for it. Like Molbit explained we are going in blind and we are sure this is probably a trap.”

“Okay, then I’ll meet you in the common area just before 2 am. Until then if you need me I’ll be in my room.”

He left and I let out a sigh. Great, this is just great now not only do I have to worry about this being a trap but I also have to babysit now.

“So when put in a difficult situation you ended up caving,” Pixis said once we were left alone in his office. “How hypocritical of you.”

“It’s not like I had much of a choice. He wasn’t going to give up. Not to mention that you were no help. You could have tried to talk him out of it. They listen to you more than they listen to me.”

“You think?” he laughed, “I don’t think it matters who tells them what I think no matter what they are going to be just as stubborn.”

I just sat back in the chair and rolled my eyes. “Whatever.”

“Pixis, Shadis, Good news,” Ms. Magnolia said walking into the room. We both turned to look at her, “Mina woke up!”

“That’s good,” Pixis let out a sigh of relief and so did I. Now we are just waiting on Berthold and Erwin.

I walked back into the room and saw Annie leaning up against the wall watching Berthold. “Can I go now?” She asked seeing me walk back in.

“Yes, thanks for watching him,” I mumbled before going back to sit on the bed next to him. I didn’t want to take my eyes off him. “If he’s not up before 1 am can you watch him? I'm going on a mission tonight.”

“A mission? No one told us there was a mission.”

“That’s because it was a last-minute one. Don’t worry about it, it should be an easy one.” I lied knowing damn well if I told her we were walking into a trap she would march straight down to Pixis’s office and threaten them to cancel it. She doesn’t tell us she cares, but she sure does show it.

“Fine, then it shouldn’t take you long to get back?”

“Two hours at most,” I said. I mean if we left at 2 and the mission was supposed to happen at 3 then we would definitely be back well before 4 but I gave us some leeway in case something goes wrong.

“Alright, I’ll watch him. What do I tell him if he wakes up and you aren’t here?”

“That I love him and I’ll be back soon.”

“Sappy shit,” she mumbled.

“Yes sappy shit,” I said, turning back to look at him. He looked so peaceful. So fragile. I wanted to reach my hand out and run my fingers through his hair, but I felt like if I touched him I would hurt him more.

She started heading out of the room but not before stopping in the doorway and turning back around. “Hey, whatever happened it wasn’t your fault.”

“You weren’t there.”

“No I wasn’t, but unless you picked up the gun and shot him yourself it wasn’t your fault.”

“He jumped in front of me. That bullet was meant for me not him. I mean what would you do if Mikasa- Never mind it’s not like it matters since she literally can’t get hurt. You have no clue how I feel and you never will.” I turned back towards him. She’s a hypocrite. I know damn well if it was possible for something to happen to Mikasa and something did she would be feeling exactly like I do.

“Reiner, I mean this in the nicest way possible. Get over yourself.”

My eyes shot up to hers and before I knew it I was on my feet. Now she’s trying to pick a fight. “What did you-.”

“Don’t try and square up with me. When I say get over yourself I’m not trying to fight. I’m trying to say that you dwelling on what you should have done or what you did or didn’t do isn’t going to help him. So stop with the pity party and take care of your damn boyfriend. You think he took that bullet for you wanting you to blame yourself for it? Or do you think that if the roles were reversed you wouldn’t take the bullet for him?”

“Of course I would!”

“Then would you want him blaming himself for it?” She asked and I froze. My eyes fell to the ground.

“I hate it when you're right,” I mumbled.

“Then stop doing shit you know is wrong,” she said before walking out of the room. I just walked back over and plopped on the bed next to Berthold. Well, I should get some sleep before tonight, but I don’t want to take my eyes off him. What if he wakes up while I’m sleeping? What if something else happens while I’m sleeping? What if he stops breathing and-.” No stop, I can’t be thinking like that. They said he is okay. He will be okay. I need to get some rest and I’ll be lying right next to him.

I laid down on the bed and had to stop myself from scooting closer to him. I didn’t want to hurt him. I just have to keep my distance for now. I closed my eyes but moved my hand out to grab his. I let my hand lightly sit over the top of his hoping that he would squeezy my hand like he always does, but it never happened. I just focused on getting some sleep. Even though it took me a while I managed to fall asleep eventually.

I opened my eyes a while later and before I could sit up I felt a familiar feeling. An arm around me? I looked up and saw Berthold’s eyes meet mine. “You’re awake,” he said happily.

“That’s my line,” I couldn’t help but smile as relief washed over me. “I have to go tell mom and Pixis that you woke up.”

“No need I already did. Mom came in about an hour ago to check in and I told her then.”

“You’ve been up for an hour. Why didn’t you wake me?”

“Actually it was closer to two hours, and because you looked exhausted. You needed sleep.”

“Wait what time is it?” I asked sitting up and looking around.

“About 1 am why?”

“Oh good, because I have to leave at 2.”

“What why?”

“I’m going on a mission with Shadis tonight.”

“I’m going too,” he said sitting up and wincing a bit as he did.

“No. I can’t let you come with me this time. It will be too dangerous especially if you are still healing. It shouldn’t take us long, it's just a quick simple mission. Just try and get some rest until I get back.” I hated lying to him, but if he knew I might be walking into a trap he would never let me go, but I can’t just let Shadis go alone on this one he needs some backup. Not to mention I have a debt I owe him I can’t just ignore it.

“How am I supposed to rest knowing you will be out there?”

I leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek before putting my hand in my pocket and feeling the plastic. I pulled it out of my pocket and had him hold out his hand before putting it in the palm of his hand and wrapping his fingers around it.

He opened his hand and looked at it. “A plastic ring?” he asked, confused.

“A promise. That when this is all over I’ll give you a real one.”

He just let out a big smile before slipping on the plastic ring. “Well, then I’ll wear this one until then so you won’t forget.”

I leaned in and placed a kiss on his lips before leaning over and whispering in his ear. “I have to get ready now, but I love you and I promise I’ll be back soon.”

I finished getting dressed before walking over to Berthold one last time before I had to leave. “I love you,” I said leaning in and placing a kiss on his lips.

“You promise you will be home soon?”

“Yes, cross my heart,” I smiled seeing Annie standing in the doorway. “Until then Annie promised to hang out with you.

“You mean keep an eye on me?”

“Same thing.”

I leaned in and gave him one last kiss and gave his cheek a light pinch, “love you.” I said walking out the door hearing him whisper it back.

Annie nudged my arm as I walked by. She didn’t say anything but I knew that was her way of telling me to stay safe out there.

I headed into the common area and saw Shadis walking up in his costume. “Ready?” he asked.

“Ready as I’ll ever be.” I nodded.


	95. Somethings Wrong

I put my mask on and watched as Reiner did the same. Pixis, Thomas, and Franz walked up and I looked at all of them trying to read the situation. Pixis was the only other one in costume. “Are you supposed to be our backup?” Reiner asked before I could.

“Yes.” He answered plainly.

How did he expect to teleport in to help us? Once Franz uses his power he will probably take the full hour to recharge and be able to use his power again. Anything before that there’s no guarantee he will be able to hold it long enough to make a difference. As it is with his power we only have about a ten-minute window. What happens if Pixis has to be sent in and then Franz is unable to use his power a third time in that short period of time?

“And Thomas?” I asked trying to figure out why he was here.

“He is going to link Franz, me, and you so you can contact me in case things go sideways, or when you need Franz to open the portal again. Franz will be inside of Erwins room as soon as the portal closes here.” Pixis explained.

“You don’t have to worry about us too much Shadis and I got this don’t we?” Reiner asked, giving my arm a nudge as he smiled.

I hope. “We will make this as quick as possible.” I nodded.

“Alright, open the portal Franz,” Pixis nodded to him. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes before opening the portal. It took him a minute probably since I think he was remembering the location they had told him. He opened his eyes just as the portal finished opening.

“There we go,” he mumbled.

Thomas quickly used his powers to connect us and I mentally prepared myself for what I was walking into. I had to protect Reiner. I can’t let one of the kids get hurt because I’m not strong enough to protect him.

I was about to walk through when I felt a hand on my arm. I looked back and saw it was Pixis’s. “Good luck out there,” he said before letting his hand fall away from me. I could tell he didn’t want us to go. He wanted to call off the mission then and there.

I just gave him a nod back. I didn’t know what else to say. I mean I agreed with him this mission was dangerous and I would rather have no one go at all, but if I didn’t go I knew he would.

Before I could say anything else Reiner walked through the portal. I just forced myself to follow. When we were through Reiner took a look around before sticking his hand back through giving them the thumbs up. The portal closed behind us as we started walking.

We weren’t that far away and after walking for a while we finally found where they would be. We arrived a little early and hid where we thought we would be safe and kept our head down until it was time. We kept an eye out and stayed perfectly quiet listening to any noise we heard to make sure we weren’t found. When we started to hear voices and footsteps in the distance we knew it was time.

We quietly started to move closer in until we had a good line of sight. We stayed put as two more guards started to walk up. They must be the ones that are joining for the transfer. Everything seems normal enough I don’t see anyone else. Maybe this isn’t a trap.

“So what do you say? I think we can take em,” Reiner whispered to me.

Something still felt off about this. Why do they have only four guards? Are they planning on transferring them by foot? Is there a camp nearby that we didn’t know about?

“I don’t know yet.” I need to decide fast. Is the feeling of something being off because there’s something actually off or because we were convinced beforehand that this was a trap? Am I just overthinking things here?

“Well we are going to have to make the decision is now or never. They are starting to move,” he said and I knew I had to make a choice then and there. Give up right here or continue on with the mission as planned.

“Alright, I’ll take the guards in the back you get the ones in the front,” I said making the choice to continue on with the mission.

“Okay, how do you want to do this? Do you want to take them out first? At the same time?”

“I’ll take mine out first when they go down. You go for the other two I’ll help if needed I should be done dealing with the two in the back by then.”

“Okay, but I won’t need help,” he said confidently.

“Follow my lead,” I said and we started to walk forward.

“What’s taking them so long?” I mumbled practically pacing back and forth. Shadis’s last update was that they were proceeding with the mission with caution. It’s been 5 minutes now I should have heard from him by now.

“Hey get back in your damn room you idiot!” I heard Annie yelling behind me.

“I can’t lay there any longer. I need to be out here for when he comes back.” Berthold said before walking up to me. “Pixis, do you know how long they were supposed to be gone?” he asked me. I could tell he was worried.

“I mean there wasn’t a specific time they were scheduled to be back by, but last contact was just a few moments ago and everything seemed to be going just fine,” I said trying to reassure him.

Annie walked up and started threatening Berthold until he sat down and leaned against the wall for support. I just ignored them and focused on waiting for something… anything to come through. I’m starting to worry now. He was giving me constant updates and all of a sudden they stopped. Did something happen? Should I go in after them?

Just as I was about to march over to where Franz was and have him send me in I heard Shadis’s voice in my head. “Mission was a success we will let you know when we are back in position for the portal.”

Relief washed over me, "the mission was a success they will be heading back in a few minutes." I said reassuring Berthold that everything was okay.

"Oh good," he smiled letting his head fall back and lean against the wall. He closed his eyes and I saw as his muscles relaxed.

I just stood there waiting for Franz or Shadis to check in and say that they were portalling back. I knew it would take them a few minutes to get back to the extraction area. The minutes seemed to drag on for forever. They sure are taking a long time getting back. They sure do like taking their time with things tonight it seems.

A few more minutes dragged on and I was starting to worry again. I'm sure they are fine right? I mean they just checked in. They probably just got a little turned around heading back. I'm sure they will check in any second now.

After a few more minutes dragged on I knew I wasn't imagining this anymore. Somethings wrong. I asked Shadis for an update and when I got no answer I started to worry. Could Thomas's power have worn off already?

No, I can still hear you. Franz said, answering back. Something's wrong. Something's definitely wrong.

Before I could run to where Franz was he came in and met me in the common area. "I'm sending you in to check it out." He whispered trying not to worry anyone else in the room.

I quickly put my mask on as he opened the portal. I ran straight through and took off running in the direction they were supposed to head to for the mission. I didn't bother with the stealth aspect. I knew something was wrong and I had to get there fast.

When I finally made it to where they were I told Franz to open the portal showing him a mental image so he knew where exactly I needed it. Guards were charging forward at them from every direction. Damn, it was a trap. When I got to them I saw what had gone down. I had no time to process what happened. I just pulled my eyes away and I quickly grabbed his arm and pulled him through the portal telling Franz to shut it behind us.

Right as we came through a guard stuck his head and hand through to try and grab at us just as the portal closed. His head and arm hit the floor with a thud as they were severed. His head rolling towards Franz's feet.

"Did-did I just-did I just kill a man?" He asked, staring at the head with a pure look of horror on his face.

I quickly put my hand over his eyes trying to do damage control, but there was so much more damage that couldn't be fixed. Not only would Franz be traumatized for life by this, but there was so much more wrong with what just happened. They were too busy staring at the head to realize that only one person came back through the portal with me.


	96. I Slipped Up

Everything started happening in slow motion Berthold ripped his eyes away from the head on the floor and looked up at me before his eyes landed on the person I had pulled through the portal with me. I saw as a million emotions went through him before he quietly asked. “Where’s Reiner?”

I just opened my mouth and closed it again. What was I supposed to say? I don’t even know what happened. I just saw the aftermath and it wasn’t pretty. He forced himself off the floor, ripping his eyes away from mine and looking at Shadis. “Where is he?”

“Berthold,” I started to say but he cut me off.

“No where is he!” his voice raised.

Shadis was staring down at his hands that were covered in blood that you could tell wasn’t his own. I couldn’t even tell if he could hear us or if he was too in shock to process what was happening around him.

“Where the hell is Reiner. Where is my boyfriend!” Berthold yelled.

Shadis just fell to his knees shaking his head as his voice started to crack. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“I don’t believe you. This isn’t funny, stop joking around,” he said more desperate than ever.

Annie just put her hand on Berthold’s shoulder. I could tell she was forcing back any emotions as she asked, “What happened.”

“Follow my lead,” I had told Reiner. I still wasn’t sure about the whole situation, but everything seemed to check out. Maybe I was just overthinking it. We got closer to them making it easier to take them down quicker before they even realized what was happening. We waited for an opening where it seemed easier to take them down silently following behind them waiting in the shadows for a little while. When I saw a perfect opening I gave him a tap on the shoulder indicating to move now.

I grabbed the guard in the back while I used my power on the guard next to him sending so much pain through him that he fell to the floor unconscious. The other guard struggled in my arms before I was able to knock him out.

I looked up to see Reiner had punched out one guard and was wrestling the other to the floor. He slammed his head against the floor knocking him out cold and gave me a nod.

Pixis is probably worried since this was taking longer than we expected, but we had to wait for an opening where it would be easy to take them all out at once without them drawing their weapons on us.

“Tell the Protector we’re finished. I'll help the prisoners out of their cuffs,” Reiner said and I nodded.

I turned around to focus thinking back to them, “Mission was a success we will let you know when we are back in position for the portal.”

I turned back around as I started hearing a commotion. Reiner had jumped in front of me and was wrestling with one of the prisoners. He was holding a knife in his hand and before I could whip my head around to look at where the other prisoner had gone I watched as she stabbed Reiner and twisted the knife before pulling it out and backing up going on the defensive. He lost his grip on the other prisoner and I watched helplessly as the knife plunged into his chest. As he fell to his knees he forced out a few words, “It’s a trap.”

I dodged and tried to grab the knife from him as he slashed at my arm. I had no time to worry about the huge gash on my arm. I had to end this quickly and get Reiner to safety. Before I could start using my powers on him they both charged at me. I couldn’t focus my power enough to knock one out as they were both coming at me.

The man lunged at me and I was able to grab his arm and trap it between my arm and side. I managed to knock the knife out of his hand before twisting his arm, making him move just enough so I was able to grab him and wrap my arms around him in a chokehold.

As I was choking him out the girl couldn’t find an opening to stab me as I used the man as a human shield. I felt as he started to go limp knowing that he was unconscious. I watched as she pulled out a walkie talkie. She was about to call for backup. I let the unconscious man drop to the floor as I was able to focus my power on her. I let rage take over as I focused all of the pain on her until it was too much for her body. I could almost feel her heart stop beating as she fell to the floor. I fell to my knees as I felt a pain in my chest. I have never used my power to this extent. I mean using them to kill another person I never thought I would have to do it honestly I didn’t even know if I could but seeing Reiner laying there on the floor I let my rage consume me.

I could barely breathe as I felt my powers backlash. I used the rest of my energy to crawl over to where Reiner was on the floor. He was coughing and there was so much blood. I instantly tried to apply pressure to his chest wound since it was the one bleeding the most.

“Just hang on Hanji will have you patched up in no time,” I forced out as I looked him in his eyes.

I could tell he wasn’t doing too good he could barely keep his eyes open. He gave me a weak smile before putting his hand over mine. “I’m glad I could save you just like you saved me back then. You were right I’m glad I was able to stick around this long to see how good it got.”

“Don’t talk like that. You still have more stuff to see,” I said desperately. “I just have to call them and-.

“I don’t have much time left just listen to me,” Reiner said, cutting me off. I watched as his hand shakily reached down into his pocket and he pulled something out of it. He looked at me and I held my hand out as he dropped a ring in my hand. “I need you to give it to Berthold. Tell him I’ve had it since we were at the school, but I never found the right time to give it to him. Tell him I love him and I’m sorry I broke our promise.”

“You can tell him yourself you will be okay.”

He shook his head “No. You need to leave. Look around. There’s more of them coming.” I looked up and sure enough, people were coming out of all the abandoned buildings and closing in fast. Shit, I need to pick him up and run, but I can barely stand myself. I looked back down at him and froze.

“Reiner? Reiner wake up. Wake up!” I begged. I couldn’t feel him breathing anymore. I pulled him into my chest hugging him close and letting tears run down my face. This is my fault. I slipped up. I turned my back. I knew this was a trap and I let him come anyway. I should have kept my guard up. I wasn’t strong enough to protect him. I couldn’t save him.

I heard as the guards started to close in on me I could hear them loading their guns. I had no intention of leaving. If he dies here then so do I. How could I go on living knowing that he died because of me? The kid that trusted me the most. The kid that came to me when he needed help. The kid who I was able to convince to keep going because he had so much life ahead of him. Now here he is life cut way too short because of my slip up.

I heard the guy behind me that I choked out start to regain consciousness. If I’m going to die I’ll make sure this fucker dies with me. There’s no way in hell I will let Reiner killers live. The girl is already dead but this fucker this fucker is next.

Before I could stand up or even turn around and face him I felt a hand on my arm as I was pulled to my feet. The next thing I knew I was dragged through a portal and back at camp. The portal closed and I watched as that fuckers head hit the floor with a thud. He got off easy if I had my way he would have had a slow and painful death.

“Where’s Reiner.” The question shocked me back to my senses. That’s Berthold’s voice. How am I supposed to tell him that it’s my fault that Reiner died? How am I supposed to face him? Why did Pixis bring me back? I was more than happy to die right there next to him.

“What happened?” I heard Annie ask and I just lowered my head.

“Reiner died because I slipped up. It’s all my fault.”


	97. The Ring

“You’re lying,” I forced out. “He’s alive,” I said trying to convince myself. He was just here, he was fine. I tried to come up with a million different ways that he could still be alive but the truth was staring me in the face. They came back and he didn’t/ The amount of blood on Pixis’s hands it was obvious that something did happen.

“It was supposed to be an easy mission,” I mumbled mostly to myself trying to figure out where it all went wrong. I felt my legs wobble under me and I let my knees hit the floor. My brain was trying to process everything all at once to the point where it just stopped processing everything all together.

“What?” Pixis asked quickly and I looked up at him to see what the problem was, “Is that what he told you?” he asked.

“He told us both that,” Annie spoke up behind me. Pixis just closed his eyes before lowering and shaking his head.

“What? What aren’t you telling us?”

“The mission was suspected to be a trap. It wasn’t an easy mission in the slightest. Shadis was supposed to be the only one on it but Reiner insisted he needed some backup and volunteered.”

“No you're wrong he told me-.” I let my voice fade out as I thought about the way he said it. The way he was acting the number of times he told me he loved me before he left. The promise he made me. He knew. That son of a bitch knew and didn’t tell me. “Damn him,” I closed my eyes and clenched my teeth.

I felt as Annie put her hand on my back before sitting down next to me. A part of me wanted to push her away and tell her that I just wanted to be alone, but another part of me wanted to cling to her and not let go. I know I shouldn’t be alone right now but I can’t help partly feeling like I should be.

I wanted to be mad at Pixis and Shadis for letting him go on that stupid mission, but I couldn’t I knew he would have gone anyway. I needed someone to blame but the only person I could think of was myself for not catching on sooner.

“The person who killed him?” I said looking to Shadis, “Did you make them pay?” I asked.

“There were two of them. I killed the girl, but the guy well, that's his head,” he said pointing to the head and arm that was sitting a few feet away from us.

I just stared at it wishing I was the one who ripped it off. Before I could even think I was already on my feet and without any hesitation or a second thought I kicked the head as hard as I could before falling back to my knees. I couldn’t tell if the pain in my chest was from my wound ripping open or from the pain of losing Reiner.

The room remained deadly silent for way too long and all I wanted to do was go to bed. “Annie?” I called and she walked up next to me. “Can you help me back to bed?” I asked not even knowing if I could walk by myself without my legs giving out.

“Okay,” she said reaching her hand out for mine. Instantly I felt my legs start to wobble and she put my arm around her to help stabilize me. “I’m going to tell Mikasa that I’ll stay with you tonight,” she offered.

“You don’t need to,” I mumbled.

“I know. I want to.” I didn’t say anything back. If she wanted to stay with me then I’m not going to say no. The more I think about staying in our bed alone the more tears I feel sting my eyes.

“Franz please go see Ms. Magnolia,” Pixis said knowing that Franz must be pretty traumatized realizing he just beheaded a man. Once Franz was out of the room he walked over to where I was sitting on the floor and reached his hand out to me. “Are you hurt?”

“No,” I said, completely forgetting at one point I had gotten stabbed. I was too numb to everything to feel any pain.

“You’re bleeding,” he raised an eyebrow. I looked down at the huge gash on my arm.

“Oh,” I mumbled. I tried desperately to hold back what I wanted to say but I just couldn’t anymore.

“Why didn’t you just leave me there. I was more than happy to die right there next to him. He died because of me so why do I have to come back when he can’t?” I wanted to scream at him and force him to send me back there, but I could barely force out a whisper.

“Two pointless deaths don’t cancel each other out. You dying too would only make things worse.”

“How?”

“Well, you were at least around to hear his final words right? Did he tell you anything for Berthold or did it happen too quickly?”

I remembered the ring he handed me that I had put in my pocket. That’s right if I would have died I wouldn’t be able to give Berthold the ring. Reiner’s dying wish was to give him the ring and tell him he’s had it since school. I can’t die yet I have a mission to complete. I stood to my feet and was about to head to Berthold’s room when Pixis stopped me.

“You should wash the blood off first,” he said and I nodded. Probably not a good thing to traumatize them anymore. Speaking of where did the head end up after Berthold kicked it.

I looked around and Pixis’s eyes followed mine. “Don’t worry about that, I'll take care of it.”

“And what do you mean by that?” I asked, wondering what on earth he planned to do with a severed head and a severed arm.

I watched as he made force fields around them to pick them up “I’ll figure out something.”

I headed to the bathroom to clean off my hands and wash my own wound that was still bleeding. I just used some of the spare bandages and wrapped up my arm deciding I would deal with it later. I made sure to stop by my room to change out of the bloody clothes I was wearing and throw on some clean ones. Once I was sure I got all of the blood off of me I headed to Berthold’s room. I made it to the door and froze.

I was probably the last person he wanted to see right now. He probably blames me. Maybe I could have Pixis give it to him. “Shadis is that you?” I heard Berthold’s voice say just beyond the curtain blocking the door.

“Yes,” I forced out.

“Please come in,” he said. His voice sounded exhausted but he didn’t sound angry. I could tell by how it sounded he was forcing back tears. I walked in and Annie instantly excused herself to give us privacy. I was sure she was just going to wait in the hall.

“Before he-” He paused for a moment, “he died, he said something didn’t he?” he asked looking up at me.

“He did,” I nodded. I didn’t want to walk over to him in case he wanted me to just tell him and get out. I still wasn’t sure if he was mad at me or not. Berthold was never one to share his emotions so I really couldn’t tell what he was feeling.

He patted the side of his bed gesturing for me to come closer so we could talk. I hesitantly walked over and sat next to him. He let out a chuckle and I looked up at him confused. He just smiled at me with tears in his eyes. “I’ve never seen you show so many emotions before. I didn’t even think you had any to be honest. Sorry, that probably sounds rude,” he said before lowering his head, “it’s just. Reiner always talked about how you were his favorite person to go to and I never understood why. Now I think I get it.” He nodded.

I froze for a moment. I never knew that. I was his favorite person to go to out of all the other adults? Why? There wasn’t anything special about me.

“You know he told me what you did for him, back before we got together,” he said looking down twirling a ring on his finger that seemed to be made of plastic. Oh, that reminds me I need to give him the ring, “he told me how you saved his life back then.”

“I did.” I nodded. “Before I noticed Levi in the field at night I used to patrol the cliff's edge and try and stop anyone from jumping.

“Because of you I was able to spend these years with him,” he said before wrapping his arms around me, “thank you for giving me these years with him. How can he thank me? It's because of me that Reiner died. “I’m sure he’s happy that he could repay the favor,” Berthold said. It made me think back to that earlier. He jumped in front of me. He took the hit for me. He saved me.

“How did you-?”

“Oh please, it’s Reiner I know how he is. The reason he probably joined the reckless mission, to begin with, was to make sure you didn’t die on it. He was probably hell-bent on protecting you on it too. I’m sure the whole reason you’re alive is because he jumped in front of you. I can tell because you also feel guilty and are blaming yourself.”

“I-.”

“Don’t blame yourself okay. It’s not your fault. Reiner was always reckless, and I know he’s probably happy knowing that he saved you at least. He would think of it as repaying a debt,” Berthold let out a forced laugh before looking to the ground.

I didn’t know what to say. I never asked him to jump in front of me. I never wanted him to feel like he owed me anything. I saved him because the world was better with him in it and here he went and got himself killed on my behalf. What makes him think I wanted that?

I just shook my head and held out the ring to Berthold. His eyes looked at the ring and then back up at me with a confused look. “It’s from Reiner. He said he had it since you guys were at the school but never found the right time to give it to you.”

I watched as Berthold dropped his head back down letting the tears fall. He didn’t even bother fighting them anymore. “He was planning on giving it to me when he got back wasn’t he?” he asked. “He told me that after this was all over he was going to give me a real one but instead handing me the plastic one.” He looked down at his hand and pointed at the plastic ring he had been messing with.

“I think he didn’t want to give it to you before because he wanted the motivation of giving it to you in person to get him through the mission.”

“Sounds like something he would do,” he laughed through his tears and I handed him the ring. I watched as he held it before clenching it in his hand and hugging it to his chest.

“He also told me to tell you that he loves you and that he’s sorry he broke his promise,” I said not even knowing what promise he was referencing and I watched as he broke down even more.

“He’s an asshole,” Berthold said through his tears and clenched teeth, “he promised he would come back to me.”

“Oh,” I mumbled. He just sat there holding the ring to his chest and sobbing. I didn’t know what to do aside from wrapping my arms around him and rubbing his back. I tried my damnedest to fight back my own tears but hearing him break down I couldn’t anymore. I silently let my tears out as I tried to comfort him.

“I miss him, I miss that asshole so much,” he said and I saw Annie appear back in the doorway. She nodded at me before walking up and putting her hand on his back as she started to help comfort him.

“I can take care of him, You should get your arm checked out it’s bleeding really badly,” she said dismissing me. I just looked at the bandages that blood already started to seep through. I stood to leave and Berthold grabbed my arm.

“Please don’t blame yourself,” he said one last time, “you helped kill the monsters that took him away so for that I’m grateful.” He let go of my arm and Annie told him she would walk me out of the room.

She walked me into the hallway before asking me how he died. “He was stabbed a few times,” I mumbled.

“Thank you for taking care of him,” I said to her and she nodded.

“Reiner’s last request to me was to watch over him. I’m sure it’s because he knew he might not come back.”

“I guess he was the only one that knew because I surely didn’t,” I said letting out a sigh as I turned back around. I went to go find Pixis so he could take a look at my arm. I was also curious what he ended up doing with the head and arm.

I found him in his office. He had his head on his desk and was silently sobbing. I knocked on the door to let him know I was there. He looked up and quickly wiped at his eyes. “Sorry, come in,” he said trying to clean himself up.

“So what happened to the body parts?” I asked.

“I told Franz to close his eyes and open a portal back to the mission and he did. I threw them through and had him close it.”

“I see,” I mumbled before plopping down in the chair across from him.

“Your arm!” he said jumping up after seeing how badly it was bleeding.

“I don’t care about my arm.”

“But I do,” he said getting up and walking over to me. He started applying pressure to my arm and I could tell I was getting light-headed but I didn’t care. “We need to get you to Hanji.”

“Then what?” I asked, “what are we supposed to tell her? What are we supposed to tell everyone? No one else even knew there was a mission how are we supposed to tell them that not only we went on a mission but Reiner fucking died on it.”

Pixis just froze. I don’t think he thought about that yet. “We will figure something out in the morning. Right now everyone needs their sleep.”

“They are going to be pissed if you do that.”

“Then so be it. I would rather them be pissed at me than tell them now and no one sleeps all night when they all need their rest to heal.”

“What do we tell Hanji?” I asked.

“That we will explain in the morning,” he insisted.

“You know she won’t stand for it.”

“She’ll have to.”


	98. The Last Straw

Pixis grabbed me by my good arm and dragged me all the way to Hanji’s room. I didn’t want because I knew the second she took a look at me she would know something's off. Hell, the second she looked at either of us. Our eyes were red from crying, we looked like hell and I was bleeding pretty badly. What was Pixis planning on telling her? If he thinks he can tell her to wait until morning to figure out what happened he is sadly mistaken.

I mean no to mention that others probably already know by now. Franz went to Ms. Magnolia and probably told her what happened. I wouldn’t be surprised if Annie told Mikasa what happened, lord knows who else could have been told by now.

We walked straight in to see Hanji and Molbit talking. “Sorry to interrupt. I know you are still resting but we have a bit of an emergency,” Pixis said looking at Hanji with desperate eyes.

“What’s wrong. Oh my god!” She jumped to her feet seeing my arm which had already almost bleed completely through the bandages I had wrapped it in. “What on earth happened?” she asked before laying her hands on my arm.

“You don’t have to heal it all the way just please stop the bleeding,” Pixis begged.

“Done,” she nodded, taking her hands off my arm and unwrapping the bandages looking at the huge gash in my arm. “Now is someone going to tell me what happened?” She asked and my eyes hit the floor.

“We will be calling a family meeting in the morning to talk about it. Please don’t worry about it,” Pixis said and I could already hear her preparing to go off on him. She took a deep inhale but was cut off by Molbit.

“No, no, no, no, no.” He said desperately looking between the two of us. “Tell me I’m wrong.” He whispered but when neither of us answered he said it again. “Tell me I’m wrong!” He raised his voice.

“Molbit can we talk outside,” Pixis said trying to keep his cool. He was stronger than I was. Hearing Molbit cry out like that silent tears rolled down my cheeks as I desperately tried to hold it together.

“What are you all hiding?” Hanji asked, looking between all of us.

“It’s my fault. It’s all my fault. I knew the intel was bad. I knew it was a trap. I should have just ignored it, I shouldn’t have said anything.” Molbit said, covering his ears and squatting down. 

Hanji dropped down next to him putting a hand on his shoulder trying to comfort him, but also still trying to figure out what was happening. 

I looked up at Pixis who was fighting back tears of his own at the moment. “We need to call the meeting tonight,” I said and he didn’t even try and argue with me.

“I will have to fill in Mina and Erwin when they wake up,” He nodded. “Have everyone meet in the common room.

“We aren’t doing this in the-.”  
“No, they need to be close to their rooms. No one is going to want to go very far after hearing the news and the injured aren’t going to make the stairs without help.

“What news?” Hanji asked, looking at us, her heart sinking the more we talked. She could tell whatever was coming was bad.

Molbit looked up at us, his eyes begging us to tell him he was imagining the whole thing. I just forced my eyes back to the ground and told them both we would brief them in the common area.

I helped grab the rest of the people. I told Berthold and Annie they could sit this one out but Berthold shook his head and insisted on coming with me. “I have my own message to everyone,” he said, his voice chillingly calm.

We got everyone sitting around before Pixis, Molbit, Berthold, Franz, and myself stood at the front. “We called you all here to discuss something very important,” Pixis said addressing everyone.

My heart broke a little when I saw Ymir, Christa, and Eren looking around realizing we were short a person. They were looking for Reiner. I made the mistake of making eye contact with Levi and my heart shattered the rest of the way. He knew. 

He stared into my eyes before closing his tightly and letting his head drop. I watched as he bit at his lip to stop himself from showing any emotion. His eyes opened back up and instantly looked at Eren who was still looking around the room. I watched as he wrapped his arms around him before letting his eyes close again. Eren looked so confused. I had to rip my eyes away to stop myself from breaking down.

“About an hour ago two people went out on a mission that they expected was a trap. They went to check it out anyway. They thought they were in the clear when they were ambushed. Only one person returned home.”

Instantly the room fell silent, the whispering stopped and everyone's eyes darted around the room as they looked for who was missing. The people who already realized let their heads fall. “Reiner was killed on the mission,” Pixis finished forcing the words out.

Most people let their eyes drop to the floor some looked up at Berthold but everyone was silent.

I felt like I had to speak up like I had to let them know the killers are dead, but I thought it was best not to bring it up and retraumatize Franz with the memory of him killing someone.

“I have a few things that I wanted to say,” Berthold said and all eyes were on him. “The people who killed Reiner are both dead.” Well, guess we don’t have much of a choice now since Berthold brought it up. “These people killed Reiner, they killed Ilsa. They have no problem killing any of us, so I’ve decided I have no problem killing any of them. Whether I’m alone in that fact even if I have to leave the group I’m sticking by that and anyone who is with me is welcome to join.” He said and before I could put a stop to any of this Pixis did it for me.

“Hey wait wait wait. No one is leaving the group. Let’s think rationally about this-.”

“I am. An eye for an eye. That’s about as rational as it gets.”

“An eye for an eye makes the whole world go blind,” Pixis said, putting his hand on Berthold’s shoulder. “I know you’re angry. I know you must want revenge. We all do, but-.”

“No buts. That’s it. I am angry and I want revenge.”

“That’s not going to make you happy. It’s not going to bring him back.” Pixis tried to tell him.

“I don’t care. This isn’t about bringing him back, this isn't’ about my happiness. This is about fighting. This is a war. Why should only one side suffer casualties?”

Pixis looked at me for help. Wrong move. I’m with Berthold on this one. I mean did he forget that I’m the one who killed first here. Berthold looked at me seeing where I stand seeing if I would side with him or with Pixis. All eyes were on the three of us. I knew I had to choose and I had to make my decision known to everyone in the room. 

“Sorry Pixis,” I said shaking my head and scooting closer to Berthold. “ I already have blood on my hands. I’m the one who killed first.”

Pixis looked around to see who else was thinking about agreeing with us. Franz came up and stood with us, “I mean I already killed someone even if it was on accident. Knowing that it was the man that killed Reiner I don’t even feel guilty about it.”

I looked around the room and saw as people slowly made their decision. Petra walked up to where Pixis stood. “Killing isn’t the answer. I know that it might seem like a good idea right now, but that’s just because we are letting our emotions decide things.”

It seemed like this had become a matter of majority rules whichever side had the most people would be the route we took. Because no matter how much we disagree we aren’t splitting up.

I watched as people went to either side stating their reasoning behind their choice. “I don’t want to become like the monsters we are fighting,” Hanna said joining Pixis’s side.

“I already have blood on my hands at least this time it would be for a good cause,” Annie said, stepping forward and putting her hand on Berthold’s shoulder letting him know she was with him.

“I don’t mind getting my hands dirty. I've done it before as well,” Rico said joining us.  
Hitch and Marlowe both went to stand behind Pixis, “We’ve seen enough bloodshed adding to it isn’t going to make it better,” they both said.

So far we were pretty even and we had people still debating about it. I watched as Eren and jean both looked at each other and then nodded before walking up to our side. “I’ve had enough running. Watching Ilsa die while we weren’t able to do anything I won’t ever let that happen again.” Eren said before Jean started talking.

“I’m tired of watching my friends die and not doing anything about it,” Jean said, helping Eren stay up straight.  
Thomas was about to walk over behind Pixis when Marco asked for some help. Thomas helped him over to Pixis’s side as he was careful with his leg.

“I don’t think I’m capable of killing another human,” Thomas said before looking at Marco for his reason.

“I don’t think I could if I wanted to. All life is special and I can’t justify ending one,” He said. I watched as Jean and Marco looked at each other from the opposing sides. Neither of them wanted to stand without the other but I knew neither of them were budging with their views.

Eld, Mike, and Auruo seemed to make up their mind as they all joined Pixis. All of their responses were the same as before. They didn’t think they could or they didn’t think it was the right choice of action.

We were outnumbered now and everyone else seemed to be on the fence. I watched as Hanji made up her mind and stood up. She looked at my side and I thought she was going to join us before she said, “My whole power is about healing, even though I’m angry right now and I don’t doubt that I could kill. I just don’t want to. I don’t want to become like them.” She walked over to Pixis and stood behind him with her head lowered. I could tell she was conflicted about her choice but I don’t think it was enough to make her budge. 

Sasha and Connie were the next to make their decisions. They both headed to Pixis’s side with their head lowered. “I don’t think I would have it in me to be able to.” They both said.

I thought we were finished until Ymir and Christa stood up. They walked over to our side and nodded. “It’s time we fight back. If that means we have to kill then so be it,” Christa said closing her eyes.

“If our freedom is worth dying for then it’s worth fighting for by any means,” Ymir said standing her ground.

I looked around and saw there weren’t many people left. There were still two that couldn’t vote Erwin and Mina would have to decide later on, but if more people go to Pixis’s side then they might not have to, we might be outnumbered anyway.

Armin stood up and I watched as he walked in between us making his last-minute decision before backing up and standing by Pixis. “I’m sorry, I see how both sides are right, but I just can’t bring myself to actually be able to take a life.”

Mikasa stood up and looked at both sides before silently walking over behind me. When everyone looked at her she just shrugged, “I’m not going to try and kill people but if it happens it happens I will do what I can to protect my friends.”

Nanaba and Hannes walked over to our side before standing next to Rico. “I will do what I have to to protect my friends,” Nanaba said before looking towards Rico and the rest of her group members, “to protect my family.”

“I’m not going to stand by while they are killing us, I want to do what I can even if it means killing,” Hannes said with an anxious nod.

We were down to the final three. Molbit, Ms. Magnolia, and Levi.   
For our side to have the most we would need all three of them to agree. And that’s without Erwin and Mina’s votes.

I watched as Molbit frantically looked between the two sides. He seemed just as unsure when he walked up. He walked to our side and let out a deep breath. “I owe this to Berthold to be on his side. It’s my intel that got Reiner killed.” He mumbled before lowering his head.

I looked at the last two. I wouldn’t blame them no matter what they chose but a part of me felt anxious about this whole thing. I mean we were voting against people's lives here. To kill or not to kill was a big deal and we were making everyone choose on the spot.

Ms. Magnolia let out a big sigh before walking over to our side. “I would be a hypocrite if I went to the other side because I know damn well if I see anyone get killed in front of me I would probably try and kill whoever did it.” She said before walking over to where Eren was and helping Jean hold him up.  
We all looked at Levi who stayed sitting. He finally stood up, “and then there was one,” he said looking at both sides. “So far it seems my vote is the deciding factor until Mina and Erwin wake up,” he pointed out. He crossed his arms and let out a sigh.

“I never wanted anyone to die, I wanted to prevent people from dying for so long. I can’t even begin to describe how many nights I stayed awake blaming myself for deaths that weren’t actually my fault. However, if I go through with this then there will be actual blood on my hands. I will become the one thing I wanted to prevent the most.” he said looking at Pixis’s side. By how he was talking I was sure he was going to join him, but he continued on.

“However, on the other hand, I think that if it came down to either me watching someone else die or killing someone then I think,” he said walking over to our side, “I would rather have their blood on my hands than watch another damn person I care about die in front of me. Now I’m not saying I’m down to kill at random I and I’m sure most of us over here are only thinking about it as a worst-case scenario?” he asked.

I mean I can’t speak for anyone else, but I know when I killed that woman it wasn’t because I had to, it was because I wanted to. I wanted to make her pay for killing Reiner. Most people seemed to agree with Levi, but Berthold and I stayed quiet. We seemed to be out-matched with that one, but it seems until Erwin and Mina cast their votes our side had the majority even if it was by one vote.

“We will see what the other two have to say later, but no matter what it comes to we need to come to an agreement somewhere in the middle,” Pixis said before taking a deep breath, “that being said we don’t have to do that tonight, I know that it might be hard but please everyone try and get some rest.” he dismissed everyone knowing damn well that they weren’t going to be able to get any rest. None of us would tonight.


	99. Questioning Morals

Eren, Jean, and Marco started heading back to our room when I dismissed myself. “I’ll be back in a minute. I have something to take care of,” I said before waiting for Ymir to start heading back to her room. I waited as the room cleared out. When there were only a few people left, Ymir and Christa decided to start heading back. When she started walking I grabbed her arm and dragged her away from Christa who looked very confused about everything.

“I’ll be back in a second,” Ymir said, trying to ease Christa’s worries.

I threw Ymir up against the wall a little harder than I meant to. I looked her in the eyes making sure she knew I wasn’t playing around, “Is Reiner around?”

“You know I can’t-.”

“Bullshit!” I yelled, “don’t you dare give me that.” I know why she’s doing this but she doesn’t need to pull this stunt with me. I want to be able to help her with her own grief since she never gets her own time to grieve. On top of that, I want to know Reiner’s opinions on everything that’s happening. Berthold is doing this in his name and we don’t even know if he is okay with killing. Even if he’s okay with us killing, maybe he’s not okay with Berthold’s reasonings.

I want him to talk some sense into Berthold to make him see reason. Even if he can’t change his mind then to at least make sure he gives him a better reason than pure revenge. I can see why they would vote to allow killing but at the same time having your reason be only revenge isn’t going to solve anything.

I honestly don’t know what I want. Maybe to have closure? Maybe to just be able to say goodbye. I mean I know we never fully got along but I still thought of him as a close friend. We may have butted heads but we were still friends nonetheless. If not friends then family.

I watched as she opened her mouth trying to find something to say before she finally let out a sigh, “not yet.”

“You tell me when he appears to you.” I wanted to keep my voice flat and calm but it came out more begging than anything.

“You mean if. It’s not a guarantee that they will. Especially since Reiner was mad at me. He might have carried that anger over. Sometimes when spirits wake up they will remember emotions but not why they feel them so he could feel that anger and never want to talk to me again.”

I paused for a moment trying to remember why he was mad at her. That’s right Ymir let it slip that Ilsa was around and he almost lost it on her, that was before everyone got shot. They never had time to really talk about everything after that. He never got closure. “But you will see him if he’s around Berthold right?”

She put her hand on my shoulder and I realized I was still pinning her to the wall. My grip on her arms were tight and I didn’t even realize it before. I quickly let her go and let out a quiet apology. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“You didn’t hurt me,” I could tell she was lying cause her arms were sore. “Not if he doesn’t want to be seen.”

“Your power is so frustrating,” I sighed. Letting my hands fall to my side and gripping at my pants. I didn’t want to hurt anyone and the fact that I did it without even realizing.

“You're telling me,” she laughed. “But if I see him I’ll try and let you know,” she said giving in.

“Good because I want to know if I just made the biggest mistake of my life by agreeing to kill people if need be.”

“I never thought you would be the one to worry about that sort of thing,” she mumbled mostly to herself. “I wouldn’t worry about it too much. Besides Erwin and Mina still have to cast their votes who knows they might not agree with us, and even if they do, as you said earlier I doubt we are going to be killing everyone we will probably only do it when we have to.”

Still, even so, that’s what I’m worried about. When do we count killing as a necessity? After someone dies? If it looks like someone might die? If we get surrounded? Are we going to start killing just if we get spotted on a mission to keep others from being alerted? Where does necessity stop being a necessity and start being because we can?

“Right,” I mumbled, not knowing how to phrase my concerns. I just turned around and started heading back towards my room. I didn’t have enough energy to do this tonight. I had to stop myself from breaking down thinking about how it’s happening again. The people I care about are dying. I can’t lose anyone else. How many more people am I going to lose? How many more of my friends are going to die?

How much blood will be on my hands after tonight? I could have casted my vote against the bloodshed, if my vote is the deciding factor then that would make all of the people who we kill my fault. Their blood will be on my hands. I could have voted to stop this madness, but I voted for it.

Voting on the spot was the worst thing we could have done. We all needed time to think time to clear our heads. They can’t just tell us “hey Reiner died, now vote if you want to kill people.” I wonder how many people voted for the sake of revenge. How many voted because they let their emotions cloud their judgment. We needed to maybe bring up the topic but save it for a later date to actually vote and discuss.

I didn’t even make it to my room. My legs were shaking too much and it was getting too hard to breath. Everything weighed me down right there in the hallway. The weight of my vote and all the blood that would follow. The news about Reiner. The fact that I hurt Ymir. I just backed into the wall before sliding down and pulling my knees close to my chest as I sat there on the floor trying to hold it all together. I didn’t want to break down here but I definitely didn’t want to do it in front of the others.

They all seemed so sure about their choices. Eren and Jean made up their minds to kill pretty quickly. Marco made up his mind that he couldn’t kill. They were all dead set on their choices. None of them would budge at the simplest suggestion. But here I am unsure if I made the right choice. I was on the fence and I picked a side without wanting to. I was unsure and had so many eyes on me that I just went with the side that seemed to make the most sense in that second. The more I think about it though the less it makes sense. We needed to discuss the boundaries more because I might have just signed up for my worst nightmare ever.

“Oh hun,” I heard mom’s voice say as she sat down next to me.

I wanted to look up at her, but I physically couldn’t. How could I face her? Even she was sure of her choice. How was I supposed to tell her that not only was I not sure but I’m having second thoughts?

On top of that, I hurt Ymir. I pinned her to the wall and held her arms so tight it probably will leave bruises. She might have brushed them off but I know I hurt her. I know she was scared of me even if it was just for a second even if she never showed it I felt it. The biggest thing of all… I didn’t even care. Not right away. A part of me was even happy that she was scared of me because it meant she might tell me the truth without me having to work hard for it. How fucked up is that? How am I supposed to explain any of this to mom?

“Do you want to talk about it?” She asked and all I could do was shake my head. “That’s okay. I know the last few days have been really hard and losing Reiner probably hurts, but we don’t have to talk about any of that okay, I just want to check in and see how you are feeling about the vote. I know that you must be struggling with your choice.”

I felt my head shoot up as I looked her in the eyes. “How?” is all I could bring myself to say. How on earth did she know that?

“Sweetheart, I know you. You’ve always been the person to want to help. You’ve always wanted to make sure everyone is safe and in a good place even at the extent of yourself sometimes. I expected you to vote against killing and when you didn’t I knew you probably didn’t want to pick either side right?”

I just nodded. Why did there have to be sides to start? Why did we have to go into a majority rules instead of just sitting down and discussing our options and coming to a compromise?

“The more I weigh my options the more I question why I choose it,” I whispered.

“I understand that. I wasn’t fully behind killing either, but I knew that I would be a hypocrite to vote against it. I would kill for any of you kids and you all know that so if I said I was against it everyone would call me on my bullshit, but just because I would, doesn’t mean it’s something I want to do if there is actually a choice.”

“I mean I understand both sides but when does it stop. If both sides are killing what stops us from being like them? Who are the real monsters when both sides act the same?”

“It’s less about monsters and more about point of view,” Mom mumbled. “I mean we don’t exactly know what’s going on in their heads to make them do what they do, not that I really care one way or another. If they hurt my babies then I don’t care what goes through their head they are still hurting my children.”

“But couldn’t they argue the same?” I asked, “I mean in their eyes that’s the same thing that will happen if we start killing them. We will always be killing someone’s baby, someone's son, someone's daughter, their spouse, their friend. So what makes them different from them?”

She paused for a moment to think about it before finally looking up at me, “I guess the real difference between us is they started killing us almost instantly. Whereas we held out for years without killing them even losing two people before finally deciding enough is enough. That is the difference.”

I just sat back and sighed, that’s not much of a difference in the long run. I mean sure they came out shooting from nearly the start, however, they are soldiers it’s quite literally their job. I mean I’m not trying to defend them in any way, I’m just trying to understand. I mean we don’t know why they do what they do. Whether they are just following orders, or if they have their own motivations. From the thoughts I’ve heard most seem to enjoy their job, others seem indifferent, but none of them have any trouble with pulling the trigger.

Again that could just be because they are soldiers, but that doesn’t explain the fact that none of them see us as humans. We are nothing more than a pest that must be exterminated. I used to think it was just a few of them that see us like that but after our last mission and hearing all the same thoughts in these new people it’s feeling less and less like a coincidence.

I mean we know the government has lied about us and made a whole bunch of false propaganda, but how many lies have they told? What are they telling these people to have them dehumanize us, hell to even demonize us?

“Do you think Auruo and Molbit will be up to talk tomorrow? I have a few questions I want to ask them.” I finally blurted out.

“I’m sure they will be okay to talk.”

“Okay thank you,” I mumbled. I just sat back fully calmed down with a new goal in mind. Figure out what the hell kinda propaganda they are brainwashing people with. If they are telling something to their soldiers that is so bad it strips humanity away from us to make us easier to kill. I wonder what type of fear-mongering they are doing to just ordinary people?


	100. Pinky Promise

Mom and I sat there for a little while longer until Jean came looking for me telling me that Eren was threatening to come look for me himself. I thanked mom for talking with me before walking back to my room with Jean.

Walking into the room I expected tears and sobs, but instead, I walked into a somber and quiet room. Marco and Eren were just staring off into space. Jean even looked out of it. No one seemed to be breaking down just yet, but I could tell they were all just shoving their emotions aside. It’s not that they weren’t sad, it's just that they were still trying to process everything that had happened today. I can’t really blame them it was a lot to take in all at once,

“We should get some sleep,” I suggested. No one argued everyone just crawled into bed and silently agreed. It felt weird that there were no protests about my suggestion, but I didn’t question it. I just climbed into bed and pulled Eren close to me before closing my eyes.

Everyone's thoughts were pretty much the same including mine. If I wake up tomorrow maybe all of this will just go away maybe this is just a horrible nightmare. We all knew it was reality but we couldn’t stop ourselves from begging whatever higher beings to make it all go away.

I knew what I had to do in the morning. I had to track down Molbit and Auruo and get information about what they are saying about us. Things aren’t adding up. How can anyone look at another person and see them as less than human to the point where they have no trouble killing them… hell even take pleasure in it. Not just anyone, but multiple people, countless people are believing whatever they are telling them. Even ordinary people who aren’t exactly killing us but don’t even bat an eye when we get killed in front of them. How can people be this cruel without reason? There has to be a reason and I’m going to find out what it is.

I don’t know why I’m so hellbent on finding out what they are saying about us. I doubt knowing will even change anything but it doesn’t matter. I need to figure out what makes people throw aside their morals and kill without mercy. I need to figure it out before our side ends up doing the same thing. Whether we like it or not they are still people too. People with friends and families.

Killing is wrong no matter which side is doing it, but I would be a hypocrite to say that I haven’t thought about it. I mean who am I fooling when Ilsa was killed I wanted nothing more than to go back and make that bastard pay. When Eren was shot it took everything I had not to kill them right then and there.

I just shoved the rest of my thoughts out of my head. I needed to get my rest sitting here debating myself in my head about if my choice was right or wrong isn’t going to help. What I need is answers, after I get those answers then maybe just maybe this debate might be easier.

I let my body relax and let sleep come over me but not before pulling Eren just a little closer to me. Pixis is right, no matter what happens, no matter what is decided we are all staying together.

The morning came quicker than I thought. I knew it was only a few hours away when we laid down, but when it was time to get up it was still a hard task. I sat up seeing everyone still sleeping. I had to force myself to get out of bed. Sadly when I woke up I remembered everything and that it wasn’t just a nightmare. I quietly got dressed and headed out of the room to hunt down Auruo and Molbit to see if they had the answers to my questions.

On the way I bumped into mom who had told me that both Mina and Erwin had woken up. “Has anyone told them yet?”

I asked and her face dropped. “We told Mina, but not Erwin. He’s still very weak and we don’t want to stress him out. Hanji said stress wouldn’t be good for him right now.”

I just nodded and thanked her for telling me before heading to find Auruo and Molbit. I found Auruo with Petra in the common area. They were both silently staring at the food on their plate that remained untouched. When I realized they would be there for a while I went to look for Molbit. I found him sitting in the corner of his room with his head in his hands. He looked like he was really struggling. I didn’t know if I should even ask him the questions anymore all I knew was I needed to get him out of this mindset. He’s blaming himself.

I just walked in and sat down beside him. He didn’t even notice I was there for the first few minutes. I didn’t know how to snap him out of it without startling him. I just sat there and listened to his spiraling thoughts hoping I would be able to help if I knew more about what he was going through.

He also seemed conflicted with his vote since he only voted on the side of killing because he thought he owed Berthold after getting Reiner killed. I finally took a deep breath and reached my hand out for his shoulder. I heard someone else’s thoughts in the doorway and paused. I looked up and saw Rico standing there; she just shook her head and thought to me, I’ll take care of him.

I just nodded and stood up and headed out the door. I paused turning back and peeking my head in curious about how she was going to go about this. I watched as she walked over and sat next to him before lightly whispering his name, “hey Molbit.”

“Rico?” he asked, picking his head up and wiping his tears away.

“It happened, my worst-case scenario came true and it’s all my fault,” he blurted out.

“Hey it’s not your fault, listen, I know you might feel that way because you gave them the information, but from what I heard you told them everything was a trap from the start. They knew what they were walking into. From what I heard from Berthold, Reiner knew he wasn’t coming back. None of it is your fault okay.”

Wow, she’s pretty good at that. I walked away letting them have their privacy as I went back to find Auruo. Hopefully, he will have the answers I need. I don’t think Molbit is in any place to help me. He needs to worry about his grief and healing process before helping me with my stupid requests.

I walked back to where Auruo was sitting and asked if I could talk to him alone for a little while. He looked happy to finally have a distraction from his thoughts as he walked me to his office. We took a seat and he wasted no time asking me what was on my mind.”

“Well, after the discussion last night I started thinking,” I said and I watched as fear flashed across his face. His thoughts going back to the voting and the outcome.

“Oh,” he mumbled not knowing where this conversation was heading. He was trying not to let his thoughts show but one of the ones I managed to hear was that he was afraid that I was going to try and convince him to change his vote.

“I mean, after thinking about it I can see both sides of the argument,” I said continuing on hoping to ease some of his worries as I went. “The more I think about it the fewer things make sense though. I mean how can they just kill us without any hesitation or remorse. I mean I could understand if it was just a few outliers, but with as many people’s minds that I’ve read on missions they are the majority.”

He looked less worried and more confused about where I was going with this. “What do you mean?” he asked trying to figure out exactly where I was going with this topic.

“Well, I was wondering do you know what propaganda they are spreading?”

“Um, I mean at this point it’s what propaganda aren’t they spreading,” he sighed, “If you are looking for more specific examples I can’t really help you. I tend to ignore them and tune them out. Molbit might be able to tell you better than I can,” he suggested.

“Okay thanks anyway,” I said knowing damn well Molbit was out of the question. I left the room and thought that I should just give up now that was until a thought crossed my mind. Everyone thinks Eren is the reckless one in our relationship, but I swear if they heard even half of my ideas then they would definitely change their mind.

“Am I really going to do this?” I asked myself.

“Do what?” I heard a voice behind me ask. Shit.

“Hey Ymir,” I said, letting out a nervous laugh.

“You’re planning on doing something stupid aren’t you?” She called me out right away.

“No, what makes you say that,” I said awkwardly.

“You’re a horrible liar.”

“Okay just a little, don’t tell anyone.”

“Depends on what you are planning on doing,” she said.

“If I tell you you will try and stop me.”

She let out a deep sigh before putting her pinky out to me, “I pinky promise I won’t tell on you, but only if I can join you.”

“You don’t even know what I’m doing?” I asked, a little confused about what she was trying to do.

“Yeah well someone has to make sure you don’t get yourself killed.”

I just stared at her pinky. Is putting her life in danger really worth it. I mean I’m doing this for answers I know what I’m getting myself into. I know damn well that doing this can get me killed, but am I really going to risk someone else's life for answers? Not only that but I’m risking everyone’s life here.

“Hurry up my arms getting tired,” she groaned.

“Fine,” I said hooking our pinkies together. She leaned forward and bit her thumb waiting for me to do the same. I just rolled my eyes and did it. “Happy?” I asked.

“Yes, now tell me what I just signed up for.”

“We are going to sneak out of here and wander around out there until I get the answers I’m looking for,” I asked knowing damn well that this could get us killed. I waited for her to yell at me or back out, but she just let out a sigh.

“Alright, when are we leaving?” she asked.

“Now,” I said and she looked around making sure the hallways were empty. “How do we plan on sneaking out with people watching every entrance? Or did you just forget we have lookouts now?”

“I didn’t forget, I just haven’t planned that far ahead yet,” I mumbled. “Not to mention we have to be extra careful entering and exiting cause if we get spotted leaving or entering this building we could endanger everyone here.”

“Great,” she mumbled. “I forgot about that.”

“Well, you still up for this?” I asked making sure there were no cold feet now.

“A pinky promise is a pinky promise,” she nodded.


	101. Normal

“So what answers are you looking for?” She asked trying to get a little more perspective of the whole situation and why I was ready to risk my life for them.

“well, “ I told her everything. How I wasn’t sure about my vote and why I wasn’t sure. I told her how I had an epiphany that maybe things weren’t as they seemed. That maybe these people were getting brainwashed by fear-mongering propaganda that made it easier to see us as less than human.

I watched as the lightbulb clicked in her brain. “That would make so much sense of why they are able to kill us and lock us up like animals without hesitation,” she mumbled.

“I want to figure out exactly what they are saying and doing to make them have that reaction. Maybe the information will help us and maybe it won’t but I need to know.”

“No. I think you’re onto something. If we know what they are saying it could help us. I mean we could probably find some use for that information right?”

“Hopefully.” I mean that’s the goal is to be able to use the information to help us, but even if it can’t then it still just might bring me closure. It might finally help me decide.

We went back to our rooms and grabbed plain clothes that would help us blend in as much as possible leaving behind all of our gear. The last thing we need is a guard spotting a knife on us. We made sure to stick to darker clothing but kept it to something you would see any ordinary person wearing. Everyone was still asleep in my room, but Christa woke up when Ymir walked in.

When she asked where she was going I thought she was going to rat me out, but she quickly covered it with ease. “Levi and I are on lookout duty, go back to sleep. I’ll be back in a few hours to keep you warm,” she said softly.

Christa just nodded and laid back down.

“What are you going to do when she realizes you aren’t on lookout duty?” I asked.

“She won’t. She’s not planning on leaving the room today. She said so herself last night she would be in bed all day. Reiner’s death hit her hard. I mean it hit us all hard, but she couldn’t stop crying last night. She’s sick of it, losing people.”

“It surprised me that she would vote for violence let alone killing, she always seemed so timid.”

“I mean before yesterday she probably would have voted against it, but this definitely set her over the edge,” Ymir’s voice came out a low whisper almost as if she was sad to see this change in her, but her thoughts were forced away and her emotions changed before I could read anything else.

We walked to the exit through the old parking garage. I was just praying that it wasn’t Marlowe, Sasha, or Connie on watch today, or else my plan to get out was fucked.

Walking down there I let out a sigh of relief seeing Thomas standing guard. We stood behind one of the obstacles closest to the door to stay out of sight.

“How are we going to get out of here.

“Any spirits around?”

“Just Gabriel,” she mumbled looking around.

Well, I should have figured her Guardian spirit would be around. “I need him to move something,” I said looking around seeing some rubble towards the other side of the room. “Behind there. Make it noisy enough for him to hear but not super loud that it would cause concern.”

“Um okay,” she said with a shrug. A moment later the rubble started to shake slightly. I watched as Thomas turned his head and went to look for the noise behind the crudely built wall.

“Now,” I whispered and ushered Ymir to follow me quickly.

We walked to the exit and I had Ymir ask Gabriel to take a look around before we walked out. He had to make it fast since Thomas would be back any minute.

“It’s clear,” Ymir whispered and we slipped out the door, careful to close it silently behind us.

Once we got out of the building we were quick to get away as fast as possible but keeping it to a pace that looked normal enough. The last thing we wanted was to draw attention to our hideout. We made it farther away from our base before our adrenaline started to calm down and we were able to take a breather and slow our pace.

This all felt strange. It’s a rarity when we get to leave the base, and even when we do it’s always because of a mission or for a food run. We always have a place to be, a time limit, today we don’t. I mean sure we should aim to get back as soon as possible, but who knows when that will be.

I just looked around and took everything in. The sun is shining just behind the clouds, still bright enough to make my eyes sting. The breeze that flowed through my hair and played with the leaves on the floor. The busy sounds of people walking around living their lives. The rumbling of a car’s engine as it passes by us.

Despite all the chaos we have been living in these last few years the world still seems so peaceful. I almost forgot what fresh air felt like living in that dusty old building. It’s weird to see how the world goes on like normal even when it seems like it came crashing down a long time ago.

I guess they aren’t the only ones being brainwashed. Sometimes I forget there are just ordinary people still living their lives like normal even though we are fighting for everything we have. Despite seeing it for myself when we go on food runs I still think of the outside world as a battlefield with debris scattered everywhere guards marching with guns and tanks in the streets as the world looks like an apocalyptic hellscape, but here it is normal as ever. Well, there are still guards around every corner with guns, and shops have signs excluding people, but everything else is fairly normal to how it was years ago.

Either way, we are going to be in deep shit when we get back, or I guess I should say if we get back. They are bound to notice we are missing eventually. I mean when Eren wakes up and can’t find me anywhere eventually they are going to notice Ymir isn’t in the room with Christa.

“We are going to be in deep shit when we get back,” I finally told Ymir, realizing just how much trouble we will be in. “Not only will we be in trouble with Eren and Christa, but also with Pixis, Shadis, and even Mom,” I said letting a shiver of fear run down my spine.

The thought of one of her lectures… no… we would get off easy with a lecture at this point. “She might actually kill us,” I whispered looking up at Ymir.

“Probably, but hey this was your idea,” she said looking at me. I thought at first she was throwing me under the bus, but that’s when I heard her thoughts. Then again I came too for the same reason. It better be worth it to find these answers.

“Alright, so where do we look first?” She asked, realizing we were just walking down a street aimlessly.

“I-I don’t know.” I’ve never felt so lost before. I mean on our missions we always had a designated task, but this… this is so different. We had nothing specific in mind. We had no plan going in and now we are just dead in the water. “This was a bad idea we should just head back before anyone notices we’re gone.” I couldn’t help but get cold feet. What were we supposed to do? I don’t know the slighted thing about gathering this type of information. It’s not like it’s on people's minds at all times, and it’s not like we can walk up to people and ask, Hey how exactly is the government brainwashing you, without drawing the attention of everyone.

“Like hell we are. You said it yourself either way we’re in deep shit when we go back. I’m sure people have already figured out we are gone so we might as well not go back empty-handed. “You might have started this little endeavor, but I’m finishing it. Now are you going to give up at the first hurdle or are you going to power through and keep racing?” She asked looking at me and I just smiled.

“Damn we should have you do all the inspirational pep talks,” I laughed before nodding. “Alright let’s do this.”


	102. Answers

We kept walking while trying to make a plan of how we could get information. Ymir came up with the best idea of speaking sorta loud and saying have you heard what the curses are doing now and see what thoughts pop into people's minds about what we’ve supposedly done before, but even that could be reckless. It draws attention to us as well puts us in a corner if anyone actually asks what they’ve done.

“How about we keep brainstorming and we will consider that our backup plan,” I suggested.

“Okay,” she nodded as we both went back to the mental drawing board. We slowly walked down the sidewalk slowing our paces as we lazily strolled along without a place to be. I’m glad we left in the early morning so we didn’t have to worry about the sun setting for several hours. “We need names,” Ymir finally said.

“Names?”

“Well, if someone stops us we can’t just say our actual names.”

“If someone stops us we might have bigger problems if we can’t show them any identification.”

“Oh.” Her voice came out a whisper as she realized that we were screwed in more ways than one if we were to get stopped.

I just took a deep breath and stopped walking. She turned to look at me stopping in her tracks to see what I was doing. I just leaned up against the wall and closed my eyes letting the sounds of the city swirl around me. It was a shame we didn’t get this freedom more. I opened my eyes upon hearing sirens in the distance. My stomach dropped as they started getting slightly closer. “It’s best if we keep moving,” I whispered.

We saw a sign of hope in the distance. “Well ain't that a sight for sore eyes,” Ymir said letting out a little chuckle. An old newspaper rack that still had some newspapers in it.

“I thought these things went extinct years ago,” She mumbled.

We bought a newspaper and quickly scanned through it before coming across anything that had to do with exiles or the cursed. When we finally spotted an entry it was about how more and more exiles are starting to fight back more and more violently. My eyes went straight towards the middle of the article. “Group of exiles leaves multiple soldiers' heads on wooden stakes as a warning of what is to come.” I read it out before looking at Ymir.

“That sounds like the biggest load of bullshit I’ve ever heard, does it say where this supposedly happened?”

“Nope. it just says they were found just outside of town.” I said scanning over the rest. Something else caught my eye as I looked for the location. “Among below the soldiers’ heads were the mutilated bodies of civilians tied around the stakes,” I read in even more disbelief than before.

“No one is safe,” Ymir said as she started reading the last line of the article, “the exiles must be stopped at any cost.”

We looked up at each other and our eyes locked. She was thinking the same thing as me. This can’t be good. This is just one newspaper and we are already getting such horrendous stories like this. I mean this story is clearly bullshit, but ordinary people aren’t going to see it that way. What else could they possibly be saying about us?

We filled up the newspaper and I slid it into my pocket so we didn’t lose it. It bugged me that it was sticking out of my pocket and digging into my abdomen as I walked, but it couldn’t be helped.

“Where else do we look?” Ymir asked knowing that this wasn’t enough.

“There’s a small drug store over there, do you have any money on you?” I asked.

She checked her pockets before pulling out a few dollars. It must have been from when we last did a grocery run. “Why getting hungry?” she asked.

“No, I don’t know about you, but when I think of fake information that leads to brainwashing I think of magazines. They are bound to have something right?”

“Maybe,” She nodded and we started walking towards the store. I saw some soldiers walk in just before we crossed the street to get to it. I put my hand on her arm and stopped her.

“We bailing?” she asked.

“No, we just have to fit in more,” I said before letting out a frustrated sigh. “Hand me the money,” I said and she did.“ Okay. Just trust me on this one.” Those words alone were enough to make her cringe; we both knew this was going to be unpleasant.

We walked into the store acting like we belonged there. If there was one way to not raise suspicion it’s to not act suspicious. My arm was around Ymir’s waist as we walked her hand lovingly placed on my back. We looked like a normal happy couple on the outside. On the inside, we were both bitching about the situation. Pretending to be normal was bad enough, but pretending to be straight was so much worse.

We walked around a little and grabbed some drinks to make it look like we didn’t come here just for the magazine. We headed to the cash register and got in line just behind the soldiers. One of them was eyeing us. He was debating about talking to us. He didn’t seem fully convinced.

Before he could say anything Ymir put on her best girly voice as she reached the counter where some magazines were lazily placed for last-minute purchases. “Babe, can we pick one up? I want to see what the latest gossip is?” she begged me with a pouty face. Her thoughts threatened me saying if I ever spoke of this she would send poltergeists to haunt me.

“I don’t know baby I only brought enough money for the drinks,” I said, trying to make this sound believable.

“But babe,” she whined. I was just glad the soldiers couldn’t see her eyes. Any believability would have gone out the window seeing her glaring me down for making her do this.

I was about to tell her it was okay when the guard cut me off, “money trouble?” he asked, staring me down. Shit, that’s not what we wanted. If I say yes he’s going to ask for identification to make sure we didn’t have any powers, but if I say no he might not believe me. We have to-. Before I could finish my thought Ymir was already on it.

“No, not at all sir, this big dummy just decided to leave his wallet at home for our daily walk,” she said rolling her eyes at me.

“Well sorry, usually we don’t walk for this long. I wasn’t expecting us to get this thirsty,” I said shaking my head back and letting my arm fall away from her waist. She did the same with her arm as we started standing slightly farther apart.

“Why? I told you that I wanted to walk for longer today.”

“I thought you meant like ten minutes longer not an hour,” it’s working. Our argument is distracting them.

“Well, I just wanted to get out of that stuffy house for once is that so bad?”

“No, but-.” the soldier nervously cleared his throat trying to get our attention.

“Oh, I’m so sorry sir. He’s been picking fights with me all morning,” Ymir started up again and I found the opportunity to prove her point.

“Oh, I’m the one picking all the fights?” I asked, getting defensive. “You were the one who threw a whole fit when I said I wanted to stay home. Then when I agreed you threw another fit. I just can’t win with you!” I said, raising my voice slightly. I let out a deep sigh and turned to face away from her annoyed.

“We maybe if you weren’t such a shut-in” she started before the soldier cleared his throat uncomfortably again.

We both turned back to face him. “Sorry,” Ymir said with a tired sigh, “I think we’ve just been cooped up in the house together for too long,” she explained.

“I see. Everyone’s getting a little testy nowadays,” he said before pulling out a wallet and handing Ymir a five and saying, “buy your magazine sweety.”

She gave him a big smile and started gushing to him, “Oh my, you are so kind thank you so much, sir.”

He turned to me and just looked me up and down before letting out a sigh, “next time don’t forget your wallet with such a pretty lady here it would be a shame if someone stole her away.”

Before I could say anything his buddies called from him and they exited the store. Ymir and I just looked at each other both trying our damn hardest not to laugh and or vomit. We bought the drinks and the magazine and walked out of the store.

Not only did we get a magazine that could possibly have information to help us out, but we also had our enemy pay for it. If that ain’t the biggest fuck you ever then I don’t know what is. We waited until we were far enough away from the store before we started cracking up laughing.

“God I felt so stupid. He looked at me like I was a piece of meat. I wanted to kick him in his meat,” Ymir rolled her eyes while I laughed.

“That was the most awkward experience of my life.”

“You felt awkward? I had to act like a total ditz,” Ymir sighed, “please tell me we never have to do that again.”

“Hopefully not,” I laughed, “then again we make a good fake couple. I mean at least we have the stupid arguments down.”

We took a seat on a bench and looked through the magazine. At first, we thought it was a total bust until we got to the last few pages. “Here we go,” she said pointing at the page and reading a sentence out. “Exiles have started attacking people at random state officials warn everyone to stay indoors at night and follow curfew.” she pointed out. I waited for her to continue and when she didn’t.

“What else does it say?” I asked and she just shook her head.

“That’s it the rest goes on about random politicians saying the same exact things in different words,” she shrugged.

“Wait, it names them? I asked her to angle the magazine towards me.

“Yeah, why?”

I looked through all the names and what they were saying. I looked up at her and smiled. “I’m not sure yet, but I think this can be important.” I couldn’t put my finger on it exactly. There’s no way we can do any research into who these people are, but maybe we could have someone else do it. Someone who isn’t being watched as heavily. Maybe this could be the next step.

“What are you thinking?” she asked and I realized I was staring off into space with a smile on my face.

“I’m thinking we might have found answers. Maybe not the ones we were looking for, but some that we can use to not only get more information but also change our fate as a whole. She just stared at me confused wondering how the hell we were going to do that. I pulled out the newspaper and put the magazine with it putting them both in my pocket.

“Alright, should we start heading back?” I asked.

“I think we can find more information. There’s an electronic's store not far from here that usually has the news playing on TVs. After last night’s mission, Reiner’s death, and Shadis and Franz killing some guards we might learn something else if they decide to bring it up.” Ymir said and I nodded. We started walking in that direction. We ran into a billboard that had a phone number on it. Telling people where to call if they see a cursed or an exile around.

We made it to the store and sat on a bench across the street. I pulled out the newspaper again and handed her the magazine and we pretended to read while we watched the TVs that were playing advertisements at the moment.

After a few moments, we heard the TVs whirred to life with that sound that signaled the news was back on. We had to wait through the boring traffic alerts and the weather forecast until they started getting into the news.

“Last night during a routine patrol two brave soldiers lost their lives as a gang of exiles ambushed them. This horrendous crime has left two families devastated." So they are not only changing the narrative but also playing the sympathy card.

“The cursed beheaded another one as well as partially dismembered him cutting off one of his arms as well last night leaving his body parts in a different place than his body what this could possibly mean we aren’t sure yet.”

“I think they are trying to send us a sign,” the co-host stated.

“That could very well be a possibility,” the other host said back, “but all hope isn’t lost. Those brave heroes didn’t die in vain. They managed to bring down an exile while they were at it. We have one less menace on our hands. That is all, for now, we will update you when we have more but now for Ryan with the sports.”

it took everything I had not to get up and smash that TV. I looked at Ymir and saw her holding the magazine so tightly I thought she might rip in in half. "Hey," I whispered getting her attention. "Don't." She took a deep breath and let herself calm down before giving me a nod and reassuring me in her thoughts that she was okay.

Ymir and I looked at each other for a moment and stayed sitting for another ten minutes so as to not get up and leave after getting the specific information we came for. “Now it’s time to head back,” Ymir said seeing that half the day was spent walking around.

“Yeah, we will have to be careful getting back into base if anyone sees us we will have put everyone in danger,” I warned.

“Well, we have a while before we have to figure out how since we are a few miles from there,” she said.

“It’s going to be a long walk back.” We were used to walking a lot, but today we were walking for a few hours straight even running at some points. Both Ymir and I were exhausted and our muscles were already screaming at us even though we had no choice to push forward.

We walked towards base Ymir having Gabriel check ahead to make sure our path was clear. I heard her talking to Ilsa at one point to see if she could help us too. I think Ilsa wasn’t too happy with us for sneaking out cause her and Ymir seemed to be arguing. When I was sure Ilsa had left I decided to ask, “so do you know if Ilsa has seen Reiner?”

“She hasn’t, well at least I don’t think she has. If she has she hasn’t told me.”

“Okay,” I whispered. It was worth a shot asking. When we saw home base in the distance a feeling of both relief and panic washed over us. We’re home, but also we have to make sure not to expose this place.

“I’ll call in more reinforcements,” Ymir said right as I heard someone’s thoughts right behind us.

Oh shit. I felt someone tap on my shoulder and so did Ymir. fear washed over both of us. Ymir thought it was a stranger and it scared her. It scared me because I knew exactly who this was and it definitely wasn’t a stranger.

We turner around to see Mike glaring down at us. “This way,” he said, leaning us into an ally way where there would be a portal back into the base. It’s safe to say he was about to go track us down. He just left the base though does that mean they just found out we were missing.

“Busted,” Ymir whispered.

“Busted indeed. Good luck explaining your way out of this one,” Mike whispered back as we walked through the portal. I read his thoughts and sure enough, they knew for hours they had just finally decided on sending Mike out since we had been gone for too long. They thought we were captured.

Walking through the portal into the common room we saw everyone. Sitting or standing around. The main ones that stood out to me were Pixis, Shadis, and mom dead center with their arms crossed over their chests as they glared down at us. Just behind them was Eren and Christa with the same angry expression on their faces.

“Want to explain what was so important that you both left and jeopardize everyone’s safety?” Pixis asked, not really expecting us to have an answer.

Ymir and I looked at each other and without hesitation turned back to everyone and said one single word with all the confidence we could. “Answers.”


	103. Outburst

“Answers?” Pixis repeated. His tone asking us what the hell we meant by that.

We just nodded and I pulled out the newspaper and magazine handing them to him. He looked down at it confused before looking back up at me for an explanation of what he was looking at.

“Well, the whole debate about killing and morals stuck up a few questions that no one could answer, so I decided to go and get answers for myself. Ymir caught me and when I explained she said she wanted answers too.”

“I also wanted to make sure he didn’t get himself killed,” she added.

“Yeah, that too,” I mumbled before continuing. “My main question was why wasn’t the other side struggling with morality. I mean out enemies have no problem killing us, and normal civilians have no problem turning a blind eye to it. I wanted to know why that was.”

“It’s because they are monsters,” Berthold cut me off. He was angry for a multitude of reasons. He was pissed that I was trying to humanize the other side by trying to see why. He didn’t care why all he wanted was revenge, but surprisingly enough what pissed him off even more than that was that we risked our lives to get information he deemed worthless. He was absolutely livid because he thought he might lose us as well.

Pixis just put his hand up to silence him before nodding for us to continue. The glare has left his eyes and was replaced with curiosity as he waited to judge us on our explanation.

“I figured that the government had been brainwashing and manipulating people through lies and fear-mongering, but thinking that it’s happening and knowing are two different things. I had to be sure. On top of that, I also had to figure out what exactly they were saying that would make everyone see us as less than human to the point where they don’t even bat an eye at our deaths.”

“What did you find?” He finally asked his tone was unreadable but he waited patiently for us to continue.

“Well in the newspaper we found a false article that talked about heinous crimes we didn’t commit. They said we were killing guards and leaving their heads on wooden stakes as well as murdering innocent civilians.”

“In the magazine, it has a bunch of politicians' names in it too where it was talking about a curfew put in place for civilian safety,” Ymir said.

“We thought that we could maybe do research into these people and see if they are some of the ones spreading the lies?” I added on to her statement before remembering the news broadcast. “Oh, and on the news, they flipped the narrative of what happened last night. They said that the guards were doing a routine patrol and got ambushed before playing the sympathy card by bringing up the guards’ families.”

“They made it seem like it was a good thing that one of us got killed.” Ymir gritted her teeth as she remembered what they were saying, her rage coming back.

“They also seemed like there was way more of us there than there actually was,” I said

“That’s just what we were able to figure out in a few hours, but I really think Levi was onto something with this. I mean this information has to be helpful right?” Ymir asked Pixis, trying to look him in the eyes.

“I will admit this information could be useful,” he said and I watched as everyone else turned and glared at him. “But,” he said looking at everyone reassuring them that he wasn’t done, “you shouldn’t have left without telling anyone. You should have-.”

“We should have what?” I asked standing my ground. I know we are in deep shit and talking back probably will make things worse, but I couldn’t help but do so I know damn well where he is going with this and if we would have done what he is asking they would have shot us down. “Asked permission? We all know damn well if we did you would have said no. So what? What exactly should we have done?”

“That’s not- if you would have explained-.” he started and I cut him off again.

“Don’t even finish that sentence again we know damn well even if we had the most thought out plan and a whole team prepared you would have shot us down without listening saying it was too soon or that we needed time to grieve. Well everyone grieves differently, and my way of grieving was trying to figure out why exactly my friend died and no one batted an eye while it happened. This information was my closure. It's what I needed to be able to handle all of this. His death, the whole morality debate, everything.”

Pixis just stood there staring at me he was still trying to find a way to argue against us and I just couldn’t care less anymore. “Just take the damn information and make some use out of it I’m done going in circles with you,” I finally said before marching right past him and heading to my room. Ymir tailing after me with her head down and her tail between her legs not wanting to be left there with him after my outburst.

We both walked into my room and before I could ask her why she followed me in here she started talking, “you just yelled at Pixis. Man, we are really screwed now. I’m too scared to go out there alone.”

There was a knock at the door and I had had enough with everyone right now. “Unless it’s Eren go the hell away,” I yelled before sitting on the bed. I can’t exactly kick Eren out since this is his room too, even though he would probably have a few choice words for me too.

Despite my demand mom walked in anyway. “Is that any way to talk to your mother?” she asked a little offended.

“Depends, are you going to lecture me?” I asked.

“Well yes, it’s my job, but I will say first I don’t think what you did was fully wrong. You definitely were right when you said if you asked everyone would have said no.” She said walking closed before mentally asking if she could sit down next to me. I nodded and she called Ymir over to sit down too.

She wrapped her arms around both of us and I knew it was half because she was worried about us and was just happy we came home, the other half was so that we couldn’t escape as she tried to lecture us.

“Even though I think you guys were right not to ask first I still think you guys could have gone about this differently. Maybe instead of asking permission from Pixis, you could have just made sure more people knew where you were. I mean I know you two aren’t the only reckless ones around here,” she said and I shrugged she had a point there. “You could have asked them to be back up for you or at least let them know where you were going so if something did go wrong they could tell us where you were.”

Even though mom was acting very calm about this I could tell she was furious. She was so angry and just downright hurt that we didn’t trust her enough to tell her where we were going. She was furious that we would put ourselves in that much danger with no backup plan, without telling anyone. She would be even more furious if she realized that not only did we not have a backup plan but we didn’t have a plan period.

She was keeping a level head because she knew we didn’t need to be yelled at she knew that it would only do more harm than good to yell at us especially after seeing my outburst with Pixis. I will be the first to admit I’m not the most stable person at the moment and the last thing she wanted was to set me off. All I do is shove my emotions down until they explode and I’m slowly getting to my breaking point.

“If there is a next time we will be sure to do that,” I said more sarcastically than anything knowing damn well if we tried to pull this shit again she might actually kill us.

She didn’t even bother replying to my sarcastic remark she just smacks us both upside the head. “That was for worrying me,” she said before wrapping her arms back around us and giving us a tight hug. “And this is because I’m glad you’re both okay.”

“Now Ymir, Christa wants to see you,” she said, letting go of her giving her and out.

“I think I would rather stay in here,” Ymir whispered.

“No you don’t,” I said back knowing full well that the second she left mom was going to go off on me one way or another. “But then again I might like it if you stayed,” I said and she figured out what was about to happen.

“Oh.” She just walked out of the room without another word.

The room fell silent and I felt all sorts of emotions coming from mom to the point where I couldn’t tell what she was about to do. All of a sudden I heard her sniffle and realized that she was crying. “Don’t you ever do that again,” she said her eyes looking into mine. They held more fear than anger, “I was so scared when they told me you weren’t in the building. I thought- I thought I had lost you too,” her voice came out as a forced whisper. “I can’t lose you too.”

“Mom-.”

“Don’t get me wrong I love everyone here, but you. You’re my kid,” she said desperately. “I’ve known you since you were little. You’re all I have left I can’t lose you.” she said her voice breaking as she pulled me close she just kept muttering “I can’t lose you.”

“I’m not going anywhere.” I finally forced out. “No matter what missions I go on I’ll always come back. I won’t make you feel that pain again,” I said rubbing her back.

“Good. Remember what I said, you know I am fully serious when I say if you ever get killed on a mission I will go there myself and kill everyone or die trying,” she said with such fury in her voice that I knew she did mean it.

“I know.” I waited until she calmed down before I told her everything we did so she knew we weren’t really in danger. I even told her how Ymir had to act all ditzy and she got a laugh out of it before swearing she wouldn’t tell Ymir I told her. 

After we finished talking she let me know that she would talk to Pixis and make sure he isn’t too mad about everything, not that he actually seemed that mad, to begin with to our surprise.

"I hope he doesn't expect an apology cause I'm not sorry and I'm not going to pretend like I am."

"I'm not going to make you apologize, especially since I agree with your logic, however, I do think you should talk to him and try and be civil he is only just trying to look after you all the best he can."

"I know he is but sometimes he needs to back off a little," I mumbled. Mom didn't bother arguing with me she just gave me a pat on the head and headed out to talk to them. When she left I saw Eren walk in and I knew I was in deep shit once again.


	104. Guilt

“Hey baby,” I said awkwardly, giving him a smile as I got off the bed and took a step closer to him and he reacted about as well as I expected.

“No,” he said sternly pointing towards the bed. “Sit your ass back down.”

I didn’t even bother trying to argue it would just make things worse. I sat down and folded my hands in my lap waiting for him to come join me on the bed so we could talk this out, but he didn't. He stayed standing in the doorway. We just stared at each other from across the room, his arms folded and his muscles tense.

“What on earth were you thinking,” he asked and I felt like mom had possessed him all of the sudden. Was he going to give me the lecture since she didn’t? The room fell quiet as I tried to read the room. I mean his thoughts were guarded and hard to read, but his emotions were clear as day he was pissed, and even a little anxious.

“I needed answers,” I said flat out. I didn’t know what else to say besides what had already been said earlier. Did he expect me to change my answers now that we’re alone cause it’s not gonna happen. I wasn’t lying when I said that was my reason for leaving. I just wish the answers I got were a little clearer but what we found will have to do for now.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he tried to keep his composure and not yell. “So you said,” he said sarcastically rolling his eyes before glaring me down again, “that’s not what I mean. I wasn’t asking why you wanted to go, I'm asking why? Why did it have to be today? Why did you bring Ymir? Why did you leave without telling anyone? Without telling me?”

“So you’re not mad that I left you are mad that I left without you?” I asked trying to get him to clarify.

“No,” he said, raising his voice a little before clearing his throat and trying to even his tone back out. He let his arms fall to his sides as he clenched his fists. “I’m pissed that you left but I’m fucking furious that you felt like you couldn’t tell me.”

“Well, if I told you then you would have either tried to stop me or would have insisted on going with me.”

“Yeah and?” he asked, wondering what was so wrong with that.

“Eren, you're still injured you can’t just go out on a twelve-hour stroll, and I couldn’t have you stop me.”

“Oh, so when it’s a dangerous mission and you're injured you can use the promise as a threat but when the roles are reversed you can’t even do me the decency to tell me that you are leaving.”

“That’s not-,” I started, “I didn’t mean-. Eren I-.” No matter what sentence I tried, the words died in my throat. I didn’t want to say anything that would piss him off more, but I wanted to explain myself. I didn’t mean to make him feel like I can’t talk to him. I especially don’t want him to think that I will do this any time I have a reckless whim. I know it was a dick move leaving him here, but I didn’t even think of our promise since that usually only went for missions. I didn’t see this as a mission, but he did. “This was different.”

“Oh really?” he asked, his tone rising with a mocking inflection as his eyes glared me down. Danger. That was definitely the wrong phrase to use.

“That’s not what I meant,” I said quickly, trying to do damage control before he decides to kill me over my poor choice in phrases.

“Well what did you mean?” he asked venom dripping from his words now.

“I think there was a miscommunication,” I said and watched as he narrowed his eyes.

“Explain,” his tone was flat and unreadable now. I’m on thin fucking ice.

“You clearly saw what we did today as a mission, am I right in making that assumption?” he just nodded wanting me to continue. “Well, I never saw it as a mission. The thought never crossed my mind that this was a mission which thinking back it probably should have. I saw it more as a learning experience.”

“A learning experience?” He asks. “Do you also see recon missions as a learning experience?” He asked.

“Not really,” I said confused about where he was going with this.

“Oh. Well, you do realize that’s exactly what you just did with Ymir right?” he asked, staring me down. “You might not have been in costume and sure it was during the day in public, but you gathered information that could be used later to help us with missions did you not?” he asked.

I just sat back and thought about it. He was right. I did a recon mission without even thinking about it. From his perspective, it really does look like I purposely excluded our promise to go on a mission without him. “Oh.” Was all I could mumble.

“So where is this miscommunication you were talking about?” He asked, folding his arms. “Even if you didn’t think it was a mission you still went out knowing it would be dangerous without even so much as leaving me a note.” both of his hands gripped his arms harder as he started to shake in anger. “I woke up lost and confused. Do you know how scared I was when I walked around the whole building and no one knew where you had gone? How scared I was when hours passed and no one knew anything? You were just gone without an explanation.”

He let out a shaky breath as his eyes fell to the floor. “I spent hours pacing back and forth in this tiny ass room waiting for something. Anything. The whole time my thoughts were coming up with the worst scenarios. ‘He left because he couldn’t stand you anymore,’ or ‘he’s captured and getting tortured right now,’ or worse ‘he’s dead in a ditch somewhere and I’m never going to be able to say goodbye, or ever truly going to know what happened. Turns out you were just going on a recon mission.” He said his hands gripping his arms so tightly his nails were starting to dig into his skin he was shaking so bad I thought he might collapse.

“Eren, I’m sorry I didn’t even think-.” I said trying to stop the excuses. I stood up and walked over to him. “I’m sorry.” I reached my hand out to try and touch his and make him realize that he was hurting himself with how hard he was grabbing his arms, but the second my hand touched his I heard a loud crack and stared at him a little shocked as I tried to process what happened.

I brought my hand up to the burning sensation on my cheek as he looked at me with wide eyes. He looked as shocked as I did. “I-.” he froze at first looking down at his red hand and then back up at my cheek with a matching red mark. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-.” he said, shrinking into himself. He wanted to run to get away from everything, his anxiety sending him into flight or fight and his first instinct in this situation was flight.

I grabbed his arm before he could act on it and actually run out of the room. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to, I’m so so so sorry,” he said over and over again. He sounded scared. He was scared I would retaliate, he was scared I would hate him, he was scared of his own actions.

“It’s okay,” I said calmly, keeping my tone normal and soothing. I know he didn’t mean it. He was lost in his thoughts when I grabbed his arm. He just acted on reflex he didn’t actually mean to. However, even knowing that it still hurt not just physically, but emotionally.

“I think we are both a little high strung right now, we just need to lay down and talk things through in a calm manner,” I said trying to deescalate the situation.

“Yeah,” he nodded trying to get his breathing back to normal. I gently led him over to the bed and we both laid down facing each other taking some deep breaths.

I pushed back any hurt emotions from getting slapped. I can deal with those later. I mean I deserved it, but it was hard not to dwell on the fact that he actually hit me. It wasn’t the first time we have laid our hands on each other, but it was the first time that it happened outside of a sparring match.

“I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean to,” he said his eyes looking at my red cheek. His hand hesitantly reached until his fingers lightly touched my cheek. It still stung a little from the impact, but his fingers lightly caressing it made me feel a little better.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you either,” I said letting my hand grab his. I gave it a light squeeze before continuing. “I should have told you. Even if I knew you would tag along I still should have done something at least leave you a note as you said, but I think you were right. I didn’t mean to break the promise or be a hypocrite with it, but I still did whether I realized it or not.” I said looking down and taking a calming breath before looking back up in his eyes, “I won’t ever do it again, and that I promise you.”

“Good,” Eren let out a deep breath and his body relaxed, “should we just call this even?” He asked. “We both just hurt each other without meaning to and now we both are feeling really guilty and that doesn’t feel good,” he said, feeling both mine and his guilt bounce around by my powers.

“Okay, we’re even,” I said with a nod, but I could tell he wasn’t going to drop his guilt any time soon, and honestly neither was I. I just decided to change the subject.

“I would kill to be a fly on the wall in Ymir and Christa’s room right about now.”

“Oh, same,” Eren laughed welcoming the subject change.

“She actually did talk to Christa first, but she lied to her,” I explained.

“I know Christa told me and she looked pissed.”

“Well Ymir’s dead, it was nice knowing her,” I joked.

“I wonder who will plan the funeral?”

I just shrugged my shoulder, “Maybe Christa when her blind rage settles and she realizes she’s killed her?” I said.

“Probably,” He smiled.


	105. Eren’s Last Nerve

The next few days were pure torture. I know Levi fucked up big time but I feel like I’m being punished too. It wasn’t officially decided by anyone in particular, but everyone mentally came to their own conclusion that to stop Levi from doing that again they would all keep a close eye on him. So at all hours of the day not only do we have eyes trained on us, but we have people barging into our room at random times to make sure we are still in there. I nearly screamed after Shadis walked into the room for the fifth time today.

I heard a knock on the door and I was about to blow up at whoever walked in until I heard a voice yell on the other side of the wall. “They are still in there. Can you knock it off and just beat it?” the voice said before Jean pushed past whoever was trying to check in on us and looked at Levi.

“I blame you for this. I can’t even take a damn nap with all the noise outside my door of people checking on you,” he glared.

“I know I’m sorry I already told everyone I won’t be leaving like that again so they can stop but they don’t believe me.”

Jean looked at me and smiled letting out a breathy laugh, “this seems to be getting under your skin?” he asked looking at the irritation carved into my face.

“If one more damn person knocks on that door or just barges in without saying anything I’m going to lose my shit.”

Jean turned to Levi who just nodded, “He’s hanging on by a single thread, and the next person that walks through the door is the scissors.” Levi had been hearing my increasing frustration in my thoughts and feeling it through my emotions. All I wanted to do was lay in bed and relax but I felt like all that was happening was interruption after interruption. I couldn’t even take a nap without someone stomping down the hall and badging into the room.

Before anyone could say anything I heard it. The final thread being cut. The footsteps approached and I watched as both Levi and Jean turned to warn the poor fool who had just set me off. The curtain in the doorway moved and before anyone could say anything they were thrown out of the room by a gravity field I had made. I heard their back hit the wall with a thud and both Jean and Levi ran out of the room to check on them. I couldn’t be bothered serves them right.

“Connie are you okay?” I heard Levi ask while Jean just laughed. Their voices muffled as they entered the hallway.

“You were kinda asking for that one,” Jean said, “this is what your third time getting yelled at to leave.”

“What do you mean getting yelled out I didn’t get yelled at I got thrown 10 feet into a wall.”

“Should have learned your lesson after the first two times of getting yelled at.”

“I thought it was three strikes, not two.”

“Three strikes and you're out, you had your two warnings,” Levi said before walking back into the room.

“Well, hope you learned your lesson now I would get out of here before he comes out here and beats the shit out of you even more. Oh also, spread the warning to everyone else cause Eren’s had enough. He’s no longer giving warnings he’s just flinging bitches,” Jean said before coming back in the room and walking over to me leaning his head on my shoulder.

“Feeling better after beating up Connie.”

“A little,” I nodded.

I heard more footsteps approaching and as I prepared to throw another person out of the room I heard a voice from the hallway yelling at me, “I’m here to visit not to bug,” Marco said quickly already knowing how fed up with this we were.

“You can come in,” I said and he did. The only people allowed in this room at the moment were Jean, Marco, Ymir, and mom. They weren’t coming in to check up on us; they were just coming in for the normal reasons like to talk and hang out, or to let us know when meals are ready.

“So someone finally had enough?” Marco asked, “or did Connie purposely fly across the room and land on his head?” Marco asked, looking more at me than Levi. We were both fed up with the situation but Levi knew he was in trouble and had accepted it. On the other hand, I didn’t do shit so I’m not taking this shit from everyone.

“He deserved it, and anyone else who comes to that door after his warning goes out does too,” I whispered before collapsing back on the bed finally letting myself relax knowing that no one is stupid enough to come in after that. Connie would be the only exception well and maybe Jean, but he’s already allowed in so it doesn’t count.

I let my eyes start to close listening to Marco, Jean, and Levi all talk quietly. They sat down on the bed and Levi started lightly running his fingers through my hair. I was about to fall asleep when I heard that dreaded noise. Those damn footsteps coming down the hallway, and from the sound of it, there was more than one person.

“If they think coming in pairs will spare them then they are wrong,” I mumbled, prying my eyes open as I sat up and waited for them to come in.

Auruo and Pixis poked their heads in and before I could throw them out Auruo spoke up. “Wait, hold your fire this is important,” he said and I paused for a moment raising an eyebrow. I wasn’t very convinced, but I let him talk. I would decide whether or not to throw him out after.

They turned to Levi and started talking, “those names that you gave us and that information,” Auruo started. “We found some things.”

I instantly sat back and let him talk. Levi’s muscles tensed up and I could tell he wanted to know everything. It didn’t take a mind reader to read his thoughts. He wanted to know if this was all worth it. If the information was actually useful and could help.

“I was able to get in contact with some other groups of exiles and Molbit was able to do some more in-depth research at the library using their computers,” Auruo explained how they got the information and I could tell Levi was tuning him out he didn’t care how they got it he just wanted to know what they found out.

“Auruo,” Pixis said clearing his throat to stop him from rambling on about the unimportant stuff.

“Oh, right, well, we did figure out that a lot of these people are responsible for the fear-mongering and some of them are the ones passing all these insane rules.”

“They have a few bills that they are trying to pass and they are promoting them by fear-mongering. Some of the politicians are going to be going on interviews and doing speeches addressing some of the reason supposed killings that have been happening.”

“What can we do?” Levi asked his whole tone screaming that he wanted to go on whatever mission they might be planning.

“Hold your horses,” Pixis said putting his hands up to try and ease the situation, “we aren’t planning a mission-.”

“Why not, we could do so much to-.” Levi cut him off but Pixis put his hand up and cut him off.

“Wait a minute let me finish,” Pixis said calmly knowing Levi was getting frustrated. “We aren’t planning a mission just yet,” he said, finishing his sentence from before. “We want to try and get some more information first before we try and take on the whole government. We just thought we should tell you and Ymir that your information got us further,” he explained.

Levi took a deep breath and nodded. “Okay, thank you. Please let me know when you do plan a mission.” he tried to keep his voice calm realizing he was a little tense and frustrated before.

“Okay, we will let you know if we find anything else,” Pixis nodded. “Also we will stop checking up on you guys,” he said looking towards me. “The last thing we need is anyone else getting thrown up against a wall.”

“Good,” I mumbled before plopping back down in bed and laying my head back in Levi’s lap. I closed my eyes back and listened to the sweet sound of their footsteps disappearing down the hall.

I got a little frustrated and opened my eyes looking around seeing Levi still staring at the doorway. I cleared my throat to get his attention to let him know I was frustrated. He looked down at me and then laughed at what had me so irritated. He instantly moved his hand back to play with my hair. I gave him a satisfied nod and closed my eyes again hoping I can try and get as comfortable and maybe just maybe take a nap.

“Well, you guys actually did something good for once,” Jean teased but he was actually really proud of Levi.

“What he means is good job because of you and Ymir we were able to actually learn some things,” Marco said, nudging Jean.


	106. Important

A little over a week went by and I could tell Levi was starting to lose his mind a little. He was tired of us sitting on the information and doing nothing about it. “They told me they would look more into it and get back to me but I still haven’t heard anything from them and these interviews and speeches that they were talking about are going to pass and what will happen after that? We need to try and figure out something before that happens if these new bills get implemented we’re gonna be in even deeper shit.” Levi said rambling for what felt like the hundredth time today.

“Baby, I know you’re on edge we all are but they are probably just trying to get all the information they can first.” I tried to assure him.

“Are you sure? I thought that a week ago, but now I think they are stalling. I get that they want to give people time to grieve and all that shit, but most of us are tired of grieving all of our friends. Most of us are angry and want to do something about it.”

“I know, trust me I know, but we have to be patient I’m sure they are trying to find the best possible way to go about this.”

“I’m done being patient!” He raised his voice. I just raised an eyebrow at him, glaring him dead in the eyes reminding him who he was talking to.

“Sorry,” he mumbled before lowering his voice, “If they still don’t have enough information then why haven’t they told me that? Why can’t they just fill me in on what they do have?” he asked.

“Who knows,” I shrugged, “You know how secretive they are with some information. Maybe they feel like they have enough that if they told you you would act on it, but not enough to actually make a safe plan.”

Levi just glared at me and let out a sigh, “I already told them I wouldn't pull any more reckless shit for this month.”

“They probably don’t believe you. To be completely honest neither do I because I know how reckless we both can be and neither of us would sit on that information.”

He plopped down on the bed and laid back letting out a loud sigh. “I fucking hate this.”

“I know you do,” I said laying down next to him and giving him a calm little smile. “Maybe I can take ur mind off it?” I asked letting the smile turn into a more devious one.

“I’d like that,” he said, finally letting a smile slip onto his face

There was a knock at our door and he let out a frustrated sigh, “Of course,” he groaned.

“Is this a bad time?” Ymir asked, poking her head in the room hearing the groan.

“Yes,” Levi said, rolling his eyes.

“No it’s fine come in,” I elbowed Levi trying to tell him to be nice.

“Actually I was wondering if I could talk to you, alone.” She looked to Levi who all of the sudden sat up and got really serious. “It’s important.’

“We’ll be right back,” he said, giving me a small smile that I could tell was forced. I watched them walk out of the room and shook my head.

“Obvious motherfuckers,” I rolled my eyes and laid back down on the bed. You’d think if they were trying to keep it a secret they would hide it better. I mean they might as well be waving around a banner telling everyone hey we are hiding something that you can probably guess what just by looking at the obvious and dumb look on our faces. I let out a frustrated sigh kinda upset that they are trying to leave me in the dark again. They better at least tell Reiner I miss him… that we all miss him.

We walked out into the hallway but not before I caught the last bit of Eren’s thoughts. “He knows,” I told her.

“I don’t care if he knows he’s not the one I’m worried about,” she said crossing her arms and holding herself as she looked down the hallway paranoid that someone might come out of their room. “What am I supposed to do?” She asked, looking at me desperately.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean he wants to talk to Berthold and Shadis, but I don’t think they are ready for that yet. Berthold is all aboard the revenge train and isn’t giving himself time to grieve. Shadis is still a complete wreck and barely leaves his room anymore. He sure as hell hasn’t been handling his grief either. What am I supposed to do? Reiner is being very persistent, but I know they aren’t ready.”

“Is he here right now?” I asked looking around before realizing I wouldn’t be able to see him. I guess I’m still not used to him being gone either.

“He’s been here nagging me all morning. I was right he still is a little pissed about the whole Ilsa thing and he woke me up by throwing something at me so yeah I think he’s going to keep bugging me until he gets what he wants.

“Well, what exactly does he want? Just to tell them he’s here or-.”

“No, he wants to talk to them about everything. People aren’t ready to talk yet especially not about how he died,” she said glaring off at where I assumed Reiner was. She jolted her head forwards letting out a little yip, “Ouch, hey asshole that hurt,” she rubbed at the back of her head. “He’s not taking no for an answer.”

“Reiner, look, I know you must be losing your mind on the other side, but you have to believe Ymir. People aren’t ready. I never understood this at first, but after Ymir did this with Ilsa it started to make sense even now it does. I miss you man, Eren misses you, hell everyone misses you, but if you spring them on them now all it’s going to do is hurt more.” I said speaking straight from my own emotions. I know I told Ymir to let me know when he appeared but I really wasn’t ready for this and it really does stop the grieving process and almost reset it. He’s right here in front of me out of sight and out of reach and that hurts more than him not being here at all.

“Look, I don’t know if you can still feel my emotions, but I know sure as hell you know how this feels. It hurts. It hurts so much. We miss you so much, but if we don’t accept that we can’t ever see you again then all it’s going to do is hurt more later. People aren’t going to be able to process everything that happened. I still haven’t even processed this. Hell, I keep thinking I’m going t blink and see you standing right here.

I took a deep breath and looked up to where I thought he was by following Ymir’s eyes. “I know you want to help them, that’s all you’ve ever wanted to do was to look after them and keep people safe, but you have to let them go through this by themselves even if it’s just for a little longer. You will get to talk to them I promise, but not now.”

After I finished talking I looked at Ymir wondering if he actually stayed to listen or if he just vanished leaving me to spill my emotions to an empty space.

“Thank you,” Ymir said to me before turning her head to where Riener must be. “Yes please, just a little longer is all we are asking.”

“I do want to ask if you know what’s happening with everyone?” How much does he know? Does he know Berthold is legit about to go and try to kill people? That he’s gone a little mad with the whole revenge thing. He doesn’t want to listen to reason and nothing we tell him is going to pull him back from that. Does he know or has he just been kinda like asleep this whole time?

“He knows. That’s a big reason he wants to talk to them,” Ymir told me.

“I think he should talk to them, but not today. They need a little more time to process everything and then we can ease them into talking about everything. Maybe he can actually talk some sense into Berthold.”

“Maybe,” Ymir nodded before turning her head again.

“What? No, don't do that!” she said, raising her voice slightly. “You aren’t going to smack him upside the head that won’t help anything.”

I just let a small smile across my face. Well, some things never change. “Just catch up with Ilsa and we will give it a few days okay,” Ymir begged. “Okay thank you,” she let out a sigh before addressing me.

“He left, thank god.”

“He knows that we really do miss him right?” I asked, letting my eyes fall to the floor.

“Of course he does, I think he misses us as much as we miss him.”

“I’m going to head back to my room and get some more sleep since he woke me up at the ass crack of dawn,” she said letting out a yawn.

“Has he really been keeping you up that long?” I asked, realizing it was almost nightfall.

“Yeah, he’s the same insufferable bastard,” she laughed but I could tell she was just relieved he was here.

I headed back into the room hoping that Eren’s offer still stands even if I’m not in the mood anymore. Hopefully, I can get back in the mood? Or maybe we can just cuddle I mean he might not be in the mood either since he knew exactly what this was about. Your dead friend paying you a visit doesn’t exactly keep the mood alive now does it?

I walked in and sat down on the bed and he just looked at me waiting for me to give him an excuse or tell him a lie.

“I told Reiner we missed him,” I said being honest. I mean he knows what we were doing and he wanted to tell him that so hopefully he doesn’t mind that I did it for him.

“What did he say back?” Eren asked sitting up with hopeful eyes.

“I don’t really know, Ymir and him were arguing so she didn’t say the full conversation, but she’s sure he misses us too.”

“Good,” Eren whispered, wrapping his arms around me and burying his head in my chest.

Auruo walked in and cleared his throat, “sorry am I interrupting?”

“No it’s fine,” Eren mumbled sitting up. He wasn’t happy with him barging in but he knew I wanted to hear what he had to say.

“Pixis wants to talk with you,” he said, gesturing for me to follow him.

“Okay, I’ll be right back Eren,” I said, giving him a smile.

“Don’t take too long,” he whispered before laying back down, turning his back to me. I guess this hit him hard too.

I got up and walked over placing a kiss on his cheek before following Auruo to Pixis’s office.


	107. Empathy

I know I should be happy to know that Reiner is around and watching over us, but I think knowing just hurts more. I mean I know he's around but we won't ever be able to see him again. Knowing that he’s watching Berthold go down the road to madness unable to do anything physically hurts. He must be losing his mind right now. I wonder if that’s why Ymir needed Levi’s help because Reiner wants to stop Berthold, but knowing Ymir she won’t help him until she thinks Berthold is ready.

I wonder if he’s just sitting by Berthold’s side trying desperately trying to comfort him, but he can’t. I wonder if Berthold knows he’s here? I mean he has to have some clue right? If not he’s probably hoping he is… unless… Maybe he wishes he wasn’t. Maybe Berthold is desperately hoping that Reiner passed on.

I sat up and pulled the pillow into my chest as my heart started to physically hurt at the thought. I mean it makes more sense that way. He wouldn’t be acting this way if he knew Reiner could see him, even if he hoped he could. He’s probably hoping that Reiner passed on. Maybe in his mind, it would hurt less. He wouldn’t have to think that Reiner is just right there but out of reach. That he is instead at peace rather than stuck watching over us in this hell.

I let my mind wander as the somber feeling set in. If I lost Levi would I want him to stick around or pass over? I shook my head as the intrusive thought appeared. No, I don’t want to think about that. I don’t ever want to think of a world without Levi in it. A world where I have to choose between living without him totally or living with him just out of reach and any conversation having to go through Ymir.

I felt tears sting at my eyes as I couldn’t clear those thoughts from my head anymore. More and more intrusive thoughts kept appearing. What if it happens. What if I lose him. What if-.

“Hey baby, hey it’s okay, I’m right here I’m not going anywhere,” Levi said putting his hand on my back as he sat next to me on the bed. I didn’t even hear him come into the room.

“Sorry, I just-.” My voice went quiet as the thoughts started to come back. But what if. I shook my head again trying to clear them.

Levi just pulled me into his chest and ran his finger through my hair. “It’s okay baby.”

“Berthold must be going through hell right now,” I finally forced out. I mean I knew he probably wasn’t doing well, but anytime anyone tries to help him he tells us he’s fine and he doesn’t want to talk about it.

“He would be if he let himself feel anything,” I heard Levi mumble.

So he’s definitely not doing good, he’s not letting himself feel because he knows when he does it’s going to hurt. Is that why he’s going crazy about revenge? Does he think that will help? It won’t. I mean don’t get me wrong I’m all down for revenge, but this is wrong. When he’s done with all of his revenge when there’s no one left to take revenge on then what?

I shook my head again and took a deep shaky breath. I need to clear my head from all these thoughts. “Help please,” I whispered out with a shaky breath as my body started to tremble.

“Okay, it’s okay,” Levi said, taking a deep breath and I felt a calm emotion being pushed over me. I felt as my breathing evened out and I was able to take a deep breath with ease. I leaned my head on Levi’s shoulder as I closed my eyes and just let myself breathe. It was always a weird feeling when Levi pushed emotions over me. I could feel that they weren’t mine and it was almost like someone was sedating me every time that calm feeling is pushed on me. I didn’t like the feeling, but I knew it helped the most.

“Feeling better?” Levi asked, rubbing my back.

“Yeah,” I whispered, “Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” Levi said, kissing my cheek. “You don’t ever need to apologize for your emotions.”

“I know, but it’s unfair of me to ask you to force emotions on me because I can’t handle my own.”

“Hey, don’t think of it like that,” he said bringing his hand up to my cheek and caressing it lightly, “we all need some help sometimes.”

“I seem to need it more than most,” I mumbled.

“That’s not true. Half the time you're too busy taking care of other people. You do realize the reason you started getting overwhelmed was that you were worried about how Berthold felt right?”

“No I was worried about you and if I lost you.”

“I mean at the end maybe a little. It’s called empathy Eren. You were thinking about how he felt and what thoughts were going through his head and it’s only natural to try and relate to those feelings. And you did just that. Not only did you relate to them, but you physically felt the pain he would be going through.”

I just sat there before realizing that Levi knows what’s going on in Berthold's head; he's the only one who does. “Wait, so how is he feeling. I know you said he’s not letting himself feel anything, but-.”

“I know about as much as you guys. He’s cut me off too. Whenever I’m near his thoughts and feelings are guarded he’s putting up as many walls as he can. He doesn’t want to let anyone in if he can help it.”

“Of course, he’s always been a stubborn bastard, he’s just usually been quieter about his stubbornness whereas Reiner was always open about his.”

“They were the perfect match, they could always make each other cave in. We really need Reiner to bring Bertholf back before it’s too late. I don’t want to lose him too. At this point, we're going to lose the Berthold we knew.”

“Reiner wants to help trust me it hurts him just as much as it hurts us probably more, but right now Ymir doesn’t think Berthold is ready for that, and honestly neither do I. He’s not ready to open up to us, he’s definitely not ready to accept the fact that Reiner can see everything he’s doing. Like you were thinking earlier I think he’s hoping that Reiner can’t see him.”

“Have you heard any of his thoughts about Reiner at least?”

“None. As far as I can tell he hasn’t thought about him much aside from the face he wants to get revenge to make his death mean something.”

“Great,” I let out a sigh. Well, that’s pretty much what we all know.

“So what did they have to say?” I asked remembering that Levi was practically pacing about this information earlier.

“Well, nothing much. They said that they know a bit more information, but that it’s harder to come by since no other groups of exiles are looking into this. Molbit was able to find the most information, but even that isn’t much.”

“Well, what do they know?”

“Well,” he sighed and I knew that it wasn’t going to be good, “not a lot, we know there's going to be press conferences, but there aren’t any official dates released as of yet.”

“So basically they’ve learned nothing.”

“Not exactly,” he shrugged, “they learned more about past news broadcasts and articles, so we were able to figure out what they were saying and why people are able to turn a blind eye with ease.”

“Oh. Do I even want to know?” I asked.

“Not really. The shit they were making up was pretty awful.”

“Great. Do we have any way to combat that yet?”

“They were looking into it. We can’t exactly debunk what they’re saying without exposing ourselves just yet, but we were trying to think of a way we could without putting ourselves in danger.”

“Wait you said there were press conferences coming up?”

“Yeah.”

“I might have an idea of how we could get a message out there without directly exposing ourselves to danger,” I said and Levi just looked at me confused. He read my mind and gave me a smile.

“Have I ever told you that you're a genius?” he asked.

“A few times, but it’s nice to hear it again.”

“Well you’re a fucking genius,” he said before placing a kiss on my cheek. “Write that down and when the time comes you need to tell them about that plan.”

“I will.”


	108. Offer From Earlier

I laid back down in the bed exhausted. Too many emotions going around today. I let my eyes close before falling Levi’s hands dip the bed as he leaned over me. I opened my eyes to meet his and he just gave me a smile before leaning in and placing a soft kiss on my lips. “Are you already tired?”

“I was, but now I think I’m wide awake,” I said running my hands over his hips pulling him closer by his belt loops.

“Does that offer from earlier still stand?” he asked

“Well, if I remember correctly the offer was to take your mind off of not getting the information. You already got the information, what’s there to take your mind off of?” I asked smugly.

“I don’t want to take my mind off anything. I just want you to be the only thing on my mind. Is that too much to ask?”

“Not at all,” I said, pulling his hips down so that his hips were flat against mine and his lips came down to lightly graze against mine. Before our lips could fully lock he pulled his head back up and gave me a wicked smile.

“Damn you,” I hissed.

“What?” he asked feigning innocence.

“Don’t what me,” I said before getting fed up with his teasing. I flipped him over until he was pinned to the bed with me straddling his lap. I held both of his hands pinned above his head with one hand while my other hand lightly hooked under his chin tilting his eyes up to meet mine.

I leaned in and pressed my lips to his making a point that I get what I want.

“Someone is feeling extremely dominant today,” he mumbled the second our lips moved apart.

“After you raised your voice at me and did nothing but bitch all day yeah I got a little testy. Maybe I just want a little payback.”

“Oh I see well what are you going to do about it?” he asked with a smug smile. I wanted to wipe that smile right off his face.

“I want you to put that mouth to work, I said, giving him a devilish smile.

“Were in the wrong position for that.”

“Then get on your knees,” I said before getting off of him so he can move.

“Yes sir,” he said with a purr in his voice before sliding off the bed and kneeling down. I slid to the edge of the bed and he grabbed at my thighs before plaming at the bulge in my pants. “Already excited,” he whispered.

“I didn’t tell you to speak, I told you to put that mouth to work,” I said and he smiled biting his lip, and nodded back in response.

He undid my pants and lowered them before slipping my hardening member out of my underwear.

His eyes glanced up to meet mine and he gave me a smile before licking down the shaft. “Good,” I said biting my lip not wanting anything else to slip out.

Before he took the head in his mouth he swiveled his tongue around the head and slit. He just opened his eyes looked up into mine and it took everything I had not to pin him to the bed and fuck his brains out right then and there. God, he’s so fucking sexy. There’s no way I can hold back when he looks at me like that.

“If I’m being too rough let me know, but I’m not going to hold back,” I said running my fingers through his hair and grabbing hold. I didn’t want to force his head at the start, but I couldn’t help myself. He took the head in his mouth and I felt my arm start to guide his head lightly. I was holding back as much as I could at the start, but I knew this self-control wouldn’t last long.

After he started to bob his head taking more and more of me in I couldn’t help but guide his head more and more. I tried to stop myself from bucking my hips, but his lips just felt so good wrapped around me. He didn’t help either with his eyes looking up into mine ever once in a while making me lose the little control I had left.

I was surprised he wasn’t choking on my dick with how hard I was fucking his face and his little tight throat. I couldn’t hold on much longer and I knew I was so close to coming.

“Yes baby,” I whispered out trying not to moan too loudly. The last thing we needed was anyone walking in with a noise complaint. “Swallow it,” I breathed, pulling his hair as I bucked my hips so that my dick hit the back of his throat one last time.

I threw my head back and bit my lip as I came. I felt Levi squirm a little as the cum hit the back of his throat, but he didn’t give me any sign that he was struggling. When I finally let go of his hair and my dick slipped out of his mouth he took a moment to inhale and exhale as he tried to catch his breath.

“You okay?” I asked making sure I didn’t go too far and hurt him.

He just nodded before looking up at me “that was hot,” he finally whispered with a raspy voice.

I looked down and saw he had got excited from all this. I helped him up on the bed and looked him in the eyes, “you want me to return the favor?”

“No, I want you to fuck me,” he said and I felt my dick twitch as he was direct with his wants.

“Are you begging?” I asked.

“Shut up,” he breathed, closing his eyes and letting his head fall back on the pillow. “Just fuck my brains out already.”

“I’ll take that as a yes,” I said positioning myself between his legs and rubbing him through his pants. He just lazily opened his eyes and moved his head to watch me. His lip between his teeth as he started to feel it.

“Stop teasing me,” he finally let out, closing his eyes.

“Tell me what you want,” I said and he knew he had to beg.

“Please fuck me until I scream,” he whispered out.

“I can’t hear you,” I said back smugly.

“Just fuck me until I scream,”

I quickly pulled his pants and underwear off and turned him around so that he was on his hands and knees in front of me. I slipped a finger in and he let out a frustrated sigh. “Just put it in.”

“No, it’s going to hurt, idiot.”

“I don’t care.”

“I do,” I rolled my eyes and continued by adding another finger. I felt as he jumped a little but he didn’t say anything. I think he was a little surprised not expecting me to speed this up.

I grabbed the condoms and lube from beside the bed and got everything ready as I finished prepping him.

I slipped on the condom and poured some lube on my hand. “Ready?”

“No,” he said sarcastically, “It’s almost like I’ve been saying that for the last ten minutes.” Even with his back to me, I could tell he was rolling his eyes.

I grabbed his hips with one hand and the other I used to position myself. I slipped it in and felt as his body tensed around me. “See it hurts doesn’t it?” I asked.

“Not at all,” he said, moving his hips back to try and get me to continue.

“Well aren’t you being slutty tonight,” I asked watching him fuck himself against my dick.

“Well someone has to do it since you're not,” he grumbled.

“Oh really?” I asked before grabbing his arms and pulling them back slamming him against my dick.

He let out a loud gasp before trying to silence his moans. I thrusted into him as I pulled him back on my dick. His back arched as his ass slammed back. The room filled with the noise of skin slapping against skin and the low moans as we failed to hold them back.

“Fuck,” he finally breathed, “I can’t.”

“Come for me,” I said whispering in his ear as I gave him a final thrust, “come.”

He let out a low moan as he came, his muscles relaxed and I came too as he tightened around me. We both collapsed down on the bed I laid on his back, my dick still twitching inside of him as we rode out our orgasm.

I pulled out and gave him a kiss on the neck nipping at it lightly as he let out a little laugh. “Having fun?”

“Yes,” I said nipping at his neck again.

“Let’s get cleaned up,” he said trying to get up but with me laying on his back he found it impossible to move.

“Five more minutes,” I said, wrapping my hands around his waist.

“Fine five more minutes and then we are cleaning this up, and showering.”

“Fine.”


	109. Beg

“It’s been five minutes, now get up,” Levi groaned.

I just kept placing kisses on his neck and back. “Five more minutes,” I said again.

“You’ve said that five times now,” Levi grumbled, “it’s been almost thirty minutes we need to get cleaned up.”

“Or, hear me out,” I said before getting really close to his ear, “we can just do it again.”

Levi went quiet for a minute and I watched as he slightly turned his head to look into my eyes with a smile on his lips, “that’s not a bad idea.”

“You got hard just at me agreeing?” he asked.

I realized that by the way, we were laying my dick was already on his ass and he must have felt it poke him. “Is that such a bad thing? It means I really love you.”

“It means you're just a horny mother fucker,” Levi corrected. He moved his head, gesturing for me to get off so we could move.

I sat up and watched as he instantly pushed me down and straddled my lap. “I want to take the lead though,” he said lightly grinding his hips against me.

“That’s fine with me,” I smiled looking him up and down. What a gorgeous sight in front of me. My lovely boyfriend is grinding down on me. His cheek red and flushed as he bit his lip concentrating on what he was doing. His beautiful body on display in front of me. I couldn’t help myself. My hand moved on its own and touched his chest. I traced the outline of his scars and let my fingers follow the side of his body down until my hands rested on his hips lightly gripping at his skin as I grinded my hips to match him.

“Your thoughts are so annoying,” he rolled his eyes.

“What I’m just admiring you,” I said gripping at his hips and squeezing as I grinded hard against him, making him bite his lip. He let out a quiet moan escape as he threw his head back. His hands were positioned behind him holding onto my thighs as he leaned back.

“I said I was taking the lead,” he said before grabbing my hands off his hips and pinning them above my head with one hand. He let go of my hands but I could still feel the pressure of them being held down. He was using his powers to pin me down. “Just lay there and look pretty,” he said, giving me a smile and I sighed.

“You're making this really hard,” I sighed.

“That’s not the only thing I’m making hard apparently,” he purred as his fingered lightly stroked down my shaft.

I bit my lip as I watched him scoot forward and start grinding his ass against my dick. My breath caught in my throat as I watched helplessly. I couldn’t move. All I wanted to do was pin him down and fuck him until he couldn’t walk.

“Can I put it in?” I asked. He was so fucking sexy and I couldn’t wait any longer, but I couldn’t do much about it.

He thought about it for a moment and came to a conclusion giving me a devious smile. “Only if you beg.” I realized that when he said he wanted to take the lead it meant it. He wants to be in full control and honestly, I’m okay with that but begging. Am I really going to stoop to that level?

“You know I’m not one to beg,” I said and he raised an eyebrow so quickly. He didn’t even have to say it for me to know exactly what he was thinking.

“Fine fine,” I laughed knowing damn well that I was lying when saying that.

“But you have to come closer,” I said and he leaned over me, his face a few inches from mine.

“This close enough?”

“Little closer.”

He leaned over until his face was directly in front of me, placing a kiss on my lips he whispered, “Close enough now?”

I nodded and moved my head slightly so that I could whisper in his ear. “Levi please,” I moaned out, “please let me put it in baby,” I said and I could feel his dick twitch against my leg.

“Good boy,” he whispered back, placing another kiss on my lips. “Okay, I’ll put it in,” he said leaning back. He slipped another condom on me and I felt as he positioned my dick at his entrance. He slipped the head in and I could tell he was going slower than normal.

“Oh please tell me you aren’t going to tease me the whole time,” I groaned.

“Are you complaining?” he asked before moving so that the head was no longer in.

“No, I didn’t mean it like that,” I said biting my lip.

“Then what did you mean?” he asked.

Damn, he was going to be difficult about this. “I just meant that I want to be intimate with you as soon as possible cause I love you.”

“What was that about me teasing you?” he asked his eyes looking into mine daring me to say it again.

“I would be honored if you teased me,” I said, correcting my previous statement.

“That’s what I thought you said,” he nodded, “ but now I’m not really sure if you want this. You made it seem like you didn’t.”

He wants me to beg again. Fuck. I took a deep breath feeling the embarrassment rush over me. Fine. “Please baby, I need you.”

“Need me to what?”

“I need you to put it in and ride me for all I’m worth. Fuck my brains out. Ride me so hard that I forget my own name.”

He leaned over and whispered in my ear, “that’s a good boy,” before nipping at my neck.

He lowered himself back down slowly putting the head in and I bit my tongue so I didn’t criticize his teasing. “Fuck babe yes,” I said moving my hips slightly trying to get deeper. His hands moved and pinned my hips down.

“Hey,” he raised his voice slightly, getting my attention. He clicked his tongue and shook his head. “Someone’s not behaving. Am I going to have to pull you out again since you can’t behave?” he asked.

“No please,” I whined, “I promised I’ll behave.”

“You better. If you misbehave again I’ll just finger myself and get off without you.”

As much as I would love to see that it sounds like actual torture. Having to watch him have all the fun and not being able to touch him. “I’ll behave, I’ll be a good boy,” I said back in a breathy whisper.

He gave a stern nod and lowered himself a little farther down and it took everything I had to hold back from thrusting my hips upward. He froze for a second watching me waiting for me to fuck up and when I didn’t he gave me a smile. “Very good,” he said in a patronizing tone. “You're such a good boy for me,” his tone changed to a low purr and I found it even harder to hold back. I bit my lip and dug my nails into the palms of my hands.

He lowered himself down a little more and I threw my head back, “fuck baby you’re driving me crazy,” I whimpered my self-control dwindling down to nothing.

“I know, but you have to endure it, baby,” he whispered. He lowered himself all the way down and started slowly bouncing up and down. He was driving me crazy. I couldn’t hold out much longer. I think he knew that so he started picking up his pace making it a little more bearable so I didn’t lose my control.

“Just a little longer baby and I’ll let you start moving,” he said, giving me a motive to hang on just for a little while longer.

A few minutes went by and I was over my limit. I was so close to breaking when he finally spoke up. “Such a good boy,” he said letting go of my hands, “as a reward you can now touch me and move.”

Instantly my hands moved to his hips and I thrusted upwards making him moan out as his hands moved to my chest to steady himself. “I’m already close baby,” he said, leaning his head on my shoulder.

After a few more thrusts he came on my chest and tightened around me. “You're squeezing me so tight you’re gonna make me come,” I said biting my lip as I gave a few more thrusts. I couldn’t hold out any longer and came letting out a breathy moan. “Fuck baby. That was hot.”

“So hot,” he breathed. He laid down on my chest and played with my hair as he looked into my eyes. He softly pressed his lips to mine before laying his head down on my shoulder. “But now we need to get cleaned up.

“Five more minutes.”

“We aren’t doing this shit again,” he rolled his eyes.

“It’s fine, just five more minutes.

“Fine. But only five minutes this time.”


	110. Bad Guy

With nothing to do the next few days everyone spent them training and trying to process their grief. Most of us were fed up with everything and the sparring because a lot more of a way to get all of our anger out. Feeling everyone's emotions was really exhausting and I had to spend a lot of time in my room. Eren kept me company, but the few times we did leave there was silence surrounding everyone.

Berthold was either locked in his room or in the sparring circle. He never really talked to anyone aside from asking to spar or ref. The only people he was talking to were Shadis and Annie, and that’s because Annie wasn’t giving him much of a choice. He only asked Shadis to talk when he needed it and I think that’s because he and Shadis are going through the same thing. They both lost a person they care a lot about. Berthold lost his boyfriend, but Shadis lost someone who was practically a son to him.

I looked over at Ymir who was watching Annie and Berchtold's match from afar. Shadis was reffing their match. I was wondering when she was planning on addressing the ghost in the room.

I locked eyes with her and she just lightly shook her head before walking away. I mean I know she thinks it’s too soon still, and it probably is, but from what I can hear when Berthold does leave his thoughts unchecked he’s not doing so well. It could make things worse, but how much worse can things get?

We need to have a mission and fast or Berthold might slip out and start taking matters into his own hands. Luckily from what I’ve been hearing they have been finding more information and we might be able to start planning a mission, but whether they can plan it in time is the real question.

I just followed after Ymir. She knew damn well what I was going to say and she didn’t want to have that conversation yet, but from what I can see it’s now or never. I finally caught up to her before she got into her room. I grabbed her arm and gave her a look and she just let out a sigh.

“I really don’t want to. This isn’t going to go well.”

“You don’t know that. I think he’s had enough time to process-.”

“You're full of shit.

“I know I am, but you're not the one hearing his thoughts. We gave him time, but now it’s gotten to the point where if we don’t tell him now we might lose him for good. I don’t know about you, but I’m sick and tired of losing friends whether it’s because they die, or they lose themselves trying to fight this damn war either way I’m sick of it.”

She just sat there and stared at me for a few minutes before letting out a long frustrated sigh. “Fine. I hate it when you're right.”

“So do I,” I mumbled. I hated this as much as she did. Why of all the people were we tasked with doing this? Ymir isn’t the most gentle person when delivering information, and I’ve always been pretty blunt. This is a sensitive topic and it needs to be eased into, but I know how we both are. We will just blurt it out.

“Can’t you just do it?” She whined.

“Me why me?”

“Because Imma make things worse.”

“We’re both going to make thighs worse.”

“Well do you have a better idea?” She asked and I felt as a lightbulb turned on upstairs.

“Actually I just might,” I nodded before walking away with her trailing behind me confused.

“Guys, I know I didn’t like being left out but this isn’t what I meant,” Eren said awkwardly as we walked towards Berthold’s room.

“You already promised you would help,” Ymir said, not even turning around to face him.

“Yeah, which I’m still not sure how you tricked me into agreeing. Did you get Christa to use her powers on me?” he asked.

“No, she doesn’t even know about any of this,” Ymir mumbled with a frustrated huff. Her thoughts made it clear that she would much rather be… cuddling… for a lack of better words, with Christa than be talking about this.

We stopped at Berthold’s door and both looked at Eren waiting for him to knock. He looked me dead in the eyes and shook his head before thinking. I have to be the one to break it to him then one of you bitches are knocking.

Fair enough. I raised my hand and knocked on the wall. It was silent for a moment. I knocked again and it was still silent for a dead second. Finally, his voice rose up, “Go away.”

“Well, you heard him,” Ymir said, starting to walk away.

I grabbed the back of her shirt and stopped her from walking away, “No you don’t.”

“Berthold, look I know you might not want to talk, but we need to.”

“I don’t care,” he said back, getting more frustrated.

“It’s about Reiner,” Eren said hoping that he would change his mind.

“Like I said I don’t care,” he said back again, this time his tone was a lot more forced. I could hear his words quivering as he tried to keep his voice neutral.

“You’re lying.”

“So what if I am it doesn’t matter. Just go away already.”

I let out a sigh and grabbed both Ymir and Eren knowing they aren’t going to like what I’m about to do, but we have to do it. He’s had his time to grieve, to mope, and process, but he’s wasted all of that time and just shoved down his emotions. Now he’s lashing out at us because he’s hurting and it’s about time someone knocks some sense into him. Screw being gentle he needs this knocked through that thick skull of his.

I barged into his room dragging those two in with me. “Alright listen here you piece of shit,” I started and I don’t know who looked more shocked. The two behind me or Berthold himself.

“I know you’re hurting, and I know that you would like nothing more than to forget everything, hell even just take revenge hoping that will make you feel something other than the hole where your heart used to be, but it won’t. Treating your friends like shit isn’t going to fill that void either. What will is sitting down and talking it out like an adult, not lashing out like a child.”

“Yeah and how would you know what will help me?” he asked, getting in my face, “it’s not like you’ve ever lost-.” He cut himself off realizing what he was saying.

“Never lost someone I loved?” I asked. “You're right. It’s not like I lost two of them at a young age and had to figure out all by myself how to cope with that pain, that trauma. It’s not like everyone I ever knew turned against me when I needed them the most. It’s not like I was in your shoes thinking what could I have done differently. It’s not like I didn’t want revenge too. The only problem was I had no one to blame so I turned it on myself and made it my fault. So I took revenge again and again and again against myself and it didn’t help anything. So what makes you think if you do it it will be any different?

He didn’t say anything, he just kept his eyes to the ground. He wasn't man enough to face me after all that talk. Sorry Eren, sorry Ymir. Guess we aren’t going about this gently anyways might as well just rip the bandaid off and go for it.

I grabbed his shirt and pulled it towards me making his eyes meet mine. “You think Reiner likes seeing you this way? You aren’t the only one suffering here. We all are, and I know you are affected the most by this, but just acting like he doesn’t exist anymore isn’t going to solve anything. He’s watching you pretend he doesn’t exist, that you don’t care about him anymore, how do you think that makes him feel.”

“I- he. You're wrong. He’s gone.”

“He’s dead, but he’s still around. A part of you had to have known he would come back, watch over you and all that.”

Berthold just stood there mouth opening and closing before he finally just shut his eyes tight as everything went through him at once. I felt his legs start to give and walked him over to his bed sitting him down. He clung to my shirt and just let it all out.

I pulled him into a hug and rubbed his back. “Let it all out,” I whispered, “Sorry to be so rough about it, but you didn’t leave me much choice.

It took nearly an hour until he was able to calm down. He took a few deep breaths and finally calmed himself down enough before turning to Ymir. “Can I talk to him?”

She nodded and shooed us out so she could have some privacy. I’m assuming by Reiner’s request.

“Bitch waited until after I did the hard part,” I mumbled.

“Well, no one wants to be the bad guy.”

“Yeah, now we have to wait for Ymir to finish up in there,” I sighed knowing this was going to take a while.

“Why?”

“Because we have to tell Pixis next.”

“Fuck.”


	111. Two Dumbasses

It took a while but Ymir finally poked her head out and spoke to us. “Imma be here for a while, can you just send Shadis to us?” She asked and we didn’t mind dropping the responsibility of telling him on her.

“I’ll go grab him and tell him to go to Berthold’s room,” Eren said before starting to walk away, “I’ll meet you back at our room.”

I just shrugged it off and headed back to the room. Eren thought I was having a hard time after what Berthold had said, but in all honesty, I didn’t care what he said didn’t really get to me since I knew it was out of rage. He didn’t mean to bring that stuff up and sure it hurt having to talk about all that, but it got through to him. It woke him up and snapped him out of this mess.

I collapsed down on the bed and waited for Eren to come back. He’s just going to be bugging me about emotions and wanting me to talk it out. He’s expecting me to be a wreck right now, but in all honesty, I’m perfectly fine.

I’m worried about telling him that though because I don’t think he will believe me. He’s just going to think I’m holding everything back when in reality I’m perfectly fine. Now I’m overthinking this. I sat up and let out a sigh hoping that he would just believe me when I tell him I’m okay.

There was a knock on the wall and I felt a little confused cause Eren would just walk straight in. “come in?” I mumbled.

Oh, it’s Pixis. That explains the knocking.

“Do you have a minute?”

Thank god that gives me time before dealing with Eren. I love him to death but sometimes when I say I’m okay I actually mean I’m okay. “Yeah, we're heading to your office?”

“I think that’s best,” he nodded. “More private.”

“Okay.” I stood up and we started heading towards his office. I bumped into Eren in the halls and gave him a smile. “I’ll be back,” I said and he nodded and walked towards our room.

Walking into the office and taking a seat things felt different than normal. I'm assuming this is an update about the information, or maybe they found enough information for a mission, but Pixis seemed more concerned than anything.

"Is something wrong?" I asked before I could stop myself. Even if something was wrong I doubt he would tell me.

"No, everything is fine," he said back without a second thought. That answer seemed more out of habit than a genuine reply.

"Well, something is-" I cut myself off and reworded it hoping that he wouldn't just shut me down again, "different."

"Yes," he sighed, "different," he took another moment before proceeding on. Almost as if he had to think of what to say in order to not say something wrong. "This whole situation is different. We've never had a situation like this."

"Situation like what?"

"Well, all of our other miss- uh- situations have been-."

"Stop." I cut him off. Now I see why he was being so weird with wording. He doesn't want to admit we have enough information for a mission because he knows the second he does I will jump on it. I mean he's right, but there is no need to beat around the bush with it I would have caught on eventually. "Go back."

He let out a sigh knowing he already slipped up. "We still don't know if we have enough information for it yet, and if we did this would be more complicated than any of our other missions," he explained why he was so hesitant on bringing this up.

"Okay, I hear your concerns," I said, trying not to immediately jump on the fact that there might be a possibility of a mission, "but I need you to tell me what we do know and we can come to a conclusion together."

"That's fair," he nodded. It made sense now why he wanted this to be more private. If Eren tagged along then the both of us would have definitely jumped on the opportunity without a second thought. No discussion or anything could have brought us back to reality.

"So what we know so far is that we know nothing." Well, that's a hell of a way to start.

“Okay,” I said awkwardly trying to figure out why he’s calling me in here to tell me he still knows nothing.

"Well there's a reason I'm not too keen on starting a mission,” he continued. “So we have a date and location for some of these press conferences, but,” he said looking me in the eyes, “we have no clue how many guards are going to be there. We don't even know what we can really do about these anyway.”

“Well, I’m not saying we can go grab him right now, but Eren did have some ideas that I really think would help.”

“Well, let’s first decide what we will do about the lack of knowledge about the guards, and how we will handle any other situations that will arise.”

I nodded in agreement and I let him continue talking about all the issues he was coming up with and all the information they didn’t know that could be troublesome. The whole time I was trying to think of solutions but was coming up blank.

“Alright, so let’s brainstorm some solutions,'' he said and I nodded. We both just sat there quietly for a few minutes thinking.

“Maybe we could- no that’s stupid,” I mumbled.

“What if we- no,” he said and we dropped back into a silence as we tried to figure something out.

What if…” my voice trailed out as I shook my head. We went back and forth all of our ideas falling flat before we could even say them.

Pixis let out a defeated sigh slouching back in his chair. “Okay call Eren in.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, we're both too dumb to figure this out.” he laughed, “he has amazing ideas so even if it means we have to go through with this he will come up with better ideas and solutions than we ever could.

“I’m glad you said it and not me,” I said before standing up and going to grab him.

I walked into the room and Eren jumped up and greeted me. “Hey are you okay?” he asked first and I remembered that he was worried about me.

“Oh about earlier yeah I’m fine that didn’t bother me too much,” I shrugged. “But I need you to come with me.”

“Oh okay?”

“We're dumbasses and need your help,” I said, explaining and I guess that wasn’t a good enough explanation for him.

We walked in and Pixis looked at him, “did he tell you why you were brought in here?” Pixis asked.

“He said it was cause you guys were dumb asses?” he said mostly asking as a question.

“Yes, we are,” Pixis smiles, having him take a seat. He filled Eren in on what we talked about and Eren nodded along.

“So you want me to come up with all these solutions because you two are too much of a dumb ass to come up with a single one,” he asked double checking with us.

“Yeah, pretty much.”

“I would say you two are sharing a brain cell, but I think that would be one too many,” he mumbled before kicking his leg up over mine and getting comfortable.

“Alright get your pens and we will go down the list one by one.”

Pixis grabbed a notepad and pen and gave him a nod.


	112. Both

I took a few minutes to think before nodding and finally speaking up. “I think I can come up with some solutions for most of the issues.” I glanced at Levi who still had my leg in his lap gently holding onto it. I gave him a silent smile and thought to him that I wouldn’t get too overboard and insisting on the mission without working out all the bugs first.

I turned back to Pixis and started talking. I knew he wasn’t going to like what I had to say at first, but I would have to explain why I needed to tell him my plan even though he told me not to make a plan.

“Well, one of your main problems was that this was a new type of mission and you didn’t know how to plan for it or how to even make a mission that would help with our problem, which I can think of one thing we can do. I know you said we aren’t sure if we are actually doing a mission yet and that I shouldn’t get my hopes up by making a whole plan, but just hear me out because my solutions won’t make sense unless you know the plan.”

He stayed quiet for a minute, his eyes staring into me as he tried to read me to see an ulterior motive. Sadly this time there wasn’t any. No mischievous planning or reckless schemes, just a plain explanation.

“Fine, go on then,” he mumbled sitting back hoping he wouldn’t regret this.

“Okay, so what we do know is that they are planning some sort of press conference and almost like a town hall meeting with people and reporters right?” I asked going back over what he had already said.

“Yes.”

“Well, they would use this to spread their propaganda and fear-mongering right?”

“Yes,” Pixis nodded again squinting his eyes and furrowing his brows as he tried to figure out why I was repeating all this.

“Well, what if instead of spreading their propaganda they told the truth. They told the people what was really going on behind the curtain the government has pulled over their eyes.”

“And why on earth would they do that?” Pixis asked.

I just looked at Levi who gave me a smile already knowing what my plan was. “Well, we could do it one of two ways,” I said before sitting up a little taller in my chair seeing the intrigue on Pixis’s face.

“Gunther’s power is all about making people tell only the truth or only lies,” I started, “However, with his power, we can’t guarantee what will come out of their mouths,” I said and Pixis raised an eyebrow. “So my other option is Eld, who can control what people say. We write a script and have him force the person to say it.”

“But how would we-.”

“I’m not done,” I cut him off. I wasn’t trying to be rude, but I knew he would have a lot of questions if I didn’t go through the list of problems we were already running into as well as a more fleshed-out plan that would guarantee people's safety. “So now onto the issues we will get more into the specifics when it comes to that,” I said as a quick explanation and he nodded.

“One of the problems you were facing was that we didn’t know how many guards would be there and how to get in right?” I said addressing this one specifically.

“Yes, that was a concern of mine.”

“I propose that we don’t have to get in at all,” I said, and instantly I saw doubt and a protest appear on his face but I continued before he could cut me off. “Here’s why. We know Eld’s powers work from a range. As long as Eld can see the person then he can control what they say,” I reminded him. “I wanted to test just how far of a range that is, does it work through binoculars? Does it have to be with his own eyes? If so, how far is the range? Once we know the specifics we might find out that he might not even have to infiltrate the meeting as long as he can see the person. Of course, that all depends on where this is going to be and what’s around, but I can also come up with a solution if we do have to go into the meeting.”

He sat back after listening to my explanation with one question, “What would be your solution if we had to go into the meeting.”

“We disguise ourselves as normal civilians no masks no costumes just normal everyday clothes. Nothing that sticks out, just ordinary everyday clothes that blend into the crowd. We send a small group in with him that can handle things if shit hits the fan as well as have a fast getaway. We don’t group everyone up together because that might make us stand out more, but we have a few groups of people not too far but not too close to each other each with abilities to get away if need be.”

“Who did you have in mind?”

“Well off the top of my head Connie, Erwin, Hitch, and Christa. We could even have Levi and me in there just for safe measures. Levi can try and focus in on the guards' thoughts near our groups to see if they are getting suspicious, and I will be there in case shit hits the fan I can help. I’ve been focusing on my powers affecting only specific points and I’m confident in my ability to only pin the guards down leaving normal civilians out of harm's way.”

Pixis sat back thinking it over for a moment, “If, and this is a big if,” he specified, “we do go through with this mission then I will be added in because I can protect you guys with my force fields in case anything gets too hectic.”

“That’s a good idea,” I nodded.

“Alright, so how would you plan on getting us all in?” he asked.

“Christa, Hitch, and Eld,” I said back without hesitation, “Christa could easily talk our way in, “and Eld could control what people say and just have them say we can come in. Hitch we could just have her bling the guards and walk right past them.”

“And the guards? What if there are way too many?”

“I’m counting on it,” I nodded, “which I also have an idea, but I will admit I’m not as confident in this one,” I said honestly. “We could have Nanaba and Mina help out. Mina will be farther away in a safe location with someone looking after her body probably, Annie, and Marlowe. She can possess one of the guards and keep them off our trail. Nanaba could also shift into a guard if we can get a hold of one of their uniforms and do the same thing.”

“I see,” he nodded, “That might help a little, but I’m not sure how much good that will do,” he mumbled.

“If nothing else this is where Hitch would come in good use. She could create a big illusion and just make us disappear from everyone's sights.”

“We would have to act fast. Her illusions don’t last that long on that grand of a scale.”

“Yes, but it would buy us enough time to get the hell out of there and teleported back to safety if we hurried,” I said and he seemed to agree with that.

“Alright. So far your ideas aren’t too bad,” he nodded in approval. “Keep em coming.”

“Okay, another issue you had was that there will be civilians and you didn’t want them getting caught in the crossfire.”

“Yes, that would not be ideal.”

“I think this plan ensures the most safety for both us and them, with what I explained so far. We don’t want to use our powers and out ourselves unless we have to, and everyone should be safe unless we do that, but also the civilians work to our advantage. We won’t have to jump to instantly using our powers. If any of us feel like we are in danger all we have to do is blend into the crowd more, whether that be ducking down behind some people. Quickly changing our appearance as much as possible, hats, sunglasses, jackets, anything that we could change quickly and almost seamlessly while getting more lost in the crowd it will be harder for anyone to locate us if we are suspicious.”

“Like those old spy movies?” Levi asked laughing a little.

“Exactly,” I nodded before rolling my eyes at him. “Don’t laugh that shit actually works.”

“I believe you, it works, but how are we going to pull that off effortlessly?”

“Practice.”

He didn’t seem as convinced with that, but hey a little practice goes a long way. He just gave a slight nod not as convinced with that as the other ideas, but he didn’t totally shoot it down.

“As for your last few concerns of us never doing a mission like this before, your right we haven’t, but if we never branch out we are never going to win this war.”

“He’s got a point,” Levi mumbled to himself before clearing his throat realizing he said that out loud.

“Well, there is a new concern now,” Pixis mumbled, “We would be going on this mission without masks. Meaning if it all went to hell they would know exactly what we looked like. Meaning whoever was discovered won’t be able to show their face in public until all this is over.”

“It’s definitely a risk, but then again we already are afraid to show our faces in public. The only time we ever leave is food and supply runs. Well unless your Levi and decide to do a random recon mission on a whim,” I said letting out a playful jab.

“Hey,” he said, snapping his head towards me, his tone laced with frustration.

“All, I’m saying is we never leave base anyway aside from supply runs. So if people did get discovered we would just have fewer people to do supply runs with, but for the most part, everything should stay the same.”

Pixis took a deep breath writing the last bit of notes down as he thought everything over and weighing the options. “Fine,” he sighed, “I might have more concerns and questions later, but for right now you’ve convinced me. This might actually be a good idea. I just can’t tell if this is the safest mission we would ever go on, or the most dangerous.”

“Both?” I asked. I mean we aren’t planning for a fight, we don’t even have to interact with anyone. We just have to go and be normal, listen to a man speak and come home essential, however, if caught we have the biggest fight of our lives ahead of us.

“Both,” Levi nodded.


End file.
